Victoria P. Addresses Boyfriend Allegations and Her Time on ‘Bachelor in Paradise’

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Speaker 1: Welcome back Bachelor Happy Hour listeners. You guys, Holy crap. I know we warned you last week that we're gonna have two nights of Paradise, and I felt like it was two weeks packed into two episodes. This week was crazy. So much happened. But before we get into all of that, please welcome one of my best friends, my incredible co host, Tea. Thank you for coming back. I'm glad that I didn't scare you away last week. Thank you, Thank you so much. Yeah, I did not expect the episodes to be this hot and heavy, this quick. If I wasn't taking notes, I would legitimately forget what the hell happened because there was so much. There's so much, it's like I have notes, Like if you guys could see my notes right now, I'm like starring everything of points that I really want to hit, and I know that we're not even gonna get around to half of it. But I gotta start with this because this week we see Demi come in, you know, and she comes in hot, and I want to do the same for this podcast, and so you know what, We're gonna come in with the big D energy, the Big Demi energy, that's how she walked down onto the beach. She already was stirring the pot before. She talks to everyone, but it was girls. They wouldn't take their men. I love Demi. I mean, okay, listen, I've known Demi for a while now, I freaking love her. I know she probably rubs people the wrong way and we're gonna have a lot of viewers and listeners, you know, saying whatever mean things you want to say. But Demi is Demi, and she just owns the ship out of who she is, and I'm here for it is. I love it so entertaining. If we didn't have Demi right now, it wouldn't be the same. It wouldn't be paradise without her. So, yeah, we see her kick it off? Was it? This was the first date of the week right where she takes Brendan. Yeah, she came in with a day card. Came in with a day card. It takes Brendan. I mean, you know, I, oh god, this is what I wanted to say. T I didn't even write this in my notes for the dates that we saw this week on the beach. Well, I told you this because we were in quarantine together. But this is why I love having the podcast because we can give actual behind the scenes of like our side of things, and even though we're not there yet. We were in quarantine and I was watching all of these dates go on outside of my hotel room and listen. The video card was one that was one that was the first date I saw, because I got told to go into my room because something might be happening on the beach, and of course I don't listen. So I was sitting on my balcony, I had my big sunglasses on, I had one of those hair wraps. I was kind of like trying to live out what was happening on the dates and having a conversation and um, and so maybe if you all all are lucky, I will share the true behind the scenes of what you actually didn't see. I saw Demi and Brendan's and I saw Thomas and Serena. They were they were a little bit farther down on the beach, so at first I didn't know it was Thomas and Serena until they walked closer in front of my balcony. UM. And in that case, I felt kind of creepy because I felt like it was like a dad and his daughter because of the height difference, size the size difference I was at first, I was like, who the hell is this? Um yeah, but who brought daddy? Daddy? Who brought a chaperone to Paradise? Um? No, So that's like, it's so funny now actually watching these dates back and hearing the conversation and what all went down, because I had something totally different in my mind. But I will say I didn't know it was Demi and Brendan because I mean, Brandon, you can just sell from the hair. And the second I heard Demi laugh on the beach, I was like, oh, that's my baby. Um shot that. Demmi was so smitten kitten so fast with Brendan and was bummed out that he said he wanted to continue to talk to other people. I've never seen Demmy like that, or I just I haven't either, I think. But here's the thing, and Demi, I love you, but I don't think she's used to people not being anyone saying no, anyone saying no, and so I think that was the first time where she was really like, well, what the hell I brought you on this date? I took you out, you know, And so yeah, um, she I don't blame her for feeling like that. She's like, why did I waste this date with you for you to say that? But it's the eyes, you know, Demmy ain't gonna let that get her down here, No, not for long. But but it's the eyes. Brendan has these like, oh, piercing blue ocean blue eyes that just kind of like like the ocean, it sucks you in. And so I get it. I mean, like all of the all of the women so far mesmerized by Brendan and Demi, you know, she couldn't resist the charm. Speaking of Brendan, we hear a lot of chit chat behind the scenes about a potential relationship that he has back home with Piper, which I'm thinking like some foreshadowing there, But he's not the only one that people are talking about that may be in a relationship with somebody else. Fast around that damn beach. Oh yeah, two seconds. It's like the fastest game of telephone you've ever played. Speaking of foreshadowing for relationships that people may have before coming to Paradise, I will say we do have a guest coming on very shortly, and that is Victoria Paul. Victoria p because she was somebody else who was in the midst of certain allegations, and we're going to have run very soon after we recap, just so she can give her side of things, say her piece, kind of maybe put some of those rumors to bed. If