BONUS: Let’s Play The Christmas Family Feud (with Food Fights)!

00:00:05
Speaker 1: Hello, gorgeous, Welcome to the bonus episode of the Give Them All Up Podcast. Because there were so many people that wrote in about their Christmas beauting, I thought we gotta go into a bonus because they're actually really funny. And I think they're funny because I've created like the scenario in my mind. Yeah, kind of like the uncle who threw the full turkey at the tree.

00:00:31
Speaker 2: You know, I hope there weren't glass ornaments on it. That's what I was thinking. They're all shattering.

00:00:35
Speaker 3: I would be worried about being fed to clean up the mess, like.

00:00:39
Speaker 4: I feel like that.

00:00:41
Speaker 1: I would be watching Christmas Vacation and the grandpa lights his cigar and blows up the whole tree. Yes, yeah, the little lights aren't twinkling. He worked really hard, Grandma or Grandpa washing.

00:00:59
Speaker 5: Machine, you guys know, verbatim every you know, Dad knew the entire Chevy Chase rant he did where he's like, Hellelujah, holy.

00:01:11
Speaker 6: Ship, where's the sounds like you.

00:01:17
Speaker 3: Like he could do it.

00:01:18
Speaker 1: Verb brainless, dickless headed like he knew the whole rant.

00:01:23
Speaker 4: I think that's because how he felt.

00:01:25
Speaker 6: And you know, Chevy, you know that was ab lipped.

00:01:28
Speaker 3: It had to you can't.

00:01:30
Speaker 7: Yeah, you can't read that, and then go, okay, let me re say it like you just gotta go.

00:01:36
Speaker 1: You just have to like go for it and make incredible. I mean still to this day it's the greatest Christmas movie.

00:01:43
Speaker 4: Of all time.

00:01:43
Speaker 3: Oh it is, for sure in my opinion.

00:01:45
Speaker 1: In my opinion as well. But as we've learned, my opinions are facts, so are my feelings.

00:01:52
Speaker 4: Oh God, just kidding you guys, really not. But I have learned that when I am the wrong.

00:02:00
Speaker 1: Like the other day, you guys told me and I it was in Hawaii, and I was like losing it, and you guys told me that I was being not very nice, and I said, you just need to take it and you go to know, and I was like, I know that how I'm feeling. It's not I know, it's my fault. I know I'm incorrect, but you just have to take it.

00:02:20
Speaker 2: Well, it was about the keys, the dumb keys, I know, and you were so worried.

00:02:24
Speaker 3: Well with the tsunami comes, It's like I promise you that.

00:02:28
Speaker 1: Well, we spent all of our Hawaiian vacation watching tsunami movies and documentaries. So yes, I was very concerned, and I said to you, guys, the key is not in the basket. And I've told you multiple times that should we hear the tsunami alarm, the keys need to be there so that we can implement the plan that we so.

00:02:47
Speaker 4: Carefully thought out.

00:02:49
Speaker 1: I grab Sosa, Lisa is in charge of getting Ocean into the car.

00:02:53
Speaker 4: No one needs to be buckled in.

00:02:55
Speaker 1: Easton can grab the keys, and we're off to the races, getting up to uh, the mountain of where food Land is. And I go to get the keys and they're not there. Should if there would have been warning they were in the car.

00:03:10
Speaker 4: But it doesn't matter. We would have spent hours trying to find them, hours.

00:03:13
Speaker 7: Trying to find them. We're lucky we weren't spending hours trying to find the car. Scoot scoot gone, car gone. Holy shit, we would have been fucked.

00:03:23
Speaker 3: Your hair looks fine, No it doesn't.

00:03:25
Speaker 4: I can see all these like little hair.

00:03:27
Speaker 3: And days get hard. It is what it is, life.

00:03:29
Speaker 4: Life's I didn't even think about it being stolen.

00:03:34
Speaker 3: Oh that was my first thing.

00:03:35
Speaker 7: When you were like they were in the car, I was like, I'm not even gonna say anything, but thank god, the car was there because they could have.

00:03:40
Speaker 3: Jumped the fence.

