Forever a free spirit…. From shy little girl to international ex-pat

Darrell Snow
00:00:07
Hey.
Darrell Snow
00:00:07
Welcome back to another episode of A Warrior Spirit, the show where the inner warrior shines in their light.
Darrell Snow
00:00:12
Presented by Praxis33, the company that aligns your thoughts, goals and actions to create your best life.
Darrell Snow
00:00:18
I'm your host, Darrell Snow, and today we're going to be talking about love.
Darrell Snow
00:00:22
We're going to be talking about how to keep the honeymoon phase active in your relationship.
Darrell Snow
00:00:27
And we're also going to be talking about helping females with release stress and reconnect with their bodies.
Darrell Snow
00:00:34
And today to do that, I have Lexi Davis.
Darrell Snow
00:00:38
Lexi is a love embodiment coach and she's coming to us today from Lisbon.
Darrell Snow
00:00:43
So, Lexi, I appreciate your time and welcome to the show.
Lexi Davis
00:00:47
Thank you.
Lexi Davis
00:00:48
So happy to be here.
Darrell Snow
00:00:50
You're currently coming from Lisbon, but that isn't where you got your start.
Darrell Snow
00:00:54
Actually.
Darrell Snow
00:00:55
You're kind of a world world traveler and lived in lots of places.
Darrell Snow
00:00:58
Where did you actually grow up?
Lexi Davis
00:01:00
I grew up in Seattle, Washington and was born in New York.
Lexi Davis
00:01:05
And then since then I've lived a lot of different places.
Darrell Snow
00:01:09
So, I mean, you're fairly young and for someone to be the world traveler that you are, what, what, what got you into exploration like that?
Lexi Davis
00:01:20
Well, I think one of not so common is that we didn't travel when I was a kid and all my friends around me were traveling.
Lexi Davis
00:01:27
And then when I got to college, I chose to study abroad and I went to New Zealand.
Lexi Davis
00:01:34
And from there it was game over.
Lexi Davis
00:01:35
I couldn't stop.
Lexi Davis
00:01:36
So once I got to New Zealand, I knew that as soon as I finished college, I had to go live somewhere else.
Lexi Davis
00:01:43
And so I moved to Australia and lived there for two years.
Lexi Davis
00:01:45
And since then I barely lived in America just because I really like exploring the world.
Darrell Snow
00:01:51
Well, it's a big world out there and you know, to.
Darrell Snow
00:01:55
What, what was your college degree in?
Lexi Davis
00:01:58
Care, health and society?
Lexi Davis
00:01:59
It was a sociology degree and then a minor in psychology.
Darrell Snow
00:02:03
Okay, so how does someone go from the U of A?
Darrell Snow
00:02:07
Because you told me you were in Arizona and I know you, you decided to study abroad.
Darrell Snow
00:02:12
And once you do leave the US and see the rest of the world, it is really easy to catch that bug.
Darrell Snow
00:02:19
But how do you go into being a love embodiment coach and also a feminine embodiment coach who helps females, you know, reconnect with their body?
Lexi Davis
00:02:31
Well, it wasn't a linear journey.
Lexi Davis
00:02:33
I just, since I was young, I grew up with a.
Lexi Davis
00:02:36
I grew up with a single dad, which isn't a typical story.
Lexi Davis
00:02:39
And so I had to grow up really quick, really young, and I was an only child, and I lack that mother figure.
Lexi Davis
00:02:45
And so I really became kind of a mother to myself and to everyone else in my life.
Lexi Davis
00:02:51
And from there, I just got really curious about building connections because I felt so alone.
Lexi Davis
00:02:56
So in school, I started to deepen my relationships with more people, and I noticed how similar all of us are.
Lexi Davis
00:03:02
And then once I traveled, I saw people from other side of the world with the same problems.
Lexi Davis
00:03:07
And I was really curious, and how is this possible when we're all so different?
Lexi Davis
00:03:11
And yet when you boil it down, we really carry such similar issues that we're facing.
Lexi Davis
00:03:16
And from there, I.
Lexi Davis
00:03:18
When I moved to Australia, I got into yoga, and that's when I learned about trauma.
Lexi Davis
00:03:23
And that really opened up my eyes.
Lexi Davis
00:03:25
And then I got introduced to the nervous system world, and it just impacted me so greatly that I knew I had to share.
Lexi Davis
00:03:33
And I also lost two friends to suicide when they were only like 21, 22 years old.
Lexi Davis
00:03:39
And I lost a few other people to mental health issues.
Lexi Davis
00:03:44
And so that also highlighted the problem we have with being vulnerable and the truth that we're facing and the issues we're going through.
Lexi Davis
00:03:52
So I knew that I didn't want to go in the corporate world and that I needed to do something in this field around community and connection.
Lexi Davis
00:03:59
And it just slowly came together.
Lexi Davis
00:04:01
I left Australia.
Lexi Davis
00:04:03
The last thing I did was volunteer at a holistic health retreat.
Lexi Davis
00:04:06
And my roommate was this gorgeous woman, Daisy, and she was a life coach.
Lexi Davis
00:04:10
And she was telling me what she does.
Lexi Davis
00:04:11
And I was blown away because I realized that's what I'm doing every day for my friends anyway, so why don't I do this?
Lexi Davis
00:04:17
And that's kind of where the journey started.
Lexi Davis
00:04:19
And I've just always been obsessed with love and think it's the most beautiful gift of this life.
Lexi Davis
00:04:24
And so I knew that I wanted to help people with that.
Lexi Davis
00:04:28
And so I really just started learning so much about love, and now it excites me a lot.
Lexi Davis
00:04:33
And with that, when I lived in Bali, I started to learn more about embodiment and how the body impacts us and how so much is stored in our body and not just our mind.
Lexi Davis
00:04:44
And I started to see ridiculous, like, immense, beautiful results from doing this body work that I wanted to share it with more women.
Lexi Davis
00:04:52
And it's just been.
Lexi Davis
00:04:54
I've seen the impact on my clients, and it's so beautiful.
Lexi Davis
00:04:58
So I also added that into the field, and it's just been amazing.
Lexi Davis
00:05:02
Like, I just love to help people and.
Darrell Snow
00:05:04
Yeah, well, you started off, you know, you Said that you were a single child with.
Darrell Snow
00:05:12
Grew up with your father, which.
Darrell Snow
00:05:15
That dichotomy in and of itself is kind of unique.
Darrell Snow
00:05:20
How did that impact you as a child growing up?
Darrell Snow
00:05:24
I have sisters, and I've helped plenty of female clients.
Darrell Snow
00:05:28
I understand the hardship and the trauma that being just a female young adult in and of itself brings oftentimes.
