Rachel Lindsay Part 2 — Betrayal, Prenups, and Dating Today

00:00:02
Speaker 1: Welcome back everyone to Bachelor Happy Hour. We are here with Rachel Lindsay Part two. Let's get into it that did you even have time to process or be sad or did you immediately go into anger? Because I would have been angry having to read that in the tabloids. Over in person conversation, I write about.

00:00:20
Speaker 2: Finding out about the spousal support, like I didn't even that's insane.

00:00:23
Speaker 3: As much as you can.

00:00:24
Speaker 1: Tell us, yeah, I know, I've wont buy her book. We're going to be reading the book.

00:00:28
Speaker 4: And the book isn't like just a it's like it takes you through a journey, like it's the Essays Ago, so it takes you through.

00:00:36
Speaker 5: Like the journey of it.

00:00:37
Speaker 4: But I write about trying to describe what that moment felt like. So I don't want to give too much about that, but yeah, I mean it's you're it's so much because it all comes crashing crashing in. Like I woke up that morning thinking, okay, like I probably have to start looking if we're an attorney and you know, like our what's our living situation going to be like? And I need to go ahead and tell my family and that kind of thing. But not that so it all crashed in on me, and then it was just like go fight or flight, Like what am I going to do?

00:01:18
Speaker 1: Now?

00:01:18
Speaker 4: Everything is rushed when I thought we were just kind of kind of ease into this. But what I say is this all could have been very private. We could have handled it like in mediation. We could have done the Jason Momoa Lisa Bonet thing where it's like we're working on it, we file, and then the next day it's over because we've already worked the whole thing out, no drama.

00:01:40
Speaker 5: But I feel like because it was public, I.

00:01:42
Speaker 4: Am meant to talk about it to help somebody who is either struggling to decide where to go in their relationship, whether they're married, whether it's a long term partnership. It's public for a reason, and so the more I have talked about it, I get a lot of people who say thank you for talking about it in this way, because I think there's a lot of shame still in twenty twenty six when you talk about divorce, especially when you're younger and there's certain things that you still want, like a family. I've never dated on apps, it gets like a whole new world. Now I'm dating post being on TV. I've never dated. When I dated, before I was an attorney, I lived in a much more private life. So there's just so much that I want to talk about that I couldn't find that kind of information out there. And then I want to talk about getting through it, and I feel like I could help somebody else. This is writing to help somebody else.

00:02:35
Speaker 5: Get through it.

00:02:36
Speaker 4: Maybe you don't know how to date again, or be intimate again, or get through the shame or the embarrassment of it, or you know, like pick up the pieces, like where do you start? This is my story, but maybe it'll help somebody else get through it.

00:02:51
Speaker 5: But it's crazy.

00:02:52
Speaker 4: There's so much I haven't even talked about, and I think, you know, I do. I see negative things, which I mean, of course there's going to be negatve there's a positive side.

00:03:00
Speaker 5: There's got to be a negative side.

00:03:02
Speaker 4: I learned that early, very on, once I stepped into Bachelor Nation.

00:03:07
Speaker 5: You have to be able to accept both. But there are a lot of.

00:03:09
Speaker 4: People who think, oh, you know, she was she's pretends to be or she was pretending to be so real about it, and she was presenting this relationship to the world, but behind the scenes. Obviously that's not what it is, And to that I would say, it's like, well, what did you expect. Every time I got on the microphone, I was supposed to say, oh, I had a rough day. Brian and I were fighting today. We were arguing today. It's really tough. And let me tell you exactly what we were arguing over. We were working on it, so you know that it was a work and we were trying. We tried. You know, we were in therapy. We're trying to work on it. I'm not going to talk about the fact that, hey, we're in therapy and we're trying to work on our relationship. I don't think inviting people in in that way would have you know, we're trying to save it would have helped it at that at that time. So I wasn't being fake. It's just I'm living my life. But I'm not giving you every single detail about it. I wasn't lying. I know I did the Nick Vile interview that was like a couple of weeks before. At that time, I did not know we were about to get a divorce. I knew we were having issues, but everything I said was true. We did want to have kids, I still wanted to have kids because I wasn't planning on Hey, and I'm about to go file for this force.

00:04:26
Speaker 5: So it was real.

00:04:28
Speaker 4: It's just I don't think people knew, or maybe I wasn't being honest with myself about how bad it was. In the moment, I was also going through a huge loss. I just lost my grandmother. It was very very close with my grandmother, Like a few days was either the funerals a few days.

00:04:43
Speaker 5: Before I did that interview with Nick, or a few days after. So it's just a lot going on, But nothing was fake.

00:04:53
Speaker 4: I mean maybe if I was like, yeah, we're good, maybe we weren't good, but we were working on it.

00:05:00
Speaker 2: Yeah.

00:05:00
Speaker 1: Yeah, it feels like almost what he did was like on purpose to humiliate you.

00:05:07
Speaker 2: I think I said, yeah, I just I when Rachel says that, I think of what was he did? Like an interview with like a divorce like I don't even know coach that was actually.

00:05:17
Speaker 1: The woman real that he said he was like his mental health filed.

00:05:23
Speaker 4: He said things on that interview that I had never even personally talked about that were.

00:05:30
Speaker 1: What did he say?

00:05:32
Speaker 4: He talked about fertility and it wasn't even the truth of what he was saying. And I've never other than saying I wanted to have kids, I've never talked about that, like I've never nobody knows that, like the story with that, and I just was like, that's it, that's that's low.

