#51 The Elliotts

What I'm trying to remember. Do you have any celebrity 0:00:06.559 --> 0:00:08.080 impressions that you do? 0:00:08.640 --> 0:00:08.720 No? 0:00:09.240 --> 0:00:10.799 Didn't you used to do celindio? 0:00:11.640 --> 0:00:12.720 No, I used to. 0:00:12.760 --> 0:00:14.760 Do that the theme song to the Titanic. 0:00:16.040 --> 0:00:17.000 No, that was Karen. 0:00:17.560 --> 0:00:18.239 Karen used to. 0:00:18.160 --> 0:00:18.840 Sing that song. 0:00:19.360 --> 0:00:20.439 Karen does sing that song. 0:00:20.680 --> 0:00:21.800 Does she have a nice voice? 0:00:22.720 --> 0:00:22.919 No? 0:00:23.239 --> 0:00:25.560 Because guess who I have on the other line. Karen? 0:00:28.680 --> 0:00:29.600 Did that scare you? 0:00:30.160 --> 0:00:31.280 Did it give me a little nervous? 0:00:31.400 --> 0:00:33.240 Did it not make you feel alive? 0:00:36.440 --> 0:00:37.400 Oh? 0:00:38.080 --> 0:00:38.960 Get a little scared? 0:00:39.200 --> 0:00:39.800 A little scared. 0:00:40.520 --> 0:00:42.680 Yeah, she doesn't have a nice voice. 0:00:42.840 --> 0:00:44.160 I mean she can wait. 0:00:44.240 --> 0:00:48.559 A second, She's back on the line. It's Karen. Oh, Jackie, 0:00:48.960 --> 0:00:58.760 how could you say that about my singing? From Gimblet Media, 0:00:58.920 --> 0:01:05.839 I'm Jonathan Gold and this is Heavyweight Today's episode the Elliots. 0:01:11.319 --> 0:01:20.720 Right after the break, I get a lot of emails 0:01:20.720 --> 0:01:25.679 from people looking for help, but Dylan's stood out. Dear Jonathan, 0:01:25.880 --> 0:01:28.840 It read I have a big one for you, the 0:01:28.840 --> 0:01:34.400 heaviest weight yet. Dylan's email was over the top clickbaity 0:01:34.440 --> 0:01:36.560 even Hi Dylan, how are you? 0:01:37.360 --> 0:01:37.800 Jonathan? 0:01:38.280 --> 0:01:41.640 But who among us is inured to the lure of clickbait? 0:01:42.520 --> 0:01:45.600 Dylan Elliott lives in Dublin and the story he tells 0:01:45.640 --> 0:01:53.920 me you'll have to hear to believe. Dylan says that 0:01:54.000 --> 0:01:56.600 when he and his family get together, their favorite thing 0:01:56.640 --> 0:02:00.520 to do is share stories of their misfortune, mysterious ailments 0:02:00.520 --> 0:02:05.480 and plumbing disasters, near drownings, and dental procedures gone terribly awry. 0:02:06.360 --> 0:02:09.400 They always come away from these sessions wondering the same thing, 0:02:10.120 --> 0:02:12.960 how can one family have so much bad luck? 0:02:13.639 --> 0:02:17.519 So a few years ago, mostly large family gathering. 0:02:17.360 --> 0:02:20.320 Dylan says that at a recent family wedding, he and 0:02:20.360 --> 0:02:23.800 his brothers were going around the table enumerting their woes 0:02:23.880 --> 0:02:26.600 as usual wrong in their lives, when their father suddenly 0:02:26.600 --> 0:02:27.399 interrupted them. 0:02:27.560 --> 0:02:29.560 And then my dad came out and said, well, they 0:02:29.560 --> 0:02:31.640 don't know about the curse, the Elliot curse. 0:02:39.360 --> 0:02:42.880 Dylan and his brothers looked at each other. What elliot curse? 0:02:43.280 --> 0:02:45.880 They'd never heard of such a thing, And so their 0:02:45.919 --> 0:02:49.240 father offered what would prove to be a unifying theory 0:02:49.360 --> 0:02:52.720 of their terrible luck. He began at the beginning. 0:02:53.560 --> 0:02:57.359 The very beginning is fifteen twenty five. 0:02:58.800 --> 0:03:01.680 About five hundred years ago, Scotland and England were at 0:03:01.720 --> 0:03:05.160 war over the territory along their border. The people who 0:03:05.200 --> 0:03:07.840 lived along these borderlands were hardest head. 0:03:08.200 --> 0:03:12.519 And so they were left in this nomadic position where 0:03:12.560 --> 0:03:14.680 the only living they could make was by going back 0:03:14.720 --> 0:03:17.280 and forth across the border and thieving. 0:03:17.639 --> 0:03:21.960 Thieving, in pillaging, in maiming, as well as murdering. 0:03:22.680 --> 0:03:25.200 What they had to be as a culture was extremely 0:03:25.240 --> 0:03:29.560 friendly but also really murdery, because like, if you've got 0:03:29.560 --> 0:03:31.760 to be in moving from area to area, you had 0:03:31.760 --> 0:03:33.520 to be very open to people because there could be 0:03:33.520 --> 0:03:38.120 trades going on, but if they wrong you, you've got 0:03:38.120 --> 0:03:39.000 to kill them immediately. 0:03:40.240 --> 0:03:43.880 And these people, these friendly, murdery people who lived along 0:03:43.920 --> 0:03:50.120 the border were called border reavers. You say reavers, Yeah, reavers? 0:03:50.440 --> 0:03:51.080 What are those? 0:03:52.560 --> 0:03:54.760 It's kind of like the exact opposite of a weaver. 0:03:54.920 --> 0:03:57.800 So weavers makes clothes. Reavers were kind of like murderers. 0:03:58.520 --> 0:04:03.640 Wait, weavers make clothes, but revers are murderers. Yes, which 0:04:03.760 --> 0:04:06.440 technically isn't the opposite of making clothes. 0:04:06.680 --> 0:04:08.960 It's quite far away, though, in fairness. 0:04:08.640 --> 0:04:12.120 It is it is. But probably the opposite of making 0:04:12.120 --> 0:04:14.240 clothes would be like maybe ripping. 0:04:14.000 --> 0:04:15.600 Up clothes and stealing. 0:04:15.680 --> 0:04:19.039 I guess, yeah, again, not necessarily the opposite, but I 0:04:19.120 --> 0:04:24.640 get it. Yeah, it's the other end of the spectrum. Sorry, 0:04:25.040 --> 0:04:28.040 thank you. That's the opposite of a curse, by the way. 0:04:28.480 --> 0:04:32.520 To bring it back to opposites, Dylan says there were 0:04:32.560 --> 0:04:35.800 a number of Reaver family clans, but one of the biggest, 0:04:35.960 --> 0:04:40.640 most notorious, least weavery, and most murdery of all were 0:04:40.640 --> 0:04:44.360 the Elliots. And that's you. You're You're Dylan Elliot. 0:04:45.279 --> 0:04:46.599 Yeah. 0:04:46.640 --> 0:04:50.760 In fifteen twenty five, the then Archbishop of Glasgow, desperate 0:04:50.800 --> 0:04:54.159 to deter the Reavers, placed a curse on them, the 0:04:54.200 --> 0:04:58.120 aforementioned Elliot curse. I should read the cris to you please. 0:04:59.520 --> 0:05:02.720 I curse their heads and all the hairs of their head. 0:05:03.160 --> 0:05:06.960 I cursed their face, their brain, their mouth, their nose, 0:05:07.360 --> 0:05:11.560 their tongue, their teeth, their forehead, their shoulders, their breast, 0:05:12.000 --> 0:05:16.479 their heart, their stomach, their back, their womb, their arms, 0:05:16.760 --> 0:05:20.040 their legs, their hands, their feet, and every part of 0:05:20.080 --> 0:05:21.839 their body from the top of their head to the 0:05:21.880 --> 0:05:25.400 soles of their feet, before and behind within them without 0:05:26.240 --> 0:05:30.040 as a jew raised on Yiddish curses, my bubb is, 0:05:30.279 --> 0:05:33.560 may you hang upside down like a chandelier, most often 0:05:33.640 --> 0:05:37.400 levied against my grandfather for losing the TV remote. Was 0:05:37.440 --> 0:05:40.760 about as bad as I got it sounds worse than Yiddish, 0:05:40.800 --> 0:05:43.599 but still it's nothing compared to this curse. 0:05:44.080 --> 0:05:46.159 I cursed them going, and I curssed them writing. I 0:05:46.200 --> 0:05:48.640 curst them standing, and I cursed them sitting. Curse. 0:05:48.720 --> 0:05:51.320 This curse reads like a children's book written by a 0:05:51.360 --> 0:05:54.640 serial killer. I would curse them here or there, I 0:05:54.680 --> 0:05:56.120 would curse them anywhere. 0:05:56.400 --> 0:05:59.000 I curse them within the house, I cursed them outside 0:05:59.040 --> 0:06:01.080 of the house. I cursed them at home. I cursed 0:06:01.120 --> 0:06:10.080 them away from home. I cursed them rising, their cattle, 0:06:10.320 --> 0:06:14.520 their wool, their sheep, their barnyards, their cowsheds, their cabbage patches, 0:06:14.960 --> 0:06:17.480 even their cabbage patches, their horses. 0:06:18.120 --> 0:06:21.040 And it's not just the Reavers themselves that the Archbishop damns, 0:06:21.360 --> 0:06:23.640 but anyone remotely associated with them. 0:06:24.080 --> 0:06:26.200 I forbid all Christian men and women to have any 0:06:26.240 --> 0:06:30.839 company with them, eating, drinking, speaking, crying, lying, going, standing 0:06:31.200 --> 0:06:32.520 under the pain of deadly sin. 0:06:33.960 --> 0:06:38.880 And just when you think there's nothing left, a curse, okay. 0:06:39.320 --> 0:06:41.880 Made the thunder and lightning which rain down upon someone. 