Darrell Snow
00:05:40
I also understand how cruel children can be oftentimes, especially women, they can be kind of catty.
Darrell Snow
00:05:48
And having a degree in psychology as well, I'm always fascinated by the human brain.
Darrell Snow
00:05:53
So how did your upbringing affect you as a young girl?
Lexi Davis
00:06:00
In so many ways, I was very shy, very quiet.
Lexi Davis
00:06:04
I was super reserved.
Lexi Davis
00:06:06
I was just, like, so confused at the world.
Lexi Davis
00:06:10
I thought I was the problem that my mom left.
Lexi Davis
00:06:13
And then my dad also suffers from bipolar, so I was always walking on eggshells.
Lexi Davis
00:06:18
And so I didn't really speak much.
Lexi Davis
00:06:20
And I know how to listen really well.
Lexi Davis
00:06:23
But, like, talking was really hard for me because I always was scared to say the wrong thing.
Lexi Davis
00:06:27
And then my dad would yell, even though he never meant to.
Lexi Davis
00:06:29
But, yeah, there was that element.
Lexi Davis
00:06:32
And then I had this deep fear without knowing, of abandonment.
Lexi Davis
00:06:35
And so I was actually scared to get close to people.
Lexi Davis
00:06:37
Yeah, that's what I desired so immensely because I never had that, like, nurturing motherly figure in my life.
Lexi Davis
00:06:44
Although my mom is present in my life now, and we have a beautiful relationship, but she wasn't attentive when I was young and so lacking that.
Lexi Davis
00:06:52
That.
Lexi Davis
00:06:53
That sweet, soft energy as a child.
Lexi Davis
00:06:56
It just.
Lexi Davis
00:06:56
It did make me.
Lexi Davis
00:06:57
I mean, I was still pretty cutie, sweetie, but I also had this huge protection around me, this huge hard shell around my heart.
Lexi Davis
00:07:04
And I used to be super blunt and a little bit too direct, and I just didn't have that softness in me because I was never demonstrated it.
Lexi Davis
00:07:12
So, yeah, it shaped me in a lot of ways.
Lexi Davis
00:07:15
But I would say those are the main ones.
Darrell Snow
00:07:17
It's amazing that you say that, because if anyone is to watch you online or connect with you at your retreats or as a coach.
Darrell Snow
00:07:27
Now, obviously, social media and what people see is only a part of the story, obviously.
Darrell Snow
00:07:35
But if anyone were to ever connect with you in any fashion, all they see is an outgoing, loving, joyous person.
Darrell Snow
00:07:45
And to overcome what you did in your childhood, you have a choice.
Darrell Snow
00:07:51
You can either stay hard or you can find ways to soften that.
Darrell Snow
00:07:58
What was the catalyst for you to choose the path of softness?
Lexi Davis
00:08:04
Yeah, it's definitely a choice.
Lexi Davis
00:08:06
I mean, I truly feel like it was something inside me because When I think about what was happening back then, I just had this deep curiosity for life, I think.
Lexi Davis
00:08:15
And I just knew somewhere inside me, I really can't describe it, that there had to be more than what I was given.
Lexi Davis
00:08:20
And you know, I did see some things role modeled through some of my friends, parents, relationships and a little taste of different things that I experienced that I was like, okay, if that's out there in the world, somehow it must be possible for me to access myself.
Lexi Davis
00:08:35
And with, you know, there's always a almost positive side of trauma.
Lexi Davis
00:08:39
With my mom leaving so young and my dad being an only child, my dad working a lot, I had to grow up super fast.
Lexi Davis
00:08:46
And with that, that meant I.
Lexi Davis
00:08:48
I take action.
Lexi Davis
00:08:48
I know if I need something or want something, I need to do it for myself.
Lexi Davis
00:08:52
So with that energy, it kind of shaped me in my ability to go after the things and to stay really curious and to make things happen.
Lexi Davis
00:09:01
Because if I weren't to make it happen, it wasn't going to happen in my life.
Lexi Davis
00:09:03
So that's where the good side of my trauma came in.
Lexi Davis
00:09:07
And I know that doesn't happen for everyone with trauma, but that's just what happened for me.
Darrell Snow
00:09:11
Yeah, you.
Darrell Snow
00:09:13
I.
Darrell Snow
00:09:14
My son went to Tacoma for culinary to after he finished culinary school here in Arizona.
Darrell Snow
00:09:21
And so we visited the Seattle area.
Darrell Snow
00:09:26
It is not what I would call the easiest of places to grow up.
Darrell Snow
00:09:31
Yeah.
Darrell Snow
00:09:32
What was your childhood?
Darrell Snow
00:09:33
What was your experience as someone trying to find her way in that environment?
Lexi Davis
00:09:39
It was hard.
Lexi Davis
00:09:39
I mean the weather itself, like since I found the sunshine after I was able to have the freedom to started in Arizona with college.
Lexi Davis
00:09:48
I have never like besides now in Lisbon, gone back to the cold weather because it just is invigorating.
Lexi Davis
00:09:53
Like the sun is the best feeling ever.
Lexi Davis
00:09:56
So yeah, it was hard and I wasn't even aware of it at the time because I just thought that was normal to feel, you know, this heaviness and density because the weather is so effective of that.
Lexi Davis
00:10:06
And also there's this thing called the Seattle Freeze where people are very cold and not so friendly.
Lexi Davis
00:10:13
Like when you walk on the street, not everyone's saying hi and welcoming you and there's not this warm energy.
Lexi Davis
00:10:18
And I think that has to once again kind of do with the weather.
Lexi Davis
00:10:20
And it's also become a very large tech city or Amazon, Boeing, Google, there's all these huge offices there.
Lexi Davis
00:10:28
So yeah, it, it was hard because after I left, even like coming back to Seattle, I left when I came back from Australia, came home and I was so Excited and it was just like I was not connecting with anyone did not feel good there.
Lexi Davis
00:10:42
I just felt really isolated, isolating and really hard, like very lonely.
Darrell Snow
00:10:48
And again, that speaks a lot to who you are to overcome.
Darrell Snow
00:10:53
I mean, you overcame the environment, you overcame the house situation, and you chose to help others embrace who they are.
Darrell Snow
00:11:03
And I know you work a lot with women.
Darrell Snow
00:11:06
I've seen photographs and videos of your retreats and there's such love and energy in the room.
Darrell Snow
00:11:17
Like, how did, how did you bring that out and help others to embrace that?
Darrell Snow
00:11:23
Because I know just from watching your retreats or just seeing the videos.
Darrell Snow
00:11:31
For women to step into their femininity, and again, I've interviewed enough women and worked with them in my coaching business.
