Birth Stories That Could’ve Sent Us to Therapy

00:00:01
Speaker 1: Hi Amber, Hilelah, Welcome to an Unlikely Affair. Hello, my loves, Welcome back to an unlikely Affair. I'm here with the love of my life, my co host. Hello Amber, Hello darling, which are you playing with?

00:00:22
Speaker 2: Oh?

00:00:22
Speaker 1: This is like the thing that's making it less hard to not vape because you know, I have surgery soon.

00:00:29
Speaker 3: Oh I love that for you, like a little whistle that you suck and set a blow.

00:00:33
Speaker 2: It's going to give you lines on your face. O kidding?

00:00:36
Speaker 1: No, right here, huh right here. I know I'm already struggling with them. Filler and laser can't handle. I'm getting my jawline injected. I think I may have them put threads under here.

00:00:50
Speaker 2: But wait a second, what before you do that? I just had botox done in here. And do you know what this does? She said, you're She said, you're you're that age where you could do it now because my face is starting to pull down right here. If you botox this, it also helps this. And it doesn't pull your face down, it pulls your face back up. So also maybe that's what it is too.

00:01:15
Speaker 1: I'm gonna I'm going into doctor Diamond and I'm just gonna see what he says, because I feel so insecure about it and it's got to be the fucking age.

00:01:24
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's happening, it's happening.

00:01:26
Speaker 3: I'm it's a little bit not Okay.

00:01:28
Speaker 1: Then I don't want to full lower lift because then it changes the shape of your mouth, and I like the shape of my mouth. Is it this that you're worried about? Yes, it needs to be pulled back and then this needs to be filled. Only doctor Diamond can do it because he lays the filler on the bone. Ooh yeah, it's intense to create that L shape. So I need pulled back L and I'll be good.

00:01:55
Speaker 2: All right, I can't wait. I actually woke up this morning thinking about doing my upper eyelids.

00:01:59
Speaker 3: I still don't think you should do that yet.

00:02:02
Speaker 2: Okay, maybe for my fortieth birthday.

00:02:04
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think fortieth birthday is a good a good call. Three years Yeah, I wanted to do an episode because so many people were writing in about our birth stories and if some of them were in alignment or not. Because we have four births total between the two of us. That's a large, blended family.

00:02:24
Speaker 2: That's a lot of blood coming out and a lot of busy stuff.

00:02:28
Speaker 3: Did you give birth both times through the cookie? Mm hmm you did.

00:02:34
Speaker 2: I did?

00:02:35
Speaker 3: And how is she now?

00:02:36
Speaker 1: She is.

00:02:38
Speaker 2: Picasso. She's beautiful.

00:02:41
Speaker 1: Really, my vagina actually got really, like even cuter. Like I've been told I have a really beautiful vagina by women as well, and they're not getting anything from it, right, you telling me I have a pretty vagina.

00:02:54
Speaker 3: It's not like there's an end game, right, It's just like it.

00:02:58
Speaker 1: It's just like a cute little compliment when I was pregnant. My cookie got real cute when you were pregnant. Yeah, I mean she's cute now, but I just in what way. Yeah, she just looked like my face had a glow to it, and my vagina did too, like she too was thriving.

00:03:19
Speaker 2: I'm so glad you're in my ear because Riley is home sick from school today and can you imagine.

00:03:26
Speaker 3: If we were like we would terrify her.

00:03:28
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, I mean she's lying on the bathroom floor she's been throwing out. But this is such a beautiful conversation, Like literally, I love this for you, and I'm so glad. You know, God just really takes care of us. That's all I have to say. Maybe out of your vagina, I think God just as like you know what, I'm gonna throw you a bone.

00:03:49
Speaker 1: I'm gonna throw you a bone, and hopefully a boner like I wouldn't die, would to enjoy that. Do you look at your vagina in the mirror like full spread eagle?

00:04:00
Speaker 2: No? But I did after for sure, after you gave birth. Yes, I wanted to see what happened, like what. I'm also a science nerd, so for me, like, I'm like, oh, what does she look like now? Because for so long I couldn't see her, like you know, you're except when you're I was pregnant during the summer, so I was trying to shave, and for a while, you could shave until your body gets like you know, your stomach gets big, and then you're like filling and trying to shave, and then you had to get a mirror and you're trying to shave, and it's a lot. It's a lot, it's a lot. But I no, I love I love looking and just trying to like. And I also ripped with London.

00:04:43
Speaker 3: I ripped.