0:06:42.080 --> 0:06:46.600 For a full three minutes, Dylan continues on with wildfires 0:06:46.640 --> 0:06:51.480 and dyspepsia, pestilence, and plagues, until finally I. 0:06:51.480 --> 0:06:54.520 Condemned them perpetually to the deep pit of hell, there 0:06:54.560 --> 0:06:57.479 to remain with Lucifer and all his fellows, then ripped 0:06:57.520 --> 0:07:00.560 and torn by dogs until late forbear They're and sins 0:07:00.839 --> 0:07:04.560 and make satisfaction at Bennett's. 0:07:04.839 --> 0:07:09.880 Yeah, that's a curse. Back at the family wedding, seated 0:07:09.920 --> 0:07:12.640 around the table, Dylan says he remembers that when his 0:07:12.720 --> 0:07:15.880 dad was done reciting excerpts from the curse, he was 0:07:15.920 --> 0:07:17.400 met with stunned silence. 0:07:17.920 --> 0:07:20.520 You almost expect people to laugh when hear curs. Liked that, 0:07:20.720 --> 0:07:23.400 but there wasn't really a laugh. The reaction in the 0:07:23.440 --> 0:07:27.200 room with this kind of aha moment reference like this 0:07:27.320 --> 0:07:30.280 makes total sense. This explains why so many weird things 0:07:30.320 --> 0:07:31.520 of mont Our family. 0:07:32.160 --> 0:07:36.600 Weird and also weirdly specific to the curse. Dylan tells 0:07:36.640 --> 0:07:38.720 me about the soles of his feet he was born 0:07:38.800 --> 0:07:42.040 flat footed, and his tongue he was born tongue tied, 0:07:42.720 --> 0:07:45.320 and regarding the I curse you away from home part 0:07:45.320 --> 0:07:46.160 of the curse. 0:07:46.440 --> 0:07:49.840 Pick up mugged three days in a row in Paris, 0:07:50.120 --> 0:07:52.360 Oh my, And each morning I went out and I 0:07:52.400 --> 0:07:56.240 bought the slightly shittier phone than I had previously, until 0:07:56.240 --> 0:07:58.320 eventually I had a phone, which is like an old 0:07:58.320 --> 0:08:01.000 person's phone with giant buttons on it, and I got 0:08:01.120 --> 0:08:03.200 mugged for that one as well. So I got mugged 0:08:03.200 --> 0:08:04.680 three days in a row in Paris. 0:08:04.760 --> 0:08:08.640 Like three separate occasions by three separate muggers. 0:08:09.000 --> 0:08:11.520 Yeah, three separate muggers, three nights in a row. 0:08:11.760 --> 0:08:12.280 What is that? 0:08:12.760 --> 0:08:15.000 Doesn't that's insane? Like I think the other I was 0:08:15.000 --> 0:08:16.720 trying to work it out. I think the odds of 0:08:16.760 --> 0:08:20.760 getting mugged in a given year are zero point three percent, 0:08:21.680 --> 0:08:23.280 So what of the odds are getting mugged three days 0:08:23.320 --> 0:08:25.800 in a row. It's like getting struck by lightning. I'm 0:08:25.800 --> 0:08:27.520 winning the lottery at the same time or something. 0:08:34.640 --> 0:08:37.600 And Dylan says it's not just him. He tells me 0:08:37.640 --> 0:08:40.880 about his brother, a talented gardener who can grow anything 0:08:41.559 --> 0:08:43.400 except cabbages. 0:08:43.440 --> 0:08:46.360 The one thing that's mentioned in the Curse. The curse 0:08:46.360 --> 0:08:50.600 says I cursed their cabbage patches, and he can't grow cabbages. 0:08:50.640 --> 0:08:52.040 He can't grow brascas at all. 0:08:53.240 --> 0:08:56.080 I've been pretty successful growing all different types of vegetables. 0:08:56.440 --> 0:08:58.960 This is Dylan's younger brother, Rory Elliott. 0:08:59.280 --> 0:09:02.959 But like the cab in particular, like always seemed to 0:09:03.000 --> 0:09:06.679 be afflicted by some kind of like mold or fungus. 0:09:07.200 --> 0:09:08.600 Then there's Rory's feet. 0:09:09.040 --> 0:09:11.079 My mum always said that my feet were like out 0:09:11.080 --> 0:09:12.880 of a Buzzet's pretty much Talon's. 0:09:12.960 --> 0:09:14.280 Yeah, and his eyes. 0:09:14.640 --> 0:09:16.400 I tore my cornea. 0:09:16.679 --> 0:09:19.600 I had to wear an eyepatch. And mouth I've had 0:09:19.880 --> 0:09:22.920 so many mouth sulcters. I'm just being worried that it's 0:09:22.960 --> 0:09:25.079 like the cur is trying to stop me. Talk to 0:09:25.160 --> 0:09:25.920 you guys. 0:09:26.840 --> 0:09:29.760 Rory is a scientist, so he knows that believing in 0:09:29.840 --> 0:09:33.280 curses is crazy, but he also knows the value of 0:09:33.320 --> 0:09:38.040 hard data and the evidence is semi undeniable, Like how 0:09:38.080 --> 0:09:41.320 the archbishop curses them going and curses them riding. 0:09:42.120 --> 0:09:44.640 I see them that he had riding horses, but I 0:09:44.640 --> 0:09:46.160 guess it covers bicycles. 0:09:46.320 --> 0:09:48.040 Okay, what has happened? 0:09:48.520 --> 0:09:52.760 Like, for instance, one time I was cycling to get 0:09:52.840 --> 0:09:56.360 some seaweed to put on my crops because they weren't. 0:09:56.200 --> 0:10:00.360 Doing very well, his crops being the cabbages. He was 0:10:00.360 --> 0:10:02.800 getting seaweed for his cabbages. 0:10:02.880 --> 0:10:05.760 And there was an iron bar in the ground and 0:10:05.800 --> 0:10:08.960 then I ended up going like head over the handlebars 0:10:09.200 --> 0:10:13.600 on like flying headfirst into a dog food factory. 0:10:13.640 --> 0:10:15.880 Sorry, did you say you you flew into a dog 0:10:15.920 --> 0:10:18.240 food what a. 0:10:18.280 --> 0:10:19.240 Dog food factory? 0:10:19.880 --> 0:10:24.000 Yeah? Okay, broke my raist, I broke. 0:10:24.280 --> 0:10:30.120 My arm, need a lot of sticks. That was fairly cursed. 0:10:35.720 --> 0:10:36.160 Oh my god. 0:10:36.559 --> 0:10:42.000 Logical level not superstious at all, but I am a 0:10:42.040 --> 0:10:43.560 little bit superstious. 0:10:44.120 --> 0:10:48.360 This is Dylan's other brother, Tim Elliott. Tim is waiting 0:10:48.400 --> 0:10:51.400 to receive funding for his pH d in history. In 0:10:51.440 --> 0:10:53.000 the meantime, I'm. 0:10:52.800 --> 0:10:53.319 A sort of. 0:10:55.160 --> 0:10:56.480 Just a freelanced person. 0:10:56.960 --> 0:10:58.079 What do you freelance at? 0:10:59.320 --> 0:11:03.600 Oh, not really much. 0:11:08.840 --> 0:11:12.600 If Dylan is rather ere like and Rory is something 0:11:12.600 --> 0:11:15.800 of a negative nelly, then Tim is like Charlie Brown. 0:11:16.320 --> 0:11:19.360 If Charlie Brown were looking for PhD funding. 0:11:19.360 --> 0:11:22.600 I'm given the curse, well, I mean, who would have 0:11:22.679 --> 0:11:23.400 much hope for that? 0:11:24.520 --> 0:11:28.080 Like his brothers, Tim lists off sorrows specific to the curse. 0:11:28.600 --> 0:11:31.560 He went bald in his twenties, has teeth with holes 0:11:31.600 --> 0:11:33.160 in them, in his feet. 0:11:33.720 --> 0:11:38.720 When I was born, my feet pointed outwards, and then 0:11:38.760 --> 0:11:41.679 I was putting these shoes, so you think, okay, here 0:11:41.720 --> 0:11:45.440 comes a solution. But then they pointed inwards and we're overcorrected. 0:11:46.440 --> 0:11:50.200 Then there's the muggings. While Dylan's been mugged a poultry 0:11:50.400 --> 0:11:54.200 three times, Tim's been mugged five times. 0:11:54.920 --> 0:11:58.160 Oh yeah, one of them. I was mugged while I 0:11:58.240 --> 0:11:59.240 was dressed as a robot. 0:12:01.840 --> 0:12:03.360 I'm so sorry. 0:12:03.400 --> 0:12:06.960 That just really surprised me. It feels wrong to laugh 0:12:06.960 --> 0:12:10.920 at someone's misfortunes. But then when the follow up question 0:12:11.120 --> 0:12:14.360 you're forced to ask a grown man is why were 0:12:14.400 --> 0:12:18.240 you dressed as a robot, it seems acceptable somehow. 0:12:18.840 --> 0:12:19.600 This was Halloween. 0:12:20.640 --> 0:12:23.960 I was dressed as a robot called it's a tim 0:12:24.000 --> 0:12:26.600 Tron five thousand. I mean, I put so much effort 0:12:26.640 --> 0:12:29.760 into it. I had a set of light going on 0:12:29.800 --> 0:12:33.640 in my chest, drinking. I had a police sir on 0:12:33.679 --> 0:12:34.040 my head. 0:12:35.760 --> 0:12:38.280 I'm imagining you, like in a box, wrapped in a 0:12:38.320 --> 0:12:39.480 tinfoil or something. 0:12:40.559 --> 0:12:41.560 You're exactly. 0:12:47.000 --> 0:12:49.160 I was with a group of friends, all dressed differently. 0:12:49.200 --> 0:12:51.360 I think there was a bumblebee there as a pirate. 0:12:54.080 --> 0:12:54.800 There was. 0:12:55.120 --> 0:12:58.800 I'm sorry, Yeah, so the tim Tron five thousand, The 0:12:58.800 --> 0:13:01.840 Bumblebee and the pirates were walking along when they were 0:13:01.840 --> 0:13:05.040 suddenly approached by a group of kids. And when I 0:13:05.120 --> 0:13:06.760 say kids, there were. 0:13:06.679 --> 0:13:08.600 Young fellas who are fourteen. 