Stuck in the Middle | Golden Hour

00:00:07
Speaker 1: Hey, we're back. Thanks for joining us on Golden Hour. Hey Kathy, how are you? I can't believe we're in person again. We get to stare at each other and.

00:00:15
Speaker 2: Really talk like I knowed just like real people, real people are having a conversation. We just we need empty coffee cups.

00:00:21
Speaker 1: Oh gosh, that was so funny. Hey, you guys out there listening to us like, we wanted to get that in and we were afraid in the morning because we were going out the night before that it would be bag.

00:00:31
Speaker 2: So we did a video and yes, Bachelor Nation, you are all so smart, very coffee cups. But to be fair, the coffee was brewing and it was and it was that's right. So we were doing our thing and Susan, yeah, I don't know about you. But now that it's over and show is engaged to chalk.

00:00:53
Speaker 1: But do you know what I saw that the whole entire cod I know people. Did you ensure you had people come up to you all the time? Who is it?

00:01:01
Speaker 2: Who? I said?

00:01:02
Speaker 1: Did you watch the show? Figure it out?

00:01:04
Speaker 2: I don't know. I just I'm just thrilled. I'm thrilled for her. It's it's you know, christ believe it's December. What do you think they're doing for Christmas? Oh?

00:01:12
Speaker 1: I don't know, but I know I'm a little behind. I'm a little behind Christmas shopping. It's overrated, totally overrated.

00:01:19
Speaker 2: All right, what are we doing today?

00:01:20
Speaker 1: Cat?

00:01:21
Speaker 2: I know we're going to do a question of today, some questions and you know the drill, right, But before Susan, we're gonna do the question of the day, which I don't even understand. So I'm going to read it and maybe you can explain it all right for you? All right, here we go. When you were younger, which in your case was yesterday, what was the time that you were faced with a really big uphill battle that you were wary about overcoming and ultimately persevered. What vice do you have for anyone stuck in a difficult time in their lives an uphill battle?

00:01:59
Speaker 1: I mean I thought one like I was fearful of not making the cheerleading squad like.

00:02:05
Speaker 2: That, did you persevere and say raw, raw team?

00:02:09
Speaker 1: I used to compete in gymnastics, And did you really? Yeah? I say damn a lot?

00:02:16
Speaker 2: You still? I know, guys, I feel like Susan and I are really close friends. And then she pops out with something. I'm like, Damn, I did not know that. Okay, the only thing I can think of is, as many people know, I used to weigh two hundred pounds.

00:02:29
Speaker 1: I can't believe this is straight. Can I just say something?

00:02:32
Speaker 2: Please?

00:02:32
Speaker 1: Don't get mad?

00:02:33
Speaker 2: Oh here it comes.

00:02:34
Speaker 1: I mean seriously, she constantly says, I'm fat. Have you seen Kathy? I think you have body dysmorphia? Moving right along.

00:02:44
Speaker 2: With the question of the day.

00:02:45
Speaker 1: So that an uphill battle. Well, I'll tell you why it was.

00:02:49
Speaker 2: Yes, I couldn't. Yeah, I just kept eating, gaining weight.

00:02:52
Speaker 1: And what did you do?

00:02:53
Speaker 2: Well, here's what happened. I went to this at my sister, who I graduated high school early, so she's a superbreen thank you. So I went to visit my sister, who was a year older than I and she was in college. And there we went to this party and this guy was stating around the corner and this really handsome basketball player. My sister said, what do you think of my sister? What do you think of Kathy? And he said, she's really funny and nice and so pretty, but she's so large. I went home. That's what did it. I went home on a diet. I went home, started to diet and never started.

00:03:28
Speaker 1: She walks ten miles a day still to this day.

00:03:30
Speaker 2: It's all your fault, Jim, it's all if that was his name, Jim, it's all your fault anyway. That's I mean, And that's why I overcame that I put my mind to it.

00:03:39
Speaker 1: So my advice to stay eating because you don't have a great appetite, I have to admit you do.

00:03:43
Speaker 2: I like food. I just don't like a lot of food you don't like. I don't listen.

