and Tom Schwartz

00:00:13
Speaker 1: And we're back in La It's Lala.

00:00:16
Speaker 2: Motherfucking can't yeh, motherfucking ran I mean, I can't believe Lalla. Hold on first all e'scept the stage. We are back in Los Angeles after five weeks on the road, So I am beyond grateful to be here, even in a COVID environment. It is nice to be home.

00:00:38
Speaker 3: So even though we've been gone for over five weeks. Actually we went from Puerto Rico to Marco Island, to the Blue Ridge Mountains.

00:00:47
Speaker 2: To North Carolina at my Sleepway camp. Well, I mean, don't I mean give the details.

00:00:52
Speaker 3: So Randall has this place that he's been going to for a really long time. We went from like a fifteen square foot home on the water in Marco Island, Florida.

00:01:04
Speaker 2: Very bougie.

00:01:05
Speaker 3: You just rowed so bougie, which I love it. But again, like I'm from Utah, like I grew up camping. I grew up in the woods, you know, but as I got older, I got a little bougie. But anyway, Randall his camp that he's been going to, when did you start going?

00:01:23
Speaker 2: I think I started around six or seven years old, Camp Highlander and Asheville in the Blue Ridge Mountains. I started as a camper, went on to a counselor. And then the coolest part of it all is my kids go there as well. So here's the cool thing. Lalla has been there. You've been there many times to drop off the girls when they go to Sleepway camp. And because it's COVID, they had these they gave us an opportunity to fly up in the last minute go to camp, and we went and did.

00:01:53
Speaker 1: They did it like a family type of camp for us.

00:01:55
Speaker 2: For us, just like a like a small private thing, which was the kindest thing. And so it is La, La, me, your mother, Yeah, Lennon and Riley. Yes, we get up there. Nobody knows what to expect because listen, it's not like a regular like where they have these family camps. It's like the Emmett camp. And so we go up there, just us. We get up there and they have a schedule for us. And I remember day one we had.

00:02:20
Speaker 1: Just come, which Lord knows. I do not like a schedule.

00:02:24
Speaker 3: Like when someone tells me the bell rings at eight thirty for breakfast, I'm like, and you will be hearing me scream, fuck you happen.

00:02:31
Speaker 2: You didn't show up? Once till eleven.

00:02:33
Speaker 1: So let's just call that right, Yeah, yeah, obviously.

00:02:36
Speaker 2: But the cool thing is you and I, You and I, out of all the activites obviously, Hey, let's let's rewind for one second. The kids had the greatest experience a time because they're not going to get a regular camp this year, so they got a little five day mini camp. But here's what's cool for us. We go there, we're doing all the activities, We're watching the kids, they're living their best life. Were with another couple and their son, so that that was fun. You and I fell in love with a new activity. So besides pickleball specialist, we are now tell everybody.

00:03:07
Speaker 3: Doom archers, we are shooting springing bow and arrows like gangsters.

00:03:15
Speaker 2: Tell my score.

00:03:16
Speaker 3: Randall's score was forty five. A perfect score is fifty.

00:03:21
Speaker 2: That's five arrows, so was the inner circle in the inner yellow. I got four yellows and one red. That is I have the camp record down.

00:03:30
Speaker 3: I'm gonna be honest me, just hitting the giant target was a win for me. I was like, what, I don't care what it hits, as long as it hits the circle.

00:03:40
Speaker 2: You know, tell everybody what I was doing last night on the internet.

00:03:43
Speaker 1: Okay, Randall goes through these obsessions.

00:03:46
Speaker 3: He was googling like youtubing archery videos of like these professionals.

00:03:52
Speaker 2: I'm going to my first competition.

00:03:53
Speaker 1: I cannot It's really Here's the thing.

00:03:57
Speaker 3: Randall's good at really weird shit, like the man can't play football or basketball to save his life.

00:04:04
Speaker 2: I don't even know the rules.

00:04:05
Speaker 3: But like the hardest things to do, he's great at.

00:04:09
Speaker 2: Could you give some examples.

00:04:11
Speaker 1: Archery is an example, ping pong ping pong. All these like weird water skiing.

00:04:18
Speaker 3: Water skiing, like things that are actually really difficult you're super athletic with.

00:04:22
Speaker 2: But here's the crazy thing. I was always pick last on every team as a child, so therefore my athletic ability was limited. But as I got older, I have come into my own and I love one.

00:04:34
Speaker 3: However, when Randall, when I saw Randall like Cam Highlander, his inner.

00:04:41
Speaker 1: Geek was on full display.

00:04:47
Speaker 2: Well, let me tell you. So they had a schedule for us from eight in the morning to five in the afternoon. Right, Lala participated every day from about twelve thirty lunchtime to about three thirty, so she was there at select activities. Although I didn't think I would make it eight hours day. I thought, oh, you know what, I'll be there like two three hours. I was there every morning, eight to five o'clock every day, and.

00:05:10
Speaker 1: We let your camper flag fly.

00:05:12
Speaker 2: Baby.

00:05:13
Speaker 3: I was like this grown ass man is like up and at him, ready to do whatever activity at eight in the morning.

00:05:20
Speaker 2: Can I tell you what it was like. It was like being a counselor again. I literally woke the kids up and I had this my friends and I love them, and I won't mention their names, but they were like having their best life couple vacation. Why I was taking their child. So I had our kids and then I had their twelve year old boy. So I had these three kids and I was like the counselor. I was like, up, let's go eight thirty breakfast.

00:05:45
Speaker 1: You're hurting my ears before and then I was.

00:05:47
Speaker 2: Like ten o'clock archery, eleven o'clock riflery, one o'clock lake, two o'clock blob. Followed by.

