#11 Christina

Hello, Hey, do you have a copy of TV Guide? 0:00:12.320 --> 0:00:13.480 No? 0:00:13.480 --> 0:00:16.840 No, why I can't find my copy? And I was 0:00:16.840 --> 0:00:25.080 wondering what was on TV? Don't don't you remember? 0:00:25.239 --> 0:00:27.400 Don't you remember? Don't you don't? 0:00:27.400 --> 0:00:27.560 Wait? 0:00:27.560 --> 0:00:29.840 Wait, don't you remember calling people up on the phone. 0:00:30.360 --> 0:00:31.920 I do remember that, Yeah. 0:00:31.680 --> 0:00:34.200 Just just to see what was on. I remember calling 0:00:34.200 --> 0:00:36.280 on my aunt Tilly because I was too I was 0:00:36.320 --> 0:00:38.480 too lazy to get up off the couch to look 0:00:38.520 --> 0:00:40.199 for the TV Guide, so I just called her up. 0:00:41.560 --> 0:00:44.600 Who woman could hardly walk and she had to search 0:00:44.600 --> 0:00:53.960 around for a TV guide to go. I'm GIMILTT Media. 0:00:54.160 --> 0:01:03.240 I'm Jonathan Goldstein, and this is Heavyweight today's episode, Christina. 0:01:11.680 --> 0:01:15.000 This is the best of all possible worlds. My father 0:01:15.160 --> 0:01:19.639 was fond of saying. The words were spoken contentedly, often 0:01:19.680 --> 0:01:23.360 while reclining in a barca lounger belt buckle undone after 0:01:23.400 --> 0:01:26.800 a large meal of baked beans and lamb chops. But 0:01:26.880 --> 0:01:29.839 what did my father know of other worlds? He'd held 0:01:29.880 --> 0:01:32.320 down the same job and was married to the same 0:01:32.400 --> 0:01:37.840 woman for decades plus. He hardly left the house. But 0:01:37.920 --> 0:01:40.680 what he did know was that this world had one 0:01:40.760 --> 0:01:45.440 thing over all of those other worlds. It existed for 0:01:45.600 --> 0:01:53.360 my father. That was enough to make it best. I, 0:01:53.480 --> 0:01:56.080 on the other hand, am not one over so easily. 0:01:56.840 --> 0:01:57.080 Sure. 0:01:57.160 --> 0:02:01.560 Existence is a nice quality, a fine quality, but going 0:02:01.600 --> 0:02:03.960 so far as to call a world that contains both 0:02:04.080 --> 0:02:08.200 soul patches and puddles the best possible anything seems a 0:02:08.200 --> 0:02:13.639 little extreme, and so imagining other worlds the same, only 0:02:13.680 --> 0:02:17.720 better is just too irresistible. In spite of the pain 0:02:17.840 --> 0:02:24.480 such thinking inevitably invites. Why don't we start from the beginning. Okay, 0:02:24.960 --> 0:02:28.000 this is Christina, and like me, she knows this world 0:02:28.040 --> 0:02:31.680 can use a few tweaks. Overall, she says her life 0:02:31.680 --> 0:02:34.160 hasn't been a bad one, It's just not the one 0:02:34.200 --> 0:02:37.600 she was meant to live. She's worked as a waitress, 0:02:37.639 --> 0:02:40.760 a receptionist, as a home care worker, the kinds of 0:02:40.840 --> 0:02:45.440 jobs you do, but not necessarily the kind you dream about. Lately, 0:02:45.680 --> 0:02:47.800 she's been helping run her husband's company. 0:02:48.360 --> 0:02:50.520 It's a disc golfing backpack company. 0:02:51.360 --> 0:02:54.480 Say sorry, say that again. It's a what disc golf 0:02:54.760 --> 0:02:57.280 backpack is? What is disc golf? 0:02:57.720 --> 0:03:00.880 It's like ball golf, but instead of balls and clubs, 0:03:00.919 --> 0:03:01.720 you have frisbees. 0:03:01.960 --> 0:03:04.480 Oh, when you say ball golf, you're talking about golf. 0:03:04.200 --> 0:03:05.359 Golf like a regular golf. 0:03:05.440 --> 0:03:09.119 Yeah, okay, I've never heard it referred to distinguished as 0:03:09.200 --> 0:03:10.000 ball golf, but I. 0:03:10.080 --> 0:03:12.440 Well, only disc golfers call it ball golf. 0:03:12.760 --> 0:03:14.640 So, but how do you how do you get a 0:03:14.639 --> 0:03:15.680 frisbee in a golf hole? 0:03:16.400 --> 0:03:19.040 No, it's actually not a hole, it's a basket. 0:03:19.400 --> 0:03:24.000 Oh my goodness. Before she started pining after better worlds, 0:03:24.360 --> 0:03:27.640 Christina was focused on just one, the world of small 0:03:27.680 --> 0:03:28.840 town western Canada. 0:03:29.320 --> 0:03:31.880 I lived with my mom. She was a single mom. 0:03:31.919 --> 0:03:35.080 My dad left when I was around one, and my 0:03:35.200 --> 0:03:37.440 mom was diagnosed with schizophrenia. 0:03:38.200 --> 0:03:40.600 Christina was just a kid, so a lot of it's 0:03:40.600 --> 0:03:44.080 now fuzzy, but she remembers bits of things, her mom 0:03:44.160 --> 0:03:46.960 going off her meds and beginning to hear voices, her 0:03:46.960 --> 0:03:48.920 mom waking her in the middle of the night and 0:03:48.960 --> 0:03:52.240 saying they had to leave right away. She remembers running 0:03:52.240 --> 0:03:53.720 with her mom down dark streets. 0:03:54.800 --> 0:03:58.880 She started becoming violent and she would just you know, 0:03:59.000 --> 0:04:02.160 hit me with the phone handle, or this one time 0:04:02.200 --> 0:04:06.080 she came after me with a high heeled shoe. There's 0:04:06.080 --> 0:04:09.440 no food in the house. She wouldn't do laundry, like 0:04:09.640 --> 0:04:11.960 the dirty clothes would pile up in the living room, like, 0:04:12.040 --> 0:04:16.640 I remember this massive mound of dirty clothes, and I 0:04:16.640 --> 0:04:19.640 remember this kid made fun of me for having dirty pants, 0:04:19.839 --> 0:04:22.760 and so I started stealing clothes just so I could 0:04:22.839 --> 0:04:24.480 have clean clothes to go to school. 0:04:25.600 --> 0:04:27.960 When you were a kid trying to survive on your own, 0:04:28.279 --> 0:04:31.920 the unthinkable can start to seem normal. To escape her house, 0:04:32.279 --> 0:04:35.040 Christina took a job caring for two boys not much 0:04:35.080 --> 0:04:39.040 younger than herself. She became a twelve year old live 0:04:39.080 --> 0:04:39.680 in nanny. 