Queer Quest: a quantum-inspired journey of self-discovery
This episode of Physics World Stories features an interview with Jessica Esquivel and Emily Esquivel – the creative duo behind Queer Quest. The event created a shared space for 2SLGBTQIA+ Black and Brown people working in science, technology, engineering, arts and mathematics (STEAM).
Mental health professionals also joined Queer Quest, which was officially recognized by UNESCO as part of the International Year of Quantum Science and Technology (IYQ). Over two days in Chicago this October, the event brought science, identity and wellbeing into powerful conversation.
Jessica Esquivel, a particle physicist and associate scientist at Fermilab, is part of the Muon g-2 experiment, pushing the limits of the Standard Model. Emily Esquivel is a licensed clinical professional counsellor. Together, they run Oyanova, an organization empowering Black and Brown communities through science and wellness.
Quantum metaphors and resilience through connection Courtesy: OyanovaQueer Quest blended keynote talks, with collective conversations, alongside meditation and other wellbeing activities. Panellists drew on quantum metaphors – such as entanglement – to explore identity, community and mental health.
In a wide-ranging conversation with podcast host Andrew Glester, Jessica and Emily speak about the inspiration for the event, and the personal challenges they have faced within academia. They speak about the importance of building resilience through community connections, especially given the social tensions in the US right now.
Hear more from Jessica Esquivel in her 2021 Physics World Stories appearance on the latest developments in muon science.
This article forms part of Physics World‘s contribution to the 2025 International Year of Quantum Science and Technology (IYQ), which aims to raise global awareness of quantum physics and its applications.
Stayed tuned to Physics World and our international partners throughout the year for more coverage of the IYQ.
Find out more on our quantum channel.
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1 00:00:02,639 --> 00:00:05,040 Hello, and welcome to the Physics World Stories 2 00:00:05,040 --> 00:00:08,650 podcast. I'm Andre Glesser. And in October 3 00:00:08,650 --> 00:00:09,859 2025, 4 00:00:10,320 --> 00:00:13,199 Queer Quest, a journey to self discovery, took 5 00:00:13,199 --> 00:00:14,644 place in Chicago. 6 00:00:15,664 --> 00:00:17,765 The event was recognized by UNESCO 7 00:00:18,225 --> 00:00:21,105 as officially part of the International Year of 8 00:00:21,105 --> 00:00:24,224 Quantum Science and Technology. In this episode, we're 9 00:00:24,224 --> 00:00:27,279 joined by Jessica and Emily Esquivel, who have 10 00:00:27,279 --> 00:00:30,259 come together to create this innovative event. 11 00:00:30,599 --> 00:00:31,099 And 12 00:00:31,439 --> 00:00:33,219 it is, of course, in Chicago 13 00:00:33,679 --> 00:00:37,939 where recent increased immigration enforcement operations have created 14 00:00:38,159 --> 00:00:41,905 a heightened sense of tension and uncertainty across 15 00:00:41,965 --> 00:00:42,784 many communities. 16 00:00:43,245 --> 00:00:44,625 It's within this atmosphere 17 00:00:44,925 --> 00:00:45,664 that QueerQuest 18 00:00:46,204 --> 00:00:46,945 was forged 19 00:00:47,245 --> 00:00:50,304 with a view to build connection and resilience, 20 00:00:51,005 --> 00:00:53,484 offering as a reminder that science is not 21 00:00:53,484 --> 00:00:53,984 separate 22 00:00:54,445 --> 00:00:56,340 from the lives of those who do it. 23 00:00:58,579 --> 00:01:02,039 I'm doctor Jessica Esquivel. I'm a particle physicist 24 00:01:02,260 --> 00:01:04,519 and cofounder of Oya Nova Enterprises. 25 00:01:05,620 --> 00:01:07,159 I am Emily Esquivel. 26 00:01:07,540 --> 00:01:09,319 I am a licensed clinical 27 00:01:09,620 --> 00:01:10,680 professional counselor, 28 00:01:12,084 --> 00:01:14,724 and I'm the other cofounder, the mental health 29 00:01:14,724 --> 00:01:16,505 side of Oya Nova Enterprises, 30 00:01:17,045 --> 00:01:18,584 and I own my own, 31 00:01:19,045 --> 00:01:22,325 private practice called Oya Nova Healing. So Oya 32 00:01:22,325 --> 00:01:25,525 Nova is really us, I would say, in 33 00:01:25,525 --> 00:01:26,665 business form. 34 00:01:27,090 --> 00:01:30,549 The mission of Oya Nova is to forge 35 00:01:31,009 --> 00:01:34,390 innovative social initiatives through the power of community, 36 00:01:35,489 --> 00:01:37,590 and QueerQuest is one of those initiatives. 37 00:01:38,450 --> 00:01:39,829 We realized that 38 00:01:40,769 --> 00:01:42,310 as we were going through 39 00:01:43,045 --> 00:01:44,984 the ivory tower of academia, 40 00:01:45,604 --> 00:01:48,344 we saw a lot of, like, professional development 41 00:01:48,564 --> 00:01:49,064 spaces 42 00:01:49,524 --> 00:01:52,244 that were really focused only on the career 43 00:01:52,244 --> 00:01:52,744 progression 44 00:01:53,045 --> 00:01:54,984 of us in both of our fields. 45 00:01:56,959 --> 00:01:58,180 But when you're marginalized 46 00:01:59,200 --> 00:02:01,379 in STEAM, when you're marginalized in, 47 00:02:01,759 --> 00:02:03,060 mental health practice, 48 00:02:05,280 --> 00:02:07,219 leaving that holistic approach 49 00:02:07,599 --> 00:02:08,819 to career progression 50 00:02:09,120 --> 00:02:10,259 was was lacking. 51 00:02:11,155 --> 00:02:13,574 And that's where we thought Olinova could really 52 00:02:14,354 --> 00:02:17,395 find that niche. Mhmm. I think through our 53 00:02:17,395 --> 00:02:19,574 conversations, we were really realizing, 54 00:02:21,634 --> 00:02:22,134 that, 55 00:02:23,079 --> 00:02:23,579 yes, 56 00:02:23,879 --> 00:02:24,859 higher education 57 00:02:25,159 --> 00:02:25,979 is important, 58 00:02:26,519 --> 00:02:29,739 but at what cost Mhmm. To our bodies, 59 00:02:29,879 --> 00:02:32,060 to our mental health, to our well-being. 60 00:02:33,719 --> 00:02:35,579 And I think we both 61 00:02:36,485 --> 00:02:37,384 had firsthand 62 00:02:37,685 --> 00:02:38,185 experiences 63 00:02:39,125 --> 00:02:41,224 of struggling to maintain 64 00:02:42,164 --> 00:02:43,064 our bodies, 65 00:02:43,525 --> 00:02:44,425 our minds 66 00:02:44,965 --> 00:02:47,224 as we moved through the 67 00:02:47,525 --> 00:02:48,745 education system. 68 00:02:49,044 --> 00:02:50,664 Yeah. In a lot of ways, 69 00:02:51,050 --> 00:02:51,870 for marginalized 70 00:02:52,169 --> 00:02:52,669 people, 71 00:02:54,650 --> 00:02:55,150 academia 72 00:02:55,449 --> 00:02:57,849 can be like a toxic relationship 73 00:02:58,169 --> 00:03:00,590 Mhmm. That you just can't kick. Right? 74 00:03:01,530 --> 00:03:02,270 I have 75 00:03:02,729 --> 00:03:06,090 a a passion for for physics and for 76 00:03:06,090 --> 00:03:06,590 studying, 77 00:03:07,105 --> 00:03:09,125 you know, the building blocks of our universe, 78 00:03:09,585 --> 00:03:13,205 but that came at a cost to 79 00:03:13,825 --> 00:03:14,564 my well-being 80 00:03:15,025 --> 00:03:17,585 and and being high cost. Yeah. And being 81 00:03:17,585 --> 00:03:18,805 in spaces that 82 00:03:19,105 --> 00:03:20,165 truly affected, 83 00:03:20,705 --> 00:03:22,085 like, my mental health. 84 00:03:23,150 --> 00:03:24,610 And when talking to 85 00:03:25,069 --> 00:03:27,949 specifically other black women in the field of 86 00:03:27,949 --> 00:03:28,449 physics, 87 00:03:28,990 --> 00:03:29,490 this, 88 00:03:30,110 --> 00:03:31,810 depression after PhD 89 00:03:32,509 --> 00:03:33,009 was 90 00:03:33,469 --> 00:03:35,330 a norm and not an anomaly. 91 00:03:36,194 --> 00:03:38,594 And we weren't talking about how it kind 92 00:03:38,594 --> 00:03:41,014 of ravaged our bodies and our minds. 93 00:03:42,194 --> 00:03:45,254 And while it's a huge accomplishment, like, 94 00:03:45,555 --> 00:03:46,215 I know 95 00:03:46,754 --> 00:03:48,914 that I'm only one of a 150 black 96 00:03:48,914 --> 00:03:51,240 women with a PhD in physics. Like, that's 97 00:03:51,400 --> 00:03:52,139 huge. But 98 00:03:53,159 --> 00:03:55,819 the weight of it, right, was also huge. 99 00:03:57,480 --> 00:03:59,800 And, yeah, we really just wanted to create 100 00:03:59,800 --> 00:04:02,780 a safe space to have conversations like that. 101 00:04:03,240 --> 00:04:04,620 And it wasn't until, 102 00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:06,300 like, 2020 103 00:04:06,995 --> 00:04:07,495 that 104 00:04:08,034 --> 00:04:10,294 even the conversation around mental health 105 00:04:10,594 --> 00:04:12,675 was bubbling up to the surface in our, 106 00:04:12,675 --> 00:04:13,495 like, science 107 00:04:13,875 --> 00:04:15,735 fields. It was these conversations 108 00:04:16,115 --> 00:04:18,514 between Jessica and Emily around the time of 109 00:04:18,514 --> 00:04:19,975 the COVID nineteen pandemic 110 00:04:20,290 --> 00:04:22,629 that led them to see the critical need 111 00:04:22,930 --> 00:04:23,589 for connections 112 00:04:23,970 --> 00:04:26,470 and support networks within higher education, 113 00:04:27,009 --> 00:04:30,310 especially for marginalized groups. And these conversations 114 00:04:30,770 --> 00:04:32,954 were the start of a journey that led 115 00:04:32,954 --> 00:04:34,574 to the creation of QueerQuest, 116 00:04:35,115 --> 00:04:37,615 an event that blended the boundaries of science, 117 00:04:37,754 --> 00:04:39,134 healing, and community 118 00:04:39,435 --> 00:04:42,974 to celebrate black, brown, and queer identities. 