Turning the Inner Critic into a Cheerleader: Jodi Rae Solomon's Journey to Mindset Mastery and Veteran Empowerment
Have you ever felt overpowered by the inner critic that seems to hold a megaphone to all your doubts? Well, buckle in as I, Michael Cole, team up with the inspiring Jodi Rae Solomon, a Neuroencoding specialist and coach who's mastered the art of silencing that naysayer and turning it into a cheerleader. Through her personal evolution from victimhood to victory, Jodi unveils techniques that can help anyone, especially veterans, reclaim their joy and steer their own life course. We uncover her transition to a life of freedom on the open road with her trusty canine companion, illustrating that it's not just about where you are, but how you see it that shapes your happiness.
This episode doesn't stop at just storytelling; it's brimming with hands-on strategies to take you from stuck to unstoppable. Learn the ins and outs of the 'Stop Technique'—a method so effective it'll have your unresourceful thoughts packing their bags. We'll dig into the gritty details of how to transform your daily wins from mere footnotes to headline news in your personal narrative, and introduce you to 'Asstitude,' a vibrant blend of celebration and movement that's guaranteed to lift your spirits. As we wrap up, don't miss the exclusive sneak peek into our upcoming masterclass and a unique course designed to reshape not just your body, but your mindset towards weight loss. With Jodi's expertise and your willingness, we're on the cusp of crafting soul-amazing lives, one shift at a time.
Explore more episodes, resources, and updates from Mike Cole at:
https://YourThoughtsYourReality.com
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WEBVTT 00:00:02.967 --> 00:00:11.650 <v Speaker 1>Welcome to your Thoughts, your Reality with Michael Cole, the podcast that shines a compassionate light on the journey of veterans battling through life's challenges. 00:00:11.650 --> 00:00:23.466 <v Speaker 1>Michael is a dual elite certified neuro encoding specialist in coaching and keynote training presentations dedicated to guiding military veterans as they navigate the intricate pathways of post-deployment life. 00:00:23.466 --> 00:00:34.750 <v Speaker 1>Join him as we delve into the profound realm of neuroencoding science, empowering these brave individuals to conquer universal battles procrastination, self-doubt, fear and more. 00:00:34.750 --> 00:00:42.564 <v Speaker 1>Together, let's uncover the strength within you to re-engage with families and society, forging a new path forward. 00:00:47.267 --> 00:00:49.069 <v Speaker 2>Hello, hello, hello everybody. 00:00:49.069 --> 00:00:50.990 <v Speaker 2>Today we have a super special guest. 00:00:50.990 --> 00:00:55.654 <v Speaker 2>I'm super excited to have Jody Rae Solomon on here, the sole amazing coach. 00:00:55.654 --> 00:00:59.656 <v Speaker 2>Jody is a trainer for Robbins Research International. 00:00:59.656 --> 00:01:07.888 <v Speaker 2>She's also a one-star dual elite neuroencoding specialist and so much more. 00:01:07.888 --> 00:01:10.176 <v Speaker 2>So you know without further ado, jodi, why don't you tell us a little bit about yourself? 00:01:11.561 --> 00:01:13.789 <v Speaker 3>Hello Michael, it's so great to be here. 00:01:14.320 --> 00:01:39.373 <v Speaker 3>In addition to those two items, I'm also an ICF credentialed coach at the PCC level and a board certified coach coach at the PCC level and a board certified coach and all that means is that I have been highly trained by some of the top names in personal development so that I could learn tools to help empower your life and make massive shifts in the way you think and the way you approach life. 00:01:39.373 --> 00:01:42.924 <v Speaker 3>And I got to tell you I love my life. 00:01:42.924 --> 00:01:53.731 <v Speaker 3>I'm one of those people that decided I wanted to really take my brand to another level and you know I tell people, let's create a soul amazing life. 00:01:53.731 --> 00:01:56.790 <v Speaker 3>And I looked at what does a soul amazing life for Jodi look like? 00:01:56.790 --> 00:02:07.941 <v Speaker 3>And I decided that I wanted adventure, I loved freedom, I wanted adventure, I loved freedom. 00:02:07.941 --> 00:02:25.168 <v Speaker 3>And so, about eight months ago, I moved full time into a camper van on a solo adventure across the United States with just me and my dog, and I am living that life of freedom and joy in the pneumatic digital lifestyle and just really creating that life that I want. 00:02:25.207 --> 00:02:30.669 <v Speaker 2>That's fantastic, and so you know I got to tell you, jodi, one of my favorite things is when I get to see pictures of you on your journeys. 00:02:30.669 --> 00:02:33.449 <v Speaker 2>You know when you're with the dog and you're here or you're there. 00:02:33.449 --> 00:02:34.705 <v Speaker 2>You know that kind of thing. 00:02:34.705 --> 00:02:35.985 <v Speaker 2>It's pretty special. 00:02:35.985 --> 00:02:37.506 <v Speaker 2>So thanks for sharing that. 00:02:37.506 --> 00:02:39.301 <v Speaker 2>And of course, you know about you. 00:02:39.301 --> 00:02:42.967 <v Speaker 2>So, if we can, I'd love to just kind of jump in. 00:02:42.967 --> 00:02:44.408 <v Speaker 2>I mean, we got a lot to go through. 00:02:44.408 --> 00:02:47.894 <v Speaker 2>We have 30 minutes and you're such a plethora of knowledge and information. 00:02:47.894 --> 00:02:48.814 <v Speaker 2>I'd love to just start. 00:02:48.814 --> 00:02:55.001 <v Speaker 2>Let's do it. 00:02:55.001 --> 00:02:55.484 <v Speaker 2>All right, excellent. 