0:04:40.200 --> 0:04:42.159 So I ended up moving in with this family and 0:04:42.200 --> 0:04:45.920 looking after the boys. They paid me a little bit, 0:04:46.960 --> 0:04:50.320 and I quit school to be a nanny. 0:04:51.120 --> 0:04:54.520 When she stopped showing up at school, social services removed 0:04:54.600 --> 0:04:57.720 Christina from the nannying house, but instead of bringing her 0:04:57.760 --> 0:04:59.880 back to her mom, they took her to a fi 0:05:00.120 --> 0:05:06.640 her home. She was sent to live with an older 0:05:06.640 --> 0:05:09.840 couple and their grandson. They lived on the fancier side 0:05:09.839 --> 0:05:13.839 of town in a house decorated with candleholders and decorative pistols. 0:05:14.600 --> 0:05:18.640 The foster mother was a woman named Isabelle. Her grandson, David, 0:05:19.000 --> 0:05:22.320 was the golden boy who could do no wrong. From 0:05:22.360 --> 0:05:25.320 day one, Christina struggled for Isabelle's approval. 0:05:26.080 --> 0:05:28.920 My foster mother and I kind of butted heads a 0:05:28.960 --> 0:05:31.119 little bit or a lot. 0:05:32.839 --> 0:05:36.159 Although Isabelle was only an inch taller, Christina was scared 0:05:36.200 --> 0:05:40.680 of her. Her foster mother communicated through rules and punishments. 0:05:41.000 --> 0:05:45.440 She was very strict. I was five minutes late for curfew. 0:05:45.560 --> 0:05:47.880 I would be grounded for a month. It felt like 0:05:47.920 --> 0:05:52.800 I was always grounded and afraid all the time, and 0:05:53.200 --> 0:05:58.159 kind of walking on eggshells, and yeah, just feeling always 0:05:58.200 --> 0:06:02.920 really intimidated and scared. I was always scared. 0:06:03.320 --> 0:06:06.920 And when she got scared, Christina would go silent. As 0:06:06.960 --> 0:06:18.600 a result, she never once stood up to Isabelle. It 0:06:18.640 --> 0:06:21.479 was while living in Isabelle's world that another better world 0:06:21.520 --> 0:06:24.840 presented itself to Christina, a world with rules that were 0:06:24.839 --> 0:06:28.159 easy to understand, a world where someone was always keeping 0:06:28.200 --> 0:06:32.040 score and keeping things fair. This was the eighty four 0:06:32.160 --> 0:06:34.719 x fifty foot world of a basketball court. 0:06:35.240 --> 0:06:38.880 I can't explain how much I was obsessed with basketball. 0:06:39.080 --> 0:06:41.960 I would practice at like six in the morning at 0:06:41.960 --> 0:06:45.760 the school. I would practice on weekends. I'd watch the 0:06:45.880 --> 0:06:49.400 NBA games with Clyde the Glide and Charles Barkley, and 0:06:49.440 --> 0:06:51.160 then my name was in the paper a few times. 0:06:51.240 --> 0:06:54.719 I think I have some paper clippings of like high scoring. 0:06:55.279 --> 0:06:57.600 I loved, loved, loved basketball. 0:06:58.440 --> 0:07:01.599 On the basketball court and it was never scared. It 0:07:01.680 --> 0:07:03.800 was a place where, for the first time in her life, 0:07:03.920 --> 0:07:07.880 she felt in control and confident. Her foster brother, David, 0:07:08.120 --> 0:07:11.720 a popular jock, spent hours helping her get better. She 0:07:11.840 --> 0:07:15.240 joined a team and quickly became a high scorer. Eventually 0:07:15.320 --> 0:07:16.560 she was made team captain. 0:07:16.720 --> 0:07:18.920 They would always put me inside, like I would always 0:07:18.920 --> 0:07:19.840 have to guard the post. 0:07:20.280 --> 0:07:23.480 When Christina talks about basketball, she lights up, and I 0:07:23.520 --> 0:07:26.360 want to encourage her to keep talking by asking questions. 0:07:26.960 --> 0:07:29.680 But my only real knowledge of basketball comes from watching 0:07:29.720 --> 0:07:32.760 the Harlem Globetrotters. I was in my thirties before I 0:07:32.840 --> 0:07:35.320 learned it was illegal to bring stilts onto the court, 0:07:35.880 --> 0:07:37.280 so my questions are limited. 0:07:37.560 --> 0:07:42.080 We tall no only five to six. But I guess 0:07:42.360 --> 0:07:47.920 I kind of had this unrealistic view of myself where 0:07:47.920 --> 0:07:52.520 I thought I was taller than I was because off court, 0:07:52.560 --> 0:07:56.320 I was like kind of meek, and I'd just follow 0:07:56.360 --> 0:07:59.000 the crowd and I wouldn't create any waves. I didn't 0:07:59.000 --> 0:08:01.840 really have an opinion, but on the court, I was 0:08:02.160 --> 0:08:03.800 a force to be reckoned with. It was like the 0:08:03.840 --> 0:08:05.520 only time where I felt powerful. 0:08:11.560 --> 0:08:13.720 It was around this time that a plan began to 0:08:13.760 --> 0:08:17.680 take shape. If she kept practicing and kept winning, she'd 0:08:17.680 --> 0:08:21.520 get a basketball scholarship. Christina knew that was her only 0:08:21.640 --> 0:08:23.240 hope of getting into college. 0:08:23.800 --> 0:08:28.000 I wanted to get out of that circle of welfare 0:08:28.160 --> 0:08:33.640 and illness and living from paycheck to paycheck and just 0:08:33.679 --> 0:08:34.839 feeling just being poor. 0:08:35.760 --> 0:08:39.600 It sucked, which brings us to the moment that thirty 0:08:39.679 --> 0:08:43.520 years later, Christina still can't stop thinking about. She'd just 0:08:43.600 --> 0:08:46.679 come home from school when Isabelle called her into the kitchen, 0:08:46.960 --> 0:08:49.600 sat her down at the table, and presented her with 0:08:49.640 --> 0:08:50.400 an ultimatum. 0:08:51.080 --> 0:08:53.679 She said, you have to get your grades up. You 0:08:53.720 --> 0:08:57.800 have to work harder at school, and so in order 0:08:57.800 --> 0:09:00.440 for me to be able to play basketball following year, 0:09:00.440 --> 0:09:03.080 which would have been eleventh grade, I had to have 0:09:03.160 --> 0:09:06.600 an average of a bee in every class. But I 0:09:06.640 --> 0:09:13.360 was really bad at math and chemistry, and I didn't 0:09:13.360 --> 0:09:17.160 make it. I wasn't allowed to play basketball. 