00:05:52
Speaker 5: Yeah. Yeah, Like I was like wow.

00:05:54
Speaker 4: And just even the timing of all of that, it was advertised, it was.

00:05:58
Speaker 5: Like, oh, it's going to be part thing.

00:06:01
Speaker 4: It was a week after he was just awarded temporary support, so it's like you just got you know, and all this is public. It's like, you just got awarded like thirteen thousand dollars a month. Why are you now putting out this video? It's just all of it was. I kept thinking, I can't be surprised about anything else that comes out, and then something else would happen and it was like my gosh, like everything it would.

00:06:28
Speaker 5: Just shock me. For that whole twenty twenty four.

00:06:31
Speaker 4: It's like stuff just kept happening, and I was just kept saying, who is this person?

00:06:37
Speaker 5: Who is this person?

00:06:38
Speaker 4: Like people were like what did she do to him for him to be acting yes? And I can only fall on he was harboring all these feelings about me that I had absolutely no idea, because what else could motivate you to act in such a way.

00:06:57
Speaker 1: I think it's it's so crazy too because when everyone and found out about the spousal like support, I think you immediately got criticism because they were like, you're a lawyer, How did you not see this coming? Didn't he ask you not to have the prenup?

00:07:11
Speaker 5: Yeah, so I.

00:07:13
Speaker 3: Think did. I don't think I knew that.

00:07:15
Speaker 4: There's a lot that gets lost in the prenup conversation. So at the time that we were gonna get married, as twenty nineteen, we were way more on equal footing.

00:07:26
Speaker 5: I didn't have the success that I had.

00:07:28
Speaker 4: I hadn't even I didn't even started the Bachelor podcast Happy Hour at the time. It was like, right the wedding was right around the time we started that. So I was still freelancing a lot. I was investing in myself, so I would pay for a lot if I was doing a TV parents, I usually had paid for my flight in my hotel, so it was totally different. I'd stopped practicing law at that moment. That year, in twenty nineteen, we were on equal footing. He owned a condo in Miami. He was older, so he had built up, you know, more of a savings than I had. So when I said, hey, I think we should get a prenup, and he explained his reason why, it's and I'm again, I'll write about this.

00:08:08
Speaker 5: It's easy to say you would say you would.

00:08:11
Speaker 4: It would be a deal breaker for you when you don't have that person, when you're at that crossroads you're planning your wedding. It's against some of the things about.

00:08:19
Speaker 5: The societal pressure, some of the some other.

00:08:22
Speaker 4: Things surrounding it that I was like, I don't want this to be the reason that we don't make it, because you never think that that the person is capable of doing what happened to me. Never in my wildest dreams did I think that, Nor did I have the success that I had. And if I did get that, I thought we would both have it. I could never have projected that our careers would would be so different, that the disparity would be so great between us. I don't think he saw it that way at the time.

00:08:50
Speaker 5: Either.

00:08:51
Speaker 4: We believed in each other. I believed in him, he believed in me, And so yeah, I said, I think we should get it. He said, no, I didn't want that to be the reason. So I I just was like, okay, fine, fine, we won't get a prenup. And you talk to people more, more people than you think don't get prenups. More most lawyers that I know don't have a prenuph. I think it's just an easier thing to say. I think it's way more common, Thank goodness. I think everybody should get one. But yeah, like I get I don't even get mad when people say it. I did it initially, and I'm just kind of like, you know what, Fine, Yeah, I'm dumb. I didn't get an attorney. I met a guy on reality TV. I'm not get an attorney get a prenup. I met a guy on reality TV. Yes, I'm an attorney. It's just that shoudn't even matter it's on reality TV. I should have got a prenup.

00:09:39
Speaker 5: I get it.

00:09:40
Speaker 3: Yeah.

00:09:40
Speaker 4: I mean that could be the title of my book. I'm dmbe I didn't get a prenup. Like, I accept it. I just I just accept it. Now people want to say that, like that's so old. Say something else now at this point, like it happened that we're divorced, it's settled.

00:09:53
Speaker 5: I've paid them off.

00:09:55
Speaker 1: It's someone here.

00:09:58
Speaker 5: It sucks, so thank you.

00:10:00
Speaker 4: But it's like, it is what it is, it happened, learned for me. Please don't be me. That's what I say at the end of the day. But yeah, there's there's a lot that went around that, and I just think that it's it's easy. I think if I was reading the headline out would be like, how did that girl and I get a prenup? I would do the same things. I just don't get mad anymore when people say it.

00:10:23
Speaker 1: I feel like when you get it, or asking for a prenup though you're about to start your life with someone, doesn't getting a prenup almost feel like you're predicting it to end.

00:10:31
Speaker 3: And that's what he's conversation.

00:10:33
Speaker 2: No, And I think that's what a lot of people like, you know, I've even asked about it.

00:10:37
Speaker 3: I'm like, oh should I should I not? And it's like, oh, do you love this person? Do you not? And it's like, no loving And at the time.

00:10:45
Speaker 1: You thought you could.

00:10:46
Speaker 4: The person you marry is not the person God forbid if it gets that to that point, it's not the person you divorce.

00:10:52
Speaker 5: It's just not.

