Parental Problems | Golden Hour

00:00:07
Speaker 1: Welcome back everybody to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour. Thank you so much for joining us again this week, and we are so excited to be back. Hey, Kathy, you're looking good.

00:00:16
Speaker 2: Thanks, Susan, so are you. How are you doing today? Good? Good good good good good. Okay, Well, if you haven't done it yet, I know you have, Susan, but the rest of you, if you haven't done it, now is the time to follow our podcast so you never miss an episode. Just search for Bachelor Happy Hour in the podcast app and hit the follow button.

00:00:34
Speaker 1: And it's super important that you follow the podcast so you get notified every time there's a new episode and you don't want to miss it. Also, while you're there, write us a review. You know, Kathy, I've been receiving emails about our podcast. I love it, but I just wish they'd write in so we can say it.

00:00:52
Speaker 2: On their Okay, folks, right in and make sure to check out all of our past episodes. We have been having a blast talking to your faves and answering all your questions, so keep them coming at Bachelor nation dot com slash Golden Hour.

00:01:08
Speaker 1: Do you memorize that one cat? Don't we say that a lot.

00:01:11
Speaker 2: I got it all right.

00:01:12
Speaker 1: Now let's get started with our favorite part, the question of the day. All right, when do you stop parenting your kids?

00:01:23
Speaker 2: Or do you ever?

00:01:25
Speaker 1: For example, does parenting ever really end or does it just change over time?

00:01:31
Speaker 2: What do you think? Well, I really don't have time to do this podcast today because I have to go take care of my adult children. I don't think you ever stop parenting. I do think it looks a little bit different. I'm more of when my kids come to me as an advisor giving them my thoughts. I really try so hard not to interject what I think unless I'm asked. You know, don't say anything unless you're asked. What about you?

00:01:59
Speaker 1: I have changed one hundred thousand percent have changed because I'll bite my tongue when they say, you know you should. I thought you're raising your family. You do it your way, Kathy, I gotta tell you, I don't agree a lot of times.

00:02:15
Speaker 2: Oh sweety, you and I share my two year old granddaughter. They're raising her to be a terrorist. That's because she's two, that's all. I hope to God you're right. I will say I have matured as a parent. I do not call my children every night and tell them to brush their teeth.

00:02:33
Speaker 1: O God, no, no, or tell them how to keep their homes.

00:02:37
Speaker 2: Or clean their rooms or I mean, I don't know. I was the kind of parent that I was. I don't want to call myself a helicopter mom, but I had and I bet you were the same. I had certain rules, like their rooms had to be cleaned, they had to do their homework, they had to put their clothes away, and so that was parenting when they were younger. Now you know, little it's little problems, big kids, big problems. Right, So when my kids come to me now, it's it's usually a bigger sort of life issue. Does that make sense? Yes, it is.

00:03:11
Speaker 1: And the only thing I might still give some advice is financial advice. I want to teach them what I missed and how important it is to put money away and how you know, like my son and my one son and my daughter in law. God forbid, I hate even saying this out that when they lost their child, it was almost six years ago, but they had a lawsuit that was settled and they're living very comfortably. They decided not to move and they put so much money in their house. It looks absolutely beautiful. But and I go, Chris, I'm saying half of that should have been a vested mom. I have X amount of dollars, I said, no, no, no, no, With what you had, you better put a lot more.

00:03:54
Speaker 2: They got new cars, and I get it, but I mean it's really I think I think raising kids like, did you give your kids an allowance? Because when I parented my kids, they got I think they started when they were maybe nine or ten, and I gave them their age in money, so ten they got ten dollars a week. Which well, but here's the thing. If they wanted to go to the movies with their friend, like, they had to learn to budget. And I made them. You know, back in those days we took them to church every Sunday, they had to put money in their money in the collection. Right, that's good. Well, and here I say, colleg I just wanted them. But I will tell you my kids are not. I mean, they all work hard, but I think money is probably as you and I've talked, money can be the root of all evil. Oh wait, that's another show. But money is tough, I mean, and I think our kids have a hard time learning those lessons. So parenting like that, I don't think of it as parenting. I think of it more like were their friends were more than their friends. But we're not parenting in the traditional sense of the word. You know, telling them what to do and they have to work right.

