Top 10 BobbyCast Episodes of the Year (Part 1)

00:00:02
Speaker 1: Ladies and gentlemen. We are experiencing technical difficulties. This is the Bobby Cast.

00:00:21
Speaker 2: Well, if we have reached the end of the year, so that means it's time to go through the best episodes. Stuff you may have miss, stuff that I think you'll like. It's the top ten Bobby Casts of the year. These were either the most downloaded episodes or they had the most interaction on social media from you guys. I was able to sit down with some really cool people. Are conversations a lot of times are raw and real, also a lot of laughs, some very vulnerable moments as well. And let's kick it off now at number ten Don Felder, formerly of the Eagles, which was pretty crazy to sit down with one of the guys that was one of the Eagles and wrote Hotel California, and he talked about that, and he also talked about high wrote some of the other hits. So at first, let's go Don Felder from so four to seventy one. He comes in at number ten.

00:01:04
Speaker 3: I met this guy named Stephen Stills who had left somewhere in Florida there was a military academy like a military school high school. Who had run away from high school. And this is way before he was Steven Stills, Like you just met. That's just as a civilian, regular guy you meet Steven Stills.

00:01:22
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay.

00:01:23
Speaker 3: He and I and Tom Petty and Bernie Ledden all went to the same high school. So when we were before we got to high school, he was in Gainesville and he played in this band with me called the Continentals, which a continental That thing was like really cool, you know. So anyway, so we started playing, but teen time dances, we wouldn't have really didn't get paid.

00:01:47
Speaker 4: It was just for the fun.

00:01:47
Speaker 3: Of being on the stage in a pa and playing and having a good time. But I think the first time we got played Steven paid. Stephen and I got in a car and my mom drove us to this little women's organization tea party where they have those little finger sandwiches and drink tea and stuff, and Steve and I would just play acoustic guitar for these women. I think we got ten dollars or something. We made five bucks apiece, you know, And from there it really wasn't ever about the money, to tell you the truth. It was just the love of playing and figuring out music and how does this work, and how do you write songs? And how do you know? I would get Mill Bay guitar books and learn chords from El Bay and just kind of self educated all the way along.

00:02:29
Speaker 2: At what point, because you're talking about three absolute hall of famers, not even just like traditional sense rock and roll hall of fame, but like the greatest ever do anything musically with Steven Stills and Tom Petty and yourself. Do you guys all know you want to do it solo? Why'd you break up the band? Like that? Feels like a pretty solid band on.

00:02:51
Speaker 3: Well, Steven left as soon as he graduated from high school. He was one year ahead of me. He left and moved to California, and I didn't see him until quite a few years later. I think he graduated in sixty four. Was it to do music though?

00:03:05
Speaker 4: When he left?

00:03:06
Speaker 2: Was he like, I'm gonna go do music or was he just moving to California to see what happened?

00:03:09
Speaker 3: He knew that was his destiny. He got out to California. It wasn't happening in the Southeast, it wasn't happening in New York. It was happening in California. So he was magnificently drawn out to California. And the next time I heard him was I was laying in bed one night and the radio was on and I heard For what It's Worth and I went, God, that voice sounds really FAMI, I know who is that? And they said it was Buffalo Springfield. And I went and figured out who Buffalo Springfield was. Was released Stephen? And then the next time I actually saw him physically, he was on stage at Woodstock and I was in the crowd and I went, that's Stephen. Still, what'stock?

00:03:52
Speaker 2: So you were there watching, Yeah, and you see your friend on stage nineteen sixty nine?

00:03:56
Speaker 4: What'stock?

00:03:57
Speaker 1: That's right? That's crazy?

00:03:58
Speaker 4: Was Whatstock for you as a fan?

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Speaker 2: Was it like wild and muddy and everything that we see or did you get the good version of it?

00:04:06
Speaker 3: I had enough fourth site to actually have gone to Woodstock with a guy who owned what it's called now a travel all. It's like the predecessor to a suburban. It had box doors on the back that open, so we put a mattress in the back because it's out just in the middle of nowhere, right, and we brought an ice chest with drinks and food and we were got there a day early, and we backed in so we could open those doors towards the stage even if it was pouring rain. We had shelter, we would trying a comfy place to sleeve food with it. And then it was just great because I saw some of the most important, I think influential musicians in the history of rock. I saw Jimmy Hendricks, I saw Carlos Santana, saw Crosby Stills, Nash and young Grateful Dad just on an on Jana's job for three solid days. It was probably the best music event that ever exploded on the planet. It just resonated all over the world. And as a matter of fact, I wrote a song about it on my last record about how that event went on to influence decades after decades, after decades of young people that love rock and roll and wanted to learn to play like that little ten year old in Texas and became famous decade after decade after decade. Is called American rock and Roll. That's the title of my last album, And that song is about being at Woodstock and seeing the beginning of it.

00:05:32
Speaker 2: When you were at Woodstock and you're watching these great artists and you're inspired, but you were in the midst of the early part of your music career at the same time. Did you have a healthy professional jealousy or would you have been like me about, like I should.

00:05:44
Speaker 3: Be up there, this sucks. I would say both. It was dependent on how much I was smoking at the time. If I was spoking, I was pretty mellow about it.

00:05:54
Speaker 2: See, I think I would have been completely jealous the whole time. But that's really cool that, like, you turn to be really one of America's great musicians, but you were also there as a fan, probably at what was our greatest music event. Yeah, because you have that perspective of being a fan and watching it as well.

00:06:13
Speaker 4: Yeah.

00:06:13
Speaker 2: Man, I just think about how muddy it was, and he was in a freaking suburban. He was covered like he was a d Yeah.

00:06:19
Speaker 1: Don so.