00:10:52
Speaker 4: Because there's things that have happened that have led you to this place. And so there's this great company called prenup and they make it very easy for you, and they have a way of destigmatizing prenups that it's a conversation of a state planning. You're planning for so like look at it like that, like we're building something together, Like it's a it's like an insurance plan. You would get insurance together, right, so you get insurance for your house, you get insurance.

00:11:22
Speaker 5: For your car.

00:11:23
Speaker 4: You're not planning on getting in a wreck. You're not, but it could happen. You just don't know.

00:11:28
Speaker 5: You're not planning on something happening a flood or something that happened.

00:11:32
Speaker 4: But you protect yourself and as you're bringing other people into your marriage like kids, and you just want to protect it.

00:11:38
Speaker 5: And I think that's the way you look at it.

00:11:41
Speaker 4: Look at it like it's this state planning, just protecting this beautiful future that you're building together. And that's the way that Hello, prenup talks about it. And so I think if you look at it through that lens, rather than you know, we're planning on getting this just means like we're planning on our end you're not. You're just protecting each other and all of this. Yeah, and if you trust each other, like flip the word trust, right, Oh, I trust you, so we're not going to get it. Well, don't you also just trust me so we can get it. I just feel like it kind of goes both ways, absolutely, And you know, I wish I was talking like this seven years ago when it came down to it, but I didn't.

00:12:22
Speaker 2: Do you do you feel like intoday, like the present day, do you have any I guess I don't want to say. I mean, I know we thrown the word resentment around a lot, but do you have like resentment towards like the spousal support and having to like go through with all of that.

00:12:38
Speaker 3: Yeah.

00:12:39
Speaker 4: I you know, it's sad because I thought it was going to be amicable and I would have loved to have like be sitting here now with you guys and like saying like.

00:12:49
Speaker 5: Yeah, it didn't work out. We just crew different ways.

00:12:51
Speaker 4: And you know, I have a lot of love for him and all like I wish and I wish him the best, like I wish that is how it would have been. I feel none of that, Okay, I feel none of that and I definitely spousal support was probably the thing I would not have been.

00:13:14
Speaker 5: Would I have wanted to give half of what I had?

00:13:16
Speaker 4: No, but I would have been down for that. And like there were conversations, there was just no negotiating, there was no compromising. I would have been so fine with just saying, fine, take half.

00:13:33
Speaker 5: But the spousal support is really eats it me.

00:13:39
Speaker 4: Even still to this day, it's like, really, how did he get awarded that when he quit his job immediately after your season?

00:13:49
Speaker 1: Isn't that like his decision?

00:13:50
Speaker 5: Yes, that was before we were married, so like it.

00:13:53
Speaker 4: Doesn't just like like what always gets lost in conversation. People will be like, well, he deserves half because he moved for her. He moved to Dallas, he moved to LA Does nobody remember that I quit being a lawyer and moved to Miami for a year and a half. I do not like Miami. I moved to support him. I moved to supports. Nobody talks about that. But a marriage I felt like was give and take.

00:14:21
Speaker 5: It's compromise. He moved for me, I moved for him.

00:14:24
Speaker 4: That's why I was like, fine, I'll give you, I'll give you half of it, but the court, it's California.

00:14:28
Speaker 5: Is really tough. Every every state is different. We got married in Florida.

00:14:32
Speaker 4: That was another thing reason I was okay with signing the prenap because Florida is not community property. So it was kind of like, well if if I didn't think we were gonna move to La So it's like, yeah, for saying in Florida too, It's.

00:14:43
Speaker 5: It's not it's not California. It's not a say like that.

00:14:46
Speaker 4: So it's just what happened was while he got rewarded so much, a temporary it's they take your tax returns, what did you make over the marriage versus with this person, and they split it in half. And so because he was building a business and wasn't making anything, which again, if you think about what I just said, it refutes it refutes some of the things that he said because if you know, everything was so great in Miami, why was this disparity so big? But it's just takes like what I made what he made monthly, and they split it and that's how you it got thirteen thousand. It's temporary. It's temporary. So once once to be settled on the divorce, that that payment was no longer necessary. So that's another thing. People think I'm still paying thirteen thousand. That ended the moment that we settled. God like, I settled on the amount of spousal support as well.

00:15:47
Speaker 5: That's part of the reason.

00:15:48
Speaker 1: I mean, we've talked about this before. I just cannot understand how this man is not embarrassed me too. He took much from you. It feels like to start a new life without you, without you even knowing that this was going to happen.

00:16:03
Speaker 5: Yeah, it you.

00:16:04
Speaker 4: Know, I was really angry about it in the beginning, and then I realized that I had to let go of that to move on. I let go of it earlier than I thought. So even when I talk now, I'm not angry, you know, do I hate like, I don't like the spousal support part of it by any means, I still don't. I don't agree with that, and I'm not angry about it. But yeah, I would think you'd be embarrassed. But I guess, you know, I, yeah, he took money for me, But I guess I got to look at it like it's money that I earned.

00:16:40
Speaker 5: I can make it back.

00:16:41
Speaker 4: It sucks that I, you know, felt like I was doing things financially right, and I was putting money in certain places and I was building something and he took that. Yes, but I made it before and it may take me longer, but I can make it again. I'm like, you had to take because you never made it, and like so I just kind of just it's easy, kind of when I put it in that context.

00:17:06
Speaker 5: To let it go.

00:17:08
Speaker 4: Yeah, you had to do that, but I made it. So it's like I've I can do it again. I just have to kind of, Yeah, I just I believe in myself. That's why I said before or maybe one of you said it. It's like it took a year, you know, Yeah, it's a financial setback for sure.