Darrell Snow
00:11:38
For women to step into their femininity and embrace that part of themselves is not an easy journey for many.
Darrell Snow
00:11:45
So how do, how do you work with that to get them to that level that is shown online?
Lexi Davis
00:11:53
Yeah, that's a good question.
Lexi Davis
00:11:54
So I had to find it within myself and it really happened through relationships and it especially happened when I lived in Australia.
Lexi Davis
00:12:01
I was gifted the most amazing woman of all ages that just came into my life and loved me in a way that I've never been loved before and showed me what it's like to be loved, especially by a stranger and who instantly became family.
Lexi Davis
00:12:16
And that ingrained something so deep into my body that let me access this level of love.
Lexi Davis
00:12:21
And then obviously I was able to start to resource it for myself.
Lexi Davis
00:12:25
And from there I got really good at building connections and community and I started to recognize, oh, it's actually so quick.
Lexi Davis
00:12:33
It's so easy to build a deep connection quickly.
Lexi Davis
00:12:36
It just takes me leading with openness and trust.
Lexi Davis
00:12:40
And most people, we lead with a guarded heart.
Lexi Davis
00:12:42
So when I'm there just being fully authentic, fully vulnerable, fully open and sharing myself, that softens other people to do the same and to feel the safety of that non judgment.
Lexi Davis
00:12:55
That's also something I'm really big on, is releasing judgment and shame.
Lexi Davis
00:12:58
And it's something that's really felt like.
Lexi Davis
00:13:01
I'm sure we've all experienced it.
Lexi Davis
00:13:02
When you meet someone and all of a sudden you're just like pouring out your heart.
Lexi Davis
00:13:05
You feel really safe to share everything with them and you meet someone else and you're just super in your mind, you're very anxious, you don't feel comfortable, and it really comes down to an embodiment piece.
Lexi Davis
00:13:14
So during my events, I carry this energy of like, I have felt it all, I have gone to the depths of every emotion, every feeling I have heard every crazy story.
Lexi Davis
00:13:25
There is nothing that is too much that you could share with me that would ever make me judge you or make me feel like you're too much or something that I was, like, appalled that you just.
Lexi Davis
00:13:34
There's no such thing as embarrassment in my space.
Lexi Davis
00:13:36
And of course, I don't even have to say that half the times, but it's just the energy I feel because I've really gone there within myself.
Lexi Davis
00:13:44
And then I lead with that, with vulnerability.
Lexi Davis
00:13:47
I lead with these stories and these my experiences, and I connect people immediately.
Lexi Davis
00:13:53
Something that I find most group spaces don't do is bring connection into the group.
Lexi Davis
00:13:58
So, like, I'm immediately connecting the girls, having them do deep exercises, intimacy exercises together.
Lexi Davis
00:14:05
And this just allows us to see, like, how human we all are.
Lexi Davis
00:14:08
And I break that from the beginning because once we realize, okay, we're all facing the similar problems, then we all feel comfortable to be ourselves and to soften once we know it is safe that, like, we're not the odd one out or the black sheep anymore or all these, you know, stories we carry within ourselves.
Darrell Snow
00:14:25
A friend of mine and I.
Darrell Snow
00:14:27
What you do is a beautiful thing and it's a great gift to give to others.
Darrell Snow
00:14:32
A friend of mine studied over in Thailand and she does Thai massage.
Darrell Snow
00:14:37
And she always talks about how we carry issues in our tissues.
Darrell Snow
00:14:42
And by doing these releases, it releases that trauma from your body.
Darrell Snow
00:14:48
And I've seen it up close and personal.
Darrell Snow
00:14:51
I've seen it done.
Darrell Snow
00:14:54
So I truly believe I've seen people who have released that trauma, who are suddenly physically softer people, transformative in their face and their eyes and their expression.
Darrell Snow
00:15:11
How is the Samanic yoga that you do similar to the Thai massage that she does?
Lexi Davis
00:15:22
So it's somatic and all somatic means it's okay.
Lexi Davis
00:15:26
So all somatic means is body based.
Lexi Davis
00:15:28
So it's being and discovering through your body.
Lexi Davis
00:15:31
And so it's kind of like that's the big umbrella and everything falls under that breath.
Lexi Davis
00:15:35
Work, yoga, massage, all things can be elements of that somatic work.
Lexi Davis
00:15:41
And there's so many different ways to access it, but the main point is being connected to your body.
Lexi Davis
00:15:46
And with that, you can start to uncover so much.
Lexi Davis
00:15:50
Like it first happened to me in a yoga class where the teacher was like, stay in this pose and breathe.
Lexi Davis
00:15:57
And I wanted to scream at her.
Lexi Davis
00:15:59
I was so annoyed.
Lexi Davis
00:16:00
I'm like, are you joking me?
Lexi Davis
00:16:01
We've sat in this pose for so long.
Lexi Davis
00:16:03
Like, we do not need to stay here longer.
Lexi Davis
00:16:05
And I felt all the frustration and I was like, you know what?
Lexi Davis
00:16:07
Fine, I'll take one more breath.
Lexi Davis
00:16:09
And as soon as I did that, I just started bawling, crying, and I was releasing.
Lexi Davis
00:16:14
And I'm like, why am I releasing this yoga class?
Lexi Davis
00:16:16
And I was confused and I was like, okay, I'm just going to surrender into this.
Lexi Davis
00:16:19
Like, I heard other people experiencing things.
Lexi Davis
00:16:21
And then I checked my phone and a year to the from that day is a year I was in this crazy car accident.
Lexi Davis
00:16:28
So I was like, whoa, there is something there.
Lexi Davis
00:16:31
My body is clearly storing things.
Lexi Davis
00:16:33
And then I, you know, read the Body Keeps Score and there's so many other books, but I just started to experience through the nervous system.
Lexi Davis
00:16:39
I started to understand that what all that trauma is is too much, too soon, too fast.
Lexi Davis
00:16:44
So to unwind that and to undo it, you have to slow down and connect to your body and allow your system to experience the sensations which are the physical feelings in the body to the fullest degree.
Lexi Davis
00:16:59
And when you do that, it eliminates them.
Lexi Davis
00:17:00
It allows them to transmute and transform.
Lexi Davis
00:17:03
And all of a sudden you're releasing these things that you're just carrying and signs of carrying that are of, of having your body store emotions are through tension, tightness.
Lexi Davis
00:17:13
You know, there's all these ways that the body is talking to us, but we don't understand the language of the body.
Darrell Snow
00:17:19
And it is different in each person and it holds its space in each person.
Darrell Snow
00:17:25
And so as you're in this group session, how are you not a one size fits all?
Darrell Snow
00:17:33
Because you're not.
