Charting a New Course: Tina Parker's Journey from Military Leader to Neuroencoding Pioneer

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to your Thoughts, your Reality with Michael Cole, the podcast that shines a compassionate light on the journey of veterans battling through life's challenges.

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<v Speaker 1>Michael is a dual elite certified neuro encoding specialist in coaching and keynote training presentations dedicated to guiding military veterans as they navigate the intricate pathways of post-deployment life.

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<v Speaker 2>Join him as we delve into the profound realm of neuro encoding science, empowering these Hello, hello, hello everybody, society Forging a New Path Forward, hello, hello, hello everybody.

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<v Speaker 2>So today we have my friend honored to have back on again as a repeat guest, retired Lieutenant Colonel Tina Parker.

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<v Speaker 2>We're going to dive into some more stuff and just super excited to kind of get started.

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<v Speaker 2>And before we do, I just want to remind everybody to scan the QR code at the top right-hand corner.

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<v Speaker 2>It gives you resources to free e-books and resources and everything for veterans and their families.

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<v Speaker 2>So please take advantage of that.

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<v Speaker 2>And so with that, of course also you can go to empowerperformancestrategiescom for that information if you're listening on the podcasts, on Apple Music, et cetera.

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<v Speaker 2>So, tina, I love your back, yay.

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<v Speaker 3>Yay, thanks for having me back, michael.

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<v Speaker 2>We'll have you back every day if you want to be here.

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<v Speaker 3>Well, shoot, I think we probably have something to talk about every day, so that'd be fine.

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<v Speaker 2>Literally so.

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<v Speaker 2>Tina is a dual-league certified neuroencoding specialist.

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<v Speaker 2>She is the owner of Lead Outside the Lines and just a fantastic person inside and out.

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<v Speaker 2>Love you to death, tina.

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<v Speaker 2>If you can, why don't you share a little bit about your journey?

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<v Speaker 2>Who you are, of course, and you know from serving as a a Lieutenant Colonel in the military for over 20 years, and then you know being becoming a neurocoding specialist and you know, founder of Lead Outside your Lines.

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<v Speaker 2>You want to talk a little bit about that so people can get to know you, like I know you.

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<v Speaker 3>Sure, sure, yes.

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<v Speaker 3>So I served for 23 years seven years active duty in the Air Force and 16 Reserve and for me what was so impactful is like I came up in the military right.

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<v Speaker 3>My dad served both, my grandfather served and I actually wasn't even thinking of joining until I was halfway through college, Right, and then I just thought what am I going to do with my life, Right?

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<v Speaker 3>We all get this moment in our life when we're like, hmm what, how am I actually going to survive in this world?

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<v Speaker 3>And so I gave it a shot.

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<v Speaker 3>I joined ROTC and I loved it, and I it would.

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<v Speaker 3>Just, it challenged me in ways that I probably wouldn't have challenged myself otherwise, and just the camaraderie and, obviously, the people that we get to work alongside and grow alongside, and amazing opportunities throughout my 23 years.

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<v Speaker 3>So super, super grateful for that.

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<v Speaker 3>And what I came to understand, though, throughout that time is why I do lead outside the lines.

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<v Speaker 3>Now, why my company is called lead outside the lines is I started to look back at when were the times that I felt most successful?

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<v Speaker 3>When were the times that my team was most successful?

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<v Speaker 3>Right, we were gelling and things were going well.

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<v Speaker 3>We were creating amazing impact, and I thought to myself what was at play when that was happening?

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<v Speaker 3>And what was actually at play is that each of us brought our unique gifts to the table.

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<v Speaker 3>Right, we didn't come at it and try to fit ourselves into the mold of what you think you're supposed to be right when you're in the military and you're in a certain environment, and so.

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<v Speaker 3>But the other part of that, too, was it took me a while to figure that out.

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<v Speaker 2>Hey, tina, some people they never figure it out.

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<v Speaker 2>So that you have the wherewithal, if you will, to go in that space for yourself.

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<v Speaker 2>The world's a better place, my friend.

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<v Speaker 2>Thank you.

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<v Speaker 3>Thank you.

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<v Speaker 3>I know I'm a better person because when I hadn't quite figured it out yet, I was doing all the things right, just running on that hamster wheel and we get into it, we get conditioned Like I have to do, do, do I have to show up?

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<v Speaker 3>I think last time we were talking it came up like suck it up buttercup, like figure it out Right, yeah, but the the secret sauce of life is to chart your path, even in an environment when you think you have to toe the line, so to speak, right, and so that's what I really want to help people connect to is breaking through these invisible barriers that we just get stuck in sometimes and that's what neuroencoding is so brilliant at right and then connecting really to who we are and our authentic gifts, so that we can live in alignment with who we are and into a bigger story of what's possible for our life.

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<v Speaker 2>Absolutely.

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<v Speaker 2>And you talk about neuroencoding and of course, that's very big, I think, for both of us.

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<v Speaker 2>So there's these, you know, defaulting back to your better self or your best self, you know, when you realize this isn't my integrity, this isn't where I am.

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<v Speaker 2>So figuring out what those gifts are and then being able to do that is an amazing, amazing thing for any person.

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<v Speaker 2>So, yeah, so question for you.

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<v Speaker 2>Thank you for sharing that.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you want to share any more about that?

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<v Speaker 3>Just really, you know, for high achievers.

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<v Speaker 3>It's funny.

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<v Speaker 3>I was talking just this week with a senior VP of one of the major defense contractors and she shared with me she's like no, I thought military people were just so much more structured than everybody else and she goes.

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<v Speaker 3>But that's not really it.

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<v Speaker 3>She goes.

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<v Speaker 3>What I'm noticing is like they're just really high achievers.

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<v Speaker 3>They're hard chargers, they're type eight, they're like let's go and let's make it happen, right, and so what I?

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<v Speaker 3>What we're talking about is like the structure is our internal structure.

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<v Speaker 3>That's what we really have to tap into is how am I wired?

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<v Speaker 3>What matters for me?

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<v Speaker 3>Right, and so we burn ourselves out.

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<v Speaker 3>A lot of us, a lot of military folks, are like, and a lot of people in general, but military specifically.