00:17:26
Speaker 5: It still is. I'm like crawling out.

00:17:28
Speaker 4: Of a hole with it. But I paid it off in a year. I'm still standing. I still have things. I feel better than ever. I'm working and building.

00:17:40
Speaker 5: Thank you.

00:17:41
Speaker 4: So it's like you didn't you didn't, you didn't take for me kind of likes things that mean the most you didn't take. In certain ways, I've blossomed so much more post divorce that almost divorce has been a doorway for me for so much more, Like it's opened excuse me, it's opened up the door. I don't want to say he did me a favor, but it's like, yeah, he took money, but he.

00:18:10
Speaker 5: Like didn't take me for me, you know what I mean?

00:18:13
Speaker 4: Like yeah, like so it's the things I have are so much more valuable than that.

00:18:19
Speaker 5: It sucks, but yeah, yeah, absolutely.

00:18:22
Speaker 2: You really are such like I mean, I know it's like probably insane for me to say this, but like always have been an inspiration, but just like how you carry yourself and just find yourself like able to carve paths that I think for a lot of people like struggle with for a really long time. It's it's just for all of us, just an inspiration. And I think that's the best way that you know, I could I could frame it without making something heavy like divorce, like you know, but.

00:18:51
Speaker 5: Yeah, we appreciate it.

00:18:52
Speaker 1: You have a barrier, you break through it and then trans that like to a level that's like it really is so insane, And I think so many people, I for one, cannot wait to read this book.

00:19:03
Speaker 4: I I gotta get you.

00:19:07
Speaker 5: I got it. I thank you for saying that.

00:19:09
Speaker 4: That's so sweet, And I also want because and this is again why I wrote the first one because going back to how The Bachelor Bachelorette portrays us, and it makes it seem like we have all the answers and we figured it out. I wanted to write a book that shows that a lot of the most of the times I don't, but I work through it, and that's hard and messy or whatever, and I get to another side of it and I learned something from it.

00:19:34
Speaker 5: Yeah, maybe I'm still learning.

00:19:36
Speaker 4: That's how this divorce is. I want you to know that I can talk about it now. I'm two years past that that dreadful day of the filing, and I get emotional when I think about where I was on that day.

00:19:53
Speaker 5: I've never felt that. I hope to never feel that again.

00:19:57
Speaker 4: But when I think about that and then where I it now, that's what I want to write about because I did not think I could get through that.

00:20:07
Speaker 5: I really had.

00:20:10
Speaker 4: I was unrecognizable to myself and then I would have to put on a face to podcasts or to do an event. But I was a shell of myself for a while, and I really want to write to that.

00:20:22
Speaker 5: So thank you.

00:20:23
Speaker 4: I'm so glad that that's the way you see me now. But it took a lot of work and a community to help me get back to a better place, and I really want to speak about that, Like, yeah, I want to give the t and I want to explain certain things that maybe answer people's questions of why I might have had might have had have to put on a face, or why there wasn't stuff on social media, or why I said.

00:20:48
Speaker 5: This in an interview. I want to explain that.

00:20:50
Speaker 4: But I also want people to understand the work and the journey and the hard days and that get you to this place, but that you can get there.

00:21:00
Speaker 5: And that's really that's really what the book is about. You too, can you can get them And it's going.

00:21:07
Speaker 2: To be so helpful for like, yeah, I mean women, but like everybody, Like there's like you said, it's a lot more common than I think people know, or just again, it's not really an open conversation and this is just going to be helpful for so many people, so I hope.

00:21:25
Speaker 5: So, yeah, I have to.

00:21:26
Speaker 1: Tell you you're the only bachelor biography memoir that I've read, and I rented missed Me with that at my library. I remember renting it, and I love especially for this book because I feel like there's so many things people talk about you online, and you kind of let people like run with the narrative. And I love that you just get good finally take this book and be like, here's like what happened and if you want it, read it and buy it and pre sale and I'm so excited. Are you done? You still?

00:21:58
Speaker 5: We are working on it.

00:21:59
Speaker 4: I have written it, written quite a bit, but I'm not done by any means. It's funny like I'll have these conversations and then I think of something else. Oh wait, something you were gonna say, not the book, not miss me with Oh gosh.

00:22:13
Speaker 1: That's people just like run with the narrative.

00:22:15
Speaker 5: Thank you.

00:22:16
Speaker 1: Just kind of like I feel like a lot of times I never see you clapping back or talking about what actually happened.

00:22:22
Speaker 4: I like, I'll give a little like bread crumbs. I used to when I came off the Bachelor Bachelorette. I used to clap back at people all the time, by the way, like I'd be on I would say stuff and then I was like I have to stop. I have to like this is Rachel. They don't they don't know you.

00:22:36
Speaker 5: The people that know you, gee, that's it.

00:22:41
Speaker 3: I used to I'll get there. I'll get there.

00:22:43
Speaker 5: I used to.

00:22:44
Speaker 4: But I have to give credit to my lawyer, shout out to Laura Wasser, because she was kind of I wanted to fight back in the divorce with the media, Like I kind of was like, I have a microphone, you know, I've worked in it. I know how to use the media to get the narrative out there that I want. And she was just like, don't do it, don't do it. It's and I'm so glad. I think the divorce would have gone on longer. I think that I would have become obsessed with that. I think I would have lost myself in it. It was just just been so much messier. And it was like, let people just talk.