00:05:14
Speaker 1: When they come to us.

00:05:15
Speaker 2: Yeah, I always do that, but you.

00:05:18
Speaker 1: Can't tell them what to do now they're adults. I cannot believe my babies. Kathy turned thirty seven and my daughter next month in ten days or.

00:05:28
Speaker 2: She's going to be forty years old. How is that even possible? I don't know. My oldest just turned last week, turned forty four. So you know, crimea Riverses and I got, I got, I can't. I mean I remember being that age. But whatever. You know what I'm afraid of, it's not part of the question of the day, but what the heck. You know what I'm worried about is when we get old, which I'm never getting old. Let's just start there. But you know, when the tables sort of flip and our kids sort of start paring want to do like mom, Like my kids already saying, Mom, don't get on that ladder. You know you don't need to break another leg. I mean, that's gonna happen one of these days where I.

00:06:10
Speaker 1: Think it's already begun. That Christ said a couple of things to me, Mom, you should.

00:06:14
Speaker 2: Go whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm not there yet. Well that's the problem, since and you and I are never going to be there. You and I we're going to move to some great place and raise hell wherever we are, they're going to go. I don't care. I'm done eighty eight. I'm going to raise l I don't care. That's about living. You know, that's right.

00:06:34
Speaker 1: And you're right our parent. And even with my grandchildren, yeah, I don't reprimand them as often as I did my own children. And I think that's a given because we're grandmoms. But I will tell them what's not, what's wrong.

00:06:49
Speaker 2: Yeah, you don't do that. Well, my children are perfect. I don't have to tell them. I'll let this slide, all right. And I make them money. You know you need the money? Yes, And Stella give her money and she goes, look, mommy, what is Stella? She's what you're gonna do with money? Putting a bank account for Susan, putting.

00:07:10
Speaker 1: And then my older ones, my teenage was like, Mimi, can I have a twenty. Back in my day, it was a dollar was a lot fifty cents.

00:07:19
Speaker 2: The tooth fairy. Now yeah, I mean you can buy a car with what the tooth fairy needs for a bowler. All right, let's move into our advice portion of the day. I'm gonna be the first one. Okay, okay, all right, here we go. This one is from Brianna. She's forty two from Seattle. Hi, golden ladies. I've been a loyal listener since the very beginning, and now I find myself needing some of your wisdom. Well, thanks for listening, Brianna. Okay, I'm struggling with my relationship with my mother in law. Oh, here we go. To put it simply, she just doesn't like me no matter what I do. It feels like she's always searching for something to hold against me. While this tension hasn't damaged my marriage, thankfully, my partner and I are solid, it is starting to wear me down right now. She's even refusing to speak to my spouse, and I can't help but feel responsible, even though we both know the issues aren't really about me. We've tried to work on this through therapy, but she refuses to participate, take accountability, or get help for her part in the dynamic that leaves us feeling stuck. We have a family get together and we're in this for the long haul. But so is she. My husband loves his mom and wants a relationship with her. I'm at a loss for how to handle the situation in a way that preserves my sanity and keeps the peace. How can we move forward when the dynamic feels this toxic and unfixable? Appreciate your help and love you too. Wow. Let me just tell you. I've never reme met Brianna, but since I lived Brihanna's life, let me tell you what's going on. Everything is a problem, and everything is Brianna's problem. The food's cooked wrong, their vacations are in the wrong place, They don't spend enough time with their mother in law. She stole her mother in law's son. I mean, how long do you want me to go on?

00:09:21
Speaker 1: It?

00:09:22
Speaker 2: Literally is Brianna can do nothing right. That's what the deal is. And there's some sort of Oedipus complex going on here where you know, the mom just can't let oversun So, what's your advice to her? Susan?

00:09:37
Speaker 1: You know, Kathy, I couldn't help but think it's you every time. But as you said, it could be anything she does. Maybe she just doesn't care for her. And that brings up what we talked about a few weeks ago. You try only for so long for your family's sake, for your husband's sake, And then if it were me, I would get to the point, well, well, you know you can't respect me. I'm not.

