Love Locked In with Abigail & Noah | Golden Hour

00:00:07
Speaker 1: Welcome back to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour. Thanks for joining us. We're so excited to be back.

00:00:13
Speaker 2: How are you doing, Susan, I'm good, Kat. Long time no see like three days. Hey, if you haven't done it yet, now's the time.

00:00:22
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00:00:23
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00:00:34
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00:00:40
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00:00:45
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00:00:50
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00:00:51
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00:01:06
Speaker 1: We do today we have Bachelor Nation fan favorite couple ads soon to be newlyweds and I hope not Oklahoma Sooner fans since I'm a Texas fan. We have Noah Herb and Abigail Herringer. Oh, he's doing the upside down horn. Oh with them fighting words. Noah, We're so glad you guys are here. How are you doing them?

00:01:30
Speaker 4: Welcome, Hello, Kathy and Susan. We've been very excited to hop on. We think you guys are hilarious. I'm excited to talk to somebody other than Joe and get right into it.

00:01:41
Speaker 3: Yeah, let's do well.

00:01:42
Speaker 2: First of all, do you need an officiate, because you know that's what I do.

00:01:46
Speaker 3: I did not receive a phone call Abigail.

00:01:49
Speaker 5: You did such a great job with the older wed.

00:01:52
Speaker 1: And just to be clear, I come with her, So she goes, I.

00:01:57
Speaker 2: Was down in Austin, Texas at Kathy marrying her son and his wife. But one more thing. I just loved viewing your engagement pictures.

00:02:08
Speaker 3: It was so pretty and the way you pick her up, Oh, it was just.

00:02:15
Speaker 1: Are you guys ready?

00:02:18
Speaker 6: She said? Are we ready?

00:02:19
Speaker 1: Are you ready for the wedding?

00:02:23
Speaker 6: Are you ready for the wedding?

00:02:24
Speaker 7: I think we're like planning wise, everything's pretty much planned.

00:02:28
Speaker 6: And then in terms of like mentally very ready. Yes, we're ready to get to.

00:02:33
Speaker 4: The honeymoon and be married already, but very excited for the wedding and the life. We're trying to create out here.

00:02:42
Speaker 3: Where are you going on your honeymoon?

00:02:44
Speaker 6: So that's in my department.

00:02:46
Speaker 4: It was a little shocking two nights ago looking at flights. But the goal is go to Japan, go to Kyoto, Tokyo, fit some of the culture, busy city, and then go to Philippines.

00:03:00
Speaker 6: I'm wow myself for a month. I love it.

00:03:03
Speaker 4: I would love to try to go back to some of these places you know with her, but that's the goal.

00:03:07
Speaker 1: Well, if it doesn't work out, you're getting married this fall, So none of that works out, Why don't you come down to Austin and I will treat you to sweet seats at a U of Texas football game.

00:03:20
Speaker 6: I know you'd love it.

00:03:23
Speaker 2: Does hey tell me something? Are you guys doing something to the home?

00:03:27
Speaker 3: Are you renovating? And hell is that going?

00:03:31
Speaker 7: We are in the middle of renovating our home. I feel like we're fixing more problems than actually renovating and creating some people out of it.

00:03:41
Speaker 5: But it's a bit about a year.

00:03:43
Speaker 7: We moved here about a year ago and we're pretty much done with our downstairs.

00:03:48
Speaker 5: We did our kitchen.

00:03:50
Speaker 7: We came here with no furniture, so it was just a lot of shopping for that, and then right now it's going to be ninety degrees outside and our ac decided to stop working.

00:03:59
Speaker 5: So that's know what's project for today.

00:04:01
Speaker 1: So no, no tell us, how are you? What's you started before we came on air? You started to tell us, But tell everyone else what's going on with this air conditioner? You're the mister fix it man?

00:04:12
Speaker 3: Yeah, something fuzzy flying in there or what?

00:04:15
Speaker 6: So long story short, Yes, we are renovating our house.

00:04:19
Speaker 4: Abby has turned into a phenomenal architect designer. She changes her mind a lot, which is unfortunate, but she's.

00:04:28
Speaker 1: Getting a woman's prerogative.

00:04:35
Speaker 4: I've been kind of leaning into Half of the stuff is honestly so expensive. So honestly I'm doing a lot of it myself and I have some other rental properties, but I'm kind of leaning into just the Noah and Ally stage of the notebook, except for she's not, you know, cheating and acting like it's okay.

00:04:54
Speaker 3: Do you guys want to stay there?

00:04:56
Speaker 4: Like a little two man t that totally leaned into it. And last night a bat flew up into my air conditioning. So it's like eighty five degrees in this house. I'm tired of hating h back guys to fix it, so I'm fixing it myself today.

00:05:15
Speaker 1: We want to know what was in the air conditioner you sent?

00:05:19
Speaker 6: I'll take you back.

00:05:21
Speaker 4: I'm thinking to myself, why does this air conditioners sound like a nineteen eighty nine old mobile?

00:05:27
Speaker 6: Cut it off. I took it all apart.

00:05:30
Speaker 4: You know, I spent thousands of dollars in the last month paying for HVAC stuff to be fixed, So this one I wanted to do myself. And I reached my little grubby hands in there and I felt something fuzzy and kills down my spine.

00:05:44
Speaker 6: It was a bat.

00:05:47
Speaker 1: Where were you? Where were you?

00:05:48
Speaker 3: Were you screaming?