00:23:22
Speaker 1: Let him talk.

00:23:23
Speaker 5: That's the game that he's playing, play the long game. Let it in.

00:23:30
Speaker 4: And I got myself together. Remember I said I was a shell of myself.

00:23:33
Speaker 5: I wasn't.

00:23:34
Speaker 4: So if I would have been doing that, it would have come from such a bad place. Now I've done the work, so I can write from a place of healing or you know, because I'm still healing, I will I'll never say that I'm you know, I'm not fully healed right now, but I can write from such a healthier place. And I'm so glad that she gave me that advice and told me not to do that. And yeah, and so it's like now I can say it. I could say it all at once, you know, we could be done. I could tell my story, my narrative and get that said. Like, I never leaked anything to the media. I might have said something on my podcast and it got picked up, but I never played that game anything.

00:24:14
Speaker 3: I didn't do that.

00:24:16
Speaker 2: It was really good you you held it down. But speaking of letting people talk before we leave, we obviously are so curious to know what is your future in this franchise, what does that look like?

00:24:28
Speaker 3: Can you answer that?

00:24:30
Speaker 4: I mean, as bachelorettes, you can always keep me near and dear. I love the bachelorettes. You know, it's like there's such a bond there. Sometimes, you know, we have a group chat. Sometimes we talk all the time.

00:24:44
Speaker 5: We don't talk. We go months.

00:24:46
Speaker 4: One of these days, trist is going to be successful in planning that bachelorette trip.

00:24:50
Speaker 1: True, you could do nothing without Trist.

00:24:53
Speaker 4: So great, so great, and when we all get together, there's just so much love. So you know, by heart is with the bachelorettes the future of the franchise.

00:25:02
Speaker 5: Who knows?

00:25:03
Speaker 4: Did I think five years ago that I would be sitting back on Bachelor Happy Hour with two bachelorettes talking about the franchise from something we filmed that I was a part of.

00:25:14
Speaker 5: No, so who knows? Who knows? Who knows?

00:25:18
Speaker 4: I mean, I will be on anything ANYTIMEE sued. I'm not planning on popping back on anybody's season except for what we already did as bachelorettes. But yeah, you know, you never know.

00:25:29
Speaker 5: You'll talk five more.

00:25:31
Speaker 1: Years, never know, you never know.

00:25:34
Speaker 5: I can't now.

00:25:34
Speaker 4: Look I'm here now. I thought no, but you know it's not letting you've changed.

00:25:39
Speaker 6: Yeah, I have to tell a story.

00:25:42
Speaker 1: One year ago, me and Rachel were at dinner and this is for Megan's for Meganize, And this is when I was in my Hinge era and I was swiping on Hinge and I found Brian on Hinge and I reported him for domestic terrorism. I'm that man's probably still on the app to this day that I need people to know that I'm out here doing the work.

00:26:08
Speaker 4: I love that level of pettiness that.

00:26:12
Speaker 1: You have a Hinge and right after as he.

00:26:17
Speaker 4: Should, as he should, I mean, listen, I should not know and you were doing the work on yourself.

00:26:23
Speaker 1: He's on hinge it how to have been early? Whin's Megan's birthday?

00:26:27
Speaker 5: Megan's in June?

00:26:28
Speaker 1: Yeah, or summer.

00:26:32
Speaker 4: I feel like they say when a woman has done, she's been done for a while. That's so true, and even working on it, like you know it's over, but you're still just like I want to say that I tried every single thing I could before it's ending, but like you know, you know it's done. But I feel like I put myself out there. But I haven't been on a dating app, but I on dating apps before we got together, so it's not shocking that you know, he was on the app after Like that's that's his form of dating, so it doesn't shock me.

00:27:05
Speaker 5: Should good for him, but for.

00:27:06
Speaker 4: Me, I feel like it didn't take me as long as I thought to just go out there and have fun, Like situations just kind of presented.

00:27:14
Speaker 5: Themselves to me.

00:27:15
Speaker 1: Well, of course, I mean, and.

00:27:17
Speaker 4: I but I was a shell of myself, Like it's all right about it. But the way you feel after something like that, the way you feel after something like that, it's just you know, I yeah, yeah, Like I have another friend going through a divorce right now, and I feel like I've become her coach.

00:27:34
Speaker 5: She's like, well, how do you feel about this?

00:27:36
Speaker 4: I'm like, gosh, I gotta write this because there's so many people who have questions about the little things. But yeah, no, I that's so hilarious. I love that so much too. Yeah, I'm totally dating again, and it's it's you know, for him again.

00:27:55
Speaker 5: I good luck.

00:27:56
Speaker 4: I mean, everybody gloves everybody, but I do. I think people are easier on men. So I don't think I mean, I don't think it'll be hard for him by any means.

00:28:04
Speaker 1: I think it should be.

00:28:05
Speaker 5: I don't think it'll be.

00:28:06
Speaker 4: It maybe, but it you know, I maybe he's better, who knows, who knows, I know my experience with him. Look at me being nice.

00:28:15
Speaker 1: I know, Rachel, if I know nice, Maybe I'm paying. Maybe I'm just still not over I'm so angry, you know.

00:28:26
Speaker 4: Maybe he's different, Like that's my experience with him. I just I would I would hope that he's not out here raising terror, like like it's not the same with me.

00:28:36
Speaker 1: Yeah, Like I like this.

