Labyrinth with Jenny Zigrino

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Speaker 1: On the be Dol Cast, the questions asked if movies have women and them, are all their discussions just boyfriends and husbands, or do they have individualism the patriarchy and best start changing it with the beck Dol Cast. Hello and welcome to the Bechdel Cast. I'm your host Caitlin Dronte and the other one Jamie Laftus, and we are talking about movies and how women are portrayed in them. That's what the Bechtel Cast is about. I want to take back calling myself. The other one that was, yeah, I'm gonna be less down on myself, but I immediately jumped to, yeah, don't minimize yourself and your role. Okay, what were you talking about. Let's try again. Okay, but we're keeping this all in. But we're all this is a character. I'm supposed to be making a concentrated effort. I had, like a I paid a hunt someone first last week. What you can say, you do the intro, you say like, hey, welcome, okay, okay, ready, yes one, Hey welcome. This is the Bechtel Cast. I'm your first and primary and most important host, Jamie Laptus, and I'm your ship piece of crap host Caitlyn, ok don't be so hard. We should learn from me. I'm so confident, and let's try it again. Okay. I think people get it. We are both equally important and this is like a cheese your own adventure podcast, Like who do you want to be? The Elpha of this one? Um, Welcome to the Bechtel Castes is what we were trying to say. That's what leave this all in. This is perfect. Some stuff we're working some stuff out. Yeah, it's a hard time of year. It's the winter. It's sad. We're in the throes of it. Baby, we are. I got to I saw snow yesterday because you were in Boston or New York or somewhere on the northeast. Was in Boston and I got to brush off my dad's car and everything. Wow. Yeah, I've been living in a tropical paradise that is Los Angeles. It's a beautiful city. Um. Well, let's uh introduce our guest. Why don't we Okay, Oh wait, we didn't say what the podcast is about. That. Oh they get it. Okay, Yeah, I guess let's stop saying it's the best. It's Yeah, I'm on board with the Yeah, listen to another episode. I'm tired of talking about this podcast. Yeah, let's quit, let's cancel. No, let's introduce our guest. She's a very funny comedian. You might have seen her on Conan. Uh. She's also in movies like Bad Santa to One movies. Hello and welcome. Jenny's a green lady. Thank you so much for being here. You're both equally as important, but not as important as the guests. Exactly, exactly, Okay, So there the alpha was sitting next to us. All it's the whole. That's why I just like you bitches, and that's it out. Sat back and watch. It's coming from the house. These girls think they matter? What right a producer? Okay, never mind, you guys do matter. Okay, we'll get to it. I want to talk about Aristotle, but I don't think he wants us to talk about what is how he has to poop? I told you we'd call it a Yeah, he does, and he but he made a real show of not doing it before we started, So now it's honest to make a real show of when he chooses exactly your punishment if you if you hold it for the whole episode, that would suck. It's like for him, it's like yeah, but for all of us too, I'd like to make this about myself as well. Sure, let's make it about the poop, you guys, that's that's we're having focus issues in this thing. Well, let's try to reel it back in and talk about the movie that we're going to be talking about, which is The Labyrinth. Uh. It was came out in What six, directed by Jim Henson, written by Terry Jones. It's got every anything, not everything. Tell us tell the what does this movie mean to you? Why did you choose this one? I chose this one because I feel like for a lot of us, it was the first time we really saw a female protagonist in a movie that wasn't all about getting the dude, that wasn't a baby. She's still trying to get the dude, but it's a baby dude. She's a dude, and it's a little dude's Yeah. And and then also for many of us, we were introduced to David Bowie through this movie, and it was the first time we felt our loins do anything. So I think it recognized that they were there and forever we were into Dandy's and lady boys. So that's what I'm into now, and that's the only thing I'll ever be into. When did you see this movie for the first time? I think I saw when I was a kid. And then remember when hot topic I don't hold to fit? Oh yeah, two thousand and one. Then it was just like all day, every day, and then it stopped. And then I went to an arts high school and it had a real big resurgence in the arts high school every Halloween. Every Halloween, someone was Bowie. I just googled where what the baby from Labyrinth looks like now? And I wish I hadn't what. Okay, First of all, the Huffington's Post headline is very mean. It says, thirty years later, the baby from Labyrinth is a real life goblin king. I don't know, maybe it's something he just texts. But he's I mean, he's wearing a fedora. He's not like it's a bummer that used such a cute little baby. Okay, let's see here it is, but there's a there's an American Express ad really getting in the way of me, uh finishing up this? Okay, so here he is a real life goblin king. I don't think it's that bad. He's just wearing a lot of layer. He just he looks like a steampunk kid. That's it. He is a steampunk it. I think he makes something. He makes like steampunky things or something looks he looks fun. He's oh now he's a peer and a fabricator. Do you think he's got His whole identity is based around the fact that he was in The Labyrinth as a baby, and he's like, I gotta live up to this. Wonder his real name is Toby for real? Yeah, I just said Dobby, like Dobby the Alpha was like, Toby is a different in the man's name. I wonder if he inspired it. You know that David Bowie did the sound of the baby laughing because he didn't didn't like the baby's laugh made it sounds like I can do that. I can do better, I can do better. I love that he did. He does that like that trick with the crystal ball, which has no business really, I mean, is it a bubble luring? It is, but like they worked this like very flimsy reason for