00:05:50
Speaker 5: I was inside, enjoyed the AC decorating room. No idea at that.

00:05:55
Speaker 6: I just took a video of this that I'm going to post.

00:05:57
Speaker 4: I spent my time trying to find it because she doesn't wear her cochlear implant half the day and walks around.

00:06:03
Speaker 6: It's just this game of cat and mouse. Where were you?

00:06:09
Speaker 1: You know what that means? Right?

00:06:10
Speaker 3: She doesn't want to be disturbed. It's doing her own things.

00:06:15
Speaker 4: Meanwhile, I'm in my little batmobile running around trying random stuff.

00:06:20
Speaker 6: All over it.

00:06:20
Speaker 1: Wait, was the BAP dead for a long.

00:06:23
Speaker 6: Time, So I was gas lit by everyone.

00:06:27
Speaker 4: I knew everybody because I knew I smelled something dead, and I was like, it's a mouse or something. I went crazy. Then a week later the smell went away. I'm like, okay, I am crazy, there's nothing dead. But a month later it came back.

00:06:44
Speaker 3: The air condition was working the whole time, and then all of a sudden.

00:06:47
Speaker 6: It's that's the thing.

00:06:49
Speaker 4: I hate that I wasn't there personally, but I'm assuming he was just kind of banging around in there for a while.

00:06:55
Speaker 3: Oh yes, conditioning.

00:06:58
Speaker 1: Well, Susan and I just got back, not Jess, but we were in California. We were playing golf and the weather was incredible. That's another story we can get into if we have time. Uh huh. That's why I well, I live in Austin, Texas. With the heat index tape, I think it's supposed to be one hundred and ten. So you know, you've got nothing on me. The difference is I'm chilling in air conditioning right now.

00:07:20
Speaker 6: A difference is you have a working air conditioner.

00:07:23
Speaker 1: Well, you know, I'm really okay.

00:07:28
Speaker 3: Well, you'll get to the bottom of that.

00:07:29
Speaker 6: Thank you. We'll make sure to be updated.

00:07:32
Speaker 1: All right. So we do a topic of the day and we want you guys to join in with us on this. Okay, So we asked a couple of questions and we're just going to discuss it. The first one is, what's one question you never want to be asked on a first date? Susan, we don't even know what a first date is anymore, but you guys, what's one question you don't want to be asked?

00:07:58
Speaker 6: Were strangers? A stranger asked me on a first state?

00:08:01
Speaker 5: Oh?

00:08:01
Speaker 3: I mean it's a first date.

00:08:02
Speaker 6: So do you know from the Bachelor?

00:08:05
Speaker 4: That one?

00:08:06
Speaker 6: Why? I don't love that one? That one's weird?

00:08:09
Speaker 1: Would they ask you if you're known from the Bachelor?

00:08:12
Speaker 4: Well they asked me if I am Noah from the Bachelor. That one's strange to me.

00:08:17
Speaker 3: That's one you want to want to ask.

00:08:19
Speaker 6: She might know, she might not. This one never did it?

00:08:22
Speaker 5: So I was, but we were on the show. I knew you were from the Bachelor.

00:08:29
Speaker 2: Well what about what's one question you wish you could ask on a first date but never would?

00:08:37
Speaker 6: What's your credit score.

00:08:40
Speaker 3: Pretty high?

00:08:42
Speaker 1: Or that goes right along with open your mouth and show me your teeth that I like that.

00:08:50
Speaker 4: Any of those I think, just the stuff we're all thinking. But you don't want to ask it. But it's a first date. You might as well get it out of the way, you know, find out if it's too much.

00:09:01
Speaker 3: How about you, Abby?

00:09:03
Speaker 7: I think I would ask something just to save myself time down the road.

00:09:08
Speaker 5: You know, what's your most toxic trait or what's your breath?

00:09:11
Speaker 7: Fly?

00:09:11
Speaker 1: Like what.

00:09:13
Speaker 5: By the way, and I can decide that in there?

00:09:16
Speaker 1: That is perfect, Abby, That is I think that's what I would do. What about you, Susan saying.

00:09:21
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, I always do it. I'd pay for my own mail and get out of there.

00:09:27
Speaker 1: You know what else i'd want to ask if they were divorced, I'd want to say, listen, let's just cut to the chase. Here, did you cheat? Did she cheat? Did she you know?

00:09:36
Speaker 7: Like?

00:09:37
Speaker 1: What? Yeah? How to go down? And I don't want your life story, so give it to me in thirty seconds.

00:09:43
Speaker 4: Well, that's the thing about you, ladies, is I'm very careful not to say old because you're not old, right, But you've lived life.

00:09:50
Speaker 6: You know, you've lived life. You're done with the bs. Let's just get down to the bottom of it. Did you cheat on him? Did you cheat on her? You know?

00:09:59
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean you too.

00:10:01
Speaker 3: What did young people think we are old?

00:10:03
Speaker 6: Well, that's it's they're fools.

00:10:07
Speaker 1: They're just fool you know.

00:10:08
Speaker 2: You know it's funny. I say it myself all the time. Oh I'm old, but I could still kick your butt.

00:10:15
Speaker 6: That's part of it though, with the whole life experience.

00:10:18
Speaker 4: You know you're not old, but you know you've you've got age, and it's just another you know, who cares?