00:28:37
Speaker 5: I think it's I couldn't written book last year. Last year, it would have been a burn book, like.

00:28:43
Speaker 4: He is, yeah, no, no, no, no.

00:28:49
Speaker 5: But that's that.

00:28:50
Speaker 6: I love that story and truly, I I'm excited.

00:29:00
Speaker 1: Are you going to share anything in the book about how your dating life has been?

00:29:05
Speaker 3: Oh?

00:29:05
Speaker 4: Yeah, you know it's yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll probably I'll talk about like some of the dates because like my big one of my biggest fears about dating. And I mean, Charity, you're not in this conversation.

00:29:18
Speaker 1: But this is.

00:29:21
Speaker 5: I do you fear that someone?

00:29:24
Speaker 4: Because I went on this one day and the guy did not know I was the bachelorette, which is great, but it naturally is going to come out because I have to say I'm divorced, and then it's then it becomes well how did you meet your ex husband?

00:29:39
Speaker 5: And then you have to talk about it. And so immediately when I.

00:29:41
Speaker 4: Said it, he was like, oh that's right, Like I remember when everybody was talking about it. Then they want to ask questions about your experience. So it's like, are you getting to know me because you like me and you want Mike, you want to get to know me because that's part of my story, or are you just so curious about what it's like to be on reality TV. And that's the scariest thing about dating post Bachelorette.

00:30:07
Speaker 5: Are you in it for me? Are you just in it to my story? Are you curious? So you've probably had I have the.

00:30:13
Speaker 1: Same exact story. I was seeing a guy and I met him through someone and he somehow didn't have social media, and I kept it from him for so long, but it got to the point that he'd be like, Oh, how do you know this friend? And it would be like my friend Genevieve who was on my season, And I was like, Okay, eventually I do have to tell him. And right after I told him, man, and then you go back and forth and you're like, I don't want to lead with this because this isn't who I am, but it's such a big part of me, and it's so hard to find someone and Charity knows that I'm going through this that is supportive and can understand me, because it feels like sometimes if they have not been through it, they can't understand.

00:30:52
Speaker 4: Right right, you become now the reality TV star and they probably have had all these pre conceive notions about or assumptions about what a reality TV star is.

00:31:04
Speaker 5: And so they start to look at you through a different lens.

00:31:06
Speaker 4: It's almost good to just get it out at the beginning, but I it's.

00:31:11
Speaker 5: That's the scariest part about it.

00:31:13
Speaker 1: I don't want to leave with it because then also what kind of a person are you? If you're like, oh, yeah, you want to like be with me because of that.

00:31:19
Speaker 4: Or you get the you look familiar, Oh that is where do I know you from?

00:31:25
Speaker 3: Yes, I'm like you tell me.

00:31:27
Speaker 4: And then you're like me, you try to say everything, but you're like, I'm like I just have one of those faces.

00:31:33
Speaker 5: And they're like no, no.

00:31:35
Speaker 1: No, I saw you on ESPN like no, yeah, I was.

00:31:39
Speaker 5: There, Like they keep pressing right, just give it up, like oh well I have a podcast.

00:31:45
Speaker 4: No no, And then I'll try to say like, oh, are you from Texas.

00:31:49
Speaker 5: That's not it.

00:31:51
Speaker 1: I don't know if I told that, but she saw you on billboards most likely I get.

00:31:55
Speaker 4: It's like oh, and then they're like that's it. When you finally have to say it, and.

00:31:59
Speaker 5: It's like oh, here we go, here we go.

00:32:03
Speaker 1: Yeah, are you with someone now or are you still like dating around?

00:32:08
Speaker 5: No, I'm dating someone. Yeah, yeah, I love this.

00:32:12
Speaker 1: I know, I know, but we are obviously so happy and so excited for you. This is such like a new chapter for you, and no one is more supportive than me and Charity.

00:32:22
Speaker 2: We're just happy this book club and we will be to a book club.

00:32:29
Speaker 1: No, I want I should you just hear Rachel wants to do a book with us.

00:32:32
Speaker 4: Should we do like a bachelorette reading time?

00:32:37
Speaker 1: It's just I'm already saying I'm putting in the group chatwards my phone.

00:32:41
Speaker 5: No, actually know, I gotta finish.

00:32:43
Speaker 1: Everyone hit pre order as soon as this goes on sale.

00:32:46
Speaker 5: Yeah, I gotta finish this. That's yeah, I feel tired to go.

00:32:52
Speaker 3: We'll make it happen. Don't you worry?

00:32:56
Speaker 1: You have no idea what's about to happen?

00:32:59
Speaker 5: I know, guod thing people are like, didn't you sign it? Didn't you have an NDA in your settlement? On purpose? That purpose?

00:33:08
Speaker 1: That was?

00:33:08
Speaker 3: That's a smart thing.

00:33:09
Speaker 1: That you can take your money, not your voice, not my story, not my story.

00:33:15
Speaker 5: That's like a thing.

00:33:16
Speaker 4: It's it's temporary, right, money goes especially at La.

00:33:21
Speaker 1: Good luck and he's still here in La.

00:33:24
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, it's crazy.

00:33:27
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I cannot I cannot still wrapping my head. I know, we like we could not be more happy that you decided to come back on the podcast you started.

00:33:39
Speaker 3: We're not we're literally not going, but it's crazy.

