It's 5:20 Somewhere - Barbee Sits Down With Jennifer Magley

Welcome back to it is five twenty somewhere. I am
your girl, Barbie, and tonight is going to be chaotic
because guess what, we have been flagged again, guys.
So introducing to.
My left with her big old fat booty, I'm introducing
the Diddler.
How you feeling tonight, freaky girl, m m just peachy.
I'm just playing. Y'all know, we got trapped in the building.
She's and I'm actually we know, I do have a
I'm upset because you know what, whatever, We'll go ahead.
No started off, We're gonna getki.
I am disturbed because y'all, Molk cracked a girl in
my spot on the couch and.
So we didn't get to talk about the incident. But
I feel like this is revenge. I feel like this
is revenge. I wish we could pan the camera to
his Oh is that.
Camera, oh, Mike? Oh camera yeah? Period yeah cool? Yeah,
so not very happy? Is this camera on? Oh? Being
that camera on our freaky ass producer? Motion?
Molk, you got some motion, all right, motion in the
ocean on the.
He said it is a cloud all right? Into my right.
I got the beautiful, the pretty but strong Kiki.
Hey, oh my gosh what they said. So you you
remember you were like you do yourself as a drink, right.
Somebody said, uh, well, somebody said Kiki is definitely to
a double shot of hennes Seed. And then somebody else
said she's a what's that coffee drink? The coffee martin
espresso martini. That was like, because she's pretty strong and energetic.
I'm just like, that is so funny.
I'm on express Martine. But what are we talking about? Drinks?
Let's go ahead and cheers it up. Yeah, this is
gonna be a late Mother's Day episode, but we love
y'all either way, and so tonight we are drinking. I
need y'all to name this. I didn't name it. What
are y'as saying?
So it has Maxwell Park tequila, we have elder flower liquor.
We have guava nectar and lawn juice mm hmm. But
so it's given like that floral. It's gotta giving y'all
y'all flowers.
Yeah, mother something in it to be like I don't know,
Mama Me.
Or some Mama Mia off so big Mario like Mamma Mia.
But this is the the bouquet that the mothers want.
What a little bit of Maxwell tequila in there.
How y'all like it? It's pretty smooth y Yeah, I
like you cute chaste to it. Trop you're looking so good.
I'm ready to get into fit check before we get
started cumbles.
Do they all have thumb holes? Yeah, they have thumb holes.
We need some gsts please. And this is so cute, y'all.
My daughter got me this for Mother's Day. That's so sweet.
She knows what you like.
She got money like her mama. Okay, period, get into it.
And I just think it's so perfect that it's cherries fire.
Where's the oh? Yup? Yup?
You?
I think yup? Period? Just you you good. I'm in
my goat yard.
You go girl saying all this ga stuff to my
house so that her mom couldn't see it.
I'm just like, dang, okay.
I'll let you usher me crazy.
I'll let you usher me.
It's just a little that wasn't a pause moment.
Oh okay, I'm just it's directed to old girls. Okay, okay,
if it's playing a guy and a girl, no, why
don't he let me put my cherries in his mouth?
Both of both pauls.
Paul the guy said that they did. They hit me
with a pause because they said, I'm one of the guys.
Bro grow okay, soul tree, Yes, going.
Like because speak of speaking of Mother's Day.
Happy Mother's Day to all the beautiful women in the
World's day for the tenth time today, the black woman.
Created the world. We created it all. So Happy Mother's
Day to every black woman, whether you have a child
or not. Girl. That so that's what I was going for,
you know, being.
In hate the sultry as bitches. But listen, I'm gonna
give it to him.
Period. I am not my hair, I am not I
am not okay whatever and words on the rocks. I
hope I say it right. Go to it. Matricence, it's mattress.
I think it's maresce matressence.
Matressence the physical, emotional, hormonal, and identity transition a woman
experiences when becoming a mother, like adolescence, but for motherhood
that's real.
Too, So use it in a sentence. Motherhood isn't just
raising a child.
It's I can't say the word matressence a whole come
on tele prompter, new version of yourself is born.
You know, I thought it was really like comf do.
Know I could really say to the word Words on
the Rocks is very scripted. This show ain't scripted at all.
But Words on the Rocks is very very scripted.
But sometimes we can't read the script. You can't read
or pronounce it, forget our lines.
The thing is, I don't know if I blame the molly.
I blame the molly from college. I have a hole
in my brain.
So when it comes to certain stuff, Baby, it just bevy.
I don't. I don't. I don't agree with that. You're
so smart, you're pretty witty, or pretty quick on your feet.
I don't think you got no holes in y'r mind.
I got holes in my brains, my brains.
You might you might have got you might have one
little off And words from the block?
Who's taking that? So words from block?
Okay, as y'all know, none of these grandmas these days
want to be called grandma. Also, even back in the day,
people got different variations of grandma. You might have called
your granny something else. So words from the block? What
do y'all feel like? Are some alternative is to the
word grandma? There's so many, there's so many.