0:13:09.240 --> 0:13:14.400 Really, Yeah, the ringleader demanded Tim hand over the beers 0:13:14.400 --> 0:13:18.479 he was carrying, but Tim refused, So he pulls out. 0:13:18.240 --> 0:13:22.040 This pocket knife and he says, I'm gonna you know, 0:13:22.400 --> 0:13:23.320 what do you think about this? 0:13:25.120 --> 0:13:25.200 Now? 0:13:25.320 --> 0:13:28.760 If you recall John said I'm wearing nothing for cardboard boxes. 0:13:29.120 --> 0:13:30.040 Oh, I recall. 0:13:30.640 --> 0:13:37.080 So the bumblebee, the pirates disappear, and I'm not quite 0:13:37.120 --> 0:13:39.960 as sleep of foot, and I get pushed onto my 0:13:40.200 --> 0:13:45.160 back like a tortuous completely unable to get up. 0:13:46.880 --> 0:13:49.920 The kids pulled the siren from Tim. Tron five thousand's 0:13:49.960 --> 0:13:53.240 head roughed him up a bit. Did you report it? 0:13:54.200 --> 0:13:58.240 Yeah, we got the police and they sort of just said, well, 0:13:59.440 --> 0:14:00.439 I mean, what do you. 0:14:00.400 --> 0:14:06.600 Expect with my family? It's like. 0:14:08.320 --> 0:14:11.880 It's shorthunt. Now here's Dylan again, like we just. 0:14:11.840 --> 0:14:13.800 Rule arizing and goes, oh, fucking curse. 0:14:14.600 --> 0:14:17.880 The misfortunes that you they you mention, I mean, do 0:14:17.920 --> 0:14:22.600 you literally feel like they're connected to this five hundred 0:14:22.600 --> 0:14:23.400 odd year curse. 0:14:25.120 --> 0:14:28.840 I think it's like this Jonathan in my head is like, 0:14:30.080 --> 0:14:34.840 if you've got five hundred years of people wishing you ill, 0:14:35.280 --> 0:14:37.280 it cannot be good for your soul. 0:14:38.600 --> 0:14:41.920 Dylan says that since the old archbishop of Glasgow levied 0:14:41.960 --> 0:14:45.320 the curse. The present day archbishop is the only person 0:14:45.400 --> 0:14:48.280 with the power to lift it. Others have made appeals 0:14:48.280 --> 0:14:50.280 to him, but he's never responded. 0:14:50.680 --> 0:14:52.840 What I love is the curse to be lifted. We 0:14:52.880 --> 0:14:54.680 will do anything to lift this curse. 0:14:55.280 --> 0:14:58.720 And so Dylan has come to me for help. They 0:14:58.760 --> 0:15:01.280 did notice that there were something in the curse about 0:15:01.320 --> 0:15:04.840 anybody who helps you, I think their curse too. 0:15:04.960 --> 0:15:07.880 It's any Christian man. All Christian men who speak to 0:15:07.880 --> 0:15:11.280 me are cursed by proxy. I think being Jewish, you're 0:15:11.280 --> 0:15:12.320 actually excused. 0:15:12.520 --> 0:15:14.680 Oh, because I am not Christian. It gives me a 0:15:14.760 --> 0:15:17.640 leg up, I think. So, yeah, is that the loophole here? 0:15:17.720 --> 0:15:20.200 Is that why you came to me. It wasn't because 0:15:20.240 --> 0:15:23.360 of my previous good works. It was just because I'm 0:15:23.360 --> 0:15:27.200 a jew, which brings us back to his email about 0:15:27.240 --> 0:15:30.200 how lifting the curse would be the biggest heavyweight yet, 0:15:31.000 --> 0:15:34.160 because the curse isn't limited to just the Elliots, it 0:15:34.280 --> 0:15:36.160 encompasses all the reaper families. 0:15:36.880 --> 0:15:38.920 I mean, there's three hundred thousand elliots in the world. 0:15:40.200 --> 0:15:48.320 How many Armstrongs and Scot's and Nixon's and Dixon's and Springles. 0:15:49.240 --> 0:15:52.520 Not to sound like one of those CD personal injury lawyers. 0:15:52.800 --> 0:15:56.440 But if your name is Scott or Douglas, Reed or Robson, 0:15:56.800 --> 0:16:00.680 Nixon or Dixon, you may be entitled to karmik compensation. 0:16:01.200 --> 0:16:03.160 I'm trying to find the exceptions to the rules, you 0:16:03.240 --> 0:16:05.360 know what I mean. Like you mentioned pringles, Like, well, 0:16:05.440 --> 0:16:08.440 you know they had those canisters of chips, so they 0:16:08.440 --> 0:16:09.040 probably did. 0:16:09.040 --> 0:16:12.000 Okay, can tell me you've had the pocket fringles not 0:16:12.080 --> 0:16:13.400 fell a little bit cursed afterwards? 0:16:14.440 --> 0:16:17.800 Well put, Dylan and his brothers are tired of their 0:16:17.840 --> 0:16:21.560 mouth ulcers and tooth holes, tired of wearing eye patches 0:16:21.600 --> 0:16:25.200 and getting beaten up by children. They're ready to live 0:16:25.360 --> 0:16:30.200 their best lives. If we got this lifted, what would 0:16:30.200 --> 0:16:32.840 the ensuing days look like? If you had to speculate 0:16:33.840 --> 0:16:34.240 for me. 0:16:35.440 --> 0:16:38.160 It'd probably be getting funding. 0:16:38.160 --> 0:16:39.040 To do your PhD. 0:16:39.880 --> 0:16:44.360 Yes, Well, when I'm be able to grow cabbages because 0:16:44.400 --> 0:16:46.560 I actually love cabbage, I don't know. I would just 0:16:46.600 --> 0:16:47.560 love to be able to grow. 0:16:47.360 --> 0:16:52.360 Cabbages, Okay, cabbages and what else? 0:16:52.720 --> 0:16:58.240 Yeah, mainly the cabbages, Like I really, I really love cabbages. 0:16:58.320 --> 0:17:02.200 It's like a stir fry soup. But I don't know. Yeah, 0:17:02.880 --> 0:17:03.720 most the cabbages. 0:17:07.960 --> 0:17:09.679 We're gonna get you, Elliotts turned around. 0:17:11.680 --> 0:17:13.000 We're gonna good to hear it. 0:17:13.119 --> 0:17:24.200 Erase the chalkboard, a fresh news start. The curse still 0:17:24.200 --> 0:17:27.200 in red to me, and it's dizzying entirety comes from 0:17:27.200 --> 0:17:30.960 the Elliot Clan Society website. It turns out there's a 0:17:30.960 --> 0:17:35.280 whole organization of descendants of Border Reavers named Elliott. The 0:17:35.320 --> 0:17:38.399 site contains a history of the Elliott family, a map 0:17:38.440 --> 0:17:42.080 of Elliott Territory, and a list of famous Elliots like 0:17:42.160 --> 0:17:45.159 Ts Eliott, the poet who dared not eat a peach, 0:17:45.640 --> 0:17:49.760 and Sam Elliott, the push broom mustachioed actor who safe 0:17:49.760 --> 0:17:54.399 to say, should probably also stay away from peaches. And 0:17:54.440 --> 0:17:57.199 then there's the page with the transcript of the curse. 0:17:57.960 --> 0:18:01.800 Underneath it there are rems and realms of comments. Stephen 0:18:01.880 --> 0:18:04.720 Kyle Elliott posts that he's the only member of his 0:18:04.800 --> 0:18:08.320 family in four generations that hasn't been to prison or 0:18:08.400 --> 0:18:11.840 had problems with drugs. I try to do right and 0:18:11.840 --> 0:18:14.159 be a good person, but I always seem to have 0:18:14.200 --> 0:18:18.720 the most bad luck possible, he says. Mary Elliott cites cancer, 0:18:18.960 --> 0:18:22.960 airplane crashes and fires. Long before I ever heard of 0:18:23.000 --> 0:18:25.119 this curse. I felt a curse had been put on 0:18:25.160 --> 0:18:29.639 our family, she writes, Believe me, the curse is alive 0:18:29.720 --> 0:18:43.919 and well. Hello, Hello, Is this Margaret Elliott? Yes, it 0:18:44.040 --> 0:18:48.280 is Margaret Elliott is the chief of the Elliott Clan society. 0:18:48.760 --> 0:18:52.440 This is Jonathan Goldstein calling from the American podcast. 0:18:52.920 --> 0:18:54.000 I'm marri Heartrising. 0:18:55.080 --> 0:18:57.440 It is my held belief that setting off on a 0:18:57.520 --> 0:19:00.399 quest to lift a five hundred year old clan hers 0:19:00.720 --> 0:19:05.320 requires the blessing of a clan Chieftainess. Margaret Elliot sounds 0:19:05.359 --> 0:19:07.480 like someone who owns at least a dozen and a 0:19:07.520 --> 0:19:10.520 half Welsh Corgies, and like real nobility. 0:19:10.840 --> 0:19:11.280 She says. 0:19:11.280 --> 0:19:14.040 She inherited the role from her father, who was chief 0:19:14.119 --> 0:19:17.520 before her. With the title, does there come a dwelling 0:19:17.880 --> 0:19:20.240 like the way the President of the United States gets 0:19:20.280 --> 0:19:23.159 to live in the White House? No, I'm fortunately not 0:19:24.400 --> 0:19:27.679 to begin. Margaret proudly shares some fun facts about the 0:19:27.720 --> 0:19:28.560 Elliott family. 0:19:29.200 --> 0:19:33.400 The Canadian Prime Minister was an Elliot. His middle name 0:19:33.480 --> 0:19:35.000 was Pierre Elliott Trudeau. 