00:10:04
Speaker 2: Here's the thing. You don't want it to become a wedge between you and your spouse, right or your partner or whoever. You don't. But here's the thing. If if the mom, and it's usually the mom, has a jealousy, you know, you don't know what's going on in her life. Maybe her marriage isn't great, maybe she doesn't maybe she feels like you should move closer to her. You know, you don't know what's going through her head. But what you do know and the fact is she doesn't like you. And I knew my mother in law she would. She would, she would vacillate, she would say, oh, no, I really like you, but only when my husband would go to her faith, well yes, and when he said, mom, I'll never forget Susan. They my mother in law actually like me a little bit better off and on than my father in law. But again my father in law, they just they grew up very different to different culture. They grew up in farm towns. I grew up. Ask you a question, did you try in the beginning, like I did? You have no idea how much I did for my mother in law really, and when my father in law died, I did even work. But here's what I will say. My husband said to his mother and his father one time when I got really upset because I had it, you know, up to here, and Darryl said, Mom, Dad, we've been married whatever it was at the time, we've been married thirty five years. Do you think it stood the test of time. Can you get on board? Well, of course they never could. So my advice to Brianna is she may or may not get on board, but a don't let it come between you and your husband. Be polite when you see her. You know, if you're at a birthday party, if your kids, it's your child's birthday party, for example, tell her how glad you are to see her. You know that it's going to make your child because after a while you're not going to get no, no, no. But if you say, look, we're so glad you're here for Johnny's birthday, Yeah, thank you for coming. God, thank you for coming. And all you can do is be polite, because being polite never goes out of style.

00:12:13
Speaker 1: I want to go off course just for a second. Did you happen to watch The Hunting Wives?

00:12:19
Speaker 2: No, I don't watch it.

00:12:20
Speaker 1: You talk about a mother in law atached to her son like it was eery.

00:12:25
Speaker 2: But that's the point. This is not Brionna. I hate to say this to you. You are not alone in this. I mean, this is a very common issue. Uh, it just is, and I don't The only advice I can give you is be kind to her. Ultimately your right, Susan, I did give up, but but I gave up the last two years of her life. I mean, I just pray for patience for her. You know, I think that the therapy, by the way, is a good idea. And even if she refuses to go to therapy, Brianna, you go go with your partner because for your relationship, because at the end of the day, your child, your relationship with your spouse or partner is the most important.

00:13:16
Speaker 1: One and it's her family. Now you know, right, that's his family, but it's her family.

00:13:21
Speaker 2: It's hurtful, though, it's hurtful.

00:13:23
Speaker 1: Oh gosh, I know, and you know what, Thank you Brianna for writing into us.

00:13:27
Speaker 2: And we're really curious.

00:13:28
Speaker 1: If you get a milestone and succeed, please tell us that we could tell the world.

00:13:33
Speaker 2: Yes, let us know, let us know, and you know, just keep trying to do those family events as much as you can. And by the way, if none of that works, take a swig of vodka before she comes.

00:13:43
Speaker 1: Okay, let's move on. This one is from Melissa and she is sixty four years young from Oxner. Hi, Kathy, and Susan. I have a question for you. I first noticed this in my thirties and now again in my sixties. What do we do when the roles reverse and we find ourselves parenting our parents?

00:14:08
Speaker 2: Oh my goodness.

00:14:09
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm in my sixties and my dad is in his nineties.

00:14:12
Speaker 2: God bless him. Is he single?

00:14:15
Speaker 1: He's had several falls recently, but he refuses to use a walker and absolutely won't consider moving into an independent living facility, even though it would give him community care and resources. I've flown across the country multiple times to visit facilities with him, and they're truly wonderful, but he won't budge. It feels like I'm dealing with a defiant, stubborn toddler, and I'm the one who has to make the adult decisions. I'm constantly worried about him, and I don't know how to convince him that it is time.

00:14:53
Speaker 2: How do you.