00:02:55.484 --> 00:03:06.653 <v Speaker 2>So if you can, can you share, you know, your personal story of experience that kind of illustrates your journey from battling the inner critic to championing the inner cheerleader, especially in the context of weight and life transformation? 00:03:07.941 --> 00:03:10.045 <v Speaker 3>I would love to share that you know about. 00:03:10.045 --> 00:03:17.568 <v Speaker 3>I want to say, probably seven years ago now, I was one of those women who was completely in victim mode. 00:03:17.568 --> 00:03:20.280 <v Speaker 3>Everything was everybody else's fault. 00:03:20.280 --> 00:03:24.568 <v Speaker 3>I had zero personal responsibility. 00:03:24.568 --> 00:03:30.203 <v Speaker 3>If I was unhappy it was because so-and-so said this or so-and-so did that. 00:03:30.203 --> 00:03:45.197 <v Speaker 3>And as I delved into personal development, I started to realize that I was responsible for my happiness, I was responsible for my joy and I was responsible for my choices. 00:03:45.197 --> 00:04:02.373 <v Speaker 3>And those choices included the people I had in my life, the way I allowed people to speak to me and the way I responded to them when they spoke to me and the thoughts that I thought in regards to that. 00:04:03.319 --> 00:04:07.342 <v Speaker 3>And I started to really follow a gentleman called Michael Singer. 00:04:07.342 --> 00:04:20.482 <v Speaker 3>He wrote the Untethered Soul and it was the first time I heard somebody speak about this voice in my head that was always chattering away and I thought, oh my God, this guy gets me. 00:04:20.482 --> 00:04:23.968 <v Speaker 3>Because I knew I had always had that voice in my head. 00:04:23.968 --> 00:04:40.444 <v Speaker 3>And the more I really started to look at that voice and recognize its influence in my life, I realized why I was so unhappy Because I was recycling thoughts. 00:04:40.444 --> 00:04:45.959 <v Speaker 3>It's called rumination, but I was recycling thoughts over and over thoughts. 00:04:45.959 --> 00:04:59.913 <v Speaker 3>It's called rumination, but I was recycling thoughts over and over, replaying conversations with people as if I could go back and change it, and all that did was create a level of anger that continued to see, because I couldn't change the past and I felt like I had no control. 00:04:59.913 --> 00:05:26.201 <v Speaker 3>Right out of his mouth were always you didn't mow the lawn, you didn't wash the dishes, the house isa mess, whatever. 00:05:27.062 --> 00:05:29.168 <v Speaker 3>And immediately I would go on the defensive. 00:05:29.168 --> 00:05:33.466 <v Speaker 3>I was not wanting to be around this man because I immediately felt criticized. 00:05:33.466 --> 00:05:37.016 <v Speaker 3>Well, that's what our inner critic does. 00:05:37.016 --> 00:05:39.562 <v Speaker 3>It's always talking negative to us. 00:05:39.562 --> 00:05:45.413 <v Speaker 3>And my sister said to me what if that's dad's way of showing love? 00:05:45.413 --> 00:05:50.045 <v Speaker 3>And that made me start to really think. 00:05:50.045 --> 00:05:56.514 <v Speaker 3>Okay, what if that voice in my head is actually there for my good? 00:05:57.740 --> 00:06:07.081 <v Speaker 3>And the more I explored that and the more I started to understand, I realized that my inner critic was saying all these negative things to me and I was hearing them as negative. 00:06:07.081 --> 00:06:09.404 <v Speaker 3>But what if they were really positive? 00:06:09.404 --> 00:06:13.973 <v Speaker 3>What if that was my way of motivating myself to get the goals? 00:06:13.973 --> 00:06:19.807 <v Speaker 3>So whenever I would say, oh Jodi, you're so fat, I'd say Wait a minute. 00:06:19.807 --> 00:06:22.711 <v Speaker 3>What is my inner critic really saying? 00:06:22.711 --> 00:06:32.786 <v Speaker 3>Well, my inner critic was really saying Jodi, I really know that you want to be a healthy woman and what you're doing right now is not going to get you there. 00:06:32.786 --> 00:06:48.420 <v Speaker 3>And just by taking that step back and recognizing it and thanking that voice in my head for reminding me what my goals were, I was able to then thank it, honor it and then make a new choice. 00:06:48.420 --> 00:06:57.927 <v Speaker 3>And that, for me, is really how we take our power back and we transform that inner critic into our inner cheerleader. 00:06:58.629 --> 00:07:00.055 <v Speaker 2>Absolutely, and it's we go back to. 00:07:00.055 --> 00:07:01.600 <v Speaker 2>You know from the Neurocoding Institute. 00:07:01.600 --> 00:07:04.927 <v Speaker 2>Right, your thoughts, and let's go to the podcast. 00:07:04.927 --> 00:07:06.290 <v Speaker 2>Your thoughts, your reality, right. 00:07:06.290 --> 00:07:08.915 <v Speaker 2>If you can change that, what else can you accomplish? 00:07:08.915 --> 00:07:11.725 <v Speaker 2>And you're living proof of it. 00:07:11.725 --> 00:07:14.733 <v Speaker 2>So can I ask a personal question Please? 00:07:14.733 --> 00:07:17.625 <v Speaker 2>How much weight have you lost? 00:07:18.841 --> 00:07:30.975 <v Speaker 3>Haha, I have actually lost or let go of permanently 120 pounds of body insulation, which is 49% of my body weight. 00:07:30.975 --> 00:07:36.093 <v Speaker 3>I was 250 pounds and a size 24. 00:07:36.093 --> 00:07:39.583 <v Speaker 3>I'm now 130 pounds and a size four. 00:07:39.583 --> 00:07:56.336 <v Speaker 3>It took me 18 months and I've kept it off permanently now for more than six months and just loving life because I was able to literally take that inner critic and create the inner cheerleader. 00:07:57.379 --> 00:07:57.620 <v Speaker 2>Awesome. 