it to be in the movie and all there, He's like, do you want a gift? He doesn't have anything to do with anything. But look how I can do this cool trick. And I'm just like you. You just wanted to show off. David Bells like almost everything he does this, it's just a big fun show off down to his like leggings. He wants you to know. He wants you to know. Yeah, and we want to know. We do want to know. Um, just a quick recap of the story. How I want to David and how the baby's ugly man? Now he's he's actually, he's he's a regular looking dude. He just I'm just I'm trying to get us to pass the Bectel test in real life. Because all we've done so far, let's talk about other men. One last thing. His face looks really a smooth baby to acknowledge that this is what we're talking about, and to look at the picture. It's mostly just because I'm too lazy to get up and walk around the table and see what it looks like. I'm just saying that freaks me out, like a really smooth face, like a smooth man. And oh yeah, you didn't know if you were talking about like the baby's smoothness or he's like, oh no, I like a smooth baby. I like a harry a swab. I like a swab baby, like a scar baby, scar baby. Okay, now baby, all right, let's okay, no more fu. No, we're going to welcome back to it. Oh yeah, we just have to like spend a minute talking about something else and then we'll go back to how we want to fuck David Bowie. Um. The story is, uh, this little this girl, she's down a teenager. She is all about fans. She's like, I love fantasy. It looks by the theater book. She loses me first scene for that reason, Like, this is fucking nerves. What's this done? Soliloquy? You're doing yourself in the park just kind of interrupted quick. Okay. I was when I was younger, I went to fat Camp and we had this girl there who God bless her, Like I wish I knew her now because she seems like she would be so cool. She was obsessed with the with the play Cats, so she would just put on cat face, like yeah, she's just fun. She would just do cat face and sing and do performances from the musical Cats by herself. That's it. I just just memory. Yeah, But like because we're fat camp we're all fat, and we were playing baseball when day and we got really sweaty and it was like summer in Massachusetts, and her makeup melted. Oh I love a good cat girl there. It's just like a fucking nightmare. Then she she left her because there's some mean to her. But it's so funny to think, Well, I, whoever you are out there, young girl who contact me? I miss you and I thought about you everybody since I was twelve. Anyway, let's just never talk about the movie. Let's get she's a hot theater kid, all right. Yeah, she's a baby theater kid with really expensive costomer like that cost and would cost like a thousand dollars at a unfair geeze. She was dedicated, damn, or just a brat. Probably more of a brat um. The story is about a girl. She's a young budding woman and she likes you, Caitlin. I want to fund her. That's what I'm talking about. That passes the test. I don't want to suck that. Jennifer Connelly. But like Jennifer Connelly in Requiem for a Dream, Oh yeah, oh I straight like the TV is for sure. I watched we talked abou just like one word and then it's over. In the first episode, we talked about kill Bill, and I had only seen the DBS kill Bill, which is like a great kill bill. Yeah my name, and I like two Party, that's great. Nice. Oh yeah, the movie lab Yeah do you want me to? Yeah? Do you want to? Just gets right there, alright, a young budding theater nerd right, just wants to do theaters and plays and ship. But she got this dumb little brother who's a baby, and he's a brat and she's like, oh, I don't want to take care of this dumb sucking baby. And then she's like, goblin king take this baby away. And then she runs away that goes to the bathroom or something, and then she comes back and the baby's gone. She's like, oh no, where's this baby? And then David Bowie shows up. We all get owners and then and then he's like, oh, you can come get your bro, but he's I have him now, and so then she'll get yeah, go to the city goblins. Then she finds this tiny goblin that she's befriends who's like all grumpy and ship, and then she makes it through. There's like some weird dancings and a ball and she's like, oh, no, I'm questioning everything. Do I love him? Don't I love him? And then eventually I mean, should we give the end away? Yeah? There are spoilers here. Yeah. Oh, she makes a lot of goblin friends on the way to serdidymus, which I think is just a nickname for epididymus, which we all know as the male reproductive organ tube thing. I don't know what's an epididamus. Let me look it up. I just looked up. Oh that's not an epidemas, Yeah, isn't it. I don't know. I went to public school. Epidermis is your skin? But what am I thinking about? Yeah? Where ventricles? Seminal ventricles seven venecles? No, I'm fucking right. Epididamus highly convoluted duct behind the testes along which sperm passes to the fast My dick, I'm so sorry that I ever judged you for is the squirtle bags. It's the first name. But well, you were googling anatomy. I googled did David Bowie and Jennifer Connelly hook up? I hope not. She was like fifteen when they filmed this, but like David Bowie did that not to get into his legacy, but he was like down, yeah, but they didn't bummer good because that would have been statutory rape. Again, she was fifteen when they filmed that movie. Uh, that's the story of the Labyrinth. Uh. Let's talk about um our characters. Uh. We have one female protagonist, Jennifer Sarah, who is the whiniest, angstyest, most annoying little bee word that I've ever encountered. Were never like that when you were a pater nerd and a teenager didn't have those outfits. I might be having selective memory, but I really remember myself as being a really cool kid. Okay, sure of course you're walking around like, hey, guys, you know what epidennymus means. Yeah, I was teaching all the kids. Yeah. I So she's pretty much the only notable primary female character. Was also the Worm's wife who never screen and the hag Puppet. The hag puppet, but she's very tertiary. Also, although the um are any of