00:14:53
Speaker 1: Navigate this stage of life with love without losing your sanity? I adore you both, and I love podcast Melissa.

00:15:01
Speaker 2: Thank you all. Can I just pick it? I can give this answer. She's not gonna like it, Melissa, but I dealt with this with my stepmom, who died a few years ago at ninety six. I feel your pain. But here's the simple answer, Melissa. Unless you have him declared incompetent, which he doesn't sound like he is, there's nothing you can do but do what you're doing, because he has the right to wither away fall every day unless unless he breaks a bone and a doctor says you cannot go home unless you have twenty four hour care, then you're going to get your wish and he'll be in long term care. But other than that, Unfortunately, we as senior citizens, have the right to make our own choices.

00:15:49
Speaker 1: Yes, and I couldn't agree with you more And unfortunately, and this might sound harsh, but if that's the way he chooses to go out, let it.

00:15:58
Speaker 2: Let it be.

00:15:59
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, you cannot control that. But I get what she's saying. How we were parents and that we're parenting.

00:16:05
Speaker 2: Are That's what I said earlier, right, we were talking about then the question of the day. It's so hard and Melissa to watch a vibrant person, your dad, who you know, carried you around, put you on his shoulders, and now is having trouble standing. I don't mean to sound insensitive. It's awful, but the fact as we get older.

00:16:24
Speaker 1: Yeah, and my kids we had a conversation the other day on their birthday dinner. They said, listen, don't put me away. There'll be no inheritance left. That costs a lot of money. Just give me a cocktail, make.

00:16:36
Speaker 2: Me go to sleep, mom, Mom, we'll go to jail.

00:16:39
Speaker 1: I was like, no, seriously, I don't.

00:16:41
Speaker 2: That's not my plan.

00:16:43
Speaker 1: Some people plan for that. What she's talking about is not an old folks home, it's independent living. It's just another place that you can still be you and do what you want. You could still have a car. You know, he's not letting go of his home, so you know.

00:17:01
Speaker 2: What, I don't. I have to be honest, Susan. I've already told my kids there's going to be one dollar and ninety six cents left checking no, because I'm not going to go in. And my kids are always joking saying, oh, come on, mom, you'll be the life of the party. You'll be You'll be decorating for all the parties, You'll be doing the dancing. I'm like, nope. You know what my fears, Kathy.

00:17:23
Speaker 1: They're all old people in there, and I'm not old.

00:17:28
Speaker 2: They don't think they're old either, Susan. They're want to surround myself with younger people and keep on moving. But that's why you're paying Melissa. Well, let us know, Melissa. But and I know, I know it's hard. It's just one of those things. The way you navigate it is you love him, you check on him, you do what you can do, and then you have to let it go and and just you know, let.

00:17:48
Speaker 1: They don't want him to resent her for constantly trying to move him. You know, keep that relationship healthy with your dad. I know you think it's better, and it probably is.

00:17:57
Speaker 2: But if that's the way he chooses, that's what. Yeah. Also, I would say she's flown across the country multiple times. Think of the miles you're stacking up, Molesnia so you can be able to take a vacation. I mean, look for the positive in this issue. Moving let us know that. Good luck. Okay, This one is from Chris. Hi. My name is Chris. My wife and I have been married for ten years. We have three kids, and overall we share a really wonderful marriage. The only ongoing challenge we face is her parents. She's incredibly close to them, which I love, but at times it feels like the boundaries between our marriage and her family aren't very clear. They often stop by unannounced, and since my wife gave them keys to our house, I sometimes come home to find them just hanging out. Once I even came home to my mother in law opening my mail on a top that when my wife was pregnant, she told her parents before she told me, and that really stung. I love how much she values her relationship with them, but I also want to feel like i'm the number one person in her life. Do you have any advice on how to set healthier boundaries without damaging their closeness? Oh? Hell yeah I do. Oh God.

00:19:21
Speaker 1: First of all, you're not going to damage their closeness. They are close, but that's your house, and you kindly and respectfully ask your in laws let me know when you're coming. I could be coming down the stairs in a towel or naked for that matter. I can't have you walking in unexpected.