00:03:45
Speaker 4: The car.

00:03:46
Speaker 3: A car is a car, and I'm going to tell you those cars.

00:03:48
Speaker 1: We're not looking for lambows on the They want the scooters.

00:03:52
Speaker 3: And whatever car my little Pronto, they'll steal the Chrysler.

00:03:57
Speaker 2: Speaking of the Pronto, I think you've come up with a grand idea. You buy another one when we go the next time, and then.

00:04:06
Speaker 3: Every year.

00:04:07
Speaker 6: Yeah.

00:04:07
Speaker 4: I think it's a genius idea.

00:04:09
Speaker 1: And what what I have learned is it doesn't need to be Christmas to have an epic feud. If you live in the Birmingham household, you're feuding every single day.

00:04:18
Speaker 6: But it's always about keys. Where are the keys?

00:04:21
Speaker 3: No, our feuds aren't like personal attacks. That's why there's no no.

00:04:27
Speaker 4: But the ones that people wrote in are definitely intense.

00:04:30
Speaker 3: Should we start, Yes, I'm ready.

00:04:32
Speaker 1: I'm just confused how so many people are down to just like throw fists.

00:04:38
Speaker 3: They're watching a lot of housewives.

00:04:40
Speaker 4: Do you think I think.

00:04:41
Speaker 1: There's there's I think there's alcohol consumed during this time of I think you're right.

00:04:46
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think a lot of egg down the hatch.

00:04:50
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, Oh Dad loved.

00:04:53
Speaker 4: You Spike his no who knows, No, don't.

00:04:57
Speaker 3: I don't know about that.

00:04:58
Speaker 6: I wasn't a big drinker then.

00:05:00
Speaker 7: Oh guess why he never spiked it because he'd always tell me to try it because he was trying.

00:05:04
Speaker 3: To push the eggnog with a bit of sprite. Oh you remember that. Yeah, you try that, and I try it was I mean it was good. I think I'd like it more now than when I was eighteen. But yeah, doing that.

00:05:18
Speaker 1: Yeah, And he also was very into during Christmas time, he started drinking red wine with a little coke in it, not cocaine, Coca cola. Yeah, you're right. That was a weird thing that he started doing.

00:05:32
Speaker 3: You know what.

00:05:32
Speaker 6: Somebody introduced him to it and he loved it.

00:05:36
Speaker 4: Yeah.

00:05:36
Speaker 1: Well, I mean it's probably the Mormon version of like, you know, it's like having a dirty soda, having.

00:05:42
Speaker 2: Dirty because you don't put a good burlow in with a coke.

00:05:47
Speaker 6: Okay.

00:05:48
Speaker 1: I know my dad well, And he could have been a billionaire or a no air at all, and he was still buying bottom shelf whatever.

00:05:55
Speaker 4: He was a big fan of the saving money.

00:05:58
Speaker 1: I would send him out to get like cold medicine, and he would always come back with this store with the store brand and make me. And I'd be like, Dad, like, why didn't you get me nay quill?

00:06:11
Speaker 4: And He's like, well there's look at the ingredients. It's the exact same but cheaper.

00:06:15
Speaker 2: And I'm alright, Well, he's the one that wants you to get a Corolla for your first car.

00:06:19
Speaker 4: He's the one that toilet paper.

00:06:23
Speaker 7: I do that, but the knockoff medications like America's bad.

00:06:28
Speaker 3: I don't know what it is.

00:06:29
Speaker 4: Who knows, but you don't.

00:06:30
Speaker 3: I'm the Kroger brand because it's great. I can't go, go go, No.

00:06:35
Speaker 2: Can I tell you my pet Peeve in Hawaii tell us the one play toilet paper.

00:06:39
Speaker 4: It's my whole entire bottom half is tore up.

00:06:44
Speaker 2: And I send Eastern to the store to get two play too far?

00:06:48
Speaker 3: What did you want me to do?

00:06:49
Speaker 1: I didn't have any No, Hawaii is a big fan of the Scott toilet paper I went to get.

00:06:55
Speaker 3: I could have got Sharman. I could have got Sharman.