Well, I call my granny, I call her granny. Then
I had a grandma.
I think the countriest thing ever is when you say,
like like my grandma is my grandma sissy. Oh, but
I think it's I think it's so country when people
be like my auntie Sharon or you know this this
is and that, like when you put a name on it,
like most people just be like my aunty, my grandma.
We be putting names to it sometimes because when you
got multiple aunties, it's like you got to.
But yeah, my granny, my grandma. But my son has
a sweetpea.
You know these young grandma's, don't they are fighting them
grandma landma?
They right, grandma? What else.
Are One of our nieces caused their grandma nana my mama.
My kids called mom. They they granny on their daddy's side,
Mama Pool. That's cute because that's her name, but she
just put a mama in front of it. All of
her grandkids call her. My kids called their dad's mom grandest, grandest.
Oh what does that mean? Like the grand grandest of them?
Yeah. The thing is, I've heard y'all say that, but
I always thought it was grandest like g A R
I mean g R A N D I s I
never it never was.
Grandest t one.
I think it's so cute. I'm like, okay, girl. One
of the kids mom's like they got mad at her, like,
who do you think you are calling yourself grand having
my kids call you grandest? Like I said, she needs
to get smacked, bitch.
What are you worried about? What this old lady got her?
Her grandkids calling her she's older though she's not.
I'm older, she's in her six Oh yes, I've had
somebody ask me, uh like, how I feel about before
I had my daughter, how I feel about her about
the car her granny mama pool because it's Mama in
front of it.
But I'm her mom. I'm like, who cares? They know?
All the other her other grandkids call her that, and
she's a fire as grannie too.
So my son would prefer that my mom was his mom.
Like he cried the other day and was like, she's.
She's your mom, She's not my mom.
I'm like, bro, girdthrow fuck out my room's like, but
that just makes me think about like y'all, well, y'all
admit y'all mom X and I'll start first if y'all
want me to go ahead, mom ick number one, when
you try to be a good mom and either take
them somewhere or buy them something to make them happy
and to get out of your face, talk about it,
and it turns into a whole term oil. Like I
got my son in this little remote control car. He
kept crashing it into the wall. Then he was throwing
the tantrum. I'm like, I shouldn't even have bought the ship.
Or he like, or you'll take.
Him somewhere and they're like, oh my feet hurt, I don't.
Want to walk like bro, I'm literally taking you to
this thing for you to fucking have fun.
Please leave me alone.
Or how about when you take them somewhere, y'all spend
a whole day somewhere.
You donea spend the.
Bank, y'all get in a car and the kids be like,
I'm bored. It's doing like I'm like, bro.
We could have sat at the house for free, exactly.
They're never satisfied. They me complaining and you spending all
your coins. Bro. My kids just always asking for shit constantly,
every more and more and more and more and more.
Today I'm like, y'all should y'all should not ask me
for anything cause it's Mother's Day today. Y'all should just
give me one day of not asking for like something
at the store or roll looks or something like that.
And then my daughter goes.
But you said if we play good today that you
would get us a dumpling, And I'm like, like, bitch,
you don't get no break.
No breaks, no breaks at all.
And now I understand when our moms was younger, like
when we were younger, and our moms like, I just
want peace for Mother's Day.
I just want peace for Mother's Day.
Oh honey, I made my daughter help me clean today,
like that's what she got me a gift. But I'm
also like, so the other half of my gift is
we're gonna clean, yes, which.
I don't like. I don't like that.
Kids will like see something on the floor like a
piece of trash or something, walk past it, like pick
that shit up? Why are you going to wait on
me to do it?
Motherhood is shatto. Don't get them.
It is absolutely ghetto. But happy Mother's Day to everyone period.
We love those those sweet little people.
We love our kids.
But guess what happened chaotic to me this week? What
he wanted to hang with a babbage and he wanted
to thing.
I ain't got no cuddy, hell no, Oh. I hung
out with a man that was thirty years older than me.
Whoa thirty okay thirty?
When I said I want on fifty next, then that's
what I meant. And I found one. We had a
grand old time. Look at Max's face.
Yeah wat y'all yn, Yeah, yeah, we had a good
old time.
And he said, I love your show.
You and the twins, y'all look so good on and
y'all are so funny, he said, And I wanted to
talk to y'all about the Ogs versus the y Ns.
I said, talk to me, Pop Pop, You're no good.
He said, I got five things for you. I said, okay,
what is it? He said?
First off, the OG's is better than the y ns
because we don't live life and we know who we are,
while these young niggas still trying to find theyselves.
I said, what do that mean to me? You could
still you could find yourself and still be non ship.
Okay, I'm say your second thing, he said, And I
know exactly what I want, So I'm going to tell
you the truth where these young niggas gonna lie to you.
M okay, third one my favorite one.
You don't have to prove to me why you deserve
to be have money spent on you.