00:06:21
Speaker 5: You know, I always hear about the California sound. Back then, you talked about that a little bit, and everyone was going to California to make music. But in the sixties, you know, you think about California's Beach Boys. The Beach Boys had the California sound. In the seventies, you guys had the California sound. Did you ever think about that.

00:06:38
Speaker 3: Well, yeah, because there was nobody except for Bernie Leaden that was in the Eagles, that was from California. Don Hinley was from Texas. I was from Florida. Joe Walsh later joined. I think he was from Detroit, or so Glenn was from Detroit. There was nobody in the band that had the California sound, but we somehow managed to be given the title of the new California Sound in the seventies.

00:07:03
Speaker 4: Yeah, and you embraced it.

00:07:04
Speaker 2: You felt like, even though you know, not really a band full of Californians, like, would you guys California sound?

00:07:14
Speaker 3: Well, we were making music in California, you know. So I do have to say that when the band first, even before I joined at Bernie Leden was a brilliantly gifted country musician. He played unbelievable flat top guitar, the best, one of the best five string banjo players I've ever seen in my life. He played pedal steel, he played mandolin. He was just he loved country music. You listen to those first couple of early records, that's a really heavy influence coming from Bernie and all of those tracks. Right, So there was the birth of what I thought was early country rock music in those tracks. Later when I joined the band, everybody wanted to move except for Bernie. Wanted to move from country rock to more midstream AM rock and roll radio, and so that's why I was brought in. They kind of put a harder ridge on everything that led it out of country.

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Speaker 4: How was it joining a group that was already a group? What's that dynamic like?

00:08:17
Speaker 3: Well, it was interesting because Bernie and I had been friends since high school. We had Bernie replaced Steven Stills in the Money Quintet when Steve took off, and so I'd known him for a long time and he had given me insights into the dynamics in that band in quite extensive ways about it always felt like a band that was about to break up. So I had no idea how long If I joined this band two weeks from now, somebody's going to quit and take off. And Bernie eventually did quit during the one of These Nights records.

00:08:49
Speaker 2: So do you feel like that helped the creative process or at least made it a like a quirky creative process that there was always some sort of tension, like was that were you challenging each other creatively because there was tension or was it just like it's.

00:09:06
Speaker 4: Kind of it's just tough.

00:09:08
Speaker 3: I think both. I think there were egos involved. I think there were song choices involved. I think there was a battle for who was going to be the front man, which was really a Glenn Fry originally started being the front man from the get go. All the songs on the first record were Glenn Fry songs, big hits, and then Don Hinley just kind of roared out of the background now off the drums, into singing spectacular songs like WHICHI Woman and Best of My Love and just great, great songs. His voice was spectacular. So there was always that struggle between those two guys, even though they were writing and collaborating together. I was there not to create friction, but to help divert whatever their goal was musically directly, because Don Hiley doesn't write music and Glenn he used to call himself the claw when he played piano and it was like he could get through it, but he really wasn't a pianist. And so between Bernie's influence and earlier on and then when he finally left and he left for what I thought was a really good reason, to tell you the truth, he really wanted to retain the roots of country in some part of these records, and they were just where over country, we're going to move into rock and pop and all this other stuff. And when Bernie left, they chose to get Joe in which I love Joe to death. I think he and I had some of the best times together of any time on the road. And not only that, but the fun we had already been playing together and TV shows and shows that we opened for Elton John at Dodger Stadium as Joe Walsh and friends, and so he and I had already been doing that stuff. So when that idea for Hotel California came up Little Beach House, I said, I had to make an ending on this that Joe and I could play on so that we could have So I played a solo kind of like what I was going to play, and then I'd play something I thought Joe would try to sound like Joe, and I was like simulating that thing at the very end of the record. It was just always so much fun to work and play with him, and we inspired each other. It was like, Okay, you think you can do this, try this. You know and okay, Trump, let's put a squeak on this one, and you know, just try to That was a very loving, fun creative process. A lot of times it was over lyrics, and Don Helly is a brilliant lyricist in my opinion. He just you take a song like Hotel, and each little line is like a postcard. It's like a picture of the song on a dark desert highway. You see it cool in my hair. You can feel it in your hair, the warm smell you can smell khalid As. He just has a way to draw these little pictures that to a great chorus.

00:12:01
Speaker 4: Brilliant.

00:12:02
Speaker 3: He's an English literature major and it shows in this writing. So I have the utmost respect for Don and his skills that way.

00:12:09
Speaker 4: His voice.

00:12:10
Speaker 3: I used to say he could sing the New York Times telephone book and I'd love it.

00:12:16
Speaker 4: I'll buy it platinum, you know.

00:12:19
Speaker 2: At number nine, it's stone cold. Steve Austin from episode four seventy two probably one of my favorite interviews because we just went to his ranch and then we talked for an hour. We talked about his career, what he does for fun, and you can always go back and listen to the full episode as well. Now he loves to cuss. We did not bleep any of it. Heads up. Here's a clip we put this at number nine. It's stone called Steve Boston.

00:12:44
Speaker 6: We used to One of the guys I used to travel with is one of my closest friends, Diamond Dallas Page. He was ahead of his time as far as taking care of his body, and he videotaped all his matches and I'd be over doing color commentary, you know, while who's in the ring working and the Sure enough we get to say shit box motel and we'd hook the VCR thing up to the TV so we could watch his match and say, man, no, don't do this right here? Do this then? Or do it like this? So we start critiquing all of his matches, so the same thing. Man, it's reps in anything, just like with racing east side by side, just reps. You got to do anything or whatever whatever it is you're trying to do, You got to do it over and over and over again to make improvements.

00:13:27
Speaker 2: And you know that are you feeling Are you feeling fulfilled in your competitive spirit by racing now from what you were getting from football and then professional wrestling, like, is it the same feeling of fulfillment?

