Girl Talk with Lexi Young | 'Golden Hour'

00:00:07
Speaker 1: Welcome back to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour. Thanks for joining us. Hi, Susan, so excited to be back.

00:00:15
Speaker 2: How are you doing? Are you great?

00:00:17
Speaker 3: I had a great trip to New York City the last couple of days. I'm back. I'm ready to go. And hey, you people out there, if you're not following us, you're missing a lot. I'm just saying, you know, just follow the Bachelor Happy Hour and find us on Golden Hour and you won't miss it.

00:00:35
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00:00:45
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00:00:46
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00:00:57
Speaker 3: And you know what, we're having so much fun answering these questions. You got to keep them coming, people, We're having a ball doing this. Sometimes they're sad, sometimes they're funny. Sometimes our advice is off the charts, but we always have something to say.

00:01:13
Speaker 2: Yes, we do as we do all right?

00:01:16
Speaker 3: Well to have some great questions Kat today and the most perfect guest ever.

00:01:22
Speaker 1: We do today, Bachelor Nation star and fan favorite and one of our very favorites, Lexi Young is here. Hi, Lexi, thanks so much for joining us and we just cannot wait.

00:01:34
Speaker 2: To chat with you.

00:01:35
Speaker 3: Lexi, you are a hot blonde. I'm just saying, I hope the world knows what she did. I mean, she's plus ten. I kid.

00:01:45
Speaker 4: I love you, guys, Thank you.

00:01:47
Speaker 1: I'm so glad you're here. Tell us what's going on with you? Besides, blondes do have more fun and you are absolutely gorgeous. Tell us what's going on in your life? Give us an update and crazy.

00:01:57
Speaker 5: I mean, I'm sure, as you guys know it, coming off the show show and getting back into life is an adjustment, to say the least. I feel like now I'm, you know, kind of out of it enough that I'm back into the day to day so I'm still working my job, so I am, you know, pretty busy nine to six during the week and then trying to date, which I'm sure we'll get to.

00:02:17
Speaker 1: Oh.

00:02:18
Speaker 3: I can't wait to hear this.

00:02:19
Speaker 1: So so, Lexi, you talked on Joey season about your health issues with Endometrio says can you and by the way. That was incredibly brave of you to do that. So kudos to you. And you know it's an ongoing journey for you. So could you kind of share your updates on that.

00:02:36
Speaker 4: Yeah, definitely can.

00:02:37
Speaker 5: I appreciate you guys asking so, yeah, and know is you know, it's a disease that is so unpredictable and it progressively gets worse over time. I was actually in New York a couple of weeks ago and I saw my surgeon and I'm at the point it's tough, right.

00:02:51
Speaker 4: So I'm at the point where they want to do another surgery.

00:02:53
Speaker 5: So they want to go in and they want to take out all that tissue that shouldn't be there. But I just turned thirty one years old, and so my doctor said the ideal scenario is I would have one more surgery right before I want to conceive. And so that's a pretty hard thing to hear when you're saying, right like, I'm like, well, how do I time that up? Like I'm not even dating someone, let alone havings about having a child. So I'm kind of in this waiting game right now, where like the pain has gotten worse, but I can't I'm not really a candidate for surgery. Given my age, they don't want you to have too many surgeries because it creates like a lot of scar tissue.

00:03:31
Speaker 4: So it's been kind of tough.

00:03:33
Speaker 2: So wait, I'm a little confused.

00:03:34
Speaker 1: Like, see, you're saying they would go in and take out the tissue and then expect an immediate try to get you immediately to conceive before the tissue has a chance to regrow.

00:03:44
Speaker 2: Is that it.

00:03:44
Speaker 5: Actually because when they go in, they clean you up, so you're like in your optimal state, like all of that, and then because the tissue grows back immediately.

00:03:53
Speaker 3: It's so ready to conceive.

00:03:55
Speaker 2: Yeah.

00:03:55
Speaker 4: Yeah, so that was a hard conversation.

00:03:58
Speaker 3: Let's see, is it painful?

00:04:00
Speaker 4: It is?

00:04:01
Speaker 5: Yeah, and it's it's like it's the type of endo. Is the type of disease where it hits you at any point, right, And that's also tough during dating because I can be getting ready for a date, feeling fine and then just get hit with a flare where like I'm dehabilitated in cramps, and like, how do you explain that to someone you just met? You know, So, like it's it's tough for sure.