00:03:48
Speaker 1: I don't eat to survive, right, That's why some people eat to survive.

00:03:52
Speaker 2: Or live to live to eat, and some people eat to live. Yes, I eat to live, that's right. Susan has chicken pricotta midnight because she needs a late night snack. Wait a minute, I want to just say advice that I have for anyone stuck at a difficult time in their life, take one small step at a time and give up. Yeah, don't give up. Take one small step, because I remember when I was losing weight back in those days, and I would lose like a half a pound in a.

00:04:21
Speaker 1: Week, and you were depressed.

00:04:22
Speaker 2: I was, but you goay no, once a week, I got weighed and but here's the thing. I remember the person saying to me, but Kathy, you lost to half a pound. You didn't gain a half a pound, and those half pounds added up? And sure not.

00:04:38
Speaker 1: Did you go someplace like a weight watch? I didn't.

00:04:40
Speaker 2: I did. I went again. I know people still I did. I did, And it goes for you, you know, change my life. So people, one step. Thank you.

00:04:48
Speaker 1: Yeah. So it is scary no matter what the situation is.

00:04:53
Speaker 2: You know what I mean. I think you just have to persevere, try your best. You're not going to succeeded everything.

00:05:00
Speaker 1: I was at Jim Croche's barn. Okay, that's for those of you you don't know. Jim Crochey was a fabulous singer, singer songwriter back in the seventies. And it was haunted. And I kid you not, it was haunted. And Sharon and I we did a duo on the uneven Bars.

00:05:16
Speaker 2: I swear to God. Another thing I don't know about you, but go ahead.

00:05:19
Speaker 1: She was scared and she desision. Did you just see I said, Sharon, we know it's haunted. They're nice. I was never afraid. Isn't that crazy?

00:05:28
Speaker 2: So you didn't have to. What the hell does that have to do with the question.

00:05:31
Speaker 1: Okay, so this slipped and was so humiliated. I mean, I'm at States and you have a second to think about it, and you got to jump right back on. Let me tell you, if I could jump right back on anybody that's going through this, just take a breath and get back at it.

00:05:53
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's you know, the only thing to fear is fear itself. All those adages are true for a reason.

00:05:58
Speaker 1: But I tell you it is scary sometimes I get it.

00:06:00
Speaker 2: It is, And you know what, we're not always going to succeed. We're not, So don't don't get that in your head, guys that you have to succeed everything. The best you can do is try persevere. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose.

00:06:13
Speaker 1: See what after you read this, then you understood what it said, right. I didn't have to help her at all. Well she got I.

00:06:19
Speaker 2: Had to read it three times, Thank you, Susan.

00:06:21
Speaker 1: Okay, Well, we have some good questions today, Kathy.

00:06:24
Speaker 2: Okay, you go for it. Give me the first one. The first one.

00:06:27
Speaker 1: Then Michael asks, Hi, Kathy and Susan, I'm a big fan of your podcast, and I really could use your advice. I'm getting so sick of being in the middle of my friend's relationship. Two people from my friend groups started dating about six months ago, and I feel like I'm constantly in the middle of their relationship. I want to be a supportive friend to each of them, but it's really starting to get exhausting. How do you think I should settle this with them? I feel like they come to me because I met them both separately and formed my own relationship with each of them before we became part of this bigger friend group. I don't want to completely abandon them, but I'm starting to lose my mind. Please help. So I wonder if he's saying that they bitch about the relationship. Is that what they're doing to him?

00:07:22
Speaker 2: I'm guessing that each one comes to them and says, you know.

00:07:26
Speaker 1: He does this. I can't believe he did this.

00:07:28
Speaker 2: Can I tell you? Like many of these questions, you and I've lived long enough that I've been in this situation, and you know what I did, Michael. I went to each one of them separately and I said, with their name, you know, let's call it John and Susan. John, I love you. We're friends. I've known you a long time, but I don't want to be in the middle of your relationship. So let's keep our friendship our friendship. I want to go out with us in our groups, but I really don't want to hear. You have to communicate your boundary to set a healthy boundary. And if you tell both of them how you feel, you should be good to go.