00:10:24
Speaker 1: I mean, do you feel I don't feel old? I mean, that's like some more things I do. Abby. Do you does anyone ever say to you, gosh, you look good for your age? Does anyone ever say that to you?

00:10:39
Speaker 3: I know, she's too young.

00:10:41
Speaker 6: It's a weird thing to say, I think.

00:10:43
Speaker 1: But that that's exactly where I was going. Noah to Susan and me. People will stop to go, oh, you guys look so great for your age, and I'm like, you know, screw you. Well, Like, what does that mean? They don't say it to young people?

00:10:58
Speaker 3: How about this one? Oh you can pull that off? What does that mean?

00:11:03
Speaker 1: I think they're talking about what's about the guy. I can tell you that's the guy that wants the day we do, wants you to take your shirt off. That's a whole different conversation.

00:11:11
Speaker 2: Women say it all, Oh, you could pull that off. I could never, I go, is that?

00:11:15
Speaker 1: What is that?

00:11:16
Speaker 4: I've heard people say to Abby, you sound really good for a deaf girl. I'm like that you cannot be serious, Like I think it's meant intentionally good.

00:11:27
Speaker 6: But it's all of those things are weird.

00:11:29
Speaker 7: Like if you break it, say the last part, yeah, right, just.

00:11:33
Speaker 2: Say you look good, you speak well, you're hot?

00:11:37
Speaker 6: Well yeah, any of those will work.

00:11:40
Speaker 1: And Noah really is hot? Right now? How's that? How's that.

00:11:45
Speaker 6: In getting hotter with age?

00:11:47
Speaker 7: Just?

00:11:47
Speaker 1: Is the hat on.

00:11:51
Speaker 3: Your hats absorbing your sweat?

00:11:53
Speaker 1: Is that it?

00:11:54
Speaker 6: I'm wearing black for a reason.

00:11:56
Speaker 1: I'm just I'm just telling you if you rooted for you to, if you said, right now on air, I love the University of Texas, your air conditioner would come right back on magically.

00:12:08
Speaker 4: Hey, don't tell me yet again. I know she'll say it for anything. I don't hate u. T It's just I want to be convinced.

00:12:15
Speaker 6: All right, we'll see.

00:12:16
Speaker 1: I mean fair. I'm not. I'm not from Austin, but you know, you can't live here and not support UT You just can't.

00:12:25
Speaker 2: Now, you got to have some home routes that I had that same issue when I lived in Texas. Coming back to being an Eagles girl because that's my hometown. But I was with the Dallas Cowboys for nine years. I paid taxes there. I root it for the home team until they played the Eagles, of course, but up here you like get shot. I mean, I couldn't even look like I'm excited.

00:12:49
Speaker 4: Is paying property taxes kind of the indicator.

00:12:53
Speaker 6: Of when that's your home.

00:12:54
Speaker 3: Yes, yeah, that's what I.

00:12:56
Speaker 6: Paid property taxes. You're in bed with.

00:12:58
Speaker 3: Them, I'm in it.

00:12:59
Speaker 2: I'm in it to when we did Bible studies with them, and we did a lot of things with the Cowboys, so they were I was a fan, you know, until I was so.

00:13:07
Speaker 1: I'm originally from Massachusetts, and I was a fan of the New England Patriots until Bill Belichick. He's seventy two day in a twenty four year old I'm so over it.

00:13:19
Speaker 3: That says that a lot.

00:13:21
Speaker 6: You like military era, the Dynasty era.

00:13:24
Speaker 1: Darn right, darn right, listen, I used to go to the games because I am old back when they played they were the Boston Patriots and they played at Harvard Stadium from the Harvard University's College.

00:13:40
Speaker 3: Now we're showing the.

00:13:44
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, and now and now it's in Foxboro, the Foxborough Follies. Okay, let's move on.

00:14:00
Speaker 3: This is going to be fun. Guys. Wait, do you hear this?

00:14:02
Speaker 1: All right? Here we go, So for our questions today with you, guys, we thought it'd be fun to answer five of the top questions you and your partner should have answered or talked about before getting married, to see if you guys are on the same page. So, and you don't have a lot of time since your big day is soon approaching, so both of you can answer, and Susan and I will chime in if you have any words of wisdom or in short, Susan and I will chime in. As you know, Sue, we all know Susan's a wedding efficient so you know we've got an expert here if we need help. All right, let's get going with the first one. Why do you want to get married? And what does marriage mean to you? Why don't you start abby?

00:14:54
Speaker 7: So I want to get married just because I lived my life my early twenties single and that was a very fun time figuring out who I was. But there's just something about going through life with somebody, with the best friend and just doing everything together. And I just feel like that's what marriage means to me, is going through the good times in the bad times, and it's been my favorite part. So I am just super excited to keep doing what we're doing.

00:15:21
Speaker 5: But Mary, instead of engage and did I answer good?

00:15:27
Speaker 1: No, that's a great yo.

00:15:28
Speaker 5: Know.

00:15:28
Speaker 1: I'm almost crying over here.

00:15:29
Speaker 3: She gets today?

00:15:30
Speaker 1: Yep, you get today? You come on, you got no what you got? You got a lot to measure up to here.

00:15:35
Speaker 4: Okay, why would get Why would I want to get married?

00:15:41
Speaker 5: Not?

00:15:41
Speaker 1: Why would you? Because that suggests that there you go, it's happening. Though. Let's get the temps right.

00:15:47
Speaker 6: I love this woman. I grew up very traditional.

