More Than What Meets The Eye with Eva Marcille

00:00:08
Speaker 1: Hello and welcome to this episode.

00:00:10
Speaker 2: Will keep it positive, sweetie, guys, Today I have my baby, the one, the only, Eva, Marcel and even first, thank you so much for.

00:00:23
Speaker 3: Coming, Thanks for having me.

00:00:24
Speaker 1: I am.

00:00:25
Speaker 3: I cannot be more excited and proud of this journey. It is exactly what the people need. It is feeding, it is yummy, it is nutritious. So thank you for having me.

00:00:37
Speaker 1: On the cast. Thank you so much. Thank you. To start the death, I want to start for you to start with a song or a quotes. I'm going to do a quote.

00:00:45
Speaker 2: Okay, oh my god, I should have son, but my listen, I've lost my voice.

00:00:50
Speaker 3: It's gone impossible. You can't lose your It's in there. It is in there, there, deep in there. God, those gifts on the third Road in the tennessation tanto.

00:01:03
Speaker 1: Over here, Yes, Tenaltas.

00:01:08
Speaker 2: But you said once, you said, I've learned that I can only live for myself. I cannot focus on the world's idea of who they think I am or who.

00:01:15
Speaker 1: I'm supposed to be. I can only be the best me.

00:01:18
Speaker 2: And if that means that even though I'm eligible and should be in a relationship, maybe I shouldn't be right now.

00:01:23
Speaker 1: Because I'm not emotionally available. Baby. First of all, let's talk about you are.

00:01:29
Speaker 2: Very confident, like you don't care about what anybody thinks. I remember when I first was introduced to EVA, it was America's next time model, and you were just so fearless. You were a matter of fact, don't take no shit. And now that I know you, I'm like, that is literally that is who she is. Oh my goodness. So just tell me a little bit about your journ I know you grew up in Los Angeles.

00:01:53
Speaker 3: Yeah, I grew up in south central Los Angeles, which is very different than like the West Corridor. I'm not from a whole lot of money, from very meager beginnings, but I was raised by an extremely smart mother. She went to UCLA, she was a part of Women's lib She was very unapologetically black. She was the lady with the nose ringing and afro at work. No one else is supposed to wear them.

00:02:20
Speaker 1: Yep.

00:02:21
Speaker 3: And my father is a jazz musician.

00:02:23
Speaker 1: Wow.

00:02:24
Speaker 3: And so growing up in a musically inclined family along with a woman who was all about her business and knew that what she got in life was what she worked for, and that what she deserved in life would never be handed to her. She had to take it.

00:02:39
Speaker 1: Wow And being the only.

00:02:40
Speaker 3: Girl three brothers growing up in South Central I didn't realize I was a girl for quite some time, Like I was the girl that we would go swimming at the beach and my mom would say, you had to put your shirt on, and I'm like, but my brothers aren't wearing shirts, Like, no, you're not like them. Yes, you're not like them. You are different and you are unique. You can't do what they do. And that was my first teacher and lesson of you don't do what everyone else does because you're not like everyone else, and accepting that because sometimes you just want to be a part of the group. You just want to be a part of the fold. Everybody wants to be, you know, included. But sometimes you learn or I learned, that it's not for me to be with everyone and for everyone and for one person. It's God's purpose and whatever purpose he has for me, I use that in my day. So if it's a person I meet at a bar, if it's somebody on a corner, but the way I distribute.

00:03:41
Speaker 1: Myself, I've had to be very selective.

00:03:44
Speaker 3: About absolutely because people will always have opinions, but their opinions don't define me. They can't.

00:03:51
Speaker 1: I love that seeking of opinions.

00:03:53
Speaker 2: I remember on America's Naga Sibe model, you were very a matter of fact, that Eva the diva. Yes, and sometimes a little caddies Yes. When you look back at you were like nineteen, how were you then?

00:04:07
Speaker 3: Eighteen?

00:04:09
Speaker 1: That's eighteen you had.

00:04:11
Speaker 2: Even at that young age, you were like you owned it, like as soon as you walked on. I give that to college, though, Okay, tell me about this.

00:04:18
Speaker 3: So I was going to Clark Atlanta University while I did America's next Top Model, Wow, clarktlanda university which used to be Clark College, home of w Eb the Boys. Our school's motto is find a way or make one. That is what life is. Yeah, you find your way or you make you away. And so I remember even coming to Atlanta being in school.

00:04:40
Speaker 1: You know, you get compared to all the other women.

00:04:43
Speaker 3: I didn't understand what a shouty red it was you when I got here. I remember a guy going, god, damn Red. I was like, is that compliment?

00:04:52
Speaker 1: Right? Does that mean?

00:04:54
Speaker 3: But he expressed that He's like, you look good, but you just gained a little bit of weight. Then you gain some weight, and then people are like, you're too big to lose weight, or you're too tall, you need to you know, t girls are in or you two Petita, you need to be. Someone always has an opinion. There's always some idea of who you are. So I decided I'm gonna determine who I am, so I can't listen to the distraction of the outside noise of all these different people. Because if you go to school in the AUC everyone is from somewhere else. You got a New York swag, you got it from Texas, you got even California. You got no cow and socol You know, we get Hyphie and we keep it relaxed. But it's very different. So deciding who I was and going on the journey of discovering who I was was very important to me. While I learned my blackness in college, and then you stuck me into America's next Top Model at the.

00:05:48
Speaker 1: Same time, how did that even come about? Wow?

00:05:52
Speaker 3: Top Models origin story is crazy. So I used to love watching the fashion shows on the This st Network nine o'clock in the morning on Saturday. I was sitting and watching like oh my god, Isaac mss Rohi, Oh my god. Like I loved watching the shows, so that was my thing. And I love fashion but didn't always have money. So because of that, I figured I'd make my mone clothes. Wow, make it do what I wanted to do. So in school, not boasting, but if I wore it on Monday, they wore it on Wednesday. Like it was just a trend setting. I loved it, but it was just a different swag. And so I would see all the beautiful girls, and I decided I want to do the fashion shows. So I would watch some fashion shows and I would design some fashion shows. So that's how I got into like the fashion world. At Clark, I was on the Dean's List, super academic, the Baiting Forensic Society, so that was like my outlet, my release. And I remember one Saturday girl coming up to me in the quad saying, Hey, Tyra Banks is doing that top model show. She's auditioning here in Atlanta. Do you want to go try out? So I was like, cool, I gotta go to work at Dillard's at three, so we can go now, but I gotta go to work after that. Go The line is crazy out of the door. So I realized, I gotta go to work and make my money. I'm not sitting in this line. But something in me jolted. Something in me was like, what is this thing about? So I researched it. The next audition was in Memphis, Tennessee. So I drove my little Nissan Sentra with a donut on one time.

00:07:35
Speaker 1: Yeah, not make this up.

00:07:36
Speaker 3: We did not have a hotel room or what my friend lives. We didn't have a hotel room. I had just enough money to make it to Atlanta to Memphis and back. I did not plan on saying overnight. That was just driving, doing the audition coming back. Now, guys read subtext, because what I didn't read was this was callbacks. I had no I didn't even know what a callback was, had no idea. Wow, drive to this hotel ballroom that's hosting the auditions after work late one night. I mean, I washed up in the bathroom, put on my little jeans in my little tank top. Remember I half flats. I never wore heels, didn't know how to put on mascara in the first no make up, nothing, rent my face moisturized, and walked in there.

00:08:22
Speaker 1: Wow. So I'm sitting down.

00:08:23
Speaker 3: I'll never remember. I was on my thirty three, put the little number on a chest like a track star, like I was in the marathon. And they called the first group. It was one through forty. I stand up said say your name and tell me where we first saw you.

00:08:40
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh.

00:08:42
Speaker 3: So I was like, oh lord, I ain't trying to waste a sin on the lie right now.

00:08:48
Speaker 1: How am I gonna answer this?

00:08:49
Speaker 3: Yes, I said, whoa, I first saw you in Atlanta?

00:08:54
Speaker 1: Because I did. Technically they didn't see me.