00:05:55
Speaker 3: Telling me like low back in the day, like I was like the fan favorite of counselors.

00:06:00
Speaker 1: I had like.

00:06:01
Speaker 3: Sixteen a waiting list of sixteen. I was like, oh my gosh, you're such a nerd.

00:06:05
Speaker 2: Yeah, but I was. I was a phenomenal counselor. There's a waiting list.

00:06:09
Speaker 1: Be honest, be honest, Rand, what you were like? Dorky?

00:06:14
Speaker 2: Right? I take offense to that.

00:06:16
Speaker 1: Really, I think I don't take when people you have.

00:06:20
Speaker 2: An artistic kid, I think area.

00:06:23
Speaker 1: That's what I like to say, too. We were nerds.

00:06:26
Speaker 2: Know what that means? I loved my life.

00:06:28
Speaker 1: It means you stayed at camp until you were eighteen twenty two.

00:06:32
Speaker 2: That is sad. No, See, I take offense to this. I loved being a counselor, and I loved working at Camp all the way through college. I really loved being part of the experience Camp Highlander for me. By the way, any of you who have children that are listening to this, please look into Camp Highlander. It is the greatest, most magical placed.

00:06:55
Speaker 1: Yeah that's a nice little plug for Camp Highlander.

00:06:58
Speaker 2: Dude, Well, you love it too, so don't bull. She'd been wearing the sweatshirt for three days. Not right now, but you have been that's true. Okay, we're gonna move off Camp Higland. But what I do want to say is, yes, I was very Camp was a big pran in life. And I'm gonna tell you one serious thing and I'm gonna let it go. The reason camp was part of my life is yesterday you watched me climb that rock wall, which is like big. It was like three stories right right. The reason I have the confidence at forty nine years old to climb up that wall like Spider Man this.

00:07:25
Speaker 1: Way, you were really fast. He was fast.

00:07:28
Speaker 2: And the reason is is that when I was a kid and I was petrified of rock climbing, big faces that like looking less, that were tough faces, like five to eight difficulties. So they encouraged me and I whitewater collect all these things I never would have done growing up in Miami. I got to do a camp. So I'm very very proud of my camp heritage. Maybe I geek a little bit to the left or right, but here's a thing I am very proud. And anybody that has a child, please send your kid to Sleepway Camp. It is epic. Okay, moving on from that, I want to talk about something that I have not gotten to talk about in a long time.

00:08:04
Speaker 1: Okay, what is it?

00:08:06
Speaker 2: Our guest today has a common love with me, and it's not Vander pump Rooles because yes, he is a star of vander Pump roles. Yeah, but he and I share the same love of poker. So we are going to have a poker party on this episode. Oh my god, Tom Schwartz is our guest today. So Tom Schwartz poker party.

00:08:26
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh. Super excited about Tom Schwartz.

00:08:30
Speaker 2: Oh wait, not excited about the poker party.

00:08:32
Speaker 1: I just don't care about it.

00:08:35
Speaker 2: You know, what I'm excited about for you is that you really haven't had a vander Pump like discussion of any sort, I know, in a few months, and you guys are.

00:08:44
Speaker 1: Not shooting me out. I'm like, here's the thing. I get it.

00:08:49
Speaker 3: We're in like this state of you know, the unknown, and there's a lot of people who are not doing what they would normally be doing. But I mean I would be filming the show right now with all my best friends, and now it's just like we're dinking around, twisting our thumbs, being.

00:09:09
Speaker 1: Like I wonder what we're gonna be doing today.

00:09:12
Speaker 3: Where normally it's like we have a schedule, Yo, you got to call time at this time, and you're gonna be going to Katie and Schwartzy's house right Well, the other thing is to talk about last night and you're like, oh my god, this is so fun.

00:09:25
Speaker 2: Well, and the other thing is is that all production has halted and now it's just starting to ramp back up. So I mean, assuming you know, you guys obviously gonna go back, it's just when. And I think it's weird for you guys because every summer for the last eight years you have shot at this time. So I'm excited for you.

00:09:40
Speaker 1: And you would almost be done.

00:09:42
Speaker 2: I'm excited for you and Tom to connect all things vander Popter.

00:09:46
Speaker 3: Here's the thing, though, whenever I'm at Katie's house, we have to be like Tom, if you're not gonna talk good shit, like, disengage. I don't want to hear your like PC shit. You know, like you being Switzerland ain't that fun in my gossip session.

00:10:03
Speaker 2: So how hold on a second? I mean, are you already lighting the shit up? I mean, hold on, did you just say he's two PC for you?

00:10:12
Speaker 3: He's too Switzerland. It's like if I want to talk shit about the season, but.

00:10:17
Speaker 2: Maybe he's that guy Lalami, he is that guy, So what do you want to do? D No?

00:10:22
Speaker 3: But you're like you guys, get gussp about vander Pump's like, he's the worst gossiper ever.

00:10:26
Speaker 2: Oh, I think he's good. I'm gonna I'm gonna ask him. I'm gonna say, do you have anything that you know about it?

00:10:31
Speaker 1: You could pull it out of him. But Rand, you're a good gossiper.

00:10:34
Speaker 3: Like when I want to go just steamroll over everybody behind their backs in.

00:10:38
Speaker 1: Bed, you go there with me.

00:10:41
Speaker 2: That's not true.

00:10:42
Speaker 1: You're such a fucking liar. This podcast is about truth, Okay.

00:10:47
Speaker 2: I do like listening to the bullshit that you got.

00:10:51
Speaker 3: You also like partaking, Okay, sometimes you and I troll the Graham and talk shit on everybody. It's our favorite thing to do.

