EXCLUSIVE: Chantel Christie's Side - Basketball Wives

00:00:03
Speaker 1: Reality with the King is hosted by me, Carlos King. I'm an executive producer who have produced some of your favorite shows from the Real Housewives in Atlanta, New Jersey and my own creation, The Love and Marriage Franchise and Bell Collective. Every episode we recap reality television from the Real Housewives Franchise to The Bachelor or Selling Sunset, in addition to celebrity guests, whether in the unscripted space or scripted as well.

00:00:37
Speaker 2: Chantell Crisy Day, thanks for coming.

00:00:43
Speaker 3: Thank you so much.

00:00:45
Speaker 4: Chan. Tell Christy, let's have a real conversation.

00:00:52
Speaker 3: That's okay, That's what I came for. Okay, please come on. But I'd rather be in one central place than to try to fight strangers.

00:01:04
Speaker 5: Tell Christy, yes, yes, yes, how are you?

00:01:11
Speaker 3: All things considered, I'm okay, I'm doing good.

00:01:14
Speaker 2: Well. First of all, you're beautiful. You are a gorgeous woman. You really are.

00:01:21
Speaker 4: I do want to start by saying this, thank you so much for reaching out to me.

00:01:28
Speaker 2: It was unexpected. I open up my d M and I'm like.

00:01:35
Speaker 6: You weren't expected it, Christy, and then I was shocked in a good way.

00:01:45
Speaker 4: But what also showed me was look I have created this safe space for people like you to feel comfortable have being a conversation when they are going through something as tumultuous my mental the gravity in which you're going through things. I created this platform for that. So I just want to stop by saying thank you for what you got to me. Yes, I really do appreciate.

00:02:11
Speaker 3: That, absolutely. I mean, I feel like I've heard a lot of different think pieces and opinions on my situation and what has been showed on TV. And I watched you and Dustin's Full Thing at what hour and whatever long, and even though, like I told you, there were things in there that I may not agree with or that I would like to defend myself on, it was done in a very tasteful way, and I didn't feel attacked, And I felt like, Okay, this is You're a producer, you know what I'm saying. And so I feel like explaining to you the events that led up to this scenario, maybe you can better understand, and even if you don't agree with the way that I handled it, you can you can kind of gauge like, Okay, now, I know now that you mentioned that. But because the viewers don't get to see all of the ins and outs and the you know what I'm saying, Like the things that are cut, the things that never see the life of day. It's very hard to understand, like why would you talk to her like that? Why would you do that? Why would you so? Like I said, even if if you walk away from here today feeling like bro, you still shouldn't have did that. I'm okay with that, Like I understand that, But I do want it to be somewhere on wax my side of the story. If I never do anything else in entertainment, if I never go back to basketball lives, whatever happens, I want to know that there's that it lives in history somewhere my side of things.

00:03:28
Speaker 2: You know, I received that.

00:03:30
Speaker 4: I received that, and I seriously just cannot thank you enough for sitting down because I know everybody wants to talk to you.

00:03:41
Speaker 2: I'm assuming a lot of people reach out to you.

00:03:43
Speaker 3: A lot TMC, Shape Room, any new site that you can think of, reached out and the majority of them they wanted me to be in LA They wanted me to come out there, and I told them, you know, that's not where I'm based anymore. Like when this show was done, filming, I moved away, and I was like, I wash my hands of it. You know. So when I reached out to you and you said, listen, if I can, if I can situate this, I can be there. And I was like, now see that's journalism to me, Like you know what I'm saying, that's like, oh, okay, he's serious about the story. And it didn't give like I'm trying to be messy. It's just more so I want to get to the bottom of things, like what's tea?

00:04:18
Speaker 2: Yeah?

00:04:21
Speaker 3: That was funny.

00:04:21
Speaker 2: And so I'm like, where you live.

00:04:25
Speaker 3: I'm like, I so call my.

00:04:27
Speaker 2: Producer here like talking.

00:04:29
Speaker 4: And I said to myself, God is in this conversation.

00:04:36
Speaker 2: And I do want you to know that because for me, I did not seek you out.

00:04:42
Speaker 3: Yes, and.

00:04:46
Speaker 2: I flew in town.

00:04:47
Speaker 4: I flew my producer and I said, in order for me to have a conversation with her, I need to feel her. I need to be able to like look her face and face eye and the eye and I needed to, like I all of my guests, I want to feel the energy from you. What I will say before I get started with the questioning, you are very likable right now? You are.

00:05:16
Speaker 3: You got introduced to the world.

00:05:19
Speaker 4: You're very likable, your spirit. I didn't know what I was going to get coming into this. I didn't know if you were rightfully so in a different space. But what I want, what I want the rain drops to know right now, this is real. Y'all know a lot of y'all.

00:05:34
Speaker 2: Your energy is infectious, You're in a great mood.

00:05:38
Speaker 4: You are you, You're beautiful camera, You're stunning in person. You do have a light, you do you have something and obviously you have been a meme for the past couple of days. So before we get started, I do want to ask you, with all things considered mentally, mentally, how are you doing.

00:06:02
Speaker 3: I think I'm doing a lot better now than I was when this first dropped. And when this first happened, I think I was in a really dark space. And even though I knew that it was coming, because obviously I was there in Hawaii when it happened, and I didn't know how much they would show, but I was kind of bracing myself through the Green Screez and the interviews that I did. I answered questions that let me know, like, all right, this is gonna see the light of day, you know, what I'm saying, this is not a fight or whatever that they're gonna scrap. And so even though I tried to prepare myself, it's just different when when you're in it and you have millions of people just saying the wildest stuff. I mean, they've wished death on me. They tell me when they see me, they gonna curb stomp me on Jackie's behalf. And I'm like, you want to go to jail for Jackie? Like I'm trying to understand, Like I get how crazy this looks, right, Like it's terrible. It is terrible.

00:06:55
Speaker 2: I don't.

00:06:56
Speaker 3: I don't. I'm not negating that fact. But you guys are judging me based on how I'm handling someone that i've that has been in my life for thirty two years, right, and you guys are seeing thirty two minutes of an episode, and so it's very hard to carry that weight. But you know, I make the joke to people, I'm like, I didn't only inherit her neck, I also inherited her thick skin, not even being funny, but for real, Like I know that I can take this. You know, I have a really strong support system. I have a really strong village around me that is checking in on me consistently. When I can't pick myself up, They're there to do that, whether that be my husband, my sister in law, my friends, whatever. Like I've established a really strong support group. So I'm just taking it day by day. You know, some days it's like these people are so ignorant, like I'm not even gonna pay it any mind or attention. And then other days it's like I want to argue with every single person, and I want to prove myself and I want to explain myself, and I know that I can't, like I can't respond to each and every one of these individuals. So this felt like the safest space to do that and then just kind of wash my hands of it, you know, Like what I say here today, this is my final statement, Like I'm not going back and forth with anybody because I know that this is my truth. I know what my intentions are and what they've always been, and I'm not going to let outsiders create this narrative that really isn't me. Like if you know me and you're just meeting me, you know what I'm saying, Like you've been around me all of ten minutes. There are people that have known me my whole life and know, like, this is not who you are. That was a really bad moment in your life, and it's publicized for everybody to see, but this is not who you are. So you can't wear that for the rest of your life. Yeah, you know what I mean.

00:08:39
Speaker 4: You can't and I don't want that for you at all, and I'm happy that.

00:08:44
Speaker 2: Look, after this conversation, I agree with you.

00:08:47
Speaker 4: They have this to watch until the end of time before obviously your next ventures, and we'll get to that too, But I want to start from the beginning. Okay, let's who was Chantel Christy as a little girl with the parents of Doug and Jackie, Like what was her childhood?

00:09:07
Speaker 3: Like everybody used to call me the poor little rich girl because even though like my parents had money, people think that I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth, right, and of course, like you have those material things, but I was the kid that wanted to work for it, Like I was making the family newspapers, I was trying to do hair, like all of the little hustles. That is something that I get from my mom, you know, Like I'm a hustler. At heart. So this idea that I grew up just very privileged and like spoiled and braddy, it couldn't be the furthest thing from the truth. I mean, I think that having my grandmother in the house for all of my life, literally like she passed away when I was eighteen, So for eighteen years, I have this incredible woman that is around, dropping all these gems and kind of just raising me in the ways that my mom Couldn't you get what I'm saying. This is Jackie's mom. She's been on the show before, I think in the first season her her journey with cancer and stuff like that was kind of chronicled a little bit. And so yeah, I mean, I just even though I didn't have maybe like a conventional or like a typical upbringing, because we moved around so much. Every time my dad got traded, we're moving, we're you know, we were never stationary like I am with my kids now, you know. And so I just I experienced a lot over time, just living in Canada, living in Texas, living in California, Like, I've had so many different experiences over my life that I just have a I'm just I'm just a different person. You know, then, I guess you would you would typically meet because I've had so many experiences and I've lived so many places, and I've met so many people, Like I think in that way, I'm I'm a little more well rounded than maybe I present myself, you know, like when I get upset, obviously I have a heart time talking and expressing myself. But yeah, I just that little girl. She still lives in me, you know, but I think I have just kind of buried her away a little bit.

00:11:14
Speaker 4: When you were a little girl growing up, your grandmother obviously lives there. You were saying that you know she pretty much was not to be worse your mom, but I'm assuming the mother figure you were looking for.

00:11:28
Speaker 2: You did sit on camera that Jackie was obviously.

00:11:34
Speaker 4: Chasing Doug, but obviously there was there there with her husband as he is. Being a basketball player. We all know Jackie Christie was at every game. Did you feel like your mother abandoned you and your siblings for her husband.

00:11:57
Speaker 3: For a long time, I did feel that way, and I think that now that I'm a mother and a wife myself, and I'm married to someone that is actually in that same profession, I can understand her thought process or where she was coming from. Like, listen, it's all these groupies out here. I want to be next to my man, right. But what I realize now as a mother myself, is that that's a choice. You can choose to go and be with your man, or you can choose to be with your children. And you made your choice, and that's okay. Like it is what it is, and I can't go back and change it. You can't go back and change it. But you also can't tell me that that wasn't my experience when I had these basketball games, when I had these school events, when I had the parent teacher conferences, when I got my first menstrual cycle, like this, my grandmother was who was there for those experiences. So that doesn't take away the fact that you gave birth to me, or that you know, we do have memories throughout my life, Like I'm not taking that away from her at all. But to try to rewrite history in an effort to discredit me, that's where we differ.

00:13:06
Speaker 4: There's been conversations about there seems to be so.

00:13:10
Speaker 2: Much blame.

00:13:12
Speaker 4: With your mom and there's none with your dad, and the two of them both made the decision that have you. They feel like Jackie gets all the smoke. They recognize that your mom may not have been a perfect parent, but they do feel like a lot of the smoke your mother gets and your father doesn't.

00:13:30
Speaker 2: Why is that?