00:08:57
Speaker 3: I saw them. I first saw you in Atlanta, and they did an audition. I remember they asked. They asked a few people to stay. I was on in the few they asked to stay. Seven hours later, they released us and said everybody, you guys can go, and they said you will be getting a phone call within the next two weeks. Now to know me, it's no. I'm a hustler. I always got three hustles, yes always. So I worked at school. I was on full scholarship Indian's list, got all the refund checks, and I worked at Baker's and dealer's. So I'm at work with my cell phone like waiting for it to go off, waiting for it to go off. And one night it was like a eleven thirty Eastern time and I get a phone call this guy It's like, hey, this is Ian from America's That's Time Model, And I thought it was my brother, So I hung up the phone even I hung up on a blessing. Then when guy got a blessing for you.

00:09:52
Speaker 1: He gonna call it back.

00:09:54
Speaker 3: Listen because I blessing called back and Ian goes, hey, Now he wasn't as enthusiastic this time. He wasn't like he was like, hey, now hang up, this is Ian.

00:10:04
Speaker 1: From Top Model.

00:10:06
Speaker 3: We want you to come to Los Angeles for the semifinal rounds. I need you to do to have a cam quorder and record yourself when we make the next phone call.

00:10:18
Speaker 1: I'm broke. What's the camp quarter? Was? Even were camera phones out there in two.

00:10:24
Speaker 3: Thousand and one? Oh yeah, so no we all had psychics chirping, you know what I mean? It was it was then. So I remember my friend Noel use his dad's credit card, went and got a cam quorder, recorded me and we wrapped that thing up and take it back. But gotta do what you gotta do.

00:10:44
Speaker 1: But he recorded me.

00:10:47
Speaker 3: And next thing I know, I had a ticket to LA and I went through the process and ended up did not only getting chosen to be on the show, winning the show, but I think the biggest nod in FLA it's not just winning the show. It is showing that beauty comes in so many different forms, and this is a form that was not normalized before I did Top Model saw a girl like me and you wouldn't see her on the cover of magazine. Now today it's like.

00:11:16
Speaker 1: Clearly why not? Yeah.

00:11:17
Speaker 3: So I love that Tyra took a chance on me, a chance on shifting to the perspective of people and what beauty looks like. Yes, And I mean I owe so much of my career to her. She gave me a leg up where no one else even cared.

00:11:36
Speaker 1: Then she managed me. Why I did not know that?

00:11:39
Speaker 3: Yes, I'm the only person Tyra, how many people you did, because it must have been at least five hundred Wow models, she has broke, But she and Bennie Medina managed my career and that's really what started me off.

00:11:55
Speaker 2: That makes a lot of sense because I was going to ask you after you got thrust into fame from going from college to being America's next time model, the first one.

00:12:04
Speaker 1: Like, what was that adjustment? Like? And I guess Tyrol would help you adjust to that.

00:12:09
Speaker 3: Tyra helped me be selective about my career choices. She taught me to earn it every day. Whatever I did yesterday was yesterday. Wow, you gotta do whatever you want for tomorrow has to be done today. Once today is over, tomorrow is the next. God willing. So she taught me that. She taught me that less was more in everything, hair, makeup, clothing, Less, it's more.

00:12:36
Speaker 1: Use your gifts.

00:12:37
Speaker 3: I have a gift of fashion, and in a fashion business, you'd be surprised. You wouldn't be, because you know this business a lot of beautifully dress people out there that don't have a clue how to put their outfits. Oh, absolutely have no fashion sense. So she's like, use your strengths, tap into your talents. But when it came to adjusting to this business, I think Tyro was so famous for so long and I was so knew. There is definitely a large space between when she first broke and then when she started breaking other people. She broke at sixteen in parents, you know what I mean. I met te way later. So my adjustment has been a lot for me is just staying grounded to my faith. Yes, it's so many rooms I've been in and it's just me and God. It's just me and him.

00:13:27
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's the only one that's.

00:13:28
Speaker 3: Always, always, always, always been there always. That's so I knew he needed to stay in my foundation and my friends. I only keep lights around me, only try to keep people around me that bring me light, bring me positivity. And I didn't think I was ready for this business. But I think more so this business didnt think they was ready for me.

00:13:52
Speaker 1: Maybe because what Yes, so I think that's.

00:13:56
Speaker 3: More so what it is is that I was dropped into a business that we were redefining what this thing looked like anyway, absolutely, so, the idea of norms and who you're supposed to be and all the whispers in your ear, just do you? Just do you except what God allows, what He has for you He has. Sometimes what you want is not what God has for you. My mom always taught me God has three answers. Yes, yes, but wait no, because I have something better. Those are the only three answers that is ever gonna give you.

00:14:29
Speaker 1: Wow, I like that.

00:14:32
Speaker 3: So I just figured out which one was my yes, yes, but wait wait yes or no? Because I have something way better and.

00:14:41
Speaker 2: It's always always worked, and it's always if it's a no, it's always something better, it's always something You'll be.

00:14:47
Speaker 1: Grateful that they didn't have me, like, oh, thank god God.

00:14:49
Speaker 3: But we forced our way so much. You try to force our way, try to make them understand. And for me, leaning into being black was my joy.

00:15:00
Speaker 2: Wow, because you are unapologetically black.

00:15:03
Speaker 1: Come from your mother.

00:15:04
Speaker 3: Because you talk about my mother and my father are both panthers. What yes, my mom and dad and imagine my daddy because he's very sandy hair and blue eyes. So don't I'll get a twisted with this big black man raised in Detroit, Michigan, will let you know our blackness. We shopped at stores only that were owned by black recycle black dollars. Lamart Park was our stuffing grounds. Everything we did to recycle within the community. And learning my history and knowing my history, understanding my strength that they tried to rip away from us. I think I know that that is my power.

00:15:39
Speaker 1: It is I see it, and.

00:15:41
Speaker 3: I love being black. I love motivating other black and brown people to understand who they are, and so many times we get an opportunity and we get to a certain place in life and we're like, okay, great, now let's go into rooms with the other ones, because now it can go in there. No no, no, no, no, that's not the key. The key is now to usher and more people into our rooms.

00:16:03
Speaker 2: Talk about because people do that, they do, they do. They're like, okay, now, now I made it this way. Let me go ahead and get.

00:16:08
Speaker 3: No, no, that's not what it is. What it is is now my nine year old daughter who went to school the other day, who has lots in her hair when there were her curls, and the girls looking at her and seeing how beautiful it is and having pride in that. You know, Yes, I'm thirty eight. I remember eight thirty years ago we tried to push your hair down, my hair, big, push it down, try to shrink, to not be who we truly are in life, who God intended us to be. So I stopped apologizing for being bold, for being inquisitive, for being.

00:16:42
Speaker 1: Outspoken, for being happy.

00:16:44
Speaker 3: I think that's that everybody want to be serious all. I'm happy you are coming out, you know, I just joy? Yes, absolutely, yeah, So me I'm being unapologetically black. It definitely comes from my parents, comes from my neighborhood, and it comes from my school education.

00:17:01
Speaker 1: I love that.

00:17:02
Speaker 2: How does that translate when it comes to business, because I know as a woman it's hard to navigate this industry and you've made some amazing boss moves. Tell me some of those things, some of the roadblocks or things that you've ran into when it comes to being a woman where you really had to put that.

00:17:15
Speaker 3: The cap on.

00:17:16
Speaker 1: Yeah.

00:17:17
Speaker 3: Yeah, being in this business, being a minority is already difficult being a woman. There is an expectation that not as smart as you are pretty. That's the most frustrating one. Yeah, because I'm way smarter than I am pretty, and mama's kep endious, So your brains.

00:17:37
Speaker 1: You gotta lead with your brains.

00:17:39
Speaker 3: Yeah, when it comes to was the initial question.

00:17:44
Speaker 1: How have you navigate it being a woman?

00:17:46
Speaker 3: Yes, so that you're that I am smarter than I am pretty, that I deserve everything on this table, if not more, And then understanding that the power of my negotiation is my ability to say no, I taught them for the business. They need me as much as I need that dollar. Yeah, and I can go find a dollar somewhere else, but you're never gonna find another me. So that's the power of my negotiation, you know what I mean. Like if I say no, so cool, you got a huge bag. Say it's a two million dollar deal on the table, but you know you should get four.

00:18:29
Speaker 1: You know you should get four.

00:18:30
Speaker 3: Even though two is good, you know you should get four. You say, no, They're gonna leave that money on the table. I'm not gonna leave that money on the table. I'm gonna pick up this other money because the bag that is for me is for me.

00:18:43
Speaker 1: You're not gonna.