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<v Speaker 3>You know we're, we're on the brink of burnout and we're like I just can't stop.

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<v Speaker 3>I have to keep going right, exactly, exactly.

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<v Speaker 3>It's not all the things we're doing that's causing the burnout.

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<v Speaker 3>It's that we are not in alignment with who we truly are and we're not showing up in our best, in our authenticity.

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<v Speaker 3>We're fighting against ourselves, right, that's what's causing the burnout, and so it's a different shift.

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<v Speaker 3>But it's amazing, when you can connect to that, how much easier everything is.

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<v Speaker 2>Man, I love that, I love that.

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<v Speaker 2>So would you also say.

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<v Speaker 2>Part of that burnout is because it's just a job in a sense, and you've kind of lost the sense of purpose and what you really want sometimes.

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<v Speaker 3>For folks who have transitioned yeah, there is, even if you don't notice it until after you have retired or left the military there is a camaraderie, there is a sense of I'm a part of something bigger than me and that gives us energy.

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<v Speaker 3>Right, that's fulfilling and meaningful.

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<v Speaker 3>And so I know.

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<v Speaker 3>For a lot of folks and I saw this when I transitioned as well I left active duty because I thought, oh my gosh, there's got to.

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<v Speaker 3>I think there's something else out there for me.

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<v Speaker 3>I know the air force because I was born into it.

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<v Speaker 3>I don't know the other side, so let me go see what's going on and what I.

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<v Speaker 3>The reason I came back to the reserve is because I missed that sense of service and that meaning.

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<v Speaker 3>Right, and it's the juice is in us, figuring out what that meaning is for us, Not because it's something around us, but it's something within us that we're bringing out.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, absolutely.

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<v Speaker 2>And I think I'm going to just add is when you find it and you have the skill sets and leadership and all the stuff that the military conditions and or is already inside of you look out, because the fire can burn down the world, right?

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<v Speaker 3>Yes, I mean, look at Tina Parker Powerful.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, yes, absolutely so.

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<v Speaker 2>Thank you for sharing that, Shirley, thank you.

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<v Speaker 2>So it leads us right into something else.

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<v Speaker 2>I want to talk about that.

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<v Speaker 2>The transition challenges.

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<v Speaker 2>Right, and this is my focus.

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<v Speaker 2>Right Is, you know, based on your experience.

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<v Speaker 2>You know, tina Parker, what are the most common challenge veterans face and or you faced, because I know you're real and you'll be vulnerable and talk right, because that's what you do Transitioning from the military to civilian life.

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<v Speaker 2>And how does, sometimes, neuroencoding potentially help address that?

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<v Speaker 3>Oh, my goodness, it's everything and I'll share with you from the time when I transitioned out of active duty, coming straight into the civilian life.

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<v Speaker 3>You know I wasn't a part of the reserve or anything else, and I think we touched on this last time but I left partly because I just had this vision that I wanted to work for Center for Creative Leadership.

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<v Speaker 3>Right Leadership's always been in my blood.

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<v Speaker 3>That I wanted to work for Center for Creative Leadership right Leadership's always been in my blood.

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<v Speaker 3>And when I walked into the building of Center for Creative Leadership here in San Diego area I was excited until I saw like PhDs on the wall and all of these accolades that I did not associate myself as having right.

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<v Speaker 3>At the time I was seven years active duty, which means I was a captain.

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<v Speaker 3>When I came out right, I was in my late 20s, early 30s and I thought who am I Like?

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<v Speaker 3>I'm just, I haven't done anything.

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<v Speaker 3>You know this is part of the issue that I see with a lot of veterans is we just do our job right, you.

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<v Speaker 3>You get plucked into a position when you're military and you just do it.

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<v Speaker 3>You figure out how to make it work.

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<v Speaker 3>So we don't always recognize the genius that we have.

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<v Speaker 3>We don't recognize all the skill sets that we bring to the table right.

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<v Speaker 3>We don't recognize our worth and our value and even when we start to, we're like, how do I communicate that?

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<v Speaker 3>Right, that's so.

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<v Speaker 3>That's a really big barrier for a lot of us when we're making the transition Right.

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<v Speaker 3>And I think for me, when I left the reserve, I retired a year and a half ago, right Started this business.

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<v Speaker 3>I'd started it four years ago doing the dual thing Right, and now it's full on there's still some conditioning in there that, like I even made a meaning around sales.

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<v Speaker 3>Right, that neuroencoding.

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<v Speaker 3>I use neuroencoding to help me shift this mindset and this way of thinking the story.

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<v Speaker 3>Basically, I was telling myself that sales is transactional and it's sleazy.

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<v Speaker 3>Right, it's not.

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<v Speaker 3>I've been selling my whole life as a leader.

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<v Speaker 3>We're selling ourselves and other people on a direction to move things, to do ways of being right.

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<v Speaker 3>We're always selling and so.

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<v Speaker 3>But we get conditioned about certain things, especially in the military.

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<v Speaker 3>That when we're made aware of that conditioning, then we can shift it, and that's where neuroencoding comes into play.

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<v Speaker 2>Yay, yes, it really is fantastic.

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<v Speaker 2>So for me you know we own two companies and for the construction company, years ago I I changed it from being sales to I'm leading people and helping them as I do it, and it's not sales anymore and it's fun because no one wants to sell.

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<v Speaker 2>No one wants to be sold.

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<v Speaker 3>It's service, but it is.

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<v Speaker 3>You're serving and you're providing something of value, and if they choose to use it and do it, great.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, it's.

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<v Speaker 3>We get this.

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<v Speaker 3>We get stuck in meanings around things, whether it's sales or anything else.

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<v Speaker 3>Right, it's the meaning that we give it that makes it what it is.

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<v Speaker 2>I was just going to say that You're fantastic.

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<v Speaker 2>You're absolutely fantastic.

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<v Speaker 2>So some personal insights, if you will.

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<v Speaker 2>What are some of the most rewarding aspects of your work outside the lines, and what challenges maybe do you see on the horizon that you already know you're going to be dealing with, if you will?

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<v Speaker 2>But let's start with.