the oh what's their names, the ones that take their heads off, they all I all perceived them as men male genitals. They don't, but they had like I suppose the voices of men their genderless. Yeah, they a lot of them are a bit genderless. Yeah. Yeah, a lot of those goblins are genderless too. Well, no, some of them have like dresses and shot um. Either way, I'm going to continue to argue that the only notable funeral character. What about that this stepmo. I loved this step mom, Like she had a story like there, she didn't do anything wroungd. She have one line and she's like, why does she treat me like I'm a stepmother in a fairy tale? All because you know, Sarah gets home and then she's like her stepmos like we were worried at seven pm, and then she begins to scream and run away and pour Steven I wrote down, Um, poor stepmom liked her hair. She should have good hair. She did, she did great stepmother. Well that scene I think that allows the movie to technically pass the Bechtel test. Yeah. Yeah, because they talk about yeah, like I was worried about you where if you been You're supposed to be home to babysit or whatever. It's a short conversation, and that the step mom has three minutes of screen time maybe less, Like it's not she's still getting paid and residual. She was, she was and she had like anyways, I was like, she's very beautiful. I really like her. But she doesn't come back. No, she doesn't. Yeah, and she's on screen for yeah two minutes. Okay, so pass the test, guys, test done, good night. But so by comparison, we have a bunch more more. Uh, how do you talk again? I'm just gonna keep stuttering broken, I'm a robot. There's a bunch of dude characters, is what I'm trying to say. Characters. We've got Jaref, the Goblin King. Is that it's Jareff. Jareff is his name. David Bowie's character is named Jareed. I wonder how many Jarrett's were born from this movie, although they'd be like our age and I don't know any Jarred's so that you know, well, I mean just put facebook anyway, there's a little Jareff. Now, um, we've got Hoggle, which I have some things to talk about concerning him in a moment. Yeah, well, Hoggle is a piece of ship. He's a piece of ship. Yeah, but we grow to love Hoggle. Actually I find him repulsive and horror I just hate everything about him. We have Ludo, who's like the big monster guy, and then Sir Epididymis is I don't know, a little fox creature. I don't know, I think so. But then he's writing a dog. Now he's I think he's a Yorkshire terror. He looks like a oh is that the is that dog British? The one that looks really nice and like he came from Renaissance fair. I'm sorry I was. Yeah, that's because I found a ton of Jarreed's and that's why I wasn't really listening. Look at this one. This one is like he's really leaning into Jareff. Jareed. What's his name, Jared? Where is he from? If you're listening, I don't know, but he's an event coordinator in Infinity marketing deal. We're probably giving away too much of British stranger's phone saying I guess I don't know anyway. Okay, Well that they're out there, Yeah, those horny moms had a lot of Jarreff's. Yeah, they're like, I don't know why, I just like this name. It just you know, what sounds so powerful. It's just, you know, I just want to have an alluring son. You can really take a sweep a teenage girl off her feet. Yeah, let's talk about that. Uh. There is the scene or the sequence where Jared' is like, hey, Hoggle, give the girl this peach rufie and make her eat it so that she can have a dance scene with me, a very sensual ball dance thing that's like a dream. Weird. He rufies her. He does rufe her. But that scene is like that was supposed to be like her dream scene of like if you stay, like all your dreams are going to come true. So you So she's in love with him. She supposed to be like seventeen in this kid, I told myself, but I'm not sold. Look i'm gonna say she's seventeen. I'm gonna say she's legal. For so the movies. She might have played an older character than her actual Jennifer was actually aged because she was fifteen when this movie came out, and I didn't perceive her as being like like she was just had gone through puberty to me, like she she seemed older to me. She seemed seventeen to me. Really she seemed like fourteen to me. No fourteen year old has brows like that. Did you see her brows? They're great. Well, Jennifer Conny is an outlier with her eyebrows, so she really came into That's what people always say about her. She born eyebrows first. She she had that thing where they're like brushed up a little, but it doesn't look insane, which is like, I could never do that. I overtweets when I was a teenager. Anyways, those skinny ones like pregnant, those are like absolutely teen mom eyebrows that over plucking. Anyways, I just I just think that that it wasn't some a rufie Peach. It was just like he wanted to stop her from getting this baby because he wants that to keep that baby. But he's also like, if you live in this Peach world, all your dreams will come true. Come on, It's very complix. Maybe that is because that's what your impression of that scene was when you first watched it as a kid. So I saw this movie for the first time when I was probably in college, and then I watched it again three times over the past few weeks to prepare for this episode, and I was like, oh my god, he uh he rufies her with this peach and then so that he can have this weird dance, this ballroom dance thing with her and get all close to her and he's a predator and it's weird, and I just found it very creepy, especially because again she's fifteen. David Bowie at the time was thirty nine. It was three over age, Okay, so I would not have thought it was charming if they hooked up, Yeah, it would have been, But fifteen year old Jenny still would have sucked. There's like that's okay. That's the thing. It's like, we are like it is wrong, but like remember when you were fifteen, you totally wanted to suck, like thirty year old men, that's all you wanted to do. That's why that scene was like because I was watching this movie for the first time, like every I don't know why. I haven't seen a lot of movies. How many movies have I seen that