0:09:19.280 --> 0:09:21.920 What she remembers most about that time was watching a 0:09:21.920 --> 0:09:26.240 lot of TV and overeating and the chores. After forcing 0:09:26.280 --> 0:09:29.800 Christina to quit the basketball team, Isabelle handed her chores 0:09:29.800 --> 0:09:32.920 that felt like ironic punishments from the Judy Bloom version 0:09:32.920 --> 0:09:36.640 of Dante's Inferno. She had to bake cookies for the family, 0:09:37.040 --> 0:09:39.560 but because of her weight gain, she wasn't allowed to 0:09:39.600 --> 0:09:43.560 eat any, and when she dusted the house, Isabelle instructed 0:09:43.559 --> 0:09:47.280 her to pick up David's basketball trophies, dust each one, 0:09:47.679 --> 0:09:51.920 and dust the shelf underneath. All the while, Christina felt 0:09:51.920 --> 0:09:56.480 her loss acutely of basketball and the better world had promised. 0:09:57.160 --> 0:10:01.480 She took something from me that I that I've not 0:10:01.760 --> 0:10:02.920 been able to get back. 0:10:04.760 --> 0:10:05.440 What is that thing? 0:10:05.880 --> 0:10:07.360 Yeah, and I don't even know. I don't. I don't. 0:10:07.559 --> 0:10:11.160 When I say that out loud, it sounds ridiculous, but 0:10:11.600 --> 0:10:17.480 it feels like that passion for something it dashed this 0:10:17.600 --> 0:10:18.959 huge dream that I had. 0:10:18.760 --> 0:10:30.200 For my life. Christina still wonders why why did Isabelle 0:10:30.240 --> 0:10:33.160 take away basketball, the only thing that really mattered to her, 0:10:33.400 --> 0:10:35.920 that would have given her a better life, But all 0:10:35.960 --> 0:10:38.160 these years she's been too afraid to ask. 0:10:39.160 --> 0:10:43.240 She's going to be ninety five in July. The thought 0:10:43.400 --> 0:10:46.920 of talking to her about it petrifies me a little bit, 0:10:46.960 --> 0:10:49.760 like there's still a part of me that is scared 0:10:49.800 --> 0:10:56.280 of her, which is ridiculous. And what do you want, 0:10:57.040 --> 0:11:00.240 I think, yeah, I think I want to know, like 0:11:00.360 --> 0:11:02.840 why she made my life so difficult, if it was 0:11:03.480 --> 0:11:08.120 just to break me down, if she had some kind 0:11:08.160 --> 0:11:10.000 of thing against. 0:11:09.600 --> 0:11:12.000 Me, And what do you want to hear her say? 0:11:16.480 --> 0:11:18.319 I guess I want to just hear her say that 0:11:19.120 --> 0:11:23.760 she just genuinely wanted me to have better grades. But 0:11:23.840 --> 0:11:29.280 I know that that's just such bs. For whatever reason, 0:11:29.320 --> 0:11:31.880 I've let go of a lot of things that have happened, 0:11:31.880 --> 0:11:35.839 but for whatever reason, this one thing, the basketball thing, 0:11:35.880 --> 0:11:38.520 not letting me play basketball. I'm having such a hard 0:11:38.520 --> 0:11:42.200 time letting go of that and forgiving her. I want 0:11:42.200 --> 0:11:42.679 to let it go. 0:11:43.480 --> 0:11:45.319 So you want to go talk to her? 0:11:45.800 --> 0:11:46.319 Yeah? 0:11:46.840 --> 0:11:50.640 You, and you want me to come? Yes, I get 0:11:50.760 --> 0:11:53.240 really mealy mouthed when I'm in the same room as 0:11:53.280 --> 0:11:56.319 like strong willed, scary older women. I'll tell you that 0:11:56.440 --> 0:11:57.680 right now, I'm not going to be much help. 0:12:00.600 --> 0:12:02.480 So we're doing it. 0:12:02.480 --> 0:12:06.080 It sounds like we're doing it all right. We're gonna 0:12:06.120 --> 0:12:13.280 go talk to that scary lady after the break. How 0:12:13.360 --> 0:12:15.839 much mincing can a Meilie mouth mince? When a Melie 0:12:15.880 --> 0:12:20.439 mouth meets a menacing miss who writes this stuff? I 0:12:20.480 --> 0:12:28.520 guess I do once I gave Christina my word that 0:12:28.559 --> 0:12:32.479 i'd help, I approached CEO and Gimblet founder Alex Bloomberg 0:12:32.559 --> 0:12:34.240 to ask if he could fly me to the British 0:12:34.280 --> 0:12:37.520 Columbian interior to confront a ninety five year old woman 0:12:37.559 --> 0:12:40.040 about something she may or may not have said some 0:12:40.120 --> 0:12:43.120 thirty years ago, to which Alex asked, why are you 0:12:43.160 --> 0:12:45.720 always standing just outside the door whenever I get out 0:12:45.760 --> 0:12:48.520 of the bathroom? And I said it was a coincidence, 0:12:48.880 --> 0:12:52.319 although I might have pronounced it Quinki dink to be playful. 0:12:52.640 --> 0:12:54.680 And he asked how long this trip would take me 0:12:54.720 --> 0:12:57.080 out of the office, and I said a week, and 0:12:57.120 --> 0:12:59.720 he said to take longer if I needed it. So 0:12:59.800 --> 0:13:02.640 I was off to Canada. 0:13:05.360 --> 0:13:22.920 Tail de nos ai, are you to? 0:13:23.320 --> 0:13:26.040 I meet Christina and her husband Levi at the Colonna 0:13:26.080 --> 0:13:29.559 Airport in British Columbia. They'd just flown in from Portland, 0:13:29.880 --> 0:13:32.640 and the look of trust on their faces is daunting. 0:13:33.480 --> 0:13:36.520 When meeting new people, especially people I'm about to help. 0:13:36.840 --> 0:13:41.160 I'm more comfortable with looks of skepticism or anticipatory disappointment. 0:13:41.840 --> 0:13:47.240 Trust was disconcerting, Yes I have. It was an hour 0:13:47.240 --> 0:13:49.560 and a half drive to Isabelle's. So we made our 0:13:49.600 --> 0:13:52.480 way to the airport rental desk to get a car 0:13:53.520 --> 0:13:54.440 Goldstein G. 0:13:54.600 --> 0:13:55.079 O L D. 0:13:55.679 --> 0:13:57.120 And I just asked what that is there? 0:13:57.240 --> 0:13:59.120 Oh, it's just a we're doing a radio story. 0:13:59.240 --> 0:14:01.240 So I've just do you mind turning that off and 0:14:01.320 --> 0:14:01.920 put away? 0:14:02.040 --> 0:14:06.000 Yeah? If I couldn't even stand up to the car 0:14:06.040 --> 0:14:09.120 rental clerk, what hope did I have of helping Christina 0:14:09.240 --> 0:14:12.719 stand up to Isabelle. 