00:10:57
Speaker 2: This is this is not true. I'm a forty nine your old man.

00:11:01
Speaker 1: You're a shit talker, Okay, somewhat.

00:11:04
Speaker 2: I want to tell you one other thing about my other obsession.

00:11:07
Speaker 1: Okay, what is it?

00:11:08
Speaker 4: So?

00:11:08
Speaker 2: You know how we ski it every day? Water skin. You know I love water skiin I always have since you met me. Yeah, So I got really obsessed again with skiing, and I you know, I've lost a little bit of weight and I'm still working on that. So I reached out to one of the top water skiers in the world. Couldn't help myself.

00:11:26
Speaker 1: I can't.

00:11:27
Speaker 2: I'm going to Florida, I think in like two or three weeks for a full week water ski camp. Yeah, I love it. You're coming.

00:11:35
Speaker 1: It sounds like a nice little vacation for myself.

00:11:38
Speaker 2: The hell.

00:11:40
Speaker 4: So.

00:11:40
Speaker 1: But it no mess, that's a vacation.

00:11:43
Speaker 2: But I'll be on the water every day, just shreddy.

00:11:46
Speaker 1: Can I tell you this is how Randall works. He becomes obsessed with pickleball.

00:11:49
Speaker 3: And he's like, the most pickaball player in the world is coming to the house on Monday lot and I'm like, okay, right, and then it's like, by the way, I'm into archery, the best archerist or whatever you call God, bless you, thank you, is coming to the house on the law, Like I just have a house full of the best at the most random ship in the world, bless you, I agree, like Lebron James or some ship like I don't Sam Brady, like that would.

00:12:17
Speaker 2: Be I don't know how to play football or basketball.

00:12:19
Speaker 3: Becoming the best person in the world at a sport that a lot of people give a shit about.

00:12:23
Speaker 2: I give a shit about pickleball at a high level. But I want to tell you something.

00:12:26
Speaker 1: It's such a dork.

00:12:28
Speaker 2: I want to tell you something. First of all, I love pickleball and that will always be kind of at the forefront. But water skiing's pretty close behind right now. So and archery. I ordered all the ship last night, so they'll be at the in our backyard. Yeah, we're gonna shoot arrows in the backyard.

00:12:43
Speaker 1: It's so badass, it's so fun.

00:12:45
Speaker 3: Just in case, like the world gets a little more apocalyptic, we're gonna have to be out in these streets fucking killing our own food and shit.

00:12:54
Speaker 2: Okay, now you're taking it to another one.

00:12:55
Speaker 1: I don't know. We should prepare. We got fucking tea time over here in the room, Randall's triathlon best friend ever looking like he's in the apocalypse right now.

00:13:06
Speaker 2: I just want to tell you that Tyler is in character because he has a role in this next movie that I'm doing, and he's been waiting four months because we've been in COVID.

00:13:15
Speaker 1: Wait which movie is it?

00:13:17
Speaker 2: Midnight in the Switchcress, he's playing the role of the truck stop guy, so he's grown the beer and he's it's gangster.

00:13:23
Speaker 4: It is. I love it.

00:13:24
Speaker 1: Tea time.

00:13:24
Speaker 2: We're happy to have Tyler, but the triathling triathlate thing that that ended about two years.

00:13:30
Speaker 1: No, but that's how you met him and then he became your best friend ever.

00:13:33
Speaker 2: Correct?

00:13:34
Speaker 1: Correct?

00:13:34
Speaker 2: Okay, so we are now going to go to break. Okay, take a little time out, get back into the vander Pump Schwartz because you know what, I'm not as good in the vander Pump gossip world as you are, and I think your fans are excited to have a little vander Pump refresher this episode.

00:13:51
Speaker 1: Yes, I agree, So we'll be right back with shit talking.

00:13:58
Speaker 2: Or right back.

00:14:04
Speaker 3: We are back with the vander Pump's puppy dog, Tom Shorts.

00:14:09
Speaker 2: Oh my god. Yeah, that's how you introduce Tom fucking Schwartz.

00:14:14
Speaker 1: This is how I think of you, Tom Schwartz.

00:14:16
Speaker 3: You're a puppy and when you bite it hurts, but you're too damn cute.

00:14:20
Speaker 1: Stay mad at Oh.

00:14:23
Speaker 2: My god, Tom. First of all, I told her that this podcast is going to be the Schwartz fan er Pump slash party poker podcast, because how bad are we fucking missing live poker?

00:14:38
Speaker 4: I'm josen for it. First of all, First of all, it's just great to hear your voices.

00:14:42
Speaker 2: Can I say that, Oh my god, Oh my god, you're right, Lala, he is Switzerland.

00:14:47
Speaker 4: Oh I missed your face as it's great to hear your voices. Yes, I'm Jonsen for poker. Although I did have I'm not going to boil your listeners with my little poker fairy tale. But I did finally get to take a stab at the World Series of Poker.

00:15:02
Speaker 2: And online, the online series, the online version.

00:15:05
Speaker 4: I wouldn't stay with my mother in law Terry. Shout out to Terry, I love you. They wouldn't let me stand the strip because of Rona and they're the bosses. So I went and stayed with her and I final tabled my first event for a nice little score.

00:15:20
Speaker 2: Which is, by the way, which I want to explain to people about player. First of all, you know final table, I won a few events and all that, and it's amazing. And to play online, Tom, which you don't play. You know that much. You love poker, but you don't play it as much as.

00:15:37
Speaker 1: Like's not degenerate like you Randall correct, Yes.

