Celebrate Failure: Learn, Grow, and Evolve!

[SPEAKER_00]: Hey, grow squad, welcome to another week, another episode of the Eugene Hamilton podcast.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm so glad you tuned in.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm so grateful that you took time out of your busy schedule to just press play, right?
[SPEAKER_00]: To just press that little small button and allow some life to come into your life today as we take this journey, another week together, another moment together, and it's additional time for us to grow as the grow squad.
[SPEAKER_00]: So let's pray and get after it.
[SPEAKER_00]: God, we thank you.
[SPEAKER_00]: For today, thank you for the air that we breathe, thank you that we can breathe in, breathe out, thank you just for all the things that you've done for us.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I pray for my friends, wherever they might be, whatever they're in need of, I'm praying that you would know, they wouldn't know that you're with them every step of the way.
[SPEAKER_00]: Amen.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm inviting you today to do something that I've only recently learned
[SPEAKER_00]: how to do consistently.
[SPEAKER_00]: We know this to be true.
[SPEAKER_00]: All of us have the capacity to be great every now and then.
[SPEAKER_00]: All of us have the capacity to blow our own minds every blue moon.
[SPEAKER_00]: But the real winners in life I've discovered are just consistent people.
[SPEAKER_00]: I discovered that the secret sauce, the cheat code, is not magic.
[SPEAKER_00]: The cheat code is not even connection.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know what's funny?
[SPEAKER_00]: I think I heard Mark Whale Russell say this, not long ago.
[SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes we think the cheat code is getting into the right rooms.
[SPEAKER_00]: And there's a blessing in getting into certain rooms.
[SPEAKER_00]: I understand the sentiment there.
[SPEAKER_00]: But some of the rooms that we are dying to get in
[SPEAKER_00]: Some of those rooms, I think like that.
[SPEAKER_00]: Some of those rooms you like, man, how you got in here, right?
[SPEAKER_00]: Right.
[SPEAKER_00]: And in life, sometimes the secret sauce is not getting in the right role.
[SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes the secret sauce, the way that we
[SPEAKER_00]: learn and grow and develop and evolve.
[SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes it's not about a new course.
[SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes it's not about somebody promoting your stuff on on social media.
[SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes the cheat code is just being consistent.
[SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes, in fact, let me let me correct myself.
[SPEAKER_00]: The cheat code is absolutely showing up every day whether you feel like it or not.
[SPEAKER_00]: Showing up every day whether you won yesterday or you feel flat on your face.
[SPEAKER_00]: The cheat code is getting back up.
[SPEAKER_00]: I said, you know what?
[SPEAKER_00]: I said a pattern, crying, throwing the towel.
[SPEAKER_00]: I may have a moment where I'm upset, a moment where I have a tear, a moment where I say to myself, I can't believe this happened to me, but I have to get to a place where I'm so consistent that I get back up.
[SPEAKER_00]: Listen, man, my son.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, this dude, this dude has
[SPEAKER_00]: more scars on his body of four years old than I had at fourteen years old.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, he got a scar on his forehead where he fell off deliberately.
[SPEAKER_00]: This wasn't negligent parenting.
[SPEAKER_00]: This was negligent teachers watching this.
[SPEAKER_00]: This dude jumped off the top of a slide and fell fell on his face.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, nobody knew what was happening.
[SPEAKER_00]: The other day, we were at, um,
[SPEAKER_00]: It's into a playoffs.
[SPEAKER_00]: This guy is running around this little area where it's raised a bit so that they can have these toy cars inside and they can do bumper cars and he decides to get out of the car, run around in circles and before somebody could say, stop it.
[SPEAKER_00]: He slipped and pushed his lip.
[SPEAKER_00]: This dude got scars.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's interesting to me that when I go over there and try to see about him.
[SPEAKER_00]: When I go over there and try to even, you know, it's my boy.
[SPEAKER_00]: I try to pick him up.
[SPEAKER_00]: I try to wipe the blood away.
[SPEAKER_00]: He every, it without fail.
[SPEAKER_00]: I would say, let me let me correct that.
[SPEAKER_00]: Ninety-nine percent of the time.
[SPEAKER_00]: This is a hard fall unless he's like super stunned.
[SPEAKER_00]: He looks at me or he looks at his mother and he says, I'm okay.
[SPEAKER_00]: and he gets back after it.
[SPEAKER_00]: I said, man, this guy is a beast.
[SPEAKER_00]: He'll fall.
[SPEAKER_00]: He'll scrape his leg.
[SPEAKER_00]: He'll fall.