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<v Speaker 2>You know the most rewarding.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, look at that.

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<v Speaker 2>Smile.

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<v Speaker 2>Hold on, just look at that.

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<v Speaker 2>I know I love it.

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<v Speaker 3>I love, love, love this work, because what's so rewarding for me is when someone's kind of stuck in their stuff and they know that there's something bigger for them.

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<v Speaker 3>They feel it, they feel a pull to the next level, right.

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<v Speaker 3>But they're like there's just, there's this barricade, this block, I'm stuck somewhere and I'm on the hamster wheel and I can't get off of it.

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<v Speaker 3>Right, and we start peeling the onion back and we discover this invisible inner barrier, like the meaning around something, right, and then we don't, and people didn't even realize wait a minute, that's what was getting in my way.

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<v Speaker 3>When you can see it, you can never unsee it, right, and that's what's so exciting, because when they see it, they're like oh, oh.

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<v Speaker 3>And then we have the tools you and I and others that are in the neuro encoding community and other certifications that we have collectively, right, we have the tools to help people shift beyond that block and step into where they truly want to be in life.

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<v Speaker 3>And step into where they truly want to be in life.

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<v Speaker 3>And that is the most exciting, because we all have dreams, we all have these gifts to bring to the world, and we just sometimes get stuck because we don't know what steps to take next.

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<v Speaker 2>Right, absolutely.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, and so what's so rewarding is just to help people clear away the blocks and take those steps with confidence.

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<v Speaker 2>Once you have that, once they, once someone has whether it be yourself or a client or whatever the case may be they have the aha moment, or I also call them the oh shit moments.

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<v Speaker 2>Right, because that's how it becomes a belief when you realize it, not when someone's telling you what to do.

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<v Speaker 2>And that's the difference, I think, with coaching is when you know.

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<v Speaker 2>You know when someone's telling you it's like okay, yeah, that makes sense, but I'm not going to probably do it.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, because you're not connected to it Absolutely.

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<v Speaker 3>Right, but when you discover it, just because of the questions that we ask and the space that we hold to allow people to go into parts of their mind and body that they may not normally go right, that realization for themselves, it sticks.

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<v Speaker 3>Yes, you're right, that's the difference in coaching we help make the invisible visible and then create what you want.

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<v Speaker 2>Absolutely.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah thank you.

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<v Speaker 2>So questions this is.

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<v Speaker 2>This is.

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<v Speaker 2>I love the question.

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<v Speaker 2>It's a little bit sensitive, but it needs to be talked about.

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<v Speaker 2>I truly believe that we need to bring light and, even more so, remove the darkness around things like this.

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<v Speaker 2>You see, you already know what I'm going to go, so you know, in your work specifically, you know how do you address the complex mental health issues or mental mindset is really what I like to call it more so than mental health challenges that veterans face, you know, such as PTSD and anxiety and depression, and families and let's let's call it what it is.

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<v Speaker 2>You know, it's not just veterans and their families, it's also people that have been through trauma, whether that be, you know, being beat up on the street, rape, things like that.

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<v Speaker 2>So what are some thoughts there?

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<v Speaker 3>So one is that all of us have had trauma in our lives.

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<v Speaker 3>Yes, right.

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<v Speaker 3>And sometimes we can feel like, oh gosh, I'm the only one who's dealing with this, everyone else has figured it out and there's something wrong with me.

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<v Speaker 3>And that is not true.

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<v Speaker 3>It's not true at all, because all of us have things that we're dealing with and I get it.

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<v Speaker 3>I've been there.

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<v Speaker 3>I never.

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<v Speaker 3>I didn't want to talk about the loss of my son for a long time because I thought nobody wants to hear about that.

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<v Speaker 3>I don't want to bring people down, but when I started talking about it and just sharing every, I was amazed by how many people were like, oh my gosh, I've had a similar experience.

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<v Speaker 3>Thank you for creating a space for me, right, when we talk about it.

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<v Speaker 3>It's not a sign of weakness, like there's something wrong with me, it's a sign of strength, totally Right.

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<v Speaker 3>And I think one of the things that's really important for folks to recognize too, like especially when it comes to PTSD and trauma, is we get stuck in these loops, right, that we just play out in our mind and in our body.

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<v Speaker 3>There's a physiological reaction in our body when our mind holds images and visions of things that have happened or we are worried that might happen, right, and so when there's techniques, there's a lot of great techniques to help folks shift that physiological reaction so that the mind can recognize this is something that happened before.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm not in it right now.

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<v Speaker 2>Right.

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<v Speaker 3>Right.

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<v Speaker 3>That's the trigger.

00:17:49.559 --> 00:18:06.407
<v Speaker 3>That happens especially for PTSD, is our body feels like we're in the moment Right, and so there's yeah, there's just there's so many techniques, and I really encourage people to be open to the various techniques and try it.

00:18:07.875 --> 00:18:09.980
<v Speaker 2>You don't know, till you try it right.

00:18:10.040 --> 00:18:13.357
<v Speaker 3>You don't know till you try it, Like even for neuro encoding.

00:18:13.357 --> 00:18:14.741
<v Speaker 3>I'm going to be honest with you.

00:18:14.741 --> 00:18:21.862
<v Speaker 3>The mirror technique, like looking in the mirror, looking myself in the eye and saying, Tina, I love you.

00:18:21.862 --> 00:18:34.821
<v Speaker 3>When I first heard that, I was like, okay, no, I just was like I'm just going to feel so ridiculous doing that, but let me share with you.

00:18:34.821 --> 00:18:39.185
<v Speaker 3>The more I did it, I was like, okay, well, I'm going to do this because it's part of my certification.

00:18:39.185 --> 00:18:46.871
<v Speaker 3>Well, whatever is the reason that you actually allow yourself to be open to it, it has opened up so much for me.

00:18:46.871 --> 00:18:51.434
<v Speaker 3>It's a small little thing, right, but it has such a big impact.

00:18:51.434 --> 00:18:54.575
<v Speaker 3>So, Michael, I know you have things to share about some of these techniques.

00:18:54.694 --> 00:18:58.503
<v Speaker 2>I'm good, I'm just enjoying hearing someone else talking about it, you know.