119 00:04:43,754 --> 00:04:45,995 When Em and I were having these late 120 00:04:45,995 --> 00:04:46,814 night conversations, 121 00:04:50,660 --> 00:04:51,960 having the the 122 00:04:53,220 --> 00:04:56,420 the understanding of, like, what it means to 123 00:04:56,420 --> 00:04:56,920 be 124 00:04:57,379 --> 00:04:57,879 black, 125 00:04:58,180 --> 00:04:59,480 brown, queer, 126 00:04:59,939 --> 00:05:00,439 marginalized 127 00:05:00,900 --> 00:05:01,639 in STEAM, 128 00:05:02,324 --> 00:05:03,064 and and 129 00:05:04,324 --> 00:05:07,785 how therapy and therapists can help support that 130 00:05:07,845 --> 00:05:08,345 journey. 131 00:05:08,725 --> 00:05:10,485 Like, that was also kind of, like, a 132 00:05:10,644 --> 00:05:12,185 an a part of that puzzle. 133 00:05:12,564 --> 00:05:14,404 Yeah. And I would say from the mental 134 00:05:14,404 --> 00:05:17,829 health perspective, it was through those conversations too 135 00:05:17,829 --> 00:05:19,129 that you start realizing, 136 00:05:20,149 --> 00:05:22,449 oh, there are serious limitations to, 137 00:05:24,470 --> 00:05:26,329 just one on one talk therapy. 138 00:05:26,870 --> 00:05:27,370 And 139 00:05:27,990 --> 00:05:30,069 while it's great and amazing and I'm a 140 00:05:30,069 --> 00:05:31,754 therapist and that's what I do, 141 00:05:32,955 --> 00:05:34,254 it has its limitations. 142 00:05:34,875 --> 00:05:35,375 And 143 00:05:35,995 --> 00:05:36,555 we were 144 00:05:37,435 --> 00:05:39,834 the more we started having these conversations, the 145 00:05:39,834 --> 00:05:40,334 more, 146 00:05:41,115 --> 00:05:42,334 we started recognizing 147 00:05:42,795 --> 00:05:45,435 how many people were also having the same 148 00:05:45,435 --> 00:05:47,370 experience in higher education, 149 00:05:48,790 --> 00:05:50,949 where it was taking a toll on their 150 00:05:50,949 --> 00:05:53,529 mental health, on their bodies, and the sacrifices 151 00:05:53,910 --> 00:05:56,330 being made to do this. So, 152 00:05:56,870 --> 00:05:59,050 yeah, this is part of, I think, 153 00:05:59,830 --> 00:06:00,330 what 154 00:06:00,785 --> 00:06:04,004 got me thinking more about the limitations 155 00:06:04,464 --> 00:06:04,964 of 156 00:06:05,345 --> 00:06:06,644 white westernized 157 00:06:07,345 --> 00:06:07,845 theories 158 00:06:08,865 --> 00:06:12,485 for mental health and really leaning into more, 159 00:06:13,740 --> 00:06:15,360 like, holistic practices, 160 00:06:16,620 --> 00:06:18,160 to address the whole person, 161 00:06:18,779 --> 00:06:20,939 not just the individual. Yeah. And I think 162 00:06:20,939 --> 00:06:23,579 that's where, one, QueerQuest was born, right, out 163 00:06:23,579 --> 00:06:24,959 of those late night conversations, 164 00:06:25,740 --> 00:06:26,560 and, two, 165 00:06:26,925 --> 00:06:28,144 how quantum mechanics 166 00:06:29,165 --> 00:06:30,625 became like our 167 00:06:31,004 --> 00:06:31,824 North Star. 168 00:06:32,444 --> 00:06:35,904 And we use these concepts of superposition, 169 00:06:36,685 --> 00:06:39,425 of being in many states, of entanglement, 170 00:06:40,199 --> 00:06:42,139 of, understanding that 171 00:06:42,439 --> 00:06:43,660 healing in community 172 00:06:44,199 --> 00:06:47,240 is better than, you know, isolated kind of, 173 00:06:48,199 --> 00:06:48,699 healing. 174 00:06:49,399 --> 00:06:49,899 Mhmm. 175 00:06:50,279 --> 00:06:52,379 And and we kind of 176 00:06:54,360 --> 00:06:55,500 framed QueerQuest, 177 00:06:56,894 --> 00:06:59,935 with quantum mechanics and use quantum as, like, 178 00:06:59,935 --> 00:07:01,235 a framework for liberation. 179 00:07:01,774 --> 00:07:04,035 So all of our our workshops 180 00:07:04,495 --> 00:07:05,394 and our, 181 00:07:06,175 --> 00:07:06,675 questions, 182 00:07:07,214 --> 00:07:08,915 they they hit upon 183 00:07:09,615 --> 00:07:10,115 really 184 00:07:10,495 --> 00:07:11,634 complex concepts 185 00:07:12,310 --> 00:07:15,449 for, like, the general audience. Right? 186 00:07:16,870 --> 00:07:18,490 But what we saw 187 00:07:18,949 --> 00:07:19,769 was that 188 00:07:20,550 --> 00:07:21,689 there's language 189 00:07:22,230 --> 00:07:23,850 in the mental health space 190 00:07:25,125 --> 00:07:27,784 that mirrors a lot of the quantum mechanical 191 00:07:27,925 --> 00:07:30,264 concepts. It was so cool. It really 192 00:07:31,044 --> 00:07:31,544 was. 193 00:07:32,324 --> 00:07:34,185 And it wouldn't have like, those 194 00:07:34,884 --> 00:07:36,745 really awesome cross pollination 195 00:07:37,365 --> 00:07:37,865 conversations 196 00:07:38,699 --> 00:07:40,939 wouldn't have happened if we didn't have both 197 00:07:40,939 --> 00:07:44,300 therapists and scientists in the room. Mhmm. And 198 00:07:44,300 --> 00:07:44,959 I think, 199 00:07:45,339 --> 00:07:47,039 like, we've grown 200 00:07:47,899 --> 00:07:48,399 together 201 00:07:48,939 --> 00:07:50,319 because of those conversations, 202 00:07:51,099 --> 00:07:53,019 and it was just wild to see that 203 00:07:53,019 --> 00:07:54,345 kind of mirrored back 204 00:07:54,824 --> 00:07:56,045 to us. Mhmm. 205 00:07:56,665 --> 00:07:58,185 And one of I think the one of 206 00:07:58,185 --> 00:07:59,644 the, like, most meaningful 207 00:07:59,944 --> 00:08:03,245 meaningful feedback that I got was from 208 00:08:04,105 --> 00:08:04,605 sisters. 209 00:08:05,144 --> 00:08:07,704 One of them is a physicist, and the 210 00:08:07,704 --> 00:08:09,644 other one is a mental health therapist. 211 00:08:10,470 --> 00:08:12,250 And they said that their relationship 212 00:08:12,949 --> 00:08:14,810 was changed because of QueerQuest. 213 00:08:16,470 --> 00:08:18,330 Yeah. They they said that 214 00:08:19,670 --> 00:08:21,770 they weren't able to talk to each other, 215 00:08:22,150 --> 00:08:25,029 that the languages that each were using within 216 00:08:25,029 --> 00:08:25,770 their careers 217 00:08:26,414 --> 00:08:28,754 were, like, isolated and separate. 218 00:08:29,694 --> 00:08:32,754 But QueerQuest was able to give them language 219 00:08:33,534 --> 00:08:35,475 to shared language. Shared language. 220 00:08:36,894 --> 00:08:38,334 And now they're discussing. So, 221 00:08:39,549 --> 00:08:40,209 the physicist 222 00:08:41,549 --> 00:08:44,669 is a science communicator and educator, and she 223 00:08:44,669 --> 00:08:47,009 teaches teachers to teach science. 224 00:08:48,110 --> 00:08:50,990 And now they're having conversations about, like, let's 225 00:08:50,990 --> 00:08:53,889 expand that and use language, like science 226 00:08:54,355 --> 00:08:58,375 communication language to help mental health therapists expand 227 00:08:58,434 --> 00:08:59,174 how they 228 00:08:59,795 --> 00:09:03,394 help with healing and and therapy. Okay. It 229 00:09:03,394 --> 00:09:05,475 was wild. It was just wild. Like 230 00:09:06,910 --> 00:09:09,070 And I think that was also that was 231 00:09:09,070 --> 00:09:11,470 part of the hope for us in bringing 232 00:09:11,470 --> 00:09:14,110 together these two communities at an event like 233 00:09:14,110 --> 00:09:16,990 this. I mean, it's us. Right? We have 234 00:09:16,990 --> 00:09:17,490 come 235 00:09:17,870 --> 00:09:18,769 to an understanding 236 00:09:19,309 --> 00:09:20,290 of each other 237 00:09:21,264 --> 00:09:24,144 throughout the last fifteen years and have a 238 00:09:24,144 --> 00:09:26,544 shared language about how we talk about science 239 00:09:26,544 --> 00:09:27,605 and mental health. 240 00:09:28,144 --> 00:09:28,644 And, 241 00:09:29,824 --> 00:09:31,125 I think just destigmatizing 242 00:09:31,985 --> 00:09:32,725 the conversations 243 00:09:33,105 --> 00:09:35,584 Both on both ends. On both ends. Right? 244 00:09:35,584 --> 00:09:38,830 We had therapists saying, I'm just, quote, unquote, 245 00:09:38,830 --> 00:09:41,070 a therapist. Like, what am I doing with 246 00:09:41,070 --> 00:09:43,710 these scientists? Mhmm. And then we had scientists 247 00:09:43,710 --> 00:09:44,529 being like, 248 00:09:44,990 --> 00:09:47,629 woah. My mind is blown about what you 249 00:09:47,629 --> 00:09:50,815 just said about, like, mental health, like, in 250 00:09:50,815 --> 00:09:53,934 the context of what I just explained with 251 00:09:53,934 --> 00:09:55,714 regards to quantum physics. 252 00:09:56,095 --> 00:09:59,214 And so it really it was so cool 253 00:09:59,214 --> 00:09:59,954 to see 254 00:10:00,495 --> 00:10:04,289 these communities come together and create and demystify, 255 00:10:05,549 --> 00:10:06,049 destigmatize 256 00:10:06,909 --> 00:10:09,649 both fields and create a shared language, 257 00:10:10,990 --> 00:10:11,490 where, 258 00:10:12,350 --> 00:10:15,809 just the connections were amazing. Yeah. Yeah. 259 00:10:16,804 --> 00:10:18,565 Most of the people who listen to this 260 00:10:18,565 --> 00:10:20,804 probably won't have been to QueerQuest. So can 261 00:10:20,804 --> 00:10:22,644 can you tell me what people would experience 262 00:10:22,644 --> 00:10:24,964 when they were there? Oh, man. It was 263 00:10:24,964 --> 00:10:25,464 magical. 264 00:10:26,245 --> 00:10:27,225 So QueerQuest, 265 00:10:27,924 --> 00:10:30,105 we wanted it to be a space where 266 00:10:30,889 --> 00:10:35,389 black, brown, queer folk were centered and prioritized, 267 00:10:36,410 --> 00:10:36,910 where 268 00:10:38,889 --> 00:10:40,970 we we kind of said it was like 269 00:10:40,970 --> 00:10:42,590 a unconference conference. 270 00:10:43,225 --> 00:10:45,004 So we baked in 271 00:10:45,625 --> 00:10:47,404 time for rest and regulation. 