00:15:50
Speaker 4: My view of marriage is, you know, kind of a covenant and you work on it, just like you work on yourself and your relationship with God and your family.

00:15:58
Speaker 6: It's all kind of a bundle.

00:16:00
Speaker 1: For me.

00:16:02
Speaker 4: I don't plan on us ever separating. We're locked in forever. Marriage is a great way to.

00:16:09
Speaker 6: For me, for us to kind of symbolize that and stick to it.

00:16:12
Speaker 1: You know, I got'll say they both get you both get a's. Honestly, those are two of the best answers I've ever heard. Wait a minute, Susan, one more quickly, why do you want to get married? Thirty seconds or less?

00:16:28
Speaker 3: Why or how? Next question?

00:16:33
Speaker 1: Please?

00:16:34
Speaker 2: So, how you guys handle disagreements and is there anything you could be doing differently? How what happens when you disagree or have an argument.

00:16:47
Speaker 5: There's what I'm learning for us because we are very different.

00:16:51
Speaker 7: I think naturally, I'm somebody that I need space, like if something happens, I need to kind of step away and take some time and just really think through the situation and my answer, whereas he's somebody where he wants to address it right away and talk through it, conversation, figure it out.

00:17:09
Speaker 5: So it was something that we both have had to work on.

00:17:12
Speaker 7: So I kind of had to compromise and say, Okay, I can't just leave you hating, like that's not fair to you to you know, leave you for a day or a couple of hours or so forth. So I feel like I've been working on trying to talk through it the minute something starts bothering me, instead of like waiting for it to build up and then pest.

00:17:32
Speaker 3: Yeah, you can't take the implant out and just go.

00:17:37
Speaker 6: That was actually one that just throw across the walls.

00:17:42
Speaker 5: Was growing up, I would after com So I carry that relationship.

00:17:47
Speaker 3: I love that, okay.

00:17:51
Speaker 6: And I think we put a lot of effort into it.

00:17:53
Speaker 4: I kind of had the privilege and honor, I guess working in the ICU, I got to see a lot of old very I mean older than you guys, much older.

00:18:05
Speaker 1: To hear that Susan really old the way he just said that old, I mean even older than you guys like dust almost dust I had in my sixties.

00:18:13
Speaker 4: Just dialed in their dinosaur age and at the prime of their life. And I've watched you know, the couple, somebody die and you get to see the family and the spouse talk after and whatnot, and almost all of it they boil down to, like the.

00:18:30
Speaker 6: Little things really don't matter.

00:18:31
Speaker 4: When you've been married this long, when you're committed to each other this long, you don't really care about little.

00:18:38
Speaker 6: Things, especially when it's in comparison to death and life.

00:18:41
Speaker 4: So for us, it's like if it bothers me enough that I keep thinking about it, then I stop what I'm doing.

00:18:48
Speaker 6: We tackle it. We don't get a bit angry.

00:18:49
Speaker 4: But if it's something that I'm like, maybe I just need it, That's where I take from her, Maybe I should just think.

00:18:54
Speaker 6: About it more like, am I actually don't actually even care about this thing? You know, like the argument or whatever.

00:19:00
Speaker 2: Sometimes in the heat of the moment, people react.

00:19:03
Speaker 6: Of course, you can't help. This is the best case scenario.

00:19:06
Speaker 4: One thing we try to do is let her have her space, especially because I found sometimes some of our arguments literally come down to miscommunication. And I don't mean like, oh, we didn't communicate well, I mean literally there was a gap of communication.

00:19:21
Speaker 6: And we work better if we have our conversation.

00:19:25
Speaker 4: She gets space, and then I text out kind of what I'm saying, so there's no I didn't say this.

00:19:30
Speaker 1: She I gotta say. You two guys, Susan and I we you know, we get a lot of people asking this advice because, as you've pointed out four times already, Noah, we are older than dirt, and so people ask us questions, and Susan and I often say it's communication, and uh uh cooperation and what's and what's the other one that you said.

00:19:55
Speaker 3: It you got to listen to each other.

00:19:59
Speaker 1: Compromise, that's the word cop and you both used those terms. So you both said you're on it. You're on it, like I have high hopes for this, for this merriage, which makes me not want to which makes me don't want to even ask the next question.

00:20:15
Speaker 2: Wait, wait before you go on, Kathy, I've been told I over communicate, like I don't need to know.

00:20:22
Speaker 3: I mean, you're thinking and you too, well, you know.

00:20:27
Speaker 7: The relationship is over. You can't go wrong over communicating. It's only under community. But this is for the guys out there.

00:20:34
Speaker 4: If there's guys that listen to this podcast, you know, you don't do yourself a favor by over communicating details that she doesn't care about understand or doesn't care to learn.

00:20:47
Speaker 3: But women don't get that. We want you to know every detail.

00:20:51
Speaker 1: Speak for yourself.

00:20:52
Speaker 6: I don't exactly.

00:20:54
Speaker 4: There's a point where it's like, all right, I just need to convey an emotion, the details do not matter, and move on.

00:21:03
Speaker 1: All right. So here's what I know. This doesn't apply to you, but I'm just going to torture you for thirty seconds. Uh, what does cheating mean to you? And when is it a deal breaker? And is cheating? How do you define it? Kissing, texting, liking posts, sex. I mean, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that I personally consider having sex with someone cheating. It's not my partner. I'm just gonna go out on that limb. But what do you guys consider cheating?