00:08:05
Speaker 1: For me, I would be in trouble because I don't keep secrets, and I'd be telling each of the other. Well, guess what I just said. He has the same problem you're griping about right now. So you guys need to go settle this on your own. I'm out of it.

00:08:19
Speaker 2: Susan gave y'all a little tidbit about me, and I'm going to give you a little tidbit about Susan. This is you can't keep see can't keep the secret. Literally, someone can tell Susan do not on your light.

00:08:32
Speaker 1: Wait. Wait, Kathy, just last night she was about to tell me something. She goes now, listen, you can't share this. I said, please don't tell me.

00:08:39
Speaker 2: I said, I know. I think the way it went was. I said, oh, wait a minute, I forgot who I'm talking to I cannot tell you. I asked you to tell me. I'm gonna trained you, Susan, I'm going I don't know.

00:08:49
Speaker 1: I'm sixty seven now, Okay, if you think it's going to change, hey, what another one?

00:08:53
Speaker 2: Wait a minute, wait a minute, overcoming and ultimately persevering a problem. There you go. Okay, the second question. But hey, Michael, good luck. Seriously, let us know how it goes. But don't let me.

00:09:06
Speaker 1: Real Michael, or even get them together and do it. Say I love the both of you.

00:09:09
Speaker 2: Yeah, I really do.

00:09:10
Speaker 1: And I don't want to be the one that gives the wrong advice or you know. I can listen, but it's.

00:09:16
Speaker 2: No, no, no, you don't. That's that's that's where you get into trouble. Set the boundary, Michael, Set the healthy boundary, and you'll be amazed.

00:09:23
Speaker 1: Thanks for asking our advice.

00:09:31
Speaker 2: Okay, the next song, next song, I'm going to start singing. I'm gonna I'm gonna start you know, I left my heart in San Francisco. Okay, Sarah writes, Hi County and Susan, I could really use your help right now. My best friend Carly has been dating her boyfriend Jack for a little over six months. I really really don't like him. Carly has a history of dating men that are really toxic and honestly a little scary. Jack has already broken up with their two times in their relationship, and they always end up getting back together the next day. What can I say to Carly to get her to understand that she's constantly in a toxic cycle with men and I can't do it anymore. I don't want to give up on our friendship, but I just can't keep giving her the same advice, listening to the same SOB story, and then it all repeating when she goes back to them or chooses someone exactly like the last guy. Thank you. Her pain, Oh this is so easy.

00:10:33
Speaker 1: Her pain. You got to see a red flag when it's a red flag. That's part of it. But she's making bad choices and you keep repeating the same mistakes. Isn't that the definition?

00:10:41
Speaker 2: Yeah, but you're missing the question here. Carly didn't write, Carli didn't write, and Sarah did. Sara, you know what the answer is. You can't change Carly. Carly has to want to change herself. All you can do is say, Carly, I love you. We're going to be friends. But here's my boundary. Another question with boundaries. My boundary is we're not going to talk about Sam, Joe, any of the toxic guys. We're going to get together and have girlfriend time. You just have to tell her you don't want to hear.

00:11:15
Speaker 1: It relationship business to yourself. I can't hear it anymore.

00:11:18
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean there's and you know, you might feel like that's not being a supportive friend. I would argue it is being a supportive friend. Maybe that's what it will take for Carly to realize what a bad situation she's in.

00:11:32
Speaker 1: And Sarah, I asked, you ask yourself. Have you sat down with her? Have you shared what you're sharing with us? That's all it needs to be. You need to say exactly what you said to us to her. Yeah, so she sees it.

00:11:46
Speaker 2: Well, I think even if she's done it, I think when if, if Carly's in these toxic relationships, she probably does find for a day or two, and then they break up and then she you know, she's a repetitive cycle. It's a repetitive seer problem. It's Sarah, It's not your problem. Here should be your problem, Sarah, go out and scout.

00:12:06
Speaker 1: The neighborhood, find yourself one for a good guy for yourself, don't give up on your friendship. If you guys have been friends, then just be honest with her honestly. So many season I'm going to have tough saying things sometimes that are honest and it stings a little.