272 00:10:48,184 --> 00:10:51,245 We baked in time for community building, 273 00:10:52,504 --> 00:10:53,004 and 274 00:10:53,465 --> 00:10:55,565 baked in those, like, spaces 275 00:10:55,945 --> 00:10:57,085 for conversation. 276 00:10:58,850 --> 00:11:02,049 So our days both days started out with 277 00:11:02,049 --> 00:11:03,750 a cosmic awakening 278 00:11:04,209 --> 00:11:05,669 slash grounding ceremony. 279 00:11:06,289 --> 00:11:08,529 So well, it started out with breakfast because 280 00:11:08,529 --> 00:11:09,509 food is important. 281 00:11:10,690 --> 00:11:11,589 In our communities 282 00:11:11,889 --> 00:11:13,509 in in our cultures, 283 00:11:14,245 --> 00:11:17,304 we build community around food. So that was 284 00:11:17,444 --> 00:11:20,564 also a very intentional space that we created. 285 00:11:20,564 --> 00:11:22,804 Yeah. We had so many people. We we 286 00:11:22,804 --> 00:11:24,584 had a local chef from Chicago, 287 00:11:25,764 --> 00:11:26,985 black, queer owned, 288 00:11:28,240 --> 00:11:28,480 and, 289 00:11:29,600 --> 00:11:31,519 he just pulled out all the stops for 290 00:11:31,519 --> 00:11:34,159 breakfast. And we got so many comments talking 291 00:11:34,159 --> 00:11:36,159 about, oh, we thought this was just gonna 292 00:11:36,159 --> 00:11:38,419 be, like, a sad continental breakfast, 293 00:11:39,039 --> 00:11:41,379 both, like, with bagels and cream cheese. 294 00:11:42,725 --> 00:11:44,804 He invited us into his home. It felt 295 00:11:44,804 --> 00:11:47,845 like we were sitting around his family kitchen 296 00:11:47,845 --> 00:11:50,485 table, and that that's what we wanted. That's 297 00:11:50,485 --> 00:11:53,284 what started off our event. Yes. And then 298 00:11:53,284 --> 00:11:55,580 we moved into to our morning ritual, which 299 00:11:55,580 --> 00:11:57,519 was a thirty minute grounding 300 00:11:58,059 --> 00:12:00,860 ceremony. One day, we had yoga, and the 301 00:12:00,860 --> 00:12:02,559 other day, I think, we had reflections, 302 00:12:03,899 --> 00:12:06,220 and intention setting. So that started 303 00:12:06,804 --> 00:12:09,205 Those two things started off the day. Then 304 00:12:09,205 --> 00:12:10,665 we moved into a keynote, 305 00:12:12,325 --> 00:12:15,065 where on day one, we had Jessica 306 00:12:15,524 --> 00:12:16,024 and, 307 00:12:17,045 --> 00:12:19,384 Desiree Whitmore, our laser physicist. 308 00:12:19,870 --> 00:12:23,149 Who weaved or who both set the stage 309 00:12:23,149 --> 00:12:23,649 for 310 00:12:24,029 --> 00:12:25,009 quantum mechanics, 311 00:12:25,389 --> 00:12:26,769 mental health, nonbinariness, 312 00:12:28,669 --> 00:12:29,169 and, 313 00:12:29,549 --> 00:12:30,929 yeah, really just looking 314 00:12:31,389 --> 00:12:34,049 into the, like, fabric of our universe 315 00:12:35,815 --> 00:12:36,475 to highlight 316 00:12:37,095 --> 00:12:40,375 and uplift the experiences and journeys that we 317 00:12:40,375 --> 00:12:42,774 as queer people are taking and really just 318 00:12:42,774 --> 00:12:44,154 kind of showing that 319 00:12:45,014 --> 00:12:46,394 in the quantum realm, 320 00:12:46,860 --> 00:12:47,600 our nonbinariness, 321 00:12:48,539 --> 00:12:52,399 our weirdness, our queerness is actually more integrated 322 00:12:52,460 --> 00:12:55,200 into the fabric of space time than society 323 00:12:55,339 --> 00:12:58,399 is letting on, than society is telling us. 324 00:12:58,894 --> 00:13:00,815 And then we moved into the really cool 325 00:13:00,815 --> 00:13:02,754 part of the day, which was the multiverse. 326 00:13:04,174 --> 00:13:05,955 And we transformed, 327 00:13:07,695 --> 00:13:09,934 the gym at the center on Halsted here 328 00:13:09,934 --> 00:13:10,595 in Chicago, 329 00:13:11,139 --> 00:13:13,860 which is three full sized volleyball courts. So 330 00:13:13,860 --> 00:13:14,839 it is massive. 331 00:13:15,379 --> 00:13:18,440 We transformed that into our, quote, unquote, multiverse, 332 00:13:18,659 --> 00:13:21,379 and you just walked in, and there were 333 00:13:21,379 --> 00:13:23,639 just these huge arches 334 00:13:24,304 --> 00:13:27,024 that said you belong here. They were purple. 335 00:13:27,024 --> 00:13:28,485 They had all of our branding. 336 00:13:29,024 --> 00:13:30,464 Anyways, we had our, 337 00:13:31,745 --> 00:13:33,904 we had Galaxy on the Go, which is 338 00:13:33,904 --> 00:13:34,644 a mobile 339 00:13:35,264 --> 00:13:35,764 Planetary. 340 00:13:36,315 --> 00:13:36,815 Planetarium 341 00:13:38,429 --> 00:13:41,169 and just designed a really amazing 342 00:13:42,029 --> 00:13:43,649 Visual video film, 343 00:13:44,750 --> 00:13:46,209 that kind of walk through 344 00:13:46,750 --> 00:13:47,649 our past, 345 00:13:48,990 --> 00:13:50,049 queer ancestors, 346 00:13:50,589 --> 00:13:52,129 moved into our modern 347 00:13:53,084 --> 00:13:54,065 movement builders, 348 00:13:54,445 --> 00:13:55,504 where we highlighted, 349 00:13:56,684 --> 00:13:59,504 scientists core scientists from 500 core scientists, 350 00:13:59,884 --> 00:14:01,804 and then we moved into what the future 351 00:14:01,804 --> 00:14:02,464 could be, 352 00:14:02,924 --> 00:14:04,065 all in five minutes. 353 00:14:06,879 --> 00:14:09,360 And then we had our resource village, which 354 00:14:09,360 --> 00:14:12,240 had community partners from all around Chicago Both 355 00:14:12,240 --> 00:14:14,399 in STEAM and in mental health. That our 356 00:14:14,399 --> 00:14:17,279 attendees could engage with, talk with, get resources 357 00:14:17,679 --> 00:14:19,299 Yeah. Adler port planetarium 358 00:14:19,679 --> 00:14:20,079 was, 359 00:14:20,674 --> 00:14:22,694 in attendance. We had the Chicago 360 00:14:23,235 --> 00:14:24,534 Science and Technology, 361 00:14:25,475 --> 00:14:27,254 c two s t, 362 00:14:28,834 --> 00:14:30,294 Chicago Therapy Collective. 363 00:14:31,235 --> 00:14:33,894 The Depth Collective Yeah. Which is an amazing 364 00:14:34,539 --> 00:14:37,360 small group practice here in Chicago, mental health. 365 00:14:37,899 --> 00:14:40,240 And then we had our rest and regulation 366 00:14:40,379 --> 00:14:42,620 lounge, which I think was probably the highlight 367 00:14:42,620 --> 00:14:45,179 for a lot of people. Mhmm. That's where 368 00:14:45,179 --> 00:14:47,679 we had our cosmic awakenings in the morning. 369 00:14:47,740 --> 00:14:50,325 And then we had hammocks. We had 370 00:14:50,784 --> 00:14:51,284 biofeedback 371 00:14:51,904 --> 00:14:54,384 pods, which was really like a four foot 372 00:14:54,384 --> 00:14:54,884 beanbag 373 00:14:55,664 --> 00:14:58,084 inside of a pod we created. Mhmm. 374 00:14:58,384 --> 00:14:59,205 And each 375 00:14:59,664 --> 00:15:01,924 pod, we had three, had a different 376 00:15:02,384 --> 00:15:03,205 tech inspired 377 00:15:05,480 --> 00:15:08,940 Biofeedback tool Yeah. To really show I mean, 378 00:15:09,480 --> 00:15:10,360 we as scientists 379 00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:13,559 I can speak for myself that the journey 380 00:15:13,559 --> 00:15:14,059 towards 381 00:15:14,360 --> 00:15:18,460 recognizing and and understanding and validating my mental 382 00:15:18,759 --> 00:15:20,615 health journey has been hard. 383 00:15:21,554 --> 00:15:23,975 Not only because I'm part of the black 384 00:15:24,195 --> 00:15:27,315 and Mexican community where, like, mental health, we're 385 00:15:27,315 --> 00:15:30,995 still working through shame. Right? But also in 386 00:15:30,995 --> 00:15:31,495 physics, 387 00:15:31,875 --> 00:15:33,415 like, there is shame around 388 00:15:34,669 --> 00:15:36,910 recognizing your mental health. Like, I am a 389 00:15:36,910 --> 00:15:37,889 late stage, 390 00:15:39,309 --> 00:15:39,809 ADHD 391 00:15:40,429 --> 00:15:41,730 diagnosed person. 392 00:15:42,429 --> 00:15:44,750 And I've talked to scientists that say I 393 00:15:44,750 --> 00:15:46,669 also have ADHD, but I don't talk about 394 00:15:46,669 --> 00:15:48,450 it because I don't want people to think 395 00:15:48,825 --> 00:15:50,764 any less of me as a scientist. 396 00:15:51,144 --> 00:15:52,665 So I really wanted to, 397 00:15:54,184 --> 00:15:54,925 have technology 398 00:15:56,105 --> 00:15:59,065 that we're comfortable with that we probably help 399 00:15:59,065 --> 00:16:01,565 develop in some way or fashion 400 00:16:02,105 --> 00:16:03,085 to show that 401 00:16:03,570 --> 00:16:04,070 meditation 402 00:16:04,769 --> 00:16:08,610 and and calmness really does affect our nervous 403 00:16:08,610 --> 00:16:09,110 system, 404 00:16:10,370 --> 00:16:13,029 for the better. So it was real time 405 00:16:13,090 --> 00:16:16,129 biofeedback to show. And people were so proud. 406 00:16:16,129 --> 00:16:18,345 They were quoting their numbers back to us. 407 00:16:18,345 --> 00:16:20,264 Like, you go in and you start with 408 00:16:20,264 --> 00:16:22,445 the meditation app, and, 409 00:16:23,544 --> 00:16:25,144 it gives you your number of, like, where 410 00:16:25,144 --> 00:16:26,524 your heart rate, your 411 00:16:26,825 --> 00:16:29,304 all of your resting stuff is at. And 412 00:16:29,304 --> 00:16:29,804 then, 413 00:16:30,825 --> 00:16:32,524 it walks you through the meditation. 414 00:16:32,985 --> 00:16:35,210 And, I mean, the numbers were 415 00:16:35,590 --> 00:16:36,090 significant 416 00:16:36,470 --> 00:16:37,450 decrease. Yeah. 417 00:16:38,710 --> 00:16:40,549 And the other thing I'll say about the 418 00:16:40,549 --> 00:16:42,790 rest and regulation lounge was we had people 419 00:16:42,790 --> 00:16:45,290 falling asleep in the in our hammock. 