00:21:34
Speaker 5: So we both said cheating was a non negotiable.

00:21:37
Speaker 7: If that line gets cross, I think, just naturally, I have a really hard time building trusts so that if that trust is gone, it's just longer parable for me. And what cheating looks like for me is obviously anything physical, whether that's kissing, having sex. But I would say minus almost a little bit further than that, just because I think we have a really strong, I think attachment to each other, and I think if somebody were to come in and like be like the emotional cheating side, I would consider that cheating just because like I should be the priority, Like I should be the one your sign up to confining everything in, and once you open that up to a third party, that only opens the door up to more and more issues. So I would consider that a form of cheating?

00:22:24
Speaker 3: Is I like this skid? I think both of them. Are you kidding me?

00:22:29
Speaker 1: I'm not kidding you two seem to have all the answers.

00:22:33
Speaker 3: And I will say this the shit together you do.

00:22:37
Speaker 1: And I will tell you I was married almost forty six years. And I will tell you, Abby, the one thing when we were your age, back in the seventeen hundreds, we were uh and talking about getting married. That was the one thing that you used exactly the word that we did. Cheating was non negotiable. Now we didn't have texting, you know, but but exactly what you said, you know, the heart. I mean, we didn't have social yet. I mean, is that a thing for you? Because cheating for me with sort of how you just described it. What about liking posts, you know, liking someone's social Instagram or whatever.

00:23:17
Speaker 6: I view it like a cup. I do a lot of things like a cup.

00:23:21
Speaker 4: Right If I'm wanting to say I'm going to get married to her, if not, I'll just stay dating around girls my whole life. But I'm going to say I'm gonna get married to her one person, lock it down the rest of my life, and I want everything in my cup to go towards that relationship, and if I'm throwing water out at the likes and responding to the dms and me personally, I have a lot of friends that are girls. I'm probably a pretty flirty person in general. I saw the way Susan smiled when I was talking.

00:23:49
Speaker 3: I too. I like it. I just don't like it, but I don't mean any harm.

00:23:53
Speaker 6: There's no room for error.

00:23:55
Speaker 4: You know, if I got one cup with one quantity of water, I want to put as much water as I can where I wanted to go, and it's.

00:24:02
Speaker 6: Just the rest.

00:24:03
Speaker 1: I did the same thing, but I filled my cup with wine or either or Okay.

00:24:09
Speaker 2: So do you guys find a balance financially the way you spend your habits and how you stay on the same page just one the bigger spender than the other or.

00:24:21
Speaker 7: So. I think we were really lucky that we grew up pretty similar, like we were number big spenders going into the relationship. We're both pretty fruit frugal when it comes to our money. We work really hard, and I think we just have a lot of value around that. So for the most part, we've actually been really on the same pace with spunny habits I would say we've probably spent equal and bounce by not going through line by line.

00:24:47
Speaker 3: You can't get better than this man.

00:24:49
Speaker 4: I grew up too poor to spend a lot, That's all I got to say. And she's a finance background, frugal. You should meet her mom and her dad. They're all similar the way they think. So we got fortunate with that. Wow, it makes it easy that we have some of the same goals of what we want.

00:25:06
Speaker 1: You know, so joint are you gonna have joint checking accounts? Are you gonna have so up? Because today a lot of young married couples have his account, her account, and then a joint household account.

00:25:19
Speaker 6: And I think that's fine. I think, however people want to do it.

00:25:21
Speaker 4: We're going to have a joint you know, we're working on building together, so a business we make will have a joint in our definitely spending and things like that. And we know the sac it was shared because we pretty much we do everything together. We split everything, you know. And then for house stuff because we're doing house things. I do a lot of the work, but obviously we want it. It's both of us win to spend money on that yuff. It's like yeah, we're both kind of fligned with where like if you want to squirt a random carpet or whatever, some stupid purse, sure, but overall it's mostly just geared towards like.

00:25:58
Speaker 5: Yeah, right now, joint credit cards or anything that we do together.

00:26:02
Speaker 7: We just put on the bill at the end of the month, and then from when we're mary kind of what you said, probably like a joint checking account. It just gets so complicated with influencing the home stuff all the ls. So we're kind of navigating how to figure that out.

00:26:18
Speaker 1: That's a question for I can help you with that one, Abby. This is what you look Noah in the eyes and say this to him. What's mine is mine and what's yours is mine? A problem solved?

00:26:33
Speaker 2: What about picking out furniture and stuff? Do you have an eye for furniture? Do you have to ask him if he likes it prior to buying it, or like just get what you want.

00:26:44
Speaker 4: So when this started, it was kind of like, Okay, I want her to just do design and be good at it and like it.

00:26:51
Speaker 6: That's the perfect world. And it did kind of turn out like that.

00:26:54
Speaker 4: So it started like showing the options and stuff and I'd just be like.

00:26:57
Speaker 6: That's terrible or that's very hard to pull off.

00:27:00
Speaker 4: Like you don't know the details behind that's hard. Now it's like I don't think she really checks. She might get one or two options, but like.

00:27:08
Speaker 5: Everything, they're still point to ask.

00:27:09
Speaker 6: I'm like listening. All of it can be congruent and come together and you like it. It's your house.

00:27:16
Speaker 4: I know to look good do it, But don't you know.

00:27:19
Speaker 1: What do you cook? Who cooks in your who cooks in your partnership? There? Who's the cook?