00:13:33
Speaker 3: Because these are my experiences. I mean, you can very well live in the same house and everybody has a different experience. And I tell a lot of people like my dad has had the pleasure of experiencing my mom as a wife, me and my siblings have experienced her as a mother, and there is a difference there. And if you don't acknowledge that or you don't understand that, I love that for you. But as for me, it was different. Like I'm watching you put on this like perfect, Okay, Dad is on the way home, Like let me make sure everything's good and perfect, like I've seen it in real time. You get what I'm saying. And so now, as I said a mother and a wife myself, especially to someone that's in the same profession, I understand how busy their schedules can get. You get up, you go work out, you got a shooting practice, you gotta meet with the coach, you got it's a full day's work. And I get that. So when I hear people say, well, why doesn't he get any of the blame? Do y'all think that he was just sitting there and he would just watch her like verbally abuse me and go on about his day like that's not the way that it happened. It didn't. These instances didn't. I'm telling you, she's telling me, if you don't go clean your room, your dad's gonna kick you down the stairs. And this is clearly he's not here, which is why she's saying that. But I think that the viewers are in some ways choosing to be wilfully ignorant and say, well, why are you putting all the blame on her? I'm speaking about my negative experiences with her. If that's the blame, I mean, if the show fits, wear it by all means. But I didn't have the same sort of negative experiences with my dad that I have with my mom. And I think that that's a story for a lot of people out here, that you do have a great relationship with one parent and they can very well still be married. I think that my dad has shown over these last three decades that he will love her through and through. You get what I'm saying like I'm going to try to love you out of this. I'm going to try to love you into being a better person and all of these things. So I don't want to speak on their marriage. I think that what I did and said on the show in regard to their marriage was very tacky and tasteless, and I think that being a wife myself, like I don't want nobody to do that to me. So just because I'm upset, like girl, all right now, like you know what I'm saying. But in that moment, I just saw red and I just felt so like you're really playing in my face and like now I'm just unloading the clip, like you know what I mean, and saying things that I typically wouldn't or that I know that I shouldn't. But here we are. Now we're both rolling around in a pig pen looking crazy, you know what I'm saying. So I don't know. I just and I think the tough times that I have had with my dad over the years, whether it was as a teenager or whatever, he's always apologized. He's always at the standard, he's always taken accountability. If there was something that he did wrong, he stood on that and he parented me in a way that I respect you, Like we may not have always had this perfect relationship, but I respect the way that you've treated me. And I tell people, I say, I wasn't raised for as far as my mom goes, I wasn't raised on respect. I was raised on fear. And because of that, when I believe that when you get to a certain age or a certain point in your life, that fear dissipates and then it's like I'm looking in your face and I'm telling you I'm not scared of you. And so that's what I think that the viewers aren't really understanding. We didn't have this close locked in mother daughter, Come lay down on your shoulder, tell you like, we didn't have that my whole life. We've tried, we've had those moments that you do see on the show from previous seasons where we're out and we're shopping and I got my daughter, and we've tried to have those moments, but we just we don't have that. And that's okay.

00:17:32
Speaker 4: Well listen, I'm gonna go on a limb and say that's not okay. You know what I mean, It's not okay because one thing I even said, my recap was and we'll get to the incident and later. But one thing I did say was I believe your experience, and I'm not here. I wasn't there on the zoom to negate your experience, and in person, I'm not not there to negate your experience.

00:17:56
Speaker 2: I was.

00:17:57
Speaker 4: I was blessed as a black person to have both parents in the household. I was the quintessential mother's boy before she passed away. And I've been honest with my brain drops about me and my father were not close growing up. I was scared of him. He put fear in me, and a lot of that had to do with the fact that just how he was raised.

00:18:20
Speaker 2: And we'll get through that a second too. So I disagree with you.

00:18:25
Speaker 4: I don't think it's okay, and I think it is okay though to talk about it. And I do think it's okay to listen. Just because it's the minority to say things about your childhood experience that you know to be true doesn't mean it's not your experience. Yes, the overwhelming population of the black household that we both grew up in.

00:18:49
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying.

00:18:50
Speaker 4: You don't go against your parents, Yes, but I know what it's like to adore one parent, and I know what like as a child to feel like this person doesn't like me. You love me, but I don't feel like you like me. You said something earlier that I want to go back on. You talked about your mother being verbally abusive. What did that look like for you.

00:19:20
Speaker 2: As a child.

00:19:23
Speaker 3: I think that I don't know. I think expressing the things that she said to a lot of people, it would come off as like that was a typical black household, Like your mom put fear in your hearts, she talked down to you. She But for me, that wasn't the type of parenting that I needed, right. And you, I've learned through being a mother myself that you have to kind of meet your kids where they are, and you have to handle them differently. And so I think that maybe, and this is where I give her grace, maybe you didn't know how to be a parent right. Maybe you didn't understand how to be a mother, how to talk to your kids, how to problem solved and be kind and gentle and all of those things. I can give you grace, but you can't tell me that I didn't experience what I experienced. Right, And so that's where the rub comes in, because it's like, you want to rewrite history and tell me I didn't do that. I gave you everything. I gave you the best life you did. You could provide all of the material things. He made millions of dollars and you could provide all of the things. That doesn't take away from the fact that I felt like you was talking to me really crazy, or I feel like you were emotionally abusive, or that that doesn't give me the name plenty of times the word absolutely okay, Like you tell me at twelve years old to my face, I hate you, verbatim. That is a moment I will never forget.

00:20:45
Speaker 2: Why does she say that.

00:20:47
Speaker 3: We were just in the middle of one of our many heated arguments disputes about whatever it may have been, and it just got to a point where she was like, I hate you. And I think that out of all of her kids, out of all three of us, I'm the most outspoken. I'm the one that is like pedaled to the floor, right. I've always been that way. Anybody that knows me knows that. And that's something that I need to work on. That's something that I need to change about myself and improve on. But this didn't come out of nowhere, and it definitely didn't happen for the sake of this show. This is who I've been and the instances that we've had that have been very heated. It's never gotten physical, but it's gotten right there beneath it, the words that are being exchanged, the things that are being said. This is not new. This didn't come out of nowhere like this is. We've had those really hard moments where it's like, I cannot believe that you're my mom, and maybe at times she thought, I can't believe you're my daughter.

00:21:49
Speaker 2: I don't know, would you call her the beware back?

00:21:52
Speaker 3: I don't think that I've ever called her the bee word to her face until we got to Hawaii.

00:21:56
Speaker 1: Wow.

00:21:57
Speaker 4: Yeah, So at twelve years Olga mother says, I hate you as you guys were arguing, and as a twelve year old girl, that chips away at your at your confidence and the chips away at your ability. And again, I really the blessing of this conversation is because I think if people can can can not look at what happened on Basketball Wives, and I want you guys to just for a second, remove the altercation of basketball wives. And what I want people to really focus on right now is as a kid, and as I'm talking to you, you know what, it's so fascinating, Chatel. I can relate to you. I can relate to you. I can relate to you. And I'm not saying that to blow smoke up your ass am. I saying that beautful, comfortable. I've said this before my own podcast. I've had issues with my dad. We're past that now, but I know what it's like for a parent to say something to you. My father said to me I was subven, and he said, stop acting like a girl.

00:23:15
Speaker 2: And again I'm not called out my name, but as a little.

00:23:18
Speaker 4: Boy hearing that, that was the day I said to myself.

00:23:23
Speaker 3: Absolutely, you don't like me right there, you don't like me.

00:23:27
Speaker 4: And I was suvin and I was thirty five. So twenty eight years later, I took him aside and spoke to him about that. So for twenty eight years on it, I held on to it. I never forgot it, And for twenty eight years I lived my life thinking my father doesn't like who I am because I am a feminine boy. My sexuality has nothing to do with it is the fact that I mean eminem boy and him saying stop.

00:24:03
Speaker 2: Acting like a girl made me look at him differently.

00:24:08
Speaker 4: And I held on to that for twenty eight years until I said something to him and he said to me, I'm sorry. I didn't I didn't even realize I said that to you, and I apologize, And now I made him a good and refined I'm able to move forward. And I think for me, as I was watching the dynamic between and your mom, I knew, listen, I'm gonna be rip with you. I thought to myself, Okay, how deep is the pain? How deep is the pain? And what I'm realizing right now in this moment, it doesn't have to be the physical pain of being physically abused sexually abused. It doesn't have to be those those monumental like like black or white thing where we're like boom. It can be your mother at that time saying to you I hate you, yes, and things not ever.

00:25:04
Speaker 2: Really being the same. Does that make sense?

00:25:07
Speaker 4: No?

00:25:07
Speaker 3: Absolutely, And I think that in the back of my mind. I always held on to that, like even if I was able to walk away from that conversation, and you know, we move on and whatever, And here I am twenty years later, still feeling that way in the back of my mind, like you still feel some sort of way towards me, whether that's what for whatever your reasoning is, you have to hate me, because if you didn't, why would you treat me like this?

00:25:35
Speaker 2: This is reality with the King and I'm Carlos King. Let's get back into the show.

00:25:41
Speaker 4: Obviously, your sister will get down in a second. Your sister said, baby Chantale was spoiled. My mama looked paraphrase, of course, but it appeared that or what was said was you were the apple of Jackie's eye, were the one who got everything they wanted you. You were the one that they poured so much into and that you are a MENI Jackie yourself, is that something that you can acknowledge that you, out of all your siblings, you are the one that got the most or it was boil on.

00:26:20
Speaker 3: I won't stay out of all my siblings because me and my brother have the same mom and dad, right, and so for my sister, and I'm going to try to be not careful with my words because my truth is my truth, right, But I now understand that she doesn't want me to speak about her and her experiences, so I can speak on mine. Right. My sister has a different father and so not to in any way take away from her experiences. Right. But I have a daughter from a previous relationship, and now I have my son with my husband, and I know that for me personally, I go out of my way to ensure that they feel equal. I never want my daughter to be in this house feeling like, oh, Mommy and Noah and Duquan are sitting there on the couch and I'm off to myself. I don't play like that my kids are equal. It doesn't matter who your father is. I'm your mother, and this is what it is. So I think that a lot of what she may have felt came from the fact that you see mom and dad in this household, and no matter if my dad adopts you, no matter if he takes you under his wing, no matter all of these things, you still don't feel like this is really mine. You almost feel like an outsider in some ways. And so for me, I always felt like, how do I get us to be equal, or how do I get her to feel like she's just as much loved and adored as I am? You know what I'm saying. Like you see me having these great experiences with my father, I want you to have the same thing. So I can't tell you what her thought process was. I can't tell you what I'm thought process was. But for me, even if I did have the material things, I still felt just as my sister did. We was both left here with our grandmother. She didn't take me with her like our experiences. Maybe because yours are different, it doesn't change. It doesn't change that we were raised by the same mother. Do you get what I'm saying. So much of what you experienced I probably did too. It may have looked different for you because it is different for you, but that doesn't mean that you got this monster and I got this perfect mother. That's not what happened. Now, If that's what you if that's your experience, I understand that. But that wasn't my experience.

00:28:48
Speaker 4: And it goes back to what we say that children can live in the same household with their parents and have a different experience. And I think that's the case with you and your siblings when it comes see your father, Would you open up to your dad about how you felt about the things I've gone with your mom or you kept that too. Oh no.

00:29:08
Speaker 3: We just got to this point in like my late twenties where I finally started to really open up and be transparent with my dad and tell him because I started to see him as a person and not a parent. So because of that, I'm like, Okay, I could see where you were coming from when you didn't want me to do this or you didn't want me to do that. I started to relate to him more, and so I felt comfortable opening up. I felt comfortable saying yeah, like this is this is where I was at, or this is what I thought, or this is what I felt. And the difference and I'm not trying to compare them, but I'm speaking on my experience. The difference between my mom and dad is that he is very quick to take accountability, apologize, acknowledge, understand even if he doesn't agree right, And so then you have the polar opposite parent who is the no accountability And it's it's very hard to find that balance because on one hand, I don't feel safe to share this with you, and on the other hand, you're like my best friend. It's very hard to find that balance.

00:30:18
Speaker 4: I've been told through many psychiatrists and the many books that I read that for most girls, not all, but for most girls, your first bully is your mom. I have been told that when I say that, I'm not calling your mother a bully. What I'm saying is based on your relationship with your mother.

00:30:46
Speaker 2: And you said.

00:30:46
Speaker 4: Something so poignant earlier when you said, perhaps my mother did the best she could with the information she had of being a mom.

00:30:59
Speaker 2: Do you think mother intentionally.

00:31:03
Speaker 4: Wanted to treat you the way she treated you, or do you think, now being a mom, my mother did the best she could with the information she had.