Where these whyns. They want to know what you bring
to the table.
They want you to jump through hoops to get a
little cash, he said.
He said, ain't no problem. He just want to have fun.
His days is limited around his month. I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
What was number four? That was three women? Number don't die?
That's off a movie.
I can't remember what number four it was, but the
last one he was like, damn, how what did he say?
Number four? It was?
I will agree though, like to they to the extent
a little bit. I ain't gonna lie. If you ain't
coming up off of h you're not getting nothing spent
on you.
For coming up off of what drop?
Oh sorry, some couchie let me drop some lemon drop.
A dinner is crazy? But how okay? So how do
you get to you got to court the home or
that's what it was. That's what number four was.
They know how to treat a woman like they were
courting back in the day. Like he's pulling our chairs
and open up doors. If he's if there's nowhere to sit.
He's gonna stand up, like they know how to treat
a woman. And then he said number five, them ojesus,
some freaks.
He said, I don't know what y'all what y'all have heard?
Well, he said, long as they good and they can,
they can, you know, in the shit wear plaid boxers
though for sure, Hey, no, my daddy, were.
You think they wear?
Old niggas is wearing tidy?
My daddy said, I ain't wearing them tight. Well, this
is when he had first got out. He was like,
I ain't wearing them tight ass briefs, nuts hanging to
your sticking to your legs. So he only wear them
big ass Hanes draws, and my daddy was wearing like
a two X like when he got out, he still
thought the big stuff was like it took him years
to start wearing like straight legs and stuff. But he
there them old man be having all them babies. That's
that's good for your sperm count.
Them briefs is bad for a sperm count.
That older man he was, he's nice looking and he
was real clean cut. I'm sure he had on some
nice Calvin Klein nautical briefs oh cool, but he was.
He was a really nice old man. But thirty years
my senior is crazy. I don't know what to feed them.
Mm hmm, you'll find something.
Thirty years thirty years, y'allmans so livings. Oh, my friend
said he's gonna try to eat your booty. Oh Dan,
I don't know the filterday.
I told you, I don't want nothing to do with nothing.
The older guys they do are like super courteous, super sweet.
They're gonna open the doors. They do, open all the doors.
They jacket if they if you're riding with them, they
be like, you're hungry, you need something, constantly asking you
do you need something? He was like, don't take advantage
of me in the world. What you want to listen to?
Accommodating somebody like that? But he our age.
She in his thirties, and I was like, he's very
Was he from the South, Yes, yeah, some southern men. Yeah,
that's when the Midwest edimless himself in sist.
Oh lord, what's your answers? Rey Milk, You will tell
y'all know.
A little Dominican Africa?
What part of Africa? I don't know you're from Africa.
I'm from Crenshaw Mafia. I ain't from Africa. I'm from
Crenshaw Mafia. I would like to say that my back
is feeling a lot better this week. I have low
key been on bed rest all week, but I feel
a little better. I still kind of feel like like,
I don't know how to explain it. I feel like
how Adrian Browner looks. That's how I feel. Crunchy stuff
like you just like type ship. But I don't know
the way his like back touches the back of his head,
that's how I like.
The way you're doing is making me think of shamar.
It's close and getting too far into it, a real
big three. We'll be at five day. We will be
at five twenty days, so make sure you are there.
Make sure you are shopping Club five twenty dot com
for all of your gear. Concert tickets are on there.
The field day is free, so pull up.
Mike just dropped on us, dropped on us today that
the field day is not kid friendly because he has
been advertising it as kid friendly.
Like little kid friendly or like kid that's true. I
mean I'm not bringing my my oldest daughter. She's something dope,
be able to making decrees. It's not on my pain.
We're gonna have so much fun. I'll help you. Oh yay, Yeah,
we're gonna turn up. We're going to turn up. I'm
going to be the drunk cheerleader. Give me a woop
woo drunk. You're getting drunk that early? How early is
a eleven am two? It's going all day, y'all. That's something
Barbie pays yourself a little drinking. I'm not drinking. I
ain't fucking with y'all. Man. The last time I got
sucked up with y'all, it was just too much. The
last time was the last time, y'all. That last time, no, sir.
That night was just wait which night girl? One? We
shall forget one, we shall forget.
Please.
I never want to talk about it. The kid never.
I don't know, oh never never, broday, we all fucked up.
I'm always fucked up.
It was when we signed oh that night, okay, because
I was just fucked up with messing with Barbie last
weekend to blame out my body guys, I don't even
Oh yeah, she called me.
I'm like these drunk ass host What the fuck was
I at? Your kids? Grow me such a good sport.
Though, I will say that she's she will stay on
the phone with you. She will stay on FaceTime with you,
and you I will go live. She will try to
call my phone.
She will like stay Now. Oh we didn't even get
to talk about that, y'all. So where did you called
her the diddler? Oh well, we didn't talk. We didn't
go into detail.