00:04:44
Speaker 2: I can't for whatever reason, I don't remember if I ripped as much with Riley, but I was so young when I had London, so my body was probably like you know, even more.

00:04:56
Speaker 1: Yeahan the birth when you're what were you twenty twenty one? Your body is sure? I was twenty one. Oh my god, I cannot imagine giving birth a twenty one. You're like just barely legal to go into a bar and order a cocktail, let alone a fucking baby.

00:05:16
Speaker 2: I don't know. It should be illegal.

00:05:18
Speaker 3: It should be illegal.

00:05:20
Speaker 2: I'll never forget when I gave birth to London, I was so scared. I was so nervous.

00:05:26
Speaker 1: Did you go into labor naturally with both kids or did you were you induced London potocin?

00:05:33
Speaker 3: Okay, Riley?

00:05:35
Speaker 2: I naturally? Which, yeah, your water broke right, yep, my water broke at home. I'm so glad I had both experiences because I don't like pain. I don't want to feel the pain. I had already been through enough emotional pain. The last thing I wanted was physical pain in labor, so I like made sure. So when I with London, I think, just because obviously it's your first baby, your body doesn't really know what it's doing. More times than not, you're gonna be late, right unless there's some sort of precondition, right, or there's something wrong with a baby and they have to do a C section. Riley. I just was like, get this kid out of me. I was I was over it. I had London was three years old at a toddler running around. I was chasing my ex husband. I had two dogs. Like, it was just chaos.

00:06:27
Speaker 3: I was like, oh my god, what a nightmare. Were was he in the room for both? Or no?

00:06:34
Speaker 2: Wait was it London or Riley? You know, it's amazing that, like you get this mommy brain and then after you have two kids, you're like, wait, did that actually happen? And I would always give my mom shit for this. I'm like, how could you not remember? And then now I'm like, oh, when was that? It was for no Riley? It was for Riley. He was doing triathlons. He was in Vegas with his whole entourage. I go into labor at home. Thank god my mom and my sister were there. My sister stayed home with r with London. My mom drove me to the hospital, which was like I couldn't even take a step. The contractions were so painful, like just stepping up into the car. I was like, oh my god. And then my mom's not from La so she didn't know where she was going. So I'm like, in between contractions, I was like trying to show her where to go. And it was like comedy. And we called them in the middle of the night. I think they were in Lake Havasu doing a treathlon and my mom was like, Amber's giving, you know, going into labor. They wake everybody up. They get back on a plane, he lands in Van Eyes, comes to the hospital. I am now just waiting to dilate more. He's like, I'm really tired. I'm going to go to the SLS Hotel with my mom in sleep. And this point I had already been through enough and so I was like, bye, you know, yeah, come back when you know I'm pushing. Of course, I start pushing. My mom's calling and we're starting to push, ring ring, ring, No one answers, ring, ring, ring, No one answers. My mom's like, what the fuck? My mom calls his mom. She finally wakes up. At this point, I think I'm like at a nine, Oh my god. She goes to his room, bangs on the door, and I'm like, where were you? Found out later they both went into the room and went to sleep. I'm like, you, motherfucker, cue motherfucker.

00:08:45
Speaker 1: Really really so comical, it's so good, Like I just can't picture anybody being like, my baby's coming. I'm really tired, Like at that point, I would think adrenaline would kick. And also, don't fucking talk to me about how tired you are. I'm ready to push a human out of my body when I think about giving birth to Sosa. Even though I had these like little spells of passing out, like for my mom to be able to be in the room, for me to have just like so much piece female energy, I wasn't worried about anything. My mom got to cut the umbilical cord. It just it was like a full on redo.

00:09:28
Speaker 2: Oh I love that for you. I love that so much. I remember when I was twenty one and I used to watch TLC like having a baby, and I would be like all day, you know, the last trimester, you literally are just on the couch doing nothing right. And it was in winter, so it wasn't like I could go out and swim or do anything active. And I'll never forget seeing all these horror stories. So I'm terrified to give birth. I'm young. My mom and my mom. I don't think had met him except for one time because my parents obviously they completely disowned me once I got pregnant.

00:10:06
Speaker 3: They're like growing up in your life, right.

00:10:11
Speaker 2: My mom came out for the birth and had met his mom for the first time, and we went to this restaurant up one Sunset called Ketchup. It was like one of my favorite restaurants at the time, and they had like it was so good. I had They would bring French fries and then like six different types of Ketchup. So then I went in at like nine nine ten PM to be induced and stuff, and I'll never forget he I didn't know this. I did not know this. Once you give birth to the baby, He's like, okay, now you're gonna give birth to your placenta.