00:31:16
Speaker 3: I think it's a bit of both. Honestly, I think that that is my truth, that I experienced a mom who maybe had no plans of being a mom, right, and this all kind of just fill into your lap, like maybe you didn't want to be a mom, but you're taking your responsibilities on. I don't know her backstory like that, or I haven't had these sort of layered conversations with her to understand where her mind was when she had my sister, when she had me, or when she had my brother. But I think that at times you didn't know any better, so you couldn't do any better. But then there are other instances where it's like, now you know you was dragging it right, like you know you was out of line. And because I can never have that sort of real, honest conversation where she just takes the mask off and she just says, you know what, this is the real right and meets me in this conversation with the desire to understand instead of attack or feel attacked. We can't really get anywhere because I'm telling you what my experiences are and you're telling me what maybe your intentions were, and we just can't We can't meet somewhere in the middle, you know what I mean. And that's how things start to really deteriorate and play out how they have.

00:32:36
Speaker 4: You were closer grandmother with is Jackie's mom growing up? What did you see in terms of how was Jackie's relationship this strange mother figure who you felt at the time, what was her relationship and dynamic Like with your grandmother who you cherish and just love so much.

00:32:58
Speaker 3: It wasn't bad. I think that she was. I think the only one in this life that I've witnessed outside of my dad, who really loved my mom unconditionally, like I know who you are, I know how you are, and I'm gonna love you through that. I'm gonna try to fix you in some ways, you get what I'm saying, Like, my mom is one of nine. My room had nine kids, and this is the one that you chose to live with help out. Do you get what I'm saying? Like there are still eight other children, But my mom was more so like I'm not gonna say the problem child, but I think that my grandmother knew she is the one that needs it the most, and so having her there, it was like she just picked up a lot of the slack. She just did all the things. You're cooking every meal, you're taking us to school, pickup, drop off, sitting in the parking lot sometimes like do you get what I'm saying? You're taking on you're being the mother for her, and whether that was you are enabling her to not step up to the plate as a mom, whether you feel like you're giving her the support that she needs for her own mental I don't know. And because my grandmother is no longer here, I can't really have that conversation and get that sort of clarity and understanding to be able to better understand, my mom, I don't have that.

00:34:23
Speaker 2: In this very moment, I have a light bulb moment.

00:34:28
Speaker 4: Maybe you recognize it in yourself and you have or maybe you have it. In this very moment, I have aha moment of if any black child grew up where their grandmother pretty much raised them, the moment your grandmother passed away, you lost her protector. Oh my gosh, you lost her protector. And I think, subconsciously, Chantelle, the moment the woman who you felt protected you was there for you, you love, the moment she passed away, you were now forced to deal with your mother alone, without that.

00:35:14
Speaker 2: Shield, without that shield.

00:35:16
Speaker 3: And at that point, I really felt like a motherless child. Even though my mother is here in the flesh. This woman that has raised me and taught me and picked me up when I was down and just been that safe, protective space for all of these years. Now she's gone and she's I mean, she passed away from cancer, like you know what I'm saying, so watching her deteriorate, and I was her caregiver for like the last year of her life. Like there were so many hurt feelings and just so much It was just so heavy for me, you know, what I mean. And I think that maybe my mom in her mind thought things would change between us, or maybe she I don't know, but I wasn't able to build a relationship with her at that point. Like I moved out at eighteen, And this is what people fail to realize about me. They think, like I've just been spoiled all my life. I moved out at eighteen and when got a job at Walmart because I wanted to be away from my mom. I didn't want to live off of her. I didn't want to be provided for and all these things that people think. When my grandma died, I was like, Okay, now I got to hit the ground running. I have to figure something out. And within a month I was a cashier at Walmart, name tag and all, and from there moved to North Stroum and assistant manager at Hustler Hollywood. And I've had a lot of odds and end jobs along the way to prevent depending on my mom and to prevent maybe having the tough conversation.

00:36:52
Speaker 4: I was just about to say, I don't think it was to prevent to prevent you from dealing with her. It's not prevent what you did, was chantel when your grandmother passed away and you're eighteen years old. Well, you don't realize you did, my love. You were escaping your mother. You ran away, You ran away from home.

00:37:16
Speaker 3: Oh no, for sure.

00:37:16
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying, Like you ran away. The fact that this woman who.

00:37:20
Speaker 4: I love is no longer here, Yes, and she's removed from the equation. I'm not forced and face to deal with that. And I can't deal with that because again, I relate to you so much because when my mom passed away, because I want the world to know that I now see you so differently now when my mom passed away, all nine, I have ten siblings, so I can relate to Jackie too. I have nine siblings. It's ten of us. All of us were extremely close to our mother. The moment our mother passed away, I'm not gonna speak for everybody. I'll speak for myself, just to be safe, because I don't need no drama in my family. The moment my mom passed away, I said, I have to talk to my father. Now we're fine, but I will call my mom and she'd be like, you know, she is your dad's birthday.

00:38:11
Speaker 2: Oh tell my seventy birthday? All right?

00:38:14
Speaker 4: Absolutely, Carlos blah blah blah blah, your father in the background. Oh time, I said, Hi. It wasn't until my mother passed away that I said to myself, I now have to develop a relationship with my father. When your grandmother passed away, you ran away because you did not want to deal with the heavy work. And it's heavy to all of a sudden at eighteen years old start a relationship with your mom. And you've been what you have done, Chantelle, which is no far of your own and you said it earlier. You are still a little girl inside processing your experience, and unfortunately you haven't been able to find the worst to articulate it, and you suppressed it and and your and your anger has manifested.

00:39:02
Speaker 3: Absolutely m I read a comment that said, Takari is sad and Chantelle is mad, and I said, preach, Clockey, preach, That's that's what you see manifesting people you because maybe because you don't see me crying and carrying on, you can't have any sort of empathy for me. Right you see the anger, and it's like, how could you? But if you don't understand my plight, be grateful for that. I've been through a lot of experiences in my life, and that doesn't excuse my behavior. It doesn't you you.

00:39:43
Speaker 4: You you hold full accountability absolutely for your behavior.

00:39:47
Speaker 3: Absolutely, when I got to that door, I could have and should have turned around and walked out of it one thousand percent when I when I seen in real life outside of these cameras, you're not going to take accountability. You're not gonna acknowledge what you've been doing all season long. Right now to the outside world, we both look like fools. I just need to go. I couldn't do that. I couldn't do that. For the first time in my life, I'm tote to told with who I feel like was my first bully, and I'm not backing down. I don't something in me just I was spiraling and that's what you see play out. I don't people think that because I haven't come out and said I apologize to my mom for this, is not that I think that I was right in the altercation or in what happened. There are plenty of instances and times during this season where I was wrong, where I could have removed myself, where I shouldn't have engaged. Absolutely, I understand that I'm not delusional, like I know it looks that way, and I get it, Like it's fear. You guys can only go off of what you see, Like you said, you know, I get it, But I know what a what I have experienced since the start of filming this show, And that's what I think that people fail to realize. When I'm on the show and I'm talking about her taking accountability and apologizing and so on and so forth, I'm talking about stuff that's happening right now at my big age at thirty two in Los Angeles, on these cameras, off these cameras I'm talking about right now in this season, I wasn't even talking about my childhood. Now, if we want to tell the backstory and you want to understand better how I kind of came to this place of not being super close with her, we can do that. But what I was searching for this season was not her to go back and say, you know what, I shouldn't have talked to you like that when you were a kid, I shouldn't have such and such. I wasn't. That was not what happened, and it did not come across that way on camera at all. So that's something that I have to live with. But because I know my truth and I know my intentions, that's the only thing that is keeping me afloat right now.

00:42:00
Speaker 2: So let's get into that. You've been on the show before.

00:42:03
Speaker 4: We've seen you a part of Basketball Guys a couple of times. This was the first time where Okay, Chantelle is low Kia full time cast member. When you got the call to join the show, did you know that, Okay, this is going to be an opportunity for me to work with my mom. Like, where were you and your mom's relationship when you got the phone call to join the.

00:42:28
Speaker 2: Show this season?

00:42:30
Speaker 3: We weren't in a bad space by any means necessary, But we also weren't close. We weren't besties. We weren't you know. I'm calling her and telling her my business. What I want people to understand is that I moved away from Sacramento and away from my mom when my daughter was two and a half years old. She's eight years old now, so me and Jackie have not been living in the same state for five years. We're talking over text, we have our phone. She'll send the kids Christmas gifts. That's the sort of interactions that we're having ever so often. I'll go to Sacramento. Obviously my dad, you know where he works. So Disney on Ice is coming to Golden One Center. I'm gonna take the kids, things like that. But me and my mom had not been in the same space for extended periods of time in years years. This is not somebody that I'm seeing and everything is great off camera and then I get on camera and I cod switch on you. That's not what happened. We were not locked in. We were not where we are now by any means necessary, or I never would have agreed to come and do the show. But I think that I had high hopes that I've been on this show before I had to sit down with Laura, I've had all the drama with other girls and all of these things. I can come on and show the growth I can show. Okay, like, no, we definitely don't have the best history. We definitely don't have you know, the we have a very checkered past. But we're moving forward. We're trying to move forward. So when my mom reaches out and the producers reach out, this is this is months in the making. And the first several times I said no, I'm a newlywed, I have this new baby, Like, I don't need this, respectfully, like I get it. Everybody said I did this for a check. I was. I appropriately compensated for my time. Absolutely, I wasn't gonna do it for free. But did I need this? No, my husband takes impeccable care of his family. So I didn't come on here for the sake of a check to embarrass Jackie. That's not the way that this played out. Y'all came and found me. I was in Arizona, out the way for years. I was never in the blogs. I was never in no drama. I was out the way for years. I was living a happy, peaceful life, letting my husband love on me, letting my kids build memories. And I was good. Y'all came and found me. I turned it down multiple times, and grow continued encouragement and petitions and so on and so forth from my mom. Oh, come on, Danna, we're gonna do this. It's gonna be great, it's gonna be positive. Come make your little money and go on about your business. I'm talking to my husband about him, like, what do you think he's like? I mean, I don't know, you know, you know same thing my dad said, you know how y'all could get I don't know if it's the best idea, but if.

00:45:21
Speaker 2: You your father wasn't even into the.

00:45:23
Speaker 5: Idem Wow, hell no, all right now, because he knows, like we don't have the best track record, we don't have the closest relationship, and he knows that we're both firecrackers in that way.

00:45:38
Speaker 3: He knows his child, and he knows I'm not going to back down. And once you take me to that point, I could give up about these cameras and anything else. I don't. I don't play like that. You can see in her previous interviews where she says, my daughter is a very private person. I begged her to be on this show, so I didn't. I wasn't looking for this, ye know.

00:45:56
Speaker 4: I interviewed your mom, of course, and she says, your mother said I but you said, like she reached out to get you on the show.

00:46:04
Speaker 2: Your mother hick con from that to me.

00:46:06
Speaker 3: So you brought me here to play in my face?

00:46:10
Speaker 2: That's how you felt, or do you still feel that way?

00:46:13
Speaker 3: I mean, we could get into the meat bones of what happened. Absolutely, that is what happened. You played in my face.

00:46:20
Speaker 2: Okay, So I'm a huge Basketball Wives fan. I watch every single episode. I'm a Basketball Wives historian.

00:46:30
Speaker 4: Okay, I saw you on the show, you and dre et Orlando that whole thing, and I saw you confront Evelyn about Jackie and the Jackie's like what you doing?

00:46:42
Speaker 2: You're like, Mom, I came down my weed.

00:46:45
Speaker 4: Stel intact, like everything's good, right, I'll trust me. Carlo's kigs are fed up of Wives. It's the greatest show bah one in my opinion. So we saw the top of the season. We see your mom be you know, adulting grandmother in the sense of, like, you know, having fun with you guys. But one thing that I still do not understand. And again us producer, I know that oftentimes a lot of things aren't shown, and I want you to have the ability to address it. What was the moment this season where you felt like things took a turn between you and your mom?