00:13:40
Speaker 6: I would compare it more to to football rather than wrestling, just because in wrestling you're in front of such massive crowds, which meant I've been in front of crowds of twenty five people, you know, and shit hurts a lot more with it. Ain't nobody there high drilling, ain't near his eye. Just gave me a good swift kick in the ass before I hit the damn door and make my entrance. Many a drilline factor is a whole different thing, because man, when that glass broke, when they wrote that music for me, they couldn't have wrote a better piece of music for Stonecold Steve Boston. When that glass breaks, you could be dragged out for being on the road. Who we used to live on the road like all that, A lot of the artists you talk to. It's a way of life, and shit happens, and sometimes you're down, and when that glass breaks and that crowd goes through the roof, it's an adrenalinst spike that may if you've never felt it, There's no way I could put it into words to explain it to you enough. But this racing thing is more like football because of just I just want to compete at something and I want to win, and god damn it, I ain't gonna win all the time. The hell I broke down. We had a race a couple of weeks ago. It was a five hundred and fifty five mile race, and I broke down at mile mark or one hundred and had to pull out.

00:14:56
Speaker 4: Of the race.

00:14:57
Speaker 6: And that sucked ass because I was on about a force for race winning streak and my federation that I run in, and so it's nice when you experience those highs and you know, it's like anybody can learn how to win. It's those losses that kicking ass and kind of ground you and say, Okay, the lows come with the highs, and the highs go with the lows. So racing is it? Really? It gives me a lot of satisfaction, a lot of fulfillment. And I never knew this, but last year when I started racing, we're running basically on just rough ass, you know, roads out here in the desert, on a two track road and we'd be going straight down the road and there's rocks and turns and it's referen hell out there and hell, I just veer off the fucking road and end up in the sage brush. Well, my coal driver's been racing this whole life, and he's calm, cool and collected, and I'd gather my shit back together and get on the road and say, hey, man, sorry about that. We're wired for sounds, so we can talk to each other. And what had happened was I was thinking, Hey man, what the fuck? What am I drinking tonight? I'm gonna have a beer? Am I gonna drink whiskey or whatever? As soon as my mind left the task at hand, which is navigating, you know, through that desert. And it happened about three or four times that first season, and racing has taught me to be laser focused, because as soon as you take your mind off what you're doing, you will fuck up. And that that's one of the things I enjoy about it as well, Like the world can be in a pile of shit right now, but if I'm in that race, bug in a race, it can wait because I'm dealing with what I got to deal with and trying to get across that finish line before the other guys.

00:16:32
Speaker 4: Do you have a drink wine?

00:16:33
Speaker 7: Oh?

00:16:34
Speaker 6: Yeah? I love wine.

00:16:34
Speaker 2: Are people will like, why are you drinking wine? Your stone cold Steve Bosta, you should only drink beer.

00:16:40
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, I'm a well rounded drinker.

00:16:43
Speaker 4: I would just be like answer, shardon a.

00:16:45
Speaker 2: Are you sure, mister Austin, I've.

00:16:48
Speaker 6: Been around for so long. Now I'll make a post on instagrams, Oh man, you better wantch you live. He you've been drinking like motherfucker. I take care of myself. I ran hard when I was in the wrestling game. I ran hard and I ran fast. It's just the way I lived. I won't speak about anybody else, but you know, uh yeah, I love wine. I love my beer. I've been in a beer business with Elsie gun No brun coming He since twenty fifteen, and I love a good bourbon.

00:17:15
Speaker 2: Yeah, I just fire a waiter.

00:17:16
Speaker 4: Are you sure they bring them a beer? Anyway?

00:17:19
Speaker 2: Look at it.

00:17:20
Speaker 6: Whine is good, man, Wine is good after a race when you had a couple of beers and this is that that that final drink for you hit.

00:17:27
Speaker 4: The hey Zema with a job.

00:17:32
Speaker 6: That was the thing when it first came out. Oh yeah, well they're still around.

00:17:37
Speaker 8: I don't know, I.

00:17:39
Speaker 4: Hope not.

00:17:41
Speaker 5: I'm just kidding you were you were in a few movies with Adam Sandler? What was What was he like?

00:17:46
Speaker 6: I always tell people that's the nicest guy I ever met in Hollywood. And I didn't do Hollywood. I lived in uh, you know, in uh Marina del Rey, in the Venice area, So I didn't go to parties. I didn't go to the Hollywood Hills. I didn't do none of that shit. I just wasn't my scene. I was an athlete. We were talking early before we started rolling cameras, and we start talking about the artistry of some of the guys that you've interviewed. But man, those actors are a little different, you know. I don't mean it a bad way. I just mean they're different than an athlete. They're wired different and or I'm wired differently than they are. Adam Sandler was the funniest, nicest guy I've ever worked with, and I've enjoyed each time I've gotten to work with him. He's a super guy, a sweetheart.

00:18:29
Speaker 2: I'm not gonna mention any names. I don't expect you to either, But there are times in my career profession I have to work with people I don't enjoy working with It's just part of what we do. But you gotta fake it, you know. I feel, especially if it's like a boss will be like, I need you to have this person on the show. It doesn't often do that, but I'm like, I don't really like them, but I'm gonna bring them in. I'm gonna work with them. We're gonna make it work for me. That's difficult, but I can fake it. What is it like having to be do a job so intimate and you just don't like the person you're working with and you're wrestling with them.

00:19:00
Speaker 6: Those were so few and far between. I always got along with pretty much everybody, and I and I and you could go talk to anybody that's ever worked with me and maybe they might have a different opinion. But I've seen some guys that that were outstanding workers, but they were kind of at odds with each other, and when they got in the ring, it didn't click because there were some animosity. But I was. I meant, for some reason, I've always gotten along with just about it, damn near everybody I've ever worked with. Now there's some guys whose style is so different and that you knew was going to be a difficult task.

00:19:35
Speaker 1: Mean you still liked them as humans?

00:19:37
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, they were stylistically so different.