0:19:35.400 --> 0:19:39.240 Pierre Elliott Trudeau traced his lineage back to the Elliot clan. 0:19:39.320 --> 0:19:44.320 I didn't know that, Yes she did. Yeah, my middle 0:19:44.359 --> 0:19:58.000 name is Stuart it is. When I get down to 0:19:58.080 --> 0:20:01.320 explaining my mission, Margaret tells she's known about the curse 0:20:01.359 --> 0:20:04.639 her whole life. It's a part of Elliott history. But 0:20:04.720 --> 0:20:06.199 at the same time, I. 0:20:06.320 --> 0:20:09.479 Don't pay this any attention at all. Yeah, I mean, 0:20:09.520 --> 0:20:12.040 this is the first time I've ever actually talked about it. 0:20:12.880 --> 0:20:15.480 I've never thought it was remotely important. 0:20:16.440 --> 0:20:19.720 It's important to her constituents, though. I tell her about 0:20:19.800 --> 0:20:24.119 Dylan and his brothers, the eye patches, the constant muggings, 0:20:24.160 --> 0:20:28.720 the cabbage problems. 0:20:27.520 --> 0:20:31.520 Which I don't think he can plain it. I think 0:20:31.560 --> 0:20:35.320 maybe he's got the wrong sort of grand for cabbage. 0:20:35.560 --> 0:20:45.080 Yeah, the cursed kind. Although Margaret doesn't put stock in curses, 0:20:45.400 --> 0:20:48.359 she still blesses the mission and even offers to help. 0:20:48.760 --> 0:20:49.359 Well, I mean, I. 0:20:49.800 --> 0:20:52.960 Could probably get the archbishop on the phone. 0:20:53.160 --> 0:20:56.840 Do you think you can get an archbishop on the telephone? 0:20:57.119 --> 0:20:57.480 Why not? 0:20:58.560 --> 0:21:03.159 Wow? I really appreciate your good old American moxie on 0:21:03.280 --> 0:21:03.760 that one. 0:21:05.440 --> 0:21:06.280 What does that mean? 0:21:07.720 --> 0:21:11.560 What does good old American moxie mean, Margaret? It's throwing 0:21:11.600 --> 0:21:14.200 a bottle rocket into a trash can just to see 0:21:14.240 --> 0:21:17.720 it go boom. It's staring down your enemies while picking 0:21:17.720 --> 0:21:20.960 your teeth with a corn dog stick. It's sowing a 0:21:21.000 --> 0:21:24.840 Canadian flag onto your backpack when traveling through Europe. So 0:21:24.920 --> 0:21:27.960 when you toss a bottle rocket into some Parisian poobell, 0:21:28.560 --> 0:21:32.520 Canada looks like the idiot Moxie is getting a bishop 0:21:32.560 --> 0:21:35.320 on the horn and greeting him with a big fat 0:21:35.359 --> 0:21:38.879 American howdy. Do have you ever reached out to an 0:21:38.960 --> 0:21:39.840 archbishop before? 0:21:41.119 --> 0:21:41.239 No? 0:21:41.400 --> 0:21:44.080 I know Bishop wil too, but no I don't have. 0:21:45.160 --> 0:21:46.000 It'd be interesting. 0:21:47.040 --> 0:21:49.280 I will follow it up. You've inspired me. 0:21:50.600 --> 0:21:53.800 Wow, Okay, that isn't often what I do, So I 0:21:53.840 --> 0:21:54.560 appreciate that. 0:21:55.160 --> 0:21:55.600 Very good. 0:21:57.000 --> 0:22:00.680 Margaret is on the case. But before getting off the phone, 0:22:00.920 --> 0:22:03.720 she counsels me against talking to other elliots about the 0:22:03.760 --> 0:22:08.160 curse if they're blissfully unaware. She says, why share something 0:22:08.240 --> 0:22:12.160 that will only trouble them. To illustrate her point, Margaret 0:22:12.160 --> 0:22:16.520 tells me about an art installation memorializing the curse. It's 0:22:16.520 --> 0:22:20.000 called the Cursing Stone, and it's a fourteen ton granite 0:22:20.000 --> 0:22:23.560 boulder with the curse inscribed upon it. It was commissioned 0:22:23.560 --> 0:22:25.840 by the City of Carlisle in two thousand and one. 0:22:26.760 --> 0:22:32.439 Tasa was fairly unwise. Why why they believe in this curse, 0:22:32.880 --> 0:22:35.679 but there are people who do, like your friend Dylan, 0:22:36.560 --> 0:22:39.160 and I think it is unwise to bring it out 0:22:39.240 --> 0:22:41.600 again because it alarms people. 0:22:42.520 --> 0:22:45.600 But the follout caused by the stone suggests it more 0:22:45.640 --> 0:22:50.000 than alarmed people. Following its installation, the city experienced the 0:22:50.119 --> 0:22:53.800 series of disasters, the worst flood in two hundred years, 0:22:54.200 --> 0:22:57.840 an outbreak of foot and mouth disease, numerous businesses and 0:22:57.920 --> 0:23:02.000 factories shutting down, among them notably a bar called the 0:23:02.040 --> 0:23:06.800 Reaver Pub, and the local soccer team, Carlisle United, lost 0:23:06.920 --> 0:23:10.080 so many games they were relegated to a lower league. 0:23:10.880 --> 0:23:13.600 So I speak with the artist who sculpted the cursing stone, 0:23:13.880 --> 0:23:17.879 Gordon Young, of the Border Reaving Young Clan. But despite 0:23:17.920 --> 0:23:21.520 the biblical plagues unleashed by his art, Gordon doesn't put 0:23:21.520 --> 0:23:23.920 any stock in the curse at all. Do you think 0:23:23.920 --> 0:23:27.760 there's anything suggestive about the timing, you know, like just 0:23:27.920 --> 0:23:32.320 after the unveiling of your work and all of these 0:23:32.359 --> 0:23:37.639 misfortunes occurring, do you see anything not at all? In 0:23:37.720 --> 0:23:40.639 then you don't admit that the timing is sort of 0:23:41.040 --> 0:23:46.400 an interesting No, Do you feel like you've been affected 0:23:46.400 --> 0:23:48.960 by the curse? Like, do you feel that you're unluckier 0:23:49.000 --> 0:23:50.280 than your friends. 0:23:50.600 --> 0:23:54.560 I feel a lifelong sighting would be if I fell 0:23:54.640 --> 0:23:58.760 down a toilet, come up smelling of roses on a field. 0:23:59.040 --> 0:24:05.159 I have been very, very, very lucky all my life. 0:24:06.440 --> 0:24:11.000 Gordon's answer surprises me, so I conduct an informal survey. 0:24:15.640 --> 0:24:18.600 Turning to the phone book, I dial random Elliots to 0:24:18.640 --> 0:24:22.240 see how unlucky they are. Hello, is this Dale Elliott? 0:24:22.640 --> 0:24:22.880 Yes? 0:24:23.440 --> 0:24:29.120 Hello? Is this Tanya Elliott Hensby? Yes? I even phone 0:24:29.160 --> 0:24:32.600 a real estate agent on a lawn sign Elliott, and 0:24:32.640 --> 0:24:36.080 I reach out to Margaret's Elliott Society clan officers all 0:24:36.119 --> 0:24:41.160 across the USA. You're a state commissioner for Alabama, Arkansas. 0:24:41.200 --> 0:24:44.360 But yeah, I'm a chemist for Clan Elliott in Texas. 0:24:44.400 --> 0:24:47.479 Yes, yes, I'm the Northern California commissioner for it. 0:24:47.840 --> 0:24:50.119 I ask if any of them have experienced the things 0:24:50.160 --> 0:24:54.400 the Elliot brothers have, the inability to ever grow cabbage, 0:24:54.400 --> 0:24:58.919 any dental problems. You own cattle or sheep growing cabbage? 0:24:59.040 --> 0:25:02.600 Are you bald? But it seems they haven't. 0:25:03.000 --> 0:25:05.760 Nope, Nope, no, no, I'm a gorgeous ready. 0:25:10.960 --> 0:25:13.760 So I find myself wondering whether ill fortune might be 0:25:13.840 --> 0:25:17.280 less a border Reaver problem, and more a Dylan, Tim 0:25:17.359 --> 0:25:21.120 and Rory problem. What was going on with the Elliott brothers, 0:25:21.600 --> 0:25:24.560 why all the bad luck? And was the curse really 0:25:24.560 --> 0:25:28.640 to blame for it? Since Dylan, Tim and Rory's dad, David, 0:25:28.880 --> 0:25:30.840 was the one who first told them about the curse, 0:25:31.200 --> 0:25:33.879 I wonder if he would have any insight. So I 0:25:33.960 --> 0:25:37.040 reach out to David, but at the last minute he balks. 0:25:37.680 --> 0:25:40.640 Dylan says it's because his dad is nervous that even 0:25:40.680 --> 0:25:44.879 talking about the curse could exacerbate it. But in David's stead, 0:25:45.280 --> 0:25:47.359 Dylan's aunt Joe, agrees to talk to me. 0:25:48.200 --> 0:25:50.040 Hello, Johnson, how are you? 0:25:50.400 --> 0:25:51.879 I'm okay? How are you today? 0:25:52.400 --> 0:25:54.080 Not too bot I'm very loud of Friday. 0:25:54.800 --> 0:25:57.480 In the background, I can hear Joe pouring something into 0:25:57.480 --> 0:26:02.040 a glass. What is it that you're drinking? Oh, pino, Gricia, 0:26:03.560 --> 0:26:04.680 It's absolutely okay. 0:26:04.840 --> 0:26:05.080 Yeah. 0:26:05.160 --> 0:26:07.560 I sometimes think that I could tell what someone's drinking, 0:26:07.600 --> 0:26:09.920 but it's a little piccadillo of mine. I asked Joe 0:26:09.960 --> 0:26:13.040 about her family whether they are a bunch of magical thinkers, 0:26:13.320 --> 0:26:16.160 like say, someone who thinks he can tell what beverage 0:26:16.200 --> 0:26:19.720 someone is drinking over the phone. Maybe they've over indexed 0:26:19.760 --> 0:26:23.680 on this whole curse thing. Was your upbringing superstitious? Did 0:26:23.680 --> 0:26:25.800 your parents have rituals and stuff like that? 0:26:26.440 --> 0:26:28.480 Well, I was brought up on my grandparents. 0:26:29.080 --> 0:26:31.840 And then Joe tells me the reason she was raised 0:26:31.880 --> 0:26:32.880 by her grandparents. 