00:10:46
Speaker 3: Oh my god. He walked you through it. The doctor My what Yeah.

00:10:51
Speaker 2: So I was like, what the heck is that? So they took London and did their thing and was checking her out and they're like, Okay, you're going to do a couple of pushes and you're gonna pull this placenta out. And I'm like, wait, they didn't show me this on TLC. What do you mean I have to do this. So I did that, and it was the most Have you ever seen a placenta live?

00:11:11
Speaker 1: Yeah, I've eaten it. Look at Amber's face. Yes, I've seen a placenta, Babe, you've eaten it? Yeah, like like a fork. Like no, I'm not that, I'm not that barbaric, but yeah, like it. I pushed it out of my body and then they just basically like put it onto a plate and then someone came in the room and like prepared it to put it on ice and in the bag or whatever. And then someone came and put it in capsules.

00:11:44
Speaker 2: Got it, Okay, I mean it, that makes sense in pill form. I pushed it out and he turned at the wrong time, and I had like obviously it's blood.

00:12:01
Speaker 1: He's like squirting out blood everywhere, and he's like, oh my god.

00:12:06
Speaker 2: He goes it's the bride of Chucky, and I was like, fuck you. And I was like mortified because I'm like so sensitive. I'm still like shaking, and I think that traumatized him for life. By the way, most men, I think can't handle that. If I were to.

00:12:22
Speaker 1: Do it, I can tell you something that is so untrue. I have men who my friends are with that are like watching my wife do that was the most incredible experience.

00:12:33
Speaker 3: Of my life.

00:12:34
Speaker 2: I have two experiences of giving birth and they've both been the same, So I don't know any different. I don't know any different.

00:12:42
Speaker 1: Can I tell you I think there's a possibility I could be able to experience all three ways? Like, I think there's a possibility. So my daughter's been begging me for a third baby, begging me. It comes up every day, amber every single day.

00:13:00
Speaker 3: It's becoming exhausting.

00:13:03
Speaker 1: But she's like very fixated on having a brother, and it's kind of a lot of pressure.

00:13:11
Speaker 3: So I don't have any control over that.

00:13:14
Speaker 1: But you know how, at the beginning of the year, I told you, like I was open to love whatever I'm you know, throwing it to the universe, bring someone in.

00:13:24
Speaker 3: If it's not meant to be, don't like whatever will be will be.

00:13:29
Speaker 1: I have opened myself up to the universe that if it has someone waiting for me to have a third baby with, and it'd be right like the way that i'm that someone is supposed to experience having a baby with another person. So I'm throwing that out there into the universe. There is a possibility that I could have baby via piece of shit, baby via donor baby via healthy part.

00:14:00
Speaker 2: Wow, well let's try to do the latter two, not the piece of shit. We'll leave that one now.

00:14:08
Speaker 1: I have to tell you, as the kids get older, where you think you're over the hurdle of it being difficult, it becomes more difficult. Like I'm entering the stage amber with Ocean, where it's like, my kid is can be spicy with other kids at school and hurt kids feelings, but they can also hurt her feelings. And I don't quite know how to go about it about other kids hurting Ocean's feelings. Yeah, you know better than anybody that you're I think both of your kids right experienced bullying and girls not being that nice. And as much as I sit here and go, oh my god, I love being a mother to two girls, boys just seem so intense, it is a different kind of intense. And I'm starting to see things shift and like, oh, we're like really going to school and personalities are clashing and girls are now aware of like, oh, I have good hair, I have long lashes. I'm just throwing shit out there that they didn't care about before. I'm like, you're five. I was just gonna say they're five. I know, but Ocean is caring about things that.

00:15:22
Speaker 3: She's me.

00:15:22
Speaker 1: I cared about these things at a very young age, and my mind worked well beyond its years. And I'm tripping because I was not prepared. I don't know how to parent like this.

00:15:33
Speaker 2: Well, first of all, no one knows how to parent, right, there's so manual for me, and having to deal with London and the way she learns and operates in the world is different than most of her peers, right, and we came to find that out. You just have to validate their feelings. I think if you just and you're setting them up. When you're doing that, you're laying the foundation for healthy emotional regulation down the line, right right, So, when Ocean comes home and someone's being mean to her, instead of saying, oh, I'm so sorry, just say how did that make you feel? Yeah? Nothing, let her talk and then kind of like oh I and then like kind of repeat back, Oh I'm so sorry that made you feel like like you were ugly, or I'm so sorry that made you feel like you were left out when your friends went to go play, you know, on the swing like. I think that's the most important thing is why do we go to a therapist as adults? Really? It's I think ninety percent someone listening to us, and in that process it makes us feel better.