Darrell Snow
00:17:35
But how do you differentiate that for people?
Lexi Davis
00:17:40
Well, I'm teaching them to, like, I kind of just touched on.
Lexi Davis
00:17:43
I'm teaching them to learn the language of their body.
Lexi Davis
00:17:46
I'm teaching them to get curious about what's happening in their body.
Lexi Davis
00:17:49
And I guide them into their own bodies and things start to come up in different shapes and forms for everyone.
Lexi Davis
00:17:55
But there's always usually something inside of everyone.
Lexi Davis
00:17:58
So I'm able to show them by building that relationship with their own bodies and guide them through with several different kinds of tools and exercises to access different sensations and releases.
Lexi Davis
00:18:13
And sometimes I also take them through my somatic embodiment flow, which is I break down each emotion so we can feel it by its own.
Lexi Davis
00:18:24
So we can feel anger separate from sadness, which are often entangled.
Lexi Davis
00:18:29
And then we can feel joy.
Lexi Davis
00:18:30
And I take them through this flow that allows them to just feel each emotion separately.
Lexi Davis
00:18:35
And I guide them to access these memories so that they can tap into the feeling of that and express it.
Lexi Davis
00:18:43
And sometimes it's no, not always accessible, depending on how numb you've been or, you know, whatever.
Lexi Davis
00:18:47
There's so much I teach them about that.
Lexi Davis
00:18:49
But then in that it's like, okay, you understand that another thing about the body is you can access the nervous system through imagination.
Lexi Davis
00:18:57
You can think about a time when you were hurt and like you're gonna feel that hurt in your body.
Lexi Davis
00:19:02
It's right there.
Lexi Davis
00:19:03
It's always accessible.
Lexi Davis
00:19:05
So yeah, everyone's needs something different, but at the same time, like guiding them to access those things that are blocking or, you know, in the way.
Lexi Davis
00:19:15
It's pretty easy for us to all drop into that because it's really right at the surface.
Darrell Snow
00:19:21
And when you're working separately at your retreats or your sessions one on one with the females, how is that different from when you're working with a couple?
Darrell Snow
00:19:32
Because you're not only a female embodiment coach, you're, you're a love embodiment coach.
Darrell Snow
00:19:37
And you teach, you know, couples how to keep that honeymoon phase going and, and how to deepen their intimacy and build that trust factor that all relationships need.
Darrell Snow
00:19:50
So again, from a man's point of view, men respond and act a little differently.
Darrell Snow
00:19:56
But deep down we're all looking for the same thing.
Darrell Snow
00:19:59
Love and care.
Darrell Snow
00:20:01
But it's harder for men to bring that emotional side out.
Darrell Snow
00:20:05
So how is it different when you're working with a couple then?
Lexi Davis
00:20:10
Yeah, so in the one to one sessions, it's really beautiful because I can completely customize and personalize it, whether it's just a female coaching client or the couple.
Lexi Davis
00:20:20
And oftentimes I work with the couple individually.
Lexi Davis
00:20:23
So sometimes I do offer like a special couple session where they're both there.
Lexi Davis
00:20:28
But I'm not necessarily like a couples coach.
Lexi Davis
00:20:31
But through teaching the woman or the man different skills, it allows them to have their partner show up in a new way, especially as a woman, to express your emotions without projecting and blaming onto them.
Lexi Davis
00:20:44
That allows the man to really hear you and understand and possibly access some parts of himself that he wasn't able to.
Lexi Davis
00:20:52
And also teaching women how to understand men better so that they can access these parts of themselves.
Lexi Davis
00:20:59
Because men have.
Lexi Davis
00:21:00
Their feelings are way deeper than ours.
Lexi Davis
00:21:02
Like you guys, it's not at the right there at the top.
Lexi Davis
00:21:05
Like for us, we're like so on it.
Lexi Davis
00:21:07
We know what we're feeling.
Lexi Davis
00:21:08
There's so much feeling, feeling, feeling.
Lexi Davis
00:21:09
But that's not the top focus for you guys.
Lexi Davis
00:21:12
And so I teach women to create more space so that the man has time to get to those feelings and also asking him different questions besides his feelings.
Lexi Davis
00:21:21
Because even using words like what is.
Lexi Davis
00:21:24
What are you thinking?
Lexi Davis
00:21:25
Or what does it seem like?
Lexi Davis
00:21:26
Can help because it feels more tangible for you guys versus, like, when you ask them, what do you feel?
Lexi Davis
00:21:32
You guys are like, well, I don't know what I feel.
Lexi Davis
00:21:34
So, yeah, yeah, Just giving the education around that.
Darrell Snow
00:21:39
Well, men, society tend to only allow us to feel anger.
Darrell Snow
00:21:47
They shape us so that the rest of feelings are taboo or put down.
Darrell Snow
00:21:53
And so at a young age, we learn to hide them and bury them and try, you know, deal with them ourselves.
Darrell Snow
00:22:00
And unfortunately, we carry them in awful ways throughout our life.
Darrell Snow
00:22:06
I just went on my own alchemist journey last year, and the things that I thought I had dealt with earlier in life because I had acknowledged them and understood them and, you know, addressed them, was vastly different than actually healing from them and addressing them.
Darrell Snow
00:22:25
And it wasn't until my wife, We've been together 10 years now.
Darrell Snow
00:22:29
It wasn't until she gave me the safe space to be vulnerable, to shed a tear, to show emotion, that I was able to willingly dig deeper, to release the trauma and become more connected with my emotions other than anger.
Darrell Snow
00:22:51
And it does take a lot more work because men need to be heard and understood by their partner.
Darrell Snow
00:23:01
And when we don't, we get frustrated, and that shows up in anger, and we have to learn a whole different way of communicating.
Darrell Snow
00:23:11
And for you to be able to help couples understand that is such a huge service to so many.
Lexi Davis
00:23:20
Yeah, I mean, we just.
Lexi Davis
00:23:21
It's sad.
Lexi Davis
00:23:21
Like, men have just been given such a bad rap, and patriarchy has a huge impact on men.
Lexi Davis
00:23:29
And I think society is always just soothing the woman.
Lexi Davis
00:23:33
And I'm very.
Lexi Davis
00:23:34
I'm not a feminist.
Lexi Davis
00:23:35
I'm very much equal.
Lexi Davis
00:23:36
Like, I think we're both so important, and, yeah, it's like, we don't understand how much pain men have to carry and how much struggle they carry and how much numbness you guys have been carrying your entire lives.
Lexi Davis
00:23:47
And you guys are constantly misunderstood.
Lexi Davis
00:23:50
One of my favorite mentors, Allison Armstrong, always talks about how women treat men like a hairy woman.
