Sobriety, Mental Health, and Insta Archiving

00:00:13
Speaker 1: What's up, my loves It's La La Kent's with Randall and we are back at it.

00:00:18
Speaker 2: Wow, I got to say something.

00:00:20
Speaker 3: I mean, last week's episode, I was excited just because the whole astrology thing, the fact that I got bad ankles. I'd be all, that was cool because I had no idea. How could you even know that? But I had no idea that just talking amongst friends would blow up into this huge, you know, media storm about the relationship. Although I mean, I guess just so I've been around it. But it was pretty it was pretty interesting.

00:00:48
Speaker 4: Wait, you had no idea that it would turn into a media storm.

00:00:50
Speaker 1: I did. They've never done like an interview, They've been photographed, and I made like, I asked Megan beforehand, are there things like that? You? I always want to make sure guests feel safe when they come on the podcast. We're not here to like spill tea that you don't want spilled. We're not messy like that. And so I just asked simple questions.

00:01:09
Speaker 2: And you don't want to spill tea on them while they're sitting there.

00:01:12
Speaker 4: No, I just like, I don't want to be.

00:01:15
Speaker 2: God.

00:01:16
Speaker 4: You're such a dad joke.

00:01:18
Speaker 2: You're such a dad joy that went right over your head. The tea flew right over your head.

00:01:23
Speaker 4: Dad jokes tend to go over my head.

00:01:24
Speaker 2: Yeah, well you know I could show them high level jokes.

00:01:27
Speaker 4: Well that's sad.

00:01:28
Speaker 3: Okay, moving on, But I agree with you, meaning I agree with you that No, the answer is, I did not know that this would turn into that, because the thing is everybody it was that count out of the bag and it was like it was already everywhere. I didn't think it would be like the pinnacle of interviews with them, like we're sitting down with the new couple.

00:01:45
Speaker 2: It wasn't like that.

00:01:46
Speaker 3: It was about astrology and that us.

00:01:48
Speaker 2: That's my take. So it's exciting.

00:01:50
Speaker 1: Yes, So for those of you who are just tuning into the Give Them All with Random podcast, Randal and I are talking about last week's episode where we had.

00:02:00
Speaker 3: Megan Fox a machine nun Kelly, who are a couple now.

00:02:04
Speaker 1: Correct, and they spilled some epicity along with like how they it came to be, But it was it was more of how they came to be. It was like how the universe impacted their relationship.

00:02:15
Speaker 3: But don't you but you have to admit, like you like I didn't. I've been around them for months now, six months, and you've spent a lot of time with them, with vacation with them. I did not think that it went I mean, I think it was even too deep for me. I mean I think I was just like like the twin flame split in half thing. They lost me. But they're deep, They're they're like they're in it deep.

00:02:38
Speaker 4: Amazing.

00:02:38
Speaker 3: Yeah, I love it. And by the way, they're very close friends of mine. I know I say that a lot a lot of guests, but I do bring a lot of my friends on these things and your friends, and it was really special to see people really happy. So that's all I'm going to say about that. And now I'm going to move on to something I would like to talk about.

00:02:56
Speaker 1: So, I with everything that's been going going on, and I've been very open about my sobriety and you know, my issues with mental health and things like that.

00:03:07
Speaker 4: And I won't say who did this.

00:03:10
Speaker 1: But you know, I'm talking about the Kanye West issue and him being bipolar and how people are it's a media frenzy, give.

00:03:18
Speaker 2: It hold on.

00:03:18
Speaker 3: So for somebody like me who's not as cool or in the know, I've seen some things on the internet. So basically, what is going on is Kanye and Kim have been having issues. Kanye is running for president, but that's not for real. The running for president was front because I don't know.

00:03:35
Speaker 2: Just explain to me.

00:03:36
Speaker 4: The thing is is like, I'm not super in the know either.

00:03:39
Speaker 2: Yes you are, well, yes you are.

00:03:41
Speaker 1: Who knows if Kim k and Kanye West were doing great. Let's just assume they were, Okay. Kanye said he was running for president, all things good whatever.

00:03:51
Speaker 3: Okay, Then he's so he really is running for I'm asking that's why I don't.

00:03:55
Speaker 2: Know, Well, no one knows, okay.

00:03:57
Speaker 3: So he said he's running for president, but we we don't know if that's one hundred percent ballid or not.

00:04:02
Speaker 2: But he's announced he's running for president, right, But then.

00:04:05
Speaker 4: He did a rally.

00:04:06
Speaker 1: He went and did this rally, which I believe was a rally for like Kanye twenty whatever.

00:04:12
Speaker 2: Okay, so he's running for president.

00:04:13
Speaker 1: And he mentioned that North his child with Kim Kardashian he wanted to abort the kid, okay, and just was telling some very intimate personal things, okay.

00:04:27
Speaker 2: And at a rally, at a rally, rally running for.

00:04:29
Speaker 1: President correct and Okay, basically after that, Kim was not happy and you know, the latest statement, and.

00:04:39
Speaker 3: Then she made a statement regarding his statement at a rally, so clearly she's unhappy he's saying things about their personal life that she has at one out there, and now the relationship is.