00:06:59
Speaker 4: Why didn't you?

00:07:00
Speaker 7: I've gotten charmed sixteen fucking rolls for two days.

00:07:04
Speaker 3: No, we should have got it. The first table went.

00:07:08
Speaker 7: I just bought the four because they didn't have any other things. In the floor, and I thought we leave on Saturday and it's Thursday. I don't care that much about sixteen, so that I.

00:07:19
Speaker 6: Thought they only had one ply on the island.

00:07:22
Speaker 4: Okay, here we are sitting all over.

00:07:24
Speaker 6: Sorry, sorry, but they didn't.

00:07:27
Speaker 3: I mean they had one box, that was it.

00:07:30
Speaker 7: So whoever is there, it's like COVID for them, they're still buying up the toilet paper.

00:07:35
Speaker 1: You can't even make an excuse because even in Palm Springs, I sent you out to get toilet paper and you got one ply.

00:07:40
Speaker 4: And I could not believe.

00:07:42
Speaker 2: Scot is the best. So guess what he has all the Scott in his bathroom and he can enjoy.

00:07:47
Speaker 4: I wonder if Scott will sponsor the podcast.

00:07:49
Speaker 6: Now we're.

00:07:52
Speaker 4: No, but it reminded me of like going to.

00:07:54
Speaker 3: School, you know, or to the airport.

00:07:57
Speaker 4: Oh, it's the worst. This this person said.

00:08:00
Speaker 1: The family feud usually has to do it is what she said. Deciding which families to visit is always a feud, especially hard when you have divorced parents.

00:08:09
Speaker 4: That would be really hard. Here's what I.

00:08:11
Speaker 3: Think, Brandon or brother.

00:08:15
Speaker 1: He did, yes, but imagine this, It's like four Christmases because you've got you're now married, and if both sides have divorced parents, you got to have four Christmases.

00:08:26
Speaker 4: To me, I kind of like that kind of day.

00:08:30
Speaker 1: Like I always loved going to Grandma's house over Mimi's house. Don't be offended them and it has nothing to do with mem Okay, well here we go, because my mom's at Memi and Bob's. It was like fine china, crystal ware, a pristine just set.

00:08:47
Speaker 6: Up eating at nine o'clock at night.

00:08:50
Speaker 1: It was very intense for children, especially Grandma's house. We were eating out of like the ten things that you buy at the grocery store. For many people it paper plates. It was just as a kid, I enjoyed going there because there were a lot of cousins.

00:09:05
Speaker 4: Yeah, but it was a nice balance.

00:09:08
Speaker 7: I just hated getting home to play with all of my new Christmas toys, but we had family time.

00:09:15
Speaker 3: Fuck, I love it.

00:09:17
Speaker 1: I fought with my mom because she refused to acknowledge my step kids at Christmas.

00:09:22
Speaker 6: What a bitch.

00:09:23
Speaker 4: Sorry, sorry, I don't mean to call you, but what a bit.

00:09:26
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I mean I've had step kids at one point in time, and I think I would also be furious if my mother chose to just not acknowledge their presence. It's like their children, they literally have no say in the matter.

00:09:39
Speaker 3: Meanwhile, you're sleeping and she wanted to sleep over every night with you.

00:09:43
Speaker 4: Are you talking about.

00:09:46
Speaker 3: You were sleeping with righte fry.

00:09:48
Speaker 4: You were a great bonus.

00:09:50
Speaker 1: I know we still see them all the time. You were You were a fabulous bonus grandma. And that's like, that's one thing that that is is step children because you feel like it's a personal attack because.

00:10:05
Speaker 4: They the grandma thing. I don't understand.

00:10:07
Speaker 1: But becoming a step mom, you look at the way your partner looks at the children and you think, wow, this other woman.

00:10:15
Speaker 4: Gave him these kids that he will.

00:10:18
Speaker 1: Never love anything more than that, right, And when you don't have kids, you don't realize that, Like it doesn't mean he loves the ex wife. No, he just loves his children. And the kids have zero say. They just like arrived on planet Earth because you two decided to fuck each other and then not stay together.

