#300: Summer Bucket List

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Emma

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You're listening to the Beautiful Mess podcast, your cozy comfort listen. I'm your host, Emma Chapman.

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Elsie

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And I'm your host, Elsie Larson.

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Emma

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And this week we're sharing what's on our summer bucket list, and we are discussing a hot take about

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shoe-free rules in homes. I wondered when the shoe-free rule was going to come up.

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Elsie

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Not the take off your shoes. Debate. Oh boy, this is a sensitive topic.

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Emma

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This is when people stop being friends. This is a problem. No, I'm just kidding.

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Elsie

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I love it. I love the topic. Okay, so before we jump in, we wanted to make a note to you that we are

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going to do summer episodes. Thank you for sending your ideas. Send them, send them to us anytime

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at podcasts@beautifulmess.com We love to hear them. I'm in charge of making the outlines, and that's

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pretty much the only place I get ideas from, is your emails. So, thank you for.. and we get like a wide

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variety. It's really interesting. Thank you to everyone who sends us book recommendations.

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Emma

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You don't know how much money I've spent on thrift books because of you. Never stop, never change.

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Elsie

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Yeah, like my whole library, my dining room is almost full, and it's almost all thrift books, so it's a

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wonderful situation.

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Emma

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Yeah, and just so many front.. I'm like, oh yeah, podcast listener told me about this.

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Elsie

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And I do notice the people who come in over and over recommending the same book, and that does

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mean that we'll read it faster. So, good job for you.

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Emma

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It does.

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Elsie

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I like the passion. So, anyway, yeah, we just wanted to reassure you, we are doing summer. If we get

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every single week 10 gold stars for us, if we get most weeks eight gold stars, if we do the best we can, I

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think that's fine too. We're gonna try, we're gonna try to get every single week, but basically we're just

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gonna do our best. And when it's september 1, then we'll have the promised every single week again.

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Do you think that's fair?

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Emma

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Yeah, that's good. That's good.

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Elsie

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I'm gonna need a one star review for saying that. I don't know, I'm so scared.

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Emma

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Guess what, I'll never read it.

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Elsie

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I will. I will.

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Emma

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I don't know why you do. One star, because you just tried your best, and it wasn't good enough for me. I

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don't care.

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Elsie

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Okay, we're off on the wrong foot. Okay, let's go, let's get back on track. So every season we do our

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bucket list for the season. So this is summer. It is almost summer now. My children are getting out of

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school at the time this episode goes up, they will be out of school a couple days from now. This Friday

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is their last day of school, which is crazy. So, I like to be prepared, I like to have ideas, and I like to have

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personal things, I think, too, but I am a summer mom, so I am. My kids are not in camps, they're not in

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summer school, they are with me the entire summer, and it's like it's special. It's special. I didn't know

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how special this part of parenthood was going to be. It's not a thing that people prepared me for. The

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first year my kid got out of kindergarten, and we no longer had daycare, I was just like, what? So, what

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do we do? What if.. wait a second to figure it out quick. Yep. Okay, so we're each gonna go back and

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forth and share five things on our summer bucket list. And by the way, if you've never made a bucket

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list, all you need is like, rip a little piece of paper out of your journal, write down all the things you want

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to do, stick it on your fridge, and highlight them as you go throughout the summer, and hopefully it's just

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a reminder to do more things that you already want to do.

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Emma

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And we have some on our site, just type in bucket list to our search bar, and you'll find some, and

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there's also much more clearly can be found better, you know, organized over on childhoodmagic.com

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Elsie

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Yeah, go there, childhoodmagic.com has really good printables for parents. So that's a good, especially

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if you have toddlers or like lower elementary school age children. Go to childhoodmagic.com and print

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out there is just like 100 things you can print.

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Emma

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Speaking of summer and needing things to do with your kids, go to Childhoodmagic.com because

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there's tons of stuff on there.

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Elsie

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You can do Emma's slime Recipe, it'll be magical.

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Emma

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Done it with my kids many times. All right, so we're just gonna do five. So I'll say my first one. Okay, so

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my first one is kind of an ongoing all summer long thing, and I've also started it, but I feel like I haven't

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talked about another episode, so I'm putting it here, and it is that I am on sabbatical. Okay, what does

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that mean? Yes. Well, what does that mean? So, a couple episodes ago, our friend Katie Day was a

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guest on the show, and if you didn't listen to that one, go back and listen to it, because she will change

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your life in five minutes. That's the premise of the episode, and it's really good. And anyway, after we

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recorded that, we were sitting around eating lunch, eating the sandwich, if you know, you know, and I

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was explaining some things going on in my life, and Katie was like, "Why don't you go on sabbatical

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until Hugo is back in daycare, which will be like July, August, maybe September, we don't know,

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something like that.