00:04:51
Speaker 1: It's I mean, I think I think if Kanye were just an asshole, she would be like undone with this motherfucker. But at the end of the day, he's been diagnosed as bipolar. So he was having an episode and he went on to Twitter after this rally and was having an episode, and.

00:05:10
Speaker 2: As he come out and said anything in.

00:05:12
Speaker 1: That version, he made a statement about how sorry he was to his wife Kim and how she's always had his back and she's oh love of his life. And you know, for me, I've always been someone who I don't take mental health lightly lightly. One of my cast members at the reunion, when I was having an emotional thing happened, made a comment that I might be both bipolar. I don't think that it's something that should just be thrown out there. I think it's gross, right.

00:05:43
Speaker 3: And by the way, and with regards to mental health, you know, I'm forty nine years old. I've been around a long time now, and I've you know, had family who have had bipolar. You know, my grandmother was bipolar. My you know, other family members of my family have serious health issues in the same you know, with similar bipolar issues.

00:06:07
Speaker 2: And it is it is not to be taken lightly. It is.

00:06:10
Speaker 3: It's incredibly challenging. And you you know, when you have a family member you love, or a friend that you love, or whoever it may be, you know, dealing with pipolar and getting that person to a stable functioning right.

00:06:23
Speaker 2: You know.

00:06:23
Speaker 3: And I had I had a a family member who, when they did not take their medication right, would lock themselves in their office for weeks at a time, blow through all their money, you know, do very manic type things, and and it was very very hard for our family. And we always supported and always rallied and always encouraged. But you know, you do the best you can, but you also want to be there for them. And sometimes they won't take the help. They have no interest because they're in that app episode or they're not taking their medication.

00:07:02
Speaker 2: That does help them.

00:07:03
Speaker 3: And I've dealt with that firsthand, and it's it's uh, it could be really really tough. So having said that, not getting off course, I can understand if this is what, if that's what it is, bipolar.

00:07:15
Speaker 1: Well, he's been diagnosed as having bipolar disorder by a doctor.

00:07:21
Speaker 4: Okay, And for me, there's such a have they.

00:07:24
Speaker 2: Ever come out?

00:07:24
Speaker 3: Have they ever come out, because I again I don't know this. Have they ever come out as a couple and said he's bipolar?

00:07:30
Speaker 2: Yes? Oh, he said, talk about it all the time.

00:07:32
Speaker 1: Oh, I didn't know that his new album is titled I Believe, or like his most recent is.

00:07:38
Speaker 4: I'm Bipolar It's awesome or like something.

00:07:41
Speaker 1: Okay, so this is obviously no, it's very much a known thing.

00:07:44
Speaker 2: Okay, got it. Okay, I was just a numb and again I'm not in the numb right.

00:07:48
Speaker 1: And for me to look at that and see so many people commenting or making memes, it's just I get that we live in a society where there's a lot of things that happen and we make light of them and we try to create comedy out of them. At the end of the day, you know, throwing throwing a word out like oh, you must be bipolar is not cool. You making fun of someone who's having ups and downs is not cool.

00:08:14
Speaker 3: Well that's but that's not even it's heartbreaking. And if you've experienced it firsthand or watch somebody like you're watching somebody, as you're saying in the media, that's very hard to see that because you're seeing somebody that's in need of help, and a lot of lives are ruined, families are broken over this. If it's not If it's not so, I don't think it's funny at all, And clearly whoever is making.

00:08:40
Speaker 2: Fun of is I don't think it's I just don't think it's a funny.

00:08:43
Speaker 4: Social media is about.

00:08:44
Speaker 1: Social media is about wanting to know the ins and outs of everyone's life. And I think just because this family, the Kardashian family, who's had a reality show much larger than the one I'm on, but there are things that still should remain private, and so it's hard to watch someone like Kanye have this episode of By.

00:09:07
Speaker 3: The way, Kanye West, even though I'm not in the know, I do know and respect Kanye West is one of the greatest musical artists, businessman.

00:09:18
Speaker 2: And pioneers of so many different industries and.

00:09:22
Speaker 4: That should never be discredited.

00:09:24
Speaker 3: No, I mean he's just but I mean, this is just the guy that I even there's not a lot of people I like, I could say I look up to or influence, like to look up and see what they've done. I mean, okay, that's wrong. There are a lot of people that have but most people don't know that unless you know me personally, who's influenced me? Kanye West, for sure, I don't know anything about the personal stuff. But on a business level, as an artists, as the brand he is created as a vocal vocal artist.

00:09:55
Speaker 2: Yeah, but a very vocal artist.

00:09:57
Speaker 3: I mean, he's just one of the greatest that will ever walk this planet.

00:10:02
Speaker 5: So it's it's so And that's what's so hard is you don't a lot of people, when they see behavior like this, discredit his genius and look at him as.

00:10:12
Speaker 4: You know, someone who's very volatile, and it's you.

00:10:16
Speaker 2: Know, and some support.

00:10:18
Speaker 3: You know, it's not fun, right, meaning you're saying you're saying on the social media, which I have not seen this part where they make fun. But I mean, I think mental health and any of these kinds of issues are should never be taken back.