00:18:58.503 --> 00:19:01.438
<v Speaker 2>So it's the mirror technique, you know.

00:19:01.438 --> 00:19:02.038
<v Speaker 2>First of all.

00:19:02.038 --> 00:19:04.505
<v Speaker 2>You know, for me it came very easy.

00:19:04.505 --> 00:19:09.923
<v Speaker 2>It really did, and I love doing it because I truly so everybody.

00:19:09.923 --> 00:19:11.207
<v Speaker 2>Let's just kind of explain it.

00:19:11.207 --> 00:19:23.405
<v Speaker 2>So when you do a mirror technique, you're looking into the mirror, you're looking deep into your own eyes where you can talk to your soul, you feel your soul and you literally say, michael, I love you.

00:19:23.405 --> 00:19:26.019
<v Speaker 2>That's where you start.

00:19:26.019 --> 00:19:42.652
<v Speaker 2>Of course, there's other things you can do after, but when it really starts creating self-love that a lot of people don't realize they don't have because they have self-loathing and all the other you know top 10, you know things that we do.

00:19:42.652 --> 00:19:46.484
<v Speaker 2>So it really is one of the first techniques that we do.

00:19:46.484 --> 00:19:55.704
<v Speaker 2>And, tina, I'm going to tell you something it is amazing how many veterans, civilians I have found struggle with doing that.

00:19:55.704 --> 00:19:58.690
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, until they do, and then they love it.

00:20:05.714 --> 00:20:15.480
<v Speaker 3>Exactly, and I'm an emotional person, right, so this kind of stuff I'm all about it, but when it came to really looking myself in the eyes for me, what I realized over time is that it's it's a receiving issue.

00:20:15.480 --> 00:20:19.371
<v Speaker 3>I give, right, and a lot of veterans, that's what we do.

00:20:19.371 --> 00:20:23.458
<v Speaker 3>We service before self, we give, we give, we give.

00:20:23.458 --> 00:20:27.863
<v Speaker 3>We never want to say I need, I want, can you help me?

00:20:27.863 --> 00:20:29.265
<v Speaker 3>We don't we're.

00:20:29.265 --> 00:20:33.869
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, we get to really connect.

00:20:33.869 --> 00:20:34.911
<v Speaker 3>It's all good, it happens.

00:20:35.674 --> 00:20:36.477
<v Speaker 2>But that's the thing.

00:20:36.477 --> 00:20:37.579
<v Speaker 2>This is live everybody.

00:20:37.579 --> 00:20:39.384
<v Speaker 2>This is live everybody.

00:20:39.384 --> 00:20:41.387
<v Speaker 2>I put my phone on silent.

00:20:41.387 --> 00:21:01.729
<v Speaker 2>You're asleep mode and it's still someone got through, so this is not edited or structured, we're sitting here live no-transcript, and it was my issue.

00:21:01.769 --> 00:21:04.517
<v Speaker 3>It wasn't because, oh, nobody else can give me what I need.

00:21:04.517 --> 00:21:09.306
<v Speaker 3>No, it was like oh, I don't need anything, I'm fine, I give to everybody else, right.

00:21:09.306 --> 00:21:13.154
<v Speaker 3>But what happened, though, for me is when I realized I don't receive.

00:21:13.154 --> 00:21:20.403
<v Speaker 3>Well, I thought how would I feel if I am pouring into other people and they're pushing me away?

00:21:20.403 --> 00:21:22.467
<v Speaker 3>They're not receiving Right.

00:21:22.467 --> 00:21:23.107
<v Speaker 3>It feels like gosh.

00:21:23.107 --> 00:21:24.150
<v Speaker 3>Did I do something wrong?

00:21:24.150 --> 00:21:25.411
<v Speaker 3>Did I not give them what they need?

00:21:26.192 --> 00:21:26.393
<v Speaker 1>No.

00:21:26.894 --> 00:21:34.772
<v Speaker 3>So it starts with us loving ourselves, seeing our greatness and creating space for those around us to do the same.

00:21:35.575 --> 00:21:40.909
<v Speaker 2>Absolutely, absolutely, and everybody listening, now and in the future, try it.

00:21:42.151 --> 00:21:42.511
<v Speaker 1>Try it.

00:21:42.992 --> 00:21:43.353
<v Speaker 2>Try it.

00:21:43.353 --> 00:21:59.210
<v Speaker 2>And you know, here's the thing I tell everybody friends, family, clients, and sometimes they're all so you have to get uncomfortable sometimes, to get comfortable and to break through for self-growth, self-love, whatever you want to call it.

00:21:59.210 --> 00:22:04.317
<v Speaker 2>It's try it, try it again and again, and again.

00:22:04.317 --> 00:22:05.366
<v Speaker 2>Thank you, tina.

00:22:05.366 --> 00:22:06.630
<v Speaker 2>Yes, absolutely, absolutely.

00:22:06.630 --> 00:22:11.211
<v Speaker 2>So, really find a way to push through, and that's with anything in life.

00:22:11.211 --> 00:22:19.134
<v Speaker 2>If you want to be successful yeah, you know being successful you do the hard things and you push through them.

00:22:19.134 --> 00:22:21.538
<v Speaker 2>So what's the mirror exercise?

00:22:21.538 --> 00:22:28.219
<v Speaker 2>Or you know, I don't want to go to the grocery store, whatever the case may be, or starting your own business, or whatever.

00:22:28.219 --> 00:22:35.077
<v Speaker 2>You have to get uncomfortable, to get comfortable more times than not, I promise you.

00:22:35.505 --> 00:22:39.484
<v Speaker 2>Well, I know our capacity grows yeah, absolutely, and then it's comfortable.

00:22:39.484 --> 00:22:45.275
<v Speaker 2>Then you go and you break through the next, next level, right, so 18, I think you muted yourself.

00:22:46.306 --> 00:22:49.054
<v Speaker 3>I did because my landscapers are right outside the window.

00:22:49.054 --> 00:22:49.655
<v Speaker 3>That's okay.

00:22:49.655 --> 00:22:51.429
<v Speaker 3>My phone's- going off.