00:19:40
Speaker 6: Yeah, but yeah, and there was there was. There was very few people that I disliked.

00:19:45
Speaker 2: Who in your career. And I tell you why I asked this. I remember, and if I'm wrong on the facts, please correct me. I remember w CW you were still Stunning Steve. And when I was really young, I loved Ricky the Dragon steam modes awesome. I here he was a really great guy too, never never met him, and he was maybe the US champion. He had the belt, but he his backer, I don't know if it was real or not. And he had to give you the belt and and and so he was like, I can't wrestle, So you got the belts as Stunning Steve. And I remember thinking, man, that would be so cool to be in the ring with Ricky the Dragon Steamboat. Aside from whatever the storyline there was then, who were those guys? And one could have been Ricky Steamboat? Who are those guys? When you came up and the first time you got to actually professionally be a peer that you were like, this is freaking awesome.

00:20:31
Speaker 6: Well, I was wrestling with Ricky the Dragon Steamboat and I think I was in the turnbuckle. He was on the second rope and he was punching me and I pushed him off and he landed on his back. I believe that's that That was one. That was how he got one of his bad back injuries. And Ricky the Dragon Steamboat was awesome, probably one of the best ever for sure. Uh what was.

00:20:54
Speaker 2: The question, like, who did you get to work with me? Like this is you were young, but you're like, this is sick. I get to be in the ring with this person.

00:20:59
Speaker 6: I looked up, well, Rick Flair because people kind of saw me as maybe being the next Rick Flair because I was modeling this four I had my neck injury down to WCW. You know, I was kind of modeling my style after Rick because to me, he had the ultimate pro wrestling style. And I'll never forget. We were at a TV tape and down there South Carolina or somewhere like that, and it was me, Rick and somebody against three other guys, and I'm thinking, man, I'm gonna show this motherfucker what's up. And all of a sudden Rick tags in and I see him go to work. Of course, I'm a lifelong fan. And when you're standing on an apron and you're watching a guy, and that was at eighteen by eighteen ring in WCW, but all of a sudden, when you're watching the man do his thing, you're like, fuck this, I got a long way to go. But it was awesome to be in a ring with him because it was like a head's up called like, okay man, this is kind of you need to step up your game a whole lot more than you thought you did. And I would never say that I ever reached Rick Flair status in the ring at all, because I consider him the goat. But we're working with a guy like that, Hey Morgan, with Ravishing, Rick Rude. But working with any of those guys that had any names was always fun to me. But also, yeah, I really didn't look at it like that way. After a few years in the business, or even after a few months in the business, you're just saying, okay, man, these guys are just just like me. It might be more well known, but there's really it's not a big deal.

00:22:29
Speaker 1: Hang tight. The Bobby Cast will be right back.

00:22:36
Speaker 9: Wow, and we're back on the Bobby Cast.

00:22:40
Speaker 2: We have Sarah Evans at number eight. Super successful career, super public life, but in the midst of it, she was dealing with some really difficult things and she talked about that. Here's Sarah Evans, we have her at number eight. It's from episode four forty two.

00:22:55
Speaker 7: My life has been on display since I got my record deal with our at twenty four and I went through a very public divorce after having three small children. My baby wasn't even a year old when I filed for divorce. I was on Dancing with the Stars during that time. So my life has always been a very open book and in some ways, but then in some ways I've been able to maintain some privacy. A lot of that is because we raised the kids in Birmingham, Alabama, in Mountain Brook, which is a close to Birmingham. So I divorced my first husband. That was so public. There were so many lies told and just you know how it goes, I mean, rumors and people think they know. And so then I Mary Jay. We had a really really fast courtship. You know, we fell head over hills, madly in love, so much passion, so much you know, love for each other and just you're my best friend, You're my person, and I just couldn't believe that I that that had happened to me because I also spent my childhood from age twelve on chasing after my father because he was a great person but a terrible divorced dad. And so I definitely have you know, quote daddy issues, and so I'm always thinking wrongly about what love is and what I deserve. Also being one of seven kids and being the one who made it when all my siblings are musically talented, they're great. I've always had a sense of guilt that I carry for why did I get rich? Why did I get famous? Why did I and not my siblings? But at the same time, I'm the one who worked my ass for it?

00:24:45
Speaker 4: Right yeah? Yeah?

00:24:46
Speaker 10: Left home me. That's what WARNI flies about.

00:24:48
Speaker 7: That song is about me leaving home and loving my home but knowing that I've got to leave my family come here and do this. And one brother that came with me and he became just as successful as a musician. So so there's all that going on in my head. I meet Jay and he is so attentive, he's so you know, buying me gifts all the time, and and like I said, our courtship was very fast.

00:25:13
Speaker 10: We our first date was October.

00:25:15
Speaker 7: Third, and we were married in June of that same year of two thousand and eight. So there's a song on the album called Mask where I talk about you know, you weren't him, meaning you weren't my ex husband. So that's what drew me because you were the opposite of that. What happened is Jay he has his own set of issues like we all do, you know, psychologically, And so I grew up very old fashioned, like I said, on a farm in Missouri, where you know, women are submissive to their husbands, women do all the you know, in domestic where although my mother worked out on the farm as well, on a tractor all the time. But my granny, for instance, who was my idol, was just do over my papa and all of us. And so that's what I grew up thinking. You know, you've got to be this way. And I also enjoy that because it's a good juxtaposition of being famous and then.

00:26:13
Speaker 4: Like now you enjoy it because it's so crazy on one side that you need that balance. Yeah, then your only model was that, It sounds like growing up that was the only model you knew that.

00:26:24
Speaker 10: Was the only model I knew.

00:26:25
Speaker 7: Yes, and on the road, if I wanted my tour manager to find me a brown and white spotted cow and sit it in front of the bus just so I can look at it all day before my show, like, he would have to do that.

