Episode 7 - The Seventh Episode

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<v Charlie Incarica>This episode of the Murderer Killings is brought to you by Shady Grove High School.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Shady Grove isn't just the home of world-class pudding manufacturers.

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<v Charlie Incarica>It's also home to a state-of-the-art education facility.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Shady Grove High boasts a population of over 40 students, a full-size basketball hoop, classrooms fabricated from the country's largest array of converted shipping containers, and, due to budget cuts, a world-class a cappella group.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Come to Shady Grove High and enjoy up to four years of practical education.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Just take it from Jeff Fowler, who's not only the principal of Shady Grove High, he also attended ninth and part of tenth grade there.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Shady Grove High School for Children and Young Adults.

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<v Charlie Incarica>If you can make it here, please use the rear parking lot.

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<v Charlie Incarica>And while Taylor Branaghan's intuition was homing in on a prime suspect, she had trouble finding concrete evidence.

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<v Charlie Incarica>And she was under enormous pressure.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Local elections were less than two months away, and Carl Lyons was running for re-election on a two-plank platform, allowing free access to the two-story water slide in the New Town Hall every other Wednesday, and ousting Taylor Branigan as acting interim chief of police.

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<v Estelle Hayes>The only reason he hadn't already fired her was so he could promise to fire her after getting re-elected.

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<v Charlie Incarica>As summer turned to fall, I was hit with a severe case of imposter syndrome.

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<v Charlie Incarica>How could I possibly be suited to help solve this case?

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<v Charlie Incarica>However, I found research that shows imposter syndrome is something that almost exclusively afflicts successful people.

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<v Charlie Incarica>My doubts utterly extinguished, I returned to work.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Everything about the Shady Grove case felt so close to breaking.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Breaking in a good way.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Especially now that the bitter legal squabbling between the Putnam and Hart families had come to light.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Amanda had not written a will, telling her lawyers she refused to quote, cave in to defeatist thinking.

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<v Charlie Incarica>In such cases, state law decreed the assets of the deceased are bequeathed to the next of kin, Amanda's estranged and now widowed husband, William Hart.

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<v Charlie Incarica>This gave him the majority of shares in SGP.

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<v Charlie Incarica>However, the company's original bylaws stipulate that a direct member of the Putnam family must retain at least 51% of company ownership.

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<v Charlie Incarica>This put the Hart's and Putnams at loggerheads.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Teddy was caught on a hot mic saying that he'd, quote, stop at fucking nothing to keep the Hart's from getting his company.

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<v Charlie Incarica>William Hart's representatives issued a blistering statement saying he wouldn't stand for this behavior, and given his passion for sitting, it seemed like a promise he'd make good on.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Because of this hot mic incident, Teddy, on advice from Margaret Mandragara Jones, gave up his lifelong hobby of walking around town with a hot mic.

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<v Charlie Incarica>On September 18th, Margaret Mandragara Jones tweeted that she and Teddy Putnam had married.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Sensing what she was up to, D.A.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Teresa Nolo moved to invalidate the union based on the fact they were cousins.

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<v Charlie Incarica>But Ellen Newberry cited an 1887 law that not only allowed cousins in Shady Grove to marry, but offered generous tax incentives to those who did.

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<v Estelle Hayes>God, I know she's a vile human being, but I love to watch Margaret's mind at work.

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<v Estelle Hayes>That marriage was a master stroke.

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<v Estelle Hayes>It meant she and Teddy couldn't be forced to testify against one another.

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<v Estelle Hayes>It also potentially strengthened their case against William Hart because they were both direct descendants.

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<v Taylor Branigan>On the other hand, no one had any doubt that Margaret and Teddy were up to no good.

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<v Taylor Branigan>And Margaret didn't do herself any favors when the media became interested in the case again.

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<v Taylor Branigan>She and Teddy held a virtual press conference that backfired in a massive way.

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<v Margaret Mandragora-Jones>And that is why my husband and I feel Shady Grove pudding must remain in the hands of the Putnam family, which is us.

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<v Margaret Mandragora-Jones>We understand not only the high quality our customers have come to expect from our pudding, semiconductors, and animatronic theme part characters, but the importance of our company's unique connection to the warm, proud people of Shady Grove.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Okay, let's go with Kelly Mead from Canada.

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<v Reporter>Margaret, you've never been to Shady Grove until six months ago, and in that time you referred to Shady Grove on social media as a dark charade of a community bereft of any culture, hope, or indeed humanity.