00:15:40
Speaker 2: Very while always there, always there in my corner. Thanks back to you, Tom. Uh No, what I want to say is it is very hard to play online because you don't see the people you're playing with, and you're playing against like the best players in the world, especially in the WSLP. And the fact that you final table Tom and almost want a bracelet online. You mad respect, Matt.

00:16:02
Speaker 5: I appreciate, I appreciate love It was a fairy tale because right before I started the event, I did a little post and I referenced a famous quote by Norman Chad who commentates on the World Series a Poker on ESPN and I'm Dury money Maker's historic run.

00:16:16
Speaker 4: He says something along the lines of this is beyond fairy tale. It's inconceivable. And you know, cut to thirteen hours later and he was commentating on the final table I was playing it, so it was that's unbelieva full circle.

00:16:29
Speaker 2: How fun is it, Tom, when you get to that moment? I mean, I just for people that don't know or have an experience that when you get to that moment, tell people it's just the adrenaline, the it's just another thing.

00:16:41
Speaker 4: I've never jumped out of a plane, but I don't think it could even come close to comparing to what it feels like to make it to a final table.

00:16:48
Speaker 1: That's a bold statement.

00:16:50
Speaker 2: It feels like that.

00:16:51
Speaker 4: Wow, it feels it's exhilarating, and you experience every emotion. You don't show every emotion, but you experience it every emotion on the spectrum throughout a tournament. And now there's a lot of heartbreak, a lot of highs, a lot of lows, and it's very dramatic because it's been ecomatic.

00:17:05
Speaker 2: It is it is?

00:17:06
Speaker 1: Is it more dramatic than an episode of vander Pump Rules.

00:17:09
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, I want I want to give you a hug right now. I'll give you a verbal hug because like this is this it's been like clockwork for the past eight years for us. This has been such a big part of my life. And we're not filming right now. Everything's halted, and I just I'm a little I'm a little lost. I'm okay, okay.

00:17:27
Speaker 3: We were just talking about that shortsy how it's like we would be completing, almost completing another season. Like what are you doing with yourself right now? Because, like you said, it's been like clockwork that we've filmed the show.

00:17:40
Speaker 4: You said it, I mean, yeah, what maybe twenty percent for eight years that's twenty percent of my life. Everything I you know, do revolves around that show.

00:17:51
Speaker 2: And I just.

00:17:53
Speaker 4: I'm flailing a little bit, but for the most part, I'm okay, I.

00:17:57
Speaker 2: Gotta, I gotta, i gotta tell you something. Lawa just said that, I know you mentioned it, but she just said she's like, every year we're sitting at this time filming, it must be weird, Tom, because even for me, somebody for twenty years who's making, you know, consistently made movies, it's even a struggle for us to get a film up and running, so I know, even for television and our other TV shows. So it's got to be really odd for you to, you know, be waiting for a safe time for your show to go back. So I do feel for you.

00:18:29
Speaker 1: Actually that's a question.

00:18:32
Speaker 3: But you're you're on the side of like you're a part of the show, but you're also a restaurant owner and our show is based on a restaurant, Like do you have any inside scoop on like what the restaurant industry is going to look like when we.

00:18:48
Speaker 4: May go back. I mean this, I mean, I'm sure, as you guys have read in the headlines and something, it's been devastating to the industry as a whole. I mean, I've read multiple figures of like thirty to forty even fifty percent of the restaurants, you know, not coming back. I mean, we're looking at like a two hundred and forty billion dollar loss by the end of the year in the industry. And I mean it's tough that the restrictions are. They're dizzying, you know, they're ever evolving, and it's like, we do as much as we want to open, it's like putting your employees at at risk. A lot of employees don't feel comfortable coming back to work right now. And even if they do, are they going to make any money and we're going to be able to turn a profit. It's just it's it's a tough, tough business. You know, outside of a worldwide pandemic, it's a tough business with like thin margins. You know, you throw a pandemic in the mix, and I just, yeah, you know.

00:19:41
Speaker 2: It's brutal, I feel for you to do because the restaurant the right you know, all industries have been affected, you know, across the ward. But but but but the restaurant business, bar business and nightclub business I mean have been, you know, devastated, but.

00:19:55
Speaker 3: I know I know that you and in Sandoval have taken to one of the apps to raise money for your employees.

00:20:04
Speaker 1: Are you still doing that or.

00:20:06
Speaker 4: Like, well, we hit our goal of fifty k.

00:20:09
Speaker 2: Thanks always, it's amazing, that's amazing.

00:20:12
Speaker 4: It felt really special. And we have about fifty eight employees and we just split it evenly between everybody, and it felt really good to give back in some small way. But because we love I love our crew, I love our staff. It's like family. It's an extended family, just like you guys are. And yeah, yeah, it was nice to give back a little bit. But I stay in touch with a lot of them. Everybody's hanging in there, doing their thing and staying positive. I'm very optimistic about the rebound, although I've been doing everything I can to support, like local restaurants in the Valley West Hollywood and Katie went to the front yard. I don't know if you guys have been there. It's in Studio City the other day.

00:20:51
Speaker 1: Yeah, I've been with Katie.

00:20:52
Speaker 2: What is it?

00:20:53
Speaker 1: It's super good.

00:20:54
Speaker 2: It's super good.

00:20:55
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's just it's just so as I was walking in it, it's just also just kind of surreal. So I've been going on now. They're opening up some patios, they're adapting and putting picnic tables outside and whatnot. But it's like you walk in and it's kind of cyberpunk. You know, you get your wrist scand your temperature checked. They got the dual layer masks on everything. But afink you sit down, it's pretty cool. It feels pretty normal.