00:19:42
Speaker 2: I think I would handle it a little bit differently, shocker, I would. I think I would talk to my wife or my case, my first, and but I would. I would. I would give the positive first. You know, I love how close you are with parents. I love having them so close to us. But I am struggling and it doesn't work for me. And I would say to her, if I were you, Chris, I would say, it's very hurtful to me that you know you tell your parents things before me. We are a marriage, we have a bond. I love that you're close to their family, but there's some changes that need to be made, and that's called establishing healthy boundaries. So the first boundary would be that communication. Like we always say, right, but I'm saying. The first boundary that Chris, that you're gonna have to set because your wife isn't going to do it, is they must call before coming, and that your wife must talk to you before she has them over, so that you're not coming home when you're tired, you just want to put your feet up, and you found the table set for four and you're in laws with.

00:20:55
Speaker 1: Him walking and opening his mail.

00:20:58
Speaker 2: Excuse me, but I would say that to the wife if you can't see, if I were Chris, if you cannot see that this is wrong, so I am, I would say, I'm going to talk to your parents about opening my mail. I'm going to talk to them about these things. But I want you to work with me because we're a team. In other words, he asked, Chris, you have to have buy in from your wife.

00:21:22
Speaker 1: She's obviously blind to it because she's so used to her parents and being that comfortable. Maybe her parents opened her mail.

00:21:29
Speaker 2: I don't know, but that's a big taboo. That is huge, and you're right.

00:21:33
Speaker 1: Talk to your wife first and so she understands where you're coming from, and do it with tons of respect. Tell them how much you love them, and that at they're welcome there anytime.

00:21:44
Speaker 2: However, no, no, no, you can't say you're welcome anytime. We love seeing you, but please do not come any longer unannounced, And you know what, Christy might get their feelings hurt, you know what.

00:21:59
Speaker 1: And hug them and say, I'm not trying to hurt your feelings, babe. You can come anytime you want, just let me know first.

00:22:04
Speaker 2: Because Susan I may hear me. That's not what he wants to say, because he may not want them there anytime. In other words, play this out with me. I called and go hey, Chris, you know, hey, Susie whatever her name is, we'll be over in five minutes. And then Chris is like, no, I want to sit in my skivvies and chug beers tonight. I don't want your parents here.

00:22:26
Speaker 1: But he's given them. She's they're announcing that they're coming in five minutes, and you instantly say it's not a good times that would be his.

00:22:37
Speaker 2: So the boundaries are you wait for an invitations, You wait for an invitation, you never open my mail, and they're going to be hurt, Chris. But you got to get buy in from your wife because you guys are a team. All these questions today sort of relate have similar underline theme, which is whether you're married, partners, whatever, you're together for each other and you have to come first with each other.

00:23:02
Speaker 1: Chris, you love your wife, obviously, you have a great, solid marriage, so you do need to get her to understand where you're coming from, what it looks like from your point of view. And once she gets that, I'm sure it's going to work out.

00:23:16
Speaker 2: But listen, let us know, impress it and be kind. Yes, And Chris, if your in laws are listening and there's any big checks in the mail, send them to me. We'll split it all right, let's get it's game was well, Kathy? How about today? Though?

00:23:34
Speaker 1: All three of them was about parenting or us becoming parents to our parents and in law issues. And I can't tell you there's probably millions of people in the world that deal with this.

00:23:46
Speaker 2: It's so sad, I know. And this is why the game we should be playing today is drink or dare because that topic.

00:23:58
Speaker 1: We're going to play around them icky or picky or both about parenting and dating. We'll switch off reading the ick and we'll say if we agree or if we think it's just picky, I'll start us off. But wait, didn't we add another word? Or okay, his parents and or kids pop in unannounced.

00:24:25
Speaker 2: I'm telling you that's new to me. I say, Picky, pick, why do we just talked about the question? I know?

00:24:35
Speaker 1: And you think it's never bothered me? And if they walk in on me doing something they don't approve of, Oh well.

00:24:44
Speaker 2: Wow, okay, Well I thought I thought we were on the same page that he really had to talk to us. Well, but you're saying you wouldn't care.