So our first very first episode on YouTube flagged. Now
we're flagged on Instagram and all four of our pages
are under restriction.
All our personal pages and the five twenty somewhere page.
We can't DM, we can't go live, we can't do anything.
I can't monetize my page and make money off for
reels for ninety days.
We can't even like a story like they are being
real strict.
And the thing is, we sorry them, We sorry, we
were gonna.
I don't know what to do.
So the thing is because we made that real about
the whole pagan thing.
And I said, I was like, you're to.
Yeah ye, And basically I think it sounded a little bit.
It sounded like in her champagne. She ain't even know it.
I took it home and enjoyed it. I don't even
know what. Yeah. So but y'all. I was really just joke.
That was a joke. I really didn't a nigga. It
was a joke.
I mean I did do that, but like how Barbie
was like, he felt you slide in that hand, He
did feel it, and I ain't just gonna give it
to him dry like that.
You gotta getting back first. You No, No, that's not
what I meant. But anyways, it was a joke. I
just said iron them just for theatrics, and I didn't
he knew it was coming.
And then when he said he didn't like it, it
was like some hindsight. We was laughing about it the
next day and he was like, yeah, don't ever do
that ship again.
So it never did. And so but yeah, I didn't
just you. I didn't yeout your guy. I think you
forgot one more line what Mike told.
You to say.
What the PR team is working.
It's okay, we don't kink, shame nobody, right, but we're gonna.
Keep it, keep it real cute on the internet. Okay,
I don't got a booty hooking.
You don't got no. I was it was just random.
Our last episode was called the booty episode. All Right,
we're looking at mout face with the booty bedness, said
certified boy was hard talking about. But y'all, I I
feel like Johnson, I like booty. I don't like booties.
Have you all been coming on with new lingo?
All we have is lemon drop, thunderclap, biscuity? What can
a biscuit be? Yeah? What's up, lady?
Dinner?
I don't like neck dinner. It's very like I like
tornado throat.
I like that tornado.
I don't like I don't like neck dinner, but to tornado. Okay, girl,
see you.
Orlando Brown or.
Putting down? All right? I did it? No, I did now,
no young gum.
Somebody ever bit y'all was getting hit everyone man trying
to clean up the show. Malcolm, I didn't even say
the word he is he is, he's freaking out for show.
But were on the top, on the top. I had
a little tweet definitely, y'all.
Have y'all ever had like, y'all's what are we calling
the word miss pearley? Have y'all ever had miss pearly?
Slip in between somebody's gap? It's painful sound.
It wasn't that. Hell no, not not the whole thing.
But just like, you know, just let some of your
skin down there or whatever, just like slip through.
It wasn't even a crazy gap.
No, but I was like, oh, I know part of
my anatomy did not just go this man's teeth.
It was so painful. Do you have good thunder throat experiences?
Because if you having some stories? Okay, yes, I do,
not that one. I don't like I don't like nick dinner.
We need something. Grilly could just say boring, it'll cokay. No,
I just let it slide and it didn't happen. No, No,
have you ever had like pain during what anything to
have whatever? Kind of like overlooked.
It and it didn't happen again, thank goodness.
But after something traumatic like that, you kind of want
him to soothe it, so like, go ahead and no,
I don't say anything. Mm hmm. No stories from Kiki, right.
I just hate people that lick hard. That's I hate that.
We're gonna do a Patreon exclusive.
We'll give a class on how to lick the missus
Parley and I'm just kidding.
Focus today, guys, guess what we are doing.
We're at the studio until twelve am, and guess what
Mike didn't tell us about it until yesterday, less than
twenty four hours. So I just said the day before
Mother's Day. And I'm just imagining, like if I had
a man at home and I would have to be like,
you know, Tamarson, that dude, dude, that's so not the beat.
You know, the Taymar song I'm talking about, Just be
a man, but you know how to come on and
he on the phone, that's not that's her sister.
Oh it's Tony Brexton, Tony Brexton, Tony Brexton. But I'm
just imagining it having to be like, yeah, babe, don't
wait up. I'm gonna be at the studio. Yeah, I know,
I know, I know you really want to check out
that spy. But he's gonna go to he gonna he
gonna understand. Can you make He's gonna be like It's like,
I'm just trying to make a way for both of us,
you know, so we can take that trip you wanted
to take.
Oh hell no, yeah, so sounding like Alicia Keys to Michael,
we can meet him right here across the park, right here.
He was sounding so like nigger ish, noigs, just crazy.
But yeah, I'm gonna be like I left that thirty
on the on the dresser for you go get your
hair cut.
I see you in the morning thirty. But yeah, so
I don't know. This is what we're going through here,
and we.
Can't sustain a relationship at this point because it ain't
nobody going for that?
Are you going for that? Milk at the studio till
twelve twelve? Ain't that bad?
It was crazy job.
Be up here more than us be just think love
and the study, the couch. Literally, do it? Do it?