00:21:18
Speaker 2: I gotta tell you. You know, we've been we were in Florida, we were in Puerto Rico, and we were in North Carolina, and it's kind of becoming for me at least Tom, And I don't know for you, but for me, it's becoming kind of the normal. You walk in with your mask, you get your tumblester taken, but once you sit down at the table, you know you're with your people, your friends, your family, and the experience of dining is the same. I mean, you know, I think once you get through the initial walking in, once you get to your table, it does kind of feel pretty normal, at least because I've been doing it for four months now.

00:21:53
Speaker 3: You know, Tom, have you discussed maybe opening up like a party of Tom the patio or even just like pick up or Delawry.

00:22:04
Speaker 2: They should open up outside.

00:22:05
Speaker 1: I mean, at least has that been discussed for Tom Tom.

00:22:09
Speaker 4: We've brushed on it. I'm gonna have a good chat with Ken next week and see where we stand because we do have the retractable roof in the I know, yeah, no, it's just yeah, there's just I mean, I don't know.

00:22:22
Speaker 2: Okay, I'm gonna give it. I want to give a shout out to list fannerprop who you know as a friend and I love and Ken. I am going to campaign right here on this podcast that they need to open the patio and open the back retractable roof and let the main part of the bar be the walkthrough right to get to those areas or or enter from the back. Because I love the fried chicken sandwiches at Tom Tom restaurant.

00:22:50
Speaker 4: Okay, my god, it's like we.

00:22:51
Speaker 2: All know, I love chicken sandwiches.

00:22:53
Speaker 4: Yeah right, I miss I'm missconnecting with people though, like I'm in there, I'm a you guys know them big time, big time. What does the future of hugging look like? It's over.

00:23:07
Speaker 2: It's over till the vaccine, Till we have a vaccine. And I am optimistic and really rooting on our medical technology that we have today. I know we're in the third stage of the trials for a lot of them, and I am so optimistic and hopeful like everybody that, please God, let us find this vaccine so that the world can come back and function and flourish, and and so.

00:23:34
Speaker 1: That Tom Tom can open and we can get well.

00:23:37
Speaker 2: That's part of it. That's part of it, for sure. Yeah, No, honestly, I mean, I just I'm watching so much devastation financially in the world and people losing their lives, and the sooner we get this vaccine, hopefully, the sooner everybody can be safe and move forward.

00:23:52
Speaker 3: But I have to ask, what are what are you and Katie doing quarantine besides bunk peeps all day?

00:23:57
Speaker 2: Oh my god? I mean, why don't we have to go? Why does it always have to be a bumped peepee? It's one peep there's only one peepy when you're bumping.

00:24:06
Speaker 1: So there's two peepees girl. Oh all right, So tell me tell me what y'all do.

00:24:12
Speaker 4: I'm glad you asked, because I gotta say, maybe it hasn't been romantic in a traditional sense, but I think We've been flourishing sexually and in terms of just.

00:24:22
Speaker 2: Being happy together.

00:24:23
Speaker 4: I've definitely experienced some severe bouts of cabin fever, Like I have wander lust. Katie's Katie's more comfortable staying home. You know, she wants to be out too. But I think I just I have severe intense bouts of wanderlust, right, I just like I feel like I have to get out or I'm gonna snap again. I have I have like very little to complain about. This is coming from a place of privilege, but like I'm starting to lose it here and there. I have these little, these little episodes where like I just am like if I don't leave and see, like we got away once we went to Utah and we took a road trip. You guys, that was so fabulous, just like fresh water, streams, waterfalls, getting to connect with I miss my family. I'm getting I'm getting all excited about it.

00:25:07
Speaker 3: That's what it is is that you you think about like all of the little things that you know, like we took Oh, I'm just gonna walk into a restaurant or I'm gonna hop on a plane to go see my mom and dad. It's like all these tiny things where you're like, what the fuck. I totally just thought that was normal life.

00:25:25
Speaker 1: That was a privilege. That was a privilege by the.

00:25:27
Speaker 2: Way it was normal, by the way it was normal for all of us, And it was a privilege that we kind of, I think, just took for granted. Now it's been taken from us, and now we have to We are all wanting this so bad that I think when we get it back, we're never gonna take it for granted.

00:25:45
Speaker 4: Never ever, yeah, ever.

00:25:47
Speaker 3: But I love to hear that you and Katie are like because here's the thing, Like, you don't have to be bumping peepees to like have romantic time during quarantine. You know, sometimes Randall and I will just hold hands in bed and watch Ozark, and it's like the sweetest thing ever.

00:26:00
Speaker 2: Yeah, very sweet.

00:26:02
Speaker 1: I don't know you wait, what'd you say?

00:26:05
Speaker 4: Such a great show. But I haven't felt particular sexy during this time. I'll say that pandemics are not sexy.

00:26:12
Speaker 1: Well yeah, duh.

00:26:13
Speaker 3: We're all like rolling right now, and I'm totally okay with it. Schwortzy, We're going to take a quick break, real quick. Let us let me take us into a break and then hold whatever thought you had perfect.

00:26:23
Speaker 2: We'll be right back with Tom Schwartz.

00:26:32
Speaker 1: We're back with motherfucking Tom Schwartz.

00:26:35
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.

00:26:37
Speaker 2: Tom, say it loud, and we're back at town. Tom. So I'm going to make sure I come see you and hang out because I miss you, buddy.

00:26:45
Speaker 3: You're allowed to hang out with Tom schwartzh I got permission.

00:26:48
Speaker 1: Yeah.

00:26:49
Speaker 4: I've been living vicariously through you a little bit. I saw you at the camp I'm in North Carolina you went to when you were growing up as a kid, and I was so jealous. I wasn't there with you.

00:26:57
Speaker 2: Oh my god. I I really hope that when the show comes back, we can all go out there. It'll be so fun.