00:10:35
Speaker 4: Make it pleasant.

00:10:36
Speaker 1: Ye acknowledge if I ever have stepchildren, it'll be such a different ballgame. And I've spoken about this, like I will have the exes back through thick and thin, because that's what I would hope for when my children take on a step person.

00:10:53
Speaker 7: If somebody you know, like step kids over, like say you did, and he brought his other kids over. I'm the type of person who is going to make the other step kids feel more at home because I want them.

00:11:07
Speaker 4: To, because you're already feeling out.

00:11:08
Speaker 3: Of like you couldn't feel more out of place.

00:11:10
Speaker 7: So I am going to step the line to make you feel so comfortable.

00:11:15
Speaker 4: You're great at that.

00:11:16
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm biting my tongue at that.

00:11:18
Speaker 2: That old bad she is called an old bag to.

00:11:23
Speaker 4: My vegan brother.

00:11:25
Speaker 1: My vegan brother sat everyone down and told us all how we were murderers.

00:11:30
Speaker 7: I was, hey, I I there is such thing as too much meat in a diet. I really do people who eat meat every day?

00:11:42
Speaker 2: You know, I don't know how people eat like a drumstick like that's the chicken leg like or.

00:11:48
Speaker 3: Wings all of that.

00:11:52
Speaker 6: I can't that but disgusting.

00:11:55
Speaker 3: But you got to enjoy it.

00:11:57
Speaker 7: You need I know we've and you have to have it in your diet because if you don't, you feel like.

00:12:04
Speaker 1: There are some vegetarians or vegans that are like you don't have to you can supplement with this, that and the other. But then there are other people on the other end who say there are specific blood types and other scientific jargon goes into it to where there are certain people who absolutely have to have some sort of meeting.

00:12:26
Speaker 3: Once a week.

00:12:27
Speaker 1: Maybe, well that's all I need, according to this vegan brother, you're a fucking murderer.

00:12:32
Speaker 3: Well I need it for my loins.

00:12:36
Speaker 1: My sister showed my boss her boobs. Haven't talked to my sister in three years now. I can read my sister show my boss her boobs and they haven't spoken in three years.

00:12:47
Speaker 6: She was probably a little tipsy, but like, what does she do?

00:12:50
Speaker 4: Like it like girls gone Wild? Is it just one t it? Like I want to know and why?

00:12:58
Speaker 1: And why were they like having a little did they go, you know, into another room and she was like, I'm going to show you my.

00:13:03
Speaker 4: Boobs now, to show you my boobs, She's.

00:13:07
Speaker 1: Like, Clark, you've been a very good boy and I'm vibing with you.

00:13:10
Speaker 3: So here are my headlights, so you get to.

00:13:12
Speaker 4: See my boobs.

00:13:14
Speaker 6: What interesting?

00:13:15
Speaker 4: It's so interesting?

00:13:16
Speaker 1: And did this woman get fired or did she get a promotion after? Because if you got promoted, you should definitely.

00:13:21
Speaker 6: Talk to your sister.

00:13:23
Speaker 3: Maybe, yeah, don't you?

00:13:24
Speaker 6: And I wondered maybe she had just gotten a new boob job or something.

00:13:27
Speaker 3: Right shut off.

00:13:28
Speaker 4: When you get a new boob job, you do want to show them off.

00:13:31
Speaker 1: My first Christmas after my parents split up in November, I was eleven, bro was eighteen. My bro had a melt down and started throwing mandarin orges against the wall.

00:13:41
Speaker 4: One hit me and I fell down the stairs.

00:13:43
Speaker 1: Oh that night my uncle also passed out, and to just wait, good times.

00:13:49
Speaker 4: Can I'll tell you what I was reminding me of.

00:13:50
Speaker 3: A picture the neighbors that you went to after a call. I picture. I don't want to say his name, but I know, picture him.