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Elsie

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That's soon.

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Emma

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It is soon. It is. It's basically like I have the summer now, because I've already had like a month, one

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month since I started doing this, and then the summer, so it's like it's like three to four months if you

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need to know a time. So, anyway, as soon as she said it, something in my brain was like, yes, exactly,

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that's what I should do, because I was just feeling very burnt out, very blocked creatively, and then work

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is just weird. Work is in a real transition time, not this podcast. Everything's fine with the podcast, don't

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worry about that, just other things in my life. So, yeah, so I was like, yes, I'm going to do that, because I

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might as well. It's so hard to get work done with the little 15 hours a week I have anyway, so I'm going

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to focus on some what I think of as like sabbatical task, and they're kind of just fun things, but mainly

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what I'm doing is I'm doing the book The Artist Way, which, if you've never done it, I'm sure you've

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heard us talk about it. I have like three copies in my home, so it's from Julia Cameron. It's, it's really,

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really good. It is kind of spiritual. If that bothers you, just change the language. I promise it's worth it. It's

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for everyone. It's not just for spiritual people. It's for anyone who is creative, which, by the way, is

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everyone. So, anyway, I'm doing the Artist's Way, and I feel like that gives me enough time to do the

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activities and the writing prompts and the morning pages with the time that I have. So, I'm doing that,

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and from starting that, I got inspired to write a series of short stories, so I'm doing that. That's kind of

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what I'm writing right now. Don't plan to publish it, I just am writing them. I've also been reading a ton of

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short story collections, so I'm sure in some upcoming episodes I'll share some of those. So, if you like

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short stories, get ready, because I have some bangers, and I'm also doing a paint by number, and also

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just kind of enjoying my time. Like, there was a day I drove to Buffalo, Missouri, which is about 40

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minutes away, and I got this pizza that's my childhood pizza.

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Elsie

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I was just thinking of that pizza.

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Emma

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Yeah, I think about that pizza all the time, and I never take the time to go there, because our grandma

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doesn't live there anymore, so there's really no reason to go to Buffalo, but I just went. There's one

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reason, there's one reason, and I got the pizza, and I also drove to Lewisburg, which is right by it, which

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is where our mom's from and grew up. Anyway, it was just like my own little no real reason to do this,

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definitely quote unquote wasting my time, but I just, it meant something to me, and so I'm doing things

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like that on this, like, sabbatical time, and again, it's really only 15 hours a week. I still take care of my

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kids, I still do this podcast. I'm not really disappearing. I feel like when you say sabbatical, I'm not doing

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it properly, but I'm doing it enough for me, and for my life, and for my needs, and for what I can't do, and

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I'm very happy with that choice, so I'm doing that this whole summer. Hopefully, I'll have the short story

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collection done by the end of the summer. Again, I'm not planning to publish it. Maybe I'll put it in my

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newsletter. I don't really know. I don't have a plan for it. That's sort of part of it for me, is I need to create

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something that's like just for me and just for the sake of being creative. So I don't really have any plans

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for it. It's not because I have a hard no on that. I'm just not thinking of that part. It's not important to me.

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It's just the making right now that's really matters to me. So, anyway.

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Elsie

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That's beautiful. It sounds like you're having like a cozy self-care.

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Emma

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I'm already feeling a lot just like happier around my kids, more creative, just more at peace. I think I was

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starting to feel very like frantic, it was maybe the word I would use, and I don't really have a reason why.

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I think I was just trying to do so many things in these little pockets of time, and after a certain amount of

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time of that, like a year of that, I was like, I'm feeling frantic, and I just need a little reset, I need a little

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reset, and a little rest, and that's what sabbatical is. So that's what I'm doing.

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Elsie

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I think it's very confusing when you put a lot of your identity in your work to then go through a season

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when your career changes and you're doing a lot of childcare, because childcare, you like, you don't

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necessarily get the affirmation that you get in career, you know, and you just don't get the same signals

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that you're doing a different job.

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Emma

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I don't think of my kids as my career.

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Elsie

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It's a completely different kind of rewards. And anyway, I think what you're feeling is extremely valid and

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relatable.

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Emma

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So that's my first one. Sabbatical summer.

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Elsie

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Nice. Well, I'm excited to hear how it goes. We should do an Artist Way episode. Don't let me forget.