if they aren't put to go bed, who knows, We will find out very soon. Let's just kind of recab give our main takeaways. I mean, drama with Victoria pe she goes home, We see Kelsey go home, and who else went home? Victoria l the goddess. I'm honestly really sad because I wanted to meet her so bad. You were saying that, Yeah, I would just love to be in her presence in person. Back to Serena see though, trying to hop on erin to get to stay and I'm like, no, shame girl listening everyone would he immediately made out with Tammy right out. Oh gosh, damn. It's so interesting because I'm not the type of person to like throw a hail Mary pass and like try to do what I can to solidify anything. I feel like I'm you know, I would be more of like a Kelsey where it's like, if it happens, it happens. If it doesn't, fuck it, who cares. But it's interesting to see how people handle their business in these pressure situations, knowing that, you know, for women are going to be going home. Um so we see a couple of women go home. We see some new sexy eye candy come down to the beach. We have Thomas, we have Riley and ry I'm surprised Riley's arms fit through the Gates of Paradise because can I just say too that they look big and buff and huge on TV? But in person, person who listen, listen, dude like Thomas kept talking about his height, but so did we, so did we and we got and I mean Riley also knows his arms are like bazookas. They're not just the big guns, they are bazookas his chest like these dudes in person. Holy freaking craps. There's a rumor that Riley smashed a watermelon with one bicept. And this is the content that we need to see. We need this. Speaking of like hot steamy things, I got to get into this state with Riley and Marissa um can I. All I wrote down for my notes for the state was just straight sex, like hot steamy hot, SA texted me and she goes like, good lord, you guys, this date has me fired up. I mean it just is so abruptly give it to me. But it was hot and steemy for some people, but it was also sad boys summer for others. I mean, we see Joe down in the dums, we see Connor down in the dumes. We see Connor basing the beach and writing songs for Marissa, like she's going to come back and still be with him, and like, listen, Connor, I applaud the dedication, the enthusiasm, the passion that you still have for Marissa. But like Riley's arms, yeah, that's all I got to say, no, no, And like it's so hard because you want to fill for him, but you want to root for her at the same time. This is tricky. Gosh, um love Masa Marissa though she just I loved it all out there. Oh she's my favorite. She. I absolutely adore Marissa. And one thing that we can't forget about is we get a new I was gonna say, Judge, is this not really that kind of show? We get a new guest host, and I am so upset that we were there for this entrance because also, okay, so we see Lance Bass as the next guest host. But like when they start playing that old boombox with n SYNC, people were kind of dancing a little bit. Oh my godda. If we were there, I would have been. I would have been the whole dance. I would have been on my head spitting on the ground like I would do. Yeah, the Marionettes, whatever we gotta do. We like people. You guys did not fully appreciate all that end Sync and last Lance Bass had to offer him. Was there, No, they needed us, they needed us. Connor was into it. He was the only one who I think knew all the lyrics, he knew the dance moves. Um, thank you Connor for that, because we needed that. Lance needed that. But oh my god, the girls when they sat down and they had a mimosa with mister Lance Bass, I was like, are you fucking kidding me? Like the backs of my kneecaps would have been sweating. I would have. I would have been, so I would have been like, I don't even want to date any of these other men. I know I'm not I'm not Lance's type, and I don't care he can give me a rose. I know, yeah, seriously hit that falsetto god fucking weird. Oh my god, just wait you guys, do you I could go on and on about it. I think everything just wait till we hit the beach, because we're gonna have so much more behind the scenes, so much more tea, so much more everything that we can give you. But until then, which I don't even know what that happens, because for one week, I feel like we've been watching seventeen years full of this already. But a lot went down, and I think we just have to bring on our guest right now because a lot went down with her, and we want to allow her the chance to take the mic, to say what she has to say and to clear up any confusion that we all may have of if there was a boyfriend, if there was a dog, if there was a music career to be enhanced. Right now, So with help further ado, ladies and gentlemen, let's please welcome Victoria P to Batch a Happy Hour. We have the woman of the hour here, Victoria P. Before we start, Victoria, welcome. Do you want me to keep the pea on your name or just call you a straight Victoria Honestly, you can call me anything as long as it's nice. My friends call me VP initials, So whatever you want, Okay, Okay, well I'll call you VP. But sometimes I then think I'm talking about the vice president, Madame vice President. Um, okay, so we'll just call you Victoria. I was gonna say Vicky for some reason, like VICKI like Vicky. No, Okay. The teacher in sixth grade that so we had like got to this debate that my skirt was too short and that it was like distracting to boys, and I had a whole debate with her like, well, shouldn't you be teaching the boys like that, Women's bodies aren't I was in sixth grade. Five. Ever since