00:22:51.489 --> 00:22:53.134
<v Speaker 2>We're fine, we're fine.

00:22:53.134 --> 00:22:55.553
<v Speaker 2>So thank you for sharing all that.

00:22:55.553 --> 00:23:02.700
<v Speaker 2>So, and we also bring this up and this is, I think, the point of why we really brought this up is when you're in your shit.

00:23:02.700 --> 00:23:06.154
<v Speaker 2>Right, you are in those states.

00:23:06.154 --> 00:23:12.365
<v Speaker 2>There are tools and tricks and things to move you out of them and get you back.

00:23:12.365 --> 00:23:13.730
<v Speaker 2>You know, sharing light.

00:23:13.730 --> 00:23:19.394
<v Speaker 2>Um to into the darkness, to remove the darkness?

00:23:19.394 --> 00:23:23.173
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, because there's generally both in the area.

00:23:23.173 --> 00:23:24.479
<v Speaker 2>And if you can do that, how does that change your life?

00:23:24.479 --> 00:23:25.542
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, because there's generally both in the area.

00:23:25.542 --> 00:23:28.667
<v Speaker 2>And if you can do that, how does that change your life?

00:23:28.667 --> 00:23:29.868
<v Speaker 2>I've got to chill, exactly.

00:23:30.690 --> 00:23:33.313
<v Speaker 3>Well, and that's the thing, and there's always a way.

00:23:33.313 --> 00:23:46.571
<v Speaker 3>If you try one thing and you're like, yeah, that's not for me, try it again, just to make sure, cause if you're, if it's unfamiliar to you, it's just going to feel uncomfortable just because it's unfamiliar, not because it doesn't work, not because of anything else.

00:23:46.571 --> 00:23:47.534
<v Speaker 3>So try it.

00:23:47.534 --> 00:23:54.096
<v Speaker 3>And if, over time, you're like, yeah, no, really, I like that is not aligning for me, cool, let's try something else.

00:23:54.625 --> 00:23:57.493
<v Speaker 2>And there's, there's infinite possibilities.

00:23:57.493 --> 00:24:04.980
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it's funny when you, when you hear somebody say, I've tried everything, have you, you tried everything?

00:24:04.980 --> 00:24:08.192
<v Speaker 2>And then when you start talking to them about it, they're like yeah.

00:24:08.272 --> 00:24:11.368
<v Speaker 3>I've not tried it Right Like oh well, not that oh not that either.

00:24:13.133 --> 00:24:18.952
<v Speaker 2>And the cool thing I just want to bring up really quick is when you push through something and it becomes comfortable.

00:24:18.952 --> 00:24:21.766
<v Speaker 2>You know, for me this, doing this podcast.

00:24:21.766 --> 00:24:23.270
<v Speaker 2>I've never done anything like this before.

00:24:23.270 --> 00:24:23.431
<v Speaker 2>Right.

00:24:23.431 --> 00:24:24.693
<v Speaker 2>The first one I was you know, for me, doing this podcast.

00:24:24.693 --> 00:24:25.537
<v Speaker 2>I've never done anything like this before.

00:24:25.537 --> 00:24:25.656
<v Speaker 2>Right.

00:24:25.656 --> 00:24:32.316
<v Speaker 2>The first one I was you know, I wanted to throw up and everything else and because it was uncomfortable, but I was pushing myself through it.

00:24:32.316 --> 00:24:41.251
<v Speaker 2>And now there's so much fun and I look back and I think and I go, wow, why was I nervous, why did I go through that?

00:24:41.251 --> 00:24:43.989
<v Speaker 2>And it's just part of the growing process.

00:24:43.989 --> 00:24:53.425
<v Speaker 2>So with these things, you know, again, like Tina said, try it a couple of times.

00:24:53.445 --> 00:24:54.528
<v Speaker 2>If not, there's another option reach out.

00:24:54.528 --> 00:24:55.268
<v Speaker 2>We have.

00:24:55.268 --> 00:24:57.131
<v Speaker 2>We have infinite possibilities.

00:24:57.570 --> 00:25:01.576
<v Speaker 3>And we have a plethora of techniques to use Right.

00:25:01.895 --> 00:25:18.045
<v Speaker 3>And I think one of the things that holds us back, if people in general and from the conditioning of being in the military, is fear of failure, and we don't even want to say it's fear, we just want to say I don't fail, yeah, we all do Right.

00:25:18.424 --> 00:25:25.333
<v Speaker 3>And if we can shift this like and I've, I have a hard time answering, like in interviews and stuff and they're like what's the biggest failure you've ever had?

00:25:25.333 --> 00:25:26.490
<v Speaker 3>We've all had that question.

00:25:26.490 --> 00:25:34.511
<v Speaker 3>I've had a hard time answering it, not because I haven't failed, because goodness knows all the time, but I don't see it that way.

00:25:34.511 --> 00:25:37.053
<v Speaker 3>I see it as I learned something.

00:25:37.053 --> 00:25:38.411
<v Speaker 3>What can I learn from it?

00:25:38.411 --> 00:25:42.057
<v Speaker 3>What's being reflected to me that maybe I just haven't seen before?

00:25:42.057 --> 00:26:11.878
<v Speaker 3>It is a way of moving forward and in fact, with AFWERX the Air Force Innovation Catalyst that was part of what I did right before I retired is that was one of the greatest mindset shifts that we brought to the table, because we were brought together to do it different and one of the things that we said was fail fast, right, just fail faster so that we can figure out what not to do and move closer faster to what does work.

00:26:12.664 --> 00:26:17.453
<v Speaker 2>So what you're saying, tina, is, when you fail, you actually learn faster.

00:26:17.453 --> 00:26:18.355
<v Speaker 2>Is that what you're saying?

00:26:18.355 --> 00:26:20.480
<v Speaker 2>Yep, that's what I'm saying.

00:26:20.480 --> 00:26:24.239
<v Speaker 2>So, if you can define it differently, you know it's the definition, we give it right, that's what I'm saying.

00:26:24.259 --> 00:26:34.534
<v Speaker 2>So, if you can, if you can define it differently, you know it's, it's the definition we give it right, that's it, whether it's a good or a bad thing, and why you see successful people out of the same household with similar experiences.