00:12:21
Speaker 2: But however, times to our questions and the advice and people writing in come down to it's it's not that difficult, folks.

00:12:32
Speaker 1: It's uncomfortable.

00:12:33
Speaker 2: It's uncomfortable. You have to communicate your thoughts. You have to set boundaries, you have to sometimes look elsewhere, you have to sometimes put a friendship up on the shelf for a little while.

00:12:43
Speaker 1: But you know, the only times I think in my lifetime that I backed away from a good friend.

00:12:50
Speaker 2: Wait a minute, are you warning me? Is this a warning now?

00:12:54
Speaker 1: Is when they're negative. And this sounds a little negative, like she's always complaining. I can't deal with people that don't see the half of the glass half full, or looking at the dooms day, always looking at the worst that could happen.

00:13:09
Speaker 2: But yeah, but Susan Waite, I know you really well and I absolutely agree with what you just said, but you get down and I support you. When I get down, you support me. I think the operative word here is when it's constantly negative.

00:13:24
Speaker 1: When it's always yeah, because you are very well entitled to a moment or a day even or a couple of days a week, a month. No, no, not that we'd go on vacation first. Okay, moving right along, Let's talk to Nina. Nina says, Hi, Kathy and Susan, I need your help. Was something a little silly, all right, we could do silly. I've been with my boyfriend for about three years and we've been living together for the past year. He and I both have a physical touch love langue.

00:13:54
Speaker 2: Here we go with the love.

00:13:56
Speaker 1: Language, take it off the shovel. Sorry, okay, we have a physical touch love language, so we both love to cuddle. However, when we go to bed, I like a quick cuddle while we start to unwind, and then I like my space when I sleep. He loves to cuddle me in his sleep and it's driving me nuts. He also is a really loud snorer. How do I go about asking to fix the snoring and the smothering without hurting his feelings? Also, if you have any tips on how to deal with snores that would help to Lol, love you ladies.

00:14:35
Speaker 2: Oh my goodness, Well, the snoring's easy. You get them a seapop machine and tell me they're horrible.

00:14:42
Speaker 1: There's that thing that goes inside or you know what. I don't know how old they are? Did she say? He old?

00:14:46
Speaker 2: There?

00:14:47
Speaker 1: You can get your own room when it's time to go to sleep.

00:14:49
Speaker 2: Well, wait a second, you can't fix snoring.

00:14:51
Speaker 1: I mean, well, we see medical help. I mean there are right, there's things you can do, but she needs plugs. Yeah, I mean, but the cuddling. I am a colored cuddler, and I have this one of the same love languages. I like physical touch. However, when you get to be my age and the night sweat start, and you're like, okay, that's enough. Now get on your side and just be honest. I love you sweet even Now get on your space and I'll get on my space.

00:15:19
Speaker 2: You know what I used to do, well, I used to I feel your Paintina. I used to when we'd go to bed, my husband would cuddle both of us like our own. I would pretend I can't be admitting this. No one's listening, Susan, just I would pretend I was asleep and roll over, like.

00:15:39
Speaker 1: Because I was sleeping time. But he sounds like he's going right after her and spooning her. I get hot.

00:15:45
Speaker 2: I mean, I think, I don't think you're going to hurt his feelings if you just say I need my sleep. And as far as snoring, that's an issue. I gave my husband those strips breathe right strips and put over and that kind of helped a little bit. Sometimes sometimes side not as back. Yeah, leave it on your bed.

00:16:02
Speaker 1: If he's on his back, I'll shake him.

00:16:04
Speaker 2: Yeah, Susan, that's violent, that's silent. All right, Well, good luck to you. Good luck you let us know how the story and goes. Good luck. Okay. Our next question is an anonymous one. Hi, Kathy and Susan. I want to know how I can convince my boyfriend to get a dog. He didn't grow up with pets, so he's really not used to having an animal around to care for. I grew up with dogs, and I really miss having one around. We've been together for about four years and we've been living together for two. We haven't really talked about it, and they're in anonymous lies. The problem you haven't talked about it, But let me continue We haven't really talked about it because I only just started thinking seriously about getting it a dog. How do you think I should bring this up to him? Hey, Joe, I've been thinking I'd really like to get a dog. What do you think now?