00:47:32
Speaker 3: The first scene.

00:47:36
Speaker 6: In the.

00:47:38
Speaker 3: Apartment apartment, Now, put your producer hat on. Follow me here.

00:47:44
Speaker 2: Now.

00:47:44
Speaker 3: Everybody is saying from the first scene that she came in, you act like you was on ten. You were so disrespectful. Understand something my mom met my son when he was seven months old. When she comes in the door and I say, oh, he got to warm up. That's meat for real, real as a mama bear. I'm not gonna put him in your arms for the sake of these cameras and have him on here howling and carrying on. I want him to be comfortable. I'm I set out when I when I signed up to do this show to really establish the real and reality TV. I understand that people have grown accustomed to seeing these women get on here and sit down and fight and argue and throw drinks and go to dinner and talk about the same thing. And I that wasn't what I signed up for. I'm gonna be my real, true, authentic self. Whoever likes it, likes it, whoever doesn't, that's okay too. So you're seeing these little you know, nuances or whatever in our relationship. This is our real dynamic. And I'm not gonna get on here and pretend for anybody here you go, here's grandma. I wasn't gonna do that. Why would I do that to this is my real son. This is not no prop baby.

00:48:52
Speaker 2: And how old would your son up the time of that scene?

00:48:54
Speaker 3: I was, I think nine months postpartum, so he was, Yeah, he was like nine ten months, so right in there.

00:49:01
Speaker 4: So your mother met yourselphabet part seven months? Was that the second time she was around?

00:49:09
Speaker 3: That was maybe maybe the third, right right within there. I think that that she had because obviously I had been in La in that apartment well before we started filming, right like a week or two or whatever. She had seen him on different occasions. But not, my mom is not picking up my son taking him to the park. This is not one of those sort of situations. You can come over and see him. You can come and visit, visit him, absolutely, like, that's not I'm not going to keep you from your grandkids, right, but you also don't have that sort of typical grandparent relationship with him, right you may she may have had that with my daughter because I lived in Sacramento at the time, So for the first two and a half years of her life, you are able to see her, you are able to have these great experience as a grandparent. But when it comes to my son, that wasn't the case. So fast forward, she comes in, she sits down, We're having our little you know talk, whatever she says, and I haven't said this publicly. She says, Banna, I don't mean to pry, but how are things with and insert my daughter's father's name. She says, how are things with Stacy? And I'm like, I know you fucking did, now mind you? Leading up to this, We've had multiple conversations that we will not talk about that on this platform. I'm in the thick of a custody battle. I'm going through a nobody out of my grandmother's nine kids. Nobody in our family has ever had any sort of custody court anything family wise. They always figured it out amongst themselves. So here I am in the middle of this very heavy, serious situation. You promised me that you are not going to talk about it. You promise me that you will not bring it up. And if somebody else brings it up, you could just get up and you could just walk away, don't engage, and you get in here in the first thing and you throw me under the bus. Now, as a producer, you know, we don't know what's gonna be used at this point. I don't know if they're gonna use it. I don't know if this is gonna get legs. I don't know if now they're gonna take this and say, Brandy, ask her about her daughter's father or such and such, asker about the court case. I don't know how this is gonna play out, but I know that you and I had multiple conversations leading up to the start of filming. We agree we would not talk about this. Understand, my daughter has her father, My sister has her father. Mom, you have a child from a previous relationship, just like I do. Do you want me to come in here and sit down and say, so, how are things with Tyrone? Have you talked to him lately? What is the drama like? That would have been so messy, that would have been so crazy and tacky on my part as your daughter. So you can do that to me, and I'm just supposed to eat it now. You and Dustin both said, she's very well versed at this. She knows what she's doing. She knows there are certain things that you just don't because you never know what's gonna be used. So in that moment that it clicks in my mind and I'm like, here's she go yet again. You're not protecting me. Now, you're taking me back to my childhood. Now I'm feeling exposed now I'm feeling naked now. I'm feeling like the very person that begged me to come here is gonna play in my face for what reason. I'm if we really get to the nitty gritty of things. Out of everybody on this cast, technically I am the basketball wife. My father played basketball, but he's a coach now. Nobody else on this cast is married to someone that is currently in the league. That's not me tooting my own horn. If we're talking about the title of this show, that's what it is. You had so much meat and bones and things. You could have talked about, what is life like with your husband living here and you live in there with the kids, and there's so much we could have talked about. Why would you come on here and bring up my daughter's father when you know the dynamic and you think that I'm not gonna feel some sort of way, you know me, So I didn't allow that to ruffle my feathers on camera. I gave her a very you know, diplomatic answer, just you know, we're trying to work through this as a family. Hopefully you know, the judge will approve the relocation and whatever. As best as I could wrap it up in that moment while my mind I'm spiraling, I'm like, this, lady did not just do this when we rap filming. I called my dad, I called my brother, I called my husband. I said, she's on some bullshit. She's on some bullshit. I don't know why she brought me here. I don't know why she would do that. And collectively they're all like what, there's no way she got on camera and said that. They did not believe me. I said, on my children, this is what she just got in here and said. And you know you're wrong, which is why you let it with. I don't mean to pride, but you're being messy. You are being so messy right now for what reason? There was a thousand things we could have talked about. If we're you guys sold me on the idea that you're trying to bring back basketball wives, you're trying to bring it back into the fold and talk about the things in the NBA and so on and so forth. Why are we not talking about that? What does my ex and whatever we have going on with my minor daughter have to do with right now today?

00:55:09
Speaker 4: Did you confront your mom after the scene was over?

00:55:12
Speaker 3: Absolutely? Are you serious?

00:55:17
Speaker 4: No?

00:55:17
Speaker 3: Banna I did, I said, Mom, So you mean to tell me that we haven't had multiple discussion. Well, I didn't know that. I was just saying it so I could just get it out the way.

00:55:28
Speaker 2: Because one thing that and this is me being rial with you.

00:55:31
Speaker 4: One thing that all of us collectively who watch the show and love your mom's personality on this show, is your mother knows your mother is a great reality star. Absolutely right. Yeah, so we know that your mother has ability to bring up stuff, or say stuff, or do stuff for the entertainment of the show.

00:55:51
Speaker 2: So in that moment, you felt like this, you're playing up for the cameras.

00:55:56
Speaker 3: You're planning up for the cameras with me, your blood daughter, who were supposed to be This storyline is that we are rebuilding and you know I'm living in the same building you're able to do. You get what I'm saying, like that is the plan, And then you come in here and you throw me under the bus like I'm one of your castmates. I don't really understand where you're coming from, got it? But now going forward, you still want my loyalty, You still want me to hold you in this high regard and paint this picture that everything is great between us. I'm not doing that. That's not what you're gonna get from me. But even still, even after that, there were still multiple scenes where I tried, I really just I'm just gonna fight the bullet. I'm just not gonna feed into it. I'm just gonna She had a photo shoot. I went and supported her. I wasn't. I didn't come on camera and melt down about that. I didn't say how dare you do that? I let it die in hopes that they're never going to use this, like maybe they just won't even pay it no mind and just go on right. But because this is my first go round as a cast member, I decided ultimately later on in the season to bring it into the fold and to say listen, so that there's nothing nobody can come and put no card down on the table for me. This is what I'm dealing with. I am going through custody case. I am trying to get approved of relocation. I do have judges and so on and so forth in my life. This is what's happening. Because I don't know what they're gonna use, but I know that you as the mega incredible reality star that you are you know the way that this game goes, So to do me like that, I just I really couldn't stomach it. And I think that that coupled with and this is also something that I've never talked about publicly, and I don't know if she will feel a way about me doing this. But off camera, on the way to Hawaii, Jackie tried to get Brandy to bring some tea about me from a mutual friend that they had a mutual friend that Jackie and Brandy had came to Brandy and said, I got some tea on Jackie's daughter. Now the tea was ice cold, he said, I was a Lisbie. I'm not, but I can go ahead and put that out there. She tried to get Brandy to bring it into the fold. Brandy told her no. At the airport on the boat scene where you see her sitting there, she tries to get Brandy to do it again. Now this time it's on camera and Brandy's yelling at her and we're like, what is going on in Brand's going no, Jackie, I'm not doing it. No, Jackie, I'm not doing it. After the fact, it's shared with me that, yeah, she wanted me to bring this tea about you to the show. Oh so you're playing a really dirty game right now, and because you've been doing this so long, you know I'm gonna get her to the point of no return. She's gonna give this season all she's got because she really don't have no filter and she really don't care about these cameras, and she really doesn't I'm not articulate in that way. Maybe I'm well spoken, but when I'm mad, I'm mad. I'm not finna sit here and play with nobody. I get that that's what y'all like to do, but I don't like to do that. I told Brandy that in Vegas, everybody don't play like that. I know that that's what you guys are used to, but I don't play like that. So maybe this isn't the platform for me. Maybe this isn't the space for me because I'm not about to play with y'all. That's not Listen. Once you guys finally see as the viewers me get to Hawaii. Now, I have you bringing up my daughter's father. I have you trying to bring messy t via Brandy to this platform. I have later on in the Hawaii trip, you telling Jennifer that you would have grandparents' rights to my kids. Now, how messy is that of you to say when you know that I'm in court right now. All of these things are coming at me and I'm still sitting here trying to take it, like, do not take it there with this, lady, I don't care how you feel. I don't care. Like I made a promise to myself, to my husband, to my children, to my father before I came on this show. I'm not gonna get on here and show my ass. I'm not gonna do it. I've watched you do it season after season. I don't want to go along with that narrative. I don't want people to say, oh, the Apple dom far far from the tree and everything that they've been saying about me. Now, I never wanted this, but I'm also not gonna let nobody play in my face. So if that means that this is what I have to wear and y'all don't understand where I'm coming from, that's okay. That's okay with me because I know what led up to this point, and the cast members and castmates and producers and so they all saw it in real time. So if you want to come out now at this point and offer Jackie an apology because of the way that this fight was relayed. I understand it and I respect it, But to say that y'all didn't see in real time what she was doing to me on and off camera, this has been a tough pill to swallow. Man, this is crazy.

01:01:10
Speaker 4: So it sounds to me, again going back to the dynamic between you and your mom, it sounded to me like, like.

01:01:19
Speaker 2: You said earlier, the little girl.

01:01:21
Speaker 4: Resurfaced again when your mother caught you off guard by bringing us something on camera that you two talked about not bringing up absolutely and then obviously your mother allegedly hearing something told Brandy bringing up Branny said, no, Brandy tells you. Is that when you started to unravel and the loyalty was gone? Because is that when you started to say, well, Brandy, Jackie said, it's about you.