00:16:46
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, I feel like and she's very honest. You know, she'll say, you know this, this kid was mean to me, and I'll say, oh my gosh, like what happened? And she'll go, well, I knocked over him his tower and then did this and then he was mean, And I'm like, but you were also mean first. But I also amber don't want hurt. This is where I get nervous about going in that direction with the how did that make you feel? I want my kid to be seen and heard, but I certainly don't want them to be fucking pussies and fall into like the victim mentality. It's like, okay, how did this make you feel? Going forward? You can't control other people. We can control our own selves. Let's talk about who was nice to you today, who'd you have fun with. I don't want her to hyper fixate on the people who you know she's squared up with at schools.

00:17:43
Speaker 2: It doesn't need to be like an hour conversation, right, it's just like, huh, how did that make you feel? With no emotion? That made me feel? Oh, look at Mommy made you a snack. Do you want some apples?

00:17:53
Speaker 1: Like?

00:17:53
Speaker 2: Once you once she gets it out, like it doesn't have to you don't have to sit in the feelings for hours with her.

00:17:59
Speaker 1: She will the oh she will. I did something before her birthday party. She had a fabulous day, fabulous hours had gone by. She comes up to me and she goes, you were a great mom today besides one thing and brings up what happened in the morning. I go, Ocean, gotta let it go. Shake it off, sister, shake it off. I said, sorry, let it go. If you don't want to let it go. Your issue now, not mine, not my issue.

00:18:28
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh. But Ocean is so special because she's so freaking smart, like so smart, and she knows how to like push your buttons right.

00:18:38
Speaker 1: Yes, the most Amber. I'm dealing with myself twenty four to seven. It's exhausting. Payback's a bitch, It's a huge bitch. And then there's Sosa, who's just like happy to be here, wants to put on She's obsessed with these rose colored glasses. They're in the shape of hearts, and all she wants to do all day long just walk around the house with them on, take them off.

00:19:02
Speaker 3: And go whoa and put them back on. She I'm like brand new soul, brand new soul I.

00:19:11
Speaker 2: Love right, not tainted by the world.

00:19:13
Speaker 3: Do you think Riley's an older new soul?

00:19:16
Speaker 2: One hundred percent. As soon as Riley came out of my vagina and they laid her on my chest, I looked at her and the first thought I had was, You're my ray of sunshine, because I was in such a dark, dark, dark place I had dealt with so much. And now looking at her, she's you know, she's she's a young woman. Now she's getting in she's twelve. I feel like she's like sixteen. But it's that's it's hard. It's hard.

00:19:48
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's not.

00:19:49
Speaker 2: It's not easy. But then there are moments like when she's sick. Not today, but a few weeks ago, when she had the influenza. I went to say good night to her in her room and she had already fallen asleep, and she goes, mama. She never calls me mama. And then I said, you want a hug, and she goes yeah, and she pulled me in for a hug. I literally had a tear down my face because I was like, usually when she's awake, she's like, you know, get away from me, yes, being so mean to me or I'm just not cool or whatever. So that like little moment that I had with her the other morning, I was like, oh my god, this is so just Why can't you be like this all the time?

00:20:31
Speaker 1: I know, but you know what, I feel like, you're also in this stage where like she's gonna start coming around.

00:20:37
Speaker 2: No, really, I think I have a while. No, I think it's not. Maybe this is like a mother daughter thing. But lately I tell my kids, you forgot who the fucking captain is? Yeah, I run this ship. Yeah, let's not forget.

00:20:54
Speaker 3: Oh my god, I'm so turned on by you right now?

00:20:59
Speaker 2: I know.

00:21:00
Speaker 1: Can I tell the amount of times they fucking forget? And by the way, I am not a gentle parent. I'm a fuck around and find out bitch, all right? Do you know who the fuck I am? I don't talk to them like that, but in my head I am, because Ocean will square off with me. The other day we were going toes and sometimes my mom has to intervene because she'll.

00:21:26
Speaker 2: Rock I have to call my mom too. Sometimes I'm like, dude, deal with your granddaughter because I'm about to lose my shit.

00:21:31
Speaker 3: Yes. Yes.