00:18:43
Speaker 3: Find another me. And then strength isn't knowing that, and so sometimes you have to say no. One of my old managers, Jerome Martin, I remember young in my career, I'm like, which you mean no, we're not leavings?

00:18:57
Speaker 1: You mean no that it seems like an easy job to me. I can do it. I'm like, should we gonna leave this? So you should? Yes, I'm sure.

00:19:07
Speaker 3: Exactly like your Donora.

00:19:09
Speaker 1: Yes, that's what God.

00:19:11
Speaker 3: Blessed me with the donors of the world that said, no, baby girl, you're worth more. You're worth more, and learning that worth you pull up. I remember my radio contract. I'm not gonna talk numbers, but I will say nobody's seen a contract like mine that's right now. And it's only because I was willing to say no. So many times they realize, like, get this lady what she wants because we need her on the radio, yes, you know what I mean. Or give her what she wants because we need her in this campaign. So if I have to find that much more, do you can or just don't get somebody else. Get somebody else and let them do it. Promise you they'll come back to you. I'll promise you, because they can't find another year.

00:19:52
Speaker 1: Wow.

00:19:53
Speaker 3: So the power of my negotiation and my woman has been the fact that I know that I'm a superhuman. I can do these things that most can't do. I can give life.

00:20:06
Speaker 1: Hello, I did it three times indeed.

00:20:09
Speaker 3: So God reminds me all the time. Maybe what I created and you let don't let these people.

00:20:14
Speaker 1: Tell you who you are. Right.

00:20:15
Speaker 3: If this is what you want, then go get it. This is not what you want, then wait, I got something better.

00:20:21
Speaker 1: I love that.

00:20:23
Speaker 2: It's so good. It's so good. You talked about radio. I know you're an actor. When did you decide that from modeling, you want to be an actor.

00:20:32
Speaker 3: I always loved acting, always loved acting. First player ever did in elementary school played an African princess name.

00:20:38
Speaker 1: Obatala ol fitting how fitting, right, love my roots.

00:20:45
Speaker 3: But I was the kid that I was really really smart and then a lot of things scholastically. So I wanted to do something in arts too. Because my father was a musician, so we had to play a sport and we had to play an instrument. So in first play the piano, the trombone, the guitar. What taught myself the guitar. Trombone is my best instrument. My dad played trombone. His dad played trombone.

00:21:10
Speaker 1: The trombone is is it big? It's very deep? Okay, okayong slide trump is up here? Okay.

00:21:18
Speaker 2: Two.

00:21:18
Speaker 1: I'm thinking too, she's a win though. Okay, that's what I was thinking about.

00:21:23
Speaker 3: She's a win, she's those are all win instruments. But my grandfather played the trombone, so my dad played. My dad said what instrument do you want to play? And I was like forced to play the piano growing up. So it's like, ooh, anything but the piano. I played the trombone, worst best decision. Ever, this is my dad's instrument, so we had I was in his studio every day. We're out there playing. And so in school, I can't sing. It's not my ministry. Not the best dancer. Though I can wind, I am black, I do got rhythm, but I cannot dance, dance like choreography like that. I can't do that, Jenny you so, but I can play the trompone. So I decided gonna be in the orchestra. So I was in the orchestra for all the plays. And then once I got to high school, I decided I want to be in these plays. So there's a man by the name of Mark Swinton who was my high school drama teacher. Might my name is the other day shop me listen to Mark Gonna be You're gonna be fly every time you see him. So, mister Clinton, I still call him, said Sinton, Sorry, mister Clinton. Mister Swinton.

00:22:33
Speaker 1: He burst something in me.

00:22:36
Speaker 3: He said, you don't have to be able to sing or dance to be an actress. Wow, you are a star. And I'm like, so you're gonna make me effie.

00:22:45
Speaker 1: You can't be EFFI and dreaming. You're not gonna be Effie. You can't be Diana.

00:22:49
Speaker 3: No, no, no, you can't be Laurel and none of those characters. But I'm gonna find something for you. Wow, you found something for me In every single play that I could do, that was my best wo And then each play he would challenge me again and again and again and so then when I went to college, same thing. Went on scholarship. What's my outlet? The AAC players, so the CAU players, the UC players we have it's basically a theater group. So I just did it for fun and enjoyed it. I always loved it. It was my outlet. Then I went Top Model. Tay Diggs did an acting challenge on Top Model and that's how I got to know him. Cut to first TV show. I get an audition. I'm modeling, not acting, just modeling. My modeling agent hits me up and says, hey, there's an audition for you to do this show called Kevin Hill playing ty Dick's girlfriend.

00:23:45
Speaker 1: She's a model.

00:23:46
Speaker 3: I was like, okay, cool, are there words like my adjustice, a photo shoot?

00:23:52
Speaker 1: What are we doing?

00:23:52
Speaker 2: Like?

00:23:53
Speaker 3: No, there are lines, So sending me the script. I auditioned.

00:23:58
Speaker 1: I got the job. Gig Vancouver, Canada. Okay, bright, I.

00:24:03
Speaker 3: Mean I had just won Top Model December twelfth. I remember the day, and I got this job in February, so excited. It was so excited, So the Devil tries at Uda Devil Tries. I got in a car at a motorcycle accident, got hit by a huge envoys a week before I was supposed to go and shoot the show.

00:24:27
Speaker 1: Are you kidding?

00:24:27
Speaker 3: I cannot make it up. I went straight out of the hospital. I was gonna do this job. I love Jackson Memorial in Miami. This is where it happened, and I went to Vancouver, Canada. My mom met me up there. I was wrapped and bandaged on my legs all the way up and my one episode turned into eight. Come on, Beautiful Megan Good. That was my first time working with her. It's how I know her to this day. And that was the beginning of my acting journey. After that, I went back I was shooting. I was out doing Apple Bottoms and cover Girl, Love My Shoots, shout out the Susan Taylor at Essence back in the day, Love Love My Shoots. But there was something about that set in Vancouver that just it had me yes, it's like a big fine man, you know, you just it, just get your sitting in the back of your brain.

00:25:21
Speaker 1: You can't forget about it. It was like that.

00:25:24
Speaker 3: And so I told my agent, I said, so are there any more auditions for acting?

00:25:29
Speaker 1: So, well, we really don't do that.

00:25:31
Speaker 3: We will feed over, but we really don't do that. So decided to get me knocking agent. And that's when Beanie Medina was like, you wanna do this, let's do it. So let's do That was in transition and my first two big shows were House of Pain Shout out to Tyler.

00:25:50
Speaker 1: Perry shout out TV first season.

00:25:54
Speaker 3: Again, the Inception two thousand and six What and Hanging the Restless Wow. And God knew exactly what he was doing. He did at that time because the way in which Tyler, who is a he's a mastermind. He is an absolute genius. The way he has learned how to refashion the idea of filming.

00:26:18
Speaker 1: Absolutely.

00:26:19
Speaker 3: The only other place that I see that films in that kind of speed are soaps.

00:26:24
Speaker 1: Yep soaps.

00:26:25
Speaker 3: We are sixty two to seventy five pages a day, every single day, six episodes a week, one in a piece of day. So you do one in inserts, so I would do House of Pain, hang through those episodes, go to La bang Through. So I was learning and getting the training at the same time. And I remember calling viv Vivica Fox, who had done Young and the Restless, and I said, viv what am I doing?

00:26:52
Speaker 1: Like? Should I do this job? What do I do?

00:26:54
Speaker 3: It's first contract role they had up in nine ten years for a black person. The only black woman they had on that show was Victoria Rawl, so I replaced her and played opposite Christophe Saint John the Lake Great miss him. But that's when I learned. She said, go in e and learn everything. You can use this like college. Use it as your training ground. Learn how to learn, quick, memorize. And that's my ministry.

00:27:28
Speaker 1: That's what I do well.

00:27:29
Speaker 3: I can read his book right here and regurgitate everything in that book.

00:27:33
Speaker 1: Wow.

00:27:34
Speaker 3: And I realized that's one of the keys to acting. It's understanding the story and having it in you. So Tyler Perry being able to be as transparent as he was learning this deal he did with TBS crafting House of Pain, the Ruben Cannons, the Roger Bob the way back when you know, and him being so open to letting us learn it as he learned it. I think that was so key and fundamental for me. Working on Young and the Restless, I got to exercise those chops. But House of Pain, I got to sit and.