then, I'm like, Vicky, don't call me Vicky. Okay, No, Vicky. I like that you'd just story attached to it. Well, welcome to batch our happy hour, Victoria. This is the first time we've actually had you because we unfortunately did not speak with you during Peter's season. There's just so much craziness going on. But since leaving Mexico and now being back in the real world and watching everything back, how have you been? It was a lot you know, I was only on the beach for two nights, like thirty six hours, and a lot happened there. I'm obviously disappointed and like some of the things that I heard that we're said. But each person has their own own I guess they have their own idea of what happens, and I think that's based on assumptions. And I kind of wish that, I really wish that that had been asked the questions and been able to address the concerns, but I really wasn't given that opportunity. And yeah, well we'll get into all of that too, because we do have some questions around you know, the drama that we saw and fold. Let's take it back from the beginning, because you know, day one, you get there, you're one of the first people on the b too, were there since the beginning. It's exciting. You don't know what to expect. What how did you feel walking down those steps, you know, meeting David Spade and then meeting the original cast that first day, So walking down the stay ups, I was super excited, optimistic, like, let's freaking do this thing. I'm one hundred percent ready. I'm super excited to meet to meet the new girls to meet the guys, and I was really stoked and was a huge fan of Joe Dirk. So I feel like excited. I already asked to a good start. Yeah, and so the you know, because we didn't see you really in much of the drama and tell Monday in nets episode. So I'm assuming the first couple days, well day, I mean, I know TV time is much different than real lifetime, but it seemed like smooth sailing. It seemed like that first day you were talking to James, you had a little bit of a connection. What was that like for you. Yeah, like I said, I was, I was only there for two nights at thirty six hours, so and first getting there, I'm super excited and optimistic, and right away I didn't feel like I feel like typically in my real life I feel connected. It's like an instant connection whenever I connect with someone, and I didn't feel that. So I was kind of like hmmm. And then the guys, because they had the roses, were like expecting the girls to go to them, and I'm like, no, I feel like a man to pursue me. And so I was kind of like waiting for that, and and I ended up actually, I think like talking to James myself, like just being like, Okay, I've got to do this, I've got to got to get out there and so and so I did and such a great guy, super sweet. I was kind of I was actually really excited in the beginning, and then I just kind of started like I was like, Okay, I found myself kind of like I was having to convince myself that I was feeling something that I wasn't and then I started to kind of be like okay, and is like, there's nothing wrong with this guy. He's great, he's a hunk, but like, like not the note that it was by default, But did you feel like since there were so many other couples making connections, Yeah, James's single, I'll talk to him well that you you know, there's nothing wrong with him. He's a great guy. But it's like you don't want to feel that instant yeah with James, I and just with anyone on the beach. I think that I try to go in with no expectations, but typically like if I'm gaining someone, there's either an instant connection there's not. And I didn't feel that that spark and that instant connection with him, and so right away I was like, oh shit, like oh no, but I also was like, okay, Victoria, you've known this guy for twenty four hours, give it a shot. You're here, like there could be someone else that comes down the beach, And then there was really no one else that I felt like I was really all guys were great but attracted to and so yeah, I just like took some time to get to know him. A wonderful guy, but there are a lot of wonderful people that just aren't compatible, and right I just I think ultimately I I wasn't ready because we've all been there, right, Like we've all done the show. We've all been on the badge short and now you know, cuts out of the bag. We've all been on paradise for some sort of time. And it's this weird situation where, you know, playing off of what Tia was just saying, where it's like, you know, there's already couples established. You want to get to a certain point. You obviously don't want things to feel forced, but to continue week by week and day by day, you need to form some sort of connection. So it's just this weird situation, like I would say, social experiment to see who hits it off, and if you felt like, you know, because we've all met James, James is great, He's such a good dude. But if you just feel like that passion, that chemistry wasn't there, Yeah, you can't force it. Was there. Anyone that you were hoping would be on the beach that didn't that you didn't see walk down those steps that first week, or that you see come later, that you wished you would have been able to meet. You know, I really think that that band guy what's his name, y'all, I'm that was named Oh yeah, the other day I called I'm like, I called my doctor, Am I having a stroke? Like, I just my mom's name is Cindy and I called her Sydney. I'm like my mother, I'm like, so big, nothing personal against Jay said, yeah, no, it wasn't it with her own mom. It's the thing it was. I it was concerning you did