00:07:57.620 --> 00:08:02.286 <v Speaker 2>So I would like to do an outer cheerleader right now and just celebrate you and your journey. 00:08:02.286 --> 00:08:06.994 <v Speaker 2>So, celebrating, thank you, fantastic. 00:08:06.994 --> 00:08:11.391 <v Speaker 2>And that's the trick, right, is changing your relationship with food and so on to keep the weight off. 00:08:11.391 --> 00:08:20.333 <v Speaker 2>I know I've done yo-yo dieting before and until I started working with Titus Gene Titus it was the same thing. 00:08:20.333 --> 00:08:29.961 <v Speaker 2>It was, you know, just lose it and then like, for me it was always like a science project, so I enjoyed that. 00:08:29.961 --> 00:08:32.111 <v Speaker 2>You know, it's like, okay, I'm diving in and what can I do and measuring things, and I enjoyed it. 00:08:32.111 --> 00:08:34.361 <v Speaker 2>But then at some point it's like, okay, well, I made my goal and I would gain the weight back. 00:08:34.361 --> 00:08:39.688 <v Speaker 2>Right, it's literally changing the relationship with food for me, you know, and so I just want to congratulate you for what you do. 00:09:00.580 --> 00:09:01.763 <v Speaker 3>Thank you, and you know, when it comes to that, all diets work. 00:09:01.763 --> 00:09:02.644 <v Speaker 3>In the short term, every diet works. 00:09:02.644 --> 00:09:13.822 <v Speaker 3>But what happens when you have that stressful day and you're like, look, I don't have the emotional energy to deal with the diet, and so you cheat and the next thing you know you've cheated your way out of quitting, and really it comes down to when we change our relationship with ourself. 00:09:13.822 --> 00:09:23.591 <v Speaker 3>It allows us to then get through those stressful moments from a different perspective, utilizing different coping mechanisms that are far more empowering. 00:09:24.460 --> 00:09:26.303 <v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, I love that and thank you. 00:09:26.303 --> 00:09:30.212 <v Speaker 2>So I love to say you kind of led us into the next question. 00:09:30.212 --> 00:09:34.205 <v Speaker 2>So mindset shifts. 00:09:34.205 --> 00:09:43.609 <v Speaker 2>So how do you help veterans understand that the past does not equal the future and what are some key mindset shifts that need to? 00:09:43.609 --> 00:09:46.333 <v Speaker 2>We all need to embrace to see this change. 00:09:47.321 --> 00:09:48.726 <v Speaker 3>Oh, that's such a great question. 00:09:48.726 --> 00:09:53.028 <v Speaker 3>So you know, have you ever fired a gun? 00:09:53.028 --> 00:09:55.273 <v Speaker 3>Yes, Okay. 00:09:55.273 --> 00:09:58.408 <v Speaker 3>So when you're holding the gun, where's the trigger? 00:10:00.581 --> 00:10:04.773 <v Speaker 3>On the bottom of the gun next to my finger, next to your finger, right, yes, okay, so we talk a. 00:10:04.773 --> 00:10:13.017 <v Speaker 3>Next to your finger, right, yes, okay, so we talk a lot about oh, I got triggered as if someone else pulled the trigger. 00:10:13.017 --> 00:10:24.332 <v Speaker 3>But what if you're holding the gun and it's nothing more than the trigger? 00:10:24.332 --> 00:10:27.395 <v Speaker 3>Is your response to whatever it was that happened? 00:10:27.395 --> 00:10:29.586 <v Speaker 3>No one else can trigger you. 00:10:29.586 --> 00:10:34.869 <v Speaker 3>You are triggering yourself by pulling back the trigger and firing the gun. 00:10:35.429 --> 00:10:46.693 <v Speaker 3>So the mindset shift really, at that point comes back to did I get triggered by someone else or did I allow my thoughts from the past to hijack my current moment? 00:10:46.693 --> 00:10:53.206 <v Speaker 3>And I chose to respond as if my past was happening right now. 00:10:53.206 --> 00:11:04.437 <v Speaker 3>And the person in front of you who is triggering you might actually remind you in a lot of ways about a past person or a past situation. 00:11:04.437 --> 00:11:08.910 <v Speaker 3>However, that person is not your past. 00:11:08.910 --> 00:11:10.748 <v Speaker 3>They're your current reality. 00:11:10.748 --> 00:11:27.092 <v Speaker 3>Give them your current self rather than your past self, by just stopping and taking a breath and recognizing that my past is not happening right now. 00:11:27.092 --> 00:11:30.100 <v Speaker 3>This is my moment, right here in front of me. 00:11:30.100 --> 00:11:33.062 <v Speaker 3>What do I choose to respond here? 00:11:33.062 --> 00:11:45.517 <v Speaker 3>And that allows us to create that space around us so that we can literally put the past in the past and keep it there and change our response in the present moment. 00:11:46.340 --> 00:11:48.143 <v Speaker 2>Absolutely Love it. 00:11:48.143 --> 00:11:54.615 <v Speaker 2>And there are neuro encoding tricks to help us snap out and default back to our best selves and best thoughts as well. 00:11:54.615 --> 00:11:58.197 <v Speaker 2>Want to give a couple of thoughts on the neuron coding tricks. 00:11:58.197 --> 00:12:00.023 <v Speaker 2>I'd love to hear it. 00:12:00.222 --> 00:12:24.832 <v Speaker 3>You know there's a plethora of them and I utilize those as well as some of the skills that I've learned within Robbins Research International, and they mesh so well together because, you know, I work with a lot of participants at Tony Robbins events and so I get to help work them through the process. 00:12:24.832 --> 00:12:51.010 <v Speaker 3>But in the Neuroencoding Institute we learn to teach people how to do it on themselves so that they don't need somebody to hold their hand every time, and to be able to, you know, just use that stop technique to interrupt your pattern so that you can make a new choice and, you know, scramble that language in your head so that it's fun, because if you're not having fun you're doing it wrong. 