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Okay, my first goal is to take a family vacation to New England. So, I've been talking about this for a

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while. I think in August we're gonna go to Block Island, but I kind of just want to like explore Rhode

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Island. Yeah, I'm just curious to. I've never been, I don't think, to Rhode Island, and the children are

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really excited to go to an island where you have to take a ferry. They've never had that experience

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before, so that'll be exciting. Last weekend, our family went to just a little hotel in Arkansas, and we

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went to the Crystal Bridges Museum and stuff, and it was, it was. Really nice, and the kids like loved it.

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So, I realized they're at the perfect age now for more little family adventures, and so I'm excited to do

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that.

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Emma

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I love it. Well, speaking of little family adventures, the next thing on my list is we are going to do a family

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night in Branson. All right, if you don't know what Branson, Missouri, is. Go ahead and stop right now.

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Pull over your car, Google it, because it is very charming and very country - that's the word I would use

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for it.

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Elsie

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It has a lot going on. It's 30 minutes from our home.

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Emma

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It's very close.

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Elsie

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We've grown up with it has theme parks, it has old people attraction.

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Emma

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Has shows has lots of stuff for kids. So we're planning to do like a drive up there after nap, after Hugo's

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nap, probably wake him up a little early because he's a strong napper, and go to this water park, I want

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to say it's like called the Grand Canyon Grand, I don't know what it's called, it's a water park, and it has

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like indoors and outdoor parts. It has a lot of splash pad area, like this tree house area. I think my kids

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will love that. And then it has attached to it is a hotel that has like kid bunk beds, like a kid fort. It's like a

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bunk bed that kind of has its own little wall that comes down, and I think Oscar will love that. Hugo

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might not sleep in the bunk bed, he might. He's still a little bit like pack and play, could be in a bed, still

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sleeps in his crib, though. So, we'll see. But at any rate, Oscar just loves being in hotels. He's a little kid,

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so he just thinks that's magical anywhere. So, he will love this. And I just wanted to do something with

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the kids this summer that's like very special, but it's also like easy on us as parents, because I did just

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take them to Disney, and that was great, but that was not easy on me as a parent. That was a lot of

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work for me, and so I want to kind of do something that's like summer fun family, but not so hard for me

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and Trey. We'll probably also do a camping night, but that's going to be more in the fall, so it's not on

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the summer bucket list. Branson, love it.

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Elsie

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Branson's fun, Branson's super fun. We usually go in the summer with our, my husband's side of the

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family. It's all right, it's got its ups and downs. Yeah, man. So my second goal is to work on my summer

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reading goals. So I have my own summer reading goal. I just want to like get ahead. Last year I did not

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make my reading goal, and it really bothered me. It was like the first year out of four years in a row that

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I didn't make it, and I, I know why it was. It was because I was spent so much time writing, but I, I don't

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know, I just, I really like getting my goal. So, yeah, it's motivating, so I think if I get more ahead in the

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summer this year, like this is my moment to be in, you know, a lot of audio books, a lot of sitting on the

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porch, reading things like that, reading at the pool. Yeah, the pool is the best.

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Emma

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Your kids are an age for that. My kids are still in the death zone so no reading at the pool for me.

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Elsie

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Yeah, Emma's not reading at the pool at all. My kids are strong swimmers, and it's the greatest. The

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last couple years is just, it's the greatest. It's such a big moment. So, yeah, and then my children do the

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summer reading program from the public library, and they absolutely love it. They get cupcakes and

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stuff, and it's very fun for them, so I'm going to still encourage that. And this year we are doing a hybrid

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of, so last year we did mostly audio books, so if you didn't know, the children are legally blind and they

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cannot, they basically can't read paper books without extra tools, so and there as their age gets older

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the books type just gets smaller and smaller, so it wasn't as much of a problem a few years ago. And

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then now that we're all on chapter books, it's a very big problem. So they both have their own Kindle

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this year, so we're trying - we're gonna try a Kindle summer, in addition to the audio books, which are

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totally fine, and they totally count as reading. We're also gonna try Kindle, because they're just very

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excited to each have their own. We did a craft day where we decorated the cases, so that was very

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cute, and they're just very proud of them. So I need to load them up and get a lot of books on there.

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Emma

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You can change the font? I guess I don't really even know.

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Elsie

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The font, I have a picture of their ideal font. I'll show you in a minute, but it, it goes very large, so Kindle

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can do that.Yes, it goes very large. It's very accessible for people with low vision. It's great. And then we

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have the paper, I think it's called Paper White, so they kind of have like a mat. They're very good in the

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dark, like they're just, they're not too bright for people reading, in which is when they read, mostly is like

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in their bed at night. So, yeah, I'm really excited. I will say how it goes at the end of the summer, if the

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Kindle helps or not, because I would love for them to love more than just audio books, and I want to

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encourage that, but at the end of the day, they kind of have to pick what they want to read, yeah, like

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they have to have their own motivation. So, we'll see.