00:14:01
Speaker 1: The place I'm picturing him, and then the little kid or the brother, Oh he was eighteen throwing mans in oranges even better. But in my mind it's four Christmases after the little boy doesn't get what he wants and he starts taking off his clothes and and the mom is like, he tands to streak. When he gets up sicked, he's like throwing shit buttony ki. I'm picturing it that And then I imagine orangeting a little girl. But they played in slow mow like it's something really hard and she just ella falls down the stairs.

00:14:38
Speaker 4: These are so funny?

00:14:39
Speaker 3: Crazy or asleep at this?

00:14:41
Speaker 6: Can I tell you?

00:14:42
Speaker 2: Always tell I would have my mom's and dad's side of the family over for Christmas Eve when you guys were little. Yeah, and they would stay literally till one o'clock in the morning, having their wine and chatting.

00:14:54
Speaker 4: He's getting schnockered.

00:14:56
Speaker 6: They don't have I still had to put Sanna gifts together and.

00:15:00
Speaker 1: Out little self awareness, so rude, you know, class I'd.

00:15:04
Speaker 2: Used them, That's what I would have done. And I had to do dishes. So I'm in the kitchen doing dishes and they're all having again.

00:15:11
Speaker 7: No, no, no, no, no, you should have done things differently. Well that, but dishes. When people are doing dishes, that's not a key that the night is over. If I would have seen you starting to build shit, I'd have been like, all right, let's get out of here.

00:15:26
Speaker 3: You should have started building and then done the dishes, because dishes is like the Yeah, the night is, the dinner's over.

00:15:33
Speaker 6: But the night literally it'd be one o'clock in the morning.

00:15:35
Speaker 3: If I saw you putting together gifts, don't give you credit for what you did.

00:15:39
Speaker 2: And then I had another time where Dad had some friends over and they got schnockered.

00:15:45
Speaker 4: And it was getting schnockered three o'clock.

00:15:48
Speaker 2: In the morning, I swear to you, and you were a new baby, you were three months old. I had gone up to bed and got up to feed you and they were still downstairs.

00:15:59
Speaker 7: I don't know why you're bitching about that, like she's gonna wake up Christmas morning like rip on.

00:16:03
Speaker 3: But I remember about that.

00:16:05
Speaker 7: I know.

00:16:05
Speaker 6: No, I was getting up.

00:16:07
Speaker 3: No, the day was no.

00:16:08
Speaker 4: I mean Sosa right now. She she's up.

00:16:12
Speaker 1: And ready to go around six, six thirty and then she'll go down for a nap around eight. So yeah, no, that's I would be exhausted.

00:16:21
Speaker 6: You know what.

00:16:22
Speaker 4: Let's take this moment to say things.

00:16:23
Speaker 1: Thank you putting on such a fantastic Christmas time for us.

00:16:27
Speaker 3: You really did come. Loved Christmas.

00:16:30
Speaker 7: I had sit on the stairs with the French doors closed, yeah, so I.

00:16:35
Speaker 2: Could get my video camera house so I could film you guys seeing your gifts.

00:16:38
Speaker 3: Yeah.

00:16:39
Speaker 6: Yeah, it was great. It was very and I love decorating. I love the whole thing, but.

00:16:43
Speaker 1: Not only like of course, the gifts were really fun as a kid, and like they were so spectacular that I always thought Santa Claus was real because I thought, how could he not be? But not only did you and Dad provide that, but you also provided the feeling of Christmas.

00:16:58
Speaker 3: That's the one thing, like the feeling of it.

00:17:01
Speaker 7: You every Christmas I can remember, thus waking them up, sitting on the stairs where Santa eight days and milk, yeah, and then me and you're just sitting there and thank you for you need some praise on this too, because your experience was ruined well before mine, and you did very well to make me still believe.

00:17:23
Speaker 3: So very good on you. I don't think you get enough crisic. Well, thank you so.

00:17:26
Speaker 7: But yeah, like walking through the two French doors as moms backing up.

00:17:31
Speaker 3: The gifts are all great, but after that.

00:17:34
Speaker 7: One point of walking through, I forget everything because everything was so chaotic after that. But I remember every Christmas like just walking down and like doing that and that experience.