00:16:58
Speaker 1: You don't even want to know what I do?

00:17:00
Speaker 2: Know?

00:17:00
Speaker 1: I would come home with the dog. Is puppy you ever?

00:17:04
Speaker 2: Yes?

00:17:04
Speaker 1: I would.

00:17:05
Speaker 2: I have you would bring a dog home, ruppy, gorgeous little baby. Are you the same one that would tell your husband I can never have children and then get pregnant or dating them? You know, say we're dating dogs? Well dog kids? I mean serious.

00:17:22
Speaker 1: I mean she's right, you should communicate, but I I do things like that. Yeah, and how can you resist them?

00:17:29
Speaker 2: Is there is this maybe one of the reasons your divorced. How many dogs did you bring?

00:17:34
Speaker 1: He actually would have had five. He loves animals.

00:17:37
Speaker 2: You know. It's so funny. When my kids were young and they really wanted a dog, we went to the you know, the shelter it was, Yeah, it was in Austin. It was not called that, but it was a shelter and Austin Pets Alive, and we went to get a dog. And would you believe they made me call my husband or they would not.

00:18:00
Speaker 1: Yep, well, now they interview you, that's when you're adopting them.

00:18:05
Speaker 2: Yeah, and so that so that they called my husband at work. He thought it was a joke. I mean he really thought someone was when I got in front and said, Jerrold, this is not a joke. We want this dog. So we grow up with dogs, so you never know, he might really like I know, we might love it.

00:18:22
Speaker 1: I'd come home with the cutest puppy he's ever seen.

00:18:24
Speaker 2: You know what he's going to say. He's going to think you're taking care of She wants a dog, exactly. She wants a dog today, next week it's an baby, and after that it's a baby. That's what's coming Anonymous, We know it.

00:18:37
Speaker 1: I hope it's a little tiny dog so he doesn't get too angry.

00:18:40
Speaker 2: Listen, if you want to get one, my advice that you're not asking for is get one that doesn't.

00:18:45
Speaker 1: Shed, and no dandy, get one.

00:18:48
Speaker 2: Of those little cocka poodle, doodle dandy whatever they're calling.

00:18:52
Speaker 1: The golden doodles.

00:18:53
Speaker 2: They're big though, but no, they make many golden beautiful.

00:18:56
Speaker 1: And they're nice mannered.

00:18:59
Speaker 2: You know what a golden doodle Gary from Oh Yes, my friends. The golden doodles are very sweet and they don't shed, which will make your housework much easier. Let us know, Anonymous, we want to know the name of the dog. I think you should name it Kathy. Should be her first name with the middle name of Susan, or Susan with the middle name of Kathy.

00:19:19
Speaker 1: Oh goodness, good luck.

00:19:29
Speaker 2: All right, Susan, We're gonna play a game.

00:19:30
Speaker 1: Oh no, at please tell me it's not what I.

00:19:33
Speaker 2: Think it is. An okay, ladies, and Susan threatens people around here. She has to play moral quandary. So we're going to play a game of would you rather?

00:19:45
Speaker 1: Okay, all right, I'll start have dinner with your favorite musician or read an unpublished autobiography from your favorite movie star. Well, that's a new brainer. Am I supposed to guess?

00:20:01
Speaker 2: I just I can guess the linted dinner that meant food. That's what I mean that that was a no brainer to guess yours? What do you think? Let's play that? What do you think I would rather? Do?

00:20:13
Speaker 1: You like music? You would go with your musician too? I would both? Would I love to read had given a choice, and you know what because station and he.

00:20:24
Speaker 2: Or she is going to play a little private you know, all right, here's the next one. Oh lord, you know what I'm calling and sick for both of these taking Actually I would do one of them, take a gourmet cooking class together or a creative painting class together. Which do you think I would do now that we're playing this game, which you.