00:10:31
Speaker 1: And I'm like, I'm the type of person who uses comedy for everything, but there's just something about a mental illness that is for me just throwing it out there and either making fun of it or like labeling someone as something because that's happened to me. It happened to me at the reunion, and it's just like everything is so minimized in our society right now.

00:10:57
Speaker 2: Well, listen, this is awesome because I just I didn't even know this was going on. I'm going to know this level of it was gone.

00:11:04
Speaker 4: So well, let me tell you about we.

00:11:07
Speaker 1: So we came off of like a very light and fun podcast last week, and this week I wanted to get a little bit more real because we're going into the one hundred teenth day of quarantine COVID all of it, and I've noticed people's mental health kind of crashing, and I just want to make today about mental health, sobriety and try to acknowledge things that people have asked about.

00:11:31
Speaker 3: So I respect that and I'm excited about that. So I'm gonna I'm gonna have no humor.

00:11:37
Speaker 2: Today because you know they can have humor. You just said it has to be serious, so I'm.

00:11:40
Speaker 4: Like, you know, it's not about being serious. It's about acknowledgement.

00:11:43
Speaker 2: So I can tell jokes.

00:11:44
Speaker 4: We can tell jokes.

00:11:45
Speaker 2: We'll be back. Can I say we'll be back here? Let's say it. Okay, we'll be back. We're back. We're back with the heavy podcast.

00:11:56
Speaker 3: Go ahead with I'm not I don't know how to contribute to a heavy podcast, like we have to be heavy, it's.

00:12:02
Speaker 4: Not supposed to be heavy.

00:12:04
Speaker 3: There's just a lot of things you want to but I respect you want to address like I want.

00:12:09
Speaker 4: To address that.

00:12:09
Speaker 1: And also like I did a sobriety post the other day and I got a lot of people that were just reaching out about sobriety and how it kind of goes hand in hand with mental health, and so I just wanted to do a podcast that was like not ignoring that's ignoring things that are important.

00:12:28
Speaker 4: You know, There's only so many things we can.

00:12:30
Speaker 1: Talk about that like are not fucking important. You know.

00:12:34
Speaker 2: Can I say something?

00:12:35
Speaker 3: Yeah, I do agree with you, and I think that talking about sobriety because I see a lot of people are very inspired by you.

00:12:41
Speaker 2: So I respect that.

00:12:42
Speaker 4: Thank you.

00:12:43
Speaker 2: I do. Before we get so heavy, I just thought we could just tell a joke. So I have a joke.

00:12:50
Speaker 3: Why do we tell actors to break leg why because every play.

00:12:55
Speaker 2: Has a cast.

00:12:59
Speaker 4: I have a joke too.

00:13:00
Speaker 2: Okay, you go ahead, then we'll get serious.

00:13:02
Speaker 1: Okay, what did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?

00:13:08
Speaker 4: What we better perk up before somebody thinks we're nuts.

00:13:14
Speaker 2: That's pretty good? Yes, okay, all right.

00:13:17
Speaker 3: So back to let's let's talk about the dinosaur, no elephant, let's talk about the elephant in the room.

00:13:24
Speaker 4: I love, Okay, I.

00:13:25
Speaker 3: Mean, since you want to have a heavy podcast of joking time, I said that. I think it's kind of like my original joke of laala with ram Kind.

00:13:33
Speaker 2: I'm going to go with it for like.

00:13:35
Speaker 3: Okay, So, first of all, you showed me, as well as many other people, four hundred articles that came out.

00:13:45
Speaker 4: I didn't show them to you. You showed them to me. That's true.

00:13:49
Speaker 2: Not true, That is true. Okay.

00:13:51
Speaker 1: Well you're the only person in this relationship at Google's okay.

00:13:55
Speaker 2: That's a lie. Okay, well it's a lot. That's you're a lie to You don't send me articles, you don't read your own ship?

00:14:07
Speaker 4: Do you send them to me?

00:14:08
Speaker 2: Do you read your own ship? Yes? Or no?

00:14:09
Speaker 4: I'm asking, yes, I read what you send to me.

00:14:11
Speaker 2: Do you read also your own ship online? No, that's a lie. I'm coming. That's oh my god.

00:14:19
Speaker 4: I found out that.

00:14:21
Speaker 2: Can I just say story thing? Thank you? Whether I read it or four hundred of my friends sent it to me.

00:14:29
Speaker 1: Hey, you have to keep your voice a little down because, let's be honest.

00:14:33
Speaker 4: We're doing this on a cell phone, because can.

00:14:36
Speaker 2: I just hear take me out of my moment.

00:14:38
Speaker 3: What I'm saying is whether I read it or people send it to me, which a lot of people send it to me. More of my friends sent it to me like they were concerned. They're like, did you and Lalla break up? I was like, well, we're sitting in a house right now, water skiing on a boat.

00:14:54
Speaker 2: Did I miss something?

00:14:56
Speaker 3: And then I realized because I didn't realize we have never followed each from the day we've met.

00:15:01
Speaker 1: I've had you blocked since I got with you.

00:15:05
Speaker 3: Same Yeah, okay, so hold on. So of course I didn't know that you had removed or what do you call it archive? I don't even know you could do that to me, right, so you archived all of our pictures, which then led people to believe we broke up, which I was shocked and didn't get the message in the house, so I wish you would have told me. But then you But then I said, so, why are they writing all these articles yourself?