00:21:34
Speaker 1: The other day, Ocean says to me, I was telling her she couldn't wear this outfit. It was horrendous, and she continues to put it on and it's so bad, and so finally I just had to tell her.

00:21:45
Speaker 3: I was like, Ocean, I have to be honest with you. It's so bad.

00:21:49
Speaker 1: And she tells me, Mom, this is what I'm wearing. You don't know what to wear. Look at you.

00:21:58
Speaker 3: Okay.

00:21:59
Speaker 1: I was in sweatpants mismatched because when they mismatch their cozier and she goes, so you need to freaking check yourself. She told me to freaking check myself.

00:22:10
Speaker 3: Yeah.

00:22:11
Speaker 1: Yeah, don't know what I said to her. Amber, I go, you talk to me that way again. I will rock your world.

00:22:20
Speaker 2: That's such a nice way of saying, don't fuck with me.

00:22:23
Speaker 3: Don't fuckit.

00:22:24
Speaker 2: I'm actually gonna use that line. I'm gonna rock your world.

00:22:27
Speaker 3: I will rock you to your very core. Okay.

00:22:32
Speaker 1: No, I know people are gonna judge me, but you can't gentle parents someone like freaking ocean, So.

00:22:39
Speaker 2: This is so funny. Riley wanted her friend to come over this weekend and I had reached out to the mom and they're from Venezuela, so I have to talk through WhatsApp and we have to translate ocause she doesn't know English. And Riley goes God in trouble and I was like, hey, let me just reach out to her mom. I'm like, hey, you know, we'd love to have over. And she's in trouble. She's being corrected, and I was like, I love this. She's being corrected.

00:23:09
Speaker 3: Oh my god, I love that so much I have to write it down.

00:23:13
Speaker 2: Hold on.

00:23:14
Speaker 1: It was so we use that more because we always say you need to come correct. Once they don't, then we need to get you corrected.

00:23:22
Speaker 3: Oh my god.

00:23:23
Speaker 2: I's in trouble for three days and she was being corrected and I said, you know what, that is so powerful to say instead of you're in trouble, she got grounded, you're being corrected.

00:23:36
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, I love this so much. Do you think you'll have a third baby.

00:23:52
Speaker 2: I was talking to my kneebrick about this yesterday because she's my age. She's thirty seven, she doesn't have any children. Were both like in this of like this spot of and need to do it off birth control. That would be three months wirst of all, I gotta find a partner step one, Okay, if I choose to do it that way, which I think I would find a partner three months, get off or you know, get my iud out, which then that you shouldn't start trying. I think until like three months after that. Not a doctor, but I think this is what I've heard. Then who knows if I can get pregnant or not. It's like three to six months after that. Now I'm close to thirty nine, right yeah, oh yeah, almost thirty nine, then nine months of pregnant, ten forty weeks of pregnancy, Like I think you're free, and then I start doing this. Then I start this is this is how bad I get in my head. When the baby's ten, I'll be fifty.

00:24:58
Speaker 3: Yeah, but it's your third baby.

00:25:00
Speaker 2: I'll be fucking tired. Lalla, I'm tired. And then then what about menopause? Then I'm raising a young kid, chasing a young kid while I'm going through menopause.

00:25:10
Speaker 1: My mom does it every day. Your mom's not human she's sixty five rocking a girl. And you know what if, and especially if you had a partner, like obviously you would bring on help, you'd have a nanny, you'd have the partner.

00:25:22
Speaker 2: I can't do it alone. I don't have family here I like. And by the way, the way I parent is not the way my parents parent it so and then you're gonna have people trying to parent you and how you parent your It's like, I just want, I need, I need.

00:25:36
Speaker 1: I know, sounds like you're done, sounds raybe you having a baby?

00:25:42
Speaker 2: Where are we at? Ocean? Ocean wants another one.

00:25:47
Speaker 1: Without giving away my life right now, because I don't want to do that. I have this this intense feeling that my life is going to go in a direction that I'm very excited about that I was closed off to for a very long time. And things are just working and I'm I'm very happy and I'm not fighting it. I had a moment of fighting it for and I had to talk to my mother about it. I had to call some friends. I'm like, why am I wanting to blow this up? Just out of self preservation? You know, going, oh, no, our guard is down out of fear I keep going back to our episode of an Unlikely Affair with Melissa Thompson, the couple's therapist who was long distance with her now husband for I think one eight months a year, and I remember saying to her that my biggest fear is that you know I had done I feel like I have done the work. But it's easy to say you've done the work when there's no partner in front of you. You know, once that person and it's not a hypothetical anymore. And I say, if I feel like my traumas are coming out, does that mean I'm not done with my work?