00:20:47
Speaker 1: Would probably do the painting class. Now you would do the you're going to have to if we go to Sicily, because that's you're doing the food.

00:20:54
Speaker 2: That's right, No, because if you listen, my whole thing about cooking is if you're doing it with someone.

00:21:00
Speaker 1: I remember at my house and you said teach me.

00:21:02
Speaker 2: And I did, right, Yes, It's just it's just the whole thing of cooking by yourself. So I would take a gourmet cooking class. I would as well, and I know you would, Okay, own a private art gallery or a private movie theater.

00:21:18
Speaker 1: Who wants a movie?

00:21:19
Speaker 2: I'd rather go hike six miles.

00:21:21
Speaker 1: I don't like either. Well, an art gallery is cool, but then you're stressed because if it's not good and you don't have great things.

00:21:27
Speaker 2: That if you're not selling the art work.

00:21:28
Speaker 1: That's what I mean.

00:21:29
Speaker 2: Yeah, it could be tough. But on the other hand, if you had to pick one, I would do the art gallery me too. Yeah, and just think about all those cool artists that would be showing. We get off our house and dream who's an artist. He's not at the starving artists. And I was waiting for you to say that, Yeah, let's forget the starving artist. Remember being in.

00:21:52
Speaker 1: Right by not tre Dom and that's where all the starving artists are out and they sketch you and stuff. And I was like, oh, I'm like Ron.

00:22:01
Speaker 2: Susan thought that she was going to me, you know, some guy wearing a brat and a paint pers and his teeth. All right, have a this is so easy. I don't know. Okay, have a garden filled with every flower you love, or a greenhouse with every plant you adore.

00:22:22
Speaker 1: Here I go again.

00:22:23
Speaker 2: I want both. I was waiting for it. So here I'm going to give you a very logical answer. Yes, every anyone who knows me, I love flowers. My husband used to bring me flowers every week. Now I buy them for myself.

00:22:37
Speaker 1: Often they're saying that, but here's flowers in the ground.

00:22:40
Speaker 2: I know. But here's the thing, this is a practical answer. I love flowers, but where I live they don't blow me around, and I'm always so sad.

00:22:49
Speaker 1: Well, there's certain kinds that will.

00:22:51
Speaker 2: Not in Texas.

00:22:52
Speaker 1: Only cactus.

00:22:55
Speaker 2: Cactus, I know.

00:22:57
Speaker 1: But Christmas cactus. I haven't you know what it used to. I used to think it was every year around Christmas.

00:23:03
Speaker 2: And it does?

00:23:04
Speaker 1: It does it twice a year?

00:23:05
Speaker 2: Mine does?

00:23:06
Speaker 1: Mine does freak me out.

00:23:08
Speaker 2: That's because it's not sure.

00:23:09
Speaker 1: If you're it just goes to all the love I give it all right, moving right along. Have a wardrobe filled with vintage designer pieces or brand new styles.

00:23:23
Speaker 2: Cannon, yes, brand news styles and every season, all right. Date someone who is always on time but a little boring, or someone who's late but full of surprises. Oh oh, I actually, what do you? I'm what do you not? Marl Quandary, I don't know. I'm thinking what you would do? What I think you would want the guy who's late and full of surprise?

00:23:48
Speaker 1: Absolutely? Yeah, Like nobody's ever surprised me.

00:23:52
Speaker 2: All right, how can we surprise?

00:23:54
Speaker 1: You can't do it? Yes, I'm challenging, you know, I'm my seventieth you're still going to be around. It's only three years away.

00:24:03
Speaker 2: Yeah.

00:24:03
Speaker 1: I want something big and I want to be surprised. Okay, I do that.

00:24:07
Speaker 2: I can give you a big balloon.

00:24:09
Speaker 1: God, she sucks takes a lot, go all right.

00:24:15
Speaker 2: I would also like the guy who's late but full surprises. I mean, all of Jones guys. That we are now.

00:24:21
Speaker 1: Boring is not in our vocabulary. I'm sorry. Even when I'm sad, I'm not boring. That's too boring. I'm a torture.