forget James's name quite a few times a lot. But listen, I understand, especially when you're filming. I mean, from somebody who forgot one of the guy's names on my season on a group date in front of everybody, I get it. There's a lot of everyone else's name. Everyone else is saying besides someone Ta was on that date too. She was there and witnessed it. So so so we get it. So Ben Ben from UM from California from Clarentatious season correct and Smith I think it is his name. Actually googled him a while ago because I was like, they're gonna ask me his name, and I need to make sure I get it right. Ben's okay, workout there all right? M okay? So yeah, because I know that they always ask all of the casts coming down, Okay, who do you really want to see here? Like who do you think you could hit it off with? So I actually love asking everyone that question because it's so funny when some people say that the same one guy over and over and over. So but I but I really hearty fighting over this man. I haven't heard Ben yet, So this is this is great. Um, well, who knows. I mean, I'm not gonna give anything away. Who knows if Ben's walks down onto that beach or now? But um, okay, so we see, let's just get into it a little bit because you were part of some of the drama that night before the first row of ceremony goes down to recap briefly basically, you know, we see you and James chatting, and then we see Kelsey and Tammy talking about that you may or may not have a boyfriend back home back in Nashville, and they can well, I wouldn't say they confront They confront James about it, and then he confronts you about it. So when all of that is going down, did you know when James pulled you what he was going to be chatting with you about. Did you have any idea that this allegation would be circling on the beach? I was completely, honestly, completely blindsided. So I present that I was completely blindsided. Whenever James pulled me aside and asked about it. I just I Kelsey and Tammy were both like, I mean for my season, and so I just I think that my expectation would have been, like, Okay, if there's an issue or if they had some kind of a concern, like they would have come to me and like and said something, I want to give you the mic for a second and cleared the air and put any rumors to bed, if we will, Because I know there's a lot circulating right now. So did you or did you not have a boyfriend coming into Paradise. No, I started dating a guy, and well, I moved to Nashville in January, and New Paradise was a thing, right. It was something that I wanted to do and I was really excited about and I was not and I was dating anyone. I was like, I'm not dating anybody. And the guy that I end up getting in a relationship with, I try to set him up with one of my friends. I'm like, I'm not dating anyone. Like I put this guy off, I'm like no, and he asked me to get a drink with him. So I end up going. We become really close as like best friends, and then it just developed into something more unintentionally and it was happens and yeah, and so that's I think part of the reason why going like on Paradise was kind of difficult because I'm like, typically like and my relationships in the past, it's just been like, I'm gonna get to know you, You're gonna get to know me, and then and there's no pressure. But if it like if we connect and it takes off great, And so I think with the James sing like you have to be so intentional, and there's such like a pressure to like rush, and that anxiety was like really alive in me. Right. But back to that, that relationship, Paradise was always something that we knew was a very strong possibility. Like I said day one, I was very honest with him. We talked about it, and whenever we had only been dating like two and a half months, right and Paradise, it's like, Okay, I have to make a decision. And I think that probably the weight of whether Paradise Paradise is going to be a thing or not, like weight heavy on our relationship. Like he wasn't at he didn't ask me to stay, and it was just like you should do, like you should go, and I encourage you to follow your heart or whatever, like we haven't been dating long, you know, like, and I think that he probably was trying to give me his blessing, but to me, it was like he doesn't. He's like he wouldn't fully commit, right, And when someone won't fully commit naturally, it's like, okay, well, if you're not gonna be all in, then maybe I should um two other options. Yeah, And so we ended up having a conversation and he actually, um, this was like four like a month or four parais It's just like two months into dating and he broke up with me and was like, I just feel like you've got your own thing going on Paradise. It's like this huge weight on us whether you're going to go, whether you or not, like, you know, are we serious enough for you to stay? Are you gonna have regrets if you stay? M you know, if we don't work out because our relationship is so fresh. And actually the night that he broke up with me, I stayed at Kelsey's house. So um so, so if he broke up with you and you then went on to Paradise to you know, pursue whatever potential relationship could be there. When all of this was going to on with Tammy and Kelsey telling James and you know, talking about how you were going to boost this guy's music career, whatever was said, why wouldn't you at that point just be like, well, he broke up with me, this finished a month prior to this. You know, he ended things and that's why I'm here. Why didn't you just say that something similar to like where did they get that information? Or like where