00:04:20
Speaker 1: Can you explain do you when you're on a date, do you tell I mean, we saw you do it on National TV.

00:04:27
Speaker 3: Not the first date, no, but.

00:04:29
Speaker 1: Typically I mean, how is that received? Like, because a lot of people just don't know much about endometriosis, you don't, and.

00:04:36
Speaker 4: It's a fine line.

00:04:37
Speaker 5: I think I do try to disclose it now more early on because it's a part of my life and I want you with someone that's like no worries, like we'll figure it out together. But I don't want to do it on the first date because I have trauma from my past where it was it was you know, my AX had an issue with that, and so he saw it as like a negative to me as a person. And so like joe gave me the confidence to feel like I can have those conversations, but it doesn't care for me.

00:05:06
Speaker 1: Are you are you committed to having your own children? Would you adopt? How do you feel about that? Because you did? I read somewhere or someone tell me that you have frozen your eggs.

00:05:17
Speaker 4: I did. I froze them like eight days before I walked through the limo to meet Joey, which.

00:05:22
Speaker 3: Is what's so sweet.

00:05:25
Speaker 4: I was like, it was sweet, but I was so like you're on so many hormones during that, Like, I was not myself, I feel like, but that's okay, I mean, it all worked out.

00:05:33
Speaker 1: But wait, can we use that excuse Susan Eggs? So we weren't ourselves on the show.

00:05:38
Speaker 3: She was absolutely fabulous, So I mean, yea and more class than and more strength. We really admire you.

00:05:47
Speaker 4: Thank you.

00:05:48
Speaker 5: So yeah, I have my eggs and you know they're frozen right now down the street, and so that is reassuring. But I am to answer your question one hundred percent open to adoption. I'd love to have one of my Like I've always wanted to be a mom. I feel a calling towards that, and but adoption is something with the right person, I would absolutely love to adopt.

00:06:08
Speaker 3: I love it.

00:06:09
Speaker 4: I love it.

00:06:10
Speaker 3: So I have a question. Do you believe in Soulmates?

00:06:16
Speaker 2: Did you lose that?

00:06:17
Speaker 3: I mean, did you believe in it prior to the show? And do you feel any differently now?

00:06:24
Speaker 2: Yeah?

00:06:24
Speaker 5: I think you know, if you had asked me that at twenty six, I would have been like, yes, one hundred percent. Like you know, but it's so funny as you date and you get older while you're dating, like you realize you can have multiple soulmates.

00:06:35
Speaker 4: You realize you can fall in love multiple times.

00:06:38
Speaker 5: And I always say that to my friends that are going through a hard time because your first love, Like it's so meaningful and powerful. But I look back to the person I thought I was going to marry, the person that I broke up with before I went on the show, and I'm so grateful that we did not right, and you see all those things afterwards.

00:06:54
Speaker 3: It takes time, Yes, it takes time to realize that.

00:06:58
Speaker 1: Yeah, Lexi, how long were you with your pat your ex that you broke up with.

00:07:03
Speaker 5: Yeah, about two and a half three years, so it was substantial. We were talking about marriage, engagement, you know, the house, the whole thing. I live in Atlanta. People here are married at twenty two.

00:07:12
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, you know.

00:07:14
Speaker 4: I'm me.

00:07:14
Speaker 5: I was like, Okay, when is it going to happen? And everything happens for a reason. I'm so grateful it didn't work out, But it does make you reevaluate how you think about soulmates.

00:07:22
Speaker 4: At least me. I'm sure you guys feel the same, right.

00:07:25
Speaker 3: I still believe in soulmates, and I believe there's more than one out there.

00:07:29
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think for me, it's I agree with Susan, I agree with you, Lexi. I feel like you know, I would love to find my partner, my next partner, but I'm not going to try to replace my husband. It would just be someone different. But yeah, I think you're gonna have more than one soulmate. I just have to one of the quick questions about your ex, because we talk about this a lot on the show. Would you ever consider dating him again?

00:07:52
Speaker 4: Absolutely not?

00:07:53
Speaker 2: No.

00:07:53
Speaker 4: Oh wow, okay, never in a million worlds.

00:07:56
Speaker 5: I think I was very disrespected in that relationship towards my and I wish the confidence I have now. And you know, it's funny, like I my whole life have always kind of been in the background. I never saw myself as like this confident person. But watching the show back, I saw this person I didn't even know existed in me, and I was like, why would I tolerate that?