420 00:16:46,230 --> 00:16:49,004 And, you know, I thought in the moment 421 00:16:49,004 --> 00:16:50,144 that was amazing 422 00:16:50,524 --> 00:16:51,824 and and what we wanted, 423 00:16:52,204 --> 00:16:53,904 but it took another therapist, 424 00:16:54,284 --> 00:16:56,924 like, reflecting back to me how meaningful that 425 00:16:56,924 --> 00:16:59,584 was. And they said, like, you don't understand 426 00:17:00,044 --> 00:17:00,690 what it takes 427 00:17:01,330 --> 00:17:02,870 to get someone to feel safe enough 428 00:17:03,330 --> 00:17:06,049 to feel like they can fall asleep in 429 00:17:06,049 --> 00:17:08,690 a public place with people they don't know 430 00:17:08,690 --> 00:17:11,670 around them. Mhmm. So you need to 431 00:17:12,130 --> 00:17:14,130 kind of, like, let that sink in about 432 00:17:14,130 --> 00:17:16,605 the space y'all have created here. And I 433 00:17:16,605 --> 00:17:19,265 also want to kind of underscore that because 434 00:17:20,045 --> 00:17:23,005 center on Halsted is fifteen minutes away from 435 00:17:23,005 --> 00:17:23,505 Broadview 436 00:17:23,884 --> 00:17:25,424 where there's an ice camp. 437 00:17:26,684 --> 00:17:28,465 When we were doing, you know, 438 00:17:28,940 --> 00:17:31,980 walk throughs and tech checks and meeting, you 439 00:17:31,980 --> 00:17:34,640 know, with vendors at the center on Halsted, 440 00:17:34,940 --> 00:17:36,480 we're going back and forth 441 00:17:36,779 --> 00:17:37,759 in a very, 442 00:17:38,140 --> 00:17:40,240 like, high tension area. 443 00:17:43,455 --> 00:17:45,234 We were scared of driving. 444 00:17:45,695 --> 00:17:47,375 And the fact that we were able to 445 00:17:47,375 --> 00:17:50,174 create a a sanctuary, a space for people 446 00:17:50,174 --> 00:17:52,914 to feel safe enough to rest, 447 00:17:53,455 --> 00:17:53,955 right, 448 00:17:54,599 --> 00:17:55,579 As marginalized 449 00:17:55,880 --> 00:17:56,380 people 450 00:17:56,680 --> 00:17:59,000 who are scared of the current climate, who 451 00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:01,160 are scared of the current environment that we 452 00:18:01,160 --> 00:18:02,140 are living in, 453 00:18:02,599 --> 00:18:04,619 that was Yeah. Alright. 454 00:18:05,079 --> 00:18:07,799 That was deep. That's a lovely, lovely, lovely 455 00:18:07,799 --> 00:18:08,299 thing. 456 00:18:08,724 --> 00:18:10,005 What isn't a lovely thing that you just 457 00:18:10,005 --> 00:18:11,764 mentioned is the current climate. Can you tell 458 00:18:11,764 --> 00:18:14,024 me a bit about how it feels living 459 00:18:14,085 --> 00:18:14,585 in 460 00:18:14,884 --> 00:18:17,784 where you're living now? Or I mean, we're 461 00:18:18,005 --> 00:18:18,505 probably 462 00:18:19,125 --> 00:18:22,410 20 miles outside of Chicago where we live, 463 00:18:24,250 --> 00:18:26,349 and ice has made its way 464 00:18:27,529 --> 00:18:29,789 to lots of pockets around us. 465 00:18:32,009 --> 00:18:34,830 And I would say that I know Chicago 466 00:18:34,890 --> 00:18:36,809 gets a bad rap and has a bad 467 00:18:36,809 --> 00:18:37,309 rap, 468 00:18:37,765 --> 00:18:40,505 but being this sort of war torn 469 00:18:41,045 --> 00:18:43,605 city that media is making it out to 470 00:18:43,605 --> 00:18:44,105 be, 471 00:18:44,484 --> 00:18:46,164 it's just not. It's so 472 00:18:47,684 --> 00:18:49,785 I mean, Chicago loves Chicago, 473 00:18:50,325 --> 00:18:52,164 and we are gonna take care of each 474 00:18:52,164 --> 00:18:53,065 other always. 475 00:18:54,130 --> 00:18:56,470 And and you can't push Chicagoans 476 00:18:56,769 --> 00:18:57,269 around. 477 00:18:57,730 --> 00:18:59,509 Like, the fact that 478 00:18:59,890 --> 00:19:00,849 they have come 479 00:19:01,730 --> 00:19:03,509 that we have come together, 480 00:19:04,450 --> 00:19:04,950 and 481 00:19:06,734 --> 00:19:08,575 I don't even know how to explain it. 482 00:19:08,575 --> 00:19:09,154 I mean, 483 00:19:09,535 --> 00:19:10,174 go ahead. 484 00:19:10,575 --> 00:19:13,075 What breaks my heart is that it's 485 00:19:13,695 --> 00:19:14,575 we are all 486 00:19:17,934 --> 00:19:20,930 everything not everything was fine, but we did 487 00:19:20,930 --> 00:19:22,309 not have the government 488 00:19:23,250 --> 00:19:24,470 we did not have 489 00:19:25,170 --> 00:19:25,910 the violence 490 00:19:26,529 --> 00:19:28,069 that the government is 491 00:19:30,609 --> 00:19:32,710 Dropping in. Dropping into 492 00:19:33,329 --> 00:19:34,150 our state, 493 00:19:34,849 --> 00:19:35,829 our cities. 494 00:19:37,625 --> 00:19:39,164 Like, they are aggravating 495 00:19:39,544 --> 00:19:40,204 the people. 496 00:19:41,464 --> 00:19:43,785 We were just fine. And then they brought 497 00:19:43,785 --> 00:19:46,285 the national guard, and then they brought ICE. 498 00:19:46,664 --> 00:19:47,404 And they 499 00:19:47,785 --> 00:19:48,605 are intentionally 500 00:19:49,065 --> 00:19:52,190 creating conflict and causing harm. And it just 501 00:19:53,049 --> 00:19:55,049 it breaks my heart because what is the 502 00:19:55,049 --> 00:19:57,549 reason? Yeah. There's no reason for this. 503 00:19:58,170 --> 00:20:01,690 Yeah. I think in 2020, in 2021, 504 00:20:01,690 --> 00:20:04,315 I lost my dad. We had the peak 505 00:20:04,315 --> 00:20:06,015 civil unrest in our country, 506 00:20:06,474 --> 00:20:08,394 and I threw myself into work, and I 507 00:20:08,394 --> 00:20:09,534 threw myself into, 508 00:20:10,075 --> 00:20:12,954 like, movement building and activism. And I was 509 00:20:12,954 --> 00:20:13,454 consuming 510 00:20:13,835 --> 00:20:15,454 and consuming and consuming 511 00:20:15,755 --> 00:20:17,934 every aspect of media 512 00:20:18,660 --> 00:20:20,580 because I felt like I just needed to 513 00:20:20,580 --> 00:20:21,080 be 514 00:20:21,539 --> 00:20:23,299 in it. I needed to see what was 515 00:20:23,299 --> 00:20:24,119 going on. 516 00:20:24,500 --> 00:20:25,000 And 517 00:20:25,380 --> 00:20:26,360 this time 518 00:20:27,140 --> 00:20:27,640 around, 519 00:20:28,340 --> 00:20:30,500 for my mental health because that broke me. 520 00:20:30,500 --> 00:20:31,000 Like, 521 00:20:32,100 --> 00:20:33,400 my body shut down. 522 00:20:35,544 --> 00:20:36,605 This time around, 523 00:20:37,384 --> 00:20:39,724 I recognized the need to have boundaries, 524 00:20:40,424 --> 00:20:42,284 like, around my 525 00:20:42,904 --> 00:20:43,724 my peace 526 00:20:44,424 --> 00:20:47,005 and focus on creating spaces 527 00:20:48,664 --> 00:20:49,565 that I had 528 00:20:49,960 --> 00:20:51,960 the power to create. And I think that's 529 00:20:51,960 --> 00:20:55,160 where QueerQuest comes in. And it was hard. 530 00:20:55,160 --> 00:20:57,000 It was it has been hard this whole 531 00:20:57,000 --> 00:20:57,500 year 532 00:20:57,799 --> 00:21:00,460 to kind of keep our eyes on QueerQuest 533 00:21:00,840 --> 00:21:01,340 when 534 00:21:01,880 --> 00:21:04,255 there's so much going on around us on 535 00:21:04,255 --> 00:21:06,174 a day to day that it feels like 536 00:21:06,174 --> 00:21:07,474 what is the point. 537 00:21:08,095 --> 00:21:10,335 So many times I was there throughout the 538 00:21:10,335 --> 00:21:12,515 process of what is the point of this 539 00:21:12,815 --> 00:21:13,794 silly event. 540 00:21:15,294 --> 00:21:17,980 And then the event happens, and you hear 541 00:21:17,980 --> 00:21:20,480 from everyone how much they needed this. 542 00:21:20,779 --> 00:21:22,940 And you're like, oh, that's why we did 543 00:21:22,940 --> 00:21:25,819 it. So you did create QueerQuest. It happened. 544 00:21:25,819 --> 00:21:28,140 There's a few things about it which I 545 00:21:28,140 --> 00:21:29,819 don't know what they mean, and perhaps Emily 546 00:21:29,819 --> 00:21:31,599 can help me with this. What what's liberation? 547 00:21:32,044 --> 00:21:32,865 That's a good 548 00:21:34,005 --> 00:21:34,505 question. 549 00:21:35,644 --> 00:21:36,144 Liberation 550 00:21:36,525 --> 00:21:37,184 for me, 551 00:21:37,884 --> 00:21:38,384 I 552 00:21:39,085 --> 00:21:39,984 think, means 553 00:21:41,724 --> 00:21:44,605 just feeling like we are free from the 554 00:21:44,605 --> 00:21:45,105 systems 555 00:21:45,779 --> 00:21:46,519 that we 556 00:21:47,140 --> 00:21:49,000 are forced to exist in. 557 00:21:49,539 --> 00:21:52,039 I think it's feeling free to be creative, 558 00:21:52,100 --> 00:21:54,820 to build our own systems, to live outside 559 00:21:54,820 --> 00:21:56,740 of the systems that we're forced to live 560 00:21:56,740 --> 00:21:59,320 in. It means deciding, like, 561 00:21:59,914 --> 00:22:02,654 okay. Yes. I live in The United States. 562 00:22:04,234 --> 00:22:07,034 There are systems I must, like, I keep 563 00:22:07,034 --> 00:22:08,954 saying live in, but that doesn't mean I 564 00:22:08,954 --> 00:22:11,434 can't do anything about it. That doesn't mean 565 00:22:11,434 --> 00:22:13,309 I'm powerless. That means 566 00:22:13,690 --> 00:22:16,190 I there are choices. I have agency, 567 00:22:16,890 --> 00:22:17,390 and 568 00:22:18,569 --> 00:22:19,230 I can 569 00:22:19,769 --> 00:22:22,089 use my autonomy to build something new and 570 00:22:22,089 --> 00:22:22,589 different. 571 00:22:22,890 --> 00:22:25,214 Yeah. I totally agree that it it 572 00:22:25,694 --> 00:22:28,355 it comes down to autonomy and agency. 573 00:22:31,134 --> 00:22:31,634 And 574 00:22:32,654 --> 00:22:33,714 in some of these 575 00:22:34,575 --> 00:22:36,255 in the in this climate 576 00:22:36,734 --> 00:22:38,974 Mhmm. Sometimes it feels like we have no 577 00:22:38,974 --> 00:22:40,444 agency over ourselves. 