00:28:13
Speaker 1: Live in it.

00:28:14
Speaker 3: Yeah, funny cry, It's a little bit of everything. Yeah, And it was the cultural piece I was missing.

00:28:23
Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely, the telling of our story. Yes.

00:28:27
Speaker 3: So I had two shows, both paying well, both doing well. But there was something about that House of Pain. There was something about being able to live unapologetically black.

00:28:38
Speaker 1: I have to tuck in.

00:28:39
Speaker 3: Any of my chocolate cinnamon at all. And that's where it started. And from there, I've been very selective about making sure I do shows that show black women as black women, like.

00:28:52
Speaker 2: Even wearing your hair as your Yes, we talked about, like this is a big thing for me wear hair.

00:28:59
Speaker 3: So a current TV show, I remember starting the preproduction process. So I get the job, and so now we're going through the look who does this lady look like? Okay, who is this gangster but poise business?

00:29:15
Speaker 1: But from the hood, Like what does she look like?

00:29:18
Speaker 3: And I knew she was buttoned up, but I wanted to say something when it came to the hair. I wanted black girls and women moreover to know that the way their hair grows out of their hair head is sexy. It is professional, It is beautiful, It is every day. It is girl next door, It is funky, it is all of those things. Because a lot of times you put wigs on. Wigs are beautiful. I think you and Cynthia Baylen, y'all two together, queens. No one can wear a wig like y'all. No one but Cynthia.

00:29:55
Speaker 1: That's a girl.

00:29:56
Speaker 3: But no one can wear wigs like you, guys. And also, it's not everybody's thing. Some people don't have the access to it. People don't know what they're doing. And I want it, my daughter more so than anything, in young girls to know that.

00:30:12
Speaker 1: Your hair is fine.

00:30:13
Speaker 3: Exactly how it comes out your head, it is fine. You don't have to tame it. Like Beyonce says, only a real one contain me, talk about I'm saying so once you have that sense of no, this is her, this woman is wearing locks. My production team they wanted me to wear a wig and a bob. It's like, no, we're not doing that. And I fought, and I fought, and I fought. I know you got huge battles. Now can't fight everyone, nobody, not Calisi out here. But that was a battle I was willing to fight because I wanted every frame. When I look back at this powerful, strong, amazing, feared, respected woman to stand boldly in all her blackness, Wow, oh my goodness, Oh yeah we were.

00:31:02
Speaker 1: I love it.

00:31:03
Speaker 2: Now when you go on set, I know a lot of times when we walk on sets, we don't see us in the rooms when it comes to hair, makeup.

00:31:10
Speaker 1: Even wardrobe. Sometimes our body types, our skin tone, yes, our hair textures.

00:31:16
Speaker 2: Because you come from a beauty background, are there are there times where you find yourself showing the makeup?

00:31:22
Speaker 1: Okay, I did it.

00:31:24
Speaker 3: I had a whole party that was thrown from me from my glam department. I did a film with Yo Zack. We did a h daval Ellis. We did a Christmas movie for own and thank god I was able to be a producer on there, so I had a little bit more room to talk yes and then speak up. I was wearing my locks. That was non negotiable, and I need a Lotician non negotiable. Now we are in Ottawa, Canada. Ottawa Canada is as big as its Teaca, Okay. And this is how many black folks they got in Ottawa, CA. So with that being said, you could only imagine how hard it was to find black lamb oh so difficult. I required that my makeup artist be a woman of color, Yes, because I know she understands my skin exactly.

00:32:17
Speaker 1: It's a thing.

00:32:18
Speaker 3: Melanated skin is created different, it is we are created different head to toe. So I required a loctician. They couldn't find one. I went and found one out of a hair salon who had never worked a day on set. Ever, she was head of hair.

00:32:34
Speaker 1: You found a Robert found It was a cop.

00:32:42
Speaker 3: Rob that assignment. But shout out to Nandy's Sugar in Ottawa, Canada. She's from Toronto. She lives in Ottawa and she has a hairshop. She does locks and she does hair. She knew nothing about set life. Today, well, last week marked one year.

00:32:59
Speaker 1: She'd been on sets.

00:33:01
Speaker 3: Wow, she has done nothing but set work. Her shop is doing its thing. She has done every movie that that production company has had since then. Because guess who the next star the next film was, Gabby Siebe there us they're us leading these films anyway, So starry to use a little bit of my flex and wanted my rooms to look like they look at TPS and brought in hairstylists. I brought a barber in from my co star, because they don't realize that black men need the edgeips. You can't just put some hairsprings over it's it's it's not that my friend line him up where your credit card at line them up, make a rice. And there was a point where we were doing a scene where we were supposed to be in the South side of Chicago, and we were doing a job they're helping underprivileged people get jobs.

00:33:58
Speaker 1: And I looked around at all.

00:34:00
Speaker 3: All the extras, not one was melanated. Not one person in Deval's character is supposed to be helping these inner city people make money and get jobbed. So I took my glam. I took their smocks off, their aprons, the pins and stuff, fix their hair and push them right into the scene. That's what they're right in the forefront. Because the representation of us is not always there. However, it is up to us to speak up so that it can get there. If we don't, how do we get there? How do you get a lotician on set unless you tell someone close mouth don't get fit. So I just require as soon as I start a project, what do you want? What kind of girl is she? Can I keep my hair?

00:34:44
Speaker 1: Yes?

00:34:45
Speaker 3: First question?

00:34:46
Speaker 1: Can I keep my hair?

00:34:47
Speaker 3: If I can't keep my hair, great, what kind of period piece is this? Because we must be going way back in the day. You must be going somewhere far from here.

00:34:54
Speaker 2: If I cannot keep this hair exactly and.

00:34:58
Speaker 3: Just I want to make it a new norm. I wanna make it comfortable. Yeah, you know, beautiful white women can come in with their hair exactly how they woke up, and it's fine you throw some curls in the call of the day. I'm gonna come on set with my locks just like this. Run me some edge, control my baby here, and I'm gonna go on and be beautiful.

00:35:16
Speaker 1: Just like me.

00:35:17
Speaker 2: Hello, I know that's right. You talk about working with my Zach. How was it working with Develle Ellis? That's one way we have in.

00:35:25
Speaker 1: Common, Zeval.

00:35:26
Speaker 3: Let me tell you, Kadeen, Kadeen, you got you a good little girl. Yes, listen, I love that man. He is such a beautiful person. The way he loves his family, Yes, the way he loves his wife, Kadeen, who's now my wife too. He's not my husband, She's just my wife, right, that's for clarity, But it is. It is like no other He hungers and thirst for this thing called entertainment. He loves it. He does on a whole other level. And the way he speaks life and brings life into a room, it's something you can't teach. It is either who you are or not. Since the first day on set when I met him, I realized, you a fool just like me, A hope fool, a hopeful. He is so much fun. He's so committed. I don't have to worry about his punctuality because I'm about being on time.

00:36:22
Speaker 1: Mess up my lines, Oh my, I was just talking about that. You do not play.

00:36:28
Speaker 2: You come to work and you expect from everyone else what you put into it.

00:36:32
Speaker 3: Well, I expect that, I believe they expect from me. I expect that from others. I don't expect anything more than what I will do exactly anyone, even when it comes to work, when it comes to a man, when it comes to friends, I don't expect from someone what I would not do for them or for myself. So when I come to work. We have one hundred and twenty people back here that have decorated this set, that have scouted this location, that have put these garments together, that have rigged these lives, that have done all of this to make this work. For your moment, the least you can do is show up in your moment. And my moment couple with this person's moment, couple with this person's moment is what we call a scene. Yes, So if we all get our moments together, we can make it work.

00:37:16
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I love that. It's so true. I have the same sentiments about Devel. Just amazing to work with, so good, so passionate. He's a teacher. I feel like he teaches. He's father too, like the way he treats his boys, and it's always trying to like instill values and.

00:37:33
Speaker 1: Yeah, do this, do this.

00:37:34
Speaker 2: He has a story for everything, a story for everything, story for everything, and he's very noledgeable in a lot of areas.

00:37:40
Speaker 3: He's a historian. He is a history buff, which I love playing. He is so smart, so smart. But what I love about him too is he reminds us why we do this, yes, is because we love it. We love it so there is no day you're gonna leave set where you didn't find the fun and read tap into why you're passionate about exactly, because sometimes you're so blessed and you're just it's so you get so normalized in this life that you forget that you're blessed. You forget that you don't have to do this. You could stock.