00:17:44
Speaker 1: I think that's what's I think it's really important to also, and I know that Christmas is now considered a commercial holiday, which is it's fine, It's not really what I would prefer for me It's much more sentimental than that and why we celebrate.

00:17:57
Speaker 4: I'm not religious, I'm spiritual.

00:17:58
Speaker 1: But for me, it was the feeling of Christmas time rolling around that I've been able to carry with me through. Okay, Santa is not real anymore, but it didn't matter, because that wasn't what made Christmas special to me. It was like the feeling that you and Dad provided and the traditions that we did. That's what I hope to have with Sosa and Ocean that well, beyond finding out that you know, Sanna is not real and just gifts are being given for who the fuck knows.

00:18:24
Speaker 4: Why, right, Because the other thing feeling.

00:18:26
Speaker 7: Elmer like that is the other thing I could. I don't know what the fuck I got, but there were times where like he would leave me a sucker, but it was just like, I mean, I got amazing things, but it was as simple as I got like a bag of candy one day. Yeah, And I couldn't be.

00:18:42
Speaker 3: More excited because of just the experience of where.

00:18:45
Speaker 4: Do you keep elmer?

00:18:47
Speaker 1: Yeah?

00:18:47
Speaker 3: And that is the fun thing. It was more the gifts, that's the other thing. And I spoke about that. Don't stress about the gifts it's the production of what you're giving them is the meaningful thing.

00:18:55
Speaker 2: Yeah, and my favorite thing was when we would go downtown before Christmas because when you guys got older, that's what we did, and we go with the Ressins, I remember, and we'd go on chocolate and Christmas lights.

00:19:08
Speaker 6: We'd have dinner downtown.

00:19:09
Speaker 3: It was so much fun, the little Grand America.

00:19:12
Speaker 2: We'd go to Grand America, we'd go to the Maria, we'd go to Olive Garden.

00:19:15
Speaker 6: Think about it.

00:19:16
Speaker 2: We did so many different things, but we'd always go downtown and have dinner, go see the Christmas lights, get hot chocolate.

00:19:22
Speaker 4: It was so it was so fun and so cute.

00:19:24
Speaker 6: And that's what got us into the Christmas spirit too.

00:19:27
Speaker 3: Well. I remember also doing that, and then me.

00:19:31
Speaker 7: Zach and Bart and Dad still would walk over to the Grand America in that bar. I can't remember that little bar, but that was so Christmas like Christmasy to me because you're walking down that hall, two big trees and then you just go in and there's garlands everywhere.

00:19:46
Speaker 3: It just like it was so fun.

00:19:48
Speaker 2: Yeah, and remember we would also stay downtown overnight. Yeah, yeah, during December.

00:19:55
Speaker 4: Yeah, there's just.

00:19:56
Speaker 1: Little things that that stick with me that I want to do for so in ocean. Back to feuds and being raunchy.

00:20:05
Speaker 4: I love this.

00:20:05
Speaker 1: I slept with my brother's friend at my parents' house while we had a party.

00:20:10
Speaker 4: I love how just.

00:20:11
Speaker 1: Nonchal she wrote this, does know? I mean you should probably let me know, babe, because.

00:20:18
Speaker 3: We posted this started.

00:20:21
Speaker 7: Because if your brother doesn't know, you're about to a friendship. Because I couldn't look at my buddy and be like, you fucked my sister.

00:20:28
Speaker 1: My guy, you're either, I'd be so weird it now. I remember when she I think it was Katie after my dad's wake. Katie was like, yeah, she was sitting on your brother's lap and flirting with him, and I about had her head on a platter.

00:20:40
Speaker 3: No, I think she's just I know she should have I love I do too.

00:20:47
Speaker 1: She knows my security blanket. I texted her that this morning. I was like, by the way, I love you, thank you for taking care of me in the group chat. She knows group chat's overwhelmed me, so she let the group know.

00:20:58
Speaker 6: No, She's this sweet and I love her mother.

00:21:01
Speaker 4: She's my last whole family mom.

00:21:03
Speaker 7: She's my best friend right the only Yeah, Ron and Brock brought Now the whole Fami is part of the POSA.