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Emma

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Okay, my next one is I am making just for fun. This kind of goes along with my sabbatical summer that I

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just told you about. I'm making a digital collage project, so I've kind of already started it, so it's

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essentially about the monotony and anxiety that I sometimes feel with feeding little kids, because you

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know, just for any, any moms out there, you'll get it, but it's just, it's a lot of the same things over and

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over, it's a lot of like planning and buying and making food, and the food doesn't get eaten, and it gets

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thrown away, and did they eat enough, or you know, am I feeding them the right things, and just a lot

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that goes into feeding little kids, you know, as your kids grow up, they start to feed themselves, and

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that's a whole different thing, and I'm not at that level yet. I wanted to make a piece of art, I've had this

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on my mind for a long time, that's just about the monotony and the anxiety of feeding little kids, and so

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I'm making this kind of digital collage, I started saving a bunch of packaging from their food, I cleaned it

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too, and so it's like it's like the box of graham crackers, or they have these little like healthy fig newtons,

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they like to eat all the time, we call them breakfast bars, packaging from that, cheese sticks, you know,

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just packaging from stuff, and I scanned it all, and I scanned it, so that it's very.. the idea to me is like

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the process of making this piece of art is very tedious, because to me that's like kind of the process of

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feeding little kids, is it's very tedious, it's not hard, but it's tedious, and it's a lot of the same thing over

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and over, and so I would take, like for example, a cheese stick packaging, and I scanned it, and then I

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used the same paper, and I scanned another one next to it, over and over and over, until I filled the

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entire page. And, of course, what this also did is there's like slight imperfections. You, when you look at

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it, it does look very grid-like, but it's also like there's one that's like slightly off or slightly curled, or

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whatever. So, in a way, I feel like the final piece is probably going to look a little bit like digital pop art in

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a way, and I'm not planning to do anything with it, other than I'm going to display it in my home. I have a

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spot in my dining room, I want to hang it, but I'm not planning to share it or sell it or anything. It's just

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something that means something to me. Yeah, fun working on it, and it's really fun to work on, but, like I

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said, it is very tedious. Yeah, I don't know, interesting. Just something I had in my mind, and so I'm

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making it for fun.

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Elsie

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Nice. Yeah. No, that's that is very interesting. I'm surprised. I like it. Okay, I am going to take on the task

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this summer of teaching my kids basic skills, so I saw this printable or something on Pinterest, and it

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was like how to be a person, and it was like learning to clip your nails, learning to cook like ramen,

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make sure, like, think just make toast, a load of laundry, yeah, yeah, wash the dishes properly, so that I

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don't have to do it again immediately. So, yeah, that will be challenging. That'll be challenging, and I will

00:04:06.000 --> 00:04:07.000
say I have noticed at my kids' ages that I am doing more for them than I should be still, and I think

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because of like a combination of their vision and just my own bad habits that I didn't habits or habits,

00:04:08.000 --> 00:04:09.000
yeah, sometimes it's time to change them, sometimes you have to kind of zoom out, and I was like,

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okay, at this age I remember things I could do, and I want to make sure my kids can do those things

00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:11.000
too, so yeah, preparing their own simple meals, and they do some of this stuff, but I am very cautious,

00:04:11.000 --> 00:04:12.000
I'm very hovering, I'm very.. don't want to go to the emergency room, yeah, yeah, and so I haven't..

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there's just a lot of things that I haven't taken on yet, like we haven't transitioned out of kids' knives, and

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I haven't let them boil water on the stove without me there, and those things are very scary to me, but

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I'm starting to realize that at some point I do have to teach my kids to do them.

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Emma

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Yeah, there's always like a bit of fear of things like that because they can get hurt, and then also, like, I

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don't know about you, but, like, I, I think it's hard to watch your kids be frustrated, yeah, like, fail a little

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bit at something, and get really frustrated with themselves. It's, it's hard to, like, let them do that, let

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them do that over and over, not in a, like, I want to take it over for them way, necessarily. I think

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sometimes that instinct I see that in other people, I totally get that. I just, more, I'm like, oh no, I know

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you're feeling really bad right now, and I don't want you to feel bad about yourself, but also you do have

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to like learn how to do things for yourself, that's very important, and it is okay to feel bad when we aren't

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good at something, that's an okay feeling, just so. Bucks, it's like kind of like having to be around for

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that is not fun, not a fun task.

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Elsie

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Yeah, I think it's like sort of like retraining yourself not to fix every problem for your child, that is like a

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new thing that I'm working on.