00:27:25
Speaker 7: I probably cook more often. He's a really good cook, but I think just day to day I really enjoy cooking. So I kind of just take that on.

00:27:31
Speaker 6: You're not going to like this. If I work a lot, she'll drop off lunch that she cooks and a little I didn't get.

00:27:39
Speaker 1: Yeah, but we try to love you too. I want I want your father, your uncle, I mean anytime. Yeah, Susan, the line forms here, get behind me, one brother.

00:27:55
Speaker 7: That's I thought only a number.

00:28:01
Speaker 4: Nine?

00:28:02
Speaker 1: Why I thought age was only a number? You see how fast the worm turns there, Susan, We're back to being old as dirt. We're moving on here.

00:28:20
Speaker 3: Okay, this is going to be fun. I put the readers on in their row.

00:28:26
Speaker 2: So we have some fan questions and we want you guys to help give some advice to these questions. You go with that, Okay, okay, guys. This is from Isabella, which is my granddaughter's name. Isabella is twenty four and she's from Round Rock, Texas.

00:28:43
Speaker 1: WHOA, that's right around the corner.

00:28:45
Speaker 2: Hi, Dallas, I am a bridesmaid in my friend's upcoming wedding and I need some advice. Being a bridesmaid is already an expensive ask, as we're paying for our dresses, the bachelor party, et cetera. And now the bride just did something I think is a bit strange. She just venmo requested us all for our getting ready pajamas, snacks of the day, and for our hair and makeup for the day of her wedding. I think I assumed she would be covering some of that, especially since she is requiring us to get all our hair done and makeup done by her stylists. I really don't think I can afford all these additional costs, so I'm curious what you think I should do. The wedding is coming up next month and the bride is already very on edge, so I am not sure how to bring this up delicately. Any advice is appreciated.

00:29:51
Speaker 3: Thanks y'all.

00:29:52
Speaker 1: Yeah, go, what do you think, Abby?

00:29:55
Speaker 7: Alan's tricky and this is the exact reason why I didn't want any bridesmaids just become very common kind of in the wedding world.

00:30:06
Speaker 5: It's tricky.

00:30:07
Speaker 7: I get both sides, just because it is the bride's day and she wants a certain vision and that's why she's getting the hair and makeup done or having all her bridesmaids get it done.

00:30:16
Speaker 5: Do I think she's being unreasonable? Yes, I just.

00:30:20
Speaker 1: Think I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Who is the bride? Okay, just want to make sure, Okay.

00:30:29
Speaker 7: I just think if you require anything from your bridesmaid, so like if you want a very specific dress, hair makeup, you're not getting people another option. But like bachelor wrap party, Like if it's an Airbnb and you're getting some use out of it, then I would think you would pitch him for that, or like the snacks up the day of the wedding when they're getting ready. If you're consuming the neck, I think that's fine a pitching for But if you're a bride and telling bridesmaids, hey, you need to do X, Y and Z exactly how I want it.

00:30:58
Speaker 5: That should be on the bride personally forever.

00:31:02
Speaker 2: The bride's family takes care of the snacks the day of the wedding, I mean, come on, that's really and you give them an option.

00:31:09
Speaker 3: Do you want your hair and makeup done?

00:31:11
Speaker 1: Yeah?

00:31:12
Speaker 4: I would at least you don't want to, you know, cause extra stress. If they're actually friends and she wants her in the wedding and she's happy for her to get married, I would have a conversation and say, you know, she knows your situation, or she might not. But hey, some of this stuff, it's not that embarrassing. It's more embarrassing for you guys to burn a bridge.

00:31:31
Speaker 1: So I love that. I love that. No, I'm with you. I'm with you.

00:31:36
Speaker 6: We don't need match I'll bring my own pjs whatever, I have white pjs. Like if it's that, if it's that big of a deal, there's ways around it.

00:31:43
Speaker 2: That should be the gift from the bride, the pajamas and the snacks.

00:31:46
Speaker 4: Yeah, But if the bride really, if somebody talk to her, and I hope she hears this, if somebody talks to you and you realize what you're asking not everyone can do. You might too, but you're asking something that not everyone can do, and if you actually want them.

00:32:00
Speaker 7: She might only be asking all this stuff because all the girls keep saying yes because I mean, they're afraid to say no, and so she just keeps thinking, Wow, everyone's on boor Okay, let me just add more to the list. If no one's told her no or kind of express how you know, difficult that.

00:32:13
Speaker 5: Is to kind of pull off.

00:32:15
Speaker 3: I want to get communicate.

00:32:18
Speaker 1: I do think that weddings though, My daughter got married a few years ago, and my son Susan Mary their their wedding was in March, and I kind of agree with you, Abby, these weddings have gotten so crazy out of hand. And the pajamas, Noah, what you don't get is, you know, the bride's pictures now start you know, ten years before the wedding. We've got to have what I you know, what I look like at ten, what I looked at eleven, and then right up to the wedding day when everyone's in there getting ready pajamas.

00:32:52
Speaker 4: It's a thing if I want everyone to have matching all my bros to have matching pj's.

00:32:58
Speaker 1: I want to be there if you're I'm going to buy.

00:33:00
Speaker 4: Rose because I'm the one that I wanted to look a specific way.

00:33:05
Speaker 2: And what about the what is it called bachelorette parties? They traveled? Now used to be went to dinner and a strip club or something, and now there, I'm off.

00:33:14
Speaker 1: I'm sorry you buy.