would they come up with this in the first place. You know, if you guys have been broken up, does that make sense? Yeah? No, absolutely, um, you know naturally, like I whenever a conflict arises, like and I've done a lot of therapy and I I mean, you guys see me on Peter season. Whenever a conflict happens with the lea, like, I just completely shut down and I it's like my nervous system it's just completely overstimulated, and I just feel like fight or flight and I don't know what to say, and a lot of time that just cry. And so that's been something that I've really worked on through therapy and setting healthy boundaries and communicating through conflict. And so at the time, whenever all that's happening, I don't like honestly, like until watching the episode and kind of hearing what happens, I like, I don't even remember what I said, like because I was remember being so like, okay, I just gotta like I've got to remember my therapy techniques. I can walk away and set a healthy boundary. Like my personal relationships are personal to me, you know, the it's no one's business unless they're part of it. Had Kelsey or Tammy asked me, kind of are been like, Hey, how are you feeling? Are been around when I was having the conversations like with Deandra or heard my interviews the whole time, I'm like, I I'm questioning, like, you know, if I if I'm ready for this? So if I'm not, you know, I from the moment that probably before James James and I kissed, but definitely after that. Um, so it wasn't It wasn't a secret. I just didn't feel comfortable sharing that with people. I didn't feel comfortable sharing it with and Kelsey and Tammy never asked, so they just assumed. So why do you think they brought up the boyfriend at home thing? Because that's that's completely normal to feel like, you know, what am I doing here? Why did I do this? I don't have this instant connection with anyone. That's completely normal. If you have a connection with somebody, I think everyone still questions what the hell am I doing here? Well, okay, well that makes me. I'm glad you said that because I was like, bro, like, I don't like this. I need to get back home to the people that I love, like that can pourant to me. And because I am my therapist because it's like, I'm not made for this. I'm not made for these freaking mosquitoes and this heat, and literally I was sweating my titties off, like actually, no, I feel that. No, but actually one of my implants when I got home, it was like deflating. It was okay, literally swetted my titty off. So on Monday, I have surgery that morning to remove my implants. So, oh my god. Okay, so you can neverification in Mexico in the future. Keep that in mind. I mean one of them. I was like, truly, my mom was My mom was so funny. She was like, you literally swetted your titties off. I was like, And my grandma was like, oh my god, I'm so glad that didn't happen when you were there, Like it would have been so bad. I would have been so embarrassed. I'm like, yeah, literally smell worried. So anyway, um, yeah, right now we're just being compy and cozy and having the girls. So let me ask you this because basically I have a two part question here. But first I want to get into because when all of this is being brought up on the beach about you having this said boyfriend back home. One of the allegations was that you came on because you would have a bigger platform to be able to promote his music. And then also there was something there was some story with the dog of you guys had a dog or we're watching the dog by the way. Well, I will say, at the dog really quick, I got the dog for me. It was like a rescue right. The dog fell in love with the boyfriend. The boyfriend fell in love with the dog immediately, So we share the dog, and him and I are even now like great friends. I will say, the guy that I was dating before the show we broke up, wanted nothing to do with this, like specifically asked that his name was not brought up. And because I think that and like, and that's kind of like part of the reason why I think that I protected it. I tried to. I did my best, like to protect that like when I was there, you know, and sharing with the people that I felt like I could trust was and that already kind of had an idea about it was because it really wasn't anyone else that's business. And I didn't want to make it a thing because him and I dated for two and a half months. Yes we share a dog together. But like I think, just as a viewer, like to touch on what Becca was saying. As a viewer, I was trying to think of it as not being there before. I was thinking, well, she didn't have a boyfriend. Why didn't she just say no, I didn't have a boyfriend. Let's move on, you know what I mean? Just the abrupt exit and not really explaining and like just as you upset with Kelsey and Tammy and not just being like, no, I didn't have a boyfriend. People are lying if they say they weren't dating someone or talking to someone like beforehand. Generally speaking, people are gonna have someone they're interested in before they come on the show. It's not like it's completely unheard of. But I think it was just like, why didn't you just say nope, didn't have a boyfriend. I think that I did, and that I don't know if that honestly, like, because I haven't watched, I've just heard what happens that's not shown. So and I talk about it in my interviews. I'm very transparent. Obviously it's not what the viewers viewers are going to see, So I appreciate you guys like kind of like making me aware of that, because yeah, that helps me in this um So, like I said, when I'm when I feel