00:38:14
Speaker 1: Shelves if you want to, if that's what you want to do.

00:38:16
Speaker 3: Because if you want this, let's act like we want this. Let's act like we do. Let's feel it. And So that's one thing I love about working with him is that I pray for this dream. I pay for the manifestation of this dream to walk in what I'm walking in every day, and I am not for one second do I forget that I am walking the dream that I dreamt.

00:38:38
Speaker 1: In prayers that I pray for. He answered them.

00:38:41
Speaker 3: So the least I can do is to have gratitude in it.

00:38:45
Speaker 1: Yeah, I love that. So you have a daughter and two boys.

00:38:50
Speaker 2: Yes, so she's living kind of like in your footstats where raised with boys.

00:38:54
Speaker 3: Yes, yes, isn't and it's so crazy.

00:38:57
Speaker 1: So what are you instilling and what is it?

00:38:59
Speaker 2: Marlon Marley what are you instilling in Marley who is raising two little brothers and she's the big girl.

00:39:07
Speaker 1: I just sent her a video today, she's with her dad.

00:39:10
Speaker 3: I sent her a video and I said, remember when you walk out of the house, always be a lady. Wow, you are a leader, not a follower. You are the head, not the tell And be kind kindness, kindness, It's so important. I remember I got a report from her school saying, Marley, she talked a lot like a mom, a little talk to one, but she is the most compassionate person in the class. So there was a kid who's high functioning on the spectrum. So they're still in mars class. But when it comes to recess time and socializing time, Marlee is like she's like head a cheerleading, play center, basketball, like she's like the popular girl. And there's this one kid who is just really quiet is on the spectrum. Marlee, recess, every single recess takes time and goes So I made me cry.

00:40:06
Speaker 1: I didn't tell her to do this.

00:40:08
Speaker 3: I didn't I didn't even know about this kid in her school. Marley takes time every day to go and sit with that kid, to play with that kid, to let that kid know they're special, that there's somebody that they've seen. So for me, that's the stuff I want my daughter to learn, Not how to be this amazing actress, not how to do all these amazing things.

00:40:30
Speaker 1: That the world says are good, but be kind to people. You never know what someone's going, Yes, Marlee, you never know. She is.

00:40:39
Speaker 3: Marlee is, she has been here before. She's a different kind of a child. Remember when I got pregnant, I wanted a boy. I'm so rough, I'm like, give me a boy, and God gave me Marley.

00:40:51
Speaker 1: Wow. And I didn't understand.

00:40:53
Speaker 3: I was like, I thought, we had this conversation, guy, this is a very pretty boy.

00:41:00
Speaker 1: What is going on?

00:41:02
Speaker 3: God knew exactly what he was doing. He knew what he was doing with me. He knew what Marlee would do for me, and he knew how Marlee would change the world.

00:41:13
Speaker 1: Wow. So he cleaned me up.

00:41:17
Speaker 3: And washed me up, renewed me so that I could make a way better version of me, way better version because Marley is, she'd one.

00:41:28
Speaker 1: So she's such.

00:41:30
Speaker 3: A kind woman, little girl, and that's all I want for her. I want for my children to be kind. Yes, we would love to say the kid's an engineer, a doctor, or architect or created this. I want my child when they meet their maker for God to say job well done, and to know that the foundation of that job was me showing her the righteous way. I feel like that if I do that be my job. Yes, I've done my job as a mother. Because Molly's gonna affect change in a way. That's so. It's so crazy. And I had no idea she was that kind of kind. And I would tell her every day be kind. She wears her shirts with big sunflower on it. Be kind, it's to be beautiful. Kindness is the new beauty. Yeah, she's so kind.

00:42:25
Speaker 1: She's so sweet.

00:42:26
Speaker 3: You look so pretty today, Oh mommy, she's just so sweet, so kind. So that's what I want in part on my my my children, but my daughter especially because it will be reciprocated, not necessarily by the person she gives it too.

00:42:41
Speaker 1: M hm.

00:42:42
Speaker 3: That's another thing I learned a lot of time in life. We think that the person you give the love too is supposed to give it back to you. That's not how that worked.

00:42:49
Speaker 1: She literally just posted something about that.

00:42:51
Speaker 3: That's not how you because your heart said, and God said, you were charged to give. Love is gonna make sure you receive something of that level and magnitude, if not bigger, not particularly from that person of that same source. But it's gonna come. It's coming because if he can get a blessing through you, he can get.

00:43:12
Speaker 1: One to you. Hey, hey, so listen, so good.

00:43:19
Speaker 3: So I just don't want my baby to be a blessing what.

00:43:20
Speaker 2: She is and you are too. You called me recently this just last week, saying I want to come to church with you. I did, you did? And what was it that means? You say, I need to get.

00:43:31
Speaker 1: In the house cause you have. I hear you quoting the scriptures like you you were tapped in.

00:43:37
Speaker 3: Yes, I know the Lord. Yes, I know the Lord. He heard and here's my Cristy. All the time, all the time, it was you. You were the reason I don't want answer your life.

00:43:50
Speaker 1: Okay, girl, you need to don't.

00:43:53
Speaker 3: Like because you get church hurt easy. So you find yourself like uncle, IM going to church. I know the Bible m M for a background.

00:44:05
Speaker 1: I can get you scriptures. Time to tie.

00:44:08
Speaker 3: Let's go to Madicay three ten, bring y'all tied, just to I got y'all. I'm ready ready for you. You're ready for you, right, But this daily walk, this human experience, is what we call life. It's tough that for Instagram it's fifteen second snippets and thirty second snippets and that's not life.

00:44:26
Speaker 1: Yeah.

00:44:27
Speaker 3: Life is this thing that we are going through every single day. And it's ups and it's downs, and it's rounds and it's rounds. And your light shines so bright. Your light shines so bright, Chris, it's.

00:44:42
Speaker 4: Literally in tears before I came out of your magic. It's what we showing Instagram, like literally cry before here and like shake it off. You gotta shake it off for the hour that I'm gonna sit here for the fifteen seconds I got to smile for the can't work.

00:44:58
Speaker 1: I'm gonna shake it off.

00:45:00
Speaker 3: Don't shake it off, because your light has helped me through one of the halpest times in my life. And I don't even think you realize it because it's just your light. When you turn the light on in a room, you don't realize that that's been lit over there too, and brother, that has a little piece on it too.

00:45:19
Speaker 1: It's just your light.

00:45:20
Speaker 3: But if your light is on, it's gonna cast brightness on everything around you. So some of my darkest, darkest, ouchiest days, you've just been bright well around me, and you have inspired me to say, you know what, I don't know where she getting fed at, but I want to go there.

00:45:40
Speaker 1: I want to go.

00:45:41
Speaker 3: There to the place that's pouring into you because I'm feeling a low empty So it's you. Well, it was good because we got two of our other friends to go to church that day, No, we did, and.

00:46:00
Speaker 1: How they stuck with me in there.

00:46:03
Speaker 3: Oh my god.

00:46:04
Speaker 1: I love that.

00:46:05
Speaker 3: Church, yes, but I love the word.

00:46:07
Speaker 1: Yes, it's so good, and I think.

00:46:11
Speaker 3: God's message a lot of times it's a lot simpler than we make it in the way we have in doctrinated church in our heads and our brains. Sometimes it's like, oh, I want to be too long or what you know, I don't know what they're talking about. I need something relatable and applicable to the life that I live, exactly the journey that I'm on, the walk that I'm on. And when I went to church with you, I feel like you told this man my whole life. I'll ask him my approval at all. You tell him all that was going through. I got to check my house because I think you got some fiber cameras in there. Because he spoke directly to me, I am, I'm in my calendar, like, Okay, I'm out of town this Sunday. Next that Sunday, I'm gonna be there. Like I am so inspired because that day that walk with christ. I play my music every morning. Yeah, I know, it's all about my mindset.

00:47:09
Speaker 1: But life be lifing.

00:47:10
Speaker 3: Sometimes life be lifeing, and with the most positive minds and the best intentions.

00:47:19
Speaker 1: That would be working just hard. It does real hard. So just like yeah, that church clean ac.