00:08:16
Speaker 4: And so I don't regret anything. Everything happens for a reason, you learn.

00:08:21
Speaker 1: So that's a great segue into my next question, which is, given your experience with your ex and given your experience with Joey and just what you learned from the show, tell me what you're looking for now? How is are your expectations different? And what are you looking for now that you were before?

00:08:40
Speaker 5: They're so different it's funny, and I don't want to be that person because I'm only thirty one.

00:08:43
Speaker 4: I've not you know.

00:08:44
Speaker 5: Sometimes I talk to my friends who are like twenty six, and I act like this elder. I'm not, but has changed I used to be. I have to be with this tall. I've had this whole hyper fixation on tall. I don't care they could be five four. I want someone who has a good soul, who is smart and driven and very empathetic and has the same long term goals as me in terms of like having a family and you know, building something together. And I don't care really about the physical anymore.

00:09:11
Speaker 3: It's about them being emotionally ready to.

00:09:15
Speaker 5: Them being emotionally ready, having a maturity to them, and I think physical can grow. I've also learned that as I've dated, I've gone on dates with people that I was not excited about looking at their pictures, and then I got to talk to them and I was so attracted to them.

00:09:30
Speaker 3: Nice. How is the dating going right now?

00:09:33
Speaker 2: Like?

00:09:33
Speaker 3: What's going on?

00:09:34
Speaker 4: It's tough out there.

00:09:37
Speaker 3: I gave up.

00:09:40
Speaker 1: But you know, I look at you, Alexi, you are absolutely truly I'm not just saying this, you are absolutely stunningly beautiful. Do you think that maybe men are intimidated by your beauty?

00:09:54
Speaker 2: Have you ever thought about that?

00:09:56
Speaker 1: Like they look at you and they go, oh, she wouldn't talk to me going to try?

00:10:01
Speaker 2: I think maybe you need to make the first move.

00:10:03
Speaker 5: I think my intimidation for me is like in my career because I've poured myself into my work, probably to a bit of an extreme, and I'm a bit of a workaholic, and I go on dates with people and they're like, oh my gosh, I look up to you so much, like you're you're so driven, And I don't really want to hear that. I want to be like, I'm also driven, you know, like I think a lot of the times so like I've been alone now for a while, I'm thirty one, I'm extremely comfortable in my own life. I'm financially stable, Like I don't need you, so like what are.

00:10:30
Speaker 3: You want you? There's a different yeah.

00:10:34
Speaker 1: And I love hearing that because so many women, younger women, they say I just need the guy to complete me. No, no, no, friends.

00:10:42
Speaker 2: You need to be.

00:10:43
Speaker 1: Complete by yourself and then let the right person compliment you.

00:10:48
Speaker 2: That is just brilliant. Like, so you're so right, I mean, do you.

00:10:52
Speaker 3: Have conversations not on the first few dates of course, about having children what you want?

00:10:58
Speaker 4: Yes, I'm pretty open about it.

00:10:59
Speaker 3: I mean, yeah, I don't see why you shouldn't be.

00:11:02
Speaker 5: Why not like and that's the other thing. Now, I used to hold things back or give people a chance, Not that I don't not give people chances, but if I see red flags, I kind of just keep it moving now and I'd rather say yeah, I do, yeah, right, like I do want kids to I mean, I'm not trying to.

00:11:19
Speaker 3: Till sixty years for me to figure that out.

00:11:22
Speaker 1: Susan, We're going to discuss this at a later date. Susan sees red flags and you know, let me give them a couple of years and see if I can change those right flags, toy.

00:11:32
Speaker 4: Would you guys agree that they never go away?

00:11:34
Speaker 3: Never? Never ever ever either mine?

00:11:38
Speaker 2: Yeah.

00:11:38
Speaker 1: Once a red flag is there, it's it's red, it's crimson, and call it any color you want, but it's not white.

00:11:46
Speaker 3: We are who we are, We believe and feel the way we do nobody can change that, right. Do you think they'll stick to your guns? You are, so I'm even more proud of that than I was.

00:11:59
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm very Yeah, I agree.

00:12:01
Speaker 1: I want to know Lexi because you do seem so confident now, and I think I'm asking you, do you think men out there want women at your age? Because at my age, you know, we're talking about dust. But at your age, do you think that men want a woman who is dependent on them? What's going on in your age range? Do they want that dependency and you're too independent because you seem independent?