00:26:34.534 --> 00:26:37.527
<v Speaker 2>Some are, you know, go down and some thrive.

00:26:37.527 --> 00:26:40.530
<v Speaker 2>Right, it's, it's the definitions we give that experience.

00:26:40.530 --> 00:26:45.477
<v Speaker 2>So what if we did that and you thrive?

00:26:46.758 --> 00:26:47.318
<v Speaker 3>Exactly.

00:26:48.220 --> 00:26:50.669
<v Speaker 3>It's red light, green light right, we tend to go to red light first.

00:26:50.669 --> 00:26:52.292
<v Speaker 3>Oh, what if this happens?

00:26:52.292 --> 00:26:54.286
<v Speaker 3>What if I fall off the stage when I'm speaking?

00:26:54.286 --> 00:26:55.429
<v Speaker 3>What if I sound like a moron?

00:26:55.429 --> 00:27:00.366
<v Speaker 3>Right, but what if you touch somebody's heart who really needed to hear what you had to say?

00:27:00.366 --> 00:27:02.290
<v Speaker 3>Right.

00:27:02.290 --> 00:27:05.676
<v Speaker 3>What if you change a life of somebody that you don't even know?

00:27:05.676 --> 00:27:09.931
<v Speaker 3>Like we'd always get to connect to the green light.

00:27:09.931 --> 00:27:10.711
<v Speaker 3>What if?

00:27:10.711 --> 00:27:17.736
<v Speaker 3>Because our brain will naturally go to the red light just because it wants to keep us in that comfort zone right, that's it.

00:27:17.736 --> 00:27:19.067
<v Speaker 3>Like there's nothing.

00:27:19.067 --> 00:27:21.717
<v Speaker 3>There's nothing that you are not prepared for?

00:27:21.717 --> 00:27:33.711
<v Speaker 3>Right, and this is something I want to just share with people is if there's something in your heart and you're feeling called and pulled into a space to do something and you're feeling the resistance to that and the fear.

00:27:33.711 --> 00:27:38.911
<v Speaker 3>The resistance is not because you don't have what it takes, it's not because you can't do it.

00:27:38.911 --> 00:27:44.333
<v Speaker 3>It's because it's unfamiliar and your brain is like oh boy, I don't know what's on the other side of that.

00:27:47.750 --> 00:27:48.893
<v Speaker 2>Let's not go there Exactly.

00:27:48.893 --> 00:27:50.958
<v Speaker 2>So thank you, fantastic, fantastic.

00:27:50.958 --> 00:27:57.752
<v Speaker 2>So let's continue kind of this trajectory, right Breaking through and moving forward.

00:27:57.752 --> 00:28:05.298
<v Speaker 2>What are some success stories, whether it be yours or someone you work with, that you're most proud of?

00:28:05.298 --> 00:28:07.692
<v Speaker 2>Let's see Tina with a smile and glow there.

00:28:07.692 --> 00:28:08.515
<v Speaker 2>It is that fast.

00:28:08.515 --> 00:28:21.816
<v Speaker 2>That didn't take long, I know the beauty is of what we do feels amazing, right, so give me a quick story, maybe of one of those success stories.

00:28:21.895 --> 00:28:22.778
<v Speaker 1>And again it can be yours.

00:28:22.845 --> 00:28:23.689
<v Speaker 2>It can be a client's.

00:28:23.689 --> 00:28:25.788
<v Speaker 2>Please keep their name confidential.

00:28:25.808 --> 00:28:32.796
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I won't say names and I'm just going to share a couple of them real quick, because everybody has their own stuff that they're going after.

00:28:32.796 --> 00:28:36.195
<v Speaker 3>Right, and one of the things that's so powerful for me is one of my clients.

00:28:36.195 --> 00:28:41.611
<v Speaker 3>He's an expert in a certain area, but he wasn't talking about it and he really wanted to.

00:28:41.611 --> 00:28:56.194
<v Speaker 3>He really was like I can make a difference over here, and what we uncovered is that he had a belief that people who talk about themselves and what they're really good at are jerks, and he's not, and he didn't want to be seen as that.

00:28:56.194 --> 00:28:59.827
<v Speaker 3>And so when we could uncover that, then he was like oh my gosh.

00:28:59.827 --> 00:29:02.013
<v Speaker 3>And I said, okay, let's shift this.

00:29:02.013 --> 00:29:07.755
<v Speaker 3>You're not talking about how amazing you are, you're talking about how you can help somebody with an expertise that you have.

00:29:07.755 --> 00:29:14.217
<v Speaker 3>You've been in the trenches man, you've done it Like save somebody else the pain of having to go through that.

00:29:14.217 --> 00:29:15.405
<v Speaker 3>And he was like got it.

00:29:15.405 --> 00:29:17.830
<v Speaker 3>So then we shifted how he talked about it.

00:29:18.231 --> 00:29:24.192
<v Speaker 3>Within two weeks, two investors came out of the woodwork and we're like we're with you, let's do this.

00:29:24.192 --> 00:29:26.709
<v Speaker 3>They created this entirely new holding company.

00:29:26.709 --> 00:29:27.750
<v Speaker 3>It was amazing.

00:29:27.750 --> 00:29:32.050
<v Speaker 3>So never would have happened if he'd gotten stuck in those beliefs right.

00:29:32.673 --> 00:29:51.970
<v Speaker 3>Another one we were shifting some of these I call them saboteurs or the thieves of our dreams right, these things that get in our way and she literally lost 30 pounds and had the best revenue year of her entire business just from uncovering those things that were getting in her way, the invisible barriers Right, and shifting them.

00:29:51.970 --> 00:29:53.855
<v Speaker 3>And it wasn't that hard.

00:29:53.855 --> 00:29:55.729
<v Speaker 3>That was one of the things she shared with me.

00:29:55.729 --> 00:30:02.255
<v Speaker 3>She goes I thought this was going to be like this huge mountain I had to overcome, she's like, but it wasn't, it was just these little things.