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Emma

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Makes sense. My next one is to take a little trip with my husband, so this summer is our anniversary.

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Her anniversary is in June, and it's our 13th anniversary. Very lucky, but our anniversary is like kind of

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sandwiched in between our boys' birthdays, and then also Father's Day, and our grandma has a

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birthday, and Nova has a birthday. It's very busy June, so we probably won't actually take a trip in June.

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It'll probably be more like July or August when we do it, and I don't know where we're gonna go. It won't

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be any crazy big deal. It's not like a Europe thing. I'm kind of thinking I would like to go somewhere

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that's like chill, and maybe we could do a little bit of hiking. I would think that was really fun, like a small

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national park type thing. I'm not really sure. We haven't planned it yet, but I really love being outside, so

00:04:37.000 --> 00:04:38.000
I think that could be something fun. We'll see.

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Elsie

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Nice, that's really sweet. Yeah, we just had our 15th anniversary, isn't that crazy?

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Emma

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Yeah, we're getting old in a good way.

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Elsie

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Definitely. Okay, so my fourth goal is to establish a proper family movie night, so our kids have finally

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gotten to the age where we can all watch a movie together that is enjoyable for everyone, and that is

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new, that's definitely new for their ages now, but we, yeah, the last year we've done like, I think, three or

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four movie nights, and it was a big success, they really liked it, so yeah, one of my favorite newsletters

00:04:47.000 --> 00:04:48.000
from Austin Cleon was Family Movie Night List, and it was like five years, and so I saved those to steal

00:04:48.000 --> 00:04:49.000
all the good ones. He had a good newsletter, he has a great news, yeah, I love his newsletter, but that

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was the best one ever, because it was like so useful, yeah, and it kind of explained like it's his is on

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Friday, it's like pizza situation, it's the same every week, and I'm not sure we can do Friday, but I think

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that was thinking maybe we could do Sunday, I don't know, we're gonna have to work on it, but it will

00:04:52.000 --> 00:04:53.000
have to be probably the same every week for us to get where we, or we could just do it, you know, like

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whatever, a couple times a month, I think, would be also good.

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Emma

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Ours is Friday, and if something is going on on Friday, we just move it to Saturday or Sunday. I don't

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know if that's helpful to you.

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Elsie

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No, that's a good idea.

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Emma

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So it's like we have a standing thing, but if they went to Grandma's house, or if you know, whatever,

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there was a kid's party, then we move it to Saturday or Sunday.

00:05:02.000 --> 00:05:03.000
Elsie

00:05:03.000 --> 00:05:04.000
I love it. I love making popcorn. We have a candy drawer, so I always have candy, and I like making

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snacks. Like, I just love the whole thing. And I love movies, and I like seeing.. we don't always watch

00:05:05.000 --> 00:05:06.000
retro movies from our childhood, but when we do, I love seeing it from the kids' eyes and their

00:05:06.000 --> 00:05:07.000
perspectives, like they absolutely loved Turner and Hooch with Tom Hanks. Yes, and they were not as

00:05:07.000 --> 00:05:08.000
impressed by Jurassic Park, and I like could not believe it. Are they scared at all? No, it's a little jumpy,

00:05:08.000 --> 00:05:09.000
not really. They were scared of the I'm doing that, the hand motion of the spitting one.

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Emma

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I don't know what it's called.

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Elsie

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They were scared of that part.

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Emma

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Yeah, that's scary part, yeah.

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Elsie

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I mean, I think the Tyrannosaurus trucks with the car.

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Emma

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Yeah, that has the most tension. And then there's a part where one jumps out of this like electrical box

00:05:19.000 --> 00:05:20.000
at Laura Duran, that's kind of scary too.

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Elsie

00:05:21.000 --> 00:05:22.000
Yeah, there's a lot, yeah, but they, they liked it, but they didn't love it, and so that was interesting to me.

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Emma

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Try again when they're in high school because I'm upset ab out this as a mahor Jurassic Park fan.

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Elsie

00:05:25.000 --> 00:05:26.000
Yeah, me too. I was Noah's age when I first watched it, so whatever. Not every experience from your

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childhood translates to your child's child. I also tried to get her to read the book Hatchet. I loved that

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book when I was a child.

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Emma

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Yeah, I just rebought it recently, because I was like, I want to read Hatchet agian. Declined it, it's kind of

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a survival. She likes, no, huh, weird. He has other ones that are, maybe I don't know. Okay, anyway.

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Elsie

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Anyway, Family Movie Night. If you have suggestions of our kids are eight and 10, give them to us. I

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love it. It's honestly like the biggest problem member of our family is Jeremy, for sure, because he has

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to be a little bit interested in the movie, so that's why we can't just watch like cartoons, and you know.