00:33:16
Speaker 7: For the week, cornadi outfants and about financially that has to be so expensive?

00:33:24
Speaker 1: Wait, no reaction from you too?

00:33:28
Speaker 3: A strip club that was old school?

00:33:32
Speaker 1: Yes, okay, you are older than dirt.

00:33:34
Speaker 3: Nobody does to Vegas and get a stripper.

00:33:37
Speaker 6: What's the difference.

00:33:37
Speaker 3: I play golf, pickle Yes, golf and dinner.

00:33:43
Speaker 1: Can I come? Can I come to your bro party? I? Can I come to your bro party. I can play pickle ball, I'll play golf.

00:33:49
Speaker 6: He will plan a date.

00:33:51
Speaker 1: Let's do it. I'll wear pajamas. You know, we're all I'll bring the snacks to pajamas. Whatever. All right, let's give the next Yeah. The next question is from anonymous sixty four from Green Bay, Wisconsin. Hello, Kathy and Susan. I'm feeling a little embarrassed writing in, but I thought I would ask for some help. My late husband passed away over ten years ago, and I've struggled to get back out into dating. I feel a bit more ready now, but it has been ten years since I've been kissed, and certainly haven't done anything else intimate. I am craving that intimacy and connection again, but I truly don't even remember how to hold someone's hand in that way. How do you get back into that part of dating after over a decade off. I'm worried I won't be good at it anymore, or that it will just make me miss my late husband all over again. But I also don't want to go the rest of my life without kissing again. Curious if you have any thoughts on this, well, I mean.

00:34:56
Speaker 2: I do my husband. It's it's like riding a bike. If you're feeling something for this guy and he goes to hold your hand, your handle automatically, it's agree.

00:35:09
Speaker 1: I agree you guys, I pulled the unlucky chain here. My husband passed away about five and a half years ago, and I would say to you, anonymous, you will always miss your husband. He's always going to be a part of your life. But hopefully if you find this new person, it will bring new joy into your life and you walk hand in hand figuratively and literally with that new person, never forgetting the past and the joy you had before, but building a new life with someone else. And I think you're right, Susan. It's sort of like getting back on a bicycle if you if you feel the vibe for this guy, it's going to work out fine.

00:35:51
Speaker 2: And don't feel like it's you when you don't feel a vibe. Just no, that's not the right one, right.

00:35:57
Speaker 6: I think you hit it on the head.

00:36:00
Speaker 4: The only thing I would add is you maybe bring it back to the basics, go back to playfulness, uh, just companionship, friendship, and then you know, other memories can start to not replace, but fill in some of the gaps. But you got to just kind of go back to the basics. What's comfortable, what's your idea of what you think it would be like?

00:36:23
Speaker 6: You kind of gotta w all those things.

00:36:25
Speaker 2: So I have a quick question for you too. When you first met Ice, did you feel that spark? Did you know that chemistry was there?

00:36:34
Speaker 7: I mean, I wouldn't say it was like love at first sight, like, oh my gosh, I just met my husband, because I think we definitely grew. But I would say I definitely got like we called it Fanny flutters.

00:36:48
Speaker 5: On Paradise so c but I definitely have that feeling.

00:36:52
Speaker 7: So I felt a sort of attraction to you, But I wouldn't say like, oh my.

00:36:58
Speaker 2: My, I can't live without you, but Abby, don't.

00:37:02
Speaker 1: I mean, I think if you had said that without knowing him at all. The only fool I know who's ever said that was me. When I met my husband at a fraternity party. Across the room, I pointed to my girlfriend that was with and I said, you see that guy over there, I'm going to marry him. So I literally did that. But in a more rational state, now that I'm over the age of twenty, I think that you're right. You have to get You can be physically attracted to someone, but you got to get to know him to see if it's going to be your husband.

00:37:33
Speaker 5: Well, and for a little bit more context, he was the villain on his season.

00:37:38
Speaker 1: I knew I loved you, know what, so was I.

00:37:41
Speaker 7: So that's why I was trying to navigate a little bit. Was trying to get to know Noah on Paradise and our relationship and kind of separating that from what I saw on Tsha's season.

00:37:52
Speaker 5: So I think that was my little hesitation at first.

00:37:55
Speaker 7: So that's why I wasn't like, Oh, that's my husband, I'm going to marry him, because I wasn't.

00:37:59
Speaker 1: Sure said zip it. I just said zip it. And speaking of zippit, uh, I want to ask you Abby, other than picking out your snacks and your pajamas that everyone's going to chip in and pay for, because you're not doing it. I know you're a busy girl with this wedding, but tell me briefly. I heard you have a book coming out that you have written with your mom. Tell us a little bit about it.

00:38:23
Speaker 7: Yeah, So The Duck Girl is a book that I worked on with my mom over the last three years, and it really kind of just details our combined experiences, so hers as a parent, kind of navigating, you know, getting the diagnosis that your child has with disability, and kind of just all.

00:38:39
Speaker 5: The emotions and everything on a.

00:38:41
Speaker 7: Personal level outside of kind of doctor's appointments and audiologists. Just I think that was something we locked growing up, and so that was kind of a bit motivation and reading books. And then the second half is kind of my journey with hearing loss, so growing up with it, navigating school, dating, friendships, the show, and everything as someone that has a hearing loss. And our goal is just hopefully to support families that are going through a very similar situation that we are. I will send you guys some copies, and I really hope you.