00:24:30
Speaker 2: Him, all right? Be an extra in a famous movie, or be the best friend of a famous celebrity. Well, i'm your friend, so famous famous celebrity. No, I would much rather be the best friend of anyone, just if your best friends? How good is that? Right?

00:24:50
Speaker 1: I agree? Rather learn to fly a plane or sail a yacht. I know what I want?

00:24:59
Speaker 2: What do you want?

00:25:01
Speaker 1: I want a fly plane?

00:25:02
Speaker 2: I want both?

00:25:03
Speaker 1: Yeah, there, you be a Susan being a Susan. I would like to be on the yacht, but I don't need to drive it. I would like to get the captain to do that.

00:25:12
Speaker 2: And can I tell you a fun little story? I should probably stick to find the plane because when I was in high school. I went to camp on Martha's vineyard and I learned to sail. I was in ninth grade. And if you know New England weather, it can change on a dime. And these were all sails. They were called Menemshahs, which is an area I believe of Martha's juniard. Anyway, these were old boats and I took the director of the camp out. I don't know why they did did that with me. And there's coming about and driving well, I jibed when I should have come about, and I sunk, I saw and the coast guard had to come and rescue us with the director of the camp. So I think maybe I should stick to fly the plane airplanes.

00:26:01
Speaker 1: Okay, have your dream beach.

00:26:04
Speaker 2: One I did.

00:26:05
Speaker 1: This is a good one, all right, go ahead.

00:26:07
Speaker 2: Be able to speak every language fluently or play every instrument beautifully?

00:26:14
Speaker 1: I think god, I would like both, but if I had to pick one, I would wish I could play instruments.

00:26:23
Speaker 2: That's so funny because I would love to do both. But I think i'd want to speak every language fluently so that when I traveled I could really understand people.

00:26:31
Speaker 1: In their cultures. Like, Okay, have your dream beach house or a fabulous penhouse.

00:26:38
Speaker 2: Should we answer this together? Both? Yeah, but if you had to pick.

00:26:41
Speaker 1: One, we want to be exactly we had the nice place in the city.

00:26:45
Speaker 2: All of you out there who need house sitters for your beachilds, Susan and I are available and we are neatness. I promise, and Susan will leave you Chicken Picotta. The refrigerator is our thank you gift? All right? Be with someone who writes you I'm gonna cry, why are your tortures? Be with someone who writes you heart felt letters or surprises you with spontaneous adventures.

00:27:14
Speaker 1: Both again, I.

00:27:15
Speaker 2: Know if you have to pick one, I'm going on the adventure. Yeah. I like that too, But I wait a minute, Susan, we both like spontane Here's the deal. We're gonna go. We're gonna have the guys. We're gonna go on a spontaneous adventure and one of the activities is going to be They're gonna write.

00:27:33
Speaker 1: His heart to letters. Love.

00:27:35
Speaker 2: We got it off.

00:27:37
Speaker 1: Okay, let's hate someone who's great at fixing things around the house, or someone who loves to take you out and about. Again, why are they making me choose I.

00:27:49
Speaker 2: Mean one is practical. I mean you want a guy who can fix things, but with enough money, one, please come fix my.

00:27:57
Speaker 1: In here, because not all men after you're married or in a relationship for a while, a lot of men don't like to go out a lot, with all due respect, but I need somebody to fix things around the house.

00:28:08
Speaker 2: So you're going with that?

00:28:09
Speaker 1: Now, I like to go out to Now. Yeah, dad was a fixer, I know, but you didn't date your dad and you can call and get something fix, Yes you can, you can.

00:28:21
Speaker 2: I'm going out and take me out and about. Okay, that's what I'm doing. And you know what why we're out and about. I'm gonna have a handyman at my house fix and everything. I want a.

00:28:31
Speaker 1: Lot of things in life, but I think, you know, I could settle for some you know what I like, so that I can go without. I don't know what that is, though. What could I go without?

00:28:41
Speaker 2: You?

00:28:41
Speaker 1: What could you go with that.