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Emma

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Have you guys already seen Sister Act and Sister Act Two yet?

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Elsie

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I have not seen them since childhood. I think that would be a great idea.

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Emma

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It has a lot of singing in it, so they might also like that, because I know they like Dancing Queen.

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Elsie

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No, the Mamma Mia's are a big hit in our world.

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Emma

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Yeah, as they should be.

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Elsie

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Okay, what's your next one?

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Emma

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This is my last one. And as I just mentioned, we have a bit of a birthday gauntlet in June. Yes, like

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everyone's birthday, apparently. Both of my kids, two little Geminis. Anyway, so my goal before that is to

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clean out the kids' toys and also books before their birthdays, because they both get lots of new toys,

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stuffies, books, and so I like to kind of clean them out and make you know take the nice stuff to thrifts

00:05:52.000 --> 00:05:53.000
and just make sure that everything in their rooms is stuff that they still play with and still read and a lot

00:05:53.000 --> 00:05:54.000
of times Oscar's books will get moved to Hugo's room because he's like transit kind of transitioning out

00:05:54.000 --> 00:05:55.000
of board books and so a lot of them end up in Hugo's room but a lot of times I take stuff to thrifts

00:05:55.000 --> 00:05:56.000
whatever I also feel like it keeps the room very manageable for like cleaning it up and cleaning it up

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with them is because it doesn't have tons and tons and tons of stuff in it. It's like if you're not enjoying

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this, we're going to take it to the thrifts. I'm so glad to do that before the birthdays. I like to do it before

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the birthdays and before Christmas. It's just kind of my own little mental way to like stay on top of it, and

00:05:59.000 --> 00:06:00.000
it's also little hack because they're about to get a bunch of new stuff, so then they won't notice that I've

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gotten rid of some of their old stuff, because they're focused on the new things, so there you go.

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Elsie

00:06:02.000 --> 00:06:03.000
Love it. Okay, my final one is to first draft a new novel, so I have kind of been starting on two, which is a

00:06:03.000 --> 00:06:04.000
problem, so I have two going, so I do need to pick, and then I just want to finish a first draft, because

00:06:04.000 --> 00:06:05.000
everyone's different. So, Emma loves a first draft, like that is like her, that's like her favorite part. Would

00:06:05.000 --> 00:06:06.000
you say, is that fair to say your favorite part?

00:06:06.000 --> 00:06:07.000
Emma

00:06:07.000 --> 00:06:08.000
Editing's grown on me. Okay, but I like, I like a wander through the forest writing experiment, you're like,

00:06:08.000 --> 00:06:09.000
I don't know where this is going. I do have outlines, but yeah, yeah, I like a first draft.

00:06:09.000 --> 00:06:10.000
Elsie

00:06:10.000 --> 00:06:11.000
I do not really love the first draft as much. I'm kind of dreading it, so I thought it would be a good

00:06:11.000 --> 00:06:12.000
summer activity, because if I do it very scheduled, then I can give myself the gift when my children are

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back in school in September of having like being ready to enter an editing phase, which to me is much

00:06:13.000 --> 00:06:14.000
more the phase that I enjoy. My friend always says shoveling sand, if you heard that one, shoveling

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sand into a sandbox, so that later on we can make sand castles. I think it's a nice quote, and that is like,

00:06:15.000 --> 00:06:16.000
I think that's a good way to look at the first draft, like you do have to get the material there at some

00:06:16.000 --> 00:06:17.000
point. You have to do it, and it's hard for me to read back my first draft, because I like, just don't like, I

00:06:17.000 --> 00:06:18.000
just don't like reading a bad book. Yeah, yeah, like, you have to admit your own, you have to look at

00:06:18.000 --> 00:06:19.000
your own flaws, like in the mirror, but it is fun, and I mean it's definitely exciting.

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Emma

00:06:20.000 --> 00:06:21.000
Sometimes I think of it, though, as like a little bit of like I'm just gonna roast myself here, you know? And

00:06:21.000 --> 00:06:22.000
that makes it a little more fun, like you're like, "Oh, you thought you were so clever with that little

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metaphor, didn't you? Cut.

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Elsie

00:06:24.000 --> 00:06:25.000
Totally, I've never had that happen. Yeah, so yeah, I'm excited for the season, though. I'm excited for

00:06:25.000 --> 00:06:26.000
summer. I do, it's grown on me to be like one of my favorite parts of the year, and then obviously it

00:06:26.000 --> 00:06:27.000
comes before fall, which is our favorite, favorite, favorite part of the year. So, oh yeah, to be all down hill

00:06:27.000 --> 00:06:28.000
from here. It's all good now. Yep. Okay, so let's discuss Heather's hot take, which is shoe-free homes

00:06:28.000 --> 00:06:29.000
are annoying and unnecessary. I want to wear my cute shoes to your gathering, not my socks.