we've done on this. I just the beauty and the beauty and the beast and that was about it. But I was okay with it just because it's like I feel like when I was that age, I had that exact like fantasy about someone from the cast of Harry Potter, you know, like everyone has that. Wait, but they would have been your age unless it was Snape. I also would have sucked Snape. Can we just put that out there? Oh yeah, Moody the all died this year. Yeah, Prince too. Would you have got heartbeat? Yeah, he's worried that all your icons. I would have sucked Leonard Cohen, which is somewhere, which is a harder choice. That is hard. Oh, well this year, I love a deep voice. I do. Uh. But but like Suzanne Arrow, Leonard Cohen living on like living in Greece for no reason. Yeah, I think I would have definitely hooked up with Anton Yelkin, who also passed. Is that he's about little guy from Green Room and he's in Star Trek and he sounds hot. He's age appropriate, is what he is? Oh he's the jeep. Uh. Yeah, he had a very tragic death. Uh, and I'm sad to bring it up. Let's talk about that. We lost a whole spank bank about it. The fact that we keep going off on tangents is very fitting because we're just getting in the lost in the labyrinth that is this, So it's very somatic. Actually, Okay, so again, he rufies are at the peach. You don't like it. I think it's more of a spell, so it doesn't count as much. He's, Okay, it's a spell. Everyone's motivation. You can have it. I'm not going to agree with you, but that can be your weird, creepy take if you wanted to. Can we can we backtrack a little bit to the scene where she yells at the baby, literally insane to me, like she I've never and I was like, we were all at bitchy teenage girl. Never would I pick up an adorable baby and try to send it to hell because I couldn't like wear my Renaissance Fair costumes outside, Like, that's just crazy. I wouldn't I would do that. Now it's a shirty year old woman. I'd be like, I hate chipping out of my life. Why did I have you? I can't wear my red something? Was she in a play? Or is that she just has no friends? That's why she has to make friends with. She's desperate to be like, Hoggle, you're my friend, right, It's just like, no, I don't really want to be your friend. She's like, no, she didn't really technically make any friends. In this movie. But at the end they love her. At the end, they do love and then they all come back. Yeah, in her room. She turns around and she's like, my friends, but he just turned around and all your friends already in your room and they were all goblins even creepier like that, look at my mirror, and I'm just like, I wish my friends were here. And I turned around and they're all there. Wow, I really would like there to be like that scene. And then we see it from like the parents and there's no one. They just like, she's lost her mind. Yeah, bard in school, she but she screams at this baby a lot. And then there's like cutaway scenes where the goblins are like, send the baby to hell, and then she does at the last second, and she's like, I wish the Goblin king would take you. And then I don't, like, I don't know why she blames this baby for all of her problems. That was confusing to me. And then and then David Bowie's motivation why does he want to keep the baby? Is there a reason he wants to add to his goblin collection? Because the baby turns into a goblin as I guess, I mean that's never explicitly stated, but that he's luring He's yeah, he's luring young women into his labyrinth. He doesn't that's the only way. He just sits around the girl to curse her baby, and he's like, pussy, Oh it also okay. So then she yells at the baby, baby disappears, and then David Bowie appears and she's not scared. I was like, do they know each other? Well, yeah, there's the whole thing about the movie. He's the villain, but like, they have several scenes together. One of them he's dancing with her after he roofied her spell. It cast a Rufi spell on her, it's not ripe if it's a spell. Is that part of the betel? Yeah? Yea. So there's that creepy thing. There's uh, the other creepy thing where I'm pretty sure Hoggle also wants to have sex with Sarah. Well, look at him, he does. I think Hoggle has a genuine love for her. I viewed it as more so, Yeah, I see, maybe I'm just at but I feel so bad by giving me the peach a paternal horny. But I don't think that necessarily implies that it's like a parental or like a fatherly he's the goblin. It's not a real thing, it's really he's a he's a tiny person in a suit. That's it. There's like a lot of I had one smart thought this whole movie. Let's hear it. Okay, here it goes. There's a lot of references to other ship in this movie where it's like, there are a few things there is the fact that she was like a pubescent fucking mess who her parents were trying to fix her. And that kind of reminds me of like when do you getting booted out of the nursery in Peter Pan. That's what that whole like flashback scene felt like to me, when she was like my toys suck or whatever. And then the whole like it was a kind of Wizard of Ozzie too, because she's just like walking through, you know, walking down this very long hallway and making friends and then at the end, just like in the Wizard of oz there's a room full of goblins and a baby and David Bowie, Yeah, exactly, Like that's my smart thought. What if it's like it's a would be like an allegory for for growing up women, growing up of a coming of age, take a better period this what is the thing that I was just like, are they talking about a pussy in a mean way? When they kept calling it like whatever the stink swamp? I was like, is he just stuff like fart swamp? But then there was a huge cavernous like pussy opening in the middle of the fart swamp that there was a hole. WHOA, Okay, I think it was a butt hole. That's as long as there was some sort of reference to a human hole. I feel like I have retained my sanity. I think. I think the guys who took their heads off of my favorite part of that movie. They have a great song. It's like what the chili? The chili song or which not losing your head? Yeah? Yeah, yeah. They they're dancing around in front of what's very clearly