00:12:28
Speaker 4: Yeah, I do think so.

00:12:29
Speaker 5: I've run into that in the dating world, where I think guys are like, we'll almost want you to lean on them more so they can feel that power of masculinity, like where I'm.

00:12:38
Speaker 4: Like, I again, I don't need you, I want you.

00:12:40
Speaker 5: You're in addition to my life and bringing you kind of as a's how can you enhance what I already have?

00:12:46
Speaker 4: And so, yeah, I think guys are threatened by that, not I want.

00:12:50
Speaker 3: You're absolutely correct, and it's a little bit I dare say game as independent as all three of us are, whether it's financially, I don't mind being alone. I want to share my life with.

00:13:05
Speaker 2: You, Susan, I need you, but you need.

00:13:07
Speaker 3: Them to think you need them at certain times, just like you always have to say thank you, oh baby, you did that for me, where we don't think anything of it. You know, yeah, you took out the trash. Well, that's your job, you're supposed to take out. That's your duty, my duty, and the dishes or whatever. But when they get gratitude for it, that makes them feel I know. I learned that the hard way.

00:13:30
Speaker 5: Trust me, I don't accept it right like I think I'm so much like like a lot of guys will be like, you want me to pick you off or call you an uber, and I'm like, what do you mean, Like I can get.

00:13:39
Speaker 4: There on my own. You mean, sure, call me an uber?

00:13:44
Speaker 1: Like you know, Lexi, that's when you say, yes, please send me your jet.

00:13:51
Speaker 2: Forget.

00:13:52
Speaker 3: What is your favorite thing and least favorite about being single?

00:13:57
Speaker 5: That's a great question. I don't think anyone's asked me that. It's always the narrati of is now, like, well when are you going to meet someone?

00:14:02
Speaker 3: It's not about that.

00:14:04
Speaker 5: Yeah my favor I guess my least favorite thing is life events, So I think, yeah, I have all these things like the fourth of July, your birthday, Christmas, Thanksgiving, wedding, yesing, Like I want to start building memories. I want to be like, oh, last year for the Fourth of July, we went to the beach, we saw the fireworks, and like building traditions, Like I feel like I go through the minutia these you know, these big like big holidays, and I'm with all my friends and I love them and they're amazing, but sometimes it's like I wish I could share that with someone else. So that's probably my least favorite thing, and my favorite thing about being single is being able to pour a lot of energy into myself in a way that you can't necessarily always do when you're in a relationships. You can be a little selfish, right Like you can and you know, I'm working on a side project right now outside of work, and you know I can take the trip and go visit a friend.

00:14:53
Speaker 3: I maybe because I do whatever you want. I think that's why I'm still single, because I will always do whatever, which is why I included.

00:15:03
Speaker 2: Susan, That's why you're still single because you will.

00:15:07
Speaker 5: Yeah, I've heard that before, because I'm like, shoot, okay, it is it. It's about being a team, right, and I'm super aware of that.

00:15:14
Speaker 1: So let me just explain to you, in my opinion, you're right, you can do whatever you want. Now, when you get married, then you have to consider your partner or not get married. But when you get with someone, you have to consider your partner. And then when you have children, game over. No more sleep, no more. You know, it's it's a whole different you know, a whole different world. So you know, I'm glad that you're enjoy while it's a mixed bag, right, it's never perfect because when you're your age, you want children and you want a partner, but you know, once you have them, you have them, and so it's it's hard.

00:15:48
Speaker 2: To get that mixed.

00:15:49
Speaker 5: Really, second baby right now, and I go to all the baby showers. I'm the fun aunt, so I see what it does to a relationship though, to that, like my friends who have had the strongest marriages have had rough days, right because having a newborn baby is hard, so you really have a strong foundation to bring in children.

00:16:06
Speaker 1: And yeah, so how do you, I want to know, Lexia, how do you stay so positive?

00:16:10
Speaker 2: Then? Because you are clearly.

00:16:13
Speaker 3: How she's living her best life.

00:16:14
Speaker 2: Look at her.

00:16:15
Speaker 3: She looks in the mirror and feels thankful, grateful, Look at me.

00:16:19
Speaker 2: Hey, Susan, you and I do too, but that you know, some days we all wake up, Come on, we all wake well.