00:24:53
Speaker 1: I mean unless it got monotonous.

00:24:55
Speaker 2: I mean to the point where yo.

00:24:57
Speaker 1: But for me, I am who I am. And if you you come in and you're not going to be happy with whatever it is I might be doing, or hell I'm dressed or whatever, then maybe you'll think twice before you do it.

00:25:08
Speaker 2: Agin Oh Susan, Okay, well, we can't belabor this, but I'm just telling you. If my husband and I are sitting down, I forgot what that feels like. But if we're just sitting down watching a movie with popcorn and my in laws popped in or my grown children popping in, I would.

00:25:24
Speaker 1: Say children can come popping in.

00:25:28
Speaker 2: I never pop into my children's home. I always call first, always, and I, by the way, by the way, I have key to my children's home. And I never ever walk in unannounced. And by that that's how someone still walks announced. Oh god, all right, we're moving on here. Here's the next one. Oh, his adult kids live with him. To me, that all depends in good situation. The situation I can't answer, icky, picky, Or it might be I might have a big heart on my sleeve for the child. It just all depends on his situation. They could be going through something.

00:26:06
Speaker 1: But if it's one that they never moved out, yeah, that would definitely be an ick.

00:26:12
Speaker 2: That would be an Oh my goodness.

00:26:14
Speaker 1: Wait to hear the next one. He gives his adult kids an allowance.

00:26:20
Speaker 2: Do you see my face? Susan secret ballot?

00:26:26
Speaker 1: If you want to give your kids money, give them one lump sum and say you go, we're done here.

00:26:31
Speaker 2: Yeah, And that's that's just okay, okay, okay, I'm sorry. I can't even say this from the straight. Oh my god. He went with his kids on their honeymoon. Ew Listen, you know what. While he's on the honeymoon with them, you know where I am in the lawyer's office filing for divorce. Oh my god, it does, all right.

00:26:56
Speaker 1: A guy who wants to get matching couple's tattoos with you?

00:27:03
Speaker 2: Oh no, if uh, well it depends if if I'm tattoos, well that I don't either. But if I did, it's a sweet thing. It's sweet thing. I don't think it's taking picky. Yeah, maybe that's just picky. Yeah, okay, we'll go with that. All right. He's really into he's really into baby talking us little baby voices. I don't know what I would do. I probably cracked up in a space. What the hell are you doing?

00:27:30
Speaker 1: I mean, you know that is a picky because maybe some women turned.

00:27:37
Speaker 2: I mean like if he says, look, sweetie pie, I worn't the Jaguar dealer, and I'm gonna buy you that pear exactly. I'm gonna give a baby talk right back. Perfect, let's go. Okay.

00:27:48
Speaker 1: Some who sends someone who sends a good morning and a good night text every single day?

00:27:55
Speaker 2: I love I love it. I love it. Please, we're moving. I think it should okay. Uh.

00:28:05
Speaker 1: Couples who over wait, wait, you didn't say anything.

00:28:08
Speaker 2: What's your choice there? You don't like it? I think it's I think it's picky. I mean, I listen, I think anything. If it's rote, if every day I texted you Susan said good morning, and every day I text you said good night, it's like, you know, it would lose.

00:28:24
Speaker 1: You're not my boyfriend, though.

00:28:27
Speaker 2: And thankfully I'm not. I'm just saying. It doesn't say and bother you like, no, no, no, it doesn't say a boyfriend. It says someone who sends a good morning. Assume all right, great, guess what somebody you.

00:28:41
Speaker 1: Were dating, Kathy and they sent you a good morning every morning, I know, or a good night or sleep well, that would be.

00:28:49
Speaker 2: It'd be fine if I were in a serious relationship. But if it's just a guy I'm dating, no, I don't want to hear from you every day. Okay. Couples who overshare on social media share fights, lots of PDA, which is public displays of affection, et cetera.

00:29:05
Speaker 1: What do you think, ikey, I wouldn't share a fight on social media, that would.

00:29:13
Speaker 2: I think it's I I think I just think that we are sharing too much on social media.