a green screen. Yeah, it's great, and you can kind of see the outlines of the people that's been talking. But it's like nowadays all that would have been CG. And puppets are so great. Puppets are awesome. Yes, yeah, I like puppets. Yeah. Then they make it feel real and wonderful, like you totally get lost. If that's a CG thing. I'm like, it's CG. But if it's like a puppet, I'm like, oh, that's like I feel like that's a real creature. Though, Can we talk about has anyone seen Mohanna? No? No, I'm your f B post batic? What is it? It's so good? Everyone won't see it? Should see man will Mariana and I love him, but he ruined our opening weekend for bad Sanna, So fuck that guy. Probably let But movie Moanna is so good and I loved it so much, and I think everyone should see it a thousand times and buy it on DVD, even though that's a medium that doesn't is gonna haveb sleet. I still buy DVDs. You still by DVDs. I wonder what the vinyl version of DVD is gonna be? You mean, like what? Uh like? I collect vinyl and then whenever we all just like press a button in our head and we like play a movie on our eyeball screens. That's so DVDs are going to be like the vinyl they call it, they call they call the swamp the land of stench, and they keep threatening to send people to the Land of stench. Maybe I was just being self conscious. But I was like, they're talking about your someone's place. But did they act? I actually had that same I forget did they actually fall into it or they just went down the still they stopped them, so yeah, and then there's a bridge over at the collapses. But then they also with the stones and they make part noises. I mean, it's just great's just five minute fart jokes. Is it a fart? Don't know? I mean, I think you can tell the difference queffart. It's true. Queezers are delicate. I think they're called quee fi laural. It's like, no, it's like if you see a herd of moose. It's just the plural is the same. It's just quef. I had so many que time or no, it was it's like I saw a bunch of quef in the woods. I had another thought, which is that, oh, because there's only um one primary female character there doesn't really allow the there's no like relationships that she can have with other female characters. And uh. Also concerning is that the she doesn't go through any sort of like emotional arc even though she is she does see that line you don't control me or whatever that line. Yeah, No, I think she. I think she definitely goes from Bradty Brett Bratt to like, I'm a woman and you can't control me, and I'm going to get that baby back because I love that baby and I'm responsible for that baby. And also it's my fault that I sent that baby to hell. Yeah, she does accept expose the responsibility of the How I'm no, i'mot this thing the iPhone store. I think it's very warm in here, and I think I'm just getting over you did I'm also going through because I'm so old. No, um, I suppose I guess I just didn't notice her arc as much as I noticed like a Hoggle, who's all like, I'm alone some man, and I don't want any friends, but okay, I guess it's okay to have one. And also I'm a coward, but I should be every person I've ever been in a relationship. How you're about to talk about this character? Are you getting turned on now? You're like, oh my god, maybe Hoggles, I was going to talk about how I used like puppets, like I have a not that puppets like get me horny, but I do think I like I used to guys, I used to use your words carefully. I used to theater and so, oh did you oh at the brend or No, it was in Brookline. It was in Brookline. The kids wonder, yeah, oh, could you can see from the train station. I always wanted to go in there. It was fun. I worked there for like a year, and but there was a puppeteer there. He was the artist in residence and he lived in the attic of the puppet. I was like nineteen, and I wanted to him real bad. I had the biggest crush on the attic puppeteer and he talked to you through the puppet. He he didn't talk to women really at all. He was afraid of that. Yeah, I want to show you the puppets. He I took his class, his puppet class, and it was these very It's like imagine the scene from Ghost with the pottery, but like with me. God was one time I was forming the head of my puppet and he touched my hand and oh, my god, okay, and he was like, what's its name. It's just like I don't know, and he was like, I think it's going to have a beautiful voice, and I'll never oh, my god, I'm the sweating. I think then if you were to ever the hottest thing that's ever happened to me in my entire life, he was also Yeah, he was like twice age if you ever hooked up with him. I imagine the four play for him to be like have an erect penis, but like have a puppet on over it. He was just like another smaller didn't um, this is what I just imagined, and I'm it's forever to haunt met is. He has a piercing and here's a string attached to it in a little marionette. God, and you know how make it dance? Well? You know how like a penis can like flex a little bit so it could do a little Yeah, I could do a little dance. Maybe I'm actually virgin I have Did you let me explain to you how much as can play Aristotle comment Aristotle's having a meltdown? How's your Did you ever have those in synct marionets? No? No, I don't know what those are. I had five well off, there were five members shows, five marionettes. You had to get the full set. That's when Bye Bye Bye came out, and there was the set of marionettes that came out and they were horrifying, But I've played with them a lot. Were they like paper like three? Like in general, I enjoy puppets. That's rule. All right, Well you guys have puppet finishes. Were here and I ghosting it, Jim Hanson over here. Okay, the puppet guy came to a stand up show I did many years, Like I thought you were just going in the sense that the publica came when I probably Oh no, no, I wouldn't want to wreck a puppet, you know. But like, but he came to a show like years later, and I, like, you know, zoned in on him. I was in love with him, and he like absolutely didn't remember who I was. Oh no, I know you're like when you walked her like it did have a beautifulness. What did you think of