0:26:33.800 --> 0:26:35.960 Our parents died when we were all very young. 0:26:37.480 --> 0:26:39.600 Your parents died around the same time. 0:26:40.320 --> 0:26:40.520 Yeah. 0:26:40.560 --> 0:26:41.960 Yeah, they died in a car accident. 0:26:42.119 --> 0:26:46.679 Oh my, I'm so sorry. Yeah, and they were together. 0:26:47.400 --> 0:26:47.600 Yeah. 0:26:47.680 --> 0:26:49.760 Yeah. 0:26:49.880 --> 0:26:52.760 Did that Has that ever struck you as a It 0:26:52.880 --> 0:26:53.760 was a bit of bad luck. 0:26:57.000 --> 0:27:00.480 It was really bad luck, right, I mean, the worst 0:27:00.560 --> 0:27:01.600 luck ever almost. 0:27:02.600 --> 0:27:04.600 Joe was only four years old at the time of 0:27:04.640 --> 0:27:08.000 the accident, so she doesn't remember the day, but she 0:27:08.040 --> 0:27:10.320 does remember learning about the death of her parents for 0:27:10.359 --> 0:27:11.080 the first time. 0:27:11.640 --> 0:27:13.360 I was able to read. So I must have been 0:27:13.400 --> 0:27:18.280 about six, and I've found a newspaper cutting in my 0:27:18.320 --> 0:27:21.760 grandmother's chest of drawers, and I could see that my 0:27:21.880 --> 0:27:24.200 name was in there, and my sister's name was in there, 0:27:24.840 --> 0:27:28.520 and I could see it as talking about two people, 0:27:29.400 --> 0:27:31.360 and I wasn't sure who theirs names were. 0:27:31.160 --> 0:27:32.520 But it sounded really sad to me. 0:27:32.640 --> 0:27:34.600 And it's had this really big long word at the 0:27:34.640 --> 0:27:37.080 top of it. So I went to mask my grandmother 0:27:37.119 --> 0:27:39.600 what it was, and she said, well that that word 0:27:39.840 --> 0:27:43.639 is an obituary, and these people are your mum and 0:27:43.720 --> 0:27:54.879 dad and their dad. I do have a few memories. 0:27:56.240 --> 0:27:57.680 So my dad used to go out to work. I 0:27:57.760 --> 0:28:01.560 used to have to help them put the socks on. Today, 0:28:02.240 --> 0:28:04.040 my dad went in to tell the teacher off in 0:28:04.119 --> 0:28:09.320 school because she was really horrible to me. And I 0:28:09.400 --> 0:28:11.440 remember being woking up in the middle of the night 0:28:11.560 --> 0:28:15.359 to come downstairs and see the new toys that my 0:28:15.640 --> 0:28:17.680 dad had brought home from work. It was a little 0:28:17.720 --> 0:28:22.159 red teeth set. I remember the first time I tested 0:28:22.240 --> 0:28:25.800 Chinese food because my mom was ill in bed and 0:28:25.960 --> 0:28:28.960 my dad brought me in to tasted Chinese food and 0:28:28.960 --> 0:28:31.639 there was pineapple on it, and I'd never had pineapple before. 0:28:39.760 --> 0:28:42.280 Joe says that after her parents' death, she and her 0:28:42.320 --> 0:28:45.800 six siblings were all split up, sent to different relatives. 0:28:46.200 --> 0:28:48.840 It took them many years, not until they were adults, 0:28:49.080 --> 0:28:53.200 to all reconnact. Do you think this this family trauma 0:28:53.400 --> 0:28:57.720 has kind of cast a Paul over David's kids. 0:28:59.240 --> 0:29:03.120 There is no day in our family that our parents' 0:29:03.120 --> 0:29:09.320 death was, oh my goodness, catastrophic. In a lot of ways. 0:29:09.400 --> 0:29:10.280 It was terrible. 0:29:10.920 --> 0:29:13.200 It's a big soddness, and I think they picked that 0:29:13.360 --> 0:29:15.560 up when you're a kid. 0:29:15.800 --> 0:29:18.320 It's a scary thing to learn that tragedy can strike 0:29:18.440 --> 0:29:22.000 at any moment for no reason, that there's no insulation 0:29:22.280 --> 0:29:25.840 between you and the darkness. Joe doesn't think the curse 0:29:25.960 --> 0:29:28.960 caused the accident, but the accident might have given the 0:29:29.040 --> 0:29:32.840 idea of a curse a certain allure. It offered an 0:29:32.920 --> 0:29:38.040 explanation for something unexplainable. Growing up, Dylan and his brothers 0:29:38.080 --> 0:29:41.480 heard about their grandparents' death. Were raised with the feeling 0:29:41.560 --> 0:29:44.000 of a vague dark cloud that hung over the family. 0:29:44.920 --> 0:29:48.520 But now they've given that dark cloud a name, the 0:29:48.600 --> 0:29:52.600 Curse of the Eliots. And what you can name, you 0:29:52.640 --> 0:29:56.840 can vanquish. What do you think that lifting the curse 0:29:57.000 --> 0:30:02.200 might change for David or for your nephews. 0:30:03.840 --> 0:30:04.520 It might. 0:30:06.120 --> 0:30:07.400 Gives a breathing space. 0:30:07.520 --> 0:30:09.440 And I don't know why I've said that word or 0:30:09.440 --> 0:30:13.360 that phrase, but that's just what it feels like. 0:30:12.320 --> 0:30:13.280 A breathing space. 0:30:14.200 --> 0:30:19.400 Yeah. 0:30:19.880 --> 0:30:22.880 Regardless of how Margaret Elliott or any of the three 0:30:22.960 --> 0:30:27.600 hundred thousand Elliots feel about the curse, these three Elliots, Dylan, 0:30:27.720 --> 0:30:31.480 Rory and Tim Elliott, they believe in it, and I'm 0:30:31.520 --> 0:30:35.240 going to help these elliots by lifting this curse once 0:30:35.280 --> 0:30:55.320 and for all. My greatest hope for lifting the curse 0:30:55.560 --> 0:30:59.280 lies with Elliott clan chief Margaret, who promised me a bishop. 0:31:00.000 --> 0:31:02.720 But at this point I haven't heard from Margaret in weeks, 0:31:03.240 --> 0:31:06.600 so I send an email asking for a progress report. 0:31:06.920 --> 0:31:11.640 When she replies, I'm surprised by her terseness. No bishop, 0:31:11.720 --> 0:31:14.760 She writes, I really think there is no point in 0:31:14.840 --> 0:31:18.000 pursuing this, and your friend who complained about his baldness 0:31:18.000 --> 0:31:20.200 and not growing cabbage will have to put up with 0:31:20.240 --> 0:31:24.680 it and not blame an entirely irrelevant sixteenth century curse. 0:31:26.320 --> 0:31:28.240 I'm not sure how to account for the shift in 0:31:28.320 --> 0:31:33.120 Margaret's tone until I read this. I would be grateful 0:31:33.240 --> 0:31:36.480 if you would not contact any more clan officers and 0:31:36.560 --> 0:31:40.160 alarm them unduly. It seems some of the elliots I 0:31:40.200 --> 0:31:43.920 spoke to, ever loyal to their chieftain, ratted me out, 0:31:44.600 --> 0:31:47.800 telling Margaret how I'd been pestering them about their bad luck. 0:31:48.680 --> 0:31:52.360 As chief, Margaret wants to protect her flock and not 0:31:52.400 --> 0:31:56.880 from the curse of the archbishop. But from me, it 0:31:56.920 --> 0:32:03.920 looks like I'm on my own on the Archdiocese of 0:32:03.960 --> 0:32:07.760 Glasgow's website, I find the name of the Archbishop's director 0:32:07.800 --> 0:32:12.000 of Communications, mister Confrey. Hi, thank you so much for 0:32:12.080 --> 0:32:12.600 talking to me. 0:32:12.720 --> 0:32:15.320 No problem at all. I'm glad to be able to chat. 0:32:15.680 --> 0:32:18.520 I explained to Ronnie Convrey about Dylan and his brothers, 0:32:18.920 --> 0:32:21.560 the robot muggings, the dog food factory. 0:32:22.080 --> 0:32:25.480 He's worried the curse from whatever five hundred years ago 0:32:25.520 --> 0:32:27.680 is affecting his daily life. 0:32:28.320 --> 0:32:34.480 Yes, hardy, harharr if you will, Ronnie Convrey, But I 0:32:34.560 --> 0:32:37.320 thought stuff that happened hundreds of years ago and still 0:32:37.320 --> 0:32:41.400 affects daily life is the Church's bread and butter. Of course, 0:32:41.440 --> 0:32:44.239 I'm too cowardly to actually say that, but I do 0:32:44.360 --> 0:32:48.240 say this, I'll be it mincingly. Why can't the archbishop 0:32:48.360 --> 0:32:50.840 just lift this one little old curse, just this one 0:32:50.920 --> 0:32:51.720 little old time. 0:32:52.440 --> 0:32:55.160 It's not going to happen. It's not like, you know, 0:32:55.200 --> 0:32:57.960 the archbishop puts on a stool and goes into the 0:32:58.000 --> 0:33:00.280 cathedral and mutters a few payers in lot and then 0:33:00.640 --> 0:33:03.600 sprinkle some holy water around and everything stakes. I mean, 0:33:04.240 --> 0:33:07.360 there is no such ceremony for lifting curses. 0:33:08.160 --> 0:33:10.920 And even if there were a ceremony, Ronnie says there's 0:33:10.960 --> 0:33:14.960 no one to perform at the last archbishop died just recently, 0:33:15.440 --> 0:33:18.400 and appointing a new one can take months, even years. 