00:16:24
Speaker 3: I'm about to go down the beach this weekend as the fifth wheel again. I'm kind of getting used to it. I mean, yes, I'm sorry, where's invitation? But I know what you're saying, Lexie, you do get used to it. You still go and you're not disappointed, but it would have been nice.

00:16:43
Speaker 5: Yeah, You're like, I definitely have my days where especially like it will hit me like I go behind. And I know that's so dumb to say, but like I know, I think, oh my gosh, my friends around their second kid. Like by the time I have kids, their kids will be in middle school. I mean that's so dramatic, but like you know, you get in your head and it's natural.

00:17:01
Speaker 4: Yeah it is.

00:17:02
Speaker 1: Is there something you do though, like every day? Like I wake up every day and I know Susan does too. We just say thank you. We're so grateful to you know, wake up and have the energy. Is do you have something you do that keeps you positive?

00:17:14
Speaker 5: I feel a sense of hope because I do believe after going through a few traumatic relationships that ended, and I've been through a lot, like with my health, I've been through a lot of seasons for being thirty one, there's hope that it will happen when it's supposed to happen. I know that's so like lame to say that sentence act, but I do feel that he's out there right now, and it's we just haven't crossed paths for a reason, and we will soon.

00:17:43
Speaker 4: And when it.

00:17:44
Speaker 5: Happens, I feel like it will probably happen quickly for me because my life set up to bring someone in and I would hopefully meet someone that matches that.

00:17:50
Speaker 2: But I mean, I would you date someone older?

00:17:54
Speaker 4: I would? I would with.

00:17:55
Speaker 2: Children, with someone who has children.

00:17:57
Speaker 4: I've thought about that. I don't I can't answer that. I don't know.

00:18:01
Speaker 3: I think I it would depend on the may I guess the fil.

00:18:06
Speaker 5: Yeah, I never saw that for myself, so that would be something new for the right person. I would as long as they would want more children, so that's really important to me. But I would date someone older, for sure. I've always stated.

00:18:18
Speaker 3: Young me too.

00:18:19
Speaker 1: You've always stated guys younger than you. Okay, Lexi, Lexi, this, I think we may have just hit before we move on to the next topic. I think we may have just hit the jackpot as to why you're not dating guys who meet your standard, because guys do not mature until they're Oh, I don't know, what do.

00:18:38
Speaker 3: You think since five years behind us?

00:18:41
Speaker 2: Yeah, five to ten.

00:18:43
Speaker 1: I mean that's why I'm saying you might want to look at guys a little bit older because you have.

00:18:47
Speaker 3: Your older I'll go younger the same age.

00:18:52
Speaker 4: A lot of times they have a lot of trauma baggage. But who doesn't, so.

00:18:56
Speaker 2: Maybe everyone does, I know.

00:18:57
Speaker 5: But if you find someone who's like and I have no business dating a twenty six year old, but a lot of the times the younger guys like are more multible.

00:19:05
Speaker 4: This is terrible.

00:19:05
Speaker 2: I don't know, it's not terrible.

00:19:08
Speaker 4: I should probably.

00:19:10
Speaker 3: I want to hook her up with Nick.

00:19:11
Speaker 1: I swear you got a jet mass and I got married when I was twenty and I trained my husband and I'm not doing.

00:19:18
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's you.

00:19:20
Speaker 3: They don't do that anymore, Kath that's done.

00:19:23
Speaker 2: Really, forget another reason. I'm just saying we.

00:19:26
Speaker 3: Can't compare that but we're going to have some advice with Lexi. Lexi, will you join us with this one?

00:19:33
Speaker 1: So we read some questions and then we give some advice, and we want you to weigh in on this. Okay, all right, here's our first one. This one is from anonymous, age thirty two from Cleveland, Ohio. Hi, Golden girls, I'm curious if you have ever known anyone to cancel a wedding after so much has already been paid for. I have just been having this gut reading feeling recently that my fiance and I are not meant to be. We have been together for five years and I didn't see this coming, but as the day is approaching, I am realizing for a lot of reasons, like him recently deciding he doesn't want to have kids after we previously discussed otherwise, that I should not marry this man.

00:20:21
Speaker 2: If you know anyone who has been through.

00:20:22
Speaker 1: This, how did their family, friends, bridal party react. I haven't told anyone besides my therapist that I'm thinking about this, and we are four months out. I feel so guilty because we have all spent a lot of time and money on this, but I know if we get married, it will end in divorce. Any words of wisdom are appreciated. Thank you, besties. Well, Anonymous, what do you think? What do you think?