like I'm overstimulated in my like I feel anxious and I feel like there's conflict my natural work like trauma response, it's just a completely shut down. And if I didn't say, like specifically I don't have a boyfriend, I wish that I did. Well. So, yeah, because I want to get into that because one, I mean, we did see you leave just very abruptly, you know, you left before the first row ceremony. You saw yourself out? Was that so because to me as a viewer, it seems like it maybe wasn't necessarily because of this boyfriend allegation. It was more so the fact that Tammy and Kelsey, two of your you know, I would say friends or acquaintances, whatever, kind of went behind your back and didn't. Maybe it's because they didn't address it with you first. They went to James directly. Was that kind of what triggered you, Like the reason of why you felt like this fight or flight response were Okay, I just have to see myself out. It wasn't Was it less about the whole boyfriend boyfriend quote unquote, and more about how they handled an approached Jeames in that entire situation. The night before I all this happened, I pulled my producer inside. Now I was like, I don't think. I don't think that I should be here. I'm having a lot of second thoughts, like and and he encouraged me just to stay and to see. He was like, listen, you're already here. Let's give it a shot. Let's give it one more day. And then all of this happens the next day, like I'm already like I've got to tell James that I'm not interested in him, and I really don't think that my heart is here and I'm ready to give it to someone else. Like I got here, I was optimistic and really like open arms, open heart, like God, whatever you want for me and this season, like I'm here and I'm ready to accept it, whether it's love, like trying to learn a lesson friendships, and unfortunately, like it was one of those things. Once I got there and I tried, it was like, holy crap, like I'm not ready for this. I was encouraged today, stayed and and ultimately like I think that I didn't I that environment. It's not was not healthy for me specifically, Like I back here at home, like I have a support system and people that I know that I can trust and that love me, and that are willing to come to me and check me if I'm wrong or like and give me the constructive criticism. And that's that's not what I got when I was there, Like I'm like, Okay, you guys have an issue, and all this has been talked about and assumed behind my back and not come to me directly. Like I was really like I'm gonna get emotional, you know, and going and saying yes to paradise For me, it wasn't just like I'm going into this with an expectation to find love. It was I am, I know that there's a possibility that I could so much more could come out of this and enlisting all those things like friendships, like more self awareness, like being able to have this platform to talk about things like that that mattered to me, you know, because of Like earlier you asked if there was anyone I wish had gone on the beach. I really wish Leia had gone for some of our listeners who maybe didn't watch all Peter's season and know exactly what you're talking about in terms of alia. Do you want to just give a quick background and then segue into what you're about to say. Yeah, sure. On Peter's season, I and this is pre therapy, you know. I when I've always felt like before, I felt like if I had an issue with someone or if they'd hurt me, or I never knew how to address it. Like growing up, it was always like, you don't say anything, and that was kind of like the way that I survived as I just kept my mouth shut and just and like did what I needed to do, and so I think that that carried through and on Peter season, it was like I want to love like Jesus does and I want to be kind, but in that when you have an issue with someone or having an issue with someone, I didn't know how to communicate it and I failed a Leiah miserably and was really hopefu excited to see her on the beach to be able to apologize to her, like I mean, I've reached out obviously and apologized like by phone, but I was really hopeful to to take responsibility for the way that I acted publicly, because I should have been direct with her. Looking back, I should have, like, having the tools now, I would have done things very differently, approached, approached her and addressed my concerns and given her a fair opportunity to make things right or learn a lesson or you know. And I'm like, looking back, I'm like, maybe I just had this expectation of what I thought that she should be and I was like projecting, you know, so I just felt like I owed her an apology. You came onto the beach, you know with maybe not maybe I will say, not to potentially find love and find a lasting partner, but to make amends with some of the females in your life. And because I mean, and you've said this multiple times, you know, especially when you were confronting Tammy and Kelsey, that you're trying to use these new therapy therapy techniques that you've learned for a better conflict resolution. So going into that, you know, kind of knowing the history with you and Aleia or whoever on Peter's season, do you feel like you were able to take those resolution skills into paradise in this conversation with both Tammy and Kelsey, and do feel good about, you know, seeing your side of things with them and leaving in the way that you did, Like do do you feel good about that? Good? And how everything ended for you? Absolutely going through Peter's season and then after, like I my mental health, like I was at an all time low, like