00:15:34
Speaker 2: Because I archived you? And I was like, what do you mean you archived me? What am I? What am I? Eighteen? So I guess you get pissed off at me.

00:15:42
Speaker 3: And if we get into a tit, which which by the way, we've been together.

00:15:47
Speaker 2: We're a married couple, we're a merry couple, doesn't okay.

00:15:49
Speaker 3: So the bottom line is we've been together a long time, so we get tits.

00:15:53
Speaker 2: Everybody gets a tits. That's relationship.

00:15:55
Speaker 4: It's a tit. Not a tit.

00:15:57
Speaker 2: Oh, it's not a tit. No, it's a tiff.

00:16:01
Speaker 4: You get into a tip.

00:16:03
Speaker 2: Tip have fun.

00:16:05
Speaker 3: I'm trying to have a serious so you want to have a serious podcast. So we're getting a tiff, yes, okay, And every couple gets in TIFFs, and when you've been together a long time, you get TIFFs. And when we got the tiff, I didn't know that you archived my photos.

00:16:22
Speaker 2: I do, so what is that? And then I don't even know on And here's the worst part. I didn't even know you archived my photos. I had to find out by an article online.

00:16:30
Speaker 3: Yeah, and then I came in and I said, did you break up over the tip?

00:16:33
Speaker 2: And you're like, are you crazy?

00:16:35
Speaker 1: No, So here's what happened which and don't cut me off. Please, let me just do my thing for five seconds.

00:16:42
Speaker 3: And then, by the way, your fans hate when I cut you off, so I'm going.

00:16:45
Speaker 2: To pay what Okay, okay, go ahead.

00:16:47
Speaker 1: So basically I have started posting the twelve step prayers.

00:16:54
Speaker 4: I started with.

00:16:55
Speaker 1: Number one, then two, then three, and then the day that I archived your photos was step four, the Step four prayer.

00:17:04
Speaker 4: Which basically, what does that say?

00:17:06
Speaker 1: That is where you acknowledge that it is you who has turned your.

00:17:10
Speaker 4: Life into a mess.

00:17:11
Speaker 2: Oh, and you talk.

00:17:12
Speaker 1: About your resentments, and then you have to acknowledge the part that you played. Basically, the fourth step in the program is the hardest step that you have to do. You have to take for me and for many other people. When you hear about the twelve step program, most people will say the fourth step, it's a.

00:17:31
Speaker 4: Very long time.

00:17:32
Speaker 3: So you posted this step on the day that we had a tip, on the day that you archived me and that's why.

00:17:40
Speaker 1: So everyone put those two things together and it was like a media frenzy of like Lala Kent says her life is a mess.

00:17:49
Speaker 4: It's like, well, I'm not saying that. That's the prayer says that.

00:17:52
Speaker 2: Okay, Can I ask a question? Can I ask question for the futures?

00:17:56
Speaker 3: When people who are not with a reality star getting TIFFs, they just say, you know, they have their tiff and an hour later the tiff is over, like our tiff was over an hour later, wait wait wait wait, you didn't let me get.

00:18:12
Speaker 2: It out, and then we're on the boat water skiing.

00:18:14
Speaker 3: Our tip was like not even that big of a tiff, And can you not archive me next time?

00:18:22
Speaker 4: I can't promise you guys.

00:18:25
Speaker 2: Listen, what is this archive? What I mean?

00:18:27
Speaker 3: Okay, you can't even hurt me with archiving me if I don't if I don't even.

00:18:31
Speaker 2: Follow you, so I don't even know you archiving it doesn't hurt anybody, know.

00:18:36
Speaker 4: I was actually just trying to make myself feel better.

00:18:39
Speaker 3: Oh okay, because you can't screw somebody archiving them if they can't see your Instagram, I have nothing to do with you.

00:18:49
Speaker 1: This is can I tell you, it's like, it's like this you archived, because then when you're back on good terms, you just add them right back.

00:18:56
Speaker 4: They go right back into the same place. It's all good.

00:18:58
Speaker 3: Oh because of the article, because the OC and I again, you told me about the archive literally an hour after the tip was over, and and and the funny thing of it all is all these articles that friends of mine had sent us said you deleted.

00:19:15
Speaker 2: So I was like, she deleted, not deleted. It looks like a delete.

00:19:19
Speaker 4: It looks like a delete. But it's just an arch I know.

00:19:21
Speaker 3: But here's here's the thing. It doesn't affect me because I don't follow you and you don't follow me, so who are you.

00:19:27
Speaker 2: I'm trying not.

00:19:28
Speaker 4: To hurt anybody. It's to make myself feel better.

00:19:31
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, okay.

00:19:33
Speaker 4: Here's the thing.

00:19:34
Speaker 1: Most people, when they get in tips, they may be like, fuck this, I'm gonna go have a drink, fuck this, I'm gonna go do this or whatever it may be. Me, I'm like, you know what, my petty ass going to delete all his ship just for five minutes because that makes me feel.

00:19:47
Speaker 2: Empowerful a few hours whatever.

00:19:52
Speaker 4: I tell you.

00:19:52
Speaker 2: A lot of like as you came to me and then showed me that.