00:28:42
Speaker 2: I can go with? Honestly, I can go without just about anything as long as I have my children, my grandmother and my friends. Oh I'm talking relationships. What could I do without an interlations?

00:28:56
Speaker 1: What could you not have to have something? That you want.

00:29:01
Speaker 2: I'm turning around to a positive. If that guy loves me and I love him, the rest wouldn't matter.

00:29:07
Speaker 1: Really, it didn't matter if he takes you out and about.

00:29:09
Speaker 2: No, if I'm really happily in that relationship. I mean, yes, what I like to go out, But can you put go the other way? You got a guy who's cheating on you or who doesn't love you. Anybody's taking out a lot arm candy, arm care. Wouldn't you like to be arm candy? That's fulling today?

00:29:27
Speaker 1: You know what, though I am behind on Christmas shopping, I'm just saying I'm usually the girl that's done by thanksgivings.

00:29:33
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, well you've missed, you miss it. You know what I do at Christmas? I'd be interested with what other people do? You ought to write and let us know we both have children and grandchildren. I always put some money in my grandchildren's college accounts, and then I get them each a gift something. I ask my kids what they want for the job, and then for my children who are married, I ask them something that they would like and I give them money for that. Like like my daughter said, you wanted gutters for their house? Was it my son? Yeah, doing that for my son, for Kyle, for Kyle and his wife, I'm doing They want a deck on the back of.

00:30:12
Speaker 1: The ends would be like a vacation mom.

00:30:14
Speaker 2: Well, they want that too, But I just, you know what, it makes it easier for me because we all have way too much stuff.

00:30:20
Speaker 1: That I like, I kill the gift. Do you so many for the little one?

00:30:24
Speaker 2: Do you start giving? This is true. I like, I just gave my daughter because my son did Thanksgiving and so they alternated on the holidays. I gave my daughter my Christmas china because that they've sort of taken over those things. Don't you find as you get older.

00:30:43
Speaker 1: You don't want to use this because I have Nana's china. Okay, every holiday's the only time I use it. My sisters are boycotting because I get like twenty five people we're bringing paper plates. I go, that is so impersonal. No, I don't want one year I gave in It is easier, it is, but I like using that today. Use china.

00:31:06
Speaker 2: I use. I have crystal that my husband and I collected over the years, which I've also given to my kids, and.

00:31:13
Speaker 1: We only use it once or twe what I mean Thanksgiving, Christmas.

00:31:17
Speaker 2: It's like traditions, all right. Well, anyway, we've you know, it's December, it's crazy busy. I hope that you've enjoyed this time away.

00:31:27
Speaker 1: You have and you're behind.

00:31:29
Speaker 2: Come tell us how sympathize, tell us how you get organized for the holidays. That's what we want to know.

00:31:34
Speaker 1: Hey, Wen, do you decorate? Do you like your tree up by Thanksgiving week? Or are you one of these?

00:31:38
Speaker 2: When was Halloween? I remember me on my Golden Bachelo. I'm obsessed with Christmas. I love I already have my light. I had my lights on after Halloween. My Christmas light's outside my neighbors.

00:31:52
Speaker 1: Loved mail is a good time because the weather's so warm too. And you know what, make sure to keep sending us your questions because look at us, we're going to talk about every single one of them. And if you forget where to do it, you go to Bachelor nation dot com slash Golden Hour because we love connecting with you guys and listening to what's on your mind. And you could take her leaveyards by Boce, but it's just somebody else.

00:32:14
Speaker 2: And you know what, we want you to start writing in because you know, Christmas is hearing we're going to be gone. I want to know what y'all do for Valentine's Day, because Susan and I are going to have guys by then.

00:32:24
Speaker 1: And we're going we're going to be in Saint Martin laying on the beach.

00:32:27
Speaker 2: Bak all right, never mind, keep Maybe we'll go.

00:32:29
Speaker 1: To a casino that day on the side, I don't.

00:32:31
Speaker 2: Know, all right. In the meantime. In the meantime, listen to Bachelor or Happy Hours, Golden Hour on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you listen to podcasts. Have a great week.

00:32:41
Speaker 1: We'll see soon.