that voice? I want you to fund this guy so badly. No, I know, I bet he still lives in that attic, still in that Yeah, I'll find him. Let me see if there was any other if there were any other things I wanted to say. The the we have the it passes the back to test again, the movie does whenever she encounters that like little old hag puppet, which is the only other like obviously female puppet um because they talk about uh, she's like, oh, don't you want to go and play with your toys? And it's a weird conversation but it technically passes. Although like she's very she's like tricksy and deceptive, so it's I don't like to see women treating other women that way. Oh my god, girl and girl cry you know, I'm okay, wait, how do we feel about how high in the air David Bowie threw the baby really inside, like you could tell it was a dummy. But it was like, how does that add to the story, how high he threw that baby. It's a good use of physical comedy, It's true, and David Bowie was very funny, master physical, master physic. He wore a dress one time. Men in dresses is always it's a joke because he's not supposed to wear it. According to I get it, Like I'm just like, I don't know if you guys get it, but I just d same birthdays. Really whoa we are? One? Let me guess January and close at all? Same good months January. He speaking of m guessing things and questions you have a game game. Okay, the game is called uh, drumroll please, I can't the laby a rent. I just would like to say Calen has been tweaking this game, tweaking this labyrinth for upboards of three, rubbing it gently, wait with a small one of the big one. The laby a majora, the labor labor labynt. There's a labya manora and a majority even in even in the Goblin King, there was an outer The labyrinth is did you not? Did you see a womanhood? So I had to many wrong turn everyone's boulder, just walls falling at Oh and all those hands, oh the gropy, Oh those the other you want to talk about, like helping hands, which actually the ones that got the ones that got chopped. You know when someone's fingers you when you just chop them. Yeah, Well, the hydrochloric acid in the vagina usually won't just sect, and then there's just bones. Yeah all right. Well, there's two directions that I was going to maybe have this game go. One was that we just tell stories about men who don't understand how to pleasure a woman, because it's such a complicated labyrinth of folds and bits, down there or the second one, which I actually it's a fold in a bit more than is or maybe that's what mine is. Uh. Email is the basic version at the bectel cast dot com if you've ever had sex with me, and let me know if whether or not you can confirm that my vagina is a fold in a bit. Anyway, the game I've been told of a very nice one. Well you are the so I got I got an oh boy? Yeah, reviews are One time a guy told me that my vagina speaks to him and then did you do a really good like? I'm the first version of what's the second version of the first? Second one is just a trivia questions about woman's women's anatomy, so we already learned. Okay, cool because I didn't have anything prepared for the other one. But we all know that that men um are lazy and don't understand vaginas and it will always be a mystery to them totally. You know, they get everything else in the world, they just don't get this. Okay, yea true, it's blind spot. Yeah, we'll also I will say that all women are insanely different and complicated, and what works for one is not gonna work for the other. That's true. Some of we got talking vaginas, we got yeah, yeah, that could really go either way. That yeah, maybe interpreted it anyway. So I have five questions for Jenny to answer, and if you win, you each When you get right, you get to you go further into the LaBier wins, and you're trying to reach the clip castle. You reach the castle and you have, uh an orgasm. I don't know. I don't know what the prize is, all right, Number one, although and you mentioned something to this effectually, I think you might get this answer right. Where does the average vagina fall on the pH scale? I have got multiple choice? Sorry, I forgot to mention that, so too, four point five, seven or ten point five? What's the what's the right? What's so? Water is seven? So neutral is seven? Like one? Uh No, it's basic. The higher the number, the more basic. Okay, Sorry, uh it's a four point five correct. I thought it was the higher the basic, The higher the number, the more basic. You can. Yeah, the vagina is acidic, so it's full of acid, caustic acid that will burn your penis off. I just want to point out that my vagina is a ten on the Richter scale. Look out, guys, earthquake danger that makes the earth move shift those plates. Number two the condition and I'm going to mess up the pronunciation of this. Uh uterus uh dittle fists the delphis. I don't know. You get the idea is characterized by a woman having a a upside down uterus, two uteruses three and uh see not three? Uh see an abnormally large uterus or d a uterus that produces an excess of menstrual blood to uterus. Correct, my friend has that? Really? Yeah? Oh my god, I guess also since I have a tilted one. Really, I have a tilted one. Thanks for sharing. You're welcome, guys, just saying you go down a different path with this here. That's what I like to say about You're ready to get educated. It's like studying for your s A T. S. That's great, sexy, Yeah, that's great. Number three Okay, how far am I in the labyrinth? By the way, you well you've gotten. I mean, we had to help you out a little bit with number one, but I knew what it was. Science. Yeah, there's a math question later on there. But you're your two fifths of the way into the labor rint Congratulations number three, which company produced a film that was the first film to use the word vagina, Disney, Paramount MGM, or Warner Brothers. I'm gonna say Warner Brothers. They seem more edgy. You are not correct. It was Disney, believe it or not, in a nine short educational film called the Story of Menstruation. I've seen that really. Yeah, first of all, that that's a not a film film. Okay, I'm thinking feature films here. Yes, that was a misleading