0:14:15.520 --> 0:14:18.280 It's hot in here, I want to. 0:14:18.280 --> 0:14:23.160 Say, it's been well over two years since Christina's seen Isabelle. 0:14:23.600 --> 0:14:26.800 She's feeling anxious, so I try to keep the mood positive. 0:14:30.120 --> 0:14:32.320 I bet the thrift stores are really good around here. 0:14:34.640 --> 0:14:37.720 I point out foreign license plates, and because we're in 0:14:37.760 --> 0:14:43.800 a foreign country, there are many pretty Have you guys 0:14:43.800 --> 0:14:48.840 been watching this show called Little Big Lies or big 0:14:48.880 --> 0:14:58.400 little Lies or little big Lies? Well set, I think so. 0:15:02.440 --> 0:15:05.400 Isabelle lives on the ground floor of a squat apartment 0:15:05.440 --> 0:15:14.520 block mostly inhabited by seniors. We wait. When no one answers, 0:15:14.760 --> 0:15:24.600 we ring the bell. The door opens. I heard you 0:15:24.640 --> 0:15:30.120 the first time, Isabelle says. Christina smiles in spite of herself. 0:15:30.320 --> 0:15:32.320 She can't help but get a kick out of Isabelle. 0:15:33.720 --> 0:15:37.320 Isabelle peers up at us from behind her walker, Christina's husband, 0:15:37.400 --> 0:15:41.880 Levi makes introductions, isabel Hi, how are you doing? 0:15:42.360 --> 0:15:42.920 Oh? 0:15:43.560 --> 0:15:43.640 That? 0:15:43.840 --> 0:15:48.560 Oh? Is me reacting to Isabelle's handshake, a surprisingly powerful 0:15:48.600 --> 0:15:52.160 thing that yanks me through the doorframe. Although a diminutive 0:15:52.160 --> 0:15:56.240 woman with white, puffy hair and wirerim glasses, Isabelle's just 0:15:56.360 --> 0:16:00.600 established herself as the alpha. Nice to meet you, Nice. 0:16:00.360 --> 0:16:00.680 To meet you. 0:16:02.280 --> 0:16:06.800 Okay, you seem to be doing great. 0:16:08.000 --> 0:16:10.680 I'm doing not bad for my age, I guess. 0:16:12.120 --> 0:16:15.840 Isabelle's apartment is tidy and dim, decorated with candles that 0:16:15.920 --> 0:16:19.040 haven't been lit in years. We slowly follow her down 0:16:19.080 --> 0:16:21.840 a narrow hallway to her living room, where she seats 0:16:21.840 --> 0:16:26.520 herself in a faded blue mechanized armchair. On the drive over, 0:16:26.960 --> 0:16:31.200 Christina mentioned that Isabelle is legally blind, but I misremember 0:16:31.240 --> 0:16:34.920 this as Isabelle being legally deaf, so I compliment her 0:16:35.080 --> 0:16:38.240 on how well she's following along. Well, I'm not talking 0:16:38.360 --> 0:16:41.080 very loud, and you you've been able to hear everything. 0:16:41.520 --> 0:16:45.520 So I did say there's nothing wrong with my ears right. 0:16:46.680 --> 0:16:47.200 And you did. 0:16:47.200 --> 0:16:47.240 Not. 0:16:51.280 --> 0:16:54.240 To recover from this faux pas, I offer Isabelle a 0:16:54.360 --> 0:16:57.480 chance to feel my face run her hands through my beard, 0:16:57.840 --> 0:17:00.400 which is something I think I saw done in the mirror. 0:17:00.960 --> 0:17:03.240 If ever, you want to feel my stubble, or I. 0:17:03.200 --> 0:17:05.879 Don't go running around feeling beards. 0:17:06.000 --> 0:17:08.320 I decide that now's as good a time as any 0:17:08.440 --> 0:17:11.760 to offer around the airport treats I bought during my layover. 0:17:12.080 --> 0:17:15.400 I brought some refreshments. Since I don't want to put 0:17:15.440 --> 0:17:18.640 Isabelle out by asking for a party tray, I scooted 0:17:18.640 --> 0:17:20.840 my travel socks and underwear to the side of my 0:17:20.960 --> 0:17:26.440 backpack and proffer them straight from the bag, some chocolate 0:17:26.440 --> 0:17:27.919 covered nuts and such. 0:17:28.320 --> 0:17:29.679 Not right now, thank you? 0:17:29.720 --> 0:17:38.640 No, okay, I'll leave them in the bag. If I've 0:17:38.720 --> 0:17:41.360 learned anything from my work in the business of forcing 0:17:41.400 --> 0:17:44.840 people to ask terrifying questions, it was that it's always 0:17:44.880 --> 0:17:48.040 best to just get it over with. Ask the question 0:17:48.480 --> 0:17:51.639 why did you ruin my life? Get the answer, and 0:17:51.720 --> 0:17:54.760 head back to the hotel bar to eat the juiciest, 0:17:54.880 --> 0:17:58.399 fattiest tea bone steak that Gimlet Media's fourteen dollars per 0:17:58.520 --> 0:18:02.760 dim allows. But staging is everything I need to be 0:18:02.840 --> 0:18:07.080 off hand subtle. Do you Christina, do you have anything 0:18:07.119 --> 0:18:25.280 that you you want to ask about, or Christina looks 0:18:25.320 --> 0:18:28.560 down at her hands and tightens her lips. Of course 0:18:28.600 --> 0:18:32.840 I understand her hesitation. Isabelle is even more intimidating in 0:18:32.840 --> 0:18:36.400 person than Christina made her out, and nothing about being 0:18:36.440 --> 0:18:39.919 here can possibly feel much like coming home. The walls 0:18:39.920 --> 0:18:43.760 and shelves are loaded with photos of Isabelle's children, grandchildren, 0:18:43.960 --> 0:18:47.680 and great grandchildren, but there isn't a single photo anywhere 0:18:47.920 --> 0:18:52.760 of her only foster child, Christina. To break the silence, 0:18:53.000 --> 0:18:56.080 I ask Isabelle why she originally took Christina into her 0:18:56.119 --> 0:18:57.399 home in the first place. 0:18:57.760 --> 0:18:59.639 And one of my children left a child for me 0:18:59.720 --> 0:19:04.800 to raise my grandson. Yeah, so I thought life was 0:19:04.960 --> 0:19:08.240 just my husband and I. We were both older. It 0:19:08.240 --> 0:19:11.760 would be kind of very dull for him. So I 0:19:11.800 --> 0:19:15.679 thought that having someone else around the house would make 0:19:16.000 --> 0:19:20.639 make it a little more homey for him. But I 0:19:20.720 --> 0:19:23.399 hadn't chosen Christina. Christina was brought to me and it 0:19:23.520 --> 0:19:27.120 was just she was just there. This wild looking thing 0:19:29.560 --> 0:19:31.880 seemed a little bit of training to live in a home, 0:19:31.960 --> 0:19:36.159 so obviously she hadn't been brought up with anything. I 0:19:36.359 --> 0:19:39.639 just thought any child living under my roof had to 0:19:39.800 --> 0:19:40.640 be taught. 