00:12:51.753 --> 00:12:55.179 <v Speaker 2>Absolutely, and people have heard the stop technique a little bit before. 00:12:55.179 --> 00:13:05.826 <v Speaker 2>In fact, Carla was on here and actually changed hers and I think we've all tweaked it to to fit what we feel good about, but she actually has a religious one. 00:13:05.826 --> 00:13:07.190 <v Speaker 2>That was really, really cool. 00:13:07.190 --> 00:13:09.143 <v Speaker 2>Um, just popped into my head. 00:13:09.143 --> 00:13:10.407 <v Speaker 2>I love that. 00:13:10.407 --> 00:13:12.361 <v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, you know what it was fun? 00:13:12.361 --> 00:13:13.886 <v Speaker 2>I and she had me do it and it was. 00:13:13.886 --> 00:13:14.428 <v Speaker 2>It was great. 00:13:14.428 --> 00:13:14.830 <v Speaker 2>Um. 00:13:14.830 --> 00:13:18.350 <v Speaker 2>So can I ask you to just briefly describe it? 00:13:18.350 --> 00:13:21.340 <v Speaker 2>We, it was great. 00:13:21.340 --> 00:13:22.302 <v Speaker 2>So can I ask you to just briefly describe it? 00:13:22.302 --> 00:13:23.943 <v Speaker 2>We don't need to work through it, but briefly describe what the stop technique is. 00:13:23.964 --> 00:13:29.471 <v Speaker 3>If someone hasn't seen a previous episode, you know it's when you're having those unresourceful thoughts and you know you, just you. 00:13:29.471 --> 00:13:32.035 <v Speaker 3>You are in that unresourceful state. 00:13:32.035 --> 00:13:53.129 <v Speaker 3>You're like stop, and then you change your state and you put a smile on and then you go back to the unresourceful state and then you stop and you get into a better state and you go back and forth so quickly that your brain gets confused where you're supposed to be and you start laughing and having fun with it and it has totally interrupted the pattern to where. 00:13:53.129 --> 00:13:59.169 <v Speaker 3>Then going back into that unresourceful state feels pretty silly at that moment. 00:14:00.441 --> 00:14:00.782 <v Speaker 2>It does. 00:14:00.782 --> 00:14:13.587 <v Speaker 2>And when you think about doing it like for me, doing the stop technique, like I will just think about doing it and it'll change my pattern and I'll condition myself to do it so that literally I'll think about it and I'll just start smiling. 00:14:13.587 --> 00:14:16.927 <v Speaker 2>And you can't be upset, angry, anxious if you're smiling. 00:14:16.927 --> 00:14:17.229 <v Speaker 2>No, you can't. 00:14:17.229 --> 00:14:18.855 <v Speaker 2>You cannot be angry, anxious if you're smiling, right? 00:14:18.875 --> 00:14:19.639 <v Speaker 3>No, you can't. 00:14:19.639 --> 00:14:23.291 <v Speaker 3>You cannot be angry at all while you're smiling. 00:14:23.291 --> 00:14:31.333 <v Speaker 3>I think that's why, when you go to a doctor or whatever and they're doing something, they're like smile. 00:14:31.333 --> 00:14:32.764 <v Speaker 3>And you're like why? 00:14:32.764 --> 00:14:40.092 <v Speaker 3>Because it'll keep you from feeling the level of pain that otherwise you would, because it changes your focus. 00:14:40.559 --> 00:14:42.326 <v Speaker 2>Yeah, and I've never thought about that. 00:14:42.326 --> 00:14:42.969 <v Speaker 2>It's totally true. 00:14:42.969 --> 00:14:46.048 <v Speaker 2>Yeah, now, I know it's trick. 00:14:48.341 --> 00:14:50.448 <v Speaker 3>Oh yes, I revealed a little secret there. 00:14:51.181 --> 00:14:53.346 <v Speaker 2>You did so in your approach. 00:14:53.346 --> 00:14:56.732 <v Speaker 2>You mentioned the importance of understanding the real message underneath the message. 00:14:56.732 --> 00:15:00.644 <v Speaker 2>The importance of understanding the real message underneath the message. 00:15:00.644 --> 00:15:07.926 <v Speaker 2>Could you elaborate this concept a little bit for us and maybe even give an example so we can understand how dramatically someone can change their response to the inner? 00:15:07.946 --> 00:15:18.596 <v Speaker 3>critic Absolutely, and it's similar to the example I said earlier when my dad would come to my house and he would criticize my housekeeping abilities or whatnot. 00:15:18.596 --> 00:15:29.447 <v Speaker 3>He was really just showing love, because what he was trying to say to me was I know that you have a better standard for your life and I want you to meet that. 00:15:29.447 --> 00:15:34.182 <v Speaker 3>And so when I take that and I look at what are the thoughts that I think okay. 00:15:34.182 --> 00:15:49.832 <v Speaker 3>So if I'm going to say to myself, oh, jodi, you should not be eating this food right now, or what were you thinking, I get to stop and ask okay, what is the message that's really being sent to me here? 00:15:49.832 --> 00:15:57.541 <v Speaker 3>And recognize that my inner critic is saying I want you to hit your goals, I want you to hit your goals. 00:15:57.620 --> 00:16:09.090 <v Speaker 3>But when you think about children as children, when we are trying to train our children not to run in the street and our children start running towards the street, what do we do? 00:16:09.090 --> 00:16:11.792 <v Speaker 3>We immediately react. 00:16:11.792 --> 00:16:14.894 <v Speaker 3>We yell, we scream, we do something to get their attention. 00:16:14.894 --> 00:16:18.576 <v Speaker 3>Our inner critic is doing nothing more than modeling that. 00:16:18.576 --> 00:16:24.782 <v Speaker 3>And so our inner critic is in there reacting. 