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Emma

00:06:30.000 --> 00:06:31.000
Okay, so I got to say, I don't know if anyone else is a comedy you like to watch stand-up comedy. I love

00:06:31.000 --> 00:06:32.000
to watch stand-up comedy. We watch so many of the specials, and I feel like they're doing so many

00:06:32.000 --> 00:06:33.000
more specials now than they used to, which is so nice, because I just love it. Anyway, the new Pete

00:06:33.000 --> 00:06:34.000
Holmes special, which I think is called Silly Silly Fun Boy, or it's something like that, has a whole bit,

00:06:34.000 --> 00:06:35.000
and I think it's in the opener about this exactly, about shoe free homes, and it's very funny, so look that

00:06:35.000 --> 00:06:36.000
up. I recommend the whole special. I thought it was great. You can just look up this clip if you want. If

00:06:36.000 --> 00:06:37.000
you're not a real standup watcher, definitely look that up, because I feel like he says a lot of things that I

00:06:37.000 --> 00:06:38.000
feel, but he says it funny, so that's cute. Anyway, here's what's happening in my world. So, my kids and

00:06:38.000 --> 00:06:39.000
my husband leave their shoes all over the house, and their socks, and it drives me nuts. And so,

00:06:39.000 --> 00:06:40.000
recently I got this like shoe rack, coat rack situation, and so now that's like the spot, because it was also

00:06:40.000 --> 00:06:41.000
kind of a problem, like my older one would take his shoes off, and then the next morning we know

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where they were, we have to find them before school, and it's like, Where are your shoes? How many

00:06:42.000 --> 00:06:43.000
days do I have to start my day with, Where are your shoes, and the infinite search for the shoes, and so

00:06:43.000 --> 00:06:44.000
it's like, this is the spot we put our shoes there, and even if it's mostly me putting the shoes there, at

00:06:44.000 --> 00:06:45.000
least now we have a spot that's right by the door. Where the shoes are, so anyway, what happens

00:06:45.000 --> 00:06:46.000
though, is I've noticed since getting that it's right by our kind of by our front door, it's it's really right by

00:06:46.000 --> 00:06:47.000
our door where we come in, which is from the garage, but you can see it from the front door. So now

00:06:47.000 --> 00:06:48.000
I've noticed since having that everyone who comes over, I think they kind of clock it and they start

00:06:48.000 --> 00:06:49.000
taking off their shoes immediately when they come in my house, and we're actually not a shoe-free

00:06:49.000 --> 00:06:50.000
house. Like, I actually don't give at all. We have a dog, I don't give a.. if you take your shoes off at my

00:06:50.000 --> 00:06:51.000
house, but I've just noticed since getting this shoe rack that's really for my kids and my husband, and

00:06:51.000 --> 00:06:52.000
my shoes are there too. For the record, everyone takes their shoes off when they come into my house. I

00:06:52.000 --> 00:06:53.000
have my instinct where I'm like, you don't have to, but I've kind of stopped doing it, where I'm like, you

00:06:53.000 --> 00:06:54.000
know, what they can do, whatever they want, if they're gonna leave their shoes on, I'm not gonna say

00:06:54.000 --> 00:06:55.000
anything, so I don't care. So I'm just gonna let people do what they want to do, because a lot of times

00:06:55.000 --> 00:06:56.000
people are like half taking their shoes off, and I'm like, oh, you don't have to, and I feel like they're like

00:06:56.000 --> 00:06:57.000
looking at the shoe rack, and they're like, no, it's, you know, like it's this weird moment, so I'm like, you

00:06:57.000 --> 00:06:58.000
know, I'm not gonna say anything, I'm just gonna let people do whatever they do when they walk in the

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house, because I don't care.

00:06:59.000 --> 00:07:00.000
Elsie

00:07:00.000 --> 00:07:01.000
That's good. Okay, I have to say a split opinion on this. So, I think I agree. I think it's bad to make

00:07:01.000 --> 00:07:02.000
people feel uncomfortable. I think that it's okay to let, like, if people come into my house and they ask

00:07:02.000 --> 00:07:03.000
me, "Do I take my shoes off? I say no, and I let them keep them on, but I do feel like it's like something

00:07:03.000 --> 00:07:04.000
that maybe you might want to swift for later. I don't know, so I just am not comfortable making every..