578 00:22:43,829 --> 00:22:46,250 The kind of beautiful moments of of realizing 579 00:22:46,309 --> 00:22:48,789 the common language between the this kind of 580 00:22:48,789 --> 00:22:51,929 healing and and quantum world. But is there 581 00:22:52,149 --> 00:22:53,990 are there tensions there as well that you 582 00:22:53,990 --> 00:22:55,690 have to be aware of? Yes. Probably. 583 00:22:56,470 --> 00:22:56,970 But 584 00:22:58,605 --> 00:22:59,424 when you 585 00:23:00,045 --> 00:23:00,865 bring together 586 00:23:02,205 --> 00:23:03,825 black, brown, and queer folk 587 00:23:04,525 --> 00:23:05,585 who are used 588 00:23:06,605 --> 00:23:07,825 to world building 589 00:23:08,765 --> 00:23:09,505 to create 590 00:23:09,929 --> 00:23:10,429 spaces 591 00:23:11,690 --> 00:23:14,269 of comfort, of safety. Mhmm. 592 00:23:16,970 --> 00:23:17,789 The creativity 593 00:23:18,250 --> 00:23:19,309 and the innovation 594 00:23:20,329 --> 00:23:21,309 and the resilience 595 00:23:21,769 --> 00:23:24,669 is baked into that community already. 596 00:23:24,970 --> 00:23:25,470 Mhmm. 597 00:23:26,465 --> 00:23:28,244 So, like, I mean, I'm a science communicator. 598 00:23:28,465 --> 00:23:28,965 Right? 599 00:23:29,345 --> 00:23:30,884 And I've had conversations 600 00:23:31,184 --> 00:23:34,065 where I'm using QueerQuest as a QueerQuest. Quantum 601 00:23:34,065 --> 00:23:36,465 mechanics as a framework for liberation or quantum 602 00:23:36,465 --> 00:23:37,525 mechanics as, 603 00:23:38,210 --> 00:23:40,069 kind of a mirror to queerness 604 00:23:40,609 --> 00:23:41,109 in 605 00:23:41,650 --> 00:23:44,450 predominantly white spaces. And there is pushback. There 606 00:23:44,450 --> 00:23:44,950 is 607 00:23:45,410 --> 00:23:47,650 but hold on. Or, you know, you didn't 608 00:23:47,650 --> 00:23:49,670 accurately represent what superposition 609 00:23:50,144 --> 00:23:52,105 actually is. And there isn't a one to 610 00:23:52,105 --> 00:23:53,125 one, you know, 611 00:23:53,984 --> 00:23:55,684 mirror to, you know, 612 00:23:56,305 --> 00:23:58,785 whatever. Like, you do get that pushback. Right? 613 00:23:58,785 --> 00:24:00,724 There is this, like, pontification 614 00:24:01,345 --> 00:24:02,565 and and, 615 00:24:03,585 --> 00:24:04,085 academic, 616 00:24:05,345 --> 00:24:08,220 rigor that, like, bubbles up to the surface 617 00:24:08,599 --> 00:24:10,619 more so than when you're in 618 00:24:11,480 --> 00:24:11,980 community 619 00:24:12,359 --> 00:24:14,200 with folks that look like you. I don't 620 00:24:14,200 --> 00:24:15,880 know how to explain it, but there is 621 00:24:15,880 --> 00:24:17,099 just so much more 622 00:24:18,119 --> 00:24:18,619 willingness 623 00:24:19,319 --> 00:24:20,059 to receive 624 00:24:21,319 --> 00:24:22,595 this complex, 625 00:24:23,775 --> 00:24:24,275 intricate 626 00:24:24,734 --> 00:24:25,234 entanglement 627 00:24:25,855 --> 00:24:26,355 of 628 00:24:27,134 --> 00:24:30,674 different languages and different Mhmm. Career 629 00:24:31,694 --> 00:24:34,509 and Trajectory. I really hate to state the 630 00:24:34,509 --> 00:24:37,390 obvious, but I think there is something about 631 00:24:37,390 --> 00:24:39,329 being in non white spaces 632 00:24:39,950 --> 00:24:42,670 that allows that to happen because I think 633 00:24:42,670 --> 00:24:43,170 there 634 00:24:43,630 --> 00:24:46,349 there's something true for that about mental health 635 00:24:46,349 --> 00:24:47,650 therapists as well. 636 00:24:48,845 --> 00:24:51,884 The way that we are able to talk 637 00:24:51,884 --> 00:24:54,785 and engage differently without the pontificating 638 00:24:55,644 --> 00:24:58,205 and the holding on to theory, we are 639 00:24:58,205 --> 00:24:59,105 so like, 640 00:25:01,519 --> 00:25:03,039 therapists can be very 641 00:25:03,599 --> 00:25:05,940 Rigid. Rigid about us scientists. 642 00:25:06,399 --> 00:25:06,899 About. 643 00:25:07,919 --> 00:25:08,419 And 644 00:25:08,880 --> 00:25:09,380 in 645 00:25:10,159 --> 00:25:11,139 this space, 646 00:25:11,440 --> 00:25:12,419 it was just 647 00:25:13,694 --> 00:25:16,575 learning for learning's sake. Mhmm. Trying something new 648 00:25:16,575 --> 00:25:18,914 or thinking about something in a new way 649 00:25:19,214 --> 00:25:22,654 for fun. Just playing. Without being like, oh, 650 00:25:22,654 --> 00:25:25,794 well, you you got that theory wrong, or 651 00:25:26,019 --> 00:25:27,319 how dare you say 652 00:25:27,779 --> 00:25:30,119 mental health is x y z. Or 653 00:25:30,500 --> 00:25:31,400 there's just 654 00:25:31,940 --> 00:25:32,440 without 655 00:25:32,819 --> 00:25:36,019 what feels like without the oversight of white 656 00:25:36,019 --> 00:25:36,519 folks, 657 00:25:37,779 --> 00:25:40,839 black and brown people can just create 658 00:25:41,140 --> 00:25:41,640 create. 659 00:25:42,815 --> 00:25:43,955 Speaking of liberation, 660 00:25:45,055 --> 00:25:47,375 that's is kind of what it felt like. 661 00:25:47,375 --> 00:25:50,015 Yeah. The keynote speeches that you're having, are 662 00:25:50,015 --> 00:25:50,515 they 663 00:25:51,775 --> 00:25:54,174 predominantly about the science So day one, we 664 00:25:54,174 --> 00:25:55,714 opened up with quantum mechanics 665 00:25:56,095 --> 00:25:57,154 and what it meant 666 00:25:57,490 --> 00:25:59,190 and how it maps onto 667 00:25:59,569 --> 00:26:01,349 our lives as queer folk, 668 00:26:02,210 --> 00:26:04,049 and really just kind of setting the stage 669 00:26:04,049 --> 00:26:05,809 for what was to come in the, 670 00:26:06,289 --> 00:26:06,950 the event. 671 00:26:07,250 --> 00:26:08,950 And then Desiree Whitmore, 672 00:26:09,409 --> 00:26:10,869 she's the director of education 673 00:26:11,375 --> 00:26:13,555 at the Exploratorium in San Francisco, 674 00:26:15,375 --> 00:26:16,275 really took 675 00:26:16,894 --> 00:26:17,875 what I said 676 00:26:18,335 --> 00:26:19,475 and made it real. 677 00:26:19,855 --> 00:26:21,715 And we had hands on activities, 678 00:26:22,815 --> 00:26:24,835 where we were seeing kind of, like, superposition 679 00:26:25,055 --> 00:26:25,795 and entanglement 680 00:26:26,095 --> 00:26:27,589 in real time. 681 00:26:28,529 --> 00:26:29,029 And 682 00:26:29,490 --> 00:26:30,309 we got feedback 683 00:26:30,690 --> 00:26:31,670 where, like, 684 00:26:32,529 --> 00:26:33,910 people were in the room 685 00:26:34,849 --> 00:26:37,329 being like, oh, I don't know what the 686 00:26:37,329 --> 00:26:38,309 hell this is. 687 00:26:38,704 --> 00:26:40,305 I I don't know if I'm in the 688 00:26:40,305 --> 00:26:42,065 right space. I don't know if I can 689 00:26:42,065 --> 00:26:44,085 understand quantum. Right? 690 00:26:45,025 --> 00:26:48,224 And Desiree, like, solidified that for them. And 691 00:26:48,224 --> 00:26:51,045 throughout the rest of the the events, 692 00:26:51,569 --> 00:26:51,809 they 693 00:26:52,609 --> 00:26:55,829 it clicked. They got why therapists and scientists 694 00:26:55,890 --> 00:26:57,730 were hanging out together. Mhmm. 695 00:26:58,529 --> 00:27:01,329 And then for day two, we moved into 696 00:27:01,329 --> 00:27:03,190 kind of theory to practice, 697 00:27:03,569 --> 00:27:06,424 really. And we had doctor Raquel Martin, who 698 00:27:06,424 --> 00:27:06,924 is, 699 00:27:08,345 --> 00:27:08,845 a 700 00:27:09,305 --> 00:27:09,805 educator, 701 00:27:10,585 --> 00:27:11,085 psychologist, 702 00:27:12,105 --> 00:27:12,605 scientist. 703 00:27:13,065 --> 00:27:14,205 She's in the social 704 00:27:14,745 --> 00:27:17,325 media streets as she likes to say. 705 00:27:18,309 --> 00:27:20,309 And she's the well known kind of, 706 00:27:21,029 --> 00:27:22,009 voice for, 707 00:27:23,110 --> 00:27:24,570 she calls it mental 708 00:27:24,950 --> 00:27:26,890 wealth. Not health, wealth, 709 00:27:27,830 --> 00:27:31,049 and specifically for for black women's mental wealth. 710 00:27:31,994 --> 00:27:33,994 And, again, she just took some of the 711 00:27:33,994 --> 00:27:36,174 concepts that we talked about on day one 712 00:27:36,714 --> 00:27:39,595 and showed how they can be leveraged and 713 00:27:39,595 --> 00:27:42,575 used, when we're talking about our mental health. 714 00:27:43,909 --> 00:27:45,690 I think I'm just thinking because 715 00:27:46,470 --> 00:27:48,649 from a science communication point of view, 716 00:27:49,349 --> 00:27:51,669 quite apart from anything else, for just from 717 00:27:51,669 --> 00:27:53,769 the science communication point of view, having 718 00:27:54,149 --> 00:27:54,809 the space 719 00:27:55,109 --> 00:27:58,404 after you've had talks about and demonstrations of 720 00:27:58,404 --> 00:28:00,424 quantum mechanics, having the space to just 721 00:28:00,724 --> 00:28:03,164 think be, it's just a a really beautiful 722 00:28:03,365 --> 00:28:05,384 I'm just remembering when we spoke, 723 00:28:05,924 --> 00:28:07,845 several years ago, Jessica, when you you were 724 00:28:07,845 --> 00:28:09,605 talking to me about quantum foam and all 725 00:28:09,605 --> 00:28:11,190 these kind of things, I was like, wow. 726 00:28:11,669 --> 00:28:12,809 This is amazing. 727 00:28:13,589 --> 00:28:16,549 And what I could have done immediately after 728 00:28:16,549 --> 00:28:17,289 that conversation 729 00:28:17,750 --> 00:28:19,509 was, you know, go back to the day 730 00:28:19,509 --> 00:28:21,669 job and do some research into something else, 731 00:28:21,669 --> 00:28:23,190 but I didn't. I went for a walk, 732 00:28:23,509 --> 00:28:25,049 you know, amongst nature. 