00:16:24.802 --> 00:16:32.355 <v Speaker 3>It's saying the harsh words because it thinks that if it gets us to stop and and look around, that we'll, we'll, we'll change our approach. 00:16:32.355 --> 00:16:32.700 <v Speaker 3>Right? 00:16:32.700 --> 00:16:34.985 <v Speaker 3>That works when you're three. 00:16:34.985 --> 00:16:40.500 <v Speaker 3>It doesn't work when you're in your 20s and 30s, 40s and older, right? 00:16:40.500 --> 00:16:44.750 <v Speaker 3>And so when we say, all right, what is the inner critic saying? 00:16:44.750 --> 00:16:49.567 <v Speaker 3>When the inner critic says something judgmental like what were you thinking? 00:16:49.567 --> 00:17:09.794 <v Speaker 3>Or God, you should not be eating that food, well, the inner critic is really saying I know that you want to lose weight, I know that you want to reach that goal, I know that this was not the outcome that you wanted and I want to help you get there. 00:17:09.794 --> 00:17:21.104 <v Speaker 3>But it only knows the tool of what it learned as a child to stop and criticize to get your attention, what it learned as a child to stop and criticize to get your attention. 00:17:21.104 --> 00:17:26.913 <v Speaker 3>And so to say thank you, thank you for reminding me of what it is that I really want. 00:17:32.944 --> 00:17:36.519 <v Speaker 2>And how can I get there in a more positive way? 00:17:36.519 --> 00:17:39.685 <v Speaker 2>Love it, yeah, and it's, it's such a great reframe. 00:17:39.685 --> 00:17:40.548 <v Speaker 2>I just, I just love it. 00:17:40.548 --> 00:17:50.913 <v Speaker 2>Um so, and you can use that literally in any, anything, any thought, any, any negative emotion or or thought everywhere. 00:17:51.375 --> 00:18:05.258 <v Speaker 3>Yeah, fantastic, I mean I I, a friend of mine, was with me one day and apparently apparently living in a camper van, I I talk out loud now, but I don't think it really has to do with a camper van. 00:18:05.258 --> 00:18:06.614 <v Speaker 3>I think it's just that as, as humans, we tend to talk out loud now, but I don't think it really has to do with a camper van. 00:18:06.614 --> 00:18:13.945 <v Speaker 3>I think it's just that, as humans, we tend to talk out loud and there's no shame in that. 00:18:13.945 --> 00:18:16.228 <v Speaker 3>And I, I did something. 00:18:16.228 --> 00:18:17.973 <v Speaker 3>I said, oh, jodi, you're so stupid. 00:18:17.973 --> 00:18:22.686 <v Speaker 3>And I literally heard myself and I says, oh, my God. 00:18:22.686 --> 00:18:25.076 <v Speaker 3>And then I started with Jodi. 00:18:25.076 --> 00:18:27.671 <v Speaker 3>Now you, you know we don't talk to ourselves that way. 00:18:27.671 --> 00:18:30.518 <v Speaker 3>You were being adorable in this moment. 00:18:30.518 --> 00:18:35.295 <v Speaker 3>You made a mistake and I'm so proud of you for moving forward in the direction you're moving in. 00:18:35.295 --> 00:18:38.750 <v Speaker 3>And my friend was like, do you talk like that in your head? 00:18:39.211 --> 00:18:46.299 <v Speaker 2>I'm like, absolutely and we all should we're. 00:18:46.299 --> 00:18:48.563 <v Speaker 2>We're so set on, uh, or not set. 00:18:48.563 --> 00:18:54.721 <v Speaker 2>Just naturally, we, we, you know, have that inner critic, you know, and having the inner cheerleader would be so much better, wouldn't it? 00:18:55.230 --> 00:19:06.500 <v Speaker 3>and I've just trained myself that I want to talk to myself like I would love a loving parent to talk to me and so that's where I created my inner cheerleader. 00:19:06.500 --> 00:19:21.624 <v Speaker 3>That's the voice that she comes through with, and so when I catch myself in those negative, inner critic thoughts, I stop and I provide myself with the love that I wish I had, and it makes all the difference. 00:19:22.770 --> 00:19:23.573 <v Speaker 2>That's fantastic. 00:19:23.573 --> 00:19:32.721 <v Speaker 2>So when you catch yourself with the inner critic, tell us the I mean, you catch yourself and what do you do specifically to switch it? 00:19:32.721 --> 00:19:33.932 <v Speaker 2>Do you just stop yourself? 00:19:33.932 --> 00:19:40.732 <v Speaker 2>And you can you automatically, I'm assuming change your physiology and so on to to change the mindset. 00:19:41.073 --> 00:19:41.795 <v Speaker 3>What do you do? 00:19:41.795 --> 00:19:43.939 <v Speaker 3>The first thing is observing it. 00:19:43.939 --> 00:20:04.383 <v Speaker 3>If you don't observe that it's happening because most people don't even recognize that our brain is constantly chattering and our brain does not care what it's chattering about you could be walking up the stairs and your brain is going right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot your brain is always having a conversation, unless you have mastered the art of meditation. 00:20:04.383 --> 00:20:08.353 <v Speaker 3>So the first thing is to start observing your thoughts. 00:20:08.353 --> 00:20:23.680 <v Speaker 3>Once you observe what is happening and you're like, oh my gosh, like I'm, I'm like participating in this, then you can step out and watch it like a movie Instead of being an active participant. 00:20:23.680 --> 00:20:25.387 <v Speaker 3>Then you can start watching it like a movie. 00:20:25.387 --> 00:20:30.901 <v Speaker 3>And I tell all my clients start writing down the thoughts that you recognize that you're thinking. 00:20:30.901 --> 00:20:40.078 <v Speaker 3>That way we can see the patterns and the themes in your life that you tend to criticize yourself about the most, because that's going to help us to see what your goals really are. 00:20:40.078 --> 00:20:44.372 <v Speaker 3>And once we observe, we understand it's happening. 