01:01:47
Speaker 3: Well, what people don't understand and they always say, well, why didn't you protect her when Brittany was going in on her. I'm not protecting nobody. That's not protecting me. This whole time that we're here in Vegas, you're on the phone with me when we're not filming. I wasn't staying at the house. I got a house separate from them so that I could be with my kids. I brought them to Vegas. You're on the phone with me between these scenes. Yeah, because Brandy this and Brandy that. You're talking down on her, no matter what you said, I don't even have to repeat what you said, right, But then you get on camera and you're grabbing Brandy by the hand. Sis, I know you've been dealing with a lot, and I know now that shit is rubbing me the wrong way. You're playing a very dirty game. If you don't want to get in between it, then don't get in between it. There's eight other women here that you could talk to, but you want to sit here and buddy up to Brandy when you already know I feel some sort of way about this person. Why Because if the roles was reversed and I did that, if this was last season when Evelyn called you whatever she called you and brought up whatever she brought and I was doing that with her, you would feel some sort of way. But I'm behind the scenes telling you, yeah, that's real tacky of her, and I just can't. You're playing a very messy game and maybe you weren't prepared for somebody that really knows you to come on here and work alongside of you. And maybe when you offered me, or you brought this opportunity to my door, you weren't prepared for the way that I was coming. But anybody that knows me knows I really do not play like that. I don't play for these cameras. I could honestly care less about any of I could have been ducked off living on a farm. I wasn't bothering nobody. What did you bring me here for? Just to do this? So now I've become one of your castmates, and you're willing to throw me under the bus and do me dirty like you're willing to do everybody else. But you want me to show you loyalty. You want me to stand up for you because you and Brittany got into it. No, I'm actually not going to do that, because, respectfully, she's the only one spoke up for me and said anything. Whether I met her ten minutes ago or I've known her ten years, that's who spoke up for me. Why are you so mad at her? You're getting defensive because now now you see somebody else that's not just your daughter that's saying this. Now, somebody that don't really know neither one of y'all like that, is saying, Jackie, something's wrong with this picture. I don't really like what's going on here, and and now you want to jump over couches and carrying on. But you can sit here with the same person who Now mind you to give you a bit of backstory on the Brandy thing. People say that I started poking at her what they didn't show you guys when we were in that room and I said this to me, I said this to Denise and whoever I think baby Evelyn was in the room. I said, I'm gonna ask Brandy personally when we sit down at the dinner table, like what's t why, Like why would you invite Jennifer here when you know her in Evelynce dynamic. Now I get everybody saying, well, why would you get in it? You didn't know we're filming a TV show. If I don't say nothing, y'all gonna say, Oh, you're sitting there quiet as a church bouse. Do you get what I'm saying? You damned if you don't. Yes, I'm saying I set out my mouth. I'm gonna ask Brandy directly. I'm not sitting here being messy with y'all. That's not what I'm doing at all. I think it's crazy that she did that. I'm going to ask her directly. Before I had the opportunity to do that, Brandy comes barreling around the corner with all the smoke for everybody in the room. I get it you feel some sort of way, you feel like we was around the corner talking about you. But as for me, I said I was going to ask you directly. You just didn't give me that opportunity to So once we all make our way out to the living room, the only person out of everybody that was in the room you have smoke for is me because I asked a very logical question, why did you invite her here? Is this not the same thing that you did last season when you invited Jackie to Brooks event. So you do have a track record of doing this, and I am asking you what's up? But I didn't go picking with her. And regardless if in that moment my mom wants to see that I can hold my own I can. If this is on an audition for you, and you just sitting there. She's sitting there with a water bottle full of Titos like this, watching like everybody else. Okay, you don't have to say nothing. You don't have to insert yourself. You don't got to ask Brandy what her issue is or why she got all this smoke for me and nobody else. Maybe this was my freshman hazing, and y'all wanted to see how I would handle it. I don't care what they showed on that episode. I handled myself very well. I get how it was cutting spliced together, but I think that we walked away from there with everybody on the same page that Okay, ain't go back down like I'm not gonna hold you. That was the general consensus. You understand, Oh, I totally understand.

01:06:34
Speaker 4: Listen, when I look at basketball, Yes, the reason why it's such an interesting subculture amongst other reality shows is because to me, it is about.

01:06:45
Speaker 2: This very unique, you know, organizing.

01:06:52
Speaker 4: Subculture principle to where we're all in some form of fashion can relate on being associated, past or present of athletes, and it is sort of like I listen, I'll say, I do feel like by proxy of just the show, right, it's nobody's thought of it's all. I think it's a subculture of basketball lives. Newbies get hazed. I think that's what it is. And again, I've watched the show since day one. I think that's just the nature of the show. I can see your point being like everybody like, well, this little bitch can handle her all and cheers of the girls weekend like bitch.

01:07:28
Speaker 3: Okay. So now we work our way through the Now, mind you, we're in Vegas for several days. Over the course of the breakfast the next morning, Brandy's making little comments. You see, I'm laughing. I'm not really feeding into it because I'm not even gonna take it there because I can I can already see now. I know that behind the scenes, Brandy has already kind of established chantell No, I'm just playing, right, She know I'm not real right, No, I don't know that you're not playing. I think that you're dead serious. And now every time I see you, I have a problem like That's That's how I'm feeling in that moment. Obviously, later on throughout the season, I was able to talk to Brandy and kind of get a better understanding of her, and we just acknowledge. You're a may Gemini, I'm a June Gemini, and we just say it's just oil of water. You get what I'm saying. But I think that the picture that was painted, and I can understand how viewers took this from the scenes, is that I'm telling her that I'm telling my mom, don't say anything on my behalf, just be quiet. That actually isn't what I said. I said I can handle myself.

01:08:35
Speaker 1: I can.

01:08:36
Speaker 3: I mean no, like, I can take care of this. It's not a problem. Like you don't even got to wory about it. You don't even if you don't want to do it on your own, you don't have to ask me for permission.

01:08:44
Speaker 4: Right.

01:08:45
Speaker 3: You see her coming for me for no apparent reason. And I think where the lines get blurred is that people are saying, well, you put boundaries in place. I put boundaries in place for things like her not telling my personal business. I put boundaries in place for her not showing up to my apartment all hours the day and night, coming in like that. Those are the boundaries I'm speaking of. This has nothing to do with this lady that you've known for all of these years. Keep coming for me for no apparent reason. You're sitting within arm's reach of this lady, you sharing this bread basket like you are sending me. You are infuriating me at this point, because why are you You just got off the phone calling you If you don't want to involve yourself, don't involve yourself. But don't sit here and fake kiss Brandy's ass on this camera and make me look crazy. If this is how you feel about Brandy, just hold that. There's eight other women here, mean Ti, Denise, Brittany, Evelyn, Shawnee that you could talk to, pick with, converse with, et cetera. Why are you going for the person that you know I feel some sort of way about, and that, according to you off camera, you feel some sort of way about. But I look crazy. No, No, we're not We're we're not gonna do that' gonna do that. So then to get to the lounge, where she eventually jumps over the couch. As soon as I walked into the scene, she grabbed Brandy's hands. She says, Sis, you know I wanted to bring us all here tonight because you know, I know that you've been going through a lot that if you see my face, yeah, I'm like, I know you ring like, I get that this is a show. I get you've been doing this for so long and everything. But if this is how you were gonna play, why did you call me here? You could have done this with any of the other girls. Why would you bring me here knowing that our relationship is not the best already? Did you think I was gonna feed into it? Did you think that I had changed overnight and that I had become someone that was going to play right along with you? You know I'm not, so.

01:10:51
Speaker 4: It was it was challenging for you to I now have a greater understanding of this. On one end, your mother and you know her, yes, and you know the actions, the mannerism and all that of your mom, plus the conversations you guys are having on camera, and then once the camera's on, you're seeing a very different person courtesy of what you're saying to me off camera isn't matching things on camera. And because you're like, I'm here to be my authentic self, you're leaving their confused and you just don't know how to navigate through this. And then all of this, obviously has been a built up from the first scene bring up, your estranged relationship with your daughter's father, and then everything just sort of like piled up, piled up, piled up, and you probably felt like you were in the twilight zone. I was.

01:11:47
Speaker 3: I was spiraling now, mind you, I'm nine months postpartum at this point, I'm going through postpartum depression. I'm dealing. I had so much on me and that does in no way excuse my behavior. But I'm hoping that that this interview will help people better understand where my mindset was. It didn't just happen overnight. We're filming over the course of several months, through the holidays and everything else, and at every turn you're taking the opportunity to play in my face. And never once off camera did you come to me and just say, you know what, I was dead wrong, like I apologize, I'm gonna do better going forward. Never, not once did she ever tell you like girl that's TV show. No, Brandy the only one that told me that. So it was very hard for me to accept. And I think that when I finally get to Hawaii and I'm coming in on ten and I'm asking her, did you call me impressionable? That came from Vegas? The whole cast and production. Everybody else is staying in the same house. When these cameras are not rolling, there are a lot of conversations that happen off camera. You guys are all conjoined in here in this living room talking about these scenarios, and you're telling this group of women who don't know me and these produce well, yeah, you know, because Shanny, she's very impressionable, and so you just gotta, you know, kind of just keep an eye out, basically hold on out. Of all of your kids, you know that I'm the least impressionable. You're saying things that you know are going to send me off. And if that was you wearing your producer hat and hoping to get good TV.

01:13:25
Speaker 4: Here we are when your mom kept leaving seen by seeing by seeing by scenes off. No, I don't know. I'm just I'm asking because again, even on my recap, and I'm glad you watched it, I kept saying, I'm only going to base this recap off of what you say what I saw, because I the beauty of my podcast is I am a producer and I know that you can't show everything. So I kept saying what I'm seeing with Jackie is every time the conversation is about her daughter, she walks up to leave.

01:14:03
Speaker 2: Was that just to play the audience, you think?

01:14:05
Speaker 3: Or one thousand percent? And that's why when I released my statement, I said, this was a masterclass in narcissism. You are dealing with someone who has been doing this for the past decade. She is very good at her job. That's why so many people love her. I don't take that away from her. You are a mega reality star in every shape and fashion you are when you think of basketball wives, you think of Jackie Christy. I will never take that away from her. But because you have been doing this long enough, I know that you know what you're doing. On top of the fact, you're taking a page out of my book in the previous seasons that I haven't been on, and you're calling me after the fact, I'm giving you this advice, Mom, if you just get up and walk away from there, they'll just be sitting there screaming in an empty room. Just get up and walk away from the table. And now you're gonna wait till I get on here and use my advice against me. Oh, Carlos, I was spiraling. I'm not even gonna hold you watching that back, I'm like, girl, you was melting down. You was just you were just I was just losing it because I just couldn't believe, like you really gonna get on here and play, and out of all of the years, you never get up and walk away. Everybody knows you are willing to engage. You're gonna throw French fries, drinks, whatever, You're gonna sit here and do this back and forth all day. But now that you know, wait a minute, I got to write where I want her. She's so mad, she ain't gonna be able to articulate herself. She's gonna be sitting here spot. I'm just gonna get up and walk out.

01:15:27
Speaker 4: I took that as I'm not gonna give the audience a moment between me and my daughter. Okay, well that's so you're saying that that was because that's how we all took it. We all took it that she is walking away from the audience seeing.

01:15:42
Speaker 2: A dispute between mother and daughter. That's how we took it.

01:15:45
Speaker 3: If in your heart you really do believe that, why do you keep coming back to film? If you know that I'm gonna be here and you know that this is gonna be the topic. If you really felt like, I'm not engaging in this in any way, shape, fashion, or form. I'm not gonna discuss me and my child and so on and so forth, why do you continue to engage? Why do you continue to come and show up? Never once did you say, if Shanny's gonna be there, I'm not going to be there. If this is going to be the topic of discussion, I'm not filming. You can pull your trump card. You can be that one. You have earned that position on this show to be able to call the shots and kind of say how you want things to go. Now. You may not be executive producer, but you are Jackie Christie. You showing up just like I'm showing up. But I'm the one that looks crazy because you get me right to that point where I start to ask the very logical questions and you know where I'm going with this. Did you call me impressionable when we were in Vegas? Was you talking about Brandy? She knows I'm a very logical person. I'm going to ask, and I know everybody was eating me up because I used rhetorical wrong. I did, I did. I definitely did watch it back I said, well, I didn't go to college, so.

01:17:00
Speaker 1: I got that ate me up.

01:17:02
Speaker 3: Okay, I'm sorry, I need to do better next time. But the point is that because you know that you've got me to this point of like's not she knows me in a lot of ways, right, you know that I'm not going to be able to properly articulate myself because now I'm mad. Now I'm not worried about story. I'm not worried about buttoning this up. I'm not worried about explaining it to the viewers. Now I'm just looking at you, mother to daughter, like, are you serious? Right now?

01:17:36
Speaker 2: I now have a greater understanding of all of this. I don't know why all of.