kind of being thrown into the space where people are questioning your character and coming at you and like online people aren't kind and I'm from a small town where I've never really like had to deal with a lot of that and so and then just I really struggled on the show and off the show, Like there was a point where I push show was like I really had to lean on the people in my life to help me get through it. And I had to see someone in regards to my mental health because I did not want to live anymore. And obviously, like all that was really hard to go through and I had regrets and I was like, but I like giving myself grace and looking back, I'm like the way that I handled things on Peter's season, Like I I'm like, I've since scotten therapy and I have this toolbox and I have the ability to work through things that I have no idea how to work through before, and I'm grateful and I do feel like in the situation with Timmy and Kelsey, like I was really able to take those things that I've learned through therapy and to apply those you know, like to be able to say, hey, like I'm setting a healthy boundary and I don't have to like I'm not going to allow someone to talk to me like this, like and then something else is I and I hope this has shown is I tell them multiple times, I'm like, I'm happy to talk to you both separate about your concerns, but right now, like I feel overstimulated like talking to both of you, and I'm but I'm happy to talk to you both separately and address your concerns and work through this together, like I hear you, I want to hear you. I want to work through this. And I think Tammy again calls me manipulative and set and neither of them talk to me separately, And at that point, I'm like, I just I already was feeling like maybe I maybe I wasn't ready, and I think at that point, I was like, I my life is so great back at home, and I'm really I knew that that wasn't the place for me to be anymore. And I'm like, okay, if I I am proud of the way that I handled things because before therapy, I, like I said, I completely shut down, but people that saw Peter season saw it like I just cried and didn't address anything, and I was able to communicate and handle conflict with grace. I feel like and not perfectly, you know, but I think and knowing what I was and how I reacted in conflict before to being where I am now, like in standing up for myself and saying like I can set the soundary, like I'm allowed to walk away, I don't have to allow someone to talk to me like this, I'm able to share what I want to share, like it's not my personal life, is not your business. It felt good. It sounds like overall, you know, in the past couple of years, you have put in a lot of work to learn, you know, you know we all have strength, strengths and weaknesses and to know you know where you could learn and grow and do better. And it sounds like you applied that in Paradise and I hope that that continues. I mean, we've all like every time you put yourself in this situation, you learn something new, you have major takeaways that I think like you can't expect and tell you go through it, and so I applaud you for putting in the work and you know, focusing on yourself and really setting those boundaries, and I hope that continues. I think this is also a good point because you know, you've talked a little bit about mental health and setting healthy boundaries and conflict resolution, and I know a lot of our listeners would love any sort of advice that you could give to them. So if there's one bit of solid advice that you could give to just anyone going through something similar or going through, you know, this moment of growth in their life or wanting to kind of better themselves and to set those healthy boundaries or potentially go on paradis in the future, what would that bit of advice be for them? Therapy in Jesus. Aside from that, it's okay to say no, it's a hey to walk away when you feel uncomfortable. It's okay not to share things that you don't feel like comfortable sharing. And on TV, especially like it's it's even harder because it's it's not just the people in front of you. It's the people that are watching, Like you're not just sharing with Like I wasn't just sharing with Tammy and Kelsey. I'm sharing with I'm being having to share with the rest of the world things that I'm not ready to talk about. If you're not ready to talk about something, don't feel like you're not forced to do that. If it's uncomfortable, You're not forced to do that. And you don't have to explain yourself either. It's some people don't are already convinced of their series of events, and regardless of how you try to explain it or rationalize or tell your side, like, there's no convincing them otherwise. And I and like even now, I'm like, you know what, like the people that are in my life know the truth. I know the truth, and I don't need to convince anyone otherwise. You know, Um, I can't, like I always say, like they're I don't have regrets. There are lessons that you learned through those. I feel like I before I prayed, um, before I went really like okay, God, like help me leave me in the right direction, like where like where do you want me to be? And I questioned whether or not my heart was ready to give to somebody else. But I felt led and called to walk into this as open as I could. And I really think I tried to convince myself I was ready to meet someone, but ultimately, like and in the same way I said for Peter Season walking away, I walked away with so much more than just you know, finding love. Obviously I didn't find love on Paradise, but maybe I know that I