00:20:44.692 --> 00:21:08.233 <v Speaker 3>Then I ask my clients once you're in that moment and you recognize it's happening, I want you to do something or anything that's going to change the moment, whether it's standing up, pulling your shoulders back, taking a deep breath, turning the radio on, whatever it is that's going to physically move your body and cause your breath to be different, and that's going to also move your body and cause your breath to be different, and that's going to also start to change the focus. 00:21:09.135 --> 00:21:19.864 <v Speaker 3>By changing the way we focus, then we can step out of the criticism and now we can ask ourselves okay, what is the actual goal under here? 00:21:19.864 --> 00:21:23.415 <v Speaker 3>What's the critic trying to say and how can I love on that? 00:21:23.415 --> 00:21:25.881 <v Speaker 3>How can I love me in this moment? 00:21:25.881 --> 00:21:37.835 <v Speaker 3>What can I say to me in this moment that would make me feel better, so that I am more pulled towards the pain, because we will do more to avoid pain than gain pleasure. 00:21:37.835 --> 00:21:50.797 <v Speaker 3>However, when we're talking about the inner critic, the inner critic is like only utilizing pain, and what it does is it causes us to stop chasing our goals. 00:21:50.797 --> 00:21:54.971 <v Speaker 3>Instead of chasing them, we want to learn how to chase our goals. 00:21:55.814 --> 00:21:58.179 <v Speaker 2>Absolutely, Because you're what's the song? 00:21:58.179 --> 00:22:00.250 <v Speaker 2>Because your dreams won't chase you back. 00:22:00.951 --> 00:22:10.746 <v Speaker 3>Right, yeah, and speaking of songs, I think one of my favorite songs is a song by, I think it's Sister Hazel Change your Mind. 00:22:10.746 --> 00:22:13.491 <v Speaker 3>And I got to tell you. 00:22:13.491 --> 00:22:24.493 <v Speaker 3>It's just one of those mantras for my life, because when you start to change your mindset, what you look at changes Totally, absolutely. 00:22:24.493 --> 00:22:35.355 <v Speaker 3>And then everything you feel changes because, as you know, as we learn in the New England Coding Institute, that what we think is what we feel, and what we feel is what we do, and what we do is what we have. 00:22:36.176 --> 00:22:42.830 <v Speaker 2>Absolutely, and it is true and a staple in my life Excellent. 00:22:42.830 --> 00:22:47.343 <v Speaker 2>So let's kind of dive into something a little deeper for veterans, if we can. 00:22:47.343 --> 00:22:51.817 <v Speaker 2>When veterans come back, a lot of times they struggle with things. 00:22:51.817 --> 00:22:55.214 <v Speaker 2>I've seen that in my work constantly. 00:22:55.214 --> 00:23:14.852 <v Speaker 2>I'm not creating a blanket statement everybody that's listening or will listen in the future, but it's a pattern that happens more often than not, I would say, because when you come back from the military I don't care if you're in active duty, reserves or whatever the case may be you and your family and the people around you have all changed right as we grow, you know. 00:23:14.852 --> 00:23:21.545 <v Speaker 2>So we're coming into a different society, a different family dynamic, the whole thing. 00:23:21.670 --> 00:23:41.107 <v Speaker 2>So my question, jodi, is when they're coming back and this is for the families too let's not forget the silent heroes, if you will, the families that are battling their own journey at home when reengaging with society and family members and things like that. 00:23:41.107 --> 00:23:51.959 <v Speaker 2>Give us some thoughts on how we can use the inner critic and even more so, the inner cheerleader, to really reconnect and slow down. 00:23:51.959 --> 00:23:55.988 <v Speaker 2>And just how do I say this? 00:23:55.988 --> 00:23:59.073 <v Speaker 2>Really communicate is really what's needed. 00:23:59.073 --> 00:24:01.134 <v Speaker 2>So give me some thoughts on that, will you? 00:24:01.154 --> 00:24:03.038 <v Speaker 3>on that will you. 00:24:03.038 --> 00:24:26.664 <v Speaker 3>It's interestingly enough, I actually coached someone who had a lot of PTSD as he was reentering society from the Navy and he had been overseas and the particular assignment that he had was fairly brutal and just a different way of thinking and looking at things. 00:24:26.664 --> 00:24:41.344 <v Speaker 3>And so you know, it was really about helping this, this gentleman, re-engage, seeing the needs of the people in front of him and recognizing his own needs. 00:24:41.344 --> 00:24:46.038 <v Speaker 3>I think we often overlook what our needs actually are. 00:24:46.038 --> 00:24:55.530 <v Speaker 3>And you know, when it comes to the inner critic, just recognizing what those thoughts are happening, that we all have stories in our head. 00:24:55.530 --> 00:24:58.999 <v Speaker 3>We are every single human is a creative storyteller. 00:24:58.999 --> 00:25:05.420 <v Speaker 3>The question is are you telling a story that is empowering your life or disempowering your life? 00:25:05.420 --> 00:25:33.520 <v Speaker 3>And you know, in the re-engagement process, just looking at what are the stories that you're telling yourself and are there ways for you to step out of the story for a moment, look at it from someone else's perspective and kind of understand what they might be feeling, what they might be thinking, and that allows you to connect and then really looking at what is your goal. 00:25:33.520 --> 00:25:43.395 <v Speaker 3>So it goes back to looking at the inner critic, what's the inner critic really saying to us and recognizing in those moments what it is my need is. 00:25:43.395 --> 00:25:48.790 <v Speaker 3>I want to connect with my wife again, but I don't know how. 00:25:48.790 --> 00:25:57.675 <v Speaker 3>Or I want to connect with my spouse who's been overseas, but you know, he or she seems like they're off in another world. 