00:19:55
Speaker 1: By the way, there was this like Instagram with like naughty and a lot of followers, but I saw it so I just had to comment.

00:20:02
Speaker 4: And it was like.

00:20:04
Speaker 1: Welak had deleted all her pictures of rant And then the cousu was like, this is hurtful, and I was like, if this is hurtful, you're soft as fuck.

00:20:12
Speaker 2: Because that shit is not well.

00:20:14
Speaker 3: Let me say something to that Instagram. First of all, thank you for having my back. So whatever site that is, wait, wait, whatever site that is, I support you guys. Second of all, it wasn't hurtful, because how can it be hurtful.

00:20:25
Speaker 2: I didn't even know she had.

00:20:26
Speaker 3: Done that until one of my best friends sent me a few articles is like, are you guys okay? And I was like, well, we're on the boat right now and we're playing rummy cue, so I don't know, but I'm glad that helped you.

00:20:39
Speaker 1: I think everyone has their like I actually got a lot of people that were like, girl, I do that same thing all the time.

00:20:44
Speaker 2: Who does that?

00:20:46
Speaker 4: My fellow imagery people, No.

00:20:47
Speaker 3: I think that's you. I think you invented this. The only person I've never heard somebody archiving.

00:20:53
Speaker 2: Somebody, Well your oldest shit. Well that's why you are archiving me.

00:20:56
Speaker 4: I'm an art I'm young at shit, and I act that way.

00:21:00
Speaker 1: But bottom line is whatever if that's the most petty thing I do in my life, like I'm fucking chill in on it.

00:21:06
Speaker 2: Okay, So I respect you, Okay, whatever, Okay. So I just want to.

00:21:09
Speaker 3: Say a couple of things because I really am excited about this episode. So we're going to have to take a quick break again. We're going to come back with it.

00:21:18
Speaker 4: Let me say this before we move on.

00:21:20
Speaker 2: I want to talk about sobriety. Won't come back.

00:21:21
Speaker 4: No, we're going to talk about sobriety when we come back. But for my fellow chicks out there who want.

00:21:26
Speaker 1: To delete their man off their Instagram, just archive it because then you can add it back.

00:21:31
Speaker 4: I don't judge you. Let us have immature, petty moments like whatever.

00:21:35
Speaker 2: It is, what it is, Okay.

00:21:36
Speaker 3: I'm glad that we don't follow each other, because I think if I had seen that on your ground, I'm glad we don't follow.

00:21:42
Speaker 4: Each other either.

00:21:43
Speaker 1: No, I could only see so many of your mugshot pictures that you.

00:21:46
Speaker 2: Take Okay, now you're being seen. Now, now you're being petty.

00:21:50
Speaker 3: So what I might do now is I might delete, not even archive your shit.

00:21:56
Speaker 2: I'm going to delete them all.

00:21:58
Speaker 3: Because that's I want to get back at you.

00:22:00
Speaker 2: No, I'm not going to do that because I don't I wouldn't have any followers if I did that.

00:22:04
Speaker 4: We'll be right back.

00:22:09
Speaker 2: And we're back.

00:22:09
Speaker 3: I'm running the interview now because I'm going to ask a little bit for a few minutes here with you.

00:22:14
Speaker 4: You're going to interview.

00:22:15
Speaker 3: Yeah, I want to just ask you a little bit about your sobriety, because first of all, I think that people don't.

00:22:19
Speaker 2: Realize that the fact, first of all.

00:22:22
Speaker 3: You've been sober a year and nine months, so three more months we're going to hit two years, which is a milestone. I tell you, I don't care what company you're building, how much you know success or money you make, how many TV shows you do, produce, star, none of that's important to me. Your sobriety, to me is going to always for me be the thing that I cannot believe. And I'm so proud of what you've done and what you do, and people don't realize. I mean, people are sober, realizing people who have family and friends who are sober. But I think unless you really know the amount of work that I see you do, and.

00:23:02
Speaker 2: I'm talking about every day.

00:23:03
Speaker 3: Every day you're either reading, working with, you know, people that your sponsor, You're on Zoom meetings, you're you know, you're going to meetings obviously pre COVID. So I just need to give you the acknowledgment that I am very, very proud of your sobriety and the person that you've become through your sobriety.

00:23:23
Speaker 2: So I always want you to know that thank you.

00:23:25
Speaker 3: The question I have is for somebody who doesn't know sobriety in that respect, does it get easier? Like from day one to today? Was you know, because I never asked you that, like six months in where you like I got this, or a year in where you like or is it just always a working problem.

00:23:47
Speaker 2: I'm curious the.

00:23:49
Speaker 3: Evolution from where you started to where you are today. How to it change or how does it I don't.

00:23:55
Speaker 4: Think that it ever gets easier.

00:23:57
Speaker 1: They're like, I'm a conqueror, you know, Like I conquered drinking. I was the fucking best at it. The daunting thing about sobriety is that it can never be conquered. Whether you have sixty days of sobriety or sixty years of sobriety, there's one thing that could send you back to square one.

00:24:17
Speaker 4: You have to work every single day, and it.