00:27:02
Speaker 3: Randall wanted because we were just assuming that we would go back this year Schwartzy, and he was like, well for our group, for you guys, group trip, I should send you guys to my camp because you can social distance.

00:27:16
Speaker 2: It would have been bad at by the way, we could still do it when the show comes back.

00:27:20
Speaker 3: If you had to exile one new cast member to never return on vander Bump Rules again, who would it be, Schwartze.

00:27:27
Speaker 2: You know, I can never answer.

00:27:30
Speaker 3: I told you, I literally said before I came on, I said, Schwartzy, don't talk shit with us.

00:27:36
Speaker 2: I have a question for Schwartz.

00:27:37
Speaker 4: Okay, let me marinate on that.

00:27:40
Speaker 2: We'll get you in like eight episodes from now. You can come back here, right. I have a question for Schwartz. I don't know if i'll answer yes, but we have a question. So I know that you know some of the cast members will not be returning, and and you know for a variety of reasons. What is your take? You know, how does that make you feel? And I'm not asking for any gossip or dirt. I'm just saying, like, how how do you feel just about losing family members? You know, because you've been with the show since for eight years, you know, whereas Lala you've been in the show five right, yeah, so you even have eight years on you from the beginning, So how does that make you feel?

00:28:21
Speaker 4: Honestly, I don't think i've processed it.

00:28:24
Speaker 1: Oh my god, Shorty, that's exactly what I said.

00:28:27
Speaker 4: It.

00:28:28
Speaker 2: Yeah, it is what I said.

00:28:30
Speaker 1: Okay, keep going, Shorty, No, No.

00:28:32
Speaker 4: I hope it doesn't seem like a cop out, but I just honestly haven't processed it. Maybe I'm running from it a little bit, or I'm in denial that it ever happened, But I don't know what the future. I'm optimistic about the future of vander Pulboles. I feel like the show still has legs. I still like it has so much life to give. But yeah, it's it's it's never going to be the same, that's for sure.

00:28:52
Speaker 2: But yeah, yeah, I mean, I mean, eight years is a long time to be with people, and you've been with them, so I was just curious. You know, you're thoughts, so I think, yeah, I think that's a fair answer. You know that you just yeah, processed again or or totally.

00:29:07
Speaker 4: I love my friends and I support them, and uh yeah, it's it's it's been rough, but we'll be okay, we'll get through it. Everybody will be okay. Of course, can I pivot even though this is your podcast? Can I pivot and.

00:29:22
Speaker 1: Switching gears?

00:29:25
Speaker 3: Yeah?

00:29:26
Speaker 2: I pivot all the time. Okay, we're pivoting, pivot toot.

00:29:30
Speaker 4: I love pivoting. I wanted to ask you guys, well, Randall, I know you had to hold production again, I think you did, but I just wanted to get any an update on Midnight in the switch Grass because I'm so excited about it. I had the great pleasure of seeing a few behind the scenes clips, and I gotta say it looks so good, Megan and and in Machine Gun, Telly chemistry is insane, popping off that screen like stoke for you in your directorial debut.

00:29:54
Speaker 2: Well, buddy, it has been.

00:29:55
Speaker 4: It is.

00:29:56
Speaker 2: First of all, it's been. Directing has been, you know, obviously the biggest high of my life. But at the same time, it has been the biggest challenge of my career, having started a movie pre COVID being shut down and then coming back and still not being able to finish completely. So we're actually going to finish the balance of the movie now in California, so very very close to home, just because the testing and all that is more readily available, so not to go into a whole bunch of things. So I am very, very excited. We're going to finish at the end of this month. So thank you for asking. And at the same time, it has been emotionally draining having have to start stop, start stop, But at the same time, it's a movie that my cast we've talked about. We're going to remember this for the rest of our lives. I mean we actually feel we actually feel like it's a television series because we've been with each other for like seven months now on and off, so it is it's been really, really tough. And then you have to stay in the moment creatively, like I have to start stop, start stop. So so that part of it's been tough. But at the same time, I'm still preserving the high of of doing this and and et cetera. And then of course, Megan Fox, as you know on our last podcast and all over the press. I guess you know, Megan Fox and Shane m kelly got together, uh after we shot the first part of our movie, and and and and that's been exciting. I guess you know. They're both friends of ours and they're so happy, and that's been something really positive that's come out.

00:31:37
Speaker 1: Of Uh, it's going to be a really good movie. Shortsy I've seen yeah you.

00:31:41
Speaker 4: Still yeah, Randall, You've you've produced hundreds of movies, over one hundred movies. You're like, you're you're you're a veteran. You've seen you've seen it, done almost everything. But going into this, did you have like a little trepidation.

00:31:54
Speaker 1: Oh my god, Shortzy, you should have a podcast. You're a great interviewer.

00:31:59
Speaker 4: No, I'm just I was just curious because I randall you, you know, like again, you're You're in the definition of a pro in the industry. You've done it all. But were you a little Was there a little piece of you that was nervous?

00:32:09
Speaker 2: Oh my god, oh Schwartz, I'll put it out there. I was petrified going into this experience. I mean, forget it. I mean you got to understand. When I walk on a set as a producer, it's like home for me. You know, It's like it's like I know, I know the ins and outs. There's nothing that could kind of shake me. But as a director going into this, I didn't know what to experience, and I was petrified. I kept it to myself. Obviously, Lala knew. I used to call her and be like, oh my god, I'm gonna be the biggest failure at this baby, and She's like, no, this is gonna.

00:32:39
Speaker 3: Be your I always knew you'd be great at it because you have a way with actors, and that's what a director is supposed to do, is why with actors.