[SPEAKER_00]: He may have a little blood.
[SPEAKER_00]: He may fall.
[SPEAKER_00]: And there's a little bruised on his cheek.
[SPEAKER_00]: He'll get up.
[SPEAKER_00]: He'll say, oh, daddy, he wiped that.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm okay.
[SPEAKER_00]: Back at it.
[SPEAKER_00]: And gets mad.
[SPEAKER_00]: If we sit him down and say, hey, sit down for a minute.
[SPEAKER_00]: Take your breath, contemplate what happened.
[SPEAKER_00]: And no, no, no.
[SPEAKER_00]: He consistently gets back up.
[SPEAKER_00]: And in life, what I've learned recently, I should say on a more grander, a bit, a word, on a larger level, a larger scale.
[SPEAKER_00]: I've learned the power of consistently staying after
[SPEAKER_00]: and doing what you say it, you will go into do.
[SPEAKER_00]: Now, part of that requires you and I to build this muscle
[SPEAKER_00]: that pulls us in a direction that kind of separates the weak from the tear to use Bible terms, right?
[SPEAKER_00]: To kind of separate the weak from the strong, to kind of separate those who are average from those who are above average.
[SPEAKER_00]: People that consistently show up, right?
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, that's one thing.
[SPEAKER_00]: But then there are people who show up and they've learned how to celebrate their losses.
[SPEAKER_00]: They realized and recognized that, yeah, I won something, oh, maybe, let's do it in a week term, right?
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's just say on Monday, I had a win, but on Tuesday, I had a loss.
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's just say in my life, in my business, whatever it is that I'm doing, relationships, whatever it is, I find myself doing.
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's just say for a moment, in a given week, you had a day where you won and a day when you lost.
[SPEAKER_00]: By and large, I would almost put money on this, but I'm not a gambler.
[SPEAKER_00]: But by and large, you learn more about yourself, about your business, and about your goals that you're trying to reach on the day when you fail as opposed to the day when you won.
[SPEAKER_00]: There's something about failure that we need to learn how to take a microscope.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm talking about, I'm talking about, when we fail, we sometimes, something inside of us, especially those who are hungry.
[SPEAKER_00]: They'll set it themselves.
[SPEAKER_00]: Let me dissect what went wrong.
[SPEAKER_00]: Let me not overlook.
[SPEAKER_00]: That missed shot.
[SPEAKER_00]: Let me not overlook the fact that I couldn't close that deal.
[SPEAKER_00]: What could I have said differently?
[SPEAKER_00]: What was my what did I miss?
[SPEAKER_00]: Body language did I say the wrong thing?
[SPEAKER_00]: What what what did because when you win?
[SPEAKER_00]: All you doing is winning.
[SPEAKER_00]: Do you take care of it?
[SPEAKER_00]: All I do is win, win, win, no matter what.
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
[SPEAKER_00]: But what are you learning learning learning a matter of what?
[SPEAKER_00]: Right.
[SPEAKER_00]: I should do a re-bixer.
[SPEAKER_00]: All I do is learn learning a matter of what.
[SPEAKER_00]: Let me explain.
[SPEAKER_00]: Check it out.
[SPEAKER_00]: We should always be in the posture of a student.
[SPEAKER_00]: especially when we're having difficulty reaching a given goal aspiration or dream.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's funny because my wife and I will be celebrating another year wedding anniversary coming up a few weeks.
[SPEAKER_00]: And it's funny how
[SPEAKER_00]: As I reflect back over, I reflect back to you one to now.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I say to myself, man, not only have we learned a lot, but we're still learning.
[SPEAKER_00]: And our marriage has become stronger, not because of the winds.
[SPEAKER_00]: We've gotten tighter, we've gotten stronger, we've gotten better.
[SPEAKER_00]: We've taken an ale.
[SPEAKER_00]: When I say taking an ale, taking a loss, when I misread something, when I assumed that she meant this.
[SPEAKER_00]: So when I assumed that I had license to spend money here, when I assumed that, and it caused us to come together and discuss,
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, sometimes passionate discussions, you know what I was talking about.
[SPEAKER_00]: But discussions that bring us to a place where we have to reevaluate, have to really have hard conversations.
[SPEAKER_00]: We really have to pull back the layers and say to ourselves, you know what?
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, got you.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, okay.
[SPEAKER_00]: I took that ill on the chin.
[SPEAKER_00]: And here is what I learned from it.
[SPEAKER_00]: I want to invite you as I did last week.
[SPEAKER_00]: I want to invite you to start writing down.
[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't invite you to do this last week.