You missed? You are just not at all story about
how he didn't cracked a woman? Hitty. I don't want
to hit nothing computer, that's why.
Really do it?
What was that you made me think about the computer?
I was the wrong y'all want me to try?
No, unt make it, No, I'll make it. I just
don't want to hurt any expensive.
Yeah, so that's all I was thinking about. I'm already
in the whole, y'all. I can't break name. We in
the hole. That's why we're here at twelve o'clock with
no with no talk back. Oh it's mother day. Who
cares on the blade? I mean from the stro five
two os? No, No, who's doing that. They delete that.
I'm glad they I'm glad they can't hear any When.
Y'all pick up y'all kids from your baby daddy house,
do y'all take Are you opposed to having a man
in the car with you?
Yes, you're trying to get us.
No, I'm just asking, like, if it's my boyfriend, and
like established boyfriend, it shouldn't be a problem.
I don't. I don't see that that happening though. That
would be.
When they pick up your kid from your house. Dude,
are they allowed to have a girl in a car.
The thing is, I would not from my house. I
don't want nobody to know where I live. That would
be excessive. But like if we were meeting up somewhere
and the girl was in the car, because I've been
in the car with someone picking up their kids, so.
Mm hmm, yeah, meet up, It's cool.
I feel like my baby dad had his girl in
the car when he and I felt like he should
have asked me before he pulled up.
At your house.
Yes, and you know how you are about your I'm
so extra about my house. Yes, I'm overly extra, And
I just feel like you could have asked, like.
I've been with a guy for years and will literally
I've dropped the guy off because we were together. I've
dropped him off like at his place, went to go
pick up my kids and then went back and got
my nigga, just.
Because I feel like it's disrespectful to especially but even
that to me, don't pull up with no bitch in
a car. But also like because it's no, he's not,
we not doing that. He gonna love me to the
day he died. He don't he know not to do
no ship like that?
Oh mind satan, But we can move on.
Hello, how long a y'all waiting to introduce some man
y'all baby daddy.
I don't have to. That never needs to take place.
For what I know you don't like so.
And he he I mean you my kids then I
don't know them and I don't need to way. All
I have to trust is your judgment as a co parent.
That's try to meet her for real.
Ideally though, like if I do take somebody serious, I
would like to do that.
But in the way we set up.
Men are This is the thing. Men are very immature.
They're not as mature as us. Like us, we can
you know, meet the baby the I mean the other girl,
the girl. We can, you know, talk to them, do
pick ups. I can, I can exchange my my with
with the girlfriend.
You don't even gotta be there.
You can come to the parties like when you are
a boyfriend you Danner can't even invite your baby dad
to the party or vice versa. Like men are soull,
territorial and immature, like can y'all get with the program?
Like how we be doing?
And I think it's some men that I don't think
that all men are like that, because I see it
a lot like or the men are actually being the
more mature one with some females, cause like some females
be catty with it, like trying to like push the
boyfriend to like make the baby daddy jellish and stuff
like that.
So I see a lot of men that put them
you know. But it's a sticky subject.
But like Trump said, just I trust your judgment to
not have anybody that to do anything inappropriate or harmful
to my child.
So and it's just.
Like, bro, who are you? Like the world don't revolve
around you. I'm not reaching out to your girlfriend like
y'all do. Y'all, and we gonna do us like I
might collab with like my man's baby mama if that's
what he wants us to do. But that's me catering
to him, Like I'm not catering to my baby daddy,
Like who are you lost?
I'm not reaching out to your girlfriend.
Prioritized baby Daddy's that ship water under the bridge.
That's just my son made me feel so special today, y'all.
And the thing is like he really stood on business
about me, Like he made sure to get me a
gift and he picked it out and he was just
he was not playing, like come pick me up.
I got to give my mommy a gift.
And I was just like he's so young and just
so thoughtful, like he is the sweetest special today.
Yeah, he tried to help me cook back for herself. I
was like, please get the fun out.
The way like that when your kids want to help cook.
Be like to be so patient, literally, like patience is then.
But like speaking of cooking, what is something nasty that
your mom made when you.
Were a kid. Everything? My mom cannot cook.
She can't cook. No, she's better now, she's better now
than when we were kids.
But y'all to cook? How to cook? Y'all? Me?
Mom My daddy can't cook. Definitely could cook what you
get around the kitchen.
Mam mad mom cute yeah man mom yr daddy's side. Okay, yep, yeah.
She but she would make like some mooning food. She
could do that or whatever. But she can make some rice.
So do y'all make y'all making min and rice or
y'all making real rice? Real rice? Am I less of
a woman because I make miny rice? No? I feel
like just like we grew up like that, Like we
we make rice with every meal.
I love min of rice, spaghetti, nothing. We making the
mint rice in the red box like the little or
in the both.
I used the plastic and I use the red one
because I'm like it's good.
Yeah, don't get the rice in that red box is
good and it says min and rice, But to me,
I feel like it cooked the same.