00:39:14
Speaker 5: Guys enjoy it.

00:39:15
Speaker 4: The perspective her mom have is has very unique something I can imagine.

00:39:20
Speaker 1: Yeah, I would love, I would. Where does your mom live? Abby?

00:39:24
Speaker 7: She's in Oregon right now and we're working on getting her out to Oklahoma with my dads. So we're getting the whole family out here.

00:39:31
Speaker 6: Wow, working on it. They bought a house here.

00:39:36
Speaker 3: In addition, are you really?

00:39:38
Speaker 1: I mean, did you grow up in Oregon?

00:39:40
Speaker 5: I did? Yeah?

00:39:42
Speaker 1: And you grew up Noah in Oklahoma?

00:39:46
Speaker 6: Yep?

00:39:47
Speaker 1: Wow?

00:39:48
Speaker 5: Wow really?

00:39:49
Speaker 1: Now, I just you know, we have just a couple of seconds left. I just find it interesting that so many people on Bachelor Nation, in Bachelor Nation, both male and female, are traveling nurses. Are you still a traveling nurse?

00:40:06
Speaker 6: Once?

00:40:06
Speaker 4: Always? I did the last eight years and I love it. Right now, I'm.

00:40:12
Speaker 6: So focused on real estate in our house and other stuff. It's hard for me to.

00:40:16
Speaker 4: Do both, to be honest. Yeah, so I'm I'm taking I'm on a break right now. I've had to use my nursing skills oddly enough randomly back in Tulsa.

00:40:25
Speaker 6: But right now it's all home home stuff.

00:40:30
Speaker 5: It's taking up all his time right now.

00:40:32
Speaker 3: Ready, do you guys plan the have babys?

00:40:35
Speaker 1: Yeah?

00:40:37
Speaker 5: I think I feel we want to wait just a couple of years, get this house.

00:40:40
Speaker 4: We want to travel around with each other that yeh, listen, I'm you're not asking my how old.

00:40:48
Speaker 1: Are you guys?

00:40:50
Speaker 5: Twenty nine?

00:40:52
Speaker 6: Yeah?

00:40:52
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, so you know you have you have plenty of good years. And I will say to you not that you're asking, but as I said, Susan, are full of advice. You you have kids when you want them, but you understand something. You have them the rest of your life. And this is the only time that you guys can enjoy each other and do the things you want to do because wisdom.

00:41:19
Speaker 6: Yeah, we agree, that's enjoy each other.

00:41:22
Speaker 1: Yeah, I enjoy each other. When you do have babies, Susan, I will come and help you take care of them.

00:41:27
Speaker 3: We're good.

00:41:29
Speaker 1: You know we have you.

00:41:31
Speaker 6: Know I have ten brothers and sisters now or not? Now? I always have they got what number were you? I'm a twin. My twin was just on the show. We're number seven and eight.

00:41:43
Speaker 3: Right, I have a twin have I don't have it all over.

00:41:46
Speaker 4: But I would love a Susie Kathy babysitter because I'm uncle. No, no, I feel like you.

00:41:50
Speaker 2: Guys will come for the weekend. You can have the week again. I want pajamas snacks.

00:41:57
Speaker 1: I want pajamas snacks. Yeah, exactly. My grandpa name is there you go. My grandmother's name is Kiki. And let me just tell you I deserve an award. I was at my daughter's house this morning. My daughter is the flu. Her baby had the flu. Her husband had to leave very early this morning. Again, yeah, she's been She had COVID three weeks ago, and so did the baby. I was over at her house, in my car at her house at six point thirty this morning to be there with the baby's bottle when she woke up, change her diaper, make her breakfast, feed the dog, let the dog out. I'm I love babies. I love babies, all right? Well this does it was. We've had so much fun, but this is going to do it for this episode of Bachelor Happy Hour's Golden Hour. Thank you truly, Thank you guys, Abigail and Noah for joining us, your advice, your relationship with each other. There's your marriage is going to be wonderful. I know what I feel it and I know Susan and I, along with everyone else, wish you a lifetime of joy and happiness and your upcoming marriage.

00:43:10
Speaker 3: What is the date?

00:43:12
Speaker 5: It is beginning of October.

00:43:14
Speaker 2: We're kind of specific, okay, just.

00:43:20
Speaker 3: I wish you all the very best.

00:43:23
Speaker 4: We love you guys. Thank you guys for having us on. I knew we would.

00:43:27
Speaker 6: I was sure what you'd be like here? Exactly?

00:43:33
Speaker 1: Do we look younger in person?

00:43:34
Speaker 6: Know?

00:43:34
Speaker 1: What do we look younger in person? Do what do we look younger in person? Yeah?

00:43:39
Speaker 6: You guys look so good for your age.

00:43:42
Speaker 1: I know that was.

00:43:47
Speaker 3: Thank you again, guys.

00:43:48
Speaker 2: I love you both, and thank you all for listening and joining us today, and be sure to follow Bachelor Happy Hour as we have new episodes coming out every week and you don't want to miss them. I mean, look at the the perfect couple.

00:44:01
Speaker 1: Really and you saw the fun we had today with our questions we answer questions every episode. To send us a question, all you have to do is go to bachelornation dot com, slash Golden Hour, or hit us up on social at Bachelor Happy Hour and.

00:44:16
Speaker 2: Just listen to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you listen to your podcast.

00:44:23
Speaker 3: Thanks again to out