733 00:28:25,509 --> 00:28:26,234 And it just 734 00:28:27,035 --> 00:28:28,015 it it the 735 00:28:29,355 --> 00:28:30,494 the the concepts 736 00:28:30,954 --> 00:28:31,454 and, 737 00:28:32,154 --> 00:28:35,454 well, the experiments that are in, quantum mechanics 738 00:28:35,595 --> 00:28:36,095 are 739 00:28:37,035 --> 00:28:38,795 they deserve that time. So I think it's 740 00:28:38,795 --> 00:28:40,474 brilliant. Just from a science communication point of 741 00:28:40,474 --> 00:28:40,859 view, 742 00:28:43,500 --> 00:28:43,740 that that's how you designed it. Were you 743 00:28:43,740 --> 00:28:45,099 thinking about that as well from a science 744 00:28:45,099 --> 00:28:46,700 communication point of view when you were putting 745 00:28:46,700 --> 00:28:47,359 it together? 746 00:28:48,380 --> 00:28:50,480 I I think so. It's such a difficult 747 00:28:50,539 --> 00:28:52,240 concept even for me 748 00:28:52,779 --> 00:28:54,859 as a scientist who spends all my time 749 00:28:54,859 --> 00:28:58,144 in the quantum realm to, like, grasp. Right? 750 00:28:58,524 --> 00:29:00,944 And I think having space where 751 00:29:01,565 --> 00:29:04,125 you can, like, Rubik's cube it, right, and 752 00:29:04,125 --> 00:29:06,365 look at these concepts in such a different 753 00:29:06,365 --> 00:29:09,085 way and situate them in your day to 754 00:29:09,085 --> 00:29:09,904 day lives 755 00:29:10,204 --> 00:29:11,819 Mhmm. Makes it so that 756 00:29:12,779 --> 00:29:13,279 you 757 00:29:13,819 --> 00:29:17,200 under like, you you grasp it better. And 758 00:29:17,259 --> 00:29:18,000 to me, 759 00:29:19,419 --> 00:29:20,079 the, like, 760 00:29:21,019 --> 00:29:23,659 we did the damn thing for me was 761 00:29:23,659 --> 00:29:24,319 our videographer. 762 00:29:25,500 --> 00:29:28,065 On the last day, on the last interview 763 00:29:28,065 --> 00:29:31,045 that we had with him was saying, okay. 764 00:29:31,424 --> 00:29:34,804 Now tell me about the quantum mechanics and 765 00:29:34,865 --> 00:29:35,365 nonbinariness 766 00:29:36,065 --> 00:29:38,304 and and the superposition of states and how 767 00:29:38,304 --> 00:29:40,625 that wraps into what you created here at 768 00:29:40,625 --> 00:29:41,125 QueerQuest. 769 00:29:41,759 --> 00:29:42,980 He was mirroring 770 00:29:43,279 --> 00:29:44,740 back to us 771 00:29:45,119 --> 00:29:46,259 the quantum mechanical 772 00:29:46,559 --> 00:29:48,420 aspects of the of 773 00:29:48,799 --> 00:29:49,539 the conference 774 00:29:50,080 --> 00:29:51,920 that we had been talking about for two 775 00:29:51,920 --> 00:29:54,400 days. Yeah. You could really tell he had 776 00:29:54,400 --> 00:29:56,640 been listening. We did an interview on day 777 00:29:56,640 --> 00:29:57,494 one and day two. 778 00:29:58,214 --> 00:29:59,734 And at the end of day two, when 779 00:29:59,734 --> 00:30:01,494 the whole thing was over, you could just 780 00:30:01,494 --> 00:30:03,815 tell by the questions he was prompting us 781 00:30:03,815 --> 00:30:05,994 with Mhmm. That he had been listening 782 00:30:07,174 --> 00:30:10,394 to everything that had been happening, and that, 783 00:30:10,694 --> 00:30:12,900 like, that's it for us. Yeah. We want 784 00:30:13,059 --> 00:30:15,539 we want science and mental health to be 785 00:30:15,539 --> 00:30:16,039 accessible 786 00:30:16,900 --> 00:30:19,640 and a tool people can use and 787 00:30:20,339 --> 00:30:22,740 have fun with. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And we 788 00:30:22,740 --> 00:30:24,900 were also really intentional with all of our, 789 00:30:24,900 --> 00:30:26,200 like, parallel sessions, 790 00:30:27,194 --> 00:30:28,174 and our panels. 791 00:30:28,474 --> 00:30:29,615 There was a scientist 792 00:30:30,315 --> 00:30:32,015 and a mental health expert 793 00:30:32,394 --> 00:30:33,134 on each 794 00:30:33,595 --> 00:30:34,095 parallel, 795 00:30:34,875 --> 00:30:36,015 session. And, 796 00:30:37,355 --> 00:30:39,054 oh, man, the conversations 797 00:30:39,755 --> 00:30:40,734 that were happening 798 00:30:41,460 --> 00:30:41,960 were 799 00:30:42,339 --> 00:30:44,740 wild. Mhmm. So I'm just remembering one at 800 00:30:44,740 --> 00:30:45,400 the decolonizing 801 00:30:45,779 --> 00:30:47,480 therapy and science session. 802 00:30:48,019 --> 00:30:49,720 And our our therapist 803 00:30:50,659 --> 00:30:51,880 was talking about 804 00:30:52,500 --> 00:30:53,000 anxiety, 805 00:30:53,394 --> 00:30:56,595 I think. Right? Mhmm. And and and how 806 00:30:56,595 --> 00:30:57,575 difficult it is 807 00:30:57,954 --> 00:31:00,775 to meditate and to regulate 808 00:31:01,234 --> 00:31:05,075 the, like, anxious thoughts in your brain. Mhmm. 809 00:31:05,075 --> 00:31:06,855 And she stated something like, 810 00:31:08,029 --> 00:31:10,369 it starts with being able to observe 811 00:31:11,869 --> 00:31:14,210 the thoughts that are happening in your brain. 812 00:31:14,429 --> 00:31:16,929 And once you're able to observe them, 813 00:31:17,390 --> 00:31:19,730 you can essentially quiet them. 814 00:31:20,785 --> 00:31:23,765 And our scientist was like, holy shit. 815 00:31:24,065 --> 00:31:26,964 You just described the observer effect. 816 00:31:27,265 --> 00:31:28,244 You collapsed 817 00:31:29,025 --> 00:31:30,484 superposition of states 818 00:31:30,865 --> 00:31:31,924 in your brain 819 00:31:32,305 --> 00:31:35,679 by observe I know. I'm getting chills. Blow 820 00:31:35,819 --> 00:31:36,480 my mind. 821 00:31:37,500 --> 00:31:39,740 So those are the types of conversations that 822 00:31:39,740 --> 00:31:40,400 were happening 823 00:31:40,859 --> 00:31:41,679 all throughout 824 00:31:42,059 --> 00:31:44,700 the the event. Mhmm. And it was just 825 00:31:44,700 --> 00:31:47,179 like and and you should have seen how 826 00:31:47,179 --> 00:31:48,015 geeked out 827 00:31:48,734 --> 00:31:51,075 our panelists were. They were like 828 00:31:51,615 --> 00:31:53,615 and then after the session, they talked for 829 00:31:53,615 --> 00:31:56,115 over an hour just, I think, swapping 830 00:31:56,494 --> 00:31:56,994 languages, 831 00:31:57,535 --> 00:31:58,755 right, and 832 00:31:59,055 --> 00:32:01,869 building that shared language of let me, you 833 00:32:01,869 --> 00:32:04,509 just explained this, and holy crap. This is 834 00:32:04,509 --> 00:32:07,150 what you just explained. Mhmm. That and so 835 00:32:07,150 --> 00:32:08,990 much of the time and and at the 836 00:32:08,990 --> 00:32:11,470 beginning of the conference, the therapists were kind 837 00:32:11,470 --> 00:32:12,529 of like, oh, we're 838 00:32:12,990 --> 00:32:15,650 just therapists. This is all we do. 839 00:32:16,664 --> 00:32:19,544 Like, put next to a scientist. We we 840 00:32:19,544 --> 00:32:22,184 just do this. Mhmm. But by the end 841 00:32:22,184 --> 00:32:23,944 of it, it was so cool to see, 842 00:32:23,944 --> 00:32:25,164 like, oh, 843 00:32:26,265 --> 00:32:29,325 science actually isn't that hard. No. Yeah. 844 00:32:29,625 --> 00:32:30,605 Like, the concepts 845 00:32:31,250 --> 00:32:34,049 seem difficult. Yeah. Yeah. And there's and we 846 00:32:34,049 --> 00:32:35,590 all know that there's a hierarchy, 847 00:32:35,970 --> 00:32:39,890 right, of of science, right, and behavior science, 848 00:32:39,890 --> 00:32:40,950 especially in 849 00:32:41,730 --> 00:32:42,309 in western 850 00:32:43,805 --> 00:32:44,305 realms, 851 00:32:45,005 --> 00:32:47,184 it is deemed lesser than 852 00:32:47,484 --> 00:32:50,144 more objective or, quote, unquote, hard sciences. 853 00:32:50,684 --> 00:32:51,184 But 854 00:32:51,484 --> 00:32:52,224 the same 855 00:32:52,765 --> 00:32:54,625 concepts, the same tools, 856 00:32:56,045 --> 00:32:58,305 of, like, cracking open things 857 00:32:58,740 --> 00:32:59,559 and understanding 858 00:33:00,180 --> 00:33:00,680 complex, 859 00:33:02,180 --> 00:33:04,440 beings, whether that be particles 860 00:33:04,740 --> 00:33:05,640 or people. 861 00:33:06,259 --> 00:33:08,019 They're the same tools that are that are 862 00:33:08,019 --> 00:33:10,359 being leveraged and they're that are being developed 863 00:33:10,579 --> 00:33:11,295 in these 864 00:33:11,775 --> 00:33:14,815 careers Mhmm. In these professions. Who are the 865 00:33:14,815 --> 00:33:17,394 people who are walking the floors at QueerQuest? 866 00:33:17,455 --> 00:33:19,134 Who are they? Where where where do they 867 00:33:19,134 --> 00:33:21,555 come from? Are they all from Chicago? The 868 00:33:21,695 --> 00:33:24,734 furthest place we had someone come from was 869 00:33:24,734 --> 00:33:25,234 California, 870 00:33:25,809 --> 00:33:26,710 which is the 871 00:33:27,170 --> 00:33:28,789 opposite coast Yeah. 872 00:33:29,730 --> 00:33:31,650 From where we live. And then we had 873 00:33:31,650 --> 00:33:33,750 people from Michigan, from Tennessee, 874 00:33:35,170 --> 00:33:37,490 but it was largely Chicago. But we were 875 00:33:37,490 --> 00:33:39,330 so stoked that we even had out of 876 00:33:39,330 --> 00:33:40,549 town visitors. Mhmm. 877 00:33:41,575 --> 00:33:44,055 That was pretty wild. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, 878 00:33:44,055 --> 00:33:46,375 we built it with Chicago for Chicago. That 879 00:33:46,375 --> 00:33:48,775 was first and foremost. And when I say 880 00:33:48,775 --> 00:33:50,235 we built it with Chicago, 881 00:33:50,695 --> 00:33:52,075 it was small businesses. 