01:17:44
Speaker 4: A sudden this hit me too, which is strange, but it just has your mother, your birth mom.

01:17:52
Speaker 2: This is your mother where you two have had a very complicated relationship.

01:17:57
Speaker 4: You're now on a shove where your mother, as you have admitted, your mother is the Lesiondary one of the greatest reality stars of all time. Because to be a reality star icon there is a certain level of experience where you're able to know cameras on move a certain way.

01:18:18
Speaker 2: And I now understand that I have no idea whatever.

01:18:22
Speaker 4: Feel like if a daughter comes on her mother's platform that she has excelled at from day one, and you're in, yes.

01:18:31
Speaker 2: I played here and there.

01:18:32
Speaker 4: Of the seasons we did that, boom boom, But this is a full time job.

01:18:36
Speaker 2: You asked me to do it. I'm trying to like have a real moment.

01:18:40
Speaker 4: With you, and I now understand why you felt like at that time, I'm being played. And when your mother is sitting down and she's like trying to talk to you, I now understand that for you, right or wrong. I'm not here judging you or your mom, but I now understand as you're sitting down wanting to have a real conversation with your mother, your mother getting up was away in your mind at that time.

01:19:13
Speaker 2: You're playing in my face and you know this is going to get me to.

01:19:17
Speaker 3: React, and you know that this is going to send me off. You are literally And the thing is that this She didn't get up and walk away one time, This was multiple times repeatedly in Hawaii. Now off camera and on camera, all of the castmates are saying the same thing. That's messed up. As a mother, I wouldn't do that before any fight happened. You guys are acknowledging in real time what is wrong with this that you you don't want to be held accountable or you don't want to have real conversations, so you're choosing to get up and walk away. Before I got to the point of speaking to her so disrespectfully on that last night in Hawaii, I was actually very calm. I know it may not translate that way on camera. It may be sliced different. I approach these conversations very calmly. I started asking very logical questions because I'm just trying to understand why are you doing this? You have all of these women sitting here at this table that you could play this game with. Why are you doing this with me? And do you understand how far this can really go? Maybe in her mind she thought this is best case scenario. Me and my daughter can go back and forth. We can have our little stat and it's never going to go further than that, not at thirty two, not as a wife and a mother.

01:20:32
Speaker 4: Of my own, but also not with and I'm gonna say this also, not with the built up, unhealed aggression that you have. And I think that's the missing piece of everything what I want. And again, I'm not here to defend you to the picture, mom. I'm here to have a real conversation and really extract what you're given to me because I now see things very differently. I now understand as an unhealed woman, Yes, who's on a show?

01:21:00
Speaker 2: Your mother? Who is the face of that shell? To me? Who plays that game perfectly? Your mother's a legend in the game. Yeah, she's amazing.

01:21:11
Speaker 4: I now understand how an unhealed daughter can recognize that and feel confused.

01:21:17
Speaker 2: And now as we.

01:21:18
Speaker 4: Were in Hawaii and you guys are in your mother's hotel room. When you walked into that room, Chantelle, what was your sole intention that you wanted to get.

01:21:31
Speaker 2: Out of that conversation with your mother.

01:21:34
Speaker 3: I didn't go in there really with any intention. You have to understand that the confrontation that happened in the hotel room came right after sitting down on the terrace and I had on the black suit. And she walked away and said, you know, when the when the teacher is ready or whatever, the student will appear, whatever it is. And she said, I know she was. She was reading that before she walked in that scene because she wanted to come across very poised and like in exactly how she came across. You understand what I'm saying. I know that this was prepared in her mind. So when I went up to the room, I'm like, girl, what you got for me today? Like I've already mentally checked out in my mind because you're playing. You don't want you called me up here to literally play into whatever narrative it is that you want these viewers to go with and send me on my way. We're not gonna get to any real resolution here. We're not gonna get to the nitty gritty of how we got to that point this season. So when she's asked me, well, baby, what is it and everything that you and Destin were saying? You're not asking me because you really want to know, you know what happened you were here. I'm not talking about my childhood. I'm talking about right now on this season today. Well, we weren't cool before this. I don't know, you tell me were we called before this? Because if we were so cool, why would you do that to me? It's not adding up And now I am spiraling. Now I do feel crazy. Now, I do feel all of these things because what.

01:23:03
Speaker 4: No, So when she said get up and leave, and that's a much better exit.

01:23:11
Speaker 3: Again, you're in your producer role. You don't care that I'm your daughter. You don't care that I'm really for real upset in real life. You don't care all of the things that you've done to me leading up to this. Now you're sitting here and you're producing this scene. That's a much better exit. M M okay, sweetie, Like, yeah, I am saying things to her, but do you not realize that she's saying things back like ming said out of her own mouth, Jackie cannot be bullied. I was not bullying her. I treated her in a way that watching it as as a daughter, I shouldn't correct. I understand that. But this person is not innocent. She's not sitting here like this meek mother. That's like, why would you do this to me? Why are you treating me like this? You playing in my face like I'm a stranger in the streets. So I'm treating you the same way. Why do I have to treat you? Why do I have to parent the parent? Why do I have to treat you with more respect than you give me? I understand now, through months of healing and therapy and all these things that I have a burden to be better. I understand that now, But in that moment, oh lady, oh my god, I just that was just a really that was a really heavy night for me. That was a really dark time. And I know that I didn't come to that place out of nowhere, and I didn't go into that scene. I didn't even come onto this season with the intent to embarrass Jackie, to trick her out or spot all these things that people are saying. That was never my intention.

01:24:41
Speaker 2: Calling her Jackie. That's y'all thing, Yes, okay.

01:24:44
Speaker 3: Which is why I'm like, now, mind you, y'all want to pick and choose me and get on live. And she call her mom VICKI and don't nobody blink twice. But when I called Jackie Jackie, No, I call Jackie Jackie. At Christmas time, I called this just that's just our like, it's that's all child. Yes, it's never been in a disrespectful way. I understand watching that. It's like, oh, she was yellinger and she called her Jackie. I answered the phone when we on good term, Jackie, what is it now, Like that's just our Okay, I want to.

01:25:16
Speaker 4: I'm my girl, Okay, so obviously listen when I when I saw the moment of you and your mother's altercation, and I'm being very honest with you, and I even said this on my recap, I felt awful. I felt awful as a viewer watching that because it was something like, I don't want to see this. I don't want to see this. I felt that way as a viewer in that moment. Of course, people are saying, Chantelle, you deserve it. You pushed your mother, and people are missaying, Shantail, your mother should have done worse to you when that happened, when you're mother, and I want to, I want did she make contact with you?

01:26:04
Speaker 3: She didn't. She pushed me into the camera like she bawled up her fists and kind of tried to like she was aiming for my head. But because I ducked out the way I fell into the camera, man, that's how the finger ended up bleeding. Like it wasn't. There was no real contact that was made other than her pushing me into the camera. Her intention was to probably sack me in between the washer and dryer or whatever day on here to stand. But that's not the way that that happened. It didn't land I wasn't as you see in the next scene, like nothing, it didn't happen.

01:26:36
Speaker 2: Then why did you go back and tell the girl she hit you?

01:26:39
Speaker 3: I think that for me, and what I want people to understand is I can see how it looks like I was a liar when I left that scene and I went back down there and I explained to the women what happened. This is fifteen twenty minutes after this altercation with my mom. Now, should I have left that room and went to my own Absolutely, that should have been the end of it. Right. But as a producer, I think you can understand sometimes when you're in the moment and you're we're filming this show with you got the mic on, like you're trying to kind of complete this story, if that makes sense.

01:27:13
Speaker 2: No, with us, listen, things get cloudy and and again, I'm just being real.

01:27:17
Speaker 4: And that's why it's the beauty of this podcast, because I am a producer. Anytime a big altercation happened on any of my shows, right, what I need y'all to understand is cast member called to ask for a play by play because things happen so fast that you don't remember things, and sometimes you just it happened so fast. So I will say this, and I'm not making no excuses. As a producer from Pillow Talk on Land of Housewives, all the girls called me and said what happened? To love and to hip hop? They all call me be like, now, what really went down?

01:27:49
Speaker 2: Because it is cloudy? So I will say that does happen yet?

01:27:53
Speaker 4: So at that moment, did you feel like when you walk back and told them she hit me? Is because you thought she hit you? Or did did the memory of the she didn't make contact with you?

01:28:05
Speaker 3: Like?

01:28:05
Speaker 2: What was?

01:28:06
Speaker 3: I think it was all very blurry for me, And I think that I led with she swung on me, yes, I And I think that that it morphed into she really put her hands on me because I was just I was just in disbelief that you really balled up your fists and tried to aim for my head like I was a stranger in the streets simply because I pushed you off of me. And I feel like that's what the viewers are. They're being wilfully ignorant in this way. You put your hand on my elbow knowing that I'm upset, whether you were trying to usher me out the room or not, whether I should have left out the door or not. As my mother, you know that I'm upset. You know that touching me is going to send me off. You're trying to not sun me, but you're trying to come on, let's get Do you get what I'm saying? And because I've already made up at my mind that this is the game that you're playing, and this is the narrative that you're going with, like don't like watch out, don't do that? You get what I'm saying. I see now how that push looks like, well, girl, you started in and you deserve everything that was coming to you. That is not how I felt in that moment, and that's still not how I feel today. Should I have pushed her, Absolutely not. I will never I don't want my kids to put their hands on me. I do I want my kids to treat me that way?

01:29:21
Speaker 2: No?

01:29:22
Speaker 3: But will I do to my kids what my mom has done to me?

01:29:25
Speaker 2: No?

01:29:26
Speaker 3: So I guess we'll never know. But I know that in that moment, I felt like, don't touch me, like you hear me say, don't touch me now, whether or not y'all want to acknowledge that her hand was on my elbow, whether or not you want to acknowledge that I'm upset and I'm angry, and I'm just you can see that I'm spirally. Never once did she say, you know what, cut the cameras, this is enough. Nothing you're playing into this too. Never once did you say all bets are off, this is enough. We both could have said that, and neither one of us did. I know my reason for it, because in my mind, at this big age, I'm finally standing up to this person that I have all of this anger towards. I'm not backing down. If that means that this has to be here on this stage in front of all these people, I don't care, because I know that I'm confronting this problem in my life for once. But for you, who clearly you take this as a game, you could have removed yourself from this situation, you sitting here on the couch, scrolling on your phone, waiting for the next showdown. But I'm the problem because a lot of us, in specifically black households, are raised to believe or are raised on the belief do as I say not as I do. Have respect for your parents at all times. It doesn't matter what they say what they do. I think that there's a new generation of kids and adults that are coming and that are happening that are not going for that anymore. I need to respect you because you're my parent, but you have got to give me something to respect. Why do I have to respect you just because of your title mother, father, sister, brother, cousin, husband. It does I'm not going to accept anybody else's toxic behavior simply because of their title. I'm not doing it if that means that I'm a messed up person. If that's how y'all want to view me, I'll be okay. The sun will rise tomorrow. I'm gonna get Up'm gonna take my kids to school. I'm gonna make my husband like I'm gonna go on about my life because I know my truth and I know my intentions. If I had came on here with the intent to embarrass her, to out her, to talk down about her, et cetera, maybe I would feel embarrassed or like, damn, like she really foiled my plans. Everybody's saying, oh, you came on here with the intent to embarrass your mom and you failed. I didn't fail. I free myself.

01:32:00
Speaker 2: They didn't fail.