00:33:43
Speaker 4: It's your podcast here, and like it's so I'm so excited for you guys. I said this at the beginning, but this is how it started for me seven years ago. That's your happy hour. I really feel like I curated my voice, my opinion. Everybody who works here is so supportive, you know, like you learn to say things that because like, let's just dispel this myth. Everyone's like, oh, it's corporate. There, you're saying what you're supposed to say.

00:34:10
Speaker 5: No, you're not.

00:34:11
Speaker 4: You might have to interview somebody you don't want to want to, but these are your opinions. And I'm like just so excited to see where this takes you.

00:34:20
Speaker 5: It really does like it.

00:34:21
Speaker 4: I never could have imagined starting here would lead me to do so many other things, but yeah, you guys.

00:34:28
Speaker 5: Are gonna be crash.

00:34:29
Speaker 1: No literally, and Charity weren't even born into Bachelor Nation yet, and hopefully we can carry your legacy a little. You already are you always have just done so much for this and hopefully you can give us. I'm gonna call you. We have to start interviewing the men.

00:34:42
Speaker 5: Because okay, okay, I'm gonna take something back.

00:34:49
Speaker 4: So I am watching this season and I you know, I'm on the Ringer Network and they have a Bachelor podcast. So well, this is news, you guys. This is I'll give you this breaking news. I'm totally going to recap with them on the show, which means the best news I've heard all this, which means.

00:35:09
Speaker 5: I'll be watching and I'll be up to date.

00:35:12
Speaker 4: So I would come back on your show and talk about the season because.

00:35:15
Speaker 1: I'll be watching. Can you guys hear this? I would do that.

00:35:23
Speaker 4: For this season, for this season because I'm already doing it. It's like why, how why would I not come back and like do a show with you guys watching, Because now I have seen the man.

00:35:36
Speaker 5: I'm mad. I need to person you. Oh yeah, you need to come in person. Yeah yeah, make it make it for like mental yeah are I'm not going to the recording. I'm not gonna go. I'm not gonna go.

00:35:51
Speaker 1: I'm pushing the film, pushing my boundaries. I said she's coming.

00:35:56
Speaker 5: Please, I'm not gonna go do that she gives.

00:35:58
Speaker 1: Us an inch.

00:35:59
Speaker 4: We're like and then you but I will record with you.

00:36:02
Speaker 5: Guys, I've already regarded We've.

00:36:05
Speaker 1: Got some iconic interviews with men of the Bacherette, and I feel like we have so much to look up to in that way, Like your interview with Jed is obviously iconic.

00:36:16
Speaker 5: It was one of the first. If was it it was I think it was the first.

00:36:19
Speaker 1: Was it?

00:36:20
Speaker 4: If it wasn't, it was right, It was like top it was like one of the first three.

00:36:24
Speaker 1: And I talked about this before you came in that he came in so happy, so.

00:36:31
Speaker 4: Let's beget because I just knew no one else was gonna go. Like I had so many questions, and I think that that was like if I'm gonna if I would give any advice, It's like say the things that people are too afraid to say, ask the questions that people are too afraid to ask or they can't ask.

00:36:50
Speaker 5: And that was me.

00:36:50
Speaker 4: It's like I have so many questions, shed like and I don't know you, like I'm not reading for you, like I'm teeing Bachelorette, so like like you had to know coming in, like I am here to support Hannah in all things.

00:37:04
Speaker 5: So yeah, like I think bring that energy.

00:37:08
Speaker 4: I mean like you're nice too, because I was like that with Brendan because like my girl, I was.

00:37:19
Speaker 5: Like, Okay, here we go. No no, no, no, no no no.

00:37:23
Speaker 4: He had not been on I was. I was not recording that when he was on. I was so bothered by him when he was on Paradise. I don't think I was doing I can't because I was yeah.

00:37:40
Speaker 5: Yeah, I can't remember what year was that. I think I think it was after.

00:37:44
Speaker 4: I feel like I wasn't podcasting for Bachelor Happy Hour, but whatever, I couldn't have been because I was so upset. I went on I went on Bachelor what is the ringer one called Bachelor Party. I went on Bachelor Party to give my opinions.

00:37:59
Speaker 5: So I so, but I did.

00:38:00
Speaker 4: I wasn't nice to Noah when he came on. I wasn't nice to there. I wasn't nice to Brenton. I feel like when he came on, I wasn't.

00:38:09
Speaker 5: But you know it came.

00:38:12
Speaker 1: Yeah, I remember that, but we love no No So I was totally nice and then so be nice but like asked them the hard question.

00:38:21
Speaker 3: But sick, don't be afraid. Okay, good to know.

00:38:26
Speaker 1: Because we've it's kind of been easy because we've had people on who I feel like we've had a little bit of relationship and we're able to like talk, But when we got to you gotta separate it the hard question.

00:38:37
Speaker 5: I actually think that might be easier.

00:38:38
Speaker 2: It's like when you don't like I mean, it is easier just from like for banter purposes for people you know, but like interviewing, it's like I kind of what Rachel said.

00:38:45
Speaker 3: It's like I don't know you. I don't like there's no loyalty here.

00:38:48
Speaker 2: It's like I don't have to sit here in tiptoe around what's appropriate to ask.

00:38:52
Speaker 5: Don't get over it. Like I would say things and.

00:38:55
Speaker 4: Like I don't think Pilot Pete likes me, but I you know, like you'd say, I'd say things and you know, and then i'd see them and I'd be like, hey, what's up.