Lexi Davis
00:23:56
We are expecting them to show up and talk to us and speak like a woman, yet we want them to be a man.
Lexi Davis
00:24:02
And we're just never understanding their true intentions.
Lexi Davis
00:24:05
We think they're always doing the worst and trying to hurt us.
Lexi Davis
00:24:08
And it's like, no, that you guys are always trying to make us happy and trying to, you know, take care of us.
Lexi Davis
00:24:14
And we just Misinterpret everything because we don't understand how differently we both operate.
Lexi Davis
00:24:19
And it's something I had to learn through experience, through showing up so poorly in relationship and emasculating my partner, my ex, so badly and, like, getting the worst version of him and wondering, okay, why am I bringing out this version of him?
Lexi Davis
00:24:32
And I was like, okay, I gotta.
Lexi Davis
00:24:34
I gotta learn more about men here.
Lexi Davis
00:24:35
And I just went on a deep dive.
Lexi Davis
00:24:37
And then I was fascinated.
Lexi Davis
00:24:38
And I just felt so much shame and so much guilt for all that I did.
Lexi Davis
00:24:43
But it's like, okay, well, this is what it teaches us, and this is how we're role modeled from our moms, how they treat and she treats, you know, blah, blah, blah.
Lexi Davis
00:24:50
So it just felt like part of my mission, you know?
Lexi Davis
00:24:53
And then growing up with a single dad, it's like, I've always loved men.
Lexi Davis
00:24:56
I used to never have girlfriends.
Lexi Davis
00:24:57
I actually used to not like women.
Lexi Davis
00:24:59
So I always had this, like, soft spot for men anyways.
Lexi Davis
00:25:02
But now it's like a whole different perspective on it.
Darrell Snow
00:25:05
It's wonderful that you actually took the time to dive in because we at our core, basically are still all hunter gatherers, and the man is still trying to provide and, you know, do well by his woman and be, quote, unquote, the man of the house.
Darrell Snow
00:25:28
You know, there's still that underlying patriarchal dichotomy, you know, and I love it.
Darrell Snow
00:25:37
Like, in our household, my wife and I, we don't have gender roles like one cooks and one cleans and you do this.
Darrell Snow
00:25:46
No, we do it all as a partnership.
Darrell Snow
00:25:49
But it's taken even 10 years into the relationship, it's taken us a lot of work and effort to learn how to just communicate and not talk to each other, but communicate.
Darrell Snow
00:26:01
So that one of the mistakes that I find that we've made and that I see others make is that we want our partner to respond to us in the way we want responded, and we want to talk to them in our language instead of theirs.
Darrell Snow
00:26:18
And learning that the two love languages and the two response languages are different, and there's a vast difference between hearing and listening.
Lexi Davis
00:26:29
Oh, yeah.
Lexi Davis
00:26:31
Yes.
Lexi Davis
00:26:31
That's something my partner and I are addressing right now.
Lexi Davis
00:26:33
It's.
Lexi Davis
00:26:34
Yeah.
Lexi Davis
00:26:35
How to actually listen.
Lexi Davis
00:26:36
To understand versus listening.
Lexi Davis
00:26:38
To prove your point and remembering that we are on the same team.
Lexi Davis
00:26:42
And when we're both triggered, when any two couples or any humans are triggered going at each other, it is so hard.
Lexi Davis
00:26:49
It is very rarely productive.
Lexi Davis
00:26:52
And it brings out the worst in you.
Lexi Davis
00:26:53
And it's like you, someone has to break the cycle and be responsible and say, we need to pause here and come back to this in a moment.
Lexi Davis
00:27:00
Because, yeah, communication is the most important part of relationships.
Lexi Davis
00:27:05
And it's the hardest because we both are coming.
Lexi Davis
00:27:07
You're trying to combine two separate lives with a whole different experience versus like trauma, communication, all these different things and come together and you're just constantly misunderstanding each other, misinterpreting.
Lexi Davis
00:27:20
And so it's like your needs are not being met.
Lexi Davis
00:27:22
How did you not know I needed this?
Lexi Davis
00:27:23
It's like all these things are combining your lives with someone else.
Lexi Davis
00:27:26
And it takes time.
Lexi Davis
00:27:28
It is not an overnight process.
Lexi Davis
00:27:30
And it really takes.
Lexi Davis
00:27:31
Presence and conflict repair is essential to that never ending honeymoon phase.
Lexi Davis
00:27:37
It's like, you really got to learn how to move through that.
Lexi Davis
00:27:39
Not sweep things under the rug, not avoid it, not have a resolution where you just build the separation and separation and this tension just keeps growing because you're not addressing it.
Lexi Davis
00:27:48
Like, all these things go wrong when we don't clear up the communication.
Lexi Davis
00:27:52
And it's not easy.
Lexi Davis
00:27:53
It is not fun at times, it is disgust.
Lexi Davis
00:27:56
Like, it is so uncomfortable and nobody likes it.
Lexi Davis
00:27:59
Neither partner is enjoying it.
Lexi Davis
00:28:00
But you have to do it.
Lexi Davis
00:28:02
And when you do, that's when the intimacy comes.
Lexi Davis
00:28:04
Like, connection is a portal to intimacy because on the other side it's like, oh, okay, I feel more loved now.
Lexi Davis
00:28:12
Now I understand you better.
Lexi Davis
00:28:13
And it's like, but we forget that in the moment.
Lexi Davis
00:28:15
But yeah, it does.
Darrell Snow
00:28:17
Well, the, the thing that I found in my own personal relationship is that we each try to respond based on how others have responded to the situation with us instead of how our partner is going to respond.
Darrell Snow
00:28:34
Because like you said, they come at it with a whole different set of experiences.
Darrell Snow
00:28:38
And so we preemptively think that that's going to be the same outcome.
Darrell Snow
00:28:42
And so then we're in a fight about something that was never even going to happen and we try to defend our position.
Darrell Snow
00:28:53
So we're answering to defend instead of respond to what was actually being said, which psychologically screws up what we actually heard anyway.
Lexi Davis
00:29:04
Yeah, exactly.
Lexi Davis
00:29:06
It's so it's, it's hard.
Lexi Davis
00:29:08
And in the moments, it's hard to catch it too, because then you're triggered.
Lexi Davis
00:29:12
And then when you feel that, then you're like, it is so hard to stay in your heart and to really just listen.
Lexi Davis
00:29:16
Okay?
Lexi Davis
00:29:17
Right now he's actually bringing up the past, which has nothing to do with me, but he's taking it on to me.
Lexi Davis
00:29:22
So then I'm Feeling, but to like be the bigger person and to call it out in the moment.