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<v Reporter>A town which not only denies evolution, but has started to persuade me they may have a point and made Shady Grove as fuck what central a hashtag.

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<v Reporter>How can you claim you care about the town or its residents?

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<v Margaret Mandragora-Jones>I should think with the world facing such bleak and uncertain times, the media would stop deliberately taking things out of context to put a negative spin on everything.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Okay, one more question, Kelly.

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<v Reporter>You and Teddy were married only three days ago.

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<v Reporter>Why are you zooming from different locations?

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<v Teddy Putnam>Um Margaret has explained to me the sacred Australian wedding tradition of living separately for the first year of marriage, as it will make our first kiss on our first anniversary all the more meaningful.

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<v Margaret Mandragora-Jones>Exactly, love.

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<v Margaret Mandragora-Jones>Although, of course, we use the metric system in Australia, so one of our metric years equals two and a half American years.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Oh, right.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Okay, that's time, everybody.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Thank you so much.

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<v Estelle Hayes>Watching her try to convey warmth and sincerity was like watching a cat try to play Mozart, then deciding to shit on the keyboard instead.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Between public opinion and the showdown against William Hart, Taylor Branigan was in a position to get anything she needed from Governor Hart.

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<v Charlie Incarica>The forensics team was finally brought back in to the scene of the crime.

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<v Charlie Incarica>When the team confirmed microscopic drops of blood of a fourth person, Branagan had no problem getting a warrant demanding Margaret Mandragora Jones Putnam's DNA sample.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Finally, on September 29th, the DNA test came back a match, and Taylor Branagin personally went to Margaret's hotel suite and made the arrest.

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<v Taylor Branigan>I have to admit, it was one of the more rewarding moments of my police career.

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<v Taylor Branigan>I felt proud.

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<v Taylor Branigan>Exhausted beyond words, but proud.

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<v Estelle Hayes>I'll admit it, I was kind of psyched.

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<v Estelle Hayes>By September, I'd more or less binged every show that was bingeable.

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<v Estelle Hayes>I think we all had.

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<v Charlie Incarica>So would it be safe to say you were ready to binge on justice?

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<v Estelle Hayes>Why can't you just have a normal conversation?

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<v Charlie Incarica>But these were not normal times.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Margaret was arraigned on September 30th and left the county courthouse to face the media.

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<v Ellen Newberry>These charges are obviously a desperate stab by the DA to make headlines, though I obviously regret my phrasing of that.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Margaret, did you do it?

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<v Margaret Mandragora-Jones>Dear Lord, it's like Woodward fucked Bernstein and out you shot.

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<v Margaret Mandragora-Jones>You need to go back to a corner of your basement apartment and think about what you've done.

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<v Margaret Mandragora-Jones>Anyone else here like to train their bubble wrap sharp wit on me?

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<v Margaret Mandragora-Jones>Yeah, you, the one with the obviously fraught relationship with your barber.

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<v Charlie Incarica>You've likely already seen this whole 15-minute press conference on YouTube, and though I felt we had to reference it here, as it's significant to the story.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Listening anymore is just hard.

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<v Charlie Incarica>The county had to provide crisis counselors for everyone there.

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<v Charlie Incarica>However, Estelle believes this was a deliberate play on her part.

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<v Estelle Hayes>Of course it was.

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<v Estelle Hayes>Her lawyer used that courtroom steps massacre along with resume press conference to argue for a change in venue.

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<v Estelle Hayes>Her argument was a sound one.

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<v Estelle Hayes>There was no way anyone who'd heard of her would be able to judge her fairly.

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<v Estelle Hayes>Except.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Except, while some did indeed find her deeply off-putting, others embraced what some called her refreshing heartlessness.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Soon, the hashtag meanmargaret memes was catching fire.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Still, in the Hindenburgian drama that was the 2020 news cycle, this story was more on the fringes than one might think.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Margaret urged her followers to lobby Court TV to broadcast the trial, which was set to begin on January 6th, 2021.

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<v Charlie Incarica>A day that would be free from any distractions or insurrections.

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<v Charlie Incarica>A jury was chosen, and D.A.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Teresa Nolo began her preparations for the state.

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<v Charlie Incarica>A dozen shady Grovians would decide the fate of Margaret Mandragora Jones Putnam.

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<v Charlie Incarica>What verdict would they render?

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<v Charlie Incarica>You'll have to wait until our next episode.

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<v Charlie Incarica>Unless you Google it.

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<v Charlie Incarica>But don't.

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<v Charlie Incarica>I'm Charles Inkarika, and this continues to be The Murderer Killings.