00:47:34
Speaker 3: So I just needed something a little tangible. Yeah, oh my god, it's something tangible. I needed to be in the house. I needed to feel him around me and haven't been church hurt and then being who we are in business and then living in a city like Atlanta. It's hard.

00:47:55
Speaker 1: It's so hard. So I'm like, God, I want to come. Where do I go?

00:48:02
Speaker 3: So I go to my closet floor and goes to the bottom of a shower.

00:48:08
Speaker 1: Yeah you know what I'm saying. And used to go into my basement.

00:48:11
Speaker 3: I don't even go to the basement no more.

00:48:13
Speaker 1: Be living me from that.

00:48:14
Speaker 3: Yes, we don't go down there no more.

00:48:15
Speaker 1: Yeah, stay yes, oh yes. But then God say, you know it, come to me, Jesus, come here.

00:48:24
Speaker 3: But where do I go?

00:48:27
Speaker 1: I gout said to call you God.

00:48:30
Speaker 4: You was in town, you were available, like of all weekend cause I was like, I'm w a.

00:48:34
Speaker 1: We were both just out of town just the weekend before.

00:48:38
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I had I watched he had started that series when we were in LA and I watched it in my bed and Wednesday before the last Sunday, uh huh. God was like I couldnot shake it. He was like, watch it again, and I was like, oh my gosh, Okay. So that's how I told the pastor was like I had to double back on it because it was so good. I was just like, God, you are working on me right now, but.

00:49:02
Speaker 3: He's using you too, because you are in the gap for me. I don't know if you know what you are you've been.

00:49:12
Speaker 1: Oh my God, that's always my prayer. So to hear you say that, I always say.

00:49:18
Speaker 2: God when I kind of here, I just want people to sear light through me.

00:49:22
Speaker 1: Yeah. I know I'm not perfect.

00:49:23
Speaker 2: I know I don't have it all together. I'm still trying to figure things out. I still struggle with areas in my life and my faith walk. But I want people to see you through me, you know, so wow.

00:49:37
Speaker 3: You radiated parts. Y'all have been there like some good grease. Oh my god, I can't in there.

00:49:47
Speaker 2: Oh Jesus, well okay, oh my gosh, Oh.

00:49:55
Speaker 1: Yeah, take me ho. We got Robert Crime, Denorah Snifflin's.

00:50:05
Speaker 3: God cal only one cool as q com.

00:50:08
Speaker 1: He're like, I'm used to this. You're like here, they got All they do is cry. You get them to do is cry. We need one more, you know, we gonna ring it hello. Oh my goodness. Yeah wow.

00:50:22
Speaker 3: When it comes to what kind of mom I want to be, I think about my life now, not knowing that it was going to take this trajectory at all, and what I need to help me while I'm on my journey. And it's that that friendship. It's that knowing that you have someone a prayer warrior that's praying for you always, but then someone you can actually call yes. And I want to be From Marley when she is a young lady in high school, choosing college, setting off into college, choosing who she wants to date, how she wants to date. I want to be that safe place for her to ask me about anything, absolutely anything, and I want to be able to give that to her, to be that soft landing space. Now for myself, sometimes I feel.

00:51:22
Speaker 1: Like, cool, I'm gonna call right, Yeah.

00:51:28
Speaker 3: You know, that's just gonna listen, not preach to me, not tell me what I should do or what I shouldn't have done, just be a soft space. Yeah. And so that's what I want to be for my daughter, most importantly for my daughter, because if I'm not it for her, she will go look out in the world for it. She will look for it through people, through material, through titles, through all these ideologies of greatness and of being loved and being So I want to do that for her, and I want her to know that no matter where she is, where what's going on, Mommy will always be there. Mommy always gonna be there. And I can't be there like God because God is here, a different one, He a different one. He sits on my hotel room floors with me. But I want I know for me, I find myself sometimes in such such dark places where you just need somebody, to just somebody, and I want to be able to be that person for my daughter. I don't want her to be afraid to speak to me. I don't want her to feel lectured. I don't want her to feel judged.

00:52:42
Speaker 1: I remember.

00:52:45
Speaker 3: My boy, their dad would get mad because I used to say I want I wish my kids are gay, and he was like, why would you say that. I said, cause I think I would be a really really good mom to a person was an alternative lifestyle. Yes, not that I want to determine what their lifestyle look like. I just wanted to be blessed with having a child that chose an alternative lifestyle or God chose one for them, and I was the mom that was able to.

00:53:17
Speaker 1: Love him because a lot of them don't have it.

00:53:20
Speaker 3: And they go and search for other communities. A lot of my friends, my best friend is gay, and the way his mother loves him gives him a space to be free and who he is. And I know so many people who don't have that luxury, so their cague and who they are in their work space, in their family, around their friends. They don't know their truth. They can't be their truth, they can live in it. So I just want to be that kind of mom. Whatever it is Marley wants to do in life. I mean, while Disney was considered.

00:53:55
Speaker 1: An idiot in school, why are you drawing?

00:53:59
Speaker 2: This?

00:53:59
Speaker 3: Is this? This is not gonna be and now with look look at them now? Hello, I want to be the person that said keep drawing. Yes, I want to go buy them sketch books. You want a new pencil? How you want to sharpen this pencil? Mommy got you some sharp. I want to be this. I want to be the conduit, the circuit that makes her like continue to always shine.

00:54:19
Speaker 1: I love that.

00:54:20
Speaker 2: Oh my god, either baby girl, did not know you was about to bring me down like that.

00:54:26
Speaker 1: Today.

00:54:27
Speaker 2: You are everything. You carry many hats, who wear many titles, but wow, you just blew me away with your motherhood, stories, your faith walk, the business woman that you are.

00:54:39
Speaker 1: You just everything.

00:54:40
Speaker 3: Are you keeping it positive? You know, gave us a space.

00:54:44
Speaker 1: Thank you. I'm trying. I'm trying. I'm trying.

00:54:47
Speaker 2: It's been it's actually been a beautiful safe space for me. Yeah, opening up me and dinner were just talking to me about how closed off I used to be, you know, and just very private and didn't want to let people in. Thinking that as you are saying, that's the best way I'm sharing everything else.

00:55:02
Speaker 1: With the world.

00:55:03
Speaker 2: Let me just hold these things, have something to myself something, you know, and not realizing the thing the very things that you're holding is you're holding back can help people?

00:55:11
Speaker 3: Yes, you know, yes, but your opperative word and this is your beauty is the safety, the safe place. Yes you so I.

00:55:20
Speaker 1: Feel safe talking to you.

00:55:22
Speaker 3: Yeah, telling you my aches, my pains, my burdens, my woes.

00:55:26
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know.

00:55:28
Speaker 3: Try not to get make up on your beautiful white couch.

00:55:32
Speaker 1: I got something for that.

00:55:33
Speaker 3: But making it you create a safe environment. And I think with all of the social media that's out there and all the things that we see, sometimes it feels unsafe, like can I post this? Should I not post this?

00:55:44
Speaker 1: What are they going to say? What are they going to think?

00:55:45
Speaker 3: If I You know, but this is a place where honesty prevails and the truth will set you free. Well.

00:55:54
Speaker 1: I appreciate the.

00:55:55
Speaker 3: Ability to just be me and have to promote nothing. I don't have to do anything.

00:56:00
Speaker 1: I just tell my truth. I love it. I love that. Are you how you holding up? Even with the strike? I know, where are you? Good?

00:56:06
Speaker 3: Strike is driving me crazy. I have to do a I'm doing something later on to kind of educate people about the strike a little bit more in Layman's terms, it's it's it's really frustrating, but it's also empowering to see. It's like COVID. COVID I called it the Great equalizer MM, where people realized I have a skill, I'm being underpaid and I can figure out how to repurpose this skill and provide. Now a lot of people, like the famines in the Bible, suffered. I don't think there is a person on this earth that did not know someone or know someone that knew someone that suffered really bad from COVID. What it also did is gave black people, women and men alike. In the last two and a half years are the biggest entrepreneurs. We have made more money. And I'm not talking about PPP loans. Actually realizing that I've been selling insurance for this company making this much, I can start my own insurance company. Yes, because I had to do it from home anyway for this company.

00:57:17
Speaker 1: The great equalizer.

00:57:20
Speaker 3: So for the writer's strike and the actor strike, I remember in eight when we had the writers strike, we had the same kind of suffrage.