00:30:03.046 --> 00:30:11.676
<v Speaker 3>And then another one of my folks like he created five hours in his week and this is a super high level achiever guy like runs a business like is super high level.

00:30:11.676 --> 00:30:15.924
<v Speaker 3>And he was like there's no way I can be more productive at work and spend time with my family.

00:30:15.924 --> 00:30:21.328
<v Speaker 3>And I was like give it a try, let's try it out.

00:30:21.328 --> 00:30:22.730
<v Speaker 3>He's like all right, I trust you.

00:30:22.730 --> 00:30:27.993
<v Speaker 3>And literally he's like oh my gosh, I have five hours to spend with my family.

00:30:27.993 --> 00:30:31.916
<v Speaker 3>I'm now coaching my son's little league and I'm getting more done at work.

00:30:31.916 --> 00:30:33.218
<v Speaker 3>Like this is insane.

00:30:33.218 --> 00:30:37.942
<v Speaker 3>And I'm like yeah, there's short, little, small shifts you can make.

00:30:38.481 --> 00:30:42.810
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, those little and we say it all the time those little two millimeter shifts.

00:30:42.810 --> 00:30:46.219
<v Speaker 2>Right, you're steering the ship, you're steering the ship to a certain destination.

00:30:46.219 --> 00:30:56.173
<v Speaker 2>Well, if you move it to 2%, two degrees, and you go 300 miles, or you go 10 miles, whatever the case, may be kind of crazy.

00:30:56.173 --> 00:30:56.414
<v Speaker 2>What?

00:30:56.414 --> 00:31:00.851
<v Speaker 2>How that trajectory changes Absolutely Small little changes.

00:31:01.445 --> 00:31:03.579
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, and we celebrate those small changes.

00:31:03.579 --> 00:31:16.155
<v Speaker 3>Right, we say celebrate to elevate, celebrate the small changes because your brain wants to go back to what it knows, but when you can celebrate these small changes, it goes oh, oh, that's a thing.

00:31:16.155 --> 00:31:18.528
<v Speaker 3>Okay, we kind of want more of that, right?

00:31:18.528 --> 00:31:20.814
<v Speaker 3>So you're training yourself when you're celebrating.

00:31:20.814 --> 00:31:22.626
<v Speaker 3>So have at it and enjoy it.

00:31:23.147 --> 00:31:24.030
<v Speaker 2>Absolutely.

00:31:24.030 --> 00:31:29.814
<v Speaker 2>It releases all those good, good hormones and things from our brains and just feels good.

00:31:29.814 --> 00:31:40.372
<v Speaker 2>So, celebrate, put a smile on your face, celebrate, pat yourself on the back, get up and shake your ass it's called having an ass-titude, your ass-titude and it feels amazing.

00:31:40.372 --> 00:31:42.877
<v Speaker 2>Look at, look, we're both smiling, just thinking about it.

00:31:42.877 --> 00:31:48.128
<v Speaker 2>So, so those little things, and celebrate the little things, the little things.

00:31:48.128 --> 00:31:50.570
<v Speaker 2>I got out of bed today.

00:31:50.570 --> 00:31:53.292
<v Speaker 2>I brushed my teeth.

00:31:53.292 --> 00:32:06.884
<v Speaker 2>You know I exercise because you're going to want more and more of it and it's easier to make those choices and make them happen, to break through uncomfortable and comfortable choices and make them happen to break through

00:32:06.903 --> 00:32:07.644
<v Speaker 1>uncomfortable and comfortable.

00:32:08.724 --> 00:32:08.865
<v Speaker 3>Exactly.

00:32:08.865 --> 00:32:16.790
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, in fact, I know we're out of time, but I wanted to share this one tip, because it's a neuro encoding tip, right, and so make a list of 50 things that you're celebrating, 50 things you've done in your life, and you might be like I can't get up.

00:32:16.790 --> 00:32:20.672
<v Speaker 3>50 things you got out of bed, you brushed your teeth, right Things that are really great.

00:32:20.672 --> 00:32:22.215
<v Speaker 3>I had a client do this.

00:32:22.215 --> 00:32:27.698
<v Speaker 3>She didn't think she had anybody she could rely on and I said make a list of 50 people you know.

00:32:27.698 --> 00:32:28.722
<v Speaker 3>She was like, yeah, I can't do that.

00:32:28.722 --> 00:32:31.070
<v Speaker 3>I'm like, yes, you can do not stop writing until you get it.

00:32:31.070 --> 00:32:33.237
<v Speaker 3>She didn't even talk to these people.

00:32:33.237 --> 00:32:35.648
<v Speaker 3>They started reaching out to her.

00:32:35.648 --> 00:32:39.376
<v Speaker 3>It literally changes your vibration of your energy.

00:32:40.038 --> 00:32:54.692
<v Speaker 2>So can I add to that amazing tip when you do that and you change your vibrational energy, it's amazing what you start attracting and starts coming into your life Exactly you magnetize what you want.

00:32:54.785 --> 00:32:56.111
<v Speaker 3>You magnetize your vibration.

00:32:56.111 --> 00:32:59.432
<v Speaker 3>So if you're in the dumps, you're probably going to get more of what you don't want.

00:33:00.094 --> 00:33:01.698
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, absolutely Absolutely.

00:33:01.698 --> 00:33:09.439
<v Speaker 2>And you know, if you're in the dumps, change your physiology shake your ass smile and it changes it.

00:33:09.439 --> 00:33:12.667
<v Speaker 2>I appreciate you so much.

00:33:12.667 --> 00:33:15.392
<v Speaker 2>It changes.

00:33:15.392 --> 00:33:19.680
<v Speaker 2>It changes the game in an instant and then take an action to move forward on something.

00:33:20.705 --> 00:33:24.230
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, we're not saying just sit around and smile and hope that everything comes your way.

00:33:24.230 --> 00:33:36.097
<v Speaker 3>We're saying smile to change your physiology so that you can take inspired action Right With excited anticipation as we talk about you know, things will change for you.

00:33:37.306 --> 00:33:38.067
<v Speaker 2>I still use that.

00:33:38.067 --> 00:33:44.271
<v Speaker 2>I remember us talking, you know privately a long time ago, and it's still always stuck, it's it's a thing now.