00:21:10
Speaker 3: There's a special place in my heart for Ron. He's just like Dad. That's the exact thing.

00:21:14
Speaker 7: Like he was just talking when we were there, and I was like, I'm fucking talking with my dad right now.

00:21:17
Speaker 3: This is wild.

00:21:18
Speaker 1: I know.

00:21:19
Speaker 3: I love Ron. I love that whole family owners to.

00:21:23
Speaker 1: My cousin punched me in the face for accidentally opening her gift when I was ten.

00:21:28
Speaker 3: How old was she?

00:21:30
Speaker 1: I'm assuming ten, Yeah, because I'm assuming they were both ten.

00:21:33
Speaker 6: She was probably twenty one punching her little sister. That was fucking my gift.

00:21:38
Speaker 3: I see you doing.

00:21:40
Speaker 1: My family does monopoly every year, and if someone isn't crying, we don't play. That's no one's crying and having a meltdown.

00:21:48
Speaker 4: No monopoly for any of you.

00:21:49
Speaker 1: There's nothing funnier than kids sobbing and losing their shit on Christmas. This one's a long one, so I saved it for last. Five years ago, my grandma's dementia was starting to get whole line.

00:22:00
Speaker 3: It may be sad.

00:22:02
Speaker 6: Oh I had one of those two.

00:22:04
Speaker 1: Okay, this one's sentimental, all right, that's not five years ago. My grandma's dementia was starting to get worse. She couldn't recognize new faces, but remembered who we were, just not how we were related. All evening she was obsessively checking out my boyfriend and asking everyone repeatedly who was that hung December twenty fifth is also my boyfriend's birthday. While singing Happy Birthday, Grandma couldn't contain it anymore and ran up, hopped on his lap, grabbed his face, and planted a huge, semi lengthy, wet kiss that was long enough for it to feel uncomfortable.

00:22:40
Speaker 4: Right on his lips.

00:22:41
Speaker 1: It's one of my Grammy. It's one of my favorite memories of her. My boyfriends maybe not so much.

00:22:49
Speaker 6: Lol.

00:22:49
Speaker 4: He said he has.

00:22:52
Speaker 3: Therapy, has therapy, and.

00:22:59
Speaker 1: He said she you had for sure licked her lips several times beforehand. Grandma was a great time all the way to the end, even tearing through the old folks home she lived in. Very christmast While I'm fam hope no one's grandma gives any of you a wet kiss on the lips. It's reminding me of Christmas vacation. The Grandma, She's like, what do you want to say?

00:23:21
Speaker 4: Grace great, she died thirty years ago. And then she's like great that.

00:23:29
Speaker 1: She starts fa, I love that show it.

00:23:35
Speaker 4: No, that's her grandma. Couldn't you imagine that woman being like, who's that hunk?

00:23:40
Speaker 3: With her little brain.

00:23:42
Speaker 4: As she packed up her fucking cat as a gift and just.

00:23:46
Speaker 3: Licking her lips. I can picture at least she didn't tongue.

00:23:50
Speaker 4: That was a great one to end on.

00:23:52
Speaker 1: That was I can picture it all, and everyone, you guys gave me tremendous laughs. I actually now encourage. I can't wait for next. You just say who was punched in the face? Whose grandma showed the boyfriend or pussy?

00:24:04
Speaker 4: I don't know what the fuck is next.

00:24:07
Speaker 6: I can't.

00:24:08
Speaker 4: My mom is acting like she's clutching her pearls.

00:24:10
Speaker 3: I don't talk to this all of my stuff.

00:24:14
Speaker 4: Calm down? Is if I don't talk this way?

00:24:16
Speaker 6: She's like, oh, Chris Bush, it's Chris Brush.

00:24:18
Speaker 3: No, it's New Yek.

00:24:19
Speaker 4: But Christmas is coming gone bet ye you guys, I love you.

00:24:25
Speaker 1: Thanks for listening to another episode of the Give Them Lap Podcast.

00:24:28
Speaker 4: We'll catch you next week. Bye bye,