0:19:40.320 --> 0:19:43.480 Something meaning like what kind of things like you mean 0:19:43.560 --> 0:19:45.560 normal like rules and. 0:19:45.600 --> 0:19:48.320 Well rules, yeah, the rules. I don't think that our 0:19:48.400 --> 0:19:49.640 rules were terribly. 0:19:49.320 --> 0:19:54.000 Strict, really, I mean I felt like they were strict. 0:19:54.720 --> 0:19:59.560 Well maybe you thought so, that most kids do, but 0:19:59.600 --> 0:20:01.280 there were the the same rule as my kid's head. 0:20:03.280 --> 0:20:06.119 Christina hesitates. You can see it's hard for her to 0:20:06.160 --> 0:20:07.800 talk back to Isabelle even now. 0:20:08.520 --> 0:20:12.160 But then she says, but David didn't have rules, No, 0:20:12.240 --> 0:20:13.120 he didn't need any. 0:20:14.760 --> 0:20:17.760 He is the most perfect person I've ever. 0:20:17.680 --> 0:20:24.159 Raised, Christina. Another person she happened to have raised, is 0:20:24.160 --> 0:20:28.000 seated a couple feet away from her. Christina stares ahead blankly, 0:20:28.359 --> 0:20:31.960 not saying anything. So I press Isabelle, Well, you must 0:20:31.960 --> 0:20:34.160 have done something wrong. I mean it's only. 0:20:36.560 --> 0:20:40.840 Very little. You'd be surprised how perfect he was. 0:20:40.840 --> 0:20:44.399 Was that hard though, being like side by side with 0:20:44.440 --> 0:20:45.200 someone who. 0:20:45.040 --> 0:20:47.280 Is just so No, I think it was good for. 0:20:47.200 --> 0:20:50.800 Her, Christina, Is that is that how you feel? 0:20:50.960 --> 0:20:51.720 It was hard? 0:20:52.000 --> 0:20:52.440 Yeah? 0:20:52.520 --> 0:20:54.040 It was really hard. 0:20:55.280 --> 0:20:58.000 Something else that's been hard is finding the courage to 0:20:58.040 --> 0:21:01.040 ask the question that brought her here. Christina gives it 0:21:01.080 --> 0:21:10.840 a shot, but after some throat clearing again, she goes silent, 0:21:13.119 --> 0:21:13.920 go ahead and ask. 0:21:16.520 --> 0:21:22.600 I think the one thing that I have kind of 0:21:22.640 --> 0:21:27.359 always wondered is do you remember I think it was 0:21:27.560 --> 0:21:34.720 in tenth grade and I had been playing basketball and 0:21:34.760 --> 0:21:36.720 you told me that I had to get my grades 0:21:36.800 --> 0:21:39.000 up where I couldn't play basketball anymore. 0:21:39.119 --> 0:21:39.760 Do you remember that? 0:21:41.960 --> 0:21:42.120 No? 0:21:45.160 --> 0:21:48.879 Okay, so I didn't get my grades up and I 0:21:48.960 --> 0:21:49.879 had to quit the team. 0:21:50.960 --> 0:21:55.080 I don't remember that, Agittall, I don't know. I still. 0:21:58.000 --> 0:22:00.840 Was. It was devastating for me. 0:22:01.720 --> 0:22:05.680 Why did you get your grade out there? 0:22:06.400 --> 0:22:10.200 Yeah? 0:22:10.359 --> 0:22:13.120 I asked Christina if she could explain to Isabelle why 0:22:13.200 --> 0:22:15.000 losing basketball hurt so much. 0:22:15.720 --> 0:22:16.679 Not without crying. 0:22:20.640 --> 0:22:21.320 I felt like. 0:22:23.000 --> 0:22:24.480 It was like the one thing that I. 0:22:24.400 --> 0:22:26.840 Was really good at. 0:22:27.920 --> 0:22:32.840 Are you surprised to hear Christina talk about how much 0:22:32.880 --> 0:22:34.679 she loved basketball? 0:22:34.760 --> 0:22:34.840 Like? 0:22:34.960 --> 0:22:36.480 Was that something that you knew back then? 0:22:37.200 --> 0:22:37.800 I didn't know what. 0:22:37.960 --> 0:22:41.240 No, did Christina? Did you ever express it? 0:22:42.440 --> 0:22:46.240 I don't think she did. I don't think so. No, 0:22:46.400 --> 0:22:47.320 I don't think you did. 0:22:49.640 --> 0:22:54.680 I think the reason why, like it still affects me now, 0:22:54.720 --> 0:22:56.440 it is because I didn't fight. 0:22:56.280 --> 0:23:01.760 For it, and how could she have. She never felt 0:23:01.760 --> 0:23:04.560 like she had the right to stop her feet to 0:23:04.600 --> 0:23:08.560 slam the bedroom door in so many words, to act 0:23:08.640 --> 0:23:11.880 like someone's kid. I thought that maybe if I could 0:23:11.880 --> 0:23:14.880 get Isabelle to put herself in Christina's shoes, it might 0:23:14.920 --> 0:23:19.040 help her understand. Was there anything that you can think 0:23:19.080 --> 0:23:22.600 of that's comparable from your own life, Isabelle, Like something 0:23:22.600 --> 0:23:25.480 that you really felt very passionate about, like the thing 0:23:25.480 --> 0:23:29.080 that you really that was your great love. 0:23:34.880 --> 0:23:37.600 Not really. I always wanted to go to school more 0:23:37.640 --> 0:23:42.600 than I did. I really wanted a good education, which 0:23:42.960 --> 0:23:44.680 of the country you weren't able to get. 0:23:46.200 --> 0:23:49.560 Her father was a rancher, Isabelle says, and her mom 0:23:49.600 --> 0:23:51.879 died when she was little, so her dad raised the 0:23:51.960 --> 0:23:55.800 kids by himself, and Isabelle, being the eldest, had a 0:23:55.800 --> 0:23:56.960 lot of responsibility. 0:23:57.520 --> 0:23:59.879 I used to miss school every year when I go 0:24:00.359 --> 0:24:03.199 to be a certain age and had to herd cattle. 0:24:04.600 --> 0:24:07.520 So I'd missed about two months or a month of 0:24:07.560 --> 0:24:10.360 school every year when I was old enough to do this. 0:24:12.880 --> 0:24:14.639 But I was first in my class from the day 0:24:14.680 --> 0:24:16.720 I started till the day I finished. I was never 0:24:16.760 --> 0:24:18.520 anything but first in my class. 0:24:19.359 --> 0:24:21.520 Was that typical that a lot of kids in the 0:24:21.880 --> 0:24:23.119 class have to miss? 0:24:23.760 --> 0:24:29.320 No, just me and well we were brought up by 0:24:29.359 --> 0:24:32.119 our dad. Men bring up children differently than women. 