00:57:28
Speaker 1: As far as.

00:57:29
Speaker 3: Families need to eat. Billy Porter literally just sold his house, Crazy Billy Porter, the Billy Porter. He had been on Broadway people. I've been a fan of Billity forever. People didn't even know who he was until post amount of money. He made a pose alone. But you got to realize he has to fuel his machine, he has to pay people. He's building things also, so he's investing in himself. So that liquid changes.

00:57:55
Speaker 1: It does.

00:57:55
Speaker 3: And when you have a strike and you say you can't write, you can't act, you can't work right now, that becomes debilitating for a large large amount of people. Only three percent of actors are famous, only three percent of actors that are actually famouses, so the people you know weed to three percent. The rest of them are working, thriving actors that are not famous. They make regular wages and they're trying to figure it out. So the only thing that's exempt right now is I mean even background work people can't do. And they were only getting paid fifty dollars a day the day that fifty dollars a day for five days a week, six days. If you found something on the weekend, it adds up not making that money. This recession, everything being a lot more expensive. I just know that my God has a plan. He has such a plan. He does because what we're striking for, which is the way the contrasts look per streaming. I mean, my show's on a streaming platform. I love it because I know the fact that everybody else on here came here and paid to watch me. It's like a ticket price, you know what I mean. It's not like, oh I was sleepy, let's go down. I'm like, they paid to watch that. This is TV for us, by us, with our stories. Yes, so fighting to make that makes sense for the actors. For the residual money. What those dollars look like later, it matters.

00:59:28
Speaker 1: It does.

00:59:29
Speaker 3: So I'm as holding on to not shopping as much, not flying, but I'm not.

00:59:37
Speaker 1: And I always have three hustles.

00:59:38
Speaker 3: So thank God that I always have other things going on in other businesses that I'm working. But this strike definitely keep everyone in your prayers, Georgia especially. It's a below the line state, which means if you a megap artist, you can work. You don't have to be a union. You can find this dream and you can work now you can't. Yeah, even in La La is destitute. Like I mean, I know people that have traded their cars in to get cheaper cars, cars with electric cars, because everything it's just don't know when we're gonna go back to work and not knowing when you're gonna make money and having a family to feed is extremely, extremely daunting.

01:00:20
Speaker 1: It is. Yeah, it can drive you crazy.

01:00:25
Speaker 2: Like even in this time, I called you Noor and I said, hey, I want to figure out other more hustle.

01:00:30
Speaker 1: You say, three hustles.

01:00:31
Speaker 2: I need other things to come in because I don't want this to be my bread and butter. I want to put all my ags into this past because like I have investments and stuff. But when it comes to like other things I got going on, like I need something that's mine that I'll say, I know, I'm good whether it's and.

01:00:46
Speaker 3: Maybe that's what God is doing in his time. Yes, that's what I'm saying. Like that like COVID, how everything he does, even if he allows, I said, what God allows, because even if it looks crazy, Yeah, what he's going to do on the other side, on the flip side, it's gonna be so much bigger and better than you ever thought. So maybe it is just taking that time to write more because you said you wanted to write, so now you've got time.

01:01:10
Speaker 1: I got time. I got a lot of time to do a lot of.

01:01:12
Speaker 3: You said you wanted to do this, Now do it, and it gives you time to fuel it and then in no time. Because God will honor the desires of your heart, He will honor them.

01:01:22
Speaker 1: He will, And if we.

01:01:24
Speaker 3: Want to get back to work, He's gonna let us get back to work. When we go back, it's gonna be better it was before.

01:01:29
Speaker 1: It will be it will be now. I can't wait.

01:01:31
Speaker 3: I'm excited. I'm excited. I know the strike is tap dancing on a lot of us. My show hasn't shotten over a year and a half.

01:01:40
Speaker 1: Wow, a year and a half. Oh my goodness.

01:01:44
Speaker 3: Mm hmm over a year. Yeah, over almost a year and a half since we shot.

01:01:50
Speaker 1: So this happens so because you guys supposed to have to work now.

01:01:54
Speaker 3: Work now, supposed we're supposed to have a whole other season shot. So it makes me think about me. Okay, number one, all right, you saved your money. What about number two, number three? The numbers go all the way down to forty five? What about all of the families that each one of those numbers represent. And that's just for the on camera, people on the call sheet. Flip that thing over and look at all of these names and all of these people that make this work. So many people are out of the money right now. But I do believe that God has a plan. I do believe that we're gonna come out better for it. And I do appreciate the solidarity with the Guild, the writer Guilt and the Actors Guild coming together, because that was a little different than in two thousand and eight.

01:02:39
Speaker 1: It was.

01:02:39
Speaker 3: Yes, it's like that white chair in Alabama. They say, as black folks can't stick together. If if you ever wanted to know we could stick together, give me a white.

01:02:49
Speaker 1: Chair and talk. Pops on im across.

01:02:52
Speaker 3: Boy was sixteen years old.

01:02:54
Speaker 1: Swim across, swim across.

01:02:55
Speaker 3: So you're gonna find a way. We're gonna make it. We gonna we're gonna figure it out. The strike is finily tap dancing on a lot of our pockets. But I don't want us to lose.

01:03:04
Speaker 2: Hope, No, can't. This is when we really got a dig. Yes, yeah, and have that faith. Yes, and keep hope alive, keep hope at seriously, Yeah, it's gonna be okay, it is.

01:03:13
Speaker 3: It is gonna be okay. Yeah, and I get to sit over here on a couch. See, if we was filming, we wouldn't be able to do this.

01:03:20
Speaker 1: No, God know exactly what he does, does he does.

01:03:22
Speaker 2: I'm even grateful for this. This is another way I can still be creative during this time. And so I'm glad we everything happened that he already ordered the stuff.

01:03:31
Speaker 1: Yes, and I see it. I'm like, Gods, you've been working. He's been working.

01:03:34
Speaker 2: Yeah, he knew it was gonna happen in January when this was the idea was brought to life.

01:03:39
Speaker 3: So well, you've been doing an amazing job. I don't miss an episode. It's so excited, so excited. People think we go together if you're reposting you too much.

01:03:50
Speaker 1: We do. We do. We do go together. So try me. I will vet you period.

01:03:56
Speaker 2: Okay, all right, So we're gonna get into my favorite part of the show is called Positive Outcomes okay, where it's our open listener letter where someone writes in and asks us for advice and then we give them advice. Sisterem says, Hello, Crystal, just wanted to start off saying I love you and your journey. You're so relatable on so many levels. I love seeing you on YouTube instead of having to wait on a new episode of Sisters or as Atima. I'm currently thirty three years old and I've been married for ten years. I have two children, and I made a place where I feel like I've outgrown.

01:04:27
Speaker 1: My husband tremendously.

01:04:29
Speaker 2: I don't receive the same support from him when it comes to my career as far as intimacy.

01:04:33
Speaker 1: And it's been all caps, been gone. He doesn't know how.

01:04:38
Speaker 2: To stimulate me mentally. I'm gonna use that word, she says. One else stimulate me mentally like the other guys?

01:04:48
Speaker 1: What are it?

01:04:48
Speaker 3: Guess right, finish a letter? I'm ready.

01:04:52
Speaker 2: Right it still doesn't know how to He doesn't show any effort to want to change or.

01:04:57
Speaker 1: Make things better. He just wants to go with the flow.

01:05:00
Speaker 2: He's not going to file for the divorce, but will sign papers, but also doesn't try to put any effort into saving us. I just feel like we aren't evenly yoked at this point in life, and there's nothing more I can do to save us.

01:05:12
Speaker 1: I am not happy at all. Should I stay or should I move on? What should I do?

01:05:18
Speaker 3: Hell?

01:05:19
Speaker 1: God, Ashley, are you listening. Ashley need some Astley needs some help. Honey.

01:05:26
Speaker 2: First of all, okay, first, thank you for writing in Ashley.

01:05:30
Speaker 1: Thank you.

01:05:31
Speaker 2: I would say I'm not married. You know why I wanna let you take this eve Because I'm not married.

01:05:37
Speaker 3: It's a real space.

01:05:39
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm no longer married.

01:05:40
Speaker 3: I was married. It's a different space. So you have been with this man since you were twenty three, you're thirty three year Jesus here, that.

01:05:49
Speaker 1: Is not an accident. Oo.