It's really good when you with sugar and butter.
When you cook real rice, you have to like really
rinsing and all that stuff, And how long does it take?
Like why do people act like it tastes like second nature?
To me?
I can whip up some rice like it is nothing. Yeah,
what's y'all go to the cook for a man? You
got a sneak in some mac and cheese somewhere. Okay,
he's not like la.
Disabilities when it comes to eating niggas.
It's so many who's like, I don't eat mac, I
don't need pasta, I don't need this.
I have a man. Tell me he don't eat seafood.
That was just so I hate. Yes, he was allergic.
I'm like, but.
You still dabbles tech, yeah, maybe still eat it. Yeah,
because they said to go to to keep a man
as a pot roast?
Oh? Is it like that?
They act like that's like such a grown thing to make.
I mean you literally just throw all that in yours dinner.
Like the steps heritage you push stuff? Are y'all specific specific?
Islander specific? Okay, you se y'all month happy look at
us Islander Heritage month? Asian?
I mean they do that, you know they be doing
that on the little ice step test.
Asian and Pacific Islander.
What y'all call y'all some some grandma grand her name,
what's what's the word what's the word for grandma? And
y'all language, You basically call them Mom. You that's mom.
That's cute.
Come on, you supposed to be and you don't even
know they do.
Listen, it's.
Month, it's it's also Mother's Day, and it's also nurses.
We and oh that's what was on my car happy
nurses weak to try And.
This is what I wanted to say because I was
so nervous because they got this new virus. Put us first,
Queen Micha will up the score.
Put us first. Don't leave us, don't go to l
A for no shortage. We need you here, Michael, because
she tries to leave us. Y'all don't understand when COVID
was going on. They was paying tangis a week.
I know they was. I know they was. We just
about to be spread out on the couch. I'm gonna
come from the week, y'all. Ain't fucking with it, she said.
When I see that, you see we want to be
and she locked in already.
What's it called? What's the virus? Okay, all right, we're
not talking. We're not like trickles down slow like in
the hospitals. We're not talking about that ship.
Y'all.
It's all over the media because why would they let
them people off at work.
Or any media I've seen. I said, y'all, trap gonna
leave us. We're gonna be sure.
I ain't gonna just replace her with one of your
other ship. I don't know the name. That's some scurry
ship right here.
It's a potentially deadly I bought a new hand sanitizer
and everything.
Look at her. Meanwhile, even know the name of it.
We need you. She's going. She's gonna be on the
first thing. California ain't seen it, and we ain't.
I mean, it's just we It just comes up in
conversation like gossip, just like how we wanna talk about
it until we see it or yeah, so we have
another samo and sister on the couch. We're just gonna
keep calling her trop while she's going gone to California.
To fight the virus. So what's show me to impress
a guy? Not a damn thing.
Uh, it's always like steak. I'm gonna I'm gonna go
stak crazy.
You be salmon for me.
Oh my gosh, they're gonna talk about your top, Fred
But I don't even eat salmon anymore.
So now I was like, whatever, whatever is clever.
I've seen a girl there making a tomahawk for men,
And I say, and if I make a damn tomahawk,
I want to ring.
This because not for real?
If I if I, if I make a tomahawk, nigga
wife meet cuff meat immediately speaking of wife, have y'all
ever dealt with a mom in law? I mean, none
of us are Mary, but you know what I mean
A mom in law, a mom, a mom zilla, a mom.
Ster in law. Yeah, a mom ster in law.
Mm hmm, somewhat I dealt with like an extreme mama's boy.
But the mom was real cool though, yeah, until she wasn't.
But it was just like, was she not during y'all's
relationship or she was? She was super cool? Uh, it
was just a little look.
Look.
The thing was, see, they gonna end up writing for
They could like you, they could love you, whatever, but
they gonna end up writing for their son when stuff
hit the fan, and it's just like, you know, you
know that she's a girl, right, Yeah, so, but you
said you dealt with that before, not not like that,
But I've dealt with like sisters not liking me, moms
not really like like stuff like that.
I ain't gonna lie I have my mom slapp one of.
My what what the girl hits you?
Yeah? She pulled up. I had cheated on her whatever
she put up on me, and we was talking out side.
But she was like, I'm about to go tell your
mama this, this and that, and d like, yeah, you're tweaking.
You don't know my mama.
When niggas hate when you call their mom.
She walked in the crib, she yelled my mama name.
She like, I'm like, my mama, came off that corner
she did them jumped from the top flight all the
way to the bottom. It was arguing. She's like, you
got me fun. She was like, you made a bitch,
made ass son.
She deserves to get slep.
I was about to walk up to her. I'm like, yo,
you bugging ma. Mama helped me back and she smacked
her ass and get.
On my well deserved because girl, if you got.
A problem, call your mama and tell her bring her
ass up here. She get her ass beat to her.
Period kail period.
I see, yeah, that's my nigg.
You called CPS owner.