01:32:01
Speaker 3: This wasn't the goal. But I addressed a dragon in my life, and I can walk away from the situation knowing that I handled it the best I could. And until you're in that situation, you cannot tell me how to feel. You really can't. What people fail to realize, and I shared this with some of the girl's off camera, is that when I was twenty seven, I've always had really bad migraines and headaches. I went to the doctor, I got MRIs and all these scans and the neurologists came back with you have an aneurysm on the right side of your brain. This is something that obviously my parents are aware of. I've told all of my close loved ones, like, you know, if something ever happens to me, like it could be that you just never know. Like so for me one, we know that I've tried for the last five years to live a very stress free life. That's why I was out there the way. So why wasn't in nobody's blogs. That's why I wasn't doing I was just out the way, living a very peaceful life. You brought me here, you stress me to the point of disbelief, and then you aim for my head. Yeah, I'm not gonna wear what they're putting on me. I'm not gonna do that, Carlos. I'm not. If that means that they feel like I'm not taking accountability or whatever, that's okay with me. I take accountability for where I went wrong. Maybe I never should have gone up to the room when she asked for the conversation. Undoubtedly I should have walked out the door when I was standing at it. I understand that. But nobody can tell me how to handle pain that they have not experienced. It is a different, triggering, crazy circumstance to be in. When you're in it, it's so easy to sit there, turn on a TV every Monday. Oh, she's so disrespectful to her mom. Oh how is she acting like this? Why is she acting like this when you don't know the backstory, when you already have in your mind that this is the fan favorite that we riding with Jackie, right or wrong. I see all of these comments that say, but that's still your mother. So let her do anything she wants to me. Let her bring up things that she promised she wouldn't. Let her try to get some random guy that I've never even met to bring some tea about me to this show, let her talk about grandparents, writes, When she knows that I'm in the middle of this case, at what point do you say?

01:34:44
Speaker 2: You know what?

01:34:45
Speaker 3: Enough is enough? Now? The difference is everybody is telling me, well, you should have just walked away.

01:34:52
Speaker 2: Duh.

01:34:54
Speaker 3: I know that, But this was a very real situation that y'all watched lay out. This was not made for TV. This was not something that I did for a check. She did for a check. I don't even think she knew that that was gonna happen like that. I think in her mind she thought, maybe she'll just remove herself from this in general, that's what she told the producers at Vegas. I don't even think that she's gonna continue with this show because she knows. I don't get down like this. I don't play these games. I'm not at that place in my life. Even if at one point I was messy, even if at one point I came on and talked to Lauria, even if at one point I had my drama Withdrea, I'm not at that space in my life anymore. So, why are you pushing me to this point? And now you light this fire and then you walk away and you leave me standing here holding the matches.

01:35:48
Speaker 2: Have you and your mother spoken since that night? No? And how long ago did that incident happen?

01:35:57
Speaker 3: Probably about seven months, six or seven.

01:36:00
Speaker 2: You haven't spunk to your mother in seven months. Your mother's birthday was past weekend. Did you reach out? Did you reach child? Has she reached out to you?

01:36:15
Speaker 6: No?

01:36:15
Speaker 3: She has mentioned through way of my brother when all of this happened, she basically asked him, you know, does she want me to come out and make a statement?

01:36:26
Speaker 2: And I when the show after the episode air.

01:36:29
Speaker 3: After the episode aired, she sent word through my brother. Does she want me to come out and basically stand up for her? Like I see that everybody's bullying her and so on and so forth. Does she want me to say something? And I said, no, one, if that's not at the top of your mind, you shouldn't have to ask for permission to do that. If you see that people are wishing death on me and my family, and they're talking about the way my son looks, and they hope that my daughter's dad wins custody and all of this wild stuff. And you see this in real time, and you yourself have been in my shoes this first several seasons. People called you an instigator, messy, all of these things. You've been there, so you know how this feels. And now this is a very real situation with this this mother daughter wound that is literally gaping open, and in your mind, you no, you don't have to speak on my behalf. I can speak on my behalf because even if you did come out and say something, it's not going to be the truth. You're not gonna take accountability for what happened. You're not going to acknowledge that you push me to this point. You're not gonna say that my anger was justified. Maybe my actions weren't, but my anger was. You're not gonna acknowledge that. You're gonna leave me standing out here holding a bag looking like this terrible, disrespectful, horrible daughter.

01:37:50
Speaker 2: And that's okay. How does your father feel about what happened?

01:37:59
Speaker 3: I think that he is trying to prossess some very heavy feelings. I think that he is at a point in his life where all of these great things are happening. You know, he has this new opportunity as a head coach, and so any conversations that I have had with him have really just been him keeping me encouraged and telling me that you know, I know your heart, like I know that you're not this person that people are making you out to be. I know that this was a long time coming. When I talked to him after the Hawaii thing happened, I said, Dad, you know our dynamic. You know that this is not I didn't get on here with the intent to do this. And so I think that having his understanding and knowing that he knows our history is very reassuring. And I think that what people get misconstrued, and I've seen all sorts to sick comments like I'm such and such from ease by you and I want my dad and all of this, and that what they fail to realize is that he has been my protector in times that I needed one. He has been that source of relief when things in the house are too heavy or whatever. He will remove me from the situation before I get to the point of disrespecting her. You understand what I'm saying. So I look to him anything that comes to her. I'm going to my dad about it, period, because you know what it is that I'm dealing with, and I feel like if nobody else can get you together.

01:39:39
Speaker 2: I now get it.

01:39:41
Speaker 4: Every time you would bring up doug and you would some calling my father, you feel like your father is the only one who understands Jackie Christy.

01:39:55
Speaker 2: And is the only one that can that can check her.

01:39:58
Speaker 4: Yes, Yes, absolutely so that because because I think in your mind you feel like my mother has full.

01:40:05
Speaker 2: The world and has audience and I can. But this man not only.

01:40:11
Speaker 4: Can hold you accountable, he knows that what I'm saying is the gospel. That he knows who he's married to. And that's the reason why you kept bringing your father's name. A lot of people And listen, you don't have to answer this. If you don't want to, you can tell me that's whatever. A lot of people were not happy with you as well when you did say that's why that's why Dougie's leaving you.

01:40:31
Speaker 2: Would you like to address that.

01:40:35
Speaker 3: What I can say about that is it's not my place to speak on anybody else's marriage. It was very, like I said, tacky and tasteless and was clearly just when I watch myself say that. I'm like, girl, now you know that you didn't have to take it to him. You did not have to take it that far. That's just not that's that is one regret that I do have out of the entire season. That is the one thing that I regret because I just I didn't have to say that. I could have kept it right where it was at. You get what I'm saying, Like, but I'm spiraling like at this point now, I'm just.

01:41:17
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, you wanted to hurt her obviously. Yeah. Have you heard from Sean O'Neil since the incident happened the episode? Haven't heard.

01:41:26
Speaker 3: We talked briefly right after the incident happened, just I think like because it was such a big deal that it was like now the higher ups step in and like, you know, say something, communicate, But we haven't. We haven't really talked since then. I've talked to all of the different castmates at different times and points. I haven't talked to anybody really since the fight aired, with the exception of Jennifer and Brittany and Denise.

01:42:03
Speaker 2: To check in on you.

01:42:05
Speaker 3: Yeah, and what people don't understand about Brittany and Denise, and I just want to put this on wax right because I know everybody has got they got their their think pieces and things.

01:42:15
Speaker 2: Brittany de Niece, I'm just getting to know you. But I love you, but I love Britney.

01:42:21
Speaker 3: I think Brittany's hilarious.

01:42:23
Speaker 2: But Brittany is a really But.

01:42:26
Speaker 3: Here's what I want people to understand, right me, Brittany and Denise formed real friendships and relationships outside of this show while we were filming. We had so much in common, Like my husband is planning for the Hornets, Brittany's child's father played for the Hornets. You know what I'm saying, Like we're talking about things in Charlotte. Denise at the time, her daughter's uncle was my husband's teammate. You get what I'm saying. Like we had a lot of similarities that are out of everybody on this cast, we three can relate the most because we have a husband or a child's or whatever that are actively in the league right now. We can relate to each other better than anybody else. And then you throw the fact that we're all around the same age, we have kids around the same There were so many similarities that you just could not ignore. So we're building these relationships outside of the show, just on some cool like this is not for TV, this is just keeping in communication. They checked on me consistently and vice versa. Like there were so many instances where throughout the season one or all three of us felt like I just cannot go on, like I just can't do this, I'm about to just drop out. And we kept each other encouraged, We kept speaking life over each other. And so I get that people feel like, well, you just met her, and you did. Have you ever heard the saying you could meet somebody, you could know somebody for five minutes that does you better than somebody you've known your whole life. So I get that people are saying we're trauma bonding and we're no, this is just somebody that.

01:43:59
Speaker 2: Really I felt that way. I felt, I'm gonna tell you honestly how I felt. Again, this is me watching the show.

01:44:04
Speaker 4: I did feel like Britney and you were trauma bonding bits for your mother experience, and I felt like Britney was dumping so much of her pain onto you.

01:44:14
Speaker 2: And again, this is the way before.

01:44:15
Speaker 4: Obviously we talked today and I get way more so I regret saying that, but at the time I also believe that it was trauma bonding because I just felt like, that's between mother and daughter. Don't step into it. And look, even today I do feel this way. I wasn't there.

01:44:30
Speaker 2: I'm not filming with you guys, I have no idea what's going on.

01:44:34
Speaker 4: I will always feel like at the end of the day, especially when it comes to mother daughter dynamics, I just felt like it's so deeply rooted that Hona won't nobody getting involved with that mess. And that's why I did say that. So I'm going to admit to that, and that's why I owe some real shit. I also was not happy with Evelyn, who I love, but I was like, Evelyn, we all know when it comes to your daughter, baby, we can't say nothing nothing about her before you go off. And although I'm now understanding now that Evelyn knew way more than what was shown on the show, I still today felt like Evelyn, being a mom, should have, in my opinion, said I have to stand on the fact that that's between y'all and I'm not gonna get myself involved in it. And my apologies are to you too for even me saying that I felt like you're bringing a trauma bothering because now that I know more, you guys weren't doing that.

01:45:36
Speaker 3: Yeah, and I get it. People can only go off of what they see on the show, right, But somewhere along the way, we've gotten so far off path from the real meat and bones of the situation to just the death threats and all of the things that people are saying. It's like, how do you get that from this? Like, you're telling me how to handle somebody that I has been in my life for thirty two years and you don't know anything about me. You don't know what led to this point. You don't you get what I'm saying. So it's it's very hard to digest. And I think that even on the subject of Evelyn, you know, they're like, oh, you all have everyone's you want to be her friends so bad? Look what she did to your mom. If you watch this show. On one of the opening scenes, it was Jackie and Evelyn. They was out baby shopping and Jackie said, out of her own mouth, I want you to get to know my daughter. I want you to get to know Shanny. She's in town. But now I'm wrong cause I talked to the lady and gave her a conversation like, I just don't people are picking and choosing what they see, and I get it that that's reality TV and whatever, But somewhere along the way, we've just veered so far off from the real in reality TV, and everybody is so used to come sit down and have a drink, let's talk about each other. Da da da da. I would rather be on TV dealing with the real situation, no matter how traumatic or whatever that may have been with me and my mom. I would rather that any day over me sitting here arguing with random castmates that I just met about a bag or a man or This was a real situation and you may not like the way that I handled it, but this is my real life and that's what we'll live on.

01:47:23
Speaker 2: Mainly.

01:47:25
Speaker 4: Has since released a statement apologizing to Jackie, saying she watched the footage as a mother with a daughter.

01:47:33
Speaker 2: She regrets stepping in, and she regrets it.

01:47:36
Speaker 4: She also has said since then that a lot of her castmates have unfollowed her since she released that statement.

01:47:43
Speaker 2: Have you heard from me?