question. It's yeah, there's a Did you guys know the original name for Bambi was Vagina. That's a fun fact. I thought Bambi was a little girl. Dearly went through puberty and got horns, and he was like, oh, I'm a man. If I thought Bamby was a boy too, I was always gonna now Bamby is just a stripper. I was about to say, if I if I became a stripper, which was my dream for about three or four years, I was gonna become Bamby. But yeah, there's still time. Just kidding. Yeah, I think it passed my prime. Now you can do it. I would have called myself if I have to name myself after Disney character. I think I would. My stripord name would be Um Dopey, one of the Welcome to This Day alright. Number four on average, how many eggs will be ovulated from a woman's ovaries before she goes through menopause. Okay, okay, you're right, you're right. I didn't even know the other answers. I know all the answers for the Disney ones, and I'm just gonna give Molanna. Is that the movie? Uh yeah, She's like, oh, come here, Mauie, touch my vagina. None of us have seen a character. Maui is a character. He's like the demi god. No, he's a character. He's a he's a demigod. Guys, it's such a great movie. Go watch um anyway, the and then number five, So you're four fifths away through comment because I'm gonna give you the Disney one because I feel very generous. Yeah, so add the number of vaginas that one kangaroo has and the number of vaginas that one koala bear has. How many vaginas do you have? One of the ants for their multiple choke. I forgot that. I was like, just do the mass. Your choices are two, three four or five four? So close it's five five? I guess what, guys, kangaroos have three vaginas and koala bears have two vaginas. Where do they get the extras? They well, karngas? What I combine the two animals into one word, it's just five vaginas. Wait, okay, I never understood how like is the baby born into the pouch? So the pouch? No, here's what happens it's born from? So but it has to uh like sex vaginas that the kangaroos, the men the man the men kangaroos put their penis in, and male kangaroos have I think just one. But I didn't research that because who cares about men? About them? Apparently? What's your level? Air battle? Oh? Yeah, because I think that it's catching because now I have too Well we're done pretty soon, um there are I like, how so far off we've gotten fre but u and I'm not going to get any of this information right because I didn't google this enough. But kangaroos have to like sex vaginas and then a separate one that they actually give birth out of, and then they give up birth like it's a tiny little like one inch long kangaroo baby and it crawls up from the vagina into the pouch and then it like germinates there. It crawls up like I did, and they're like pocket They're like so small and they're like hairless and freakish looking. It's dissisting or it's the miracle of life. So the vagina is clearly near the tail and then it just yeah, it has to crawl up like latches. Are you looking at pictures? And then Koala bears have that. It's like a maggot. Yeah, yeah, so it so it's horrifying maggot. Why are they like that? Oh my god? It's because I don't know if they're like born prematurely and then they have to like can I develop into the bears are bugs and I didn't know how do they know? How do they know where the pouches instinct? I guess that looks like something tomorrow and Pombo would eat. Yeah, the and then a Koala bears have two vaginas and two verses and all of them have chlamydia. So fun fact about coal bears like a mesh bag. It's a live guy. But that's a weird photo so unfortunately you do not have an orgasmic clitteris castle. You did not answer all the questions correctly, but guess well, so there was with men. That's the good Vie Cold always still fake it and fake it um I have you guys? Ever, I've never faked one. Really, yeah, I've I've faked some more convincingly than others. Some some I've been given a stern look at the end, like we both we both know what that was, just being like, yeah, I think maybe I packed one, like once or twice. But now whenever guy's like, oh, did you did you come, I'm just like, did you do anything to make me come? No? Someone asked me that question, do you punch him? The last time someone asked me that question, I was like, don't ask me. That gave him his answer. Uh. So Also, I'm really selling myself. I don't fake orgasms. Pretty Vagina and me and David Boyd the same birthday, so it's like, yeah, you're doing a hard sell. Come on, guys, we have so many horny mail listen. Uh is there anything else we wanna mention or chat about before the movie? I mean, look, this is I think this movie we can look past the Bechdel test and just see that this is a fun romp you can all get behind. And it's written by an amazing writer as an amazing director, and it's a it's, it's the it's it's really encapsulated our childhoodshoods. Are you also a robot? This? I like the childhood. I like that. The moral of the story is that you got to become an adult sometime, but you can still tackle your goblin friends something and have a roll full of stuff down when friends. Did Dave the boy ever come back at the end though? Did he die? Like he die? He just like he's like, I've got to go hit on another teenage I've got another one thirteen year old wanting to not have to babysit. I really like that scene at the beginning was chilling to me when she was just picked it up and held it and was like, you cursed goblin baby. It's like he's so cute and he's wearing the words walt of outfit and he's a little blond baby. Yeah, and he was thrown too high And that's all all my thoughts on the movie. Give the step on, Give the step on the sequel, Yeah, for real. Uh well, we rate the movie on a scale of zero to five nipples, and so when we read it in the context of like how well did it portray the female characters. Um, so I'll go first. I usually rate it too highly and then I feel dumb. But that's why you go first. That's why I go first, and then everyone else. Let's me know how dumb I am. I'm gonna give it uh m hmm. I'm gonna give it a one point five because like pissing you off. And yeah, there's the peach, then other