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actually, I do that with the kids when we have just play date. I have the kids do it, because one time

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something just terrible happened.

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Emma

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Was it a dog situation?

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Elsie

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It was like mud at the playground, and it just got everywhere. It was just everywhere, everywhere, and it

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was on all their shoes, and there was like five of them. The kids put their shoes in back, and so,

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anyway, so I, and I know that, like, I have met people who I love very much who are uncomfortable with

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taking their shoes off and don't want to do it, and I respect that. It's fine, but in my opinion, in my

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personal opinion, it's just my family. I do want us to all take our shoes off when we come in and put

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them in a certain place. We have a closet for it. Part of it is the organization of keeping your kids' shoes.

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Part of it is our dogs still shoe shoes, so they really need to be in the closet instead of just on the floor,

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and then another part of it is I think it makes sure carpets and rugs last longer if people don't wear

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shoes in the house, and that is more of an everyday, like your family, it's not as much like when you

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have a party, I feel like you can vacuum and swifter after a party and it's fine, but just for everyday life I

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think that it makes your house a lot cleaner if you don't wear shoes indoors, and just because, like, you

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look, there are, I mean, you look it up, look it up for yourself if you care, your shoes do get nasty, and

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they're, and it is tracking germs around your house more than you think.

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Emma

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Yeah, but my sort of thing with it is I'm like, I have a dog, though, and he goes in and out all day long,

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and like, that's true, he's made if anyone's making our floors disgusting from outdoor germs, it's more

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than likely him, and it's not his fault, you know, but also it is his fault, technically, but, like, you know,

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he's not meaning to, I guess, is what I mean.

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Elsie

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That's true, we have dogs too, and I'm not saying that they're that people are worse, the dogs are

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definitely worse. Yeah,

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Emma

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I accept the germs to have an indoor dog. I, you know, that's just sort of the trade off, I guess. And so

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I'm like, well, I've already accepted this. I will say, though, I feel like, so for me, when I go to someone's

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house, I personally don't care if they want me to take my shoes off or not. I'm like, whatever, either way,

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I don't care, but if I've come for like a more fancy, like, we will host, we've both have hosted before, like

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the New Year's Eve party for our friend group, I'm kind of like, leave your shoes on, because it goes

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with the outfit, and we're telling like a fancy time, but if I've had people over and subject just a few

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people, and we're watching a movie, or I don't know, the Super Bowl, or something, and if we're all

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sitting on the couch under blankets eating snacks, I'm like, you probably want your shoes off, so feel

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free to do that. So I almost feel like it's good to kind of like give an indication that whatever you'd like to

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do is cool.

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Elsie

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Read the room, yeah, read through. It's fine either way. We're basically both sidesing it too hard, so we

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should probably call this quits.

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Emma

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I'm on side, leave your shoes on. I just don't care if people take their shoes off, and I can see a world

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where it matters. Okay, but honestly, if I go to someone's house and they make me take my shoes off, I

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don't really care. But if I see a dog walking around, I am kind of like, come on.

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Elsie

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Well, the worst possible thing that can happen is if you didn't notice that everyone else took their shoes

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off. This happened to me recently. I didn't notice everyone else took their shoes off. They were all sitting

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by the door. There was a sign there that said you should do it, and I didn't. And then I was like sitting at

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the dining room table, and I was like, what do I do.

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Emma

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You just didn't see the sign.

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Elsie

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No, I don't know if I was like one of the first people in or what happened, but I did not get the memo,

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and it was not clear to me.

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Emma

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What did you do?

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Elsie

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I just hoped that she wouldn't be mad.

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Emma

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You just kept them on?

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Elsie

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Well, I was already sitting there by the time.

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Emma

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I just would have been like, oh, I like to act like a moron. That's always my way to be like my bad, you

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know.

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Elsie

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Whoopsie. Anyway, it is an awkward topic. I love it.

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Emma

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And now it's time for a joke, or a fact, or a meditation with Nova.

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Elsie

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Hey, Nova, what do you have for us this week?

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Nova

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A joke.

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Elsie

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Okay, we're ready.

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Nova

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What kind of tree can fit in your hand?

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Elsie

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What kind?

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Nova

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A palm tree.

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Elsie

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Oh, that's a good one.

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Nova

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Oh, and happy summer. I'm saying this because my school's getting out this week.

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Elsie

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Yes, happy summer.

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Nova

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Bye.

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Elsie

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Thank you so much for listening. If you have a topic request for a future episode, email us at

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podcast@abeautifulmess.com We also just love to hear from you, so write us any day, anytime,

00:08:36.000 --> 00:08:37.000
anywhere. It's our favorite email of the week to receive.