01:47:47
Speaker 3: Here's what I'll say about me. I was one of the castmates that unfollowed her after her statement was released. Me and I from day one from the friends giving event, we had a really cool connection. It was I knew of her before basketball wives, from the snob Life brand and everything else, and so meeting her in person someone that was so seemingly like larger than life, and you don't really know what to expect seeing that she was so cool and she was such a girl's girl, and I'm just like, wow, like I really like her, you know what I'm saying, and vice versa. From that moment forward, I felt like we maybe we weren't close as you know, Brittany and I have gotten her whatever, but we were really cool. Like she would text me, she would check in on me. I'm texting her back like she's calling me her partner in crime, my piic. We were locked in. From my standpoint, leading up to the fight, her opinions were her own. You're seeing Jackie get up and walk away, You're saying out of your own mouth that that's wrong, you would never do that to your daughter, etc. So to now get to this point where the whole world is on fire and everybody is talking about this, and this is such a trending topic, and based on one incident, you feel like you owe her this apology, which is fair. I get it, Like I understand you, I didn't best explain the way that this fight happened, and so you thought something else happened and you judged Jackie off of it. I can understand that. But I feel like what made me unfollow her or what made me feel some sort of way about her is like the other commentary in the statement, like as a mother, I can understand and if I was, but as a daughter you should also be able to understand because you yourself have said you and VICKI have problems. You yourself have said you understand the mother womb. You and yourself have said the things that she did to me during the season on and off camera were wrong. So if you want to apologize to her based on judging her, whatever your commentary was after the fight scene, I understand and I respect that. I'm not never gonna take that away from you, and I'm not trying to get anybody on my side. But all of these opinions from all of these castmates were their own. The only person you ever saw me say essentially pick aside to on camera was Jennifer when she said, how can I assist you? How can I whatever? And I said, well, you can start by holding her accountable, and if she's not gonna be accountable, then you could tell her. I just don't for I want to be around you, because that's the type of person I am. I don't I'm not fratnizing with bad mothers or disrespectful people, or you get what I'm saying. I don't play like that. I don't want you in my space. If that's what you want, and that's what you'll do to your own kid, there's no hope for me. So that's what I meant when I said that to Jennifer. I didn't come in Jackie's friend group, mind you. Britney's new, fairly new. Denise is definitely new, Ty is new, Meing is new. This is not Jackie's fring group. Jennifer, Brandy and Evelyn is Jackie's fring group. Okay, cool, But y'all are acting like there's not this new group of people who have formed their own opinions based off of these interactions that they're witnessing on a day to day basis. They were there in Vegas the house when the cameras weren't rolling, they heard the stuff she was saying. So to now get to this space where I feel like some of you are like, oh, how do I you know what I'm saying? I don't know how to I'm not looking for a politically correct answer. Was it right or was it wrong? Would you witnessed? Was it right or was it wrong? If you are not basing anything else, not a childhood, not a nothing, off of what you experienced over the course of this season, was it right or was it wrong?

01:51:32
Speaker 2: Do you think she did that for the audience releases the same man?

01:51:36
Speaker 3: I don't know because I never took me really for real as like that type of person. So I was shocked. I just quietly unfollowed it and just went on about my day because since if that's how you feel, I respect it. I'm not gonna press you about it. It is what it is, and I just thought that we were better than that, but you just never know.

01:51:55
Speaker 2: My hope is this for you and your mother.

01:51:58
Speaker 4: I obviously I've not said this before, and I know your mom, and I want you to know. I text your mother the night the night I saw it, and my exact words your mom was, I love you.

01:52:09
Speaker 2: I'm praying for y'all. This too shall pass because.

01:52:12
Speaker 4: I want you to even enough for my spirit, and I want to say this to you.

01:52:20
Speaker 2: I love you. I'm praying for you, and this too shall pass. I want to say that too to your face as well, because.

01:52:27
Speaker 4: I know that for me and our situation is vastly different. I know for me, I had to tell my father how I felt. Not for him, it was for me. I had to release that shit. I had to release that pain. I spent twenty eight years of my life thinking my own father does not like me and the way he treated me and spoke to me, and I had to say to him, this is how I feel. And I even said to him, Chantell, this has nothing to do with you. I'm doing this for me now. Granted, in his defense, I said to myself, I'm chantel. I don't know what it's like to be born in nineteen forty nine. I don't know what it's like to be a black man drinking out of the color water fountain. I don't know what it's like to have a father who pickedcotton. I don't know what it's like to grow up and at a time where there was no openly gay person in the world. I don't know what it's like to be a black man in the fifties, sixties, seventies, and eighties when I was born. And I had to give my father grace because I said to myself, all the things you did to me. He didn't abuse me physically, nothing like that, right, but the way he treated me and sometimes ignored me. And I said to myself, if I put myself in your shoes as a nineteen forty nine born black man at that time, with the tools that you had, and then all of a sudden, your son, your third born son, comes out as Carlos King like that, Okay. I had to say to myself, I now know that you didn't have the tools to deal with that, and I just had to put myself in his shoes to understand him more and to forgive him, and me forgiving him was for me to release the pain. And now we're the best of friends. What I want for you, your mom, at some point, not today, this year, next year, is whenever the time is right, because I agree with you one thousand percent. I believe God situated this madness for you and her to at some point have whatever is meant to have. I don't think this is the end of you guys. Do I see you guys being best friends? No, I don't, But I do see you guys being in a place of coexisting and whatever.

01:55:00
Speaker 2: That looks like for you. I want you to know this. For me, I am praying for your mental health.

01:55:06
Speaker 4: I'm sure it's difficult to see your altercation be a meme and and to have that image displayed for the rest of your life. That one day your daughter has to see that, that one day your son has to see that. And I want the world to understand that, Yes, you guys have given them content to work with. But what I would like to implore for the audience is, Okay, y'all.

01:55:35
Speaker 2: Got it, and I think at some point enough is enough. Enough is enough.

01:55:41
Speaker 4: I understand where they're coming from in terms of being a black person, like we don't.

01:55:45
Speaker 2: We just don't treat our moms.

01:55:46
Speaker 3: That you did.

01:55:53
Speaker 4: But I also understand I also understand this. I am very proud of your generation who are now standing up for themselves, saying just because y'all did that that way, that doesn't mean I have to subscribe to that.

01:56:08
Speaker 2: But I do think.

01:56:10
Speaker 4: There's a way for your generation to do things a different way where the underlining thing is still respect. And that's why I said on my own show, y'all both wrong. I said that right.

01:56:22
Speaker 2: But I.

01:56:24
Speaker 4: Appreciate you so much for having the ability within a week to reach out to me and say, let's talk, because I have been praying for your family in my quiet times. I've been praying for you, your siblings, your father, and you and your mom because.

01:56:47
Speaker 2: I don't know what that feels like.

01:56:49
Speaker 4: And I want you to walk away today with an understanding of forgiveness and whatever that looks like for you at the time that it looks like.

01:57:00
Speaker 2: And I want the world.

01:57:02
Speaker 4: To chill out when it comes to that me being out there, because it's not an image that I think it's funny anymore. It was never funny for me. But I think, I think, I think we have to stop for your mental health.

01:57:18
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, I agree. I think that it's hard for people to maybe have sympathy for me because they just see my anger. They just see me on tin, right, And you don't when you don't really understand the backstory, you don't have the pleasure to sit down and have these sort of conversations with me. You're judging a book by its cover or by this small efsert that you've seen on social media or TV or whatever. I just I have to for my own mental health just stop feeding into it, you know, like people say, oh, well, why did you turn your comments? So I've turned the comments back, going this is my page. I will protect my piece here by all means necessary. Now, if I make my way to the blogs and I want to and I want to dispute my truth or argue what a random stranger would, I could do that. But as far as for as for me at my house, We're not. We're not gonna do that. I'm not gonna sit here and let thousands of people comment and say vile things and judge me off of how I handle the situation that is very painful and real to me, Like nobody is perfect and it sucks that this will, you know, live on. I think that it's interesting that there have been there have been several fights in the history of basketball wives that never seen the light of day, that have been blurred out or cut out or whatever it may have been. And so I think that it's interesting that this one did see the light of day in its entirety, and I don't know why that is, but I think when I really sit with it, outside of all of the hate that I've received, I have one hundreds of messages Carlos from people that are saying, I see you, I get it, I understand. I've been in this situation before, and even though I don't agree with the way that you handled it, or I don't agree with the image of you put in your hands on or whatever it may be, I have sympathy for you. I have empathy for you. Things that maybe people won't say publicly I've received privately. So because of that, I know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. And I can't get too down on myself right now. You know, Like I've had the pleasure of that happened in Hawaii at like the top of the year, you know what I'm saying, Like we're at the end of summer now. I've had months to sit with it, to heal from it, to go through therapy, to talk to the people closes to therapy. Yes, absolutely, I've been in therapy for like a decade. Job what I know people would be like, how are you in therapy. Acting like that. Sometimes you can when you're not around your triggers or you're not around those traumatic situations, you can just suppress them. But when you get in it and you're right face to face with something that you've been battling for so long, it's so hard to think of all of the tips and the tricks and the things that you've learned, and you know, the acupressure points, and I'm not thinking about none of that. I'm spiraling right now, and I want y'all to leave me alone. You get what I'm saying.

02:00:16
Speaker 2: I get it.

02:00:17
Speaker 3: So I just I'm going to continue to give myself grace. I'm going to continue to hold myself accountable. I'm going to continue to just try to grow and be better. Like you know, even in my green screens, Like I said, I don't know what happened to my mom or what made her this way or whatever that may be, but I know that somewhere along the way, she made a conscious decision, and she continues to make a conscious decision not to get the help that she probably needs and not to go to therapy and address the things that she may feel about herself, about her kids, about her whatever that may look like for her. I'm doing the necessary work to change that in my life so that it doesn't bleed onto my kids. And that's the silver lining in all of this is that I really do feel like I broke the cycle. It was done in a very messy, crazy way. Sometimes that's just how it goes, and I'm okay with that. If my kids grow up one day and see that footage, am I proud of it?

02:01:23
Speaker 6: No?

02:01:24
Speaker 3: Absolutely not, Like that's insane. Who would be proud of it? But that is why I wanted to take the time to sit down with you today so that my side of the story and my take on things right, because of course there's always three sides mine, hers and the truth and everything. I get what people saying, but I wanted this to live on somewhere in some part of the Internet that this is how I felt, this is what I was dealing with, this is what I was battling, this is what caused me to arrive at this point. And all I can do going forward is just be better. Like that's really it. That's all that you can ask for. I can't go and change it. I can't go back and not put your hand off of me. I just have to move forward. And that's the problem with social media and the society today. They don't want you to move forward. They actually would drag this on for as long as they could, if they possibly could. But there will always be a new story, a new headline, a new news cycle, and y'all will be picking on somebody else tomorrow, you know what I'm saying. And because of that, that's what kind of keeps me afloat. I'm like, okay, y'all just don't know no.

02:02:27
Speaker 2: Better no, Like I said, what's next for Chantel.

02:02:34
Speaker 3: I'm not gonna lie to you, Carlos, I don't know.

02:02:36
Speaker 2: And that's okay, Yeah, that's okay. You don't have to know, Chantel. You don't have to know.

02:02:43
Speaker 4: I don't want you to do anything, honestly, I want you to continue to heal. I want you to continue to be in therapy. I want you to continue being a mom and.

02:02:53
Speaker 2: A wife, and.

02:02:56
Speaker 4: Don't feel the need to rush into the next thing. I want, thousand percent agree with you. God's hands is in everything, and it's up to you and your mom to figure out that relationship. But more importantly, Chantelle's up to you to figure out how to be an extension of a mother and a wife, and a woman and a daughter and a sister moving forward. And that's the only thing I want for you. Don't rush anything as of now, and I thank you for this.

02:03:31
Speaker 2: Thank you, my love, appreciate anytime. It was exactly what that means the world to me.

02:03:43
Speaker 1: Reality with the King is executive produced by me Carlos King, produced by Lizzie Nimitz, and a partnership with the Lack Effect Network. You can also find us on my YouTube channel at the Carlos King Underscore.

02:04:00
Speaker 2: The tenth