00:27:22
Speaker 3: And she said it's there's only so much work you can.

00:27:25
Speaker 1: Do on your own before someone has to come in and help recreate experiences and memories so that you don't tap into the trauma and you can tap in with the new person. And I have noticed on two occasions I have wanted to blow it up. Nothing's wrong, and I'm like, no, our guard is down. We want to blow it up. And I'm like, oh my gosh, my biggest fear is coming drough what are you doing?

00:27:52
Speaker 2: M I can completely relate to this. I've been working with a life coach, talk to this life coach and kind of reframing and knowing that I could still be healing. And I truly believe you don't have to be completely healed to be in a relationship. The work is done in the action, right, like taking that pause before you make that phone call or U send that text message where you are going to blow up something that could be potentially amazing.

00:28:20
Speaker 1: Yeah, No, it's it's It definitely has been intense. And I've never had to work through these feelings before. I've been so guarded. I mean, no one is getting in. I don't need to share with you about my life. I don't need to hear about yours. Like I was kind of just a one track mind, right. We were either not talking or sleeping with anybody, or we were like ripping the band aid off and it was like, come one, come all, let's just have a good time.

00:28:54
Speaker 3: Let's build the roster.

00:28:56
Speaker 1: I don't need emotional intimacy, you know how I've been And then.

00:29:02
Speaker 2: All of this, it's very similar.

00:29:04
Speaker 1: The new year comes in, we start our podcast together and I'm like, this is what I'm this is what I'm opening myself up to. And now I'm just I feel like I'm free falling. It's intense, like I'm so happy but so scared at the same time.

00:29:21
Speaker 2: I get it. I get it. I have to say though, I love the woman you're becoming. I really really do. I'm like sitting here looking at you, going who, like who are you? It doesn't mean that like you have to like lose your spunk in like all these amazing qualities about you, but like you on the screen right now, hearing you talk, I'm having a moment of like, what the fuck you are? Glowing? Oh, Ambers you are, and I'm really really proud of you. So whenever you forget, you fucking pick up the phone and you call me.

00:30:06
Speaker 1: And I should have called you, I'm just like I didn't.

00:30:12
Speaker 2: I'm now.

00:30:13
Speaker 1: I don't want to say too much because I'm just very protective of what's happening in my life right now.

00:30:19
Speaker 2: And that's okay. You can You're just getting to know a different version of yourself in a relationship. Yeah, So when those feelings come up, just remember they're just feelings and they last ninety seconds. Let it pass. It's like clouds. You know, you've heard the saying let it roll.

00:30:37
Speaker 1: Let it roll. I should have fucking called you. You're giving me so much great advice.

00:30:44
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's just those moments of a fear. So I have a note card that I wrote and I said, when I feel fear, call it thawing. It's your body thawing. When you feel like emotional or vulnerable or angry, it's whatever shit that we've been through or you've been through. It's it needs to come out, So let it thaw in whatever way. Think of a snowman and it's just melting. It's a nasty it's a nasty snowman. It just needs to thaw. And once it gets out, that's how you keep evolving.

00:31:21
Speaker 1: Okay, I tell you yesterday when I was telling my mom, I was like, I'm in full panic, like why do I why? There's nothing wrong and I want to just launch a grenade and blow up the whole shit. I was like, I'm worried, and she goes, do you see that tree out there? We can all picture the jee right now doing this to be right on the couch.

00:31:41
Speaker 3: Goes, do you see that tree out there? Blowing?

00:31:43
Speaker 1: And it was like this big palm tree and it was just like going back and forth, and she goes, I want you to hang every single worry you have right now on that.

00:31:50
Speaker 3: Tree and just let it blow away.

00:31:53
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm watching blow away.

00:31:58
Speaker 3: I'm so happy now, fucking insane.

00:32:02
Speaker 2: Person, your mom, that's so sweet.

00:32:05
Speaker 1: Well it's true, you guys, Thank you so much for listening to Amber, and I just rambled, this is like what it's like on the phone with you, I know.

00:32:14
Speaker 3: Except people are gonna listen to this.

00:32:17
Speaker 2: I love that me too.

00:32:19
Speaker 1: Thank you, guys for listening to another episode of an Unlikely Affair. We're gonna catch you next week. I love you, Amber, I'll see you soon.

00:32:27
Speaker 2: I love you too, baby.

00:32:29
Speaker 3: Bye bye