00:29:19
Speaker 1: Sleeping in separate bedrooms from your partner only be as the flu or that.

00:29:26
Speaker 2: Snoring is just beyond like that.

00:29:29
Speaker 1: That depends, no, because as people age, I know a lot of people that have their own rooms now like older people.

00:29:37
Speaker 2: But a snoring thing. No, I mean, obviously I'm my own bedroom right now, but I could see it if they were sick or on the occasional night if I had to get up really early or something like that. But to maintain a separate bedroom, I like to put my cold feet on their back to warm up in the winter.

00:29:54
Speaker 1: That would be, I guess, a picky one. That depends on the individual. I don't know.

00:29:58
Speaker 2: Ye all right wants to wear matching out.

00:30:02
Speaker 1: Okay, that is just icky, that's just hysterical. I know, Fred, when we're going out dancing, all the darling, what color are you wearing?

00:30:14
Speaker 2: Because he wants to blend with its so cute. But can I just tell you on Paradise, all the couples, that is so funny you said that they of course, no, no, no, I was slow to the game. Like they'd come out and you know they Jess would have on a blue dress and and and Spencer would have on like a blue of my shirt. And about the third time it happened when they were in the same color. I went, what do you two have like telephones in your room? And they went like, oh, no, we talk about it. We want to make sure we're mac hunt And I'm looking at Keith and me. You know, I'm in green, he's in red, he's in copper, I'm in black. I was like, okay, whatever, all right. He wants to have your location. Oh, this is an interesting one, suasan. He wants to have your location and constantly checks it, asking about where you are. No, I can't do that. Where you are.

00:31:07
Speaker 1: You can see my location because I don't have anything to hide. But if you're going to question it, that's.

00:31:11
Speaker 2: A big ick. I would agree with you. That is a huge if he's going to question.

00:31:16
Speaker 1: It, he proposes without a ring and instead just a promise. Well, that''s not a proposal, you tell Dicky proposed, kid, you not walking down the beach at sunset in Miami, I mean in Mallie. And he's like, isn't this beautiful?

00:31:35
Speaker 2: What's your other proposal on the beach in Miami. No?

00:31:38
Speaker 1: No, And I'll go, oh my gosh, it is And he goes, you know, if I ever got married, this is where I'd want to do it, and I go, yeah, how about that? This would be absolutely beautiful? And I just kept walking. We were quiet, and he goes, well, I said, well, what well?

00:31:54
Speaker 2: I just that was a proposal. Do you have a ring? Did you say that? Yes? He goes no, we could go to the diamond guy and that we would get one mad. I was like, oh my god, that's it. You didn't get down on one knee. I didn't surprise with a box. I can't wait to see. You should have known that marriage was no, no rain man, not down on one knee. I don't think that's a your picky again. You know, maybe you want to take your shopping for the ring. Who knows he keeps his promise. Okay, this one, I'm just going to say. I'm going to answer what my before I read it, it's beyond oo. It's kick him to the curb. It's alimony, child support and taking eighty percent of every dime he has. Go ahead, read it.

00:32:41
Speaker 1: He shares all of our bedroom details with his friends, being plural.

00:32:47
Speaker 2: That right there gave you a nick. No, I just told you it's so beyond it for Kathy. Oh no, I told you it's kick him to the Curby. He'll be living in the tent when I'm done with him. Oh my god, I love it. All right, Well, this was fun. That was super fun. And unfortunately, Susan, the fun is come to an end. This will wait, do it. I'm just happy that neither one of us have mother in Lawles, that's true, and you're closer to one than I am. You're closer to getting one than I am. All right, That does it for this episode of Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour. It was so much fun.

00:33:21
Speaker 1: Thanks so much for joining us today. We love hearing from you. We love doing this for you. And make sure you follow Bachelor Happy Hour as we have new episodes coming.

00:33:30
Speaker 2: Out every week and you don't want to miss them, and make sure you submit your questions to us. You can go to Bachelor nation dot com, slash Golden Hour, or hit us up on social at Bachelor Happy Hour.

00:33:41
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00:33:49
Speaker 2: See you next time. Take care,