00:26:37
Speaker 4: A live one.

00:26:38
Speaker 10: A live one, yeah, for sure, I wouldn't want to be dead.

00:26:41
Speaker 4: But no, like a plastic one. When I meant not a dead one.

00:26:44
Speaker 10: A real one.

00:26:45
Speaker 4: I got a real cow.

00:26:46
Speaker 7: Yeah, I mean whatever I wanted. If if I wanted it to be plastic, he would have to do that. Because I have a team, and so at home I like to be like Hannah Montana. I'm handed Montana here, but at home, I'm just Sarah and mom and wife. And I think I have always felt the need to really make up for, you know, being.

00:27:10
Speaker 10: H being doted on the way I'm doted on.

00:27:13
Speaker 9: Hank Tight. The Bobby Cast will be right back and we're back on the Bobby Cast.

00:27:27
Speaker 4: Do you feel guilty that you're so celebrated outwardly everywhere people that don't really know you. They know a little bit about you, but you know, you play a show. It's happy for me. It was a struggle i'd play a theater do stand up. I'll be like, I'm I'll go back to my room by myself, and I'll be like, well, I'm by myself. And this kind of sucks now, but now at all. I got married two years ago now, but now I have a wife, and like, I come home and I got a freaking load the dishwasher and I hate it. But at the same time, it actually makes me value what's important, like the real Yeah, it's like drags me back to the real things and helped me evaluate life.

00:28:01
Speaker 10: A little more exactly.

00:28:03
Speaker 4: So you're you're dealing.

00:28:04
Speaker 7: With that, yes, thinking, And you know Jay struggled with so you know, he played football Alabama. He was the quarterback, won the National Championship in ninety two, went on to play in the NFL, played for the CFL. He's been concussed severely.

00:28:23
Speaker 4: Seven times that he knows about.

00:28:25
Speaker 10: That he knows about twice where he was.

00:28:29
Speaker 4: Be careful in that ches there twice.

00:28:32
Speaker 10: Where he was unconscious. So and then he.

00:28:39
Speaker 7: In the same way that I have father issues, he also has mother issues. And his father passed away when he was very young. When he was in the Columbine actually for the NFL. His dad died of a heart attack. His dad was his best friend, his like kind of protector against everybody who wanted to get at him for being the national championship quarterback at Alabama, which was like Elvis down there. So when he met me and realized that I was super submissive and you know, total family woman and that the career was just my job, but I didn't let it go to my head and all that, he just you know, would brag on me and like, you're the best mom I've ever met. I can't even believe what a great mom you are. Your children are fabulous, You're such a great person.

00:29:25
Speaker 10: You're the best singer in the world.

00:29:27
Speaker 7: Like just so you know, all all things that are true, by the way, but he treated me like a queen. And then and he had also never drank until he was in his mid thirties, because when we were dating, I was like, really, you've never drank. And I'm not a big drinker, like my kids have never seen me drunk. But I was like, well, what do you do at the beach, Like that's weird and not go.

00:29:55
Speaker 4: I've never had a drink. That's why I hate the beach.

00:29:56
Speaker 7: You've never had a drink. You've never drank No, Okay, that's how Jay was when we met.

00:30:01
Speaker 4: And I hate the beach because what do I do with the beach? Right, Yeah, maybe that's why I hate the beach because I always like so much a light. Yeah, I was like, no, I've never had a drink of alcohol because I come out come from drug abuse and alcohol abuse, and I don't understand the beach. That makes sense for the first time ever. Yeah, that's what you're supposed to do. Yeah, drink.

00:30:18
Speaker 10: We've made so many like.

00:30:20
Speaker 4: Yeah, I know we're we're best friends and we're best frien Yeah.

00:30:23
Speaker 10: Yeah they are. So I probably won't sue you now, but anyway.

00:30:27
Speaker 4: I'm still going to sue you for the chair though. Anyway, go ahead, and yeah, I continue on.

00:30:31
Speaker 7: So, then he tried alcohol, and alcohol was you know, it isn't good for him. It does run in his family mother's side, but he never experienced because his grandfather passed away when Jay was really young, so he didn't ever see that side of of his mom's dad being abusive and being an alcoholic. So I think that and Jay also has add really bad. Like I said, he's been concussed so many times, so he I always say that he's an amazing man who made some really really bad decisions. So after a little while into our marriage, abuse came into our marriage, and I didn't want to put my kids through another divorce.

00:31:29
Speaker 10: I was so in love with Jay, and.

00:31:33
Speaker 7: It takes a long time before you realize what's going on, like am.

00:31:39
Speaker 10: I being abused? Or was that was that verbal abuse?

00:31:43
Speaker 7: Or you know, you kind of but at the same time, you know, you just kind of want to hope that it changes. Or then I began what they call like managing his behavior, trying never to be you know, too big for him, like as far as because I have a big personality, and so I noticed a lot of things about myself were changing to suit him and to make sure that he was always happy with me.

00:32:13
Speaker 4: I mean, it sounds a bit like you're falling into a codependency place just so yes, you two could function in your mind in the most healthy way.

00:32:21
Speaker 10: That is exactly right.

00:32:22
Speaker 7: I'm very codependent, and part of it is having six siblings. So I've I've never been alone. I've never you know, I don't think I've ever went through a time in my life where I was sleeping alone or living alone because it was either always a sibling or a spouse and so and I got married very young the first time.

00:32:42
Speaker 10: Anyway.

00:32:43
Speaker 7: Uh So, once you really do realize, then the process for me was I started reading everything about anything I could get my hands on, like, you know, what does this mean when this happens? And that really started getting my mind going into you know, this is bad, like what we're dealing with is bad. But it never ever happened in front of anybody. The kids didn't know. He never even so much as looked sideways at them, raised his voice to them. He is an amazing father, and he's an amazing husband, an amazing person. But alcohol, I just don't think goes well with his chemistry, makeup or whatever.