was called there for a reason, and whatever that reason is, I meant to touch someone's life. And even though the whole experience was hard for me sometimes and most of the time, it's not about me. It's about what God's plan and purposes. And I said yes to what he called me to do, and it wasn't what I looked what I thought it would look like. But you know, I don't think it ever really is. I don't understand now why things happen the way they did, but maybe one day I will. Yeah. I think everything can be taken as a learning experience and to grow from it and have some sort of takeaway which sounds like you are doing or you have done since then. So one thing that we can clear the air on because you know, I'm sure viewers probably have questions, and that's why I want to give you the reins and explain this a little bit more. Is when you were leaving in your exit interview and you're going home, you made a comment something about like, you know, why would I search for what you know? Like I don't have to be here to search for what I have at home. And I think for viewers they maybe took that as you have a man back home, but there could potentially be more. You know, you keep talking about your great support system back home with family and friends, and so can you just explain that comment a little bit more so no one has any more assumptions about that peace, Like there's no peace on that beach. There's there's none. So if I was in the moment, if I was referring to anything, honestly, the only thing I could think about was what a mess it was and the people that I love back home. But I feel like I would have never been in that position that I was in and paradise with like my my friends, my family, my therapist to support me, like my my sister. Like, yeah, if I was referring to anything, that's what it was and my dog. M Hey, that's all you had to say. I get it. Yeah, I met the dog. All right, There you go, people, you heard it from Victoria here. Hopefully we put some of those rumors and the allegations to bed from what we saw go down Monday night. So Victoria, thank you for joining us on Bachelor Happy Hour, and we're excited to see more of you of potentially what's to come in the future. Who knows. It was such a pleasure to have you on. Thank you for joining us this opportunity, and just for being such an amazing women. And I admire both of you so much, so I'm really grateful for a back atcha. I'm hoping that we were able to clear the air for a lot of the viewers and a lot of our listeners regarding the whole boyfriend allegation. I feel like she needed this moment to chat with us to kind of say her side of things, give her peace, and hopefully she has learned or had some major takeaways and can just you know, continue to work on herself. I feel like I'm really glad that she was able to come on here and speak about just how therapy has helped her and setting healthy boundaries and you know how to work through some conflicts because we could always be better in those situations in those regards. So I feel like at the end of the day, she was already having second thoughts about being there, already wanted to leave and just didn't feel like it was right. And then once she had that confrontation, she was overwhelmed and was like, I got a bounce. Yeah, yeah, it's a lot. It's and as she said, it's not just having a conversation with whoever is sitting directly in front of you, but you open yourself up to millions of viewers, which isn't It's so intense, and I don't think until anyone actually goes through it you understand the weight that that holds. One thing she said at the beginning, too, is that people have so many assumptions about the couple hours that they see on TV. And we are well aware because we have gone through several seasons now, and you know, have been in Paradise a couple of times, and have been on The Bachelor and I was the lead. Like, there's so much that people don't see and the way that things can be pieced together seems extreme. It seems so dramatic. It seems like somebody is either good or bad, or people hate or love each other, and it's like that's not the case. There's so much more that people will never be able to see, and so that people can see every detail of everything and still decide that they don't like you exactly exactly, it's it just is what it is. So again, you know, I've said this a million gazillion times, but at the end of the day, this is a reality TV show, but we are humans, we are people living lives, and it is a TV and I know it. At the same time, I know all the times you think that people don't get along and that they don't like each other, and that's not the case. Most people coming off of every season that I've seen really do get along and like each other. So I'm going to leave it at that. Thank you Tia for joining me today. You know I love you. It's going to be such a fun season to do this with you. Thank you to Victoria for joining us. I know that that probably wasn't the easiest conversation, but I'm glad that we were able to have it. And the biggest thank you to all of our badche Oor Happy Hour listeners, because without you all, we couldn't be here doing what we do each week. So thank you for hanging out with us. Please make sure to follow us on social. You can find us at Batchelor Happy Hour on Instagram and at Batch Nation Pods on both Facebook and Twitter. And it's always don't forget to subscribe to us on our podcast. You can do that on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, the Wandering App, or wherever you are listening to our lovely voices right now. Thanks everyone, Bye MHM