01:05:54
Speaker 3: By nature, you were meant to grow.

01:05:57
Speaker 1: You're meant to change.

01:05:58
Speaker 3: He was meant to grow, and he was meant to change. By marriage, you were supposed to grow and change together. Yeah, and sometimes we're in a rat race of trying to do all these things to be a good wife or be a good husband. We forget the small things, the little things. I would not give you advice to stay or to go, Miss Ashley. You know that you've been knowing whatever that is in your heart.

01:06:31
Speaker 1: You've been knew that.

01:06:33
Speaker 3: But what I will say is, after you've done all you can, you.

01:06:42
Speaker 1: Leave it to God.

01:06:44
Speaker 3: You can only take a person to the well. You can't force the water.

01:06:51
Speaker 1: Down their throat.

01:06:52
Speaker 3: You can teach him. I think That's one thing that I think is very important is communication. There is no expectation without community. You can't expect him to know that you don't like your ears kissed if you don't tell him to stop kissing my ear right, Nick, like, you have to say something. Yeah, So men are beautiful specimens, but y'are not the brightest sometimes and quick on hints, so sometimes.

01:07:18
Speaker 1: You have to just lay it out.

01:07:20
Speaker 3: Yeah, I would advise you to be clear. Something tells me, after ten years of marriage and two children, you've maybe been as clear as a crystal ball. Comfort does set in, and you know, I read Michelle Obama's book and she talked about how the better part of ten years heard and Barack she was not happy.

01:07:41
Speaker 1: That crazy crazy.

01:07:42
Speaker 3: I was like, what for the better part of ten years? But she wasn't happy. But she knew that this marriage was not just about the marriage. This marriage was about moving an entire nation in the world forward. So she sacrificed her happiness in those years so that she can do her job, so that later that happiness was renewed. It was bringing back a hundredfold. That's Michelle's story. Every story is different. You have to know whatever your story is for me. I have to choose me, myself in life, my personal happiness, because my happiness is what fuels my children, It's what fuels the people that God has put on this earth for me to help blessed and to be a vessel and a conduit for So I chose me. There have been times where I haven't chose me and it didn't work out so well. So Sis, miss Ashley, you choose you, whatever that means to you. Choose you for yourself and for them to kids, because there's no amount of bandating you can do in a situation. There's no amount of tiptoeing around. Kids are way smarter than you think. And he ain't gonna go if you won't make him. So like you said, yeah, if he's comfortable, yep, it sounds like you're the uncomfortable person in the mix. He's not uncomfortable. So this is your decision to make. But know that there is no wrong decision. And one thing my mommy always tells me is even if you mess up and make a bad choice, it was your choice to make. You can get up God will it and make another Yeah. Wow, So it's okay. Whatever your choice is. No one else is your walk. Only you live and your head and your heart.

01:09:35
Speaker 1: Only you live.

01:09:36
Speaker 3: In your head and your heart.

01:09:37
Speaker 1: That's good.

01:09:38
Speaker 3: Yeah, So no one can tell you how you're supposed to feel and what you're supposed to do.

01:09:43
Speaker 1: You do what you want to do.

01:09:46
Speaker 3: I love it, and you know what that is.

01:09:48
Speaker 1: You know what to do. You know what to do.

01:09:52
Speaker 2: Thank you, Ashley, thinking that was amazing, perfect advice. Even so, now we're going to do the part of the show, Well, say what I'm going through and what I'm growing through. Okay, Okay, So I'll start off. I am going through who right now today, just seeing things.

01:10:18
Speaker 1: From other people's perspective, especially people in my life that.

01:10:21
Speaker 2: Sometimes I get so caught up in this is what I meant by this, this is how it is, but not seeing how it makes somebody else feel, you know. So I'm going through that and communicating, learning how to properly communicate.

01:10:35
Speaker 1: So I guess that's what I'm going through and growing through.

01:10:37
Speaker 3: Okay, Yeah, it's good.

01:10:40
Speaker 1: Yes, it's yeah, it's good communication.

01:10:43
Speaker 3: Key, Key, it's so necessary, Yes, it is. It's so necessary. And people can't assume you can't assume that they know, right. Yeah, So that communication is so key. Yeah, what I'm going through is learning how to be pampered and live the I have been a thug my whole life, thug life. I have hustled and tried to figure it out for so long that I feel like I got away from my softness and not being a girl with fluffy hair. But I'm always that I got it person, I got it, I'll do it. I got it. Learning how to sit back and say you know what, I'm gonna let you do it. Learning to be pampered for me, especially in relationships, that has never been my reality so now, especially in like dating, learning how to be like you know what, Yes you can you, Yes you can. So that is what I am going through and what I am growing through is taking my moments. Everything doesn't have to happen at once. Yeah, and having gone through a divorce for me, twenty four hours is a long time of a day, and you go through a lot of a range of emotions.

01:12:17
Speaker 1: Yes, and you.

01:12:19
Speaker 3: Charge yourself or I charge myself sometimes like today's has to be a good day. Being a good day doesn't mean you're not gonna stumble in the day. It doesn't mean you're not gonna need a reset in the day. I reset like fifteen times in a day.

01:12:35
Speaker 1: I do.

01:12:35
Speaker 3: I press that little butt, like all right, let's shift back because your emotions your your life. You'll get a message. Yeah, and that message is just change everything. But does it change everything or do.

01:12:49
Speaker 1: You let it? You let it?

01:12:51
Speaker 3: So I stopped letting these little moments take my joy because the joy is in the journey anyway.

01:12:59
Speaker 1: It is right.

01:13:00
Speaker 3: It's like prom. You get ready for prom and you go with your friends. You get your nails done, and what color you wear the same color, wear different colors. You're riding together. Mama much Mama got for the limo, so you get all you little stuff together. The joy is in that journey because once you get the prom, prom is like I now can't find your friends, your picture, A little crazy little curl.

01:13:20
Speaker 1: Don't fell down. You know. The joy was really in the journey. Yes, And we're.

01:13:25
Speaker 3: Looking at that end, and I'm learning to have joy in my journey instead of just looking for that thing at the end and just head down, blinders on like a horse and just trying to get there. It's like no, no, no, pull off the blinders. Look around, there's a flower. I was there's a chair. Maybe you should relax and smell it. Learning to take my moments, to really take my moments there for me. I can miss them or I can hold them.

01:13:54
Speaker 1: So so good. Oh my gosh, this has been so good. I love you. I love you too. You did this all jazz. We literally could right when we can on the couch.

01:14:09
Speaker 3: All right, I want your therapist, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, she wants what number? What episode was that.

01:14:17
Speaker 1: That was navigating anxiety with delays? That doctor delay.

01:14:20
Speaker 3: Zimmerman, doctor Zimmerman.

01:14:23
Speaker 2: Hm.

01:14:24
Speaker 3: She spoke to my heart like the pastor spoke to me at church. She's amazing therapy, she is. But this couch is like therapy.

01:14:30
Speaker 1: What you are doing.

01:14:32
Speaker 3: You are your own doctor, baby Mama, Crystal, you are the good doctor out here, winning soulsi Lord.

01:14:39
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, that's what I do. Have my own fire for the Lord.

01:14:45
Speaker 2: We do a little thing before we close out called keep it blank, sweetie, okay, And.

01:14:49
Speaker 1: I'm gonna take from young Marley. Keep it kind, sweetie. Yes, yeah, keep it kind, keep it gracious, sweety. That's good. I love it. Wow, Oh my gosh, Eva, thank you so much, thank you.

01:15:08
Speaker 2: This was this is so good guys, I hope this episode blessed you the way it blessed me. Who I know, you gonna need your clean ages and you might wanna run this one back because it's so good even with dropping gems on this one. If you wanna write it into our Positive Outcomes Listener letter, write into Keep it Positive Sweetie at gmail dot com.

01:15:25
Speaker 1: And that is sweety with an ie.

01:15:27
Speaker 2: You can follow kIPS on all platforms, and you can also follow me at luv christ Orine on all platforms, and even please tell the people where they can find you.

01:15:36
Speaker 3: You can find me at even Marcel on all platforms.

01:15:39
Speaker 1: That's right, alright, guys.

01:15:40
Speaker 2: In the meantime, until next time, you know what to do, Keep it positive, Sweetie.

01:15:45
Speaker 3: Bye,