00:33:32
Speaker 2: At number seven Terry Clark. Now, this is episode four thirty seven. Terry's really cool. One of my favorite nineties country artists. We talked about over twenty years of music that you know, she's been making it and she'd drive from Canada to Nashville. She did that a bunch. Took her eight years to land a record deal. How her mom influenced her career. Terry Clark here at number seven on the best Bobby Cast of the year.

00:33:56
Speaker 4: Why do you think you were so passionate about it? Who were you trying to.

00:34:02
Speaker 8: It?

00:34:02
Speaker 4: Maybe impress isn't the word. Who were you trying to make proud? Was it yourself? Was it somebody back home? Like? Who was it for you? Question?

00:34:09
Speaker 8: Nobody's ever asked me that.

00:34:13
Speaker 4: Because that hunger just doesn't come out at that ear right.

00:34:15
Speaker 8: It doesn't. I moved around a lot as a kid, and I had i'd say, a challenging relationship with my stepfather, not a super close relationship with my biological father. I mean, we're fine in everything, but I had some I had some tougher times growing up, and I think music was that one thing that anchored me in a way and gave me that security and that confidence that I didn't have anywhere else. And I became so obsessed with it, and there was also a burning desire I'll show you thing.

00:34:56
Speaker 4: Yeah, no, I don't know my real dad. I met him once, if you years ago, So I definitely understand that because that was a driver for me too. It was like, wait, I'll show you why you really missed out on not being my dad like that. That was a part of it for me too.

00:35:12
Speaker 8: I think a lot of us have something driving us other than just a love for what we do, that that that sparks that that starts that fire.

00:35:21
Speaker 4: Yeah, I would agree. The consistency that you know you said music was just there, you know, whenever you have a really inconsistent life childhood like I did, like you did, when you do have that one or two thing like my grandma was so consistent with me when she was with My grandma adopted me for a while too, when you know my mom was gone and or my dad was. But anything that had consistency, like I still hold on to, Like I'm the biggest Arkansas Razorback sports fan, but it's because I knew every Saturday, it didn't matter where I was living, there was going to be a game and I could look forward to it. It's going to be on for it's on free television. So that was consistent for me. There was music that was consistent for me because my life wasn't hot. There was no consistency about it at all, and so that why it's why today I still like hold a hond to those things. It's even like the people were talking about Innerygod that we felt like we're famous when we were kids while we still Yeah, I feel like it's so cool.

00:36:20
Speaker 8: There's a comfort in the consistency of something like that. And I said earlier in another situation something that really kind of struck me, because you know, your career ebbs and flows, and you have ups and downs, and you have self doubt, and even with success comes that, well, I'm not I'm not the top of everybody's mind anymore, and you have to you know, with that comes a little of that, you know, and you have to kind of navigate that emotionally, and it's not as easy as people would think it is. But you know, and I think a lot of artists go through that, this period of do I matter enough to keep doing this anymore?

00:37:02
Speaker 4: Oh? First, I doing relevancy issues.

00:37:04
Speaker 8: Relevancy, Yes, we can have a whole therapy.

00:37:08
Speaker 4: I live in relevancy landwork. It's like me too, I'm not relevant anymore. This is totally How do you deal with that?

00:37:15
Speaker 8: I'll tell you how I deal with that. This year, it kind of it was. It was an epiphany that came to me and I started thinking back, and I started going way back and remembering that hunger, that kid, that woke up to watch This Week in Country Music and sat for hours and hours in her bedroom, singing and learning new songs, dreaming about Nashville, crying because she wanted to just be in Nashville, just wanted a shot, wanted to be on the radio so bad I could taste it, And I'm like, I can't give up on that kid. I would feel like I was betraying her if I just did that.

00:37:52
Speaker 4: What's wild about you saying this? Is that me ten thousand feet up looking at you and your career. I would see you and go, man, everybody loves her massive success. You would just think, but I think this is common right around the room with whomever. I would just think, that's the one person that doesn't deal with imposter syndrome or relevancy. And but it just shows you it almost doesn't matter. It's like the screw loose that got us here is still the screw loose now that affects us in a slightly different way. And I think the.

00:38:32
Speaker 8: Danger zone to that is playing the comparison.

00:38:36
Speaker 4: Game too big time, because you can never win.

00:38:37
Speaker 8: Because relevancy is only relevant compared to who's doing something more like and there's always going to be somebody doing something or getting more opportunities than you're getting, or or being recognized more than you are. And you know, sometimes you feel like you're spending your reels because you're working your ass off, and you're just like, does anybody care?

00:38:56
Speaker 4: Right? Does anybody care at all? Will they ever care? Again?

00:39:00
Speaker 8: And then if you if you express that to somebody, they're like, they don't understand, sin, how could you?

00:39:04
Speaker 11: Yeah?

00:39:05
Speaker 8: Yeah, it's just yeah, it's part of being human, and it's that affliction, well, the human affliction.

00:39:10
Speaker 4: And even as that creative, it's you know, if I have friends at work and most of my friends aren't creatives, which I think is a big deal. It's good for me because they can kind of give me a bit of a realistic view on what's really important in life. And you know, with those I can't really go, well, here's the thing, here's why I'm I'm upset. You know this show, the stand up show I did you know? I did. I did announce the tour twelve shows and it only sold eighty percent, And They're like, are you how is that upsetting to you? And I'm like, we don't understand. Like last time, I sold every theater and now I'm sorry, and so at the same as trivial as it is, you'd still like to have someone that can relate to it and go, I get it same but instead of just but yeah, you know, because a lot of my friends are on the industry, like why are you whining? Your theaters are almost sold? And it's like nobody don't understand. Like I do a big time with imposters, but when I do. I finally have a couple of friends too now in the industry. One of my closest friends and is a guy named Ben Rector. Who do you know? Ben Is?