0:33:19.320 --> 0:33:21.160 Is this something that the Pope could lift? 0:33:22.720 --> 0:33:24.720 I had no idea, to be honest, I were you, 0:33:24.720 --> 0:33:26.600 I wouldn't waste trying to figure out how. 0:33:26.560 --> 0:33:29.800 You could speak to the Pope. You know you'd be 0:33:29.840 --> 0:33:30.120 here to. 0:33:30.160 --> 0:33:32.000 Goomsday and that you wouldn't get a nail the Pope 0:33:32.040 --> 0:33:32.640 on something like this. 0:33:33.040 --> 0:33:36.479 Yeah, he's a he's a busy man. I'm sure. I mean, 0:33:36.480 --> 0:33:38.640 it's not like you could just call the Vatican switchboard 0:33:38.640 --> 0:33:39.840 and has to speak to the Pope. 0:33:40.280 --> 0:33:41.000 Absolutely not. 0:33:47.080 --> 0:33:50.720 Turns out you can call the Vatican switchboard, but the 0:33:50.800 --> 0:33:58.040 problem not in Italiana. Is there anybody that spinks? 0:33:58.120 --> 0:33:58.239 Uh? 0:34:01.600 --> 0:34:03.920 My sisters taking English? It's okay? 0:34:07.440 --> 0:34:14.600 At yes, okay. I never imagined the Vatican to be 0:34:14.640 --> 0:34:17.319 the kind of mom and pop operation where you'd have 0:34:17.360 --> 0:34:19.480 to wait for somebody's sister to get back from her 0:34:19.560 --> 0:34:22.920 lunch break at the Vatican. Quiz No's when I phoned 0:34:22.960 --> 0:34:25.960 back Trey hours later, though the person who picks up 0:34:26.360 --> 0:34:29.680 doesn't know what I'm talking about. She was like, Yeah, 0:34:29.719 --> 0:34:31.759 my sister's going to be here, later. 0:34:32.719 --> 0:34:33.920 That sounds like Italy to me. 0:34:34.200 --> 0:34:37.120 Yeah, is that what it is? This is my gimlet 0:34:37.120 --> 0:34:41.080 coworker Valentina. She was born in Florence and speaks Italian, 0:34:41.280 --> 0:34:43.600 and agrees to help me. Phone back a few weeks later. 0:34:44.160 --> 0:34:45.800 Have you ever called the Vatican before? 0:34:46.560 --> 0:34:46.719 No. 0:34:48.320 --> 0:34:50.640 It turns out that while there isn't an office at 0:34:50.640 --> 0:34:53.640 the Vatican for curse removal, there is a department for 0:34:53.719 --> 0:34:57.359 papal blessings. Maybe a strong enough blessing can wipe out 0:34:57.360 --> 0:35:01.480 a curse. Love KOing hate kind of thing. So Valentine 0:35:01.520 --> 0:35:10.400 and I phone up the Office of Blessings. 0:35:08.520 --> 0:35:15.759 Yes, hello, okay a lot of. 0:35:17.719 --> 0:35:21.880 Valentina explains the details of my problem, the cabbages and cankers, 0:35:22.320 --> 0:35:24.880 but the operator says, we need a different department. 0:35:28.560 --> 0:35:30.239 It's an exorcism office. 0:35:30.760 --> 0:35:36.839 Oh so getting a curse lifted is that falls under 0:35:36.880 --> 0:35:39.439 the department of exorcism. 0:35:39.800 --> 0:35:43.520 Yeah, that's there's that's the old department that can you know, 0:35:43.640 --> 0:35:47.759 deal with that because we are exactly the oppos. 0:35:47.960 --> 0:35:53.920 You know, of course, bless you blessings are the opposite 0:35:53.920 --> 0:35:55.000 of courses. 0:35:58.920 --> 0:35:59.480 In general. 0:36:00.200 --> 0:36:02.400 So I call the switchboard back and ask for the 0:36:02.440 --> 0:36:07.359 Department of Exorcism. Why the operator asks, and so yet 0:36:07.400 --> 0:36:11.480 again I explained the ulcerated mouths, and Talento's. 0:36:11.520 --> 0:36:12.560 It's really absurd. 0:36:13.600 --> 0:36:14.120 Absurd. 0:36:14.560 --> 0:36:18.600 In twenty twenty one, we are still thinking about a 0:36:18.719 --> 0:36:29.000 curse dating back to fifteen twenty six. Oh it's five. 0:36:28.880 --> 0:36:32.160 Centuries, yes, and so it's about time. 0:36:33.040 --> 0:36:38.040 If both Francis hears about that, I don't know how 0:36:38.160 --> 0:36:39.000 he would react. 0:36:39.560 --> 0:36:40.640 How would he react? 0:36:41.400 --> 0:36:44.160 I don't think he will react in a good way. 0:36:44.600 --> 0:36:48.040 Are there special circumstances in which you know someone could 0:36:48.480 --> 0:36:49.400 speak to the Pope? 0:36:51.320 --> 0:36:55.840 It's not as easy, but it's happened, It may happen. 0:36:56.440 --> 0:36:57.440 It's not so easy. 0:36:57.600 --> 0:37:02.440 What are the circumstances in which you pass? Does he 0:37:02.480 --> 0:37:05.960 have a cell phone? Does the Pope have a cell phone? 0:37:06.000 --> 0:37:08.320 To people that he travels with have a cell phone? 0:37:08.400 --> 0:37:09.480 Is it just a landline? 0:37:09.800 --> 0:37:13.719 What do you want to I don't know what you 0:37:13.840 --> 0:37:14.719 really want to do. 0:37:15.960 --> 0:37:18.320 When I tell the operator about the original reason for 0:37:18.480 --> 0:37:20.680 my call that I want to be put through to 0:37:20.719 --> 0:37:24.520 the Department of Exorcisms, I learned there is no such department, 0:37:25.400 --> 0:37:28.839 or there is, but it's a department of one. There's 0:37:28.880 --> 0:37:32.480 only one exorcist for the entire Vatican. 0:37:33.840 --> 0:37:37.000 And he has a portable number. 0:37:37.760 --> 0:37:38.640 You want the number of the. 0:37:40.520 --> 0:37:47.840 Portable cellular device of the Pope's personal exorcist. Uh, yeah, yes, please, 0:37:49.120 --> 0:37:58.080 oh oh one, okay, thank you very much for your health. Yes, 0:37:58.400 --> 0:38:05.480 God bless thank you. Wow, it's really great. This is 0:38:05.520 --> 0:38:12.760 really great. So should we try the try the welcome 0:38:12.760 --> 0:38:13.960 to Verizon Wireless. 0:38:14.120 --> 0:38:16.759 Your call cannot be completed as the called party is 0:38:16.800 --> 0:38:18.160 temporarily unavailable. 0:38:20.719 --> 0:38:24.520 Is that a good sign? It's not a good sign. 0:38:25.200 --> 0:38:28.160 Once a week for the next eight weeks, Valentina and 0:38:28.200 --> 0:38:35.680 I try calling him back. The call never goes through. 0:38:36.400 --> 0:38:39.520 When I phone the Vatican switchboard again, the operator directs 0:38:39.560 --> 0:38:42.480 me to the Secretary General of the Diocese of Rome, 0:38:44.960 --> 0:38:48.440 who says I'll need to speak with a Padre Milily. No, 0:38:49.160 --> 0:38:54.600 Mi Lily. But Padre Mediately's secretary says he's not the 0:38:54.680 --> 0:39:00.719 right person either, apparently, since the curse effect not just 0:39:00.760 --> 0:39:04.560 the elliots of Rome or Dublin, but all elliots everywhere. 0:39:05.080 --> 0:39:08.000 My problem is an international problem. 0:39:08.120 --> 0:39:13.920 She says, we need to call the Association of International Exorcists. 0:39:14.040 --> 0:39:20.200 Oh, come on, it's called a ya aie Association internationalities. 0:39:21.560 --> 0:39:25.759 She just made that up. But it turns out that 0:39:25.840 --> 0:39:30.400 the International Association of Exorcists, has over eight hundred members, 0:39:30.640 --> 0:39:34.680 publishes guides for exorcists around the world, and is accredited 0:39:34.760 --> 0:39:38.960 by the Vatican. The AIE and I email back and forth, 0:39:39.400 --> 0:39:44.320 but eventually the Exorcists start giving me the brush off too. 0:39:49.320 --> 0:39:53.480 It's been nearly a year of unreturned emails, wrong numbers, 0:39:53.560 --> 0:39:57.000 and all around royal runarounds. I've been waking up at 0:39:57.000 --> 0:39:59.719 four am to call the Vatican so often that at 0:39:59.719 --> 0:40:03.520 this I'm basically on Italian time, which is kind of 0:40:03.600 --> 0:40:06.120 like being on a vacation in Italy with none of 0:40:06.120 --> 0:40:10.000 the Italy but all of the sleep deprivation. It's while 0:40:10.000 --> 0:40:12.600 complaining to my wife one day about how sleepy I 0:40:12.640 --> 0:40:15.680 am all the time, how badly my neck and back hurt, 0:40:16.000 --> 0:40:18.880 that I'm forced to ask myself did I have the 0:40:18.920 --> 0:40:22.359 Elliott Curse. If I did, it wouldn't be so bad 0:40:22.400 --> 0:40:25.600 if I had anything to show for it. As it is, though, 0:40:25.680 --> 0:40:28.319 I feel like I'm in a Dan Brown novel, but 0:40:28.400 --> 0:40:31.319 the boring parts like the table of contents or the 0:40:31.360 --> 0:40:35.520 author's note that nobody reads. And to add insult to injury, 0:40:35.840 --> 0:40:38.560 I've been at this so long that a new Archbishop 0:40:38.600 --> 0:40:42.080 of Glasgow has finally been installed. So I phone Ronnie 0:40:42.080 --> 0:40:45.359 Convrey and leave half a dozen messages over a number 0:40:45.440 --> 0:40:49.120 of weeks. When someone finally does pick up, rather than 0:40:49.120 --> 0:40:52.120 being granted an audience, I'm granted this. 0:40:52.760 --> 0:40:54.680 Good afternoon, Ar's Diocese of Glasgow. 0:40:55.200 --> 0:40:57.720 Hi, there is Ronnie Convy there. 