Lexi Davis
00:29:26
And it's also their responsibility to say actually hey, so there's so many layers and it's, it's like you said, like it's just not.
Lexi Davis
00:29:33
It takes time and it takes such deep self awareness, reflection.
Lexi Davis
00:29:37
And that's why it's really important if you are listening to this podcast and if you're on this journey, you have to be with someone that is also growth minded.
Lexi Davis
00:29:44
You have to be with someone that is also willing to take responsibility, to have self awareness, to take self accountability and to look at their stuff.
Lexi Davis
00:29:52
Because both of your things are going to come up and relationships are the ultimate mirror.
Lexi Davis
00:29:56
They're going to show you everything you want to see and that you do want to see about yourself.
Lexi Davis
00:30:02
But they also are going to be reflected that too.
Lexi Davis
00:30:04
And if they can't take that responsibility and have that awareness to look at, okay, what's my part in this?
Lexi Davis
00:30:10
Then it's never going to, you're never going to find that resolution and it won't work out long term.
Lexi Davis
00:30:14
I don't believe.
Lexi Davis
00:30:15
Because one person can be doing all the work, it definitely requires both people to be doing that.
Darrell Snow
00:30:20
Absolutely.
Darrell Snow
00:30:21
It has to be a partnership.
Darrell Snow
00:30:23
I tell people all the time love and relationships is not a 50, 50 deal because what if I don't like the 50% you're giving?
Darrell Snow
00:30:34
It has to be a hundred, 100, you know, in effort.
Darrell Snow
00:30:39
And I find oftentimes my wife and I, what one of the things that we're arguing about is who's being nice to the other.
Darrell Snow
00:30:47
Not are you being nice but you're trying to do something for, for your partner.
Darrell Snow
00:30:53
And because of their independence and strong willed nature too, they're not willing to accept that help as love and help.
Darrell Snow
00:31:05
They're accepting it as squashing their independence.
Darrell Snow
00:31:09
And so we find one of our biggest arguments is who's being too nice to the other.
Darrell Snow
00:31:15
And it's been a learning curve to balance the fact that we are on the same team.
Darrell Snow
00:31:20
We are not squashing the other's independence.
Darrell Snow
00:31:24
We just love and care about each other enough to want to help and do stuff, you know, for the other person.
Lexi Davis
00:31:31
Yeah.
Darrell Snow
00:31:31
And I think that comes from the man's society too of always having to be the one to.
Lexi Davis
00:31:38
Oh yeah, the lone wolf.
Lexi Davis
00:31:41
Yeah, the lone wolf archetype for men for sure.
Lexi Davis
00:31:43
And I also had that as a woman, you know, it's not just men or women.
Lexi Davis
00:31:47
I very much was a lone wolf my whole life because I couldn't depend on anyone.
Lexi Davis
00:31:51
Like my mom left me.
Lexi Davis
00:31:52
If my mom's gonna leave me, anyone could leave me.
Lexi Davis
00:31:53
So I to this day know exactly how to do everything on my own.
Lexi Davis
00:31:58
I'm extremely resourceful, I'm extremely independent.
Lexi Davis
00:32:00
And thus I had to learn even like a whole huge journey to soften and reach my feminine.
Lexi Davis
00:32:06
And that's why I created Soft Girl Season, which is one of my pre recorded courses that helps women to soften to receive.
Lexi Davis
00:32:14
When your man is trying to provide for you or give you or take care of you.
Lexi Davis
00:32:17
Most women do not know how to accept it because I sure didn't and I find it in so many of my clients.
Lexi Davis
00:32:22
So this program was developed to help women to actually see, like it's okay to accept help.
Lexi Davis
00:32:28
It doesn't mean that you can't do it yourself.
Lexi Davis
00:32:31
It doesn't mean you don't know how to do it yourself.
Lexi Davis
00:32:33
It doesn't mean that they think you are pathetic or weak or any of these things silly things we have in our head.
Lexi Davis
00:32:38
And instead it brings them joy when you let them help you.
Lexi Davis
00:32:42
And I just found that it's such a necessary skill especially for women to learn because our actual design is receivership.
Lexi Davis
00:32:51
Like we are meant to receive.
Lexi Davis
00:32:52
And it's not just like receiving gifts or something.
Lexi Davis
00:32:55
It's like receiving the moment, feeling the pleasure, feeling the joy and expressing that like that's we're so good at expressing.
Lexi Davis
00:33:02
And so yeah, I just think it's a really important skill that women need to develop and a lot of us haven't because of this independence in society has raised us in a very masculine way.
Lexi Davis
00:33:12
Every human being, therefore we don't know how to receive.
Darrell Snow
00:33:16
And that is exactly what, what our issue is in, in this household.
Darrell Snow
00:33:23
Neither of us is we're great givers, fantastic givers.
Darrell Snow
00:33:27
We're very poor receivers.
Darrell Snow
00:33:29
And you know, it's interesting because not only are we poor receivers, but then the giver is trying to give in the language that we like to be given to.
Darrell Snow
00:33:40
So now we're giving in the wrong language and we're receiving in a horrible language.
Darrell Snow
00:33:44
And it's just a lot of relationships are a lot of work.
Darrell Snow
00:33:48
And that's the one thing about society today.
Darrell Snow
00:33:51
You're vastly younger than, than I am.
Darrell Snow
00:33:55
But you know, I look at my grandparents or my great grandparents generation and I see people who are together 40, 50, 60 years and they stuck through the hardships of relationships, you know, and today it's such a disposable society.
Darrell Snow
00:34:13
If you know, you don't like the one thing that they said then you're ready to walk out the door and you're not willing to put in the work.
Darrell Snow
00:34:20
The one thing that I, that I caveat that with is when I looked at my grandparents, I saw my grandmother.
Darrell Snow
00:34:28
I had two sets of grandparents, like many, one very communicative, very much, you know, partnership and one a very much a dictatorship and an authoritarian where she never expressed her opinion at all.
Darrell Snow
00:34:45
And I remember as an 18 year old young man walking out of their house for the very last time, looking at my grandmother and go, I never want a woman like you.
Darrell Snow
00:34:56
You guys have been together 50 years and I was thinking in my head, I never want someone who can't express themselves or stand up for their own opinion or bring something to light.
Darrell Snow
00:35:08
And you know, I think there has to be that balance between, you know, not being the doormat, but yet being strong enough to be a giver and a receiver.
Lexi Davis
00:35:18
It's hard.
Lexi Davis
00:35:19
Yeah.
Lexi Davis
00:35:20
And I don't, sadly, most people haven't been roman the perfect parents or like the, you know, even a healthy man in their life or a healthy woman in their life that actually understands like the, the true gifts of both sides.