00:40:18
Speaker 10: Can I tell him this.

00:40:19
Speaker 4: Is he doing? Is he doing your project? Yeah, he'll be over in like thirty minutes, and.

00:40:23
Speaker 8: Like, but we can't really get into a project too much.

00:40:26
Speaker 4: But I know I can't.

00:40:27
Speaker 1: I don't know him, it's.

00:40:29
Speaker 4: All Ben is one of my best friends. We work out here at the house three times a week, but is absolutely and I think I get anxious. We have like an anxious three. We could be like a wrestling me Brett Eldridge and Ben Rector.

00:40:51
Speaker 8: I get I can see you all being exactly.

00:40:53
Speaker 4: Yeah, we just called if it's on like ticket a release day or something. It's like, you're doing all right, man, I don't know and I'm watching it's they go on someone in six minutes, don't watch, don't watch the live, just check back in at night. Don't worry about it. But we all have to have those friends that could rely. They can relate. It's really important, yes, and it's also important to have friends it can't relate at all, and there's got to be about like that has to be my wife, not in the business. That is what to me helped the Hey, am I still relevant because she just doesn't care in the best way. And it drives me crazy sometimes too, because I'm like, don't you care? If she's like, I know you care, So I care, But that's not that important. Like you're doing what you love. It's gonna be sometimes, gonna be great. Sometimes it's not going to be great. You're just gonna keep going. And so that's very valuable too. Who is that for you?

00:41:44
Speaker 8: Oh gosh? I have Okay, So I have friends that I have had my entire life since.

00:41:50
Speaker 4: I was twelve from home.

00:41:51
Speaker 8: Yeah, from home, and we're still very very close. And then I have a few friends that I made in Nashville right after I moved here, like in nineteen ninety, who are also my other very best friends. None of them are in the business.

00:42:03
Speaker 4: The Originals too, Originals.

00:42:04
Speaker 8: I went to school with them. They are they have businesses, they're school teachers, they're social workers. It's very important. And then and then I have the Pamtilist and Susie Bogus, Perio, Riba and Tricia. Let we all get together and we can we can kind of bounce these insecurities off of each other, and we more so me, I think. But I look to them especially like Uhriba and and and Susie, I would say, because I look to them like big sisters who have been through it all. And it doesn't matter how big the star is. Everybody has had their moments I think where they've experienced something that they can go, hey, you know, and I can go, what did you do in this instance? Or like like, you've got to have some of that too. But I think the balance is I'm glad you have that too.

00:42:53
Speaker 4: I love that you have your history.

00:42:56
Speaker 8: Friends that have nothing to do with any of it, and then you have of the people who have been there who can help help you kind of navigate the complicated emotional waters that we live in.

00:43:08
Speaker 4: Yeah, or just like swim beside me, even if it's not navigating. Yeah, because there are times where Bin's like I don't know either, and we're just like, okay, well we don't know together, you know, because it is it's a weird to get into a business where you are going to make a living creating something that you think is good enough for people to pay their money to watch. Because at the same time, you could be the most humble person, but if you don't have a bit of confidence even in the ego about what and it is a weird juxtaposition of at times I have no confidence at all, and at the same time I'd have all the confidence in the world to create something, to do a stage show, to do, a radio show, to do and expect people to give me their time and money for what I'm creating.

00:43:53
Speaker 8: The most complicated part about it is it's all appear like and that sometimes will will be the one factor that defines whether you go out there and kill it or don't, because it's all in your mind.

00:44:06
Speaker 4: You ever get it's all sad at seats that weren't sold. Oh yeah, of course.

00:44:11
Speaker 8: I think everybody does. And I gotta tell you, every single night I walk out there, it's not a given in my brain that there's going to be anybody out there.

00:44:19
Speaker 4: I swear to God. It's just crazy for me to hear you say that. By the way, it's crazy for me to hear you say.

00:44:24
Speaker 8: That, but it's true.

00:44:26
Speaker 1: The Bobby Cast will be right back. This is the Bobby Cast.

00:44:35
Speaker 2: At number six on the list is Hillary Scott from Lady A. Hillary was super vulnerable and she shared how she wrote a song about her having a miscarriage and how her faith has kept her going. There's Hillary Scott from episode four thirty two.

00:44:49
Speaker 4: Chris Tomlin is another example who I love that dude. And I asked him if there was pressure, And this is going to lead to the question I'm asking you. I asked him if there was pressure because and my wife when I you know, she's not super into the industry, or she's not in it at all, but she doesn't like care that much. She was like Christopher, we sang all Is hymn to church, and I was like, well, were you just saying Rock of Ages basically? You know all of ours were him? Yes, But I asked him if there was a pressure on him to be so godlike because that's how everyone knows him, because he's he's a normal human. And I'd found myself talking about a Christmas party we were having and I invited him over and it was like, not real money, but we were we were had vegas set up and what we were doing was donating to whomever won that night to their charity. And I was going to invite him and I was like, I'm not inviting him. It's gambling. And it was exactly what he told me that he did not want people to do to him. And so then I said, Chris, I'm so sorry I didn't invite you. Now I'm inviting you again because it's fun. So he lives with this wonderful but constant pressure of people to think he has to be godlike all the time. Do you feel the pressure on you, as a public person and even a Christian, an open Christian to always present we'll just say a good mood.

00:46:07
Speaker 11: Oh, I mean there's definite pressure, for sure, I think. But to me, what I am so grateful for about my relationship with God and my faith is that there there's a scripture that talks about when we are weak He is strong, So in our weaknesses, in our vulnerability, we actually connect deeper. We see how much we need him, Others see that we don't have it all together. I mean, I've heard it said so many times and it's so profound, and it's like church needs to be more like a hospital, like then a country club where you show up all buttoned up and presenting a certain way.