0:40:59.320 --> 0:41:00.200 I believe he is. 0:41:00.239 --> 0:41:01.560 Can I ask who's calling? 0:41:01.960 --> 0:41:02.200 Sure? 0:41:02.239 --> 0:41:03.560 It's Jonathan Goldstein? 0:41:06.960 --> 0:41:07.120 Right? 0:41:07.200 --> 0:41:08.160 Can yield for a moment? 0:41:08.920 --> 0:41:09.360 Certainly? 0:41:11.800 --> 0:41:12.040 Hello? 0:41:12.360 --> 0:41:15.720 Yes, you must have stepped away from his desk. 0:41:17.760 --> 0:41:19.719 Do you think it would be okay to maybe try 0:41:19.800 --> 0:41:20.520 him a little later? 0:41:27.920 --> 0:41:32.000 His schedule is quite unpredictable, that's the only thing. He's 0:41:32.080 --> 0:41:33.160 in and out quite a bit. 0:41:33.520 --> 0:41:33.719 Yeah. 0:41:35.520 --> 0:41:39.200 The only thing left to do is admit defeat. Except 0:41:39.280 --> 0:41:43.000 for the fact that, unbeknownst to Ronnie Convrey, the Archbishop, 0:41:43.360 --> 0:41:47.080 the Vatican and even me, in the Battle of Goldstein 0:41:47.200 --> 0:42:00.239 versus the Curse, the curse was on the ropes. This 0:42:00.320 --> 0:42:03.080 might have been the heaviest weight yet. But that's the 0:42:03.200 --> 0:42:06.719 thing about heavy's weight. When you hoist them, there's no 0:42:06.840 --> 0:42:10.719 finer feeling. But the only thing I've succeeded in hoisting 0:42:11.040 --> 0:42:16.600 is myself by my own batards. And so, without another choice, 0:42:17.080 --> 0:42:19.160 I phoned Dylan to tell him I failed. 0:42:22.080 --> 0:42:24.840 Hello Dylan, Yeah, Hello, how are you? 0:42:25.920 --> 0:42:29.560 More importantly, how are you? It's been fourteen months since 0:42:29.640 --> 0:42:33.040 Dylan first reached out to me, Another cursed year has 0:42:33.080 --> 0:42:38.440 come and gone. The thought of how violently, excruciatingly Baldy 0:42:38.560 --> 0:42:41.640 must be at this point is frankly too much to bear. 0:42:42.600 --> 0:42:46.040 But what Dylan says next, you'll have to hear to believe. 0:42:46.880 --> 0:42:48.759 How are things really good? 0:42:48.880 --> 0:42:51.600 I've got a pretty great second half of a year, 0:42:51.640 --> 0:42:55.160 to be honest, really yeah, it's everything seems to be 0:42:55.160 --> 0:42:55.879 going a bit better. 0:42:55.960 --> 0:42:58.440 You know, well, you sound different. I mean, your energy 0:42:58.480 --> 0:42:59.080 feels different. 0:42:59.719 --> 0:43:02.240 Y seem totally different. I feel kind of much much better. 0:43:03.000 --> 0:43:05.359 I was kind of one a minute. Was there anything 0:43:05.360 --> 0:43:06.359 in the background, of course? 0:43:06.480 --> 0:43:06.680 Wise? 0:43:06.800 --> 0:43:08.759 Because that's a really really good second half of the year. 0:43:09.760 --> 0:43:12.839 I never dreamt of hearing the words really good, let 0:43:12.880 --> 0:43:16.400 alone really really good come from the mouth of Dylan Elliott. 0:43:17.080 --> 0:43:20.520 What was going on? And on top of that, it's 0:43:20.560 --> 0:43:22.400 not just Dylan who's been feeling better. 0:43:22.800 --> 0:43:25.560 It's on some quite good shape at the moment. Like 0:43:25.600 --> 0:43:29.440 I mean, my brother Tim, he's accepted onto a PhD 0:43:29.600 --> 0:43:33.520 course and he's got funding for it. It's going fantastic. 0:43:33.840 --> 0:43:36.839 This is Tim using the word fantastic. 0:43:37.480 --> 0:43:44.240 I'm suddenly working for myself, meeting offs of new interesting people, 0:43:46.520 --> 0:43:47.879 having a really lovely time. 0:43:48.680 --> 0:43:50.880 Is there a moment where you feel like things started 0:43:50.920 --> 0:43:51.320 to turn? 0:43:52.120 --> 0:43:55.640 I think probably beginning a still year in September, so. 0:43:55.680 --> 0:43:58.920 Like in the fall. Yeah, this is a different you know, 0:43:59.000 --> 0:44:03.440 a different Tim from when I spoke to you last Yes. Yes, 0:44:03.840 --> 0:44:08.200 no muggings in the past year, zero zero muggings. That's 0:44:08.239 --> 0:44:19.719 a net positive. How are things for Rory? 0:44:20.440 --> 0:44:22.359 Oh, Rory's having a great time. 0:44:22.440 --> 0:44:24.440 He just sent me a picture He's made. 0:44:24.320 --> 0:44:26.880 Friends with a donkey. I think it is. 0:44:26.920 --> 0:44:28.319 It's very small. 0:44:28.400 --> 0:44:30.240 So what what? 0:44:30.000 --> 0:44:30.040 What? 0:44:30.239 --> 0:44:31.759 What? What does that mean? 0:44:33.920 --> 0:44:36.800 When you just it's certainly a picture of. 0:44:36.920 --> 0:44:40.520 Him and his friend, who is a donkey. 0:44:40.600 --> 0:44:41.239 I guess. 0:44:41.840 --> 0:44:44.320 Okay, where where is Rory? 0:44:44.480 --> 0:44:47.640 I've moved to the West of Ireland. I'm really happy. 0:44:47.880 --> 0:44:51.480 This is Rory living here with my partner, the donkey, 0:44:52.320 --> 0:44:56.319 injury free. What about the mouth ulcers? Have they cleared up? 0:44:56.960 --> 0:44:59.040 I don't have any any of them. 0:44:59.040 --> 0:45:05.000 Incredible For months, and perhaps most importantly and to my mind, 0:45:05.080 --> 0:45:06.560 most insanely. 0:45:06.560 --> 0:45:11.320 My ability to grow cabbages as really improved. Like this season, 0:45:11.600 --> 0:45:13.520 my cabbages have been amazing. 0:45:13.800 --> 0:45:18.200 And as a victory, lap Rory made wine from cabbages. 0:45:18.920 --> 0:45:23.360 Mean it tastes like really strongly alcoholic fermented cabbage juice. 0:45:23.600 --> 0:45:24.320 That's fair City. 0:45:25.280 --> 0:45:28.239 When I just looked up cabbage wine, it seems as 0:45:28.280 --> 0:45:31.719 though like one makes it with sixty percent cabbages and 0:45:31.760 --> 0:45:32.880 forty percent grapes. 0:45:33.440 --> 0:45:34.480 I'm filled cabbage. 0:45:34.600 --> 0:45:36.680 You're going one hundred percent cabbage. 0:45:37.239 --> 0:45:38.080 I'm fill cabbage. 0:45:39.400 --> 0:45:42.600 Dylan sounds like a new man. Tim's doing his PhD. 0:45:43.440 --> 0:45:47.320 Rory's dating a donkey. Even the Reaver Pub in Carlisle 0:45:47.360 --> 0:45:52.719 that closed down just this year it reopened. What has changed? 0:45:53.640 --> 0:45:55.960 Was it merely my trying to get the curse lifted 0:45:56.000 --> 0:45:59.560 that perhaps weakened. It is lifting a curse like attempting 0:45:59.600 --> 0:46:02.640 to open a pickle jar when it's just so impossible 0:46:02.719 --> 0:46:05.120 that you give up and accept that you're never going 0:46:05.120 --> 0:46:08.360 to eat pickles ever again. But then someone comes along 0:46:08.440 --> 0:46:11.200 and pops it open. No problem because of all your 0:46:11.360 --> 0:46:16.000 hard work. Had I loosen the pickle jar? I returned 0:46:16.000 --> 0:46:19.279 to the Elliott Clan Society web page to reread the 0:46:19.320 --> 0:46:23.759 curse for clues. Maybe while high stepping around like a jackass, 0:46:23.800 --> 0:46:27.840 I'd inadvertently, Crane kicked some satanic goblin in the privates, 0:46:28.320 --> 0:46:31.360 knocking him into a key structural beam of the Curse's 0:46:31.400 --> 0:46:35.400 complex architecture. But when I get to the Curse's website, 0:46:35.640 --> 0:46:38.920 I'm shocked by what I find, because what I find 0:46:39.760 --> 0:46:44.880 is nothing. In big block letters across the screen, it 0:46:45.000 --> 0:46:51.480 reads error four O four page not found. The curse 0:46:52.160 --> 0:46:54.040 has been removed. 0:47:01.840 --> 0:47:02.120 Hello. 0:47:02.640 --> 0:47:04.680 Hello, is this miss Elliott. 0:47:05.360 --> 0:47:07.040 This is Marlbur's idiot speaking here. 0:47:07.560 --> 0:47:11.120 And so I phone Margaret Elliott, chief of the Elliott 0:47:11.120 --> 0:47:15.240 Clan Society slash web page. Oh hello, this is Jonathan 0:47:15.239 --> 0:47:18.200 Goldstein calling. I don't know if you remember me, the 0:47:19.200 --> 0:47:20.319 American podcaster. 0:47:21.840 --> 0:47:23.000 Yes, yes, I remember. 0:47:23.520 --> 0:47:23.680 Hi. 0:47:24.080 --> 0:47:26.719 I'm sorry to bother you. Might you just have a 0:47:26.760 --> 0:47:29.840 couple of minutes to speak? I just had a I mean. 0:47:29.920 --> 0:47:33.480 Yes, I've got I'm not terribly keen on talking about 0:47:33.480 --> 0:47:34.440 this curse anymore. 0:47:35.600 --> 0:47:38.720 I long for the olden days when Margaret was terribly 0:47:38.840 --> 0:47:40.600 keen on talking about this curse. 0:47:43.800 --> 0:47:46.520 Perfect well, I mean I could to get somebody on 0:47:46.560 --> 0:47:46.879 the phone. 0:47:48.880 --> 0:47:50.480 My middle name is Stewart. 