00:20:46
Speaker 5: I know someone that this happened to. I won't say who because someone looks as his wife. But it was a similar timeline. And was it hard? While it was happening, they had already had the bachelorette party, everything was planned, everyone's flights were booked. Yes, it was hard. And but here's the thing that people in your life who love you and support you do not want you to go obert on marriage that is going to end in divorce. If you're thinking about that before walking down the aisle, it's only going to get more challenging. And so yes, it might be like a season, a little period of really something you don't want to deal.

00:21:18
Speaker 4: With, but I can. I have to say you can't. You can't.

00:21:21
Speaker 3: Yeah, it'll hurt like hell. But I think she should upfront talk to him and tell him what she's thinking and feeling, you know, because sometimes men will say, oh, I don't think I want to have kids, yet they do or they don't even know they do. Not that she should stay and try it and end up in a divorce, but you're exactly right.

00:21:40
Speaker 2: The people I think I think people would say, yeah.

00:21:43
Speaker 1: I think people initially would say, oh, you're just having cold feet. That's what people would start to say. But but the but anonymous, what I hear you saying is you're very thoughtful about this. You've you've talked about it with your therapist, and and what I'm hearing is he has changed his mind about children.

00:22:04
Speaker 2: And you know what, that's just not okay to do it.

00:22:08
Speaker 1: And frankly, that's what engagements are for. You know, it's better to break it off now, in my opinion. You know, send back the silver, send back the honeymoon money, send it all back, and next when you find the right guy, go elpe. And you know what, even you've made it, even you haven't spent too much money. I think that's really sad. But I think she's got to do the right thing.

00:22:29
Speaker 3: I think it hurts a lot, and you're going to feel guilty, but don't just just be you and be true to yourself, because if not, you'll regret this.

00:22:38
Speaker 4: Yeah, and I think it's important to talk to him too, Like I do. I understand that you can get these thoughts in your head and they can ruminate and they can start to spiral, Like I think sitting down having a conversation, maybe he feels the same way.

00:22:51
Speaker 3: Like that's what I said, Like she's really considering stopping this.

00:22:57
Speaker 1: Also, she's also very concerned about what her family and friends, and.

00:23:03
Speaker 3: They're her family and friends. They're going to get over it.

00:23:06
Speaker 2: Yeah, and if they don't, you know.

00:23:08
Speaker 5: Not their life. They're not agreement. They're not living with him for the next sixty years, like at the end of the day, Like they might have thoughts, feelings, emotions, but it's not their life. And so she only pender her story.

00:23:20
Speaker 2: And Lexi, you're so wise, she is.

00:23:23
Speaker 3: We wish you lots of luck. Anonymous from Cleveland, Okay. The next one is from Robin and she's forty eight and from Fort Lauderdale, Florida. Hey, ladies, I have been running into an issue in the bedroom with my husband. We are on very different pages when it comes to sex, like how often we want it, how often each one wants it. He has a high libido and wants to have sex every day, sometimes even two times a day. Not only do I not have that sex drive, but a few years ago my back got injured in a car accident, so having sex that frequently isn't sustainable for me. Some days I'm in pain and cannot have sex at all. I don't know what to do or how to get on the same page about this. We are great partners otherwise and have been together for fifteen years, but I fear he is going to want to leave me over this because we've been fighting about it recently. Let me know your thoughts and if you have any advice, thank you and love your podcast.

00:24:30
Speaker 2: Oh me, okay, LEXI, what do you say?

00:24:34
Speaker 4: That's a tough one.

00:24:35
Speaker 5: I think as someone who has a lot of pelvic pain, I can understand to a degree of you know, maybe someone wanting it more and being in pain and not being able to necessarily do that all the time. But I think with the right person, if you had an open line of communication, there's other things that you can do by words that maybe you guys can find other things that can like spark that romantic by what they're looking for in a different way that's not as impactful to her physical health and way right.

00:25:06
Speaker 3: I mean, when I first hear it, I feel bad, But then I also know women like she's forty eight, so you kind of the libido goes like this, it's going to start and the next ten years are even worse when you start losing hormones and starts.

00:25:23
Speaker 1: I don't think that's true for every woman. I don't think that's true. I think can women, Yes, some women their libido increases over age.