00:46:48
Speaker 10: It's like, no, we're all broken wanting to come.

00:46:50
Speaker 11: Together for the same reason, to receive the peace and the comfort and the grace and mercy of God, you know. And so I do definitely feel that pressure. But ironically, when you do share publicly or privately the hard things you're going through, that's.

00:47:09
Speaker 4: When you really connect with absolutely.

00:47:11
Speaker 11: I mean truly, Like that is where I've had the most just oh, the most rewarding conversations, the most rewarding DMS conversations.

00:47:22
Speaker 10: With people on Instagram.

00:47:23
Speaker 11: I mean it's just so to not be afraid to say what's really going on.

00:47:29
Speaker 4: I can ask you what and I'll share one with you too, so you don't feel alone here, but can ask you, like an example of that something that you would have spoken about that was difficult for you because I felt a lot of shame in mind, but I didn't realize that other people were writing alongside me with their own version of it. So what would an example of that be for you?

00:47:48
Speaker 11: I mean, one of the biggest was something that I still grieve every day, which is the miscarriage we had in between Isley and my twin girls, and just how it as I Will walked through and Chris and I walked through that experience, there was a big, you know, moment of like, are we going to share this? Are we going to But then when the only way I knew to pursue healing and just kind of keep moving was to write about it became a song. And then it was a song that I knew. I was like, I think people really need to hear this.

00:48:21
Speaker 6: And so.

00:48:23
Speaker 10: It was.

00:48:23
Speaker 11: It was that experience and one that continues to come up to the stay you know, that record came out, that song came out in twenty sixteen, and I still feel like when people come up to me, whether it's in the grocery store or to meet and greet, it's always it's always brought up.

00:48:40
Speaker 4: Were you surprised that that is what people attached through so strongly and that people still attached to it even seven years or so later.

00:48:52
Speaker 10: I think it.

00:48:53
Speaker 11: It doesn't surprise me because one in four women one and four pregnancies, not women one and four pregnancies and in miscarriage. So the statistics are so high that and not a lot of people know that that's how often it happens. So that's a whole lot of people, that's a whole lot of women, that's a whole lot of families. So I think that specific experience in the women and the families that I hear from who've experienced that exact thing, it isn't shocking. Now the other stories around the song, where it's met others in other ways, in different hardships in their life. Those always, I mean, they all touch my heart.

00:49:36
Speaker 10: They all just humble me and.

00:49:41
Speaker 11: Are very very priceless to me to be invited into those stories. But some of the ones that are about other things are the ones that like lay.

00:49:48
Speaker 4: Me out in the floor. When I wrote my first book, I was I don't know how to write a book. I mean I'd written some stuff, but never a book. And I thought no one would want to read a book for me anyway, And I thought I'm just gonna write everything, and then whatever I'm too ashamed of, I'm going to pull out. But I'm going to as and you probably deal with this writing you know, a song, a three minute version of this, but one hundred times. And so I wrote this book and it was a lot of my insecurity is a lot of what we all suffer through. But I wrote about my mom a lot. And my mom's not alive anymore. She died when she was forty seven or so. She died from basically drug abuse, drug and alcohol abuse, and it had gotten so bad with her. And it was some heavy drugs like meth. And I'm from Arkansas and it's it's poverty there, right, and like I never quite understood until I got older, but my mom had got so wrapped up in it that she would call and need money, and you know, she had started to go, well, I'm going to do porn and when your mom calls and tells you that, and I was and I remember writing that story and I was so I was so ashamed, and I was going to take it out. And I don't know why I didn't, because I never had the thought, I'll leave it in, it'll connect. I don't know how it lasted and landed. But I'm telling you, when I'll tour and do stand up, you want to know people talk to me about how it's not exactly the same, but everybody will come up. Not everybody, but I like people come up and go, I'm so glad you said this, because nobody says that addiction affects them in ways like this.

00:51:23
Speaker 9: Yes, and.

00:51:26
Speaker 4: Even now. I mean, I wrote that book six seven years ago, Like I couldn't believe that that was the connector. I thought, I'll write some funny stories, people will enjoy it, I'll write a but of everything that I wrote, I was most ashamed of a lot of the stuff that I had gone through in that part of my life and my world. But that was the that was the really the connector of all and I couldn't believe it. But it also shows me that the more raw and open you are, the more you're actually relatable. And I did not think that was the case.

00:52:02
Speaker 11: And I think the other beautiful benefit for you sharing it, and or at least for me for sharing it, is the freedom you feel because there was something in me with my story, Like if I had withheld that information, I would have really felt like I was moving through my life in not the most honest way that I could, and that I would be numbing some part of myself and that just didn't feel authentic. And so as scary as it was, I felt free.

00:52:35
Speaker 4: Did you feel when you were writing, when you're doing the music, because this is a bit how I felt too, like I had. Reliving it was kind of hard.

00:52:42
Speaker 11: Yes, yes, absolutely well in writing it. I mean I was in the middle of miscarring when I wrote the song, so it was very much like I'm in this right now talking about it right now. So as it got recorded, and then the times that I've I've performed it, we're saying it in church. It's definitely been a different experience remembering it, still feeling it deeply, but not like I was when.

00:53:13
Speaker 2: Okay, that was part one of the Top ten Bobby Cast of twenty twenty four. We got the rest the Top five coming up next week. I also want to mention a few other ones. Go listen to Jackson, dene Zach Top, Marcus King and those probably didn't make it because we did them so late in the year, but those were awesome episodes. If you missed any, just searched the Bobby Cast also type in the artists that you want to hear it.

00:53:34
Speaker 4: You'll find it. Boom, it'll pop up there.

00:53:36
Speaker 12: All right, Have good week everybody.

00:54:09
Speaker 1: Thanks for listening to a Bobby Cast production.

00:54:13
Speaker 12: Mm hmm