0:24:32.520 --> 0:24:34.640 Yeah, and what ways? How do you mean? 0:24:34.840 --> 0:24:37.119 I mean my dad didn't teach me to ride horseback. 0:24:37.160 --> 0:24:38.800 He just threw me on a horse and told me 0:24:38.840 --> 0:24:41.960 to go. You know a woman wouldn't do that, And 0:24:42.040 --> 0:24:48.199 don't think not likely. My father was quite fond of me. 0:24:48.240 --> 0:24:52.560 Actually, yeah, how far did you go in school? 0:24:53.119 --> 0:24:58.120 Just? Grade nine? I took grade nine by correspondence, so. 0:24:58.080 --> 0:25:00.920 You didn't You never ended up getting there the high 0:25:00.960 --> 0:25:01.600 school degree. 0:25:02.040 --> 0:25:07.040 No. Yeah, school was an important thing to me because 0:25:07.080 --> 0:25:09.280 I felt that's how you'd make your living. 0:25:09.640 --> 0:25:11.800 Yeah, but I. 0:25:11.840 --> 0:25:14.159 Remember when I was through school, my stepmother looking in 0:25:14.200 --> 0:25:17.000 the paper and she found a dishwashing job for me. 0:25:17.640 --> 0:25:20.399 She thought that I always capable of was washing dishes 0:25:20.400 --> 0:25:27.520 in some restaurant. I felt very insulted. It always surprised 0:25:27.520 --> 0:25:30.080 me when kids didn't want to get all the education 0:25:30.160 --> 0:25:31.160 they possibly could. 0:25:32.720 --> 0:25:34.760 Isabelle motions towards Christina. 0:25:35.600 --> 0:25:39.159 There's only so far you can go on basketball. I 0:25:39.359 --> 0:25:44.040 always felt your education was more important. But as a kid, 0:25:44.119 --> 0:25:48.159 sometimes you know, you don't see that. I knew. I 0:25:48.240 --> 0:25:51.200 tried to teach her to be self sufficient because I 0:25:51.280 --> 0:25:53.640 knew that she'd only have herself to depend upon. 0:26:02.280 --> 0:26:05.400 Isabelle wanted to give Christina something she never got herself, 0:26:05.880 --> 0:26:10.560 a good education. But by depriving Christina basketball, Isabelle took 0:26:10.600 --> 0:26:14.240 away just that. At the time, though she didn't know it. 0:26:15.160 --> 0:26:17.959 What Isabelle did know was that when Christina showed up 0:26:17.960 --> 0:26:20.560 at her door thirty years ago, she was already in 0:26:20.600 --> 0:26:24.280 her sixties. Isabelle was old, and if she were to die, 0:26:24.480 --> 0:26:27.679 Christina would be left all alone. She'd only become a 0:26:27.720 --> 0:26:30.800 foster child because no one in her extended family had 0:26:30.840 --> 0:26:34.080 stepped up to take her in. She had no one else. 0:26:36.920 --> 0:26:41.320 What did you know about Christina's childhood before she met you? 0:26:43.160 --> 0:26:48.119 Not much of anything that I can remember. Like her 0:26:48.200 --> 0:26:51.880 mother was ment lel. I guess she knows that. And 0:26:54.080 --> 0:26:56.159 I lost my mother when I was five, and my 0:26:56.280 --> 0:26:58.960 father eventually had a nervous breakdown, so I knew what 0:26:59.000 --> 0:26:59.960 it was like to live with them. 0:27:00.359 --> 0:27:04.760 Challenged Bertha, Oh, what was it like? 0:27:06.280 --> 0:27:10.320 Terrible? It was horrible. You didn't know if someone was 0:27:10.359 --> 0:27:12.399 going to kill you today or tomorrow, or what the 0:27:12.440 --> 0:27:13.439 heck was going to happen. 0:27:14.000 --> 0:27:15.840 That's not an exaggeration. You're really were. 0:27:16.040 --> 0:27:18.879 It's not an exaggeration. I remember taking my little brother 0:27:18.920 --> 0:27:25.080 and sister outside and trying to hide them. He was 0:27:25.160 --> 0:27:28.760 left with five little children. Yeah, and he was terrified 0:27:28.760 --> 0:27:30.840 that they were going to take the kids away from him. 0:27:32.600 --> 0:27:34.359 And I used to sit by his bed and hold 0:27:34.400 --> 0:27:37.240 his hand, and one day he said to me, Isabelle, 0:27:37.240 --> 0:27:40.919 why do you keep holding my hand? And in my 0:27:41.040 --> 0:27:43.560 own way, I was trying to let him know that 0:27:43.680 --> 0:27:49.800 we all loved him. 0:27:49.920 --> 0:27:52.680 Isabelle eventually placed her father in a mental hospital. 0:27:53.520 --> 0:27:54.400 I admitted him. 0:27:56.240 --> 0:27:58.399 Oh, and you were how old. 0:27:58.880 --> 0:28:00.560 At that time? I was appo fourteen. 0:28:00.960 --> 0:28:02.320 Wow, that's a big burden. 0:28:03.119 --> 0:28:07.000 Yeah, it was. And I thought, here, I'm fourteen, What 0:28:07.040 --> 0:28:08.120 the hell am I doing here? 0:28:15.440 --> 0:28:19.359 All the while, as Isabelle talks, Christina, seated in an 0:28:19.440 --> 0:28:23.200 armchair beside her, listens quietly, her hands gripping the armrest. 0:28:24.280 --> 0:28:27.320 Without looking at Isabelle, she makes her presence known. 0:28:28.520 --> 0:28:31.359 I have many memories of visiting my mom in the 0:28:31.400 --> 0:28:35.120 mental hospital when I was young, like seven, eight nine, 0:28:35.240 --> 0:28:36.600 kind of age ten. 0:28:38.600 --> 0:28:39.120 It's weird. 0:28:39.360 --> 0:28:43.120 It's a really weird experience to go knowing that the 0:28:43.160 --> 0:28:45.040 other people are mentally unstable and. 0:28:45.280 --> 0:28:47.000 You can't predict what they're going to do. 0:28:47.200 --> 0:28:49.040 Yeah, and my mom was, you know, kind of a 0:28:49.120 --> 0:28:53.600 zombie because of all the medication, and obviously it was 0:28:53.640 --> 0:28:57.760 like sad and upset that she had to be there 0:28:57.760 --> 0:28:58.400 and wasn't with me. 0:29:02.520 --> 0:29:02.840 Yeah. 0:29:02.880 --> 0:29:03.920 It was an awful place. 0:29:05.520 --> 0:29:08.080 It makes you grow up way too fast. 0:29:08.280 --> 0:29:11.240 Yeah, that's right. I mean I was never a kid 0:29:11.320 --> 0:29:13.560 until I got married and had my own kids, and 0:29:13.560 --> 0:29:16.320 then I had a lot of fund raising my own children. Yeah. 0:29:16.360 --> 0:29:19.120 I think that's why I was a nanny, because I 0:29:19.120 --> 0:29:22.600 could be around kids and have a childhood with all 0:29:22.600 --> 0:29:23.480 these other children. 