Lexi Davis
00:35:34
So yeah, it's, and in that, like you said, it's like, okay, I saw that and I knew I didn't want that.
Lexi Davis
00:35:39
So there's also the gift in that.
Lexi Davis
00:35:40
But yeah, it's really sad, the suppression that a lot of women have.
Lexi Davis
00:35:44
And also same with men, like there's so many times when I had this hard problem and my actually even my current partner would present me their truth love, like, okay, he's actually being vulnerable.
Lexi Davis
00:35:54
This is a moment he's being vulnerable with me.
Lexi Davis
00:35:56
And then I shut down because what he's saying, I'm like taking it personal and all of a sudden like now it's about me and he's like, well, now I don't feel safe to be vulnerable with you.
Lexi Davis
00:36:04
And this, men experience this so much because once again, that misinterpretation of them.
Lexi Davis
00:36:10
But men, it's very often for them to not open up because they haven't opened up their whole lives.
Lexi Davis
00:36:15
And then when they finally do, it's either, you know, they could fumble it a little bit or say it really directly, which is super hard for us women to hear sometimes.
Lexi Davis
00:36:22
And then we think there's something wrong with us and really that's not what they're saying and da, da, da, da.
Lexi Davis
00:36:27
But anyway, so it just creates this cycle of a lot of us have so much depression and things we haven't shared within ourselves.
Lexi Davis
00:36:33
And that doesn't create for any sort of healthy dynamics.
Lexi Davis
00:36:36
And it's really important to be able to share in that way and to also receive what your partner is saying.
Darrell Snow
00:36:42
I think that's.
Darrell Snow
00:36:43
That's a huge point right there.
Darrell Snow
00:36:45
You have to be able to acknowledge and witness, hey, my partner is being vulnerable.
Darrell Snow
00:36:52
Stop making it about me and be that safe space for them to be vulnerable.
Darrell Snow
00:37:00
We're both psychology majors or yours is a minor, but you have that background.
Darrell Snow
00:37:06
I've traveled all over the United States and lived many, many places.
Darrell Snow
00:37:11
You've traveled all over the world and live many places.
Darrell Snow
00:37:14
My sister once asked me, you know, because I would literally throw a dart at a map.
Darrell Snow
00:37:20
Wherever it landed is where I'd move, you know, and she's like, well, aren't you afraid?
Darrell Snow
00:37:26
Like, you're always moving?
Darrell Snow
00:37:28
And I'm like, no, people are people.
Darrell Snow
00:37:29
If you treat them nice, they'll treat you nice back.
Darrell Snow
00:37:31
If you're an asshole, they're going to be an asshole.
Darrell Snow
00:37:33
Do you find that same worldwide, or is there a part of the region where you just wouldn't go again?
Lexi Davis
00:37:40
Absolutely not.
Lexi Davis
00:37:41
I think people even more so outside of America are so friendly.
Lexi Davis
00:37:45
And I've never held the belief that it's hard to make friends or meet people.
Lexi Davis
00:37:49
And I constantly show people that because I've lived so many different places of the world, and I always find my people, I always find really beautiful, warm, friendly, kind people.
Lexi Davis
00:37:59
They are exist all over the world.
Lexi Davis
00:38:01
And I bring that also to my clients with relationships.
Lexi Davis
00:38:04
I don't care how small of a town you're in.
Lexi Davis
00:38:06
I have one client who was really stubborn with me.
Lexi Davis
00:38:09
She's like, you don't understand, Lexi.
Lexi Davis
00:38:10
I live in the smallest town in Canada.
Lexi Davis
00:38:13
And I was like, I do understand.
Lexi Davis
00:38:15
And you will find your person no matter where you.
Lexi Davis
00:38:18
Wherever you're meant to be, you're going to find your person.
Lexi Davis
00:38:20
Or, you know, there's so many ways it can happen.
Lexi Davis
00:38:22
And she found the perfect man.
Lexi Davis
00:38:24
And I just.
Lexi Davis
00:38:26
It's.
Lexi Davis
00:38:26
It really, truly comes down to belief with that aspect, because I've also met friends that went to Melbourne, Australia, and they're like, I met the worst people.
Lexi Davis
00:38:34
I don't like the people there.
Lexi Davis
00:38:35
And I had the exact opposite experience.
Lexi Davis
00:38:37
I met some of my favorite humans in the entire world there.
Lexi Davis
00:38:41
So that can happen anywhere.
Lexi Davis
00:38:43
And of course, there are some places where maybe it's not so much your people.
Lexi Davis
00:38:48
Like, I actually did struggle with that in Seattle, but I still had people that were there.
Lexi Davis
00:38:52
Like you said, there's always going to be nice people if you are nice to them.
Lexi Davis
00:38:56
So I fully believe you can find great people everywhere.
Darrell Snow
00:39:00
I think that's absolutely true.
Darrell Snow
00:39:02
And I think it's the energy that we bring to it.
Darrell Snow
00:39:04
You know, if we're, I mean, we're all energetic beings and we're all energy.
Darrell Snow
00:39:10
And your energy, depending on how in tuned you are with it, can lead your.
Darrell Snow
00:39:15
Like your energy can lead before you even enter a room.
Darrell Snow
00:39:18
So the energy changes once you're in the room.
Darrell Snow
00:39:21
And you know, for someone who had.
Darrell Snow
00:39:25
You grew up in a single household, you said you were shy, you said you were an introvert.
Darrell Snow
00:39:32
And now you're a world traveler who's lived all over the world.
Darrell Snow
00:39:36
Like you just came out of your shell in such a fashion that it's contagious.
Darrell Snow
00:39:43
And now you probably, even with the work you do, you probably inspire others to go find other places in the world to explore and live as well.
Darrell Snow
00:39:53
Do you find that your wandering bug is contagious?
Lexi Davis
00:39:57
Yes, definitely.
Lexi Davis
00:39:59
It's definitely showing people that it's possible.
Lexi Davis
00:40:01
And it's like the classic thing, if I can do it, you can too.
Lexi Davis
00:40:04
Because I was so shy, so nervous, and it was through traveling I learned way more.
Lexi Davis
00:40:10
I've got to say, I learned way more in traveling than I did in school.
Lexi Davis
00:40:13
I feel like the life experiences so potent when you travel.
Lexi Davis
00:40:18
It really widens your perspective.
Lexi Davis
00:40:21
You get to understand and learn so much about yourself through understanding and seeing the world.
Lexi Davis
00:40:27
And of course, like back in the day when I was traveling a lot before many people were traveling, they're like they wanted to see what other parts of the world were.
Lexi Davis
00:40:35
And I feel like Americans in specific don't really travel internationally as much.
Lexi Davis
00:40:39
And so it was super inspiring to a lot of people.