00:25:31
Speaker 2: I think I was that girl. Yeah, I think that that this Robin what I'm hearing.

00:25:37
Speaker 1: Maybe part of this is and I think you can agree with this, Lexi. If you're in pain and you know something, some sexual act is going to cause you pain, you're probably not saying, hey, let's go do that because you know what's going to ensue. Right, So she's probably fearful of the pain, and that decreases her sexual appetite.

00:25:56
Speaker 3: I mean, I get that, but there's other things right could play. Yeah, so keep them satisfied, so to speak, but in a way that you could enjoy it as well.

00:26:08
Speaker 4: Exactly.

00:26:09
Speaker 2: Yep.

00:26:09
Speaker 1: Do you not think I'm curious again, Lexi, Susan and I are, you know, on the other end of the spectrum here. But do you think that not having sex twice a day, like, can you see that ruining a marriage?

00:26:24
Speaker 3: No, said day is a lot.

00:26:26
Speaker 4: I think, Yeah, I think that you know everyone.

00:26:28
Speaker 2: Well once a day whatever I'm saying, could you see that?

00:26:32
Speaker 5: I think not after fifteen years. I think everyone has their expectations of what they need from a physical perspective, But there has to be something outside of that physical relationship that's keeping you together, right, Like, it's not their whole relationship. Isn't writing on this and I hope not? And it sounds like it's not because she said they have a great marriage. But yeah, I think you know, it's all about communication, especially when she steals.

00:26:56
Speaker 3: My words, I love you. You're exactly right. Yeah, that's our sea work.

00:27:01
Speaker 2: It is, it is.

00:27:02
Speaker 3: But again, it is so important that you have a conversation, let them know how you're feeling.

00:27:10
Speaker 2: I agree with that.

00:27:12
Speaker 1: What I was trying to say is even if you can communicate, I'm asking you, as a younger person, even if you communicate, if if that, if her husband is that's his jam. You know, I want to have sex once a day, sometimes twice a day. And that's what I hate to say. It has become a deal breaker for him.

00:27:32
Speaker 2: Marriages have ended on a lot less.

00:27:34
Speaker 3: But it's not yet. She's worried that it could they've been Yeah, she's thinking, overthinking it, she's feeling a little bit of guilt.

00:27:44
Speaker 2: She hurts.

00:27:47
Speaker 4: Rob.

00:27:48
Speaker 1: You know, Robin, send your husband to Susan and me will take care of him. You just rest your back, will take care of him.

00:27:54
Speaker 3: Oh my goodness, Robin. We wish you luck, but talk to your man and then discover other things. Yeah, exactly, that's even coming from a thirty one year old and a seventy one year old and a sixty seven year old.

00:28:09
Speaker 2: Wow, I know.

00:28:12
Speaker 3: I'll meet them now.

00:28:15
Speaker 2: I think we've we've hit the hit the wait, lex.

00:28:18
Speaker 4: What if it were you and they wanted, you know, to be physical?

00:28:23
Speaker 3: I mean twice a day every day is ridiculous. Come on, that gets old after fifteen years.

00:28:27
Speaker 5: Can be wrong with the right person. Like, I'm a very physical touch type of type of gallon. So lot o the things you can do.

00:28:34
Speaker 3: But like, what is your love language, Lexie?

00:28:37
Speaker 4: I love languages quality time for sure.

00:28:40
Speaker 5: I love being with the person that I care about, doing nothing even like you know, but I feel like you know, you could probably I could speak to all of them, but quality time is mine.

00:28:49
Speaker 4: What about you, guys?

00:28:51
Speaker 3: Physical touch and well, I think I want all five.

00:28:55
Speaker 2: I want them all, but I want look, I want them all, I want them all.

00:28:59
Speaker 1: I have a question, Lexi, before we leave here, do you have any questions for us, any advice you want from must or do you have any advice for us?

00:29:06
Speaker 3: And totally what do you think?

00:29:09
Speaker 4: God?

00:29:09
Speaker 5: Well, I guess the advice, Like I guess you know you said you got married Kathy at twenty.

00:29:15
Speaker 4: How old you were?

00:29:16
Speaker 3: I was a little older, okay, in my twenties, So.

00:29:19
Speaker 4: In your twenties? Like, what what do you like?

00:29:22
Speaker 5: There's all this pressure, right, I mean, I feel it a lie as I'm turning thirty one, Like everyone says that thirty five your fertility goes down, and I have a you know, you.