00:24:20
Speaker 1: Can be the disease can never be beat. So for me, I wouldn't say that it gets easier for me. It just it's my routine. And I would be lying if I said there haven't been times where I've been fixated on a bottle of wine. The difference now is that I think before I do. I know that I've worked extremely hard to get to this place, and I pick up the damn phone and I call my fucking sponsor.

00:24:50
Speaker 3: If you're having a moment where you're saying, my thoughts are going in the old place that I used to go, So now you're saying, Okay, I have the tools, I know what to do, and I've I've learned that what I need to do if I get to that point where I'm starting to think the wrong thoughts basically.

00:25:07
Speaker 2: Right, But that's that's a huge job.

00:25:08
Speaker 3: But so clearly in the first thirty or sixty days, I mean, I was there obviously and I know how hard you've worked, but I mean, you know, it seems and again this is just I'm with you every day.

00:25:21
Speaker 2: It seems that you talk about it a lot less meaning when this is what I remember.

00:25:26
Speaker 3: The first thirty, first ninety days, you talked about everything we did.

00:25:31
Speaker 2: It was about you know.

00:25:32
Speaker 1: Because at that point in time, my identity was I'm sober.

00:25:36
Speaker 4: That consumed one hundred percent of my identity.

00:25:39
Speaker 1: Whereas to learn the new right, Whereas now it's like I'm laala, I come from Utah, I do this and oh, by the way.

00:25:48
Speaker 2: I don't.

00:25:48
Speaker 4: I don't dream right. Not only do I not, but I'm sober.

00:25:52
Speaker 2: Right.

00:25:52
Speaker 1: So a lot of people have like said to me, not a lot of people, but there have been a few people that have written comments say, if you smoking dope, does it mean you sober? And I want to make it very clear, I don't smoke weed anymore.

00:26:05
Speaker 4: I've never done a drug in my life, and I don't drink. And there is nothing that I put in my body that changes.

00:26:12
Speaker 2: Your mental stay, your mental stack.

00:26:14
Speaker 1: My reality is always this is just a clear picture.

00:26:18
Speaker 3: And I will say I've been there every day with you, and you are a one year and nine months, no weed, no drink, no anything. And even when it gets really rough for you or you've had some rough days where challenging days like we all have, whether it be in the relationship, or it be at home with your own family, or be with work. I have seen you have challenging days. I've been part of those challenging days, and at the end of the day, you've always your sobriety is.

00:26:49
Speaker 2: Always number one. I mean in terms of so it's very impressive.

00:26:52
Speaker 1: My sobriety and God are my number one priorities.

00:26:56
Speaker 4: They come before you, they come before my mind.

00:26:59
Speaker 2: You just said your priority is God. I'm here.

00:27:04
Speaker 4: Some sacrilegious ship head.

00:27:06
Speaker 2: He's going to smite you. But what I mean is no, I understand it's number one.

00:27:12
Speaker 1: It's number one because without God and without not sober and without sobriety, I am not useful or anyone else in my life. So those two things have to go hand in hand.

00:27:24
Speaker 2: And I respect that.

00:27:25
Speaker 3: And I by the way, there's been many days where you said to me, you know, either a you need like earlier on in the process, and it's only a year, nine months, and I know, to me, that's a tremendous amount of time. But I know in the program, you guys don't look you know, you're not looking at that way. You always tell me you're like one day at a time.

00:27:41
Speaker 2: You don't.

00:27:42
Speaker 4: But we don't say I'm almost two your sober. We say I am a year, nine months, six days sober.

00:27:48
Speaker 2: Right, and and not a day more. But but it is impressive.

00:27:53
Speaker 3: But because I do remember earlier on some things where like we would be at an event or something and you would say, okay, it's a twelve thirty, that's enough for me, time to go home, Like you you kind of knew today, I feel like you're you just want to go home because you can't stand the event or at your bored.

00:28:09
Speaker 1: What the thing is about that is like I'll be at an event and people will be drinking and like coming up to me and they'll lean more alcohol, and I'm looking around and I'm like, I'm seeing what's happening, and like y'all have peaked like that.

00:28:21
Speaker 4: It's not I'm seeing it. It ain't that fun, Like.

00:28:25
Speaker 3: I'm watching it and the hangovers are and the hangovers are horrible.

00:28:29
Speaker 4: It's time for me to go home.

00:28:30
Speaker 1: And people ask me how I stay sober, and I have to attribute that.

00:28:35
Speaker 4: I know that the program I'm in is anonymous.

00:28:38
Speaker 1: And I would never tell anybody who I see in my program. But for me, the program is not just about not picking up a drink, and I've learned this sadly. It took me up until recently to realize me not picking up a drink is not the full picture.

00:28:56
Speaker 4: It's about becoming.

00:28:57
Speaker 1: A better human being because my behavior, on many occasions, I may not be intoxicated, but my behavior is drunk. So that's a big reason why I call my sponsor and I said, I need to go back to Step whatever, because I don't want to be this version of myself where like someone says the wrong thing and I'm fucking popping off at them, acting like, you know, like my mouth is drunk, my mind is still drunk, and the program is about breaking those habits.