00:32:46
Speaker 2: I've learned a lot. Listen, I've been very lucky. I've learned a lot over twenty three years with the greatest directors in the world and also some not so great directors, and I've taken as much as I can take. And I'll tell you, Schwartz, it really the night before we started filming, I was probably in a cold sweat, and I woke up that morning and I just I was so overly prepared, you know. I went to every location twenty times and walked it and blocked it with my cinematographer. But the day came when when it was day one to roll, and I just got on that set and just the magic, you know, happened. It's a cliche, but it just I just felt like I was where I was supposed to be. And even though I was the first week, I was learning a little bit, you know, it was kind of things, kind of finding my my rhythm. Yeh. But I tell you, the creative high that I have found through directing is second to none, and I'm just so blessed to have found this.

00:33:45
Speaker 1: At this at this I feel like we're on Shorty's podcast right now.

00:33:48
Speaker 2: I know, Shorts, you need to have a freaking podcast. Because you are good. How you flip this switch? How you flip this switch on us? When I was asking about your feelings a Vanner pop, I mean, damn, you're good. You're good, Switzerland.

00:34:02
Speaker 4: I'm excited for you, guys, La La you too. You got a movie coming out, don't you spree?

00:34:06
Speaker 1: I think, yeah, oh this podcast, well yes, I yeah, yes I do. It is now in theaters and on demand.

00:34:14
Speaker 4: I'm so proud of you, Like, I'm so proud of you because I moved here to be an actor. I love acting. I feel like I just love being on set. I love I love getting my makeup done. I love craft services. I love waking up at five a m. But here's the thing. I'm not a good actor.

00:34:30
Speaker 1: Oh my god, that's so bad.

00:34:34
Speaker 3: Is but it is like the experience of being on set that's pretty epic. I'm the happiest when I'm on set because it's different, schwartzy. You get to like read a script and then you disengage from it, where like when we do our show, you it's hard to not take it home with you.

00:34:49
Speaker 2: You know, I get it because when you guys, when you guys are in the thick of the drama, it's not scripted drama. It's your real life trauma. You used to Lala, You used to have a really and I mean, I don't know if people know this, but you used to have a really hard time in the beginning of our relationship. Used to come home, yeah, really really down and it was tough and it was hard.

00:35:07
Speaker 1: Are you Are you good at separating yourself?

00:35:09
Speaker 4: Shortzy, I'm okay. I tend to freeze up in the audition room, like, for instance, I just got my seg GOM status reinstated. I paid dues and I did a little me and Tom did a little bit, a little bit on Sherman Showcase and it felt so good to be back. But I got to say, you know, I was on set and we had dialogue and one of my first lines is, well, Sherman Showcases this really, really cool show created by Bashir Salahuden and Diella Riddle, and check it out anybody, if you haven't seen Sherman Showcase. That's really good. But god set, I it was it was my time to shine. And my first line was something along the lines of walking we walked in this bar, and my line was it's refined yet accessible. But I kept forgetting the word accessible and it is one of the worst feelings ever. Yeah. Yeah, have you ever just have you ever just bombed on set la la or froze up?

00:35:58
Speaker 3: Yeah?

00:35:59
Speaker 4: All the time.

00:36:00
Speaker 3: But you know what I've learned as I got older, like I did it more. I would like just be honest, like, yo, dude, I I don't even know what I'm doing or where I am right now, So like you guys need to give me five minutes.

00:36:12
Speaker 2: Yeah, we go back to the original question though both of you both went you just went on tyrants, both of tyraids, both of you. The question was I love you Tom? The question no what I was asking. And I have actually a more detailed question to the question that we skipped over, okay, which Tom is a professional? Tom, you should run for governor. And I'm serious, by the way, not even joking. I want to ask you, Tom, where Lala used to bring home the emotion of a tough scene on very Sadde. Tom, tell me a moment in eight years, one of the hardest scenes that affected you where you went home to Katie at home. I'm not talking not even with to do with you and Katie, but a scene in Vander pump a day.

00:36:58
Speaker 1: Why the camera shut down?

00:36:59
Speaker 4: You were you?

00:37:00
Speaker 2: And I'm still very upset. Do you remember something specific?

00:37:03
Speaker 4: That's a great question, and like that happens every single season, that happens. One that stands out would be when I had to confess to Katie that I had, you know, been unfaithful, that I had cheated on her, that had made out with some stranger. But like that was one of the most gut wrenching, awful and I had to do it twice.

00:37:21
Speaker 6: If you remember, I was kind of I went through kind of a well, I was kind of a make up select for a while there. And we were we were, we were going through we were we had a rocky relationship in the beginning, for sure, you know there was.

00:37:36
Speaker 2: And we when we all we understand, we've all been there and and honestly, but what what I'm that's amazing that you you know, it was codmit. But let me let me say this, so so it's got to be like life is hard already, and when you guys put yourself out there and you have to have one of these really tough scenes and go home, it can't just turn off, right, I Mean, it's got to that that's what That's what would be hardest for me.

00:38:02
Speaker 1: Is you have to take it home. However, many months later it airs.

00:38:07
Speaker 4: Then everyone gets to that's the thing. You have to relive it, and you have to leave reliving when it airs. Also on social media, you have to and you also have to feel the wrasp of everyone else who's watching. It's kind of an undergoing therapyons of people you know, and it's I have a.

00:38:22
Speaker 2: Question, I have a que I have a questions. Tell me to stop talking because I cut everybody off and cut everyone off exciting. I'm exciting.

00:38:32
Speaker 1: Okay, ask your ask your other question.