00:25:57.675 --> 00:26:07.022 <v Speaker 3>And how can I step into an understanding of their model of the world so that I can communicate my needs and my support? 00:26:07.022 --> 00:26:11.436 <v Speaker 3>And I think that's so critical that we really do that. 00:26:12.378 --> 00:26:42.256 <v Speaker 3>But the most important piece in any transformation regardless of if you're reentering society from a military background or you're just changing careers or having some type of life transition is celebration, because we as a society are told that if we celebrate we're being egotistical or being full of ourselves. 00:26:42.256 --> 00:26:46.832 <v Speaker 3>We shouldn't celebrate, and we're even trained like that as children. 00:26:46.832 --> 00:26:49.837 <v Speaker 3>As children in school, you get your spelling test back. 00:26:49.837 --> 00:26:56.037 <v Speaker 3>You're looking at the three that you got wrong on the test instead of the 97 you got right. 00:26:56.037 --> 00:26:58.362 <v Speaker 3>So true, lord, so true. 00:26:58.362 --> 00:27:02.102 <v Speaker 3>And that's a big part in that inner critic. 00:27:02.102 --> 00:27:07.458 <v Speaker 3>Because that inner critic is always looking at what you're doing wrong here, what I can do better to achieve more right. 00:27:07.458 --> 00:27:18.424 <v Speaker 3>But what if we stopped and we started to celebrate the 97 things that we did right and focused on that instead of the three we did wrong. 00:27:18.424 --> 00:27:21.234 <v Speaker 3>That would absolutely change everything. 00:27:21.234 --> 00:27:28.971 <v Speaker 3>So the key really is when you are transitioning everything. 00:27:28.971 --> 00:27:30.636 <v Speaker 3>So the key really is when you are transitioning, celebrate every win. 00:27:30.656 --> 00:27:31.259 <v Speaker 3>And I even tell clients look. 00:27:31.259 --> 00:27:32.343 <v Speaker 3>I want you to look in the mirror for 30 days. 00:27:32.343 --> 00:27:35.273 <v Speaker 3>I want you to tell yourself five things you did great today. 00:27:35.273 --> 00:27:47.603 <v Speaker 3>And it's going to feel painful at first and you might only be able to say, well, I got out of bed today, I brushed my teeth, I utilized the bathroom, I got dressed. 00:27:47.603 --> 00:27:57.138 <v Speaker 3>But by the end of 30 days, if you do it consistently, you will start to see other things that you're doing great because you're starting to focus on that now. 00:27:57.138 --> 00:28:07.523 <v Speaker 3>Like, oh, I held the door open for someone, I spoke kindly to my spouse, I made a meal for someone, I gave an extra tip, whatever that thing is. 00:28:07.523 --> 00:28:11.502 <v Speaker 3>You'll start to recognize that you are doing great things. 00:28:11.502 --> 00:28:16.676 <v Speaker 3>And when you celebrate, everything starts to change because you're focusing in a different way. 00:28:17.278 --> 00:28:19.022 <v Speaker 2>Yeah, fantastic, and I love that. 00:28:19.022 --> 00:28:23.058 <v Speaker 2>You know we don't teach theory, we do these things ourselves. 00:28:23.058 --> 00:28:25.212 <v Speaker 2>You know, I mean as coaches and we should. 00:28:25.212 --> 00:28:32.490 <v Speaker 2>If you're a coach and you're not doing these things yourself that you're teaching, try it Exactly, Game right. 00:28:32.490 --> 00:28:36.858 <v Speaker 2>So I, I love that and I'm going to go just a little further. 00:28:36.939 --> 00:28:42.435 <v Speaker 2>So, when you do celebrate, it's a pat yourself on the back, you know, smile. 00:28:42.435 --> 00:28:48.586 <v Speaker 2>And here's the thing that we all we learned, and I'll tell you what it's a game changer, because you're changing all your physiology and moving your body. 00:28:48.586 --> 00:28:51.692 <v Speaker 2>It's called astitute, shake your ass. 00:28:51.692 --> 00:28:54.135 <v Speaker 2>You cannot look, see, look at Jodi right there. 00:28:54.135 --> 00:28:56.839 <v Speaker 2>I'm thinking about her smiling Absolutely. 00:28:56.839 --> 00:29:02.857 <v Speaker 2>Yeah, I mean, the more you move your body when you're celebrating and really take that in, and you know what? 00:29:02.857 --> 00:29:05.513 <v Speaker 2>Yeah, I brushed my teeth Astitude, do it. 00:29:06.045 --> 00:29:09.487 <v Speaker 2>It doesn't matter how small it is, the more, just like Jodi was saying, I love that. 00:29:09.487 --> 00:29:13.573 <v Speaker 2>The more you do it, the more it just becomes part of your brain's looking for more of it. 00:29:13.573 --> 00:29:15.875 <v Speaker 2>So don't, don't forget to celebrate. 00:29:15.875 --> 00:29:17.898 <v Speaker 2>It changes the entire game. 00:29:17.898 --> 00:29:24.906 <v Speaker 2>It changes the game, it makes you grateful and there's all kinds of other things that um, of course we're getting low on time that we're not going to go into right now. 00:29:24.906 --> 00:29:30.727 <v Speaker 2>So, um, thank you, jody, fantastic, fantastic information and and thoughts. 00:29:30.727 --> 00:29:31.288 <v Speaker 2>So thank you. 00:29:31.288 --> 00:29:33.694 <v Speaker 2>Um, so we're getting close to the end here. 00:29:33.694 --> 00:29:37.070 <v Speaker 2>We're going to run over but hey, that's the name of the game I we can. 00:29:37.070 --> 00:29:41.105 <v Speaker 2>So, jodi, tell us a little bit about you. 00:29:41.105 --> 00:29:42.627 <v Speaker 2>Know how people can reach out to you? 00:29:44.731 --> 00:29:46.315 <v Speaker 3>You can check me out on my website. 