0:47:50.680 --> 0:47:51.680 You've inspired me. 0:47:54.400 --> 0:47:58.200 Now all I have is a dumb old montage. I've 0:47:58.200 --> 0:48:00.880 made enough calls to people desperate get off the phone 0:48:00.920 --> 0:48:02.879 with me to know that I only have a few 0:48:02.880 --> 0:48:06.200 minutes before Margaret hangs up. So I launched right into 0:48:06.200 --> 0:48:09.400 my question why was the curse taken down from the 0:48:09.400 --> 0:48:10.839 Elliot Clan website? 0:48:11.280 --> 0:48:12.680 I asked for it to be taken down. 0:48:14.000 --> 0:48:17.319 Uh, just had a pure curiosity. Was it taken down 0:48:17.360 --> 0:48:17.880 because of me? 0:48:20.440 --> 0:48:20.680 Yes? 0:48:20.840 --> 0:48:23.960 I think you probably triggered something and maybe think all 0:48:24.000 --> 0:48:27.640 the more deeply a budget and that I wanted to anyway, 0:48:27.760 --> 0:48:30.280 So yes, it was you, awfulled. 0:48:33.320 --> 0:48:37.040 It wasn't my ability to procure a papal blessing, archbishop's 0:48:37.040 --> 0:48:40.920 recantation or priestly exorcism that in the end got rid 0:48:40.920 --> 0:48:44.480 of the curse. It was simply my ability to be annoying. 0:48:45.280 --> 0:48:49.400 I annoyed that curse right out of existence on the internet. 0:48:49.880 --> 0:48:51.560 It was all due to you. 0:48:51.560 --> 0:48:55.120 You mean, knew take responsibility, I mean not to not 0:48:55.239 --> 0:48:56.560 to you know, take all the credit. 0:48:56.640 --> 0:48:59.720 But yeah, yeah, did take all the credit. 0:48:59.760 --> 0:49:07.000 Why since the Elliot brother's luck began improving in the fall, 0:49:07.360 --> 0:49:11.680 I run my donning theory about why by Margaret, I wonder, well, 0:49:11.719 --> 0:49:15.080 this might seem silly to you, but might it correspond 0:49:15.120 --> 0:49:18.560 to the fact that the curse was taken off the website. 0:49:18.840 --> 0:49:20.520 I wouldn't think so. 0:49:21.520 --> 0:49:25.320 No, but the intersection of the Elliot brothers change in 0:49:25.440 --> 0:49:28.279 luck and the change in the web page is just 0:49:28.320 --> 0:49:32.000 too tantalizing for me to let go of. So I 0:49:32.040 --> 0:49:34.960 can't help but continue to toe dance on Margaret's last 0:49:35.000 --> 0:49:40.040 remaining nerve. Do you remember the day that it was removed? No? 0:49:40.320 --> 0:49:48.800 I did, Like I remember, do not put the two together. 0:49:50.840 --> 0:49:54.279 Dylan Elliott's luck started to change around the end of 0:49:54.360 --> 0:49:58.040 last year. I think the fall going into winter was 0:49:58.080 --> 0:49:59.040 that I'm. 0:49:58.880 --> 0:50:01.879 Not going to be sucked to this. I just absolutely 0:50:01.960 --> 0:50:03.560 think it's entirely relevant. 0:50:04.040 --> 0:50:08.320 But was that that wasn't around the generally the. 0:50:08.239 --> 0:50:11.879 Okay, when I hope this is all done and dusted now, yes, 0:50:11.920 --> 0:50:15.640 I think so good? Great, all right, have a nice day. 0:50:15.800 --> 0:50:22.000 Okay, Yes, and tutelou, as they they. 0:50:21.880 --> 0:50:24.480 Say, exactly, we say that all the time. 0:50:26.160 --> 0:50:29.759 After speaking with Margaret, I searched the Internet archives and 0:50:29.800 --> 0:50:32.680 discover in fact that indeed the page of the curse 0:50:32.920 --> 0:50:42.600 was removed around the time of the Elliot's change in fortune. Okay, 0:50:42.760 --> 0:50:45.200 now I'm going to ask you to try to find 0:50:45.719 --> 0:50:51.719 that page about the Elliott curse. Together, Dylan and I 0:50:51.800 --> 0:50:54.080 turned to the page of the curse on the Elliott 0:50:54.120 --> 0:50:55.920 Clan website. 0:51:00.239 --> 0:51:01.560 Gone, let me see. 0:51:01.920 --> 0:51:02.680 What do you see? 0:51:03.120 --> 0:51:05.799 I can't find that page. 0:51:06.080 --> 0:51:10.040 That's right, you can't find it. It's been removed. 0:51:10.440 --> 0:51:13.040 Why how comes lifted? 0:51:14.000 --> 0:51:17.239 Lifted? Not from reality technically, but from the. 0:51:17.239 --> 0:51:19.600 Internet twenty first century. 0:51:21.600 --> 0:51:23.799 Can we just at this point safely say that the 0:51:23.880 --> 0:51:24.880 curse has been lifted? 0:51:26.080 --> 0:51:28.680 I mean, yeah, actually definitely can. I think? 0:51:29.680 --> 0:51:31.879 And when I ask Rory if he buys the whole 0:51:31.880 --> 0:51:36.080 internet exorsus my idea scientist that he is, he carefully 0:51:36.120 --> 0:51:38.200 analyzes the empirical evidence. 0:51:38.880 --> 0:51:42.040 I mean, you know, it's definitely possible. 0:51:42.960 --> 0:51:44.480 You know, in fact, it's probable. 0:51:45.280 --> 0:51:46.960 In fact, I think it's definitely the case. 0:51:52.719 --> 0:51:55.840 Next time I'm in Carlisle, I'd like to buy you 0:51:55.880 --> 0:51:56.920 a pint at the Reaver. 0:51:56.880 --> 0:52:00.279 Pub, you know, yeah, I'd like to offer you a 0:52:00.320 --> 0:52:02.080 glasses champaign. 0:52:06.760 --> 0:52:08.719 Plans with the girlfriend to go off to brying a 0:52:08.760 --> 0:52:09.279 camper van. 0:52:09.440 --> 0:52:12.759 Very shortly, here's Dylan again, a camper van. 0:52:13.040 --> 0:52:14.640 Yeah, we're going to take it in the road and 0:52:14.680 --> 0:52:18.560 kindick with traveling. It's just feeling the immense feeling of freedom. 0:52:18.840 --> 0:52:20.200 It's been kind of incredible. 0:52:22.320 --> 0:52:24.560 Are the Elliott Boys better off for anything I did? 0:52:25.080 --> 0:52:28.919 Who knows? And frankly, at this point, they probably don't 0:52:28.920 --> 0:52:32.239 even care. When things are going well, we don't think 0:52:32.280 --> 0:52:34.719 too hard about the why of it. It's only when 0:52:34.760 --> 0:52:37.400 things are bad that we do. That's when we seek 0:52:37.400 --> 0:52:41.719 out therapists to analyze and exorcist to exercise. When things 0:52:41.719 --> 0:52:44.680 are going well, we just enjoy them for as long 0:52:44.760 --> 0:52:47.480 as they last, which usually isn't very long at all. 0:52:48.440 --> 0:52:52.560 But for now, there's breathing space. When is your girlfriend 0:52:52.600 --> 0:52:53.040 do over? 0:52:53.560 --> 0:52:53.719 Oh? 0:52:54.520 --> 0:52:55.080 Imminently? 0:52:56.080 --> 0:52:56.239 Oh? 0:52:56.280 --> 0:52:58.920 Okay, enjoy the rest of your day with your girlfriend. 0:52:59.360 --> 0:53:02.280 Thanks a million, that's quickly, Okay. 0:53:01.800 --> 0:53:29.040 Take it easy, Dylan, bye bye. 0:53:34.440 --> 0:53:40.200 Now that the furnitures returning to its good will home, 0:53:43.719 --> 0:53:50.200 now that the last month's rent is skiming with the damaged, possible. 0:53:50.000 --> 0:53:52.000 Take this moment to dissolve. 0:53:54.600 --> 0:53:59.920 If we met him, if we tried, we felt around 0:54:00.160 --> 0:54:01.000 for five. 0:54:03.480 --> 0:54:11.200 From the names at Accid and Leaves. This episode of 0:54:11.239 --> 0:54:15.239 Heavyweight was produced by supervising producer Stevie Lane and me 0:54:15.520 --> 0:54:19.480 Jonathan Goldstein, along with Mohemy mcgauker. Our senior producer is 0:54:19.520 --> 0:54:24.080 Khalila Holt. Special thanks to Emily Condon, Alex Bloomberg, Valentina Powers, 0:54:24.120 --> 0:54:28.879 Max Green, Domiano Marquetti, and Jackie Cohen. Bobby Lord mixed 0:54:28.920 --> 0:54:32.240 the episode with original music by Christine Fellows, John K. Sampson, 0:54:32.360 --> 0:54:36.719 Michael Hurst, Sean Jacoby, Blue Dot Sessions, and he himself, 0:54:37.280 --> 0:54:40.560 Bobby Lord. Additional music credits can be found on our website, 0:54:40.600 --> 0:54:44.160 Gimletmedia dot com slash Heavyweight. Our theme song is by 0:54:44.160 --> 0:54:47.440 the Weaker Than's courtesy of Epitaph Records. Follow us on 0:54:47.480 --> 0:54:51.080 Twitter at Heavyweight. This was the last episode of the season, 0:54:51.200 --> 0:54:54.200 but we're already looking for stories for next year. So 0:54:54.239 --> 0:54:56.399 if there's a moment from your past that you need 0:54:56.480 --> 0:54:59.560 help resolving, please send us an email at Heavyweight at 0:54:59.560 --> 0:55:03.360 gimlet media dot com. Have a happy and safe holiday season? 0:55:04.280 --> 0:55:04.920 Uh? 0:55:05.080 --> 0:55:06.799 Should I ask Aggie if he wants to come up 0:55:06.800 --> 0:55:09.200 here and wish everyone a happy holiday season? 0:55:09.239 --> 0:55:09.560 Ai? 0:55:09.880 --> 0:55:13.160 Do you want to be in the credits? Have a 0:55:13.200 --> 0:55:15.800 happy and safe holiday season, Ogi 0:55:16.640 --> 0:55:26.680 And will see you next y