0:29:23.720 --> 0:29:27.400 Yeah, that's what I what I did. I grew up 0:29:27.440 --> 0:29:31.400 with my own children. That's what was my childhood. Yeah, 0:29:31.480 --> 0:29:33.640 you know, I'd play with my children just like I 0:29:33.720 --> 0:29:34.480 was one of them. 0:29:34.600 --> 0:29:37.320 Yeah, yeah, I did the same thing. 0:29:38.800 --> 0:29:40.600 One day, one of the neighbors looked at me, one 0:29:40.600 --> 0:29:43.600 of the little girls, and she's just how old are you? 0:29:53.880 --> 0:29:56.880 These were stories that neither Christina nor Isabelle had ever 0:29:56.920 --> 0:30:00.520 told each other. Watching them connect like this, it feels 0:30:00.560 --> 0:30:03.240 like a good time to bring the subject back to basketball. 0:30:03.600 --> 0:30:06.680 How much over the past thirty years, Christina's fretted over 0:30:06.720 --> 0:30:11.240 Isabel's decision. Knowing this now, I ask Isabelle, would you 0:30:11.240 --> 0:30:12.320 have done things differently. 0:30:12.800 --> 0:30:15.000 Oh, I wished I had a known more about it 0:30:15.040 --> 0:30:16.960 at the time, But I mean, I still have no 0:30:17.040 --> 0:30:20.120 regrets about it. 0:30:20.120 --> 0:30:22.960 It's as though Isabelle just doesn't understand what the word 0:30:23.120 --> 0:30:28.000 regret means. So I offer a working definition. If we 0:30:28.000 --> 0:30:29.960 were to set off in a time machine where we 0:30:30.000 --> 0:30:32.240 could return to that time, and Christina were to. 0:30:32.240 --> 0:30:35.840 Say, I know what you're saying, but frankly, I don't 0:30:35.840 --> 0:30:39.120 know what i'd do. You know, I really don't. It 0:30:39.160 --> 0:30:41.000 would depend on what kind of a mood I'm in. 0:30:41.280 --> 0:30:43.040 If you were in the mood that you're in right now, 0:30:44.280 --> 0:30:45.600 I really have no idea. 0:30:47.000 --> 0:30:48.760 I could give you a lot of BS and tell 0:30:48.800 --> 0:30:52.160 you how good it would have been, but it wouldn't 0:30:52.160 --> 0:30:52.800 be in the truth. 0:30:54.720 --> 0:30:56.400 I think like a lot of people would just give 0:30:56.480 --> 0:30:57.960 Christina the BS. 0:30:58.160 --> 0:31:02.320 Yeah, I don't do that. I usually tell it truth. 0:31:06.000 --> 0:31:08.960 Like most I can lie upwards of ten thousand times 0:31:09.000 --> 0:31:12.920 a day. It helps ease the friction of getting through life. 0:31:12.960 --> 0:31:16.040 People ask how I am, and I say fine, does 0:31:16.080 --> 0:31:19.160 this jumpsuit make my ass look fat? And I say no? 0:31:20.000 --> 0:31:23.440 And so on, lying all the day long until bedtime, 0:31:23.840 --> 0:31:26.959 at which point I'm not sure the lying stops. I 0:31:27.000 --> 0:31:30.840 can probably lie in my dreams. In other words, I 0:31:30.920 --> 0:31:34.000 hold lying to be the greatest gift God gave to man. 0:31:34.720 --> 0:31:37.480 But even with all of our lies and best intentions, 0:31:37.880 --> 0:31:41.200 we still can't escape hurting one another. I don't think 0:31:41.280 --> 0:31:44.000 Isabelle is a cruel woman, but I do think she 0:31:44.120 --> 0:31:47.520 knows that hurting people and being hurt is the price 0:31:47.560 --> 0:31:48.960 one pays for being human. 0:31:50.520 --> 0:31:52.840 There is nothing out of the ordinary in our lives, 0:31:52.840 --> 0:31:57.080 but just you know, even ordinary lives are could upsetting. 0:31:57.160 --> 0:32:01.040 Sometimes it's a decision that was made when she was younger. 0:32:01.040 --> 0:32:04.360 It wasn't the right one, but how many wrong decisions 0:32:04.400 --> 0:32:09.080 are made as we go along. Regretting something is a 0:32:09.080 --> 0:32:13.480 waste of time. You move on find something else to 0:32:13.520 --> 0:32:14.840 be passionate about. 0:32:24.240 --> 0:32:27.680 In spite of their similar childhoods, Isabelle and Christina see 0:32:27.680 --> 0:32:31.920 the world so differently. Christina is a dreamer, and for her, 0:32:32.280 --> 0:32:34.880 the best possible world is the one that's always just 0:32:34.960 --> 0:32:38.640 out of reach. But for Isabelle, it's not about pursuing 0:32:38.720 --> 0:32:41.720 the best possible world at all. It's about making the 0:32:41.760 --> 0:32:45.120 best of this world, the one you're stuck in, and 0:32:45.440 --> 0:32:47.920 evidently with the people you're stuck with. 0:32:48.840 --> 0:32:51.320 I wouldn't look after her. If you know, if I 0:32:51.360 --> 0:32:53.800 didn't care about it, it would have been different, I think, 0:32:54.520 --> 0:32:56.240 you know. But I was interested in what she did 0:32:56.240 --> 0:32:59.000 and how she progressed, and wanted her to do well 0:32:59.040 --> 0:33:02.320 at school, do well and everything. And I was very 0:33:02.320 --> 0:33:05.480 proud of her when she did. She was with us 0:33:05.520 --> 0:33:10.480 a long time. Couldn't get rid of her. Just kidding. 0:33:14.920 --> 0:33:19.120 Isabelle pauses, and then she says, appraisingly, she. 0:33:19.160 --> 0:33:27.440 Deserves a good life. I do have one good and 0:33:27.480 --> 0:33:30.280 I think it's better because she had some stability in it, 0:33:30.760 --> 0:33:32.320 which I feel she got to my house. 0:33:41.040 --> 0:33:44.680 I'll get on that side. We say our goodbyes and 0:33:44.760 --> 0:33:48.200 head to the car. Outside Isabelle's, the parking lot has 0:33:48.240 --> 0:33:49.800 grown dark. Thank you. 0:33:50.200 --> 0:33:50.400 Yeah. 0:33:53.920 --> 0:33:56.800 As we get into the rental car, Christina lets out a. 0:33:56.800 --> 0:34:11.839 Sigh, Well, so did how did you feel then about that? 0:34:17.760 --> 0:34:19.920 It was just really intense and there's a lot of 0:34:19.920 --> 0:34:23.279 things that she said that were like that were very 0:34:23.360 --> 0:34:29.080 hurtful to me. It's like she affected me tonight, but 0:34:29.320 --> 0:34:32.720 not in the way that she used to. I didn't 0:34:32.840 --> 0:34:37.200 get I didn't get the fuzzy teddy bear cuddly. 