00:29:46.315 --> 00:29:48.179 <v Speaker 3>It's soulamazingcom. 00:29:48.179 --> 00:29:56.058 <v Speaker 3>When I tell people about my brand, I say, look, it's when you become so amazing that it changes your soul. 00:29:56.058 --> 00:30:07.737 <v Speaker 3>So soulamazingcom is the best way to get a feel for who I am, and then there'll be links there if you want to book a call or anything like that. 00:30:07.737 --> 00:30:14.055 <v Speaker 3>I also am getting ready to launch an entire new class. 00:30:14.055 --> 00:30:38.528 <v Speaker 3>You know, first I've got a masterclass coming up, just kind of to advertise and give you a little taste of what's coming up, but I have a three week class coming up called Power Over Pounds, and it's really where we're going to dive into the mindset around coaching, or around weight loss, and coach you through to your greatness, and I'm so excited for that. 00:30:38.528 --> 00:30:44.159 <v Speaker 3>You can check me out on Facebook at, you know, soul Amazing Coach. 00:30:44.159 --> 00:30:55.877 <v Speaker 3>You can look me up on Instagram under Soul Amazing, and I am really looking forward to connecting with anybody who is looking for a bit of transformation. 00:30:56.825 --> 00:31:01.796 <v Speaker 2>Excellent, excellent, yeah, and, and everybody you know Jody is a game changer. 00:31:01.796 --> 00:31:03.948 <v Speaker 2>So, you know, do yourself justice. 00:31:03.948 --> 00:31:07.696 <v Speaker 2>And if you're looking for any of those changes, it's in the back of your head. 00:31:07.696 --> 00:31:10.893 <v Speaker 2>You know I need to lose some pounds, but I'm tired of struggling with it. 00:31:10.893 --> 00:31:11.695 <v Speaker 2>Man, reach out. 00:31:11.695 --> 00:31:23.369 <v Speaker 2>You know, do yourself that favor, do your cheerleader that favor. 00:31:23.369 --> 00:31:23.791 <v Speaker 2>Come on, let's do it. 00:31:23.791 --> 00:31:25.740 <v Speaker 2>So I just want to also mention, on the top right hand corner, there, there's a blue QR code. 00:31:25.740 --> 00:31:26.442 <v Speaker 2>It's for resources for veterans. 00:31:26.442 --> 00:31:27.788 <v Speaker 2>There's some eBooks that I've written. 00:31:27.788 --> 00:31:33.666 <v Speaker 2>There's Facebook pages, groups that we have just for families and just for veterans. 00:31:33.666 --> 00:31:35.534 <v Speaker 2>You know, reach out, don't be silent. 00:31:35.534 --> 00:31:39.756 <v Speaker 2>If you're struggling with something, reach out, come to that loving family that's there for you. 00:31:39.756 --> 00:31:45.196 <v Speaker 2>So it's also, if you're listening to this on the podcast forums, it's empowerperformancestrategiescom. 00:31:45.196 --> 00:31:47.690 <v Speaker 2>So again, don't just sit in it. 00:31:47.690 --> 00:31:50.017 <v Speaker 2>Reach out, make a change, take an action. 00:31:50.017 --> 00:31:52.872 <v Speaker 2>So, all right, we're at the end of the show. 00:31:53.272 --> 00:32:04.208 <v Speaker 3>Here's the biggest part, jodi three tips for veterans and their families to move them further faster. 00:32:04.208 --> 00:32:10.178 <v Speaker 3>Three tips Observe what you think and really pay attention to that, and then love yourself as you are thinking it. 00:32:10.178 --> 00:32:11.747 <v Speaker 3>Don't beat yourself up. 00:32:11.747 --> 00:32:14.698 <v Speaker 3>Honor the thoughts and allow yourself to really connect to what you are thinking it. 00:32:14.698 --> 00:32:15.199 <v Speaker 3>Don't beat yourself up. 00:32:15.199 --> 00:32:30.297 <v Speaker 3>Honor the thoughts and allow yourself to really connect to what you are thinking and why you are thinking it, and then celebrate everything, because if you are not having fun, you're going to be miserable, and nobody wants a miserable life. 00:32:30.497 --> 00:32:32.888 <v Speaker 3>We want you to have a soul, amazing life. 00:32:33.590 --> 00:32:34.051 <v Speaker 2>I love it. 00:32:34.051 --> 00:32:34.492 <v Speaker 2>I love it. 00:32:34.492 --> 00:32:35.895 <v Speaker 2>Thank you so much, jodi. 00:32:35.895 --> 00:32:36.758 <v Speaker 2>You've been amazing. 00:32:36.758 --> 00:32:43.785 <v Speaker 2>Just just again want to want to thank you and honestly, you know, time is the most important resource we all have as humans. 00:32:43.785 --> 00:32:50.854 <v Speaker 2>We don't get it back and thank you truly for spending the time with me and and all the people that are going to listen to this now. 00:32:50.874 --> 00:32:51.415 <v Speaker 3>My pleasure. 00:32:56.409 --> 00:33:00.605 <v Speaker 1>All right everybody we are out of here. 00:33:00.605 --> 00:33:06.393 <v Speaker 1>Thank you for joining us on another insightful journey of your Thoughts, your Reality podcast with your host, Michael Cole. 00:33:06.393 --> 00:33:10.029 <v Speaker 1>We hope the conversation sparked some thoughts that resonate with you. 00:33:10.029 --> 00:33:16.872 <v Speaker 1>To dive deeper into empowering your thoughts and enhancing your reality, visit empowerperformancestrategiescom that resonate with you. 00:33:16.872 --> 00:33:21.160 <v Speaker 1>To dive deeper into empowering your thoughts and enhancing your reality, visit empowerperformancestrategiescom. 00:33:21.160 --> 00:33:24.065 <v Speaker 1>Remember, your thoughts shape your reality, so make them count. 00:33:24.065 --> 00:33:26.673 <v Speaker 1>Until next time, stay inspired and keep creating the reality you desire. 00:33:26.673 --> 00:33:28.411 <v Speaker 1>Catch you on the next episode.