[SPEAKER_00]: I invite you to start writing something.
[SPEAKER_00]: But what I'm going to invite you to write down as you move forward now, it could be a physical write down or a mental.
[SPEAKER_00]: Take a mental note.
[SPEAKER_00]: What did I learn last week when I failed at the gym?
[SPEAKER_00]: What did I learn last week when I got so defeated that I cut my workout short?
[SPEAKER_00]: What did I learn?
[SPEAKER_00]: Am I as resilient as I thought I was?
[SPEAKER_00]: What did I learn last week when my boss and I clashed about an idea?
[SPEAKER_00]: What did I learn from that?
[SPEAKER_00]: When my sibling and I had a conversation on the phone, we'd discussion the family union and all of a sudden things went left.
[SPEAKER_00]: What did I learn?
[SPEAKER_00]: from that difficult conversation.
[SPEAKER_00]: I want to invite you to learn how to celebrate failure.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mentioned last week and I mentioned again without a positive and writing a book and one chapter of the book kind of elude to the fact that failure is not the end.
[SPEAKER_00]: So many people fail in life and they just cannot take, I don't know, what happened in their childhood or development, they just act like failure is the end of the world.
[SPEAKER_00]: Have you met people like that?
[SPEAKER_00]: They're like, man, if I, if I, if I, you know, if I have a hiccup in life, if something goes awry in life, if something goes left in life, all of a sudden, I think that the world is coming crashing down.
[SPEAKER_00]: And in reality, in most cases, what's happening is you need to just learn from that, refine your approach and get back after it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Listen, I, I, I really appreciate the broad James.
[SPEAKER_00]: But man, when I look at the late great Kobe Bryant, who I don't know if he still has the record, I don't keep up with another statistician.
[SPEAKER_00]: But at one point he held the record for the most missed shots in NBA history.
[SPEAKER_00]: Somebody says, oh man, you don't want to have that record.
[SPEAKER_00]: But I say, I say something a little bit different.
[SPEAKER_00]: This is like, it wasn't like he's going for that record.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't think anybody wakes up and say, you know what?
[SPEAKER_00]: Let me get the record for the most almost like Lenny Wilkins.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think had the most records for the most losses and the NBA coaching career, but I'm like, okay, but the do had to have long javety to last that long to hold the record.
[SPEAKER_00]: So there was something about his coaching genius that teams and owner still wanted to have around.
[SPEAKER_00]: And so in order to have their record, he had to coach for a long time Colby in order to have the record for the most missed shots.
[SPEAKER_00]: He had to develop something inside of him that says, I'm not afraid to take a shot.
[SPEAKER_00]: And if you've ever watched, go on YouTube.
[SPEAKER_00]: You've ever watched any Colby's games in your life.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know as well as I know that Kobe never met a shot that he didn't like.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, I remember the first time I actually started zooming in on his game, hello baby Afro, and he was playing against the Utah Jazz.
[SPEAKER_00]: I remember I am not a commentator nor am I, like I said, a statistician like that, but I can remember him airballing on more than one occasion in that game.
[SPEAKER_00]: And people like, why is he still shooting?
[SPEAKER_00]: He's coming up short.
[SPEAKER_00]: Why is he still taking those shots?
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, somebody got to take him.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I guess he said, why not me?
[SPEAKER_00]: And I got, let me ask you right now.
[SPEAKER_00]: Why aren't you taking more shots?
[SPEAKER_00]: Why are I talking right to you?
[SPEAKER_00]: Put your ear, put, hear me out.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you're listening, if you're watching, let me ask you.
[SPEAKER_00]: Why are you still beating yourself up over the last loss you had, which was months ago?
[SPEAKER_00]: You still haven't taken another shot?
[SPEAKER_00]: What's been going on in your mind that makes you believe that you don't have it in you to take another shot?
[SPEAKER_00]: Let me
[SPEAKER_00]: because there's a book that I read that talks about the fact that we are not, we have not been given the spirit of fear.
[SPEAKER_00]: In fact, I read a quote the other day that I heard a great speaker referenced by Clinton Doyle, which simply said, if you can't beat the fear, do it scared.
[SPEAKER_00]: Right?
[SPEAKER_00]: In other words, we may give them the spirit of fear.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you got some kind of fear that's in your heart, God didn't give it to you, but if it's there, it's there.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not going to argue with you.
[SPEAKER_00]: God didn't give the spirit of fear, but wherever you picked up fear at in your life, hey, you're wearing it now.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I'm saying, and what Glenn and Doyle is saying, hey, if you can't shake it, do it scared.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm asking you right now to get off the sidelines.