0:34:38.480 --> 0:34:38.680 Thing. 0:34:38.719 --> 0:34:42.560 And that's okay that I didn't get that, but what 0:34:42.600 --> 0:34:48.280 I got was her, and and it wasn't everything I needed. 0:34:49.840 --> 0:34:56.319 But I feel like that's how she shows love. And 0:34:56.360 --> 0:34:58.640 it's not with hugs, and it's not with I love yous, 0:34:58.719 --> 0:35:05.040 and it's not with praise necessarily either. It's in a 0:35:05.080 --> 0:35:07.719 way that I understand now, Whereas before I just felt 0:35:07.800 --> 0:35:11.600 like she just didn't even like me, But now I 0:35:11.640 --> 0:35:15.759 can see that she loves me in her way and 0:35:15.840 --> 0:35:16.640 in the best way that. 0:35:16.600 --> 0:35:17.200 She knows how. 0:35:20.520 --> 0:35:23.280 In the end, it seems like this is why Christina 0:35:23.320 --> 0:35:26.200 came here, not to find out why Isabelle made her 0:35:26.239 --> 0:35:30.040 stop playing basketball, but to find out whether Isabelle loved her, 0:35:30.960 --> 0:35:35.000 And in her tough, straight shooting, slightly scary way, it's 0:35:35.040 --> 0:35:44.439 pretty clear she does. Do you know why I want 0:35:44.440 --> 0:35:48.080 to go to scott Haa Park. No, it's a surprise. 0:35:48.680 --> 0:35:50.480 Oh oh, it's. 0:35:50.320 --> 0:35:53.879 Not a big surprise. The next morning, before heading home, 0:35:54.239 --> 0:35:56.600 I take Christina and her husband Levi out to a 0:35:56.640 --> 0:36:02.480 nearby park. Oh have pits, I know. I have a 0:36:02.480 --> 0:36:06.040 paper bag I've been carrying with me since Brooklyn. It's 0:36:06.080 --> 0:36:10.759 a good thing you're wearing running shoes. When the anticipation 0:36:10.920 --> 0:36:14.440 reaches at Zenith, I revealed to Christina and Levi what's 0:36:14.480 --> 0:36:22.560 in the bag out of basketball, which I think they'd 0:36:22.600 --> 0:36:24.800 sort of guessed since we were now standing by a 0:36:24.880 --> 0:36:28.680 basketball court and I was dribbling a spherical paper bag. 0:36:29.480 --> 0:36:32.800 I turned to LEVI, have you ever seen Christina play 0:36:33.000 --> 0:36:33.960 basketball before? 0:36:35.160 --> 0:36:37.600 Maybe? Not? Yeah, I don't think we've ever played. 0:36:38.320 --> 0:36:41.480 Christina says she hasn't played in over ten years. She 0:36:41.520 --> 0:36:45.120 doesn't even watch basketball on TV anymore. I hold out 0:36:45.120 --> 0:36:48.600 the ball and Christina looks at it. Then she looks 0:36:48.640 --> 0:36:52.840 at Levi, and then she takes it from my hands. 0:36:54.400 --> 0:37:00.120 Check check, Oh rusty. 0:37:01.080 --> 0:37:03.520 But when she gets going, it seems to come back 0:37:03.520 --> 0:37:03.799 to her. 0:37:04.640 --> 0:37:08.880 Oh, behind the back, behind the back again. 0:37:11.560 --> 0:37:12.440 It goes. 0:37:14.400 --> 0:37:18.200 Trash talking, calling her own shots, driving hard to the basket. 0:37:18.800 --> 0:37:20.759 There was a different sign to Christina that was coming 0:37:20.800 --> 0:37:23.640 out on the court. It happened suddenly and easily. 0:37:24.719 --> 0:37:26.600 You're going to get that. I think it's too nothing 0:37:26.680 --> 0:37:30.719 at this point. I don't think i've scored it, have I. 0:37:30.800 --> 0:37:33.240 The best basketball players are said to have an almost 0:37:33.320 --> 0:37:37.239 supernatural ability to see a little head, to anticipate what 0:37:37.280 --> 0:37:41.400 will happen next. But Christina and Levi aren't that good, 0:37:42.040 --> 0:37:44.680 and so they play like a couple of kids for 0:37:44.760 --> 0:37:48.480 whom the future doesn't matter or the past, and in 0:37:48.520 --> 0:37:57.360 that space between, it seems like a pretty good life. 0:37:51.840 --> 0:38:01.760 Okay, I love you. 0:38:28.360 --> 0:38:34.240 Now that the Fernentures return into its goodwill. 0:38:33.800 --> 0:38:41.719 Home, Now that the last month's rent is scheming with. 0:38:41.920 --> 0:38:48.840 The damaged possible, take this moment to dissolve. If we 0:38:49.000 --> 0:38:50.320 meant it, if we. 0:38:50.280 --> 0:38:54.920 Tried, we remember felt around for far too. 0:38:56.880 --> 0:39:01.759 Take from Things That Accidentally Zero. 0:39:03.960 --> 0:39:07.080 Heavyweight is hosted and produced by me Jonathan Goldstein along 0:39:07.120 --> 0:39:10.640 with Khalila Holt. The senior producer is Caitlin Roberts. Editing 0:39:10.680 --> 0:39:14.120 by Jorge just, Alex Bloomberg and Wendy Door. Special thanks 0:39:14.160 --> 0:39:17.760 to Emily Condent, Misha Gluberman, Stevie Lane, and Jackie Cohen. 0:39:18.160 --> 0:39:21.440 The show was mixed by Kate Bolinski, music by Christine Fellows, 0:39:21.560 --> 0:39:24.920 John K. Sampson, and Edwin. Additional music credits for this 0:39:24.960 --> 0:39:28.320 episode can be found on our website Gimbletmedia dot com 0:39:28.360 --> 0:39:31.720 slash Heavyweight. Our theme song is by The Weaker Bands 0:39:31.760 --> 0:39:34.640 courtesy of Epitaph Records, and our ad music is by 0:39:34.680 --> 0:39:38.200 Hailey Shaw. Follow us on Twitter at Heavyweight or email 0:39:38.320 --> 0:39:41.160 us at Heavyweight at gimletmedia dot com. We'll have a 0:39:41.200 --> 0:39:44.120 new hot puppy of an episode next week. 0:39:45.440 --> 0:39:58.920 Way, so, Jonathan, you have a wife. 0:39:58.960 --> 0:40:03.160 I hear you say yes. Ye can't keep looking new over, can't. 0:40:03.160 --> 0:40:09.359 I think I think I probably looked best from your perspective. 0:40:10.680 --> 0:40:13.160 I think it's a good look for me. It's kind 0:40:13.200 --> 0:40:13.720 of blurry,