00:39:03
Speaker 1: Did anyone say you said this about me? Yeah?

00:39:07
Speaker 4: And I'd be like, put your problem, like you know, I would just be still nice, like I have a job to do whatever, it's fine, Like it's you know, I'm too week good job. But I was gonna say something about the the thinking that not ticking the knife in But.

00:39:24
Speaker 1: Oh, I forgot.

00:39:25
Speaker 4: I was going to give you advice about about something about about.

00:39:31
Speaker 5: Not about people not liking you. Oh, I can't remember.

00:39:35
Speaker 7: Confront in person about what we said, not that it was something along the lines I was gonna say, oh oh oh, yes, came to me, thank you y vance.

00:39:45
Speaker 5: So I yeah, I recently.

00:39:48
Speaker 4: Is in the book I've been recent with ADHD explains a lot so and I'm I'm testing out doses and every time I like it's too low.

00:40:00
Speaker 5: He's happening.

00:40:02
Speaker 4: I have to go through it, like I have to keep having the avoyments with a psychiatrist because he's like, it's like it's not working. So I Lisa G. Shout out to Lisa G. She's in was in the Telepictures Family. She's a trailblazer, she's a legend. She told me when I worked at Extra, and this is what I'll tell you. She said, two things should always come out.

00:40:25
Speaker 5: Of your interviews.

00:40:27
Speaker 4: You either need to break make news right like break some news, which you guys did. I just said that I was gonna be on Bachelor Party recapping. And two she said make a moment like create a moment because it's very.

00:40:43
Speaker 5: Hard to break news.

00:40:44
Speaker 4: It's very hard to get somebody to tell you something exclusively. So make a moment. That moment might be in your question, that moment might be in your reaction to something. That moment might be something you reveal in within the interview.

00:40:57
Speaker 5: But that's that.

00:40:58
Speaker 4: I will give you what she gave me the legend for a reason, and I took that into every interview.

00:41:04
Speaker 5: So make a moment or make news.

00:41:06
Speaker 1: And you do it may be in reporting somebody for domestic terrorism, and.

00:41:11
Speaker 3: That is such a Literally I came to dinner.

00:41:14
Speaker 1: I was like, Rachel, I have to tell you something. She didn't even know I did it. It was like probably a couple of weeks before I forgot. I was like, I have to tell you that I forgot.

00:41:24
Speaker 6: She's like, what you could do that?

00:41:26
Speaker 1: Well? I reported him and I wrote it in the little No.

00:41:29
Speaker 2: You can report anything because and will with pleasure.

00:41:33
Speaker 1: You're already doing it.

00:41:34
Speaker 4: You're already doing it, saying you every every episode will be great if you can do one of those are both well.

00:41:41
Speaker 2: I have so much to learn, but hopefully can we have a whole season and years ahead of us.

00:41:47
Speaker 5: Absolutely, onward and thank you.

00:41:50
Speaker 3: Guys so much. Rachel think, Yeah, I'm like, I'm counting down the days.

00:41:54
Speaker 4: For you to come back like truly and to make it a good one.

00:41:59
Speaker 5: I'm staying still March, so fingers crossed.

00:42:02
Speaker 1: So can you tell us? Oh wait, side note, we want to do an episode in Carry's apartment because I know you got his very first interview effort. Because Rachel is his favorite, we cat it be known. Would you come if we did an interview in Carry's apartment? Say no, you know, we just talked about dresses.

00:42:20
Speaker 5: I have a key.

00:42:21
Speaker 1: We can carry this apartments.

00:42:23
Speaker 5: Maybe I just might, or you.

00:42:24
Speaker 1: Can in the kitchen and we can look at you come through.

00:42:29
Speaker 3: Maybe Okay, Bachelor happy hour at Carrie. He's like the true bachelor happy hour.

00:42:34
Speaker 1: That will be a happy hour a little.

00:42:38
Speaker 3: That's a little moment.

00:42:40
Speaker 5: I'd be down for that. Okay, I'd be down.

00:42:43
Speaker 4: That's legend to legendary to not do to and you.

00:42:47
Speaker 1: Did the first one. He said he would never be on a podcast, and you got him. So we need you there. I will be there.

00:42:55
Speaker 5: I can't say no to my care beer.

00:42:57
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh my gosh, I don't even want this to end. I feel like we can't thank you enough. You are just such a legend. I think, beyond what you know, every Bachelorette has so much to learn from you, but even just what you've done after, I think, yeah, we just can't hype you up enough. You are so incredible. So I know the viewers think the same. Thank you so much for being thank you.

00:43:17
Speaker 5: Thank you, guys so sweet.

00:43:19
Speaker 4: I have such a hard time taking a compliment, so I'm just gonna say thank you. I'm not going to be self deprecating because that's today, but thank you, thank you.

00:43:26
Speaker 2: You deserve it all, and you've paved the way for so many of us. Just legendary, truly, and it will live one it will and I hope you know that.

00:43:34
Speaker 5: Thanks so guys, Yes.

00:43:36
Speaker 1: Well, we hope everyone enjoyed this as much as we did. And we can't wait to have Rachel back. So thank you again, Oh.

00:43:43
Speaker 3: My god, yes, yay, and thank you to all of our listeners. Be sure to subscribe.

00:43:49
Speaker 2: We have more exclusive interviews coming your way for this upcoming season of the Bachelorette, But until next time, We'll see you guys soon.

00:43:56
Speaker 1: Hi,