00:29:30
Speaker 3: Well, I am as you know, you're a biggest fan when it comes to the Well, I'm your biggest fan period because I love you and you're my best friend. But I'm also a biggest fan because I can't believe the commitment that you made a year and nine months ago, six days and how you have honored that for yourself. And nobody told you to go get sober. Nobody said, Lalla, this is it. Nobody threatened you to do that. You just woke up and you said, this is the only choice I have. And I remember you came to the office and told me that, and then you went straight to start the program.

00:30:02
Speaker 2: And here we are.

00:30:03
Speaker 3: So I commend you and I give you mad love in that respect, and I always want I tell you every day how proud I.

00:30:09
Speaker 2: Am of you.

00:30:10
Speaker 4: Well, thank you.

00:30:10
Speaker 1: And on a lighter note, yes, note, I want to read some voicemails. Again, my advice to anybody who is trying to get sober, if you're trying to lead the type of life or be on the path that I am on, if the program is intimidating to you, I would recommend just going and picking up the big book and just highlighting and making notes of things that resonate with you and go from there. I know it can be very overwhelming, but that is my piece of advice. All right, let's go to some voice mails to lighten this friggin mood.

00:30:50
Speaker 6: Hi, Lala and Randall, this is Chelsea calling from southern California. I just want to say, I absolutely love your podcast. I literally look forward to it every single Wenesday. Hey, it gets me through work and definitely through these crazy times. One question, This is going to be so basic, but I don't care on basic af and I really do want to know what are some of your guys's similarities, Like what are some things that you and Rand blah blah, you and Rand like just you have in common, Like some things that you're just like obsess over together and you love it. And then also counter question like what are your differences like what is something that you absolutely love to do that Rand can't stand and vice versa. I want to know about both of you. Thank you guys so much for putting out such amazing content or content.

00:31:38
Speaker 2: I love you guys.

00:31:39
Speaker 4: Okay, bis well, this one is hard.

00:31:42
Speaker 2: Not really what this one's good? I like this question.

00:31:46
Speaker 3: So the things that opposite in terms of an activity, okay, is I'm obsessed with poker and you cannot stand it.

00:31:55
Speaker 4: No, I hate it.

00:31:56
Speaker 3: I think it's stupid, right, but it's actually really high level mental game.

00:32:00
Speaker 2: But okay, we know that, and you've made that clear everywhere we go.

00:32:04
Speaker 3: But so that's one thing that we have a different song, But she does support me, and she does come out and she'll do commentary and make an appearance and promote the game for me, and it's really nice and sweet.

00:32:15
Speaker 2: So that's something that I feel like very different.

00:32:17
Speaker 3: But but and on the flip side of that is she obsesses over Real Housewives of Every City and watches it on rerun for hours at a time and commandeers the TV. And so that is something I have zero interest in and have to tolerate. So we both have those things. But what do we have in common? I mean, I think we have everything in common. I mean, we're very different people, but we have obviously the same loves and passions. I mean, we both love each other and that's something that we put a lot of time in. We both care about family, and she, you know, cares very much about you know, she's a family person.

00:32:58
Speaker 2: She's very close with her mom and her.

00:33:00
Speaker 3: Brother, and she loves my children, you know, And and and so I think family is very important.

00:33:05
Speaker 2: Her family is very important to me, and we work hard at that.

00:33:08
Speaker 3: And then and then the other thing I would say that we're very similar in terms of activities is we're equally obsessed with pickleball, but that's on an athletic.

00:33:18
Speaker 2: I wouldn't call my ability athletic very athletic.

00:33:21
Speaker 1: When you do it, you're really good, Okay, serve as like that of a professional.

00:33:24
Speaker 4: Ben jonce told me that.

00:33:26
Speaker 3: Okay, so probably aside from that, not that athletic. But but the thing is is that I think that.

00:33:32
Speaker 1: Her and I we're both goers, like we like to travel and we like adventures.

00:33:36
Speaker 3: Yeah, we like to That's a good one, you tell you, yeah, because I think that's from your perspectives.

00:33:41
Speaker 1: Where you can sit there and be like, hey, I was thinking we're going to just like r V exactly.

00:33:47
Speaker 3: And at the same time, I know, but but I think, yeah, I think we both love to travel, we both love adventure. I think we're not afraid of the unknown, and even if we are, we'll just that she.

00:33:57
Speaker 1: Said what we both obsess over and I think we're pretty obsessed with each other, which is a good thing.

00:34:03
Speaker 2: Yeah, what did you just say?

00:34:05
Speaker 4: You're obsessed with me?

00:34:07
Speaker 2: You live for me?

00:34:09
Speaker 4: Okay, I agree, I just said that.

00:34:11
Speaker 3: Okay, you're the one that's Is this another petty thing where you're gonna archive me?

00:34:14
Speaker 2: I'm just curious.

00:34:16
Speaker 4: I don't know.

00:34:17
Speaker 1: Maybe don't funk around and then you want have to find out next question.

00:34:20
Speaker 4: Thanks voicemail.

00:34:22
Speaker 7: Hey La Law and Randal. I just want to say that you guys truly, truly crack me up, whether I'm driving cleaning the house, I seriously laugh out loud listening to you guys.

00:34:34
Speaker 6: I also just had a.

00:34:35
Speaker 7: Question for you guys. I am afraid of flying, and I just wanted to know if you guys had any tips on I truly want to travel and go to different places. So what is your advice on that? Love you guys, shout out from Ohio.