Lexi Davis
00:40:42
And I was getting questions, I still get questions to this day about how do you do it?
Lexi Davis
00:40:46
What do you do?
Lexi Davis
00:40:47
And I'm like, you just do it.
Lexi Davis
00:40:48
You kind of make the choice and go.
Lexi Davis
00:40:50
You're going to be terrified.
Lexi Davis
00:40:51
I was crying at the airport the first time I did it.
Lexi Davis
00:40:54
You don't get rid of your emotions, but you move through it.
Lexi Davis
00:40:57
You move with them and you take the leap.
Lexi Davis
00:40:59
If you're really feeling called to move to South Africa, go do it.
Lexi Davis
00:41:03
There's never going to be a perfect timing.
Lexi Davis
00:41:05
There's never going to be all the steps just perfectly aligned for you.
Lexi Davis
00:41:08
But you got to just make that choice and everything will start to fall together.
Lexi Davis
00:41:12
And also you're going to get a lot of challenges.
Lexi Davis
00:41:14
That's part of it.
Lexi Davis
00:41:15
But it's like how you move with it and through it, and those all strengthen you in such beautiful ways.
Darrell Snow
00:41:21
Yeah.
Darrell Snow
00:41:22
You have to learn to pivot, for sure.
Darrell Snow
00:41:23
And I'm gonna.
Darrell Snow
00:41:24
I'm gonna pay you a compliment more than I already have, because I really respect your.
Darrell Snow
00:41:29
Your work and who you are.
Darrell Snow
00:41:32
But having watched your journey online and, you know, you've moved from here to there, and you've traveled from here to there, one thing that I will say is that until speaking with you today, I would have never known you were American.
Darrell Snow
00:41:48
And.
Darrell Snow
00:41:49
And you understand what I mean by that.
Darrell Snow
00:41:51
Have you been a world traveler and seen other.
Darrell Snow
00:41:53
Like, when we were in Madrid and Lisbon for our anniversary, you saw Americans, and then you saw travelers vastly different.
Darrell Snow
00:42:06
And I'm going to compliment you.
Darrell Snow
00:42:08
You would never, at least in what's.
Darrell Snow
00:42:11
What's being viewed online, never know that you're an American.
Darrell Snow
00:42:14
You don't.
Lexi Davis
00:42:16
I love that.
Lexi Davis
00:42:17
I love it.
Lexi Davis
00:42:18
When I was in Bali, people always asked me, like, they always thought I wasn't American either.
Lexi Davis
00:42:22
And I think after I left Australia, I picked up a tiny accent then, and.
Lexi Davis
00:42:26
But, yeah, it's definitely an energy.
Lexi Davis
00:42:27
Like, I don't have that.
Lexi Davis
00:42:29
So thank you.
Darrell Snow
00:42:30
No, it comes through, and it shows, for sure.
Darrell Snow
00:42:33
So if there are some people out there listening and whether they're a couple, you know, trying to, you know, deepen their intimacy, or they're just a female who wants to, you know, reconnect with her body or herself or her.
Darrell Snow
00:42:51
Her own emotions, what would be a piece of advice that you would give them to.
Darrell Snow
00:42:56
To help in that journey?
Lexi Davis
00:42:59
Yeah.
Lexi Davis
00:43:00
For couples, I would say to remember that love is an energy that is constant in your relationship.
Lexi Davis
00:43:07
It is a flow of.
Lexi Davis
00:43:08
It's just like this beautiful stream that is never not flowing.
Lexi Davis
00:43:11
And so when you ever feel that the love between you is a little bit dimmed down or there's more separation, that is a great indicator that is something that needs to be communicated.
Lexi Davis
00:43:22
So you need to go within and notice when did that happen, what went down, what need of yours wasn't met, what boundary was crossed, and just take a little bit of time to understand, like, what your true desire is, what the true problem is, not what's on the surface, which oftentimes we go for.
Lexi Davis
00:43:39
And from there, bring it to your partner and come back to connection and let them know your intention is, I want to reconnect with you, baby.
Lexi Davis
00:43:46
I want to feel our love again.
Lexi Davis
00:43:49
And I know it's possible, but clearly there's something that needs to be discussed, and I Think in that we can save so many relationships because the more we hold on to things, the more resentment builds and the more separation, separation and space builds within us.
Lexi Davis
00:44:01
So really taking the time to have those uncomfortable conversations is going to heal your love and keep it like this ever ending flow.
Lexi Davis
00:44:09
And for women connecting to their bodies, it's getting out of your mind.
Lexi Davis
00:44:14
So when you are in a situation where you get triggered or he doesn't text you back or whatever happens, how can you stop the stories in your head which are addicting and they take you into such dark places and instead get into your body.
Lexi Davis
00:44:29
You can start this by putting on a song, moving your body, dancing, like just physically landing back in your body, using your hands and like grabbing your body, massaging your body and know like there's something physically happening in my body this moment.
Lexi Davis
00:44:43
Can I find what is happening?
Lexi Davis
00:44:45
Maybe your tummy is feeling like it's in a knot or there's heat coming out of your hands and just start to get curious of what is happening in my body and move the awareness from the mind to the body and that's gonna save you a lot of mental horror of that.
Darrell Snow
00:45:05
I'm gonna ask you one final question that I ask all my guests.
Darrell Snow
00:45:09
What does a warrior spirit or having a warrior spirit mean to Lexi Davis?
Lexi Davis
00:45:15
It means really never giving up.
Lexi Davis
00:45:18
I feel like that is what comes to me when I hear this.
Lexi Davis
00:45:21
And it's like going after what you want and knowing that it's possible and holding the beliefs, holding desires.
Lexi Davis
00:45:28
I always had the desire to have the most beautiful, loving relationship, even though I never was role modeled it, but I just kept believing and kept making it happen.
Lexi Davis
00:45:35
And so this spirit of continuously taking that action and learning and growing and building yourself and creating the life you want, it's so possible for whatever your dreams are.
Darrell Snow
00:45:48
Well, I love that and I love the work that you do and it's very vital and necessary, especially in today's society.
Darrell Snow
00:45:54
So I thank you for joining me today and thank you for sharing your wisdom and, and you know, I just appreciate you.
Lexi Davis
00:46:03
Thank you so much.
Lexi Davis
00:46:04
So, so beautiful.
Darrell Snow
00:46:06
And if you would like to connect with Lexi, you can do so on her website, Alive to Enjoy or on any of the social medias, Facebook and LinkedIn.
Darrell Snow
00:46:17
So we thank you for joining us on this edition of A Warrior Spirit.
Darrell Snow
00:46:22
Be sure to like or subscribe so you catch all of the episodes.