882 00:33:52,615 --> 00:33:53,595 It was nonprofits. 883 00:33:54,455 --> 00:33:56,555 It was, you know, black and brown, 884 00:33:57,369 --> 00:33:57,869 queer, 885 00:33:59,049 --> 00:33:59,549 people 886 00:34:00,009 --> 00:34:02,569 that said we need this space. What do 887 00:34:02,569 --> 00:34:04,490 you need from us? Mhmm. And we could 888 00:34:04,490 --> 00:34:06,750 not have built it without them. Because 889 00:34:07,130 --> 00:34:10,109 here in The States, probably similar over there, 890 00:34:10,364 --> 00:34:13,005 anything DEI related, nobody wants to touch with 891 00:34:13,005 --> 00:34:14,784 a 10 foot pole. So 892 00:34:15,244 --> 00:34:18,204 we had, you know, plans of of of 893 00:34:18,204 --> 00:34:18,704 having 894 00:34:19,565 --> 00:34:20,065 sponsorships, 895 00:34:20,525 --> 00:34:21,585 having corporations, 896 00:34:22,045 --> 00:34:24,144 like, help fund this with us, 897 00:34:24,500 --> 00:34:27,539 But no one took our call from major 898 00:34:27,539 --> 00:34:30,039 corporations, and it was really small businesses 899 00:34:30,659 --> 00:34:33,239 and black, brown, queer owned community 900 00:34:33,539 --> 00:34:35,859 organizations who said, hell, yeah. Like, we don't 901 00:34:35,859 --> 00:34:38,025 have money, but we have people power. Yeah. 902 00:34:38,105 --> 00:34:40,344 We didn't have a production company. It was 903 00:34:40,344 --> 00:34:43,464 largely us and volunteers that built it. And 904 00:34:43,464 --> 00:34:45,565 when you see what it looks like, that 905 00:34:45,784 --> 00:34:47,625 in and of itself is gonna blow you 906 00:34:47,625 --> 00:34:48,125 away. 907 00:34:49,545 --> 00:34:50,924 We'll send the video. Yeah. 908 00:34:51,545 --> 00:34:55,309 Like, this was community built through and through, 909 00:34:55,309 --> 00:34:56,690 and I think it's a testament 910 00:34:57,230 --> 00:34:57,730 to 911 00:34:58,030 --> 00:35:00,450 us. Chicago Yeah. Not being a war zone. 912 00:35:00,510 --> 00:35:02,369 Exactly. And just showing, like, 913 00:35:02,829 --> 00:35:03,489 you can 914 00:35:03,950 --> 00:35:05,969 you can try to keep us down, 915 00:35:06,349 --> 00:35:09,085 but we are so much powerful when we 916 00:35:09,085 --> 00:35:10,464 come together. Yeah. 917 00:35:11,644 --> 00:35:13,804 The other side of it now, maybe it's 918 00:35:13,804 --> 00:35:15,644 the same advice you would have given before, 919 00:35:15,644 --> 00:35:17,904 but what what advice would you give to, 920 00:35:18,125 --> 00:35:20,304 you know, queer people who are in academia 921 00:35:20,684 --> 00:35:21,344 or stamina 922 00:35:21,680 --> 00:35:23,059 and are feeling isolated? 923 00:35:23,760 --> 00:35:25,539 I would start off with saying 924 00:35:26,480 --> 00:35:28,099 the feelings that you're feeling 925 00:35:28,480 --> 00:35:29,300 are valid. 926 00:35:31,280 --> 00:35:31,780 And 927 00:35:32,400 --> 00:35:33,700 I know that it feels 928 00:35:35,525 --> 00:35:36,025 isolating 929 00:35:36,324 --> 00:35:38,904 and that you're the only one going through 930 00:35:39,125 --> 00:35:39,625 that 931 00:35:40,484 --> 00:35:40,984 journey. 932 00:35:42,005 --> 00:35:42,824 But finding 933 00:35:43,684 --> 00:35:44,184 language 934 00:35:44,885 --> 00:35:45,784 to identify, 935 00:35:46,164 --> 00:35:47,224 like, the microaggressions 936 00:35:47,684 --> 00:35:49,950 and the traumas that you're going through 937 00:35:50,329 --> 00:35:51,150 is very, 938 00:35:53,050 --> 00:35:53,550 powerful. 939 00:35:54,250 --> 00:35:56,510 And then being able to share that language 940 00:35:56,570 --> 00:35:57,309 with others 941 00:35:57,849 --> 00:35:59,869 and seeing that there's shared experiences 942 00:36:00,890 --> 00:36:01,390 across 943 00:36:02,714 --> 00:36:05,835 your field and across other fields, that is 944 00:36:05,835 --> 00:36:08,074 also, like, really powerful. And I think that 945 00:36:08,074 --> 00:36:08,974 for like, 946 00:36:10,474 --> 00:36:13,275 the system is working as designed. Mhmm. It's 947 00:36:13,275 --> 00:36:15,500 trying to keep us apart. It's trying to 948 00:36:15,500 --> 00:36:17,739 make us feel like we're crazy. It's trying 949 00:36:17,739 --> 00:36:19,199 to make us feel alone. 950 00:36:19,579 --> 00:36:22,159 That is the way it was designed. 951 00:36:22,699 --> 00:36:24,719 So anything that we can do 952 00:36:25,099 --> 00:36:25,920 to counteract 953 00:36:26,460 --> 00:36:27,839 the feelings of isolation, 954 00:36:28,525 --> 00:36:30,465 the feelings of feeling crazy, 955 00:36:30,844 --> 00:36:32,545 the feelings of not belonging. 956 00:36:33,244 --> 00:36:35,824 That's how we break the system. Mhmm. So 957 00:36:35,965 --> 00:36:38,625 community is, like, one of the biggest ones, 958 00:36:38,684 --> 00:36:39,184 and 959 00:36:39,565 --> 00:36:40,065 developing 960 00:36:40,764 --> 00:36:41,264 language 961 00:36:42,284 --> 00:36:43,344 to, like, 962 00:36:44,289 --> 00:36:47,510 validate those experiences is really important. 963 00:36:48,690 --> 00:36:50,230 Yeah. And I would say 964 00:36:50,929 --> 00:36:53,489 just to remember that it's them, not you. 965 00:36:53,489 --> 00:36:53,989 Classic 966 00:36:54,929 --> 00:36:58,230 classic breakup advice. It's them, not you. 967 00:36:58,609 --> 00:37:00,105 It is the system. 968 00:37:01,605 --> 00:37:02,105 And 969 00:37:02,405 --> 00:37:04,485 I would also add on as a mental 970 00:37:04,485 --> 00:37:06,905 health therapist that no degree, 971 00:37:07,525 --> 00:37:09,305 no job is worth 972 00:37:10,405 --> 00:37:11,305 your well-being. 973 00:37:11,844 --> 00:37:13,765 That's a hard one even for me. That 974 00:37:13,765 --> 00:37:15,339 is a hard one for Jess. She She 975 00:37:15,339 --> 00:37:17,099 didn't listen to it in grad school, and 976 00:37:17,099 --> 00:37:17,920 that's fine. 977 00:37:18,460 --> 00:37:20,059 But she found out the hard way on 978 00:37:20,059 --> 00:37:22,539 the other side when it took a toll 979 00:37:22,539 --> 00:37:23,359 on her body. 980 00:37:24,699 --> 00:37:27,585 And I I believe that. I believe that 981 00:37:28,065 --> 00:37:29,045 nothing is worth 982 00:37:29,425 --> 00:37:31,445 nothing is more important than your well-being, 983 00:37:32,144 --> 00:37:33,605 the job, the degree. 984 00:37:34,144 --> 00:37:36,244 So if it's not serving you, 985 00:37:36,784 --> 00:37:38,324 you're not a tree. Move. 986 00:37:38,625 --> 00:37:39,125 Oh, 987 00:37:41,579 --> 00:37:42,880 you're not stuck anywhere. 988 00:37:44,139 --> 00:37:45,519 The system is designed 989 00:37:47,099 --> 00:37:49,039 to make you feel isolated. 990 00:37:49,900 --> 00:37:51,119 Talk to me about that. 991 00:37:51,579 --> 00:37:53,440 How is it designed in that way? 992 00:37:54,299 --> 00:37:55,039 The system, 993 00:37:55,704 --> 00:37:56,204 all 994 00:37:56,744 --> 00:37:58,204 systems, were designed 995 00:37:58,824 --> 00:37:59,885 by white men, 996 00:38:01,144 --> 00:38:02,125 colonial systems. 997 00:38:04,105 --> 00:38:04,605 And 998 00:38:05,224 --> 00:38:07,484 I don't believe that colonial systems 999 00:38:07,864 --> 00:38:08,364 want 1000 00:38:08,829 --> 00:38:11,150 black and brown queer folks, anything that is 1001 00:38:11,150 --> 00:38:11,650 different, 1002 00:38:12,190 --> 00:38:14,750 working in those systems. Because as we saw 1003 00:38:14,750 --> 00:38:17,469 with Pure Quest, when we have these folks 1004 00:38:17,469 --> 00:38:20,269 come together, oh, we get new ideas. Oh, 1005 00:38:20,269 --> 00:38:21,250 we get innovation. 1006 00:38:22,175 --> 00:38:24,414 Oh, we're gonna be like, you're not gonna 1007 00:38:24,414 --> 00:38:25,954 push us around. Mhmm. 1008 00:38:26,414 --> 00:38:28,755 There is so much power 1009 00:38:29,054 --> 00:38:31,954 in community. But if you keep us siloed, 1010 00:38:32,734 --> 00:38:34,594 the system wants us siloed. 1011 00:38:34,989 --> 00:38:37,570 Because when we come together, when we realize 1012 00:38:37,710 --> 00:38:40,190 that we are not each other's enemies, that 1013 00:38:40,190 --> 00:38:41,010 we're actually 1014 00:38:41,950 --> 00:38:42,450 our 1015 00:38:43,070 --> 00:38:45,250 sisters, brothers, people's keepers, 1016 00:38:45,950 --> 00:38:47,250 then we link arms, 1017 00:38:47,885 --> 00:38:50,204 and and then they're scared and then they're 1018 00:38:50,204 --> 00:38:50,704 scared. 1019 00:38:51,085 --> 00:38:53,105 Right? Because now we're together. 1020 00:38:53,405 --> 00:38:55,744 Mhmm. But so long as we're siloed, 1021 00:38:56,925 --> 00:38:58,385 we stay feeling crazy, 1022 00:38:58,925 --> 00:39:01,619 and we stay feeling like we are not 1023 00:39:01,619 --> 00:39:04,900 welcome. Yeah. Like, it's our problem. Like, we're 1024 00:39:04,900 --> 00:39:08,179 the problem. That's that's it. Right? Like, once 1025 00:39:08,179 --> 00:39:09,799 you start having the conversation 1026 00:39:10,339 --> 00:39:12,819 with somebody that looks like you, that's going 1027 00:39:12,819 --> 00:39:15,284 through the same journey, and you start seeing 1028 00:39:15,284 --> 00:39:16,264 these, like, 1029 00:39:16,804 --> 00:39:19,125 the the same things that you went through, 1030 00:39:19,125 --> 00:39:20,344 they went through too. 1031 00:39:20,644 --> 00:39:22,184 Now it's like, okay. Well, 1032 00:39:22,644 --> 00:39:23,945 it wasn't my fault. 