Yeah, niggas'd be like that.
No, that was not right. What's the what's some mom
sayings that went platinum in your house? Milk?
What your mama used to say to Yeah, what she
used to say, like I brought you in this world,
but I take you out.
What she used to say to you.
My mama just she just talked ship. She wouldn't say
no sin, talking ship all day.
Y'all ain't clean up, ya ain't take the meat out
what y'all.
Was doing, clean up, take the trash out the fun.
Y'all want to be homeless? Okay, y'all want to live
like some homeless people. That's all she would do is
talk shit.
What about for y'all?
My mama used to say, never bite the hand that
feeds you.
Never bite the hands that you have to feed us.
She also used to say, do y'all know what a
fib is?
A key fob? No like a five? Do you know
what it stands for? It means fresh off the boat.
So like if you get dressed or whatever, or if
she feel like you look crazy or you don't look presentable,
be like you look like a five.
She used to say that all the time. Here be saying,
may be at Burlington.
She used to say that, and she was the same,
like whenever I had like an issue, or you come
to her like and you can like vent to her,
complaining to her about something.
She used to be like, baby, they just jealous. They're
just jealous.
That's my mama's favorite. Everybody was jealous of me. I
gonna believe that to the day I die.
They just my daughter say that I am my daughter.
Gonna always tell me everybody that my daughter gonna.
Mama's thay, I'm not one of your little friends. To
this day, she is my little friend type.
She is my little friend.
My mama stays saying, respect that mother and that father
and now shall have ever lasting Like okay, So she
just used that ship against us all the time, like
bro quick weaponizing a bible.
Bro.
And she was good for like if you ask her
for some or if you ask her to go somewhere
and then she don't really give you no answer for
real and then like fast forward like a day or something.
Then then you do some shit that pissed her off. She's
gonna be like and I was gonna let you go, yes.
Off, let me go anyway you was waiting on me
With them older mamas used to say, wow, oh he
was his way he and.
Hear no mama sent me off the boot camp.
Because you was bad or bad. I'm a little bus
I've been drinking too much today.
Papaul he had like a strict program I have. It's
like middle school. On to school at a thirty. The
nigga will wake me up at six in the morning.
Do homework before school. What I swear to God, I'm
doing homework. Last night I did. I was studying, doing
homework period, no game, no phone. Nigga had a warm
clock right by my bed. It come in. He was
so petty. He'll drive me to school. You know, I'm
a kiss. I'm tired. Sleep on the window. This niggas
rolls down the window the whole car.
Oh, that's a good one. I'm gonna use that. That's
my cold. I'm gonna use that for shows.
I just thought about a random snack my mama used
to used to give us. Did y'all used to eat
the little chicken and biscuits with the little spray cheese.
Yeah, what other kind of like ghetto snacks? Did y'all?
Is that ghettle?
I need to sausag juice with some hot sauce. Also,
our greeny used to give us all the time for lunch.
She used to always give us crackers with balognea and cheese,
and I ain't gonna lie. It tasted like mad.
It was good. I study to this day if I
didn't know what was in bologna? Do y'all eat tuna? Mhm? Sardines?
Right?
Y'all know that canned.
Oysters, hoghead cheese. I've heard of it, the ball No, a.
Whole bunch of stuff stuff together. It's almost like because
it used to be a deli down the street from us.
I don't feel like I've had that, though. It tastes
a little bit.
It looks spammy eat spam. No, No, I'm gonna say
I was in the trenches for real stamon eggs.
What about oatmealk cookies? Yeah? Did y'all used to have
to let them get still? I never ate that. Do
you ate this?
Nothing?
You from Gary? Ain't you?
Yeah?
Okay? Yeah? It's giving Malcolm.
What about what's a weird food combination that y'all like? Mmm?
I don't think I got none. Y'all got nothing? Y'all
know what I like? I like lace potato chips with
hot sauce and shirty cheese.
Laced potato chips and hot sauce is absolutely fire. Did
y'all do ships and dip like the French onion? Yeah,
Deans French onion, that's what it was. That was fire mount.
Are you young enough? Did y'all do like the pickles
in the kool aid?
Yeah?
We did? Y'all did that?
Did y'all?
I all like that ship a little sweet little I
don't like that.
I had to like little pepper with a hot cheeto
like some cream cheese.
I want to try that, they said with cucumbers or something.
We're gonna try that next.
Oh, did y'all put Okay, Derek, you put water salt
on your watermelon?
You do that?
Salt and watermelon is crazy? Oh my gosh, that's old
school for real, My Green.
You got any combinations? Milk? Mike?
Pretty clean cut? Just hot dogs. I'm tired of looking
at him with this thing in his mouth.
Yeah.
The wood, the woods.
Take it out falls, hot Tabasco and oreos.
Discuss a bit much. That's absolutely disgusting.
Oh, while it's Mother's day, y'all. Okay, y'all know what's
saying that? I fucking hate. That's really like normalized.