00:38:34
Speaker 2: Maybe I have another question. Thank. I just love talking. It's so fun because I never get to talk as let me talk. Ever, you're so good at it, both of you. Okay, Tom, I don't want you to run for governor. I want you to run for president. Tom. One other question, So, what is the biggest drama that you've ever had with one of the guys. And I know they're your best friend, Santavall and Jack's that's the biggest drama you ever had between the three of you, that that that you thought might not even be able to it was beyond repair.

00:39:08
Speaker 4: Do you remember it's I mean, I don't know if I don't know if you watched all episodes this last season, but everything that sort of has happened with Tom and Jack's throughout the wedding is probably been the worst, the worst, the little the worst, the worst trial of our little threesome, you know what I mean. We're We're the three amigos. Those are the people I met first in La Tom, then Jack's. You know, we lived together for two years before the show started, and we bonded on a very deep level. I love those guys, and to see them where they are now, barely talking or acknowledging each other's existence, it hurts. Once again. I feel like a child of divorce. I mean, you know Jack's Jacks has Tom, Tom and I tattooed on his arm, and uh, I'm optimistic that they'll be friends against some day. I just don't know if it'll ever be like it used to be. Something just feels different this time.

00:40:01
Speaker 2: And yeah, I I didn't even know that.

00:40:05
Speaker 1: Pretty gut wrenching.

00:40:07
Speaker 4: That's what I'm wrong.

00:40:08
Speaker 1: But I hope you're wrong too.

00:40:10
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm I'm late to the party as far as like your guys' friendship. But you know, we are a big dysfunctional family, and I like to believe that we can get over our dysfunctions sometimes and really just forgive and forget, like like a real family does.

00:40:27
Speaker 4: Yeah exactly, I know, I know we've really ran the garments together. Yeah, I'm surprised we're not more jaded and cynical.

00:40:37
Speaker 2: La la oh.

00:40:38
Speaker 1: I know we're all a bunch of nut jobs.

00:40:41
Speaker 4: Dude, I know, I know we're high functioning nut jobs.

00:40:44
Speaker 1: But we're high functioning nut jobs. I'm okay with that.

00:40:49
Speaker 2: I love that you guys own that I am not.

00:40:52
Speaker 3: Of course, Well, I think you have to have a screw loose to do reality TV, to be like, yeah, you can totally like see my whole life, right, you have a little bit wacky What did you say?

00:41:03
Speaker 4: Tom? But if you had to go back and tell your sixteen year old self that you would be on a successful reality show on Bravo TV, like I don't, I would. I wouldn't just not believe it. I would like if you would have told me that when I was sixteen, there's no way in hell you would find me doing reality TV.

00:41:20
Speaker 2: But here we are.

00:41:20
Speaker 3: Here, we are Jess, No, I would. I would have laughed at you because I would have been like, I'm going to win Oscars and.

00:41:28
Speaker 1: Crazy and here we are still.

00:41:32
Speaker 4: I still think you are Oh I do want Tom.

00:41:35
Speaker 1: I just want to keep you in my pocket. You guys are the best ever.

00:41:37
Speaker 2: I want to say one thing though, and to give you guys, and I always have given you guys this credit since the minute I got involved with Lava. It is you know, you guys are self deprecating, you make fun of yourselves. But the truth is to have a show one of the top three shows on a network for eight years going into your ninth, it is a huge accolade and I don't care reality non reality. To have a show that has lasted this long, you guys are doing something very special. So at the end of the day, take all the bullshit away. You are a success and you should always be proud of that.

00:42:12
Speaker 1: I agree. We're fucking badass, shortsy, Oh thank you.

00:42:15
Speaker 2: We do.

00:42:15
Speaker 4: We do completely put ourselves out there. I mean radical honesty. We I mean we don't hold anything back. I don't have any secrets left to be secrets, Like you know, we put everything out there. And yeah, I'm glad. I think people do appreciate. I get a lot of positive feedback and sometimes not so positive.

00:42:35
Speaker 1: I'm ready to say I've.

00:42:36
Speaker 4: Been a little, a little numb to social media lately.

00:42:39
Speaker 2: I haven't.

00:42:39
Speaker 4: I've lost that love and feeling. But it'll be back.

00:42:42
Speaker 1: It'll be back. We're in a weird time. It'll all come back and be normal.

00:42:46
Speaker 2: I think that because of the time we're in, I think all of us have had to pivot to what, you know, remember what's important in life. And I think as time comes back, social media will be that fun, light thing versus kind of what's really around us and what we're all having to deal with that.

00:43:02
Speaker 3: And the goal after things get back to normal is to get the friendship between Tom, Tom and I meaning you guys, you, Tom and Jacksie back on track.

00:43:13
Speaker 1: That's my new mission.

00:43:14
Speaker 2: Love.

00:43:14
Speaker 4: I've been doing I've been doing some some work, but it's gonna take a while.

00:43:18
Speaker 1: It's gonna take a while, but I believe in you.

00:43:20
Speaker 4: Shortzy you you, thank you.

00:43:22
Speaker 1: I have a way of bringing love.

00:43:25
Speaker 4: Thank you, guys, you're bothering me up. I appreciate it.

00:43:28
Speaker 3: We are really grateful that you woke up at this hour on a Sunday to do this podcast.

00:43:33
Speaker 2: Yes, we're very grateful Tom, thank you buddy for doing this. And we love you. We love all everybody you know, the whole cast.

00:43:40
Speaker 1: Tell Katie I love her so much.

00:43:42
Speaker 4: I will I will pickleball sooner and a nickelball.

00:43:46
Speaker 1: Yes, all right, Shortzy, We'll see you soon.

00:43:49
Speaker 4: Bye bye bye you guys, Love you