ones. Yeah, I've learned my lesson not to be so generous. Um, don't eat that peaching. There's that gross, like pseudo like attraction between the two of them and the peach. Another pussy reference could be because of the advice that they give you when you're a young man. They're like, does he act like you're eating a peach. I don't know what sex said class you took, but I learned about the epididymus. Hey, kids, just act like you're eating a peach and put your and you want to peach, just rub the head of your dick on the stag. Oh, where is the daycare in my school is probably why, oh, there are a lot of peaches getting fun. Alright, I have to go kill me. Yeah, I give it like one point five. One of them is, uh, what's his name? Hoggle Hoggle's nipple, which is disgusting, and then one of the half nipple is I don't know, I'm bad at this. I didn't take enough improv classes, so it's just a regular nipple. You're saying you didn't take enough improv classes is like like a compliment to your true Uh what's your rating, Jamie? Two sultry fifteen year old hard nipples for David Bowie. They're pointed at him, but they can't touch. Yeah, good, that's my rating. I'm going to give this a three because, first of all, you guys are putting your adult eyes on this movie. Okay, when you were fifteen you saw this movie, Like, okay, you're obsession with n sinc How old were you? I was probably twelve, And how old were they they were? Who knows, but you know what she wanted to do to them? I wanted to exactly exactly, So you're putting your adult eyes on this movie, Aaron. People who are going to see this movie are probably going to be teenagers because the hot topic, I'm sure it is running out of ship to sell. So they're like, let's bring back the Labyrinth right now. Actually they're doing pretty well with their uh the Nightmare for Christmas ship. But my first kiss was with a boy in a Jack Skellington sweatshirts. Oh, I was gonna say, awesome. I think my my first kiss was um was this kid Nate and I was I was wearing my I worked at a Hallow Halloween express. Hell yeah, and then my big orange Halloween I already grabbed my boob like like like a little like it and I was like, I was like, is this what it's supposed to be like? And then I was like, you need to call Like I was, I had a panic attacks, like you need to leave. Mom was on a beach and I didn't know what a boner was until it was against me and I was like and then we were standing on a rock and I almost fell off the rock. I like, I am a virgin. So so I finished three Okay, So I feel like she is not on a mission to fuck first of all, to get her take her bro and at the end she is like, you don't have control over me like I'm an independent woman. I'm strong and fearless. I'm gonna get this baby back. Um, you can't seduce me with your peach spells. Okay. And it's a peach spell okay. And she makes all these great friends and at the end she gets her brother back. And it's not about uh fucking, it's about becoming a woman. Okay. Fair, that's a fair assessment. I'm on board ticket, I'm barred with that. And that little baby grew up to be a steampunk Yeah, good for him. All's well, that ends well. I bet when he sleeps he still sees David Bowie, don't girls just staring down in his peach dreams? Millions of peaches peaches for me? Is that the caned peaches? One? I don't know can peaches? Yeah? Yes, I love vasiline. Something about putting vasiline. She know what you're talking? Oh wait, it's oh it goes right, he does that whol thing. No you're thinking of London. Oh that old sex to love it anyway. She don't use jelly racially jelly. She's Vasseline's vassiline. It's not the peach song at all. I think it's London. Well this is a great Yeah, I've had a great time. Thank you so much, Jenny for coming. Is there anything you want to plug? Where can people find you? See Jenny's AGREENO J N N Y z as in zebra I g R I N L And that's all my instas and Twitter, Twitter and snaps and all much ship and uh yeah, and then I'm gonna be at uh sketch Fest next month in San Francisco, and shit, what else am I gonna be? Go see Proba although by the time this comes out it might already be on DVD or something. Yeah, and go to my website for tour information. That just Jenny dot com. Thank you agains so much, Thank you guy. You can follow us on Twitter at becktel Cast. We've got followers, Yeah, we do have. We Sometimes I look at it and I'm like what, I'm like, wow, people like us. You can like us on Facebook also, um, we're just I think some people did that cast. Yeah, some people did that too. I can email us. I've been here. I cannot believe it's hey, straight from the source, it was happening here. I'm not a believer. You can also email us at the becktel Cast at gmail dot com your past sexual partner and you want to Yeah, let me let me know what my vagina was. Like, I'm very curious if I've got never there's any men out there the one and give me in a second, I would take it. Yeah, so emails about that and nothing else. And um, my past levers just want to call me to say hi, check in checking checking in? Is that? Oh? We should end it in two different ways too. Oh, like I say something, you say something entirely different. I was just want to do and I just want to do one more confident thing. Oh sure, Um, you go first, because I don't know what you're talking about. Okay, Wow, what a fun podcast we had today with our guests. Jenny's a green al My name is Jamie. I feel I've felt great this whole time, and I feel like my future is bright and I am having a good day and I like my outfit. Thanks for listening. That was wonderful. Okay, I M I'm gonna just f that back to myself later. H Jamie. I cherish you and I like that you are my co host and I have a great time doing this with you and Jenny. I cherish you to cherish. Thank you so much. Uh and and just like being my friend and stuff. You're so we're all really great war I know. Oh yeah, guys, Merry Christmas, Christmas, and Hanka is going to be on Christmas this year, and happy Hanakah and happy happy times all around for all of us. Really ending this fun episode on a solemn note. Everyone just go fun boy, get that ga, get fun by Peach, all right bye by