Fuck them kids. Oh I lie hate it, fuck them kids,
drop what. I hate it. I can't stand it. I
think that we just take it too literal, like fuck
them kids.
It sounds so nasty. I just no, not even nasty.
It's just like I just I just don't like it.
It just rubs me the wrong way. Of course, I'm
socialized to be like, okay, cool whatever, they're just joking.
But like, I never used that phrase. I just don't
like it.
Oh, I use it all the time. I get I
get it, but it's just like kids are annoying. I
feel like moms need to say fuck them kids sometimes.
I just don't think we should ever say that. I
don't think we should normalized. I know it's a joke,
but I just don't. I feel you, and you know,
I'm very much like attached to my long time and
you know, my baby daddy doing his thing or whatever.
But I it's not it's not my cup of teeth,
that's same. It's just my personal preference. I just I
don't use the phrase. I've always hated it. I don't
like the way it rolls off the tongue. Oh, I
be loving to fuck them kids, fuck get them out
my house. I need a break, I need to breathe.
I need some space. Bro, I didn't have somebody safe.
And if you want to say fuck them kids referring
to your kids, go for it.
But when the motherfucker when I'm like, oh no, I
can't cuz I don't have I gotta work, Oh no,
I gotta take the kids to.
They game or and the motherfucker be like, fuck them kids,
true kids.
Yeah, y'all.
I was out of town one time and I was
with I ended up linking with this guy from the
city or whatever, and we was like out drunk, like anyway.
The next day, I missed my damn flight messing with him,
and I'm just like, but I didn't know I was.
I was late, and I'm on my way to the
airport and I'm like, I'm gonna be so depressed if
I miss this flight. I'm like, I'm ready to get home.
I'm ready to get home to my kids. He gonna
say something, fuck them kids, y'all. When I say I
did not talk to him for months, I wouldn't because
I know that it's a normal saying. But it's like, literally,
like no, the fuck, don't you see I'm over here,
depressed even who is to see them? And it's already
like offensive when men don't understand, like and.
He's a great kid, he's a great dad.
But I under it's a very normalized phrase. But I'm
just like, especially in that moment, I'm like, I mean,
even minus the phrase, when they're not considered of your
time with your kids, like just like, for instance.
Oh what you off work on Friday?
Yeah, I am off work, but that doesn't mean I'm available.
I'm still a mom, Like your time don't come before
my kids time, no period, Stay another day, nigga.
No. The next thing smoking, who did you talking.
About always putting them kids first when y'all first became
moms though any unwarranted advice that used.
To get on mm hmm probably that was such a
long time.
Yeah, cause I don't know if y'all have seen like
on social media, but Scottie off of Baddies, y'all know,
she just had her first kid with Lemmy, the owner
of Zeus and everything, and she is getting so tired
of people telling her like how to take care of
her kid, like what to do. But I feel like
people have that, especially like people have that so bad.
Always trying to coach you and tell you what to
do when you're a new mom, and.
It's just like chill, bruh, I got.
This, Yeah, And it's so instinctual, like you know what
the hell to do?
Yeah?
If if animals know what to do, we're whole humans,
why would we not know what to do? But I
will say they didn't have that baby in the airport,
no blanket on, nothing, just.
Like nothing more than a baby not having a blanket
on or had in some side.
What y'all like, y'all got the baby roll dog in there.
But I understand though as well her and let me
oh but fuck them kids.
By twenty day, make sure y'all got yall tickets, y'all
in the building, Field Day concert after party at Georgia Street.
Make sure y'all got y'all gears, shop Club five twenty
dot com. And to end us out, Kiki, you got
anything to say anything you want to tell the people?
Happy birth not happy birthday, happy retirement? PJ? Who's PJ
Washington today? Only you don't know today? Only the news? Nothing?
Tell me more? Who is that? You know? You know Packer?
He was on the show, ain't he saying? He was
gonna retire.
Okay, y'all got me feeling like I got my news
mixed up.
I'm trying to so PJ. Tucker, who used to play
for a lot of people. Oh, okay, and he's retiring.
He's a black man. Yes, he's like he's like a
friend that he liked. All right, shout out to p J.
Tucker and enjoy your retirement. Love. I know I've seen
him before.
Okay, Bucks, Houston, he played all the team, Jeff played
all let's see go back, Let's see where else she said,
Harlem Grove, Trup, the Rocket.
Oh that's I mean, that's Atlanta.
Oh yeah, no shirt, y'all know.
I know because when I seen the Bucks, my mind
went to Atlanta, and then I seen no Houston Rockets.
That's a basketball team. Yes, okay, so it was just
two different jerseys. That's that episode Los Angeles Jos.
Yikes, he desires to retire. Okay, mkay, he got area code.
Shout out. Shout out to my god, PJ. Make sure
he had clube five twenty days since he retired, Phoenix,
cause we out of here. Okay. Then, okay, bay Wo