00:34:52
Speaker 2: That's a good question.

00:34:53
Speaker 4: This is a good one for you.

00:34:55
Speaker 2: Yeah. So, so I am.

00:34:57
Speaker 3: The people don't believe this because I travel more than most people travel, you know, ever, and they should never travel as much as I've had to travel. But so I have the biggest fear of flying, and through that fear, I have an obsession for aviation, So I know every I mean, I study airplane disasters and accidents and all this stuff. And I've made friends with many many pilots over the years. And so here's what I'll say. I helped two of my friends overcome their fear of flying. Two of my friends my friend Craig Gestelle, who's an agent William Morris. I helped him. He had not flown, and I convinced and got in the fly on a private plane with me to overcome his fear.

00:35:40
Speaker 2: And here's what I'll say. I am the worst flyer, but.

00:35:43
Speaker 3: Because I'm so educated, I'm able to fly as much as I do. So all I'm going to say is this, And pilots tell me this. The air when it starts to get turbulent, you just got to think of it as like waves in the ocean or bumps on the road. The plane is not going to crash, you know, through turbulence. I mean, it's just it's the chances are, you know, very very point zero zeros are a one percent.

00:36:09
Speaker 4: Don't you have a higher chance of dying in a car per.

00:36:11
Speaker 3: Yes, you do have a higher chance, they say in a car dying in a car crash than you would in an airplane. Here's what I'll say, do not let life go by because of your fear.

00:36:25
Speaker 2: You know they have fear of flying.

00:36:26
Speaker 3: Courses that you can do online, I would definitely suggest doing it.

00:36:30
Speaker 2: It is unbelievable.

00:36:31
Speaker 3: They really explain to you the mechanics of airplanes so that you understand how well they're built. They explain to you weather and turbulence and heat and winds, just so that you don't get nerves when you fly. And I just want to say other thing, fear of flying. They're the best courses in the world. And then go with one of your best friends, somebody you trust. And I'm telling you this, somebody you trust, one of your best friends.

00:36:53
Speaker 2: And here's what I recommend. Go on a thirty minute flight.

00:36:58
Speaker 3: Take a thirty minute flight from once to another small city so that you know you're just going to go up and write down.

00:37:04
Speaker 2: Basically, and do that to start.

00:37:06
Speaker 3: Then try an hour flight then you know what I mean, and work your way to know and get that comfort if you're that because I understand because I am very scared of flying. But you know, it is a beautiful thing and an immagical thing. You just have to, you know, work yourself through it.

00:37:21
Speaker 1: Okay, Randall is very passionate about I know.

00:37:24
Speaker 4: I can I tell you.

00:37:25
Speaker 1: I saw I heard that voicemail and I was like, oh, Randal's going to go crazy over there, and I.

00:37:30
Speaker 2: Can do a whole episode. You know what we're going to do I just came with a great idea.

00:37:33
Speaker 3: I know LS gonna be like, oh my god, another idea for another episode.

00:37:37
Speaker 2: We are going to do a fear of flying episode.

00:37:40
Speaker 3: Now, I'm going to bring our pilot, Okay, Eddie and his wife.

00:37:44
Speaker 4: I love that.

00:37:45
Speaker 2: Right.

00:37:45
Speaker 3: We're going to have them for one segment talk about talk about their experience at flying. And we're also going to bring on an expert aviation specialist in who specializes in the fear of flying. Because you know what, I think this is great for everybody, no matter how much you fly or don't fly.

00:38:02
Speaker 2: It's interesting.

00:38:04
Speaker 1: That's actually a really great idea we're doing that.

00:38:07
Speaker 4: No, I really love it.

00:38:08
Speaker 2: Okay.

00:38:08
Speaker 1: And by the way, if you do have a fear of flying, also just like pack some zequil in your bag and take that before you get on the plane.

00:38:15
Speaker 4: It's alcohol free.

00:38:17
Speaker 1: Oh really, it's like a nat I don't want to see natural, but it's a sleep aid. I know this because I just do take some zquil and knock yourself out.

00:38:26
Speaker 4: That's what I'll say.

00:38:27
Speaker 2: Okay, I disagree with that.

00:38:28
Speaker 4: I think I have a fear of flying.

00:38:31
Speaker 3: No, yeah, but for somebody like me, it's like I want to know everything that's going on on the plane.

00:38:37
Speaker 2: Right.

00:38:38
Speaker 3: Yes, there's no chance I'm going to sleep. By the way, I'm the kind of guy that when I fly from LA to London, which is a ten hour flight through the middle of the night, I'm generally up ninety percent of the flight.

00:38:49
Speaker 2: So listen. But I agree with LAWA.

00:38:51
Speaker 3: If you're not afraid of things, but if you are, have the fear. It is a real fear. You're suspended at thirty eight thousand and forty three thousand feet and it's scary if it's something that you hear.

00:39:02
Speaker 2: So any we're dedicating the next next episode to you.

00:39:05
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, Randall's two passions fear of flying and poker. All right, all right, you guys, this was an awesome podcast. Thank you for tuning in to another episode of Give Them Well Up with Randall and we will catch you next week.