1033 00:39:24,324 --> 00:39:27,684 Like, this person across the country in a 1034 00:39:27,684 --> 00:39:28,984 different physics department 1035 00:39:29,460 --> 00:39:31,079 dealt with the same 1036 00:39:31,780 --> 00:39:33,559 issues, the same barriers, 1037 00:39:34,340 --> 00:39:35,000 the same, 1038 00:39:37,619 --> 00:39:38,119 traumas 1039 00:39:38,579 --> 00:39:39,639 that I did. 1040 00:39:39,940 --> 00:39:41,940 Now now it's not a it's not a 1041 00:39:41,940 --> 00:39:42,440 coincidence. 1042 00:39:42,820 --> 00:39:45,914 Sorry. It's a trend. Mhmm. It's not a 1043 00:39:45,914 --> 00:39:48,175 me problem. It's a you problem. Yeah. 1044 00:39:50,074 --> 00:39:50,974 Yeah. And 1045 00:39:51,355 --> 00:39:54,335 so long as the system keeps us focused 1046 00:39:55,035 --> 00:39:57,994 and siloed on believing it is our problem, 1047 00:39:57,994 --> 00:39:59,454 everything is our fault, 1048 00:39:59,789 --> 00:40:01,809 Guess what? We don't succeed because 1049 00:40:02,429 --> 00:40:04,829 all we're doing in our spare time is 1050 00:40:04,829 --> 00:40:07,969 spending so much time and energy and resources 1051 00:40:08,190 --> 00:40:09,410 and mental capacity 1052 00:40:10,030 --> 00:40:12,190 figuring out why the teacher looked at me 1053 00:40:12,190 --> 00:40:14,835 like like that. Why did the teacher ask 1054 00:40:14,994 --> 00:40:17,315 only me why I haven't been in class 1055 00:40:17,315 --> 00:40:17,974 for weeks 1056 00:40:18,275 --> 00:40:20,195 when maybe I have been in class every 1057 00:40:20,195 --> 00:40:22,074 single week, but they didn't see me Mhmm. 1058 00:40:22,275 --> 00:40:25,014 Because I didn't raise my hand? Or, like, 1059 00:40:25,554 --> 00:40:28,375 the system keeps us in our head believing 1060 00:40:28,434 --> 00:40:29,974 we have done something wrong. 1061 00:40:30,570 --> 00:40:31,070 Yeah. 1062 00:40:31,450 --> 00:40:34,030 And when you're spending all that mental capacity 1063 00:40:34,250 --> 00:40:34,989 on anxious 1064 00:40:36,650 --> 00:40:37,630 thoughts about 1065 00:40:38,010 --> 00:40:40,010 why shouldn't be here. What did I do? 1066 00:40:40,010 --> 00:40:41,710 What did I was I too aggressive? 1067 00:40:42,010 --> 00:40:43,869 You don't have enough space 1068 00:40:44,675 --> 00:40:45,335 to innovate, 1069 00:40:45,795 --> 00:40:46,775 to be creative, 1070 00:40:47,155 --> 00:40:49,875 to see the world in Rubik's cube quantum 1071 00:40:49,875 --> 00:40:51,094 mechanics. Like 1072 00:40:51,394 --> 00:40:52,215 and and 1073 00:40:54,275 --> 00:40:55,494 and I say that 1074 00:40:55,954 --> 00:40:56,855 knowing that 1075 00:41:00,480 --> 00:41:02,960 we, as black and brown people, are still 1076 00:41:02,960 --> 00:41:03,279 so 1077 00:41:04,000 --> 00:41:05,059 I almost cussed. 1078 00:41:05,359 --> 00:41:05,859 Freaking 1079 00:41:06,480 --> 00:41:08,179 resilient in these spaces. 1080 00:41:08,559 --> 00:41:09,619 We are still 1081 00:41:11,234 --> 00:41:11,734 innovating 1082 00:41:12,194 --> 00:41:15,875 and driving change and creating new systems and 1083 00:41:15,875 --> 00:41:17,174 and ways of being. 1084 00:41:17,554 --> 00:41:18,454 Just imagine 1085 00:41:19,554 --> 00:41:21,734 if we didn't have to deal with 1086 00:41:22,194 --> 00:41:22,980 this white 1087 00:41:23,380 --> 00:41:23,880 capitalist 1088 00:41:24,260 --> 00:41:24,760 system 1089 00:41:25,380 --> 00:41:26,760 overbearing on us. 1090 00:41:27,300 --> 00:41:27,800 Right? 1091 00:41:28,099 --> 00:41:29,159 Like, woah. 1092 00:41:29,940 --> 00:41:30,440 Yep. 1093 00:41:31,539 --> 00:41:33,059 Yeah. I I see I'm I'm 1094 00:41:33,780 --> 00:41:35,859 it's tempting to think it would be really 1095 00:41:35,859 --> 00:41:37,300 nice if there was a world where you 1096 00:41:37,300 --> 00:41:39,155 didn't have to have QueerQuest. 1097 00:41:39,454 --> 00:41:41,054 But that would be a real shame because 1098 00:41:41,054 --> 00:41:42,835 you wouldn't have all of this collaboration. 1099 00:41:44,494 --> 00:41:46,494 I don't believe that. I just think it 1100 00:41:46,494 --> 00:41:49,054 would be different. Like, the need would be 1101 00:41:49,054 --> 00:41:51,554 different. Yeah. It wouldn't be to escape. 1102 00:41:52,690 --> 00:41:54,309 It wouldn't it would be to come together. 1103 00:41:55,010 --> 00:41:55,510 That's 1104 00:41:55,809 --> 00:41:58,210 true. Was, but the the framing, the jumping 1105 00:41:58,210 --> 00:42:00,390 off point would be different. Yeah. Yeah. 1106 00:42:01,650 --> 00:42:02,150 Brilliant. 1107 00:42:02,690 --> 00:42:04,784 What what's next for Queer Quest? Does it 1108 00:42:04,784 --> 00:42:06,405 come back? Are you doing it again? 1109 00:42:08,385 --> 00:42:10,405 Em's not ready. I'm not ready. 1110 00:42:11,824 --> 00:42:12,885 It's coming back. 1111 00:42:14,864 --> 00:42:17,684 There will be a Queer Quest to the 1112 00:42:17,930 --> 00:42:19,789 year two. The timing 1113 00:42:20,090 --> 00:42:20,590 is 1114 00:42:20,890 --> 00:42:23,690 we will have to discuss that. People also 1115 00:42:23,690 --> 00:42:25,849 asked us at the event, will we be 1116 00:42:25,849 --> 00:42:27,390 taking the show on the road? 1117 00:42:29,450 --> 00:42:31,755 And that's probably not gonna happen 1118 00:42:32,215 --> 00:42:34,614 quite yet. Yeah. We gotta do it do 1119 00:42:34,614 --> 00:42:37,735 it in Chicago. Do it with Chicago, our 1120 00:42:37,735 --> 00:42:38,235 city. 1121 00:42:38,855 --> 00:42:41,094 Make sure we we got it all all 1122 00:42:41,094 --> 00:42:43,735 the kinks ironed out, and then maybe This 1123 00:42:43,735 --> 00:42:46,289 is where we wanna build our community. Yeah. 1124 00:42:46,289 --> 00:42:48,150 Then it can go forth from there. 1125 00:42:48,450 --> 00:42:48,950 But 1126 00:42:49,329 --> 00:42:51,250 Chicago showed up for us, and we're gonna 1127 00:42:51,250 --> 00:42:53,769 show up for Chicago next next year Mhmm. 1128 00:42:53,890 --> 00:42:54,789 The year after. 1129 00:42:55,250 --> 00:42:57,650 But if if people were sort of thinking, 1130 00:42:57,650 --> 00:42:59,090 oh, we we if we had that in 1131 00:42:59,090 --> 00:43:01,105 our town, would would you be happy talk 1132 00:43:01,105 --> 00:43:02,224 to people if they wanted to get in 1133 00:43:02,224 --> 00:43:03,505 touch with you and and talk to them 1134 00:43:03,505 --> 00:43:04,005 about 1135 00:43:04,945 --> 00:43:05,684 it? Absolutely. 1136 00:43:06,305 --> 00:43:08,785 Yeah. Because these spaces are needed. And one 1137 00:43:08,785 --> 00:43:11,045 of the things that we learned at QueerQuest 1138 00:43:11,265 --> 00:43:11,765 is 1139 00:43:12,224 --> 00:43:14,840 every single person has the power to build 1140 00:43:14,840 --> 00:43:16,679 a community. Mhmm. It doesn't have to be 1141 00:43:16,679 --> 00:43:19,420 on the scale of QueerQuest because I'm 1142 00:43:19,880 --> 00:43:20,380 crazy. 1143 00:43:20,920 --> 00:43:23,599 And my vision like, I'm a crazy visionary. 1144 00:43:23,960 --> 00:43:27,239 Visionary. I I I have a specific way 1145 00:43:27,239 --> 00:43:28,699 of things that I want 1146 00:43:29,324 --> 00:43:31,744 to create and anyways, it doesn't matter. 1147 00:43:33,484 --> 00:43:36,284 But a group chat. I mean, we have 1148 00:43:36,284 --> 00:43:39,164 a group chat, and it's soul filling. Just 1149 00:43:39,164 --> 00:43:41,324 being able to have that space where we 1150 00:43:41,324 --> 00:43:41,824 can 1151 00:43:43,030 --> 00:43:45,909 build community is It really just takes the 1152 00:43:45,909 --> 00:43:48,230 intention, the desire to do it, and then 1153 00:43:48,230 --> 00:43:48,809 the intention 1154 00:43:49,109 --> 00:43:51,349 to to bring it to life. Yep. Yep. 1155 00:43:51,349 --> 00:43:53,130 We're happy to have that conversation. 1156 00:43:53,589 --> 00:43:55,049 A 100%. Yeah. 1157 00:43:55,394 --> 00:43:56,675 If you would like to get in touch 1158 00:43:56,675 --> 00:43:58,675 with Jessica and Emily about that and maybe 1159 00:43:58,675 --> 00:44:00,675 see if they can help you arrange a 1160 00:44:00,675 --> 00:44:02,755 similar sort of event where you are, then 1161 00:44:02,755 --> 00:44:04,355 you can get in touch with them via 1162 00:44:04,355 --> 00:44:06,914 the iNova website or indeed the Quick West 1163 00:44:06,914 --> 00:44:08,690 website. I'd like to thank them both for 1164 00:44:08,690 --> 00:44:10,609 joining me for this episode of the Physics 1165 00:44:10,609 --> 00:44:12,690 World Stories podcast. If you'd like to hear 1166 00:44:12,690 --> 00:44:14,369 more from Jessica, and I don't know why 1167 00:44:14,369 --> 00:44:16,769 you wouldn't, then I would recommend going back 1168 00:44:16,769 --> 00:44:19,089 to the previous conversation we had on this 1169 00:44:19,089 --> 00:44:19,589 podcast 1170 00:44:19,969 --> 00:44:22,449 all about the muon mania. I'll post a 1171 00:44:22,449 --> 00:44:24,795 link to that, of course, on the Physics 1172 00:44:24,795 --> 00:44:28,414 World website alongside the article with this episode. 1173 00:44:28,875 --> 00:44:31,114 And if this has whetted your appetite for 1174 00:44:31,114 --> 00:44:33,835 even more quantum science and technology, this is, 1175 00:44:33,835 --> 00:44:36,480 of course, the international year of just that. 1176 00:44:36,719 --> 00:44:38,420 And at Physics World, we have a smorgasbord 1177 00:44:38,880 --> 00:44:41,219 of coverage spanning the history, mystery, 1178 00:44:41,519 --> 00:44:44,320 and industry of quantum mechanics. We'll be back 1179 00:44:44,320 --> 00:44:46,320 next month with something else from this wonderful 1180 00:44:46,320 --> 00:44:48,719 world of physics, and thank you very much 1181 00:44:48,719 --> 00:44:49,460 for listening.