[SPEAKER_00]: Lick your wounds.
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's get this sounds kind of off.
[SPEAKER_00]: Rub your wounds and get back after it.
[SPEAKER_00]: And in doing so, I'm inviting you to do two things or three things.
[SPEAKER_00]: Reflect.
[SPEAKER_00]: To go onto reflect.
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't break it down.
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't try to dissect.
[SPEAKER_00]: Just reflect on the moment of failure.
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't answer any questions about it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Listen, I'm telling this for a reason.
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't answer any questions about it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't beat yourself up about it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Just reflect on the moment that you lost.
[SPEAKER_00]: Take a moment to reflect on it.
[SPEAKER_00]: They can part the laws.
[SPEAKER_00]: Number two, now I want you to dissect and analyze the laws.
[SPEAKER_00]: What, what, what, when are I?
[SPEAKER_00]: What could you have done differently?
[SPEAKER_00]: What better advice did you take?
[SPEAKER_00]: What, what, what, what course did you, did you go down that cause you to end up at this dead end?
[SPEAKER_00]: What analyze it?
[SPEAKER_00]: Analyze it in such a way.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're writing down even now.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're saying, hey, listen, this is what I'm going to do the next time.
[SPEAKER_00]: And then when you finish that, realize the next time it's right now.
[SPEAKER_00]: So then take action.
[SPEAKER_00]: So three things.
[SPEAKER_00]: We're quickly reflect.
[SPEAKER_00]: Reflect on the air ball.
[SPEAKER_00]: Call me Brian.
[SPEAKER_00]: Reflect on the loss.
[SPEAKER_00]: Reflect on the moment of failure.
[SPEAKER_00]: Look back at it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Look, take a real good look at it.
[SPEAKER_00]: What happened?
[SPEAKER_00]: Who was there?
[SPEAKER_00]: Who was in the stands?
[SPEAKER_00]: Who was laughing?
[SPEAKER_00]: Take a real good look at.
[SPEAKER_00]: Reflect on the loss.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't realize it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Break it down.
[SPEAKER_00]: Like they're doing every sport to read them.
[SPEAKER_00]: Break down film.
[SPEAKER_00]: rewind.
[SPEAKER_00]: Pause.
[SPEAKER_00]: Look at it.
[SPEAKER_00]: dissect it, figure out what went wrong.
[SPEAKER_00]: What play you ran that caused you to go out of bounds?
[SPEAKER_00]: And then they don't say they're too long.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's too long as you need to.
[SPEAKER_00]: Because now you've got to put their plan in a motion.
[SPEAKER_00]: Because you're going to take action again.
[SPEAKER_00]: Hear me out.
[SPEAKER_00]: The next action that you take, even after you analyze, reflect and dissect.
[SPEAKER_00]: won't be perfect.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, it won't be perfect.
[SPEAKER_00]: I've been podcasting for over a year now.
[SPEAKER_00]: This is episode probably sixty five for something.
[SPEAKER_00]: And it's fifty two weeks in a year.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I drop a episode every one a week.
[SPEAKER_00]: So I'm well.
[SPEAKER_00]: We're in swing in our mid to upper sixties now.
[SPEAKER_00]: and I still got a lot of work to do.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not as bad as I was when I first started, but I'm deaf and nowhere and you're good.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm nowhere and you're great, right?
[SPEAKER_00]: There are things that I've got to work out.
[SPEAKER_00]: I must work out.
[SPEAKER_00]: I can do better work on my study habits, the content type.
[SPEAKER_00]: I can do all kinds of things and I'm working on those things.
[SPEAKER_00]: This is an episode I straight bombed out.
[SPEAKER_00]: Some episodes got zero views, some episodes got four thousand views.
[SPEAKER_00]: Some episodes got twelve views, some, some got two thousand views.
[SPEAKER_00]: No matter what, I ain't throwing it in a towel.
[SPEAKER_00]: No matter what gross what, don't you throw in the towel, get back after it, reflect, analyze and take action.
[SPEAKER_00]: Share this episode with somebody that you know is struggling with failure.
[SPEAKER_00]: Somebody you know that sit on the couch that's soaking because of a lost day took.
[SPEAKER_00]: Share this episode with them.
[SPEAKER_00]: Do them a favor.
[SPEAKER_00]: and let them know that failure is not final.
[SPEAKER_00]: Keep going, keep growing, and keep blowing grow squad, and I'll see you next time.
[SPEAKER_00]: Until then, take care.
[SPEAKER_00]: Peace.