00:29:30
Speaker 3: Know my girlfriend just had a baby. She's forty two and she gorgeous.

00:29:34
Speaker 5: And then you hear narratives. I hear this all the time. Oh you're single and thirty one? What's wrong with you? Oh?

00:29:39
Speaker 3: Yeah?

00:29:40
Speaker 1: So I will tell you, Lexi, my daughter moved back. She's as beautiful as you are and very successful, and she moved back to Austin. And this is the advice I'd give everyone who if you're asking for advice, who's your age?

00:29:53
Speaker 2: And you seem to really have adopted it.

00:29:56
Speaker 1: Do the things that you love, whatever those activit, these are, whatever brings you joy, Get out and do those things, and the right people will come into your life, because they're not going to come knock at your front door, right. But if you're out doing the things that you love and meeting people, you're going to meet that person that connects with you and that you connect with.

00:30:17
Speaker 3: And I do believe that to a point, Kathy be the times are so different with the dating apps and the people with their head down and they think, oh that one's next, who's next? And there are multiple dating sites. It's not always that easy. Well I was, But the most important part of the statement that you just made was do the things that you like that make you happy and if that happens.

00:30:42
Speaker 5: Great, Yeah, yeah for sure. And just trying to stay positive like you guys said, but it's not it needs to stop.

00:30:49
Speaker 3: Like I think, Kathy has to keep me positive because I bitch all the time.

00:30:54
Speaker 4: Not perfect obviously, I think you said if you got.

00:30:57
Speaker 2: Sorry, wait excuse me, who's not perfect?

00:30:59
Speaker 3: Well, God, don't go there.

00:31:01
Speaker 2: Lex.

00:31:04
Speaker 3: We would love to be in your company again. And you're in Atlanta, I.

00:31:08
Speaker 4: Am for now.

00:31:08
Speaker 5: Yeah, I'm trying to figure out what that looks like for me because dating in Atlanta is hard.

00:31:12
Speaker 3: But I don't want to move every city every not.

00:31:15
Speaker 4: That everyone tells me, but like, you're not going to move to New York and be.

00:31:18
Speaker 2: Come to Austin. There's tons of single guys in Austin.

00:31:20
Speaker 3: Austin's great too. Have you ever been.

00:31:23
Speaker 4: I've been for a work trip. I've never been for fun, but it's they had great restaurants, Like it's.

00:31:27
Speaker 3: Yeah, hot, hot, hot, hot, but it's a beautiful, beautiful city. And you know what, you have given us such good advice, given everybody good advice. I just thank you so much from the bottom of my heart. And Kat, maybe we could take the show on the road and go down to Atlanta and hang and we'll do a puckist from her.

00:31:45
Speaker 1: I love that I have great friends in Atlanta. I'm going to see if they can if they've got you, if they've got kids, your rage, So I'm gonna see if they know anybody's single.

00:31:51
Speaker 2: Let you. I'll get back to you on that.

00:31:53
Speaker 3: You just keep doing you stay beautiful.

00:31:56
Speaker 4: Thank you guys the best.

00:31:58
Speaker 3: That Well, that's it for this episode of Bachelor Happy Hour's Golden Hour. Thank our lovely guest, Lexie, and this is not the last time we'll be talking to you. We adore you.

00:32:11
Speaker 1: Yeah, Alexi, We have loved chatting with you and I have to say I loved you on Joey's season. I love you even more now and it has nothing to do with you being blonde. You are wise beyond your years and whatever's wrong with you, guys, figure it out because this girl should not be single. But in the meantime, Lexi, while you're looking for a guy, the rest of you join us on our podcast. Be sure to follow Bachelor Happy Hour. We have new episodes coming out all the time and if you enjoyed today, you are gonna.

00:32:41
Speaker 2: Love the one sung it up.

00:32:43
Speaker 3: You need to go to her page and check her out. Did you post what you look like right now with this blonde hair? I mean, I just can't.

00:32:51
Speaker 2: You are one hot mama.

00:32:53
Speaker 3: And ladies and gentlemen submit your questions because you see what we do. We dissect them. We give the best advice we can. I mean, we're all over the map with it. So you can go to bachelornation dot com slash Goldenour and hit us up on social media.

00:33:09
Speaker 1: Listen to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you listen to podcasts.

00:33:16
Speaker 2: Thanks again and have a great week. See you next time.