00:33:44.271 --> 00:33:46.040
<v Speaker 2>It is a thing now.

00:33:46.040 --> 00:33:52.394
<v Speaker 2>So we're totally blowing past our time because we have way too much fun and thank you.

00:33:52.394 --> 00:33:57.570
<v Speaker 2>So tell us a little bit about a program I think that you have out.

00:33:58.271 --> 00:34:00.457
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, so I did a free masterclass.

00:34:00.457 --> 00:34:10.179
<v Speaker 3>It's 20 minutes, it's not a big heavy lift, but it's a masterclass about the framework that I use to help folks really break through those inner barriers and get clear on what they want.

00:34:10.179 --> 00:34:17.498
<v Speaker 3>It helps you to get aligned with yourself because when you're aligned, everything works faster and easier for you.

00:34:17.498 --> 00:34:27.289
<v Speaker 3>And to shift into creativity versus reactivity, because when we're in a reactive state we're in that cycle of fight, flight right, fight, flight freeze and trigger.

00:34:27.289 --> 00:34:37.527
<v Speaker 3>And then how to communicate your value, because when you can communicate your value in a way that others connect to it, the world opens up for you.

00:34:37.527 --> 00:34:46.376
<v Speaker 3>So I'd love to I will put it in the show notes or the comments link that folks can go and just watch that 20-minute masterclass and hopefully it helps you take those steps in the right direction.

00:34:47.025 --> 00:34:50.175
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, absolutely, and please take advantage of that, Tina.

00:34:50.175 --> 00:34:53.492
<v Speaker 2>I'm not talking to Tina right now, I'm talking to you guys.

00:34:53.492 --> 00:34:54.835
<v Speaker 2>Tina is amazing.

00:34:54.835 --> 00:34:58.534
<v Speaker 2>If you don't do it, it's a disservice for yourself.

00:34:58.534 --> 00:35:00.630
<v Speaker 2>I'm just going to say that to anybody listening.

00:35:00.630 --> 00:35:02.054
<v Speaker 2>I believe it wholeheartedly.

00:35:02.054 --> 00:35:08.186
<v Speaker 2>Okay, I'm talking to Tina, so you know how we end this in verse.

00:35:08.186 --> 00:35:10.889
<v Speaker 2>We might go to the longest session yet.

00:35:10.889 --> 00:35:23.367
<v Speaker 2>Tina, give us three tips to help veterans and their families with transition moving further, faster, moving forward in their life so they're thriving.

00:35:24.228 --> 00:35:30.523
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I would say the three major things at first is trust your gut right.

00:35:30.523 --> 00:35:34.014
<v Speaker 3>We sometimes lose sight of how to do that Really.

00:35:34.014 --> 00:35:38.349
<v Speaker 3>Get back in touch with who you are and trust your gut, because it will steer you in the right direction.

00:35:38.349 --> 00:35:47.590
<v Speaker 3>Get clear on what you really want, because that will open up your brain to start looking for possibilities and opportunities that are aligned right.

00:35:47.590 --> 00:35:52.307
<v Speaker 3>And then ask yourself generative questions, life-giving questions.

00:35:52.307 --> 00:36:04.032
<v Speaker 3>One of the biggest and best things you can do for yourself is learn how to shift the questions that you ask yourself, because, just like a Google search engine or Chad GPT right, ai is all the rage now.

00:36:04.032 --> 00:36:06.789
<v Speaker 3>What you put in, you will get out.

00:36:06.789 --> 00:36:11.186
<v Speaker 3>So if you can ask yourself generative questions, it will open up other possibilities for you.

00:36:11.807 --> 00:36:12.829
<v Speaker 2>I love, I love.

00:36:12.829 --> 00:36:15.034
<v Speaker 2>All of those Love it.

00:36:15.034 --> 00:36:16.778
<v Speaker 2>So how do people reach you?

00:36:18.545 --> 00:36:22.251
<v Speaker 3>I'm on LinkedIn and Facebook TP Sunshine 75.

00:36:22.251 --> 00:36:27.186
<v Speaker 3>Sunshine is probably not a shocker for most people, but you can find me there.

00:36:27.186 --> 00:36:38.134
<v Speaker 3>Um, you can also go to the website lead outside the linescom, and I'd love to connect with anybody who wants to help you, help yourself, move further faster.

00:36:38.735 --> 00:36:42.829
<v Speaker 2>Amen Um Tina, I'm proud to call you a friend Um love you to death.

00:36:42.849 --> 00:36:43.150
<v Speaker 1>I truly do.

00:36:43.150 --> 00:36:44.172
<v Speaker 1>You're amazing, Um we're 37 minutes.

00:36:44.192 --> 00:36:45.193
<v Speaker 2>I'm proud to call you a friend.

00:36:45.193 --> 00:36:46.637
<v Speaker 2>Love you to death.

00:36:46.637 --> 00:36:46.858
<v Speaker 2>I truly do.

00:36:46.858 --> 00:36:47.177
<v Speaker 2>You're amazing.

00:36:47.177 --> 00:36:48.340
<v Speaker 2>We're 37 minutes.

00:36:50.385 --> 00:36:53.414
<v Speaker 3>I'm pretty sure we're the longest now Before we go, I just want to say thank you, michael.

00:36:53.414 --> 00:37:03.407
<v Speaker 3>Thank you Because this platform and what you're bringing to the world veterans and those who are not veterans it's so needed and I really, really appreciate you.

00:37:03.427 --> 00:37:04.230
<v Speaker 2>Awesome.

00:37:04.230 --> 00:37:05.251
<v Speaker 2>Thank you Truly.

00:37:05.251 --> 00:37:07.195
<v Speaker 2>Thank you Truly.

00:37:07.195 --> 00:37:08.137
<v Speaker 2>It means a lot.

00:37:08.137 --> 00:37:13.976
<v Speaker 2>So at that we did the tips how to reach you.

00:37:13.976 --> 00:37